An Unexpected Offer
by If I Could
Summary: Six weeks since Jackson's death and Aaron is struggling to cope. Help is offered from an unexpected source.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer - I do not own any of these characters, they belong to ITV and Emmerdale.**

Aaron was lost in his thoughts. He was supposed to be changing some brake pads but he couldn't concentrate. It had been six weeks since Jackson's death and the pain was as strong as if it had happened yesterday. It was there when he woke up and it stayed with him until he tried to go to sleep. He kept expecting to see him, hear his voice and it was never going to happen. He'd thought going back to work might help, give him something else to think about but it wasn't that easy, especially considering where the garage was. His thoughts were interrupted by his mobile beeping. He ignored it, whoever it was who had sent him the message could wait, he'd read it later, maybe. He glanced over towards Jackson's house and had to look away again quickly. So many of his memories were concerned with what had happened in that house, not all of them good. His mobile beeped again. He sighed and reached into his pocket taking his phone out to see who was disturbing his thoughts. He looked at the name on the screen and his heart suddenly beat a little bit faster. He wasn't sure he wanted to read the message, he was tempted to just get rid of it without looking at it but curiosity got the better of him and he read it. He shook his head not quite believing what he was seeing and read the message for a second time just to be sure.  
>The message said: Hi Aaron, just heard the news about Jackson. I'm so, so sorry. Flynn. <p>

Of all the people to hear from, Flynn was the last person he would have expected to get in touch with him. He'd forgotten that his number was still in his phone and couldn't believe that Flynn had held onto his. What was he playing at, why get in touch after all this time, after everything that had happened between them? He hadn't seen or heard from Flynn since that night he'd left him to come back to Jackson for good. He hadn't even thought about him, not once, until now and he didn't like how it made him feel. He snapped his phone shut and put it back in his pocket, annoyed with himself for reading the message, annoyed that Flynn was back in his head again. Thirteen words, that was all it was. Thirteen words he wished he hadn't read but at the same time was glad he did. He went back to changing the brake pads, suddenly having no trouble concentrating on the job in hand. Thinking about brake pads was a lot easier than allowing himself to think about Flynn again. 

After finishing changing the pads, he checked his watch and was glad to see it was lunchtime. It meant he could hide away for a while. He went home, he couldn't face the pub, full of people being nice to him, caring about him, asking how he was doing. He couldn't handle it. He almost wished he was back to being Public Enemy Number One again. He was far more comfortable with how people treated him back then and he knew how to react in return. He glanced down at his half eaten sandwich and wondered how he'd even managed to eat what he had. Paddy was always fussing, trying to make sure he ate properly but it was hard to swallow anything when you had a permanent lump in your throat and a sick feeling in the pit of your stomach. He looked around him, around the kitchen where he and Jackson had come so close to kissing that day before they were interrupted. It was the house in which they'd spent their first night together, where Aaron had taken the biggest step of his life because he'd known that once he'd slept with Jackson, there was no denying who he was anymore. It was also where they'd lived together for a while. He felt the all too familiar stinging in his eyes as the tears began to well up. He really thought he had no more tears left to cry but, sometimes like now, they just kept coming. He put his head in his hands and sobbed, tears streaming from his blue eyes and running down his cheeks. When the tears finally stopped, he wiped his face, threw what was left of his lunch in the bin and headed back to work. He was trying to keep to this normal routine but he was struggling. Everyone kept telling him that it would get better with time and he would be able to cope with life again but he just couldn't see it. How could he live his life without the one person who was his life? As he walked back to the garage, his phone beeped again with another message. He jumped and grabbed it straight away this time only to see it was a message from Adam. Just for a split second, he was disappointed but he pushed that thought right out of his head. After all, who did he expect the message to be from, what did he have to be disappointed about? 

A few hours later and it was nearly time to go home for the night. " Right you, me and you are going for a pint tonight, even if I have to drag you in there, hold your nose and pour it down your throat myself" said Cain.  
>"Nah, you're alright, I don't really fancy it" Aaron replied.<br>"Since when have I cared what you fancy? Come on, if I have to look at your miserable face, it may as well be somewhere that serves alcohol, it'll make it a bit more bearable." Aaron pulled a face but he didn't have the strength to argue. They locked up the garage.  
>"After you, smiler" Cain said as he shoved Aaron in the direction of the pub. They stood at the bar while Cain ordered a couple of pints. Aaron's eyes never left the floor, not wanting to make eye contact with anyone. He didn't want to give people an excuse to start talking to him. He felt as if everyone was looking at him and wished he was anywhere else except there.<br>"Come on, we'll sit over there, that way you won't put people off their drinks." Cain flashed a sarcastic smile in Aaron's direction as he walked past him and led the way to a table. Aaron followed and sat down opposite him. They sat in silence for a while before Cain's voice interrupted his thoughts. "Are you actually going to drink that pint now I've bought it or just stare at it?" Aaron sighed, picked it up and took a sip. "There, happy now" he snapped. "Flaming ecstatic" Cain snapped back. Aaron immediately felt guilty, he knew what his uncle was trying to do but he wasn't in the mood. "Look, I'm sorry, right. I know you're only trying to help but I just don't feel very sociable ok?" he said, his voice so quiet Cain could barely hear it. Cain looked at him and for once in his life didn't know what to do or say. He usually had an answer for everything but not this time. How could anyone or anything help Aaron with what he was going through?

He let out a sigh. "Right, I'm gonna tell you something now but if you repeat a word of it to anyone, I'll deny ever saying it and then, I'll batter you." Aaron looked up and frowned, wondering what he was about to be told.

Cain sighed again and his voice softened as he continued. " I liked Jackson, he was alright. I wasn't sure about the whole, you know, you and him together thing but I got used to it. At the end of the day, he was just a bloke who happened to fancy other blokes. Only thing wrong with him was his taste in men, I mean, he fancied you." Aaron smiled, he couldn't help himself.  
>"Me and him, we may have pretended not to get on but he enjoyed the banter as much as I did. I miss his cheeky little face giving me grief."<br>Aaron never took his eyes off Cain's face as he was speaking. He had a lump in his throat the size of a golf ball. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Cain cleared his throat.  
>"Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that you're not on your own, you're not the only one who misses him. We might not show it and it might seem like you're the only one who's still going through it but you're not. The whole village misses him. It won't be the same without him."<br>Aaron just nodded, he didn't trust himself to speak right now. He knew everyone missed Jackson, they told him often enough but it didn't help him right now did it? He stood up quickly, he had to get out. "I, er, I'm gonna head off. I'll see you tomorrow" he mumbled. He left the pub glad to be out in the fresh air. Cain's words were still ringing in his ears. He'd never heard Cain speak like that about anyone before. Mind you, Jackson had that effect on everyone he met. Everyone liked Jackson, there was just something about him that people warmed to. He knew, in the beginning, people thought that he wasn't good enough for Jackson, he'd thought it too but Jackson had convinced him that they were wrong, that he was wrong. After the accident, he had grown up a lot and people's opinions of him had changed but it made no difference to him. Apart from Paddy, there was only one person whose opinion he ever really cared about and he wasn't here anymore. He put his hands in his pockets and walked up the hill towards home. He knew he had to get out of the village tonight, even if it was only for a few hours. It was too claustrophobic, he couldn't breathe. He had to escape. 

When he got indoors, he undressed and jumped straight in the shower. He stood there letting the water wash over him, wishing his sadness could be washed away as easily as the oil and grease was. He got out of the shower, put a towel around his waist and headed into his room to get dressed. Without thinking, he put his hand up to the silver chain he was wearing, the one with the cross and the medal on it, the one that Jackson used to wear and Hazel had given to him. He began rubbing it. He didn't do jewellery but it was all he had left of Jackson and now he never took it off. Rubbing it sometimes relaxed him, he didn't know why but it did. He sat down on his bed. He wasn't the tough guy everyone thought he was, the image he used to show to the world. Underneath, he was sensitive, caring and desperate for someone to love him and make him feel like he was worth something. Jackson had been that person. It had taken him ages to believe the things that Jackson told him, to let him hold him, touch him, show him the affection he longed for and for him to give the same back. He'd finally found someone who loved him as much as he loved them and now he was gone. What had he done to deserve this? Was he really that bad a person that his only source of happiness had to be so cruelly taken away from him? He didn't know how long he'd sat there but it must have been a while because he suddenly realised he was freezing and beginning to shiver. He put on some clothes, grabbed his keys, wallet and phone and set off for the bus stop. 

Bar West was packed, full of people laughing, enjoying themselves without a care in the world and yet, even among all these people, Aaron felt completely alone. He was glad when he'd ordered his drink that their barman hadn't been working. That's what Jackson had called him ever since that first night they'd come in together after the accident and he'd given them their first round on the house. It was something that he'd done every time since and they had always appreciated the gesture. He knew if he had have been working, he'd have asked where Jackson was and he wasn't ready to have that conversation. He picked up his bottle of lager and pushed his way through the crowd until he found a table as far away from the bar as possible, where it was a bit quieter. He sat down and looked around him. He'd known he would end up here, he felt comfortable in a strange sort of way and, even though being here had lots of memories for him, most of them were good unlike back in the village. He was only approached once but one look from him told the guy he was wasting his time and Aaron was left alone. He sipped at his lager and lost himself in his thoughts again. "Hi Aaron" said a voice. Aaron recognised it without having to look up. He didn't want to hear that voice, didn't want to see the face that the voice belonged to but he looked up anyway. Flynn was looking down at him, a shy smile on his face. "Alright" Aaron mumbled.  
>"Look, I er, I know I'm probably the last person you want to see right now but I, er, well I just wanted to say in person how sorry I am ...about Jackson." Aaron just nodded. "Well, I, er, I'll leave you to it." He smiled and began walking away.<br>"No, wait." Aaron heard his own voice call out but he didn't seem to be in control of what he was saying. It was like the words had come out without his brain telling him he was going to speak. Flynn turned back round, a surprised look on his face. "Why don't you have a beer with me, if you want to that is. I'm bored of my own company." Nodding his head, Flynn replied "Now that I can believe."  
>"Right, just for that, you can get them in" Aaron said. Flynn shrugged his shoulders. "Walked right into that one, didn't I?" He headed off to the bar. Aaron smiled, he couldn't help it. Flynn still looked good, still made him feel funny inside when he smiled at him, just like Jackson used to do. Aaron put his head down and shut his eyes. He'd worry about the guilt tomorrow. Right now, he just wanted some company. <p>

Flynn stood at the bar waiting for their drinks. He hadn't expected to see Aaron tonight, in fact, he hadn't planned on being here himself. He'd been due to meet a mate in town but on the way had got a text to say his mate couldn't make it. Rather than go home again, he thought he'd come here for a couple of beers and now, here he was buying Aaron a drink again. He'd only just found out about Jackson and had sent Aaron the text as soon as he'd heard. He didn't know if it was a good idea or a terrible idea but he sent it anyway. He wasn't expecting a reply and wasn't surprised when he didn't get one. When he saw Aaron sitting on his own tonight, his heart just broke. He stood for twenty minutes watching him, looking to see if he was with anyone but it soon became obvious that he wasn't. He looked so sad, so lonely, he knew he had to go over and say something. He didn't know how Aaron would react but he didn't care either. Whatever Aaron did or said couldn't hurt him any more than Aaron had hurt him already. He'd been surprised when Aaron asked him to have a beer with him, whatever he was expecting, it wasn't that but that was Aaron all over. You thought you knew what he was going to do or say and then he would do something completely different.

"Here you go" he said placing a bottle in front of Aaron and putting his coat on the back of the chair. He sat opposite him, not wanting to get too close. "Cheers" Aaron said smiling at him but the smile didn't quite reach his eyes. Aaron had the most gorgeous blue eyes Flynn had ever seen but tonight, they were different. The sparkle had gone, it was like a light had been turned off and Flynn knew why. Jackson had been the light in Aaron's life and now he was gone forever.  
>"So, how are you?" Flynn asked. Aaron just looked at him. "Sorry, stupid question, I just couldn't think of anything else to say." Flynn shook his head and took a swig of his lager. He looked sheepishly at Aaron. "Sorry" he said again.<br>"Don't tell me I'm going to have to tell you again to stop apologising all the time" Aaron said "I thought we'd been through this once already."  
>"Yeah, we have sor..." Flynn stopped himself just in time.<br>"So, talk to me. What you been up to then?" Aaron asked.  
>"Not a lot really, still going to college. I've been away for a while, that's why I only just found out about Jackson." Flynn went quiet, not sure what the sound of his name would do to Aaron.<br>"I got your text. I'm sorry I didn't reply." Aaron put his eyes back down to look at the table.  
>"Hey, don't worry about it. You've got enough on your plate. I just wanted you to know that…."<br>"Yeah, well" Aaron interrupted, "Thanks anyway." 

They both sat in silence for a while, neither one knowing what to say next. Flynn took a deep breath, it was now or never and he chose now, before he lost his nerve. "Look Aaron, I just want to say that if you need me, you've got my number. If you need someone to talk to, shout at, a shoulder to cry on, someone who's not from the village well, you know I'll be there."  
>Aaron looked at Flynn, a confused look on his face. "You what?" he said.<br>"You're not really going to make me say it again are you cos it was hard enough first time round."  
>"No, I heard you but why would you offer to do that after the way I treated you. I was horrible to you."<br>Flynn smiled a shy little smile. "Well, you were in a difficult situation weren't you? Trying to cope with what had happened to Jackson, trying to move on, it can't have been easy."  
>Aaron's look darkened. He looked away, shook his head and looked back again. "And what would you know? You weren't there. So what, now he's gone, you thought you'd try your luck again did you? Try to worm your way back into my life by being nice to me and take his place, well it's not gonna happen."<p>

"No!" Flynn shouted. "Do you really think I'd stoop that low? D'you know, I knew this was a bad idea, I should have kept me mouth shut."  
>" Yeah, well why didn't ya?"Aaron yelled.<br>"Because you looked like you needed a friend, alright, that's why."  
>Aaron couldn't look at him, frightened of what he might do if he did. Flynn looked at Aaron, seeing the pain and the anguish written all over his face. He shook his head. I must be mad he thought to himself. "Aaron, please, look at me" Flynn said quietly. "Please!"<br>Reluctantly, Aaron turned his head to find Flynn's eyes fixed on him. He bit his bottom lip and hoped the tears that were close to the surface again wouldn't materialise. "I'm not trying to take Jackson's place. No one can and I would never try. You two had something very special, you loved each other very much. I found that out the hard way. And I won't patronise you by saying I know what you're going through because I don't. I mean, I can imagine but I don't know. To be honest, I don't know how you even get out of bed in the morning."  
>Aaron took a deep breath. He had calmed down a bit listening to Flynn speak. "Yeah well if I'm honest, neither do I" he said. "Look, I'm sorry for saying what I said before. I know you wouldn't do that, try to take Jackson's place I mean. I know you're trying to help. See, you were trying to be nice to me and I was horrible back. Why are you even bothering?" <p>

Flynn's heart was pounding now, he was surprised Aaron couldn't hear it even with all the noise that was around them. He leant forward and put his hands on the table. His fingers were inches away from Aaron's but he didn't dare try to touch him although he wanted to, just to offer some comfort. He took a deep breath before speaking. "Why am I bothering? For two reasons. One, because I like you but you already know that."  
>Aaron looked into Flynn's eyes and saw something he didn't want to see. He saw how Flynn was looking at him, he'd seen that look before. He couldn't cope with it then and he certainly couldn't cope with it now. It was a look that made him feel things, things he didn't want to feel. He looked away, choosing to look down at his bottle of lager instead.<br>"and the second reason is because, like Jackson, I can see that under that hard man exterior and that I don't give a shit about anyone or anything attitude is a really nice guy who in the right circumstances with the right people cares an awful lot. I know what you're like, you won't talk, you'll just bottle everything up and you won't ask for help. So, I'm offering. If you need anything, just phone me only try not to make it too late at night, some of us need more beauty sleep than others."  
>Aaron smiled at him. "Just which one of us needs the most beauty sleep then?" he asked.<br>"Oh no, I'll leave that up to you to figure out" Flynn replied. "Seriously though, just think about what I've said ok?" He grabbed his coat and put it on. "Well, maybe see you around Aaron. Take care, yeah." He smiled and began to walk away.  
>"Flynn" Aaron called after him.<br>Flynn turned round. "Thank you, for the offer." Flynn just smiled and Aaron smiled back. As Flynn walked away, Aaron took a swig of his lager. He made his mind up there and then. He'd like to see him again soon. Flynn wasn't Jackson, he'd never feel the same way about him as he felt about Jackson but it would be nice to have a beer with him, play a few games of pool maybe. Nothing too heavy, he wouldn't be ready for anything like that ever again but it had been nice to see him though. 

Flynn walked towards the door. He was so pleased he'd decided to come in here tonight and not go back home. It had been good seeing Aaron again, very good in fact. He hoped that he would see him again soon. The circumstances that had brought them back together again for this chance meeting were terrible, tragic beyond comprehension. He knew that Aaron would probably never get over it, never get over Jackson but, if all he got from it at the end of the day was a friendship, then he would settle for that. Ideally, friendship wasn't what he wanted, he wanted more but what he wanted wasn't important right now. What was important to him was Aaron and helping him in whatever way he could, whatever way Aaron would let him. After that, who knows? 

**This is my first attempt at writing a story. Please let me know what you think, if it should stay a one off or if I should continue.  
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	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for your kind comments. Here's the next chapter, it will get happier, I promise!**

After Flynn had left, Aaron stayed to finish his drink. He thought about what had just happened, meeting Flynn again, having a drink with him, talking to him. He felt a bit better than when he had come in earlier that night and that was a good thing, right? Flynn was a nice guy, a nice guy who he had dragged into the nightmare that was what he & Jackson were going through at the time. Aaron didn't like thinking about that time in his life, it was probably the most confused he'd ever been since first realising he was gay but it had made him realise one thing. He liked Flynn but he loved Jackson. That was what had made him tell Flynn that they couldn't be together the way Flynn wanted them to be, that he could never give him what he wanted because he loved Jackson. Aaron still felt guilty about what he had put Flynn through, it hadn't been fair. He'd said sorry at the time but he knew by Flynn's face it hadn't helped. Flynn had made him feel even worse then by saying that he understood and he hoped everything worked out for them both. Seeing him again tonight had been strange, him realising from their short chat that he still liked him and Flynn saying that he still liked him too. He felt a bit weird thinking about Flynn, it didn't feel right but he couldn't help it. If he was Flynn, he wouldn't have come over to speak, he wouldn't have come anywhere near him, he'd have ignored him and left him to it but he wasn't Flynn was he?

He glanced up just as a guy walked past his table. He was wearing a red check shirt and jeans. Instantly, Aaron's thoughts switched to someone else who used to wear a red check shirt, someone who he had dropped his guard for and let in, someone who had seen a side of him no one else had. He felt like he'd been punched in the gut. Flynn was forgotten, replaced by images of Jackson. Jackson smiling at him, playing pool, pulling faces, holding him close. Oh god, he missed him so much. What on earth was he doing here? He had no right to be out drinking, talking, he had no right to be here without Jackson and he definitely had no right to be thinking about someone else. He jumped up and virtually ran through the crowds to get out, pushing people out of his way, not paying any attention to the shouts and moans aimed in his direction. He ran up the stairs and into the fresh air, breathing deeply, trying to calm himself down. On the journey home, he kept hearing the same phrase going round and round in his head - I like Flynn but I love Jackson, I like Flynn but I love Jackson.

He felt so guilty when he got home. How could he have let someone else inside his head, somewhere only Jackson should be? How could he have had a drink with someone when he was supposed to be spending time alone? How could he have been willing to see Flynn again knowing what that had done before to him & Jackson? He saw in his mind Jackson's face, pretending he was ok about it all but Aaron had seen the hurt, the pain, the complete and utter misery he was feeling. It showed in those beautiful big brown eyes of his. The image of how Jackson had looked that day was embedded in his memory and thinking about it made his heart feel like it was being squeezed in a vice. The tears began to flow as the guilt turned into overwhelming sadness, sadness for the loss of the man he loved more than anything and for the loss of the life they could have had together had things been different. There were also tears for himself, for the life he had been left with. Jackson was gone but he was still here. Jackson had said on more than one occasion that his life was a living hell and Aaron now knew exactly what he meant, how he had felt. He hated feeling like this and he had another fifty or so years of this torture to get through. How, he didn't know and, right now, he didn't even know if he wanted to live that long, not if every day and every night was like this one. He just wanted to go to sleep and wake up tomorrow to find it was all a horrible dream but that was never going to happen. Jackson would always now be just a memory and Aaron would have to somehow find a way to get his life back on track. He'd tossed and turned, trying to sleep, praying for sleep to put his mind out of its misery for a while. The last time he had looked at the clock, it had said quarter past three.

Aaron turned over in bed and looked at the clock on the bedside table. The red numbers jumped out at him telling him it was twenty past six in the morning. He sighed and rubbed his eyes. Great, just over three hours sleep, just what he needed, another night of having too many thoughts running through his head and another day to face of trying to keep those same thoughts away. Last night, he'd left the village to get away somewhere where he knew he wouldn't be pestered or spoken to, where no one would give him pitying looks or offer some words of wisdom that he didn't want to hear. The evening had started off just how he wanted, just him and his lager and his thoughts. Then, Flynn had turned up and spoke to him. He hadn't been expecting that and he didn't like it when things happened he wasn't expecting. He liked to be in control, that way he could be prepared. He liked to be on his guard, always on the front foot so nothing surprised him. Well last night he had been caught completely off guard and had spent most of the night thinking about it.

Now, it was the start of another day. He lay in bed, not wanting to move, not wanting to face the world today. He wanted to stay here, where it was safe, where he could be on his own. He knew he would have to get up and go to work though, yesterday had been a disaster. He hadn't got much done, his thoughts had been elsewhere.

He got up, got dressed and went downstairs. He knew he should eat something so he put some bread in the toaster. He made a cup of tea and ate his breakfast, forcing the toast down him. He expected his mind to be racing especially after last night but it wasn't. In fact, all he was thinking about was how tired he still felt. He had just finished eating when he heard footsteps upstairs. That was his cue to leave, he wasn't in the mood for a chat so he grabbed his jacket and left for work. He was surprised when he got there to see that Cain was already working.

"Blimey, have you had a bang on the head or something, you're never here this early."

"No, I haven't but you will have if you make cheeky comments like that again. Besides, apart from those brake pads you changed yesterday, nothing else got done round here so someone's got to be here to get these cars fixed" Cain said.

"Yeah, sorry about that, yesterday was a bad day." Aaron sighed and looked at the floor.

"Yeah well, let's hope today's a bit better then. Now, make yourself useful and put the kettle on before you start."

Aaron smiled and walked into the garage. Cain watched him go, hoping that yesterday was just what he had said it was, a bad day but, this last week or so, every day had seemed to be a bad day. He decided to keep Aaron as busy as possible. Luckily, there was plenty of work on so it wouldn't be difficult. They worked steadily all day, neither saying a great deal, just getting on with their jobs. Cain was glad that Aaron hadn't mentioned their conversation in the pub yesterday. He had meant every word but he didn't want to be reminded of it. Every so often, when he thought that Aaron wouldn't see, he looked over just to make sure he was ok. Aaron's face was serious, full of concentration but there were no signs of the tears or the pain he had seen yesterday. He just looked pale and tired instead. Aaron saw Cain out of the corner of his eye watching him. He carried on working until Cain looked away, then he smiled to himself. His uncle was keeping an eye on him thinking he wouldn't notice. After yesterday, he wasn't surprised. He carried on working, the only thoughts in his head at the moment were those concerning his work. He had been waiting for something to come into his mind, a memory, something that Jackson had said to him, something they'd done together but it didn't happen.

Maybe he was just too tired for all that. Today, he was just thinking about his work and making sure he did a good job. He wanted to then go home, go to bed and fall asleep, preferably before quarter past three in the morning.


	3. Chapter 3

Aaron was lying on his bed listening to some music with his eyes closed, trying to relax. The last few days hadn't been too bad, all things considered. He'd been sleeping better which had helped and eating a bit better too. He'd even had a drink with Cain in the pub without having to be dragged in. It was weird. Last week, he was a wreck, now he felt like he was taking the first steps to becoming his old self again. He sat up and noticed his phone on the bedside table. It had been just over a week since he had bumped into Flynn at Bar West. He'd thought that he might have got in touch, just to see how he was doing, but he hadn't. Then again, why would he? Flynn had made the offer that if he needed him, he'd be there. That meant he would have to be the one to get in touch, make the first move. He chewed his bottom lip as he thought about it. Would it really be that wrong to get in touch, just for a chat? He was allowed to chat to friends wasn't he? There was nothing wrong with that surely. It was no different to him talking to Adam or Paddy. He sighed and shook his head. Who was he kidding, of course it was different to talking to Adam or Paddy. This was Flynn he was talking about, the person who he started seeing because Jackson pushed him into it and who he found himself liking more than he wanted to.

He picked up his phone and twisted it in his hands as he thought about what he should do. He checked his watch, it was just after 9pm. Before he changed his mind, he opened his phone and typed a quick message: "Hi, are you busy, can we talk?" His finger hovered over the screen, send or cancel, those were his options. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and pressed send. He put his phone down on the bed and lay back down again. Well, it was done now, he'd reached out, made that first move. Now, it was up to Flynn. Five minutes turned into ten as Aaron tried to stay calm but there was no denying how nervous he felt. He nearly hit the ceiling as his phone beeped, telling him he had one new message. He looked at the screen, it was him. He read the message: "no I'm not and course we can. Call me."

Aaron smiled. He had wondered whether Flynn had meant what he'd said or whether he had regretted it when he woke up the next morning. Obviously, he had meant every word. Deep down, Aaron had known that but it was nice to have it confirmed. He sat up, took another deep breath and dialled the number. Flynn's voice sounded in his ear.

"Hi Aaron, how are you?" Flynn's voice was calm and friendly.

"Hi, I'm er, I'm not bad. You?"

"Yeah, good thanks."

"You said I could call anytime, are you sure that's still ok?"

"Absolutely. So, how are you doing really?"

That was a good question. Right now, he was doing fine, last week, not so good.

"I have good days and bad. The last few days have been more good than bad. I'm still trying to get used to things."

"I can imagine. It'll take time so don't be too hard on yourself, you'll get there"

A couple of weeks ago, someone had said virtually the same thing to him and he'd wanted to slap them yet when Flynn said it, he didn't mind.

"Look, I know I asked if we could talk but I can't... I'm not ready to talk about what happened, about Jackson, not yet. Not with you or anybody else for that matter. I just…."

"Hey, it's fine. You don't need to explain. I said, whatever you needed. If you just wanted to hear my voice again, that's ok."

Aaron laughed "Yeah, as if. Don't flatter yourself. I did just want to speak to you again, that's all."

" Well, that's fine by me. We can talk about whatever you want."

Their conversation carried on, talking about every day things, football, films, music just like any two friends would. It felt good, it felt comfortable.

"So, do you, er, fancy meeting up for a drink then?" Flynn asked

"Yeah, that'd be good. When did you have in mind?"

"How about tomorrow?"

"Yeah, tomorrow's good."

"Ok then, how about Bar West, 7.30?"

Aaron hesitated. Bar West, could he after how he had felt last time?

"Aaron, everything ok?" Flynn's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine. Bar West 7.30 it is then."

"Great, see you there. Oh and Aaron, I'm glad you phoned."

"Yeah, me too."

He shut his phone and dropped it onto the bed. That hadn't been as bad as he'd thought it would be. He was surprised how easily they were able to talk, hardly any awkwardness at all. Whether tomorrow would be the same, only time would tell.

Aaron stood outside Bar West looking through the glass. He had very nearly texted Flynn to cancel but had decided against it. Now he was here, he still didn't know if he could do this. His stomach was in knots. Part of him wanted to turn and run before it was too late, part of him wanted to stay. He could see Flynn from where he was standing. He was sitting at a table swinging slightly from side to side on a stool. He watched as Flynn looked at his watch, picked up a beer mat and started playing with it, tapping it on the table. Then he put that down and started tapping his fingers on the table instead. He looked at his watch again, ran his fingers through his hair. Aaron couldn't help but smile to see Flynn so nervous. It made him feel better, knowing that he wasn't the only one. He took a deep breath, pushed open the door and went in. He walked over to where Flynn was sitting. "Alright" he said. "Been waiting long?" Flynn smiled at him. "No, just got here actually. I've only just sat down." Aaron smiled. He knew Flynn was lying but he couldn't say anything because then he'd have to admit that he'd stood watching him.

"Want a beer then?" he said

"Yeah, that'd be great" Flynn replied.

Aaron turned and walked towards the bar. Flynn let out a deep breath. Well, he'd turned up, that was a good start. He'd half expected a text from him cancelling or to have been left sitting there like a lemon. He was so nervous, he didn't want to mess this up. Aaron was so fragile and one wrong move from him could send him running in the opposite direction never to return. Still, he'd offered his help and he was going to do his best to make sure that help was exactly what he was going to give.

Aaron returned with the drinks and placed the bottles on the table, taking a seat opposite Flynn. Flynn noticed that he looked different today, his eyes seemed a little brighter, he seemed a bit more relaxed or maybe he was just imagining it. Neither of them spoke, the silence between them a little bit awkward. Flynn decided to break it.

"So, are you up for a game of pool. I'll go easy on you in case you're a bit rusty."

"Me, rusty, you wish. Pool skills like mine don't just disappear you know."

"Ooh, I'm scared. Come on then hot shot, show me what you've got."

They picked up their bottles and walked over to the pool table.

"Rack em up then" Aaron said as he selected two pool cues, handing one to Flynn. "Loser buys the next round."

"You better have lots of money with you then" Flynn said smiling.

Aaron said nothing and just smiled back.

They both soon relaxed and began to enjoy themselves. The next couple of hours passed quickly. They had a few games of pool, Aaron even managed to win a couple of them, had a few beers and talked about nothing really, just general chatter. They were sitting at a table, this time next to each other, not opposite. There was still a gap between them but they were both comfortable enough. "So" Flynn said " have you enjoyed yourself then?"

Aaron smiled "Yeah, I have. I haven't had a game of pool in ages."

Flynn smiled back at him. "Well, if you want a rematch anytime, let me know."

Aaron was about to answer when he heard a song begin to play over the club's sound system. Oh no, he thought, not this, not now.

Flynn noticed the change of expression on Aaron's face, the way the colour had drained away.

"What's up?" he said. Aaron couldn't answer

"Aaron, what's the matter?" Flynn asked again, his voice a little bit louder.

"I, er, I've got to get out of here" Aaron mumbled as he stood up and moved quickly through the bar.

"Aaron, Aaron wait" Flynn called after him but Aaron didn't stop. Flynn got up and followed him outside where he found him leaning against a wall with his eyes shut and his hands in his pockets. He stood in front of him and said " Do you want to tell me what's going on?"

Aaron kept his eyes shut as he thought about what to say next. Why did that song have to come on, they'd been having such a good time. That song had so many memories for him. It was the song that he'd played the first night him and Jackson had spent the night together, the night he'd taken the step that would change his life forever. He couldn't tell Flynn that though could he, how pathetic would that sound? He opened his eyes to find Flynn looking at him, concern written all over his face.

"Look, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to but something freaked you out. I just need to know if you're ok."

Aaron decided there and then to do something he wouldn't have done a few months back. He was going to tell the truth and if Flynn thought he was a wimp or an idiot then so be it.

In a quiet voice, Aaron said "it was that song, the one that just started playing. It has a lot of memories attached to it of me...and Jackson. When I heard it, I just had to get out. I can't listen to that song anymore, I just can't."

Flynn didn't say anything, he just nodded his head. He was surprised at Aaron's honesty, he would never have admitted that to him before and he was pleased that he trusted him enough to tell him now.

"Music can do that, can't it? Bring memories back."

Aaron nodded as a tear rolled down his cheek. "Hey, come on, it's ok" Flynn said. He didn't know if he was going to regret what he was about to do but he had to do something. He took a couple of steps forward and put his arms around Aaron's shoulders, pulling him in so that Aaron's head was resting on his shoulder. To his surprise, Aaron let him, he didn't pull away.

"It's ok" he whispered, "It's ok."

Aaron cried silently on Flynn's shoulder. He wanted to be held, comforted, soothed and it felt good to be in someone's arms again.

After a couple of minutes, Aaron pulled back. He wiped his eyes and smiled shyly at Flynn. "I'm sorry" he said.

"Don't be daft, you've got nothing to be sorry about" Flynn replied." I said, remember, if you need a shoulder to cry on…"

"I know, I know. Look, I'm gonna call it a night, you don't mind do you?"

"Course not, wanna share a taxi? we can get me dropped off first."

"Yeah, fine."

They walked towards the taxi rank in silence but it wasn't uncomfortable. When they arrived at Flynn's house, he gave Aaron some money towards the cost of the taxi.

"I'll phone you tomorrow, see how you're doing" Flynn said

Aaron smiled at him. "Make sure you do" he replied.


	4. Chapter 4

**A new chapter. The lyrics, of course, don't belong to me, they belong to Coldplay.**

Aaron woke up and lay there staring at the ceiling. He was thinking about last night. His thoughts were all over the place. He had felt nervous about going out but convinced himself he had nothing to worry about. It was a few beers with Flynn, nothing more. As the evening progressed, he'd relaxed and had a good time until that song and then all he could think of was Jackson again, what they'd meant to each other, how important Jackson had been to him and the gap he'd left in his life. He closed his eyes and shook his head. He couldn't believe that he had let Flynn hug him while he cried over Jackson. How wrong was that? Or maybe it wasn't wrong. He could have pulled away, took Flynn's arms from around his shoulders, told him to get lost and leave him alone but he didn't. He'd wanted that comfort, needed it so what did that tell him? God, what a mess. Just when he thought he was starting to get things sorted, it all became mixed up again. How was he going to figure this one out? He realised he was playing with the chain he wore, rolling it between his fingers and thumb. He sighed. It wasn't helping him to relax this morning. So much for things getting easier as time goes by.

Flynn woke up and went downstairs to get some breakfast, also thinking about the night before. He couldn't believe that Aaron had let him hug him or that he had cried in front of him. What a difference a few months made. He was fully expecting to be pushed away, shouted at, told to do one but it didn't happen. The thing that Flynn really couldn't get his head round though was what he felt when he was holding Aaron. All he felt was sadness for what Aaron was going through and how he wanted to take that pain and sorrow away, even if it was only for a few minutes. There was nothing sexual about that hug at all and that surprised him. It had just felt like one friend offering comfort to another. The fact that Aaron was crying over the loss of his boyfriend didn't bother him either. How weird was that? Maybe, he was so focussed on being Aaron's friend and doing what was best for Aaron that his own feelings had been pushed to the back of his mind, forgotten about. He shook his head and turned the radio on, he needed something to take his mind off things. He began to sing along with the song that was playing but as the words registered with him, the song took on a whole new meaning:

And the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone but it goes to waste, could it be worse?

And high up above or down below

When you're too in love to let it go

But if you never try, you'll never know, just what you're worth.

Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones, and I will try to fix you.

Flynn smiled to himself and shook his head. Was someone trying to tell him something here? First, him and Aaron meet up again on a night when he wasn't even supposed to be in Bar West and now this song whose words were spot on. They described their situation perfectly. That was exactly what he had to do, try to fix Aaron. The problem was, how?

Aaron was walking down the road towards work when his phone rang. He saw Flynn's name on the screen and answered. "Alright" he said.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just checking to see if you're ok, you know, after…"

Aaron saw Hazel coming towards him. "Yeah look, I can't talk now, I'll speak to you later" and he ended the call.

"Morning love, how are ya?"

Aaron smiled at her. "Ok I guess, how about you?"

"You know, good days and bad same as you I suppose."

Aaron nodded his head.

"Anyway, I won't keep you, don't want Cain on me back for making you late, do I?"

"You don't want to be worrying about him. Me and him have got an understanding now."

Hazel raised her eyebrows as she saw Cain watching them.

"Oi, you! You haven't got time to be standing there chatting, get your backside over here now. These cars aren't gonna fix themselves you know."

"See, he barks the orders and I understand that I have to do what he says. I'll see you later."

"Yeah, see ya." Hazel smiled as Aaron walked around the corner into work.

"You can start on that one, it needs new spark plugs" Cain said.

"Alright, give me a minute to get me jacket off."

Cain watched as Aaron walked past him trying to decide from his face if today was going to be a good day or not. He couldn't be sure one way or the other at the moment. He'd just have to wait and see.

An hour or so later, Aaron's mobile rang. Cain looked up from under the bonnet of the car he was working on. Aaron took his phone out of his pocket, saw Flynn's name and refused the call. He couldn't talk to him here, not with Cain so close by. Ten minutes later, it beeped to tell him he had a message. He didn't need to look to know who it would be from. He read the message anyway: what happened earlier, are you ok?

He put the phone back in his pocket and carried on working.

"Someone's keen, a phone call and a message in the space of about ten minutes. Aren't you going to answer them?"

"I'm busy. I'll call them back later."

"Why not do it now?"

"Cos I told ya, I'm busy. Besides, you only want me to call them back so you can listen to what I'm saying."

"No I don't, believe me, my delicate little ears need protecting after some of the conversations I've heard from you in the past. Besides, I'm nipping back home for ten minutes. I forgot something so you'll be all by yourself for a while." He winked as he walked past.

Aaron waited until Cain was out of sight before calling Flynn. He answered straight away.

"Hi, it's me. Look, I'm sorry about this morning. Hazel came up to talk to me."

"Oh right, is that what it was." Aaron could hear the relief in Flynn's voice. "I thought maybe… oh look, it doesn't matter what I thought, how is she?"

"She's ok, good days and bad same as me but you don't need to worry, I'm fine."

"Are you sure, only, after last night…."

"Yeah, I know, sorry about that."

"Now look who keeps apologising" Flynn said. "Look, I'm just glad you're ok. I thought you might be, you know, embarrassed or something, not that you need to be or should be of course. Anyone would get upset at times if they were going through what you are."

"Flynn" Aaron laughed "I'm not embarrassed ok, just a bit surprised that's all. I wasn't expecting to burst into tears like that but it's not long since Jackson... well... you know so I suppose it's bound to happen every so often. I just wasn't expecting it to happen while I was with you. Besides, I thought real men are supposed to cry, aren't they?"

"So they say" Flynn replied "so what's your excuse? Anyway, as long as you're ok, that's all that matters and you can cry when you're with me any time. That's what I'm there for."

"I know. So, do you fancy that pool rematch, maybe one day next week?" Aaron asked.

"Sure, why not?"

"Ok then, I'll phone you next week and we'll get something sorted then."

"Great. Speak to you soon."

Cain watched his nephew put his phone back in his pocket and smile as he turned to start work again. He'd made sure he went just far enough round the corner to be out of Aaron's sight before turning to watch him. He was pleased to see that the conversation seemed to be a happy one. He'd thought maybe Aaron had had a fallout with Adam or Paddy or someone and that's why he didn't want to answer his phone but that didn't seem to be the case. He was pleased, Aaron didn't need any more aggro in his life at the moment. He walked back around the corner and back to the car he was working on.

"So, where is it then?" Aaron asked.

"Where's what?" Cain answered.

"Whatever it was you forgot that was so important you had to go home to get it straight away."

"Oh that, it wasn't as important as I thought it was. It can wait."

"Yeah, right, if you say so" Aaron laughed and turned back to his work.

Aaron and Flynn spoke the following week and arranged to meet in Bar West on the Thursday night. On the Wednesday before, just as he was finishing work, Aaron's phone rang. It was Flynn. "Alright, I wasn't expecting to hear from you. Everything ok?"

"I don't know, that depends on you. I've just had a call from an old mate of mine. He's up here for a couple of days and he wants to meet on Thursday night. It's the only night he's free. He goes home on Friday."

"Oh, right." Aaron tried to keep the disappointment out of his voice.

"So, if you don't mind, I thought he could join us."

"Well, if he's your mate, don't you want to see him on your own, I mean, you don't want me there."

" Look, we made plans first. If you don't want him to come along, I'll just tell him that it's too short notice and I'm busy. I haven't seen him in ages anyway, it's not like he's a really good friend."

Aaron sighed. "No, don't do that. Fine, bring him along but if he bores me, I'm not stopping, alright? I'll leave you two to it."

"Right. See you Thursday then."

Thursday evening and Aaron was dressed ready to go out. He looked at himself in the mirror. He looked the same on the outside but on the inside, he felt different. He couldn't put his finger on it. He sat on his bed and touched the silver chain he was wearing. I wish you were still here, Jackson, he thought. Everything was so right when it was just me and you. He rubbed the chain for a few minutes, lost in his private thoughts. Right, come on then he told himself, let's go and have fun.

Bar West was busy as it usually was on a Thursday night. Aaron pushed his way through the crowds looking for Flynn. He found him by the pool table talking with a tall, good looking blonde bloke.

"Alright" he said as he walked up to them. Flynn smiled at him. He had a funny look on his face, an expression Aaron wasn't sure about. He looked almost relieved. "Aaron, this is Harry, Harry, Aaron."

Harry held out his hand. "Nice to meet you, Aaron." Aaron shook his hand. "Yeah, you too."

"Right, I'll get the beers in" said Flynn "apart from you Harry, you're getting an orange juice, you've had enough for one night" and he disappeared through the crowd.

Aaron looked at Harry, not smiling. "So, you're a mate of Flynn's are you?"

"Yeah, that's right. We used to go to school together, before he moved up here. You've got nothing to worry about though, I'm not a threat."

"You what?" Aaron said.

"I'm not a threat, to you and Flynn so you can relax."

Aaron shrugged his shoulders. Who did this bloke think he was, I'm not a threat to you and Flynn, there is no him and Flynn. "Don't know what you're talking about, mate."

Harry grinned. "Look, I'm a straight lad, from Manchester, just visiting an old school friend. That's it."

"Yeah, so you said. Thanks for the information." Aaron looked away and shook his head.

"Anyway" Harry said "Flynn tells me you're a pretty decent pool player. I play a mean game of pool too. Fancy a game?" He started to put the balls on the table.

"Yeah, alright then, why not" Aaron said, still without smiling. At least then, he wouldn't have to try and talk to this prat any longer.

At that moment, Flynn arrived back. Harry grinned at him. "I was just telling Aaron that you said he was a pretty decent pool player. We're going to see if you were telling the truth or not aren't we Aaron?"

"Yeah, we are. So, what else has he been saying about me, then?" Aaron looked straight at Flynn.

"Calm down, nothing for you to worry about. Go on then, you break. Winner stays on."

Flynn was worried now. Watching Aaron's face, something had obviously wound him up. His jaw was set firm, his face had no trace of a smile like the last time they had been here. What had happened while he'd been at the bar? Harry lost the first game and handed his cue to Flynn. "I'm off to the gents" he said.

Flynn went straight up to Aaron. "What's wrong?"

Aaron shook his head. "Why don't you ask your straight friend, from Manchester."

"Has he said something?"

"You mean apart from telling me that he's no threat to me and you. What have you been telling him?"

"Nothing. I told him I was meeting a mate for a drink, that's it."

"So where did he get the idea that there was a me and you then?"

"I don't know, probably put two and two together and got five. It never came from me though. Aaron, I told you the other night, the reason I spoke to you was because you looked like you needed a friend. A friend, that's it."

Aaron looked at Flynn. He could see that he was telling the truth. He began to calm down. "Alright, alright, I believe you. You've got weird taste in friends though."

"Tell me about it, he never used to be like that. Besides, you've only just got here, I've had the pleasure of his company for a couple of hours. Still, he'll be gone soon."

Harry came rushing back over. "Flynn, mate, look I'm really sorry but I'm going to have to go, right now. I've just had a call from Lucy." He looked at Aaron "She's my girlfriend." Aaron raised his eyes up to the ceiling. "Anyway, apparently, there's some problem and she needs me so, you don't mind do you?"

"No, no, you do what you have to do."

"Cheers mate. We'll meet again soon, ok? Maybe you can come down to me next time?"

"Yeah, maybe" Flynn said.

"You can even bring Aaron if you want to." Aaron nearly choked on his mouthful of lager.

After he had gone, Flynn looked at Aaron. "Well, that's a bonus. I'm sorry, I had no idea he'd turned into such an idiot, until tonight that is."

Aaron smiled "Don't worry about it. Just make sure when I meet any more of your friends, they're a bit more likeable than him. Do you want another drink? I could certainly do with one."

"Yeah, please." Flynn smiled to himself as Aaron went to the bar. He wondered if Aaron had even noticed what he'd said, when I meet any more of your friends, not if. Maybe he was getting somewhere after all. They were two small words, when and if, but the difference in the meaning of those words was massive. Taking things slowly, putting his feelings to one side and doing everything he could to make Aaron feel comfortable seemed to be doing the trick. Aaron seemed happier which was good but he knew that, until Aaron spoke about Jackson properly, got everything out in the open, he would never be able to move forward. Now, it was up to him to try and get him to do just that. Should be a doddle, he thought.

The next couple of hours passed without incident, both of them relaxed again, enjoying just being together. They were sitting at a table next to each other with the last remains of a drink in front of them. Flynn looked at Aaron.

"What?" Aaron said.

"I was just thinking I'm glad it was Harry that went and you that stayed, not the other way round otherwise, I might have had to kill him." Aaron smiled. "Anyway, I better be off. Early start tomorrow."

He stood up to go.

"Hang on, I'll come with you." Aaron looked at his watch. "I should be able to get the last bus back."

They walked to the bus stop. They were the only ones there. They stood side by side both with their hands in their pockets. Aaron was suddenly aware of how good Flynn smelt. He hadn't noticed before, maybe because they hadn't been this close together apart from the other night when he had had other things on his mind. He smelt good, he looked good and... he shouldn't be thinking like this. He looked up to see his bus just coming down the road. "Right, looks like my lift's here." Flynn looked at him and smiled. Aaron smiled back. Their eyes stayed fixed on each other. Without even realising what he was doing, Aaron leant forward and kissed Flynn softly on the lips. It lasted a couple of seconds if that. He pulled back just as the bus pulled up. Aaron looked a little embarrassed."Right, I'll, er, I'll see ya then" he said as he got on the bus.

"Yeah, see ya" Flynn said.

After the bus had gone, Flynn stayed where he was. He shook his head. Aaron had done it to him again. Just when he thought he knew what Aaron would do, or definitely wouldn't do in this case, he went and did something that completely threw him, not that he was complaining. He left the bus stop and decided to walk to the taxi rank. Reality came back and bit him hard. Now what did he do? What sort of mood would Aaron be in when they next spoke? Was he already regretting kissing him? Would he try to blame it on the alcohol, say it was a mistake, it shouldn't have happened? How guilty would he now be feeling? All these thoughts were whirling around Flynn's head as he headed for a taxi and home.

Sitting on the bus, Aaron had his eyes closed as he leant his head sideways against the window. What had he just done? What was he thinking of? But that was the problem, he hadn't been thinking, something had just come over him. He'd wanted to kiss Flynn, it felt right but it was wrong. How could he kiss someone else who wasn't Jackson? What was he going to say to Flynn next time they met? He couldn't blame alcohol, he'd had a bit but not that much. He could always say it was a mistake, it shouldn't have happened but that would be a lie because he'd wanted it to happen, he must have done otherwise he wouldn't have done it. A solitary tear trickled down his cheek. Why did Jackson have to die? If he was still here, none of this would be happening. He would be with the man he loved, the only man he wanted to be with, not falling for someone else, something which seemed to be happening whether he wanted it to or not.


	5. Chapter 5

Hope I've done this part justice, you'll see why when you read it. Please let me know what you think and thank you for your kind comments so far.

* * *

><p>Flynn had been thinking. He knew that he had to get Aaron to open up to him, talk about Jackson, if Aaron was to ever move on and start to really live his life again. There had been moments when they were together where Aaron had relaxed, allowed himself to have some fun but Flynn knew that somewhere in his mind, thoughts of Jackson and guilt were never far away. He hoped if he got Aaron in the right place, somewhere he felt comfortable, he would now trust him enough to talk to him about Jackson and what had happened. It wouldn't be easy for Aaron, he knew that, but it wouldn't be easy for him either. He would have to listen to the guy he eventually wanted to be with speak about his boyfriend, the man he had left him to go back to, the man he so obviously was still in love with. Still, helping Aaron was his priority right now, nothing else mattered. Bar West wasn't the place to try and have such a difficult conversation. There were always too many people about, loud music playing, too many distractions. None of the other bars or pubs that he could think of would be any good either. He couldn't ask Aaron back to his place, he was nearly certain he would refuse, and if he did agree to come back, he would never feel comfortable enough to talk to him here. Suddenly, he had a thought. He knew the perfect place. He'd been to this place a few times, it was quiet, it was perfect. All he had to do was get Aaron there and hope that he could get him to talk.<p>

He decided that, when he spoke to Aaron, he wouldn't mention the kiss. He would just act as if nothing had happened, carry on as they had before. He didn't want to make a big thing about it, it was only one small kiss after all. Plus, if he didn't mention it, Aaron wouldn't have the chance to make an excuse for why it had happened. Flynn wanted to hang on to the belief for as long as possible that it had happened because they wanted it to. He didn't want Aaron to take that thought away from him. He phoned Aaron's number and waited for him to answer. He didn't have to wait long.

"Alright, how are you doing?" Aaron said.

"Yeah, fine thanks, you?"

"Yeah, good mate."

"Listen" Flynn said "Are you working on Saturday?"

"No, not this week, why?"

"I thought we might go out somewhere. Do something different."

"Oh right, what did you have in mind?"

"I'm keeping quiet about that, you'll just have to trust me. I'll drive, though"

" OK, well, do you want to pick me up?"

Flynn wasn't expecting that. He hadn't been back to the village since the night he'd been introduced to Jackson and he would never have suggested seeing Aaron there. It was way too soon, it wouldn't have been right.

"Do you want me to, I mean, I don't mind but if it's gonna be difficult for you, if you'd rather I stayed away.."

"No, it's fine. If you phone me when you get here, I'll come out to meet you. What time were you thinking?"

"How about 10.30?"

"Ok, see you Saturday then."

Aaron ended the call. He was glad that Flynn hadn't mentioned the kiss, that he sounded normal, like nothing had happened. He wondered what Flynn was up to. Where could they be going that Flynn would have to drive? Oh well, he'd just have to wait and see.

Saturday morning dawned bright and sunny. Aaron wondered what today would bring. He had no idea where he and Flynn were going, what they would be doing and he felt a little bit nervous. Still, he tried to comfort himself with the thought that whatever it was couldn't be that bad, could it? He dressed in a t-shirt and jeans and went downstairs to get some breakfast. Paddy must have been out somewhere because he had the house to himself. He was glad, he wasn't ready to tell anyone about meeting up with Flynn again, besides, there was nothing to tell, yet. He finished his breakfast and went back upstairs to finish getting ready and get his phone. When he came back downstairs, Paddy was sitting at the table. Aaron walked past to get his keys.

"Hey, check you out. Looking good, and is that aftershave I can smell too?" Aaron pulled a face at him but said nothing. He grabbed his keys just as his phone rang. He answered it. "Alright. Yeah, I'm just on my way out. See you in a bit."

He turned to see Paddy grinning at him. "What?" he said.

"Nothing, just not used to seeing you in jeans in the daytime. They usually only come out at night like vampires and werewolves."

"You're so not funny. See you later."

"Yeah, see you later. Have a good time."

Aaron punched him on the arm as he went past. "Yeah, I will."

Paddy smiled to himself. Something was going on, Aaron had actually looked almost like his old self again. He knew better than to ask, Aaron would tell him when he was ready and that was fine by him.

Aaron closed the door and saw Flynn's car parked not far away from the house. He got in and Flynn smiled at him. "So, do you think you made it without being seen then or would you like me to drive off really fast, screeching the tyres and everything just to be sure."

"Yeah, yeah, very funny cos screeching tyres wouldn't attract any attention at all would they? So where are you taking me exactly?"

"Told you, you'll just have to wait and see. Trust me" Flynn said as he drove off. Aaron smiled at him. Normally he would have hated this, not being in control but, for some reason he couldn't explain, he did trust Flynn so he tried not to worry. He turned to watch the world go by his window. They chatted about nothing in particular, both enjoying just being together. "Are we there yet?" Aaron said after about ten minutes. Flynn shook his head. "Are we there yet?" Aaron said again a few minutes later. Flynn glanced over at him. "If you're going to start that, you can get out right now."

"You wouldn't do that, you like my company too much." Aaron grinned at him.

"Oh, do I, well I'm glad you told me, I'd never have known otherwise." Flynn grinned back at him. "And you being here has nothing to do with you liking my company does it?"

"Just shut up and drive" Aaron replied but Flynn had seen the redness that had appeared briefly on his cheeks. That told him all he needed to know right now.

A few minutes later and Flynn signalled to turn off the road. As far as Aaron could see, they were in the middle of nowhere although there did seem to be a sort of car park containing a few cars that they were pulling into. "Where exactly are we?" Aaron asked.

Flynn sighed. "It's called a country park. I thought the fresh air and a change of scenery would do us both good. Get me away from home for a few hours and you away from the village. We only ever get to see the inside of Bar West and it's too nice a day to be stuck indoors."

Aaron couldn't argue with that, it was a really beautiful day. For the first time that day, he noticed how fit Flynn looked, his tanned, toned body shown to perfection in his tight t shirt. Aaron shook his head. "You are kidding, right?"

"No, I'm not. I used to come here a lot. It'll be nice to stretch our legs. There's some great walks through the woods."

"Through the woods? How do I know we won't get lost."

"Because, I passed every badge I took while I was in the scouts including woodland walking."

Aaron laughed. "You were in the scouts?"

"Yeah, why, weren't you?"

"No, don't be stupid."

"Oh well, you won't think it's so stupid when I can find my way around this place and you can't will you?"

He opened the car door and got out. Aaron shook his head again and followed him. Well this hadn't been what he was expecting but it felt nice being out here, just him and Flynn. It was peaceful. They began to walk down a path into the woodland.

"So, you said you used to come here a lot " Aaron said. "Why was that then?"

"I used to come here to think. If I had a problem, I'd come here and it always seemed to help me think clearer. Before I came out, I walked around here a lot. Trying to figure out what I was going to say, going through all the likely reactions in my head and how I'd handle them. Turned out I had nothing to worry about, everyone was fine about it, but I didn't know that at the time."

As they walked along, side by side, Aaron could feel the last remaining bits of tension in his shoulders disappearing. He didn't know if it was being out here away from everything or being with Flynn or a mixture of the two but he felt good.

"Plus, me and Matt used to come here a lot too."

"Matt?" Aaron asked. He'd never thought about Flynn having had a boyfriend before.

"Yeah, he's my ex. We used to come here if we wanted time on our own. Both of us lived at home so it was difficult to get time alone together."

"You didn't did you? Not in the woods?" Aaron looked horrified.

Flynn winked at him. "Hey, don't knock it til you've tried it."

"Please tell me you're joking."

Flynn couldn't keep a straight face any longer, and laughing nudged Aaron's arm with his. "Course I'm joking. What sort of person do you think I am exactly? What I meant was, it was difficult for us to find somewhere we could talk. At my house or his, there was always other people about or the chance of someone walking in so we used to come here."

They walked through and out into a clearing where there were a few picnic tables and a few benches.

"So, what happened, you said he was an ex." Aaron didn't know why he was suddenly so interested but he was. "We just kept arguing, you know, the usual stuff. One day, we were here, we had a massive row and that was it, over."

"I'm sorry" Aaron said, taking a seat on one of the benches.

"Don't be, it was my decision. I just knew it wasn't what I wanted anymore." Flynn sat down next to him

"When did this happen?"

"Just before Christmas."

"Bet that car journey home was fun" Aaron laughed.

"I survived" Flynn said smiling back at him.

They both sat there in silence, basking in the sunshine. Aaron turned to look at Flynn. "I know what you're doing you know, you're about as subtle as a sledgehammer."

"Sorry?" Flynn said.

"You, bringing me here, telling me what a great place it is to come and talk. How it helped you to think." His voice went quieter. "You want me to talk about Jackson."

Flynn smiled at him. "Yeah well, subtlety was never my strong point."

Aaron smiled back at him. "Look, I know you're trying to help, and I really appreciate it, I do, but I don't need to talk about him. I'm getting through this by myself and I'm coping."

Flynn shook his head. "No, you're not Aaron, not really. You need to talk about him, about what happened because, until you do, it'll just fester away inside you."

Aaron shook his head. He looked at Flynn's face, serious and full of concern.

"Even if I wanted to talk about him, I wouldn't know where to start."

Flynn looked into Aaron's eyes. "Wherever you feel comfortable" he said.

Comfortable, there was a word that Aaron never associated with talking, especially about his thoughts, his feelings, but for some reason, he felt comfortable with Flynn. Maybe he was right, maybe he did need to talk, maybe it would help but that was a lot of maybes. What if it just made him feel worse, what if he couldn't handle talking about what had happened?

Flynn hardly dared breathe. Was Aaron actually going to open up and talk to him? He hadn't said no, he hadn't walked away, not yet anyway.

Aaron shook his head and moved his eyes away from Flynn, staring straight ahead of him. His hand went up to the chain he wore and he rubbed it between his fingers and thumb. Flynn hadn't noticed that Aaron wore a chain before, he was surprised. He didn't have Aaron down as a jewellery person. He watched as Aaron appeared to be trying to decide what to do next. He watched as Aaron took a deep breath and, keeping his eyes looking straight ahead of him began to speak in a quiet voice.

"When me and Jackson got back together again, I was so happy, we were both happy. It was what we both wanted more than anything, to be together, to try and have as normal a life as possible. We'd tried being apart and it hadn't worked, it just made us both miserable. We belonged together."

Flynn turned his body so he was facing Aaron and put his head down. He couldn't look at Aaron while he was talking so he looked at his lap and just listened.

"Things were great for a while. Then, they started to go downhill. Jackson got more and more depressed, frustrated that he couldn't do what he wanted to do anymore. He, er, he started keeping a video diary. He wouldn't talk to me, or his mum, he wouldn't talk to anyone but he'd talk to that thing no problem. It used to drive me mad. I was his boyfriend, he should have been talking to me but, whenever I suggested it, he wouldn't do it, he just kept making excuses." Aaron cleared his throat. "Anyway, one day, when he was at a hospital appointment, I went to the house and his laptop was there. I knew something was wrong and it was doing my head in not knowing, knowing he wouldn't tell me, so I switched it on and had a look at his video diary." The tears were coming now, one trickling down his cheek as he spoke. He wiped it away before carrying on.

"What I found was the worst thing I ever had to sit through. He, er, he spoke about how bad his life was and, how he'd had enough and that he wanted to…. to kill himself."

Flynn looked up. Had Aaron just said that Jackson had wanted to kill himself? No, he must have heard wrong.

"I had to sit and watch my boyfriend, the man I loved and wanted so badly say that he wanted to die."

Aaron put his head in his hands and sobbed. Flynn was genuinely speechless. He didn't know what he had been expecting to hear but it wasn't this. He didn't know what to say but he knew what to do. He reached out, put his arms around Aaron and pulled him towards him. He said nothing, letting Aaron cry just like before except this time, it was slightly different. Where before tears fell from only one pair of eyes, today they fell from two. Flynn's silent tears fell as he held Aaron. He couldn't help himself. He'd never heard anything so utterly heartbreaking in his life before. What Aaron and Jackson must have gone through he couldn't imagine. The second thing that was different was Aaron's arms. They weren't by his side today, they were around Flynn, holding tightly, like his life depended on being anchored to him.

Flynn composed himself first. He was supposed to be helping Aaron, getting him through this somehow. He couldn't let Aaron see that he'd been crying too. Aaron pulled back out of the hug. He wiped his eyes and looked at Flynn. He'd thought he might want to stop now but he didn't. He just wanted to get this over with, get it all out of his system.

"Aaron, I don't know what to say."

"Then, don't say anything, just let me carry on before I lose my nerve, ok."

Flynn nodded. "Whatever you want mate."

Aaron took a deep breath. Flynn reached out and took Aaron's hand in his. He gave it a gentle squeeze and was about to let go but Aaron held it tightly.

" I then had to tell his mum. She didn't believe me at first but after she'd watched it, she knew I wasn't lying. We told him we knew what he was thinking of doing but it was like he didn't care. We tried everything to get him to change his mind. I tried so hard, taking him out just me and him, spending time just the two of us, trying to show him that we could have a good life together if he'd let us. We even went on holiday but when we came back, nothing had changed. I felt so useless. He was supposed to love me the way I loved him but I wasn't enough to make him want to carry on living. Whatever I did would never be enough to get him to change his mind. Then, one day, it got changed for him."

Flynn's heart was torn in two listening to Aaron. It was hard listening to what he had been through but, hearing Aaron talk about how he felt about Jackson was just as hard.

"Hazel phoned me at work to say that Jackson had been taken into hospital. He'd got a really bad chest infection and was having breathing problems. I rushed over there as quickly as I could. They tried treating it, like they had before, but it didn't seem to be working. The next morning, they told us that it was looking likely that he wouldn't get over this one. His body was too weak to fight it. Hazel was a mess so I knew I had to stay strong, for her sake. We used to take it in turns to sit with him so the other one could try and get some sleep or something to eat. When I was with him, I used to watch his chest, making sure it was going up and down, that he was still breathing. One night, it went up and down but then, it never went up again. He was gone." Aaron was crying again.

"I'm so sorry, mate. I really am" Flynn said. He would have done anything right there and then to take away even a little bit of the pain that Aaron was going through but he couldn't. He had wanted Aaron to talk to him and he had done. He never expected him to tell him so much, not in one go. He was so proud of him, for Aaron to have talked to him like that took a lot of guts.

A few minutes later, Aaron stopped crying. He felt like crap but, in a weird way, he sort of felt better too. He hadn't meant to say so much but, once he started, he couldn't seem to stop. It was like a dam had burst and all these words had to come out. He looked down to see his hand and Flynn's still joined together. He didn't want to let go so he didn't. He looked at Flynn and half smiled.

"So, now you know" he said, his voice barely a whisper.

"Yeah, I do and I don't know about you but I could do with a drink. There's a pub not far away, do you fancy it or we could just go back home, whatever you want to do is fine by me."

"Actually a drink would be good. Don't suppose they do food do they?"

"No idea, one way to find out."

Flynn stood up and pulled Aaron up off the bench. Aaron let go of his hand as soon as he was standing and they started walking back the way they had come. They walked in silence, a comfortable silence each lost in their own thoughts. They both knew that today, something massive had happened between them but where they went from here, neither of them knew.


	6. Chapter 6

**This is based on something that happened to me once.**

* * *

><p>Aaron had been awake for about ten minutes or so but he was thinking. He had slept like a baby, not sure if it was down to the fresh air or to the more relaxed frame of mind he came home in. That chat with Flynn yesterday had definitely helped, he felt like a weight had been lifted. He'd been carrying that burden on his own for too long, he knew he'd made the right decision when he had decided to speak to Flynn about Jackson and what had happened to him. He'd thought he would have found it difficult, awkward, embarrassing even and to start with it was but, once he got started, it was easier than he'd thought it would be. No, what happened yesterday wasn't a problem, what had happened this morning was. Usually when he woke up, one of his first thoughts was always of Jackson. This morning when he woke up, it had been Flynn he'd thought about and this bothered him. He closed his eyes and tried to empty his mind to see what thoughts if any would appear. A face appeared, a kind face with a lovely smile and straight brown hair. Flynn again. Aaron opened his eyes and sighed. Why couldn't he picture Jackson like he used to? What if he woke up one morning and couldn't picture him at all? Was this normal, did this usually happen? All he had were questions when all he wanted were answers.<p>

Flynn had decided to give Aaron some space. It had been a big thing, Aaron opening up and talking to him the way he had and he knew it would take Aaron a while to get his head round it all. He was pretty confident that when he was ready, Aaron would get in touch with him and this he did a few days later. He phoned for a chat and everything was good between them.

Aaron's life had taken on a new routine now. He worked, went to the pub, spent time with Paddy and Adam and, once or twice a week would meet up with Flynn. It was a good balance that seemed to suit him, at least for now. He knew, however, that the lines between his two lives were becoming blurred and how long he could keep them separate, how long he wanted to keep them separate, he didn't know.

On his way to work one morning, Aaron felt a bit rough. His throat was like sandpaper and his ear ached. By mid morning, he had a temperature too and Cain sent him to the doctors. By lunchtime, he was back home, in bed, with a course of antibiotics to take. It was only tonsillitis, it wouldn't kill him but he hated being ill, he was a terrible patient. He texted Flynn to let him know that he was ill. Over the next few days, they sent each other messages and spoke a couple of times too. He wasn't bedridden but the boredom was killing him. By the time he'd taken his last tablet, he was crawling the walls and ready for a night out. He phoned Flynn and they arranged to meet the following night, usual place, usual time which meant Bar West at 7.30.

Aaron arrived first and went to the bar. He was looking forward to seeing Flynn again, he'd missed him. He hadn't wanted to admit it to himself but it was the truth. He wondered whether Flynn had missed him too. He had just ordered their drinks when he felt a hand rest on his shoulder, then trail off down his back. He turned to see Flynn standing next to him, smiling. If his smile was anything to go by, he was as pleased to see Aaron as Aaron was to see him.

"Alright, so, how's the patient then?" he said.

"Better than I was. I'll be better still when I've got a couple of these inside me" Aaron said handing a bottle to Flynn.

"Yeah well, just go steady. You're a lightweight at the best of times."

Aaron pulled a face. "Listen mate, if I was feeling 100%, I'd show you exactly who's a lightweight but, as I'm not, you don't need to worry. I'll be a good boy."

"Shame." Flynn said with a raised eyebrow.

Aaron blushed and smiled. They moved away from the bar, sitting down at a table, this time next to each other. They drank, talked and enjoyed just being together. Every so often, their legs would touch but neither of them minded. They'd just finished their third drink when Flynn noticed something was wrong with Aaron. He seemed to be having trouble concentrating and kept staring off into space. Flynn had to say things two or three times before Aaron could answer. "It's my round isn't it?" Aaron said. He went to stand up and nearly fell over, Flynn had to grab him. If he didn't know better, he'd swear Aaron had been drugged but that was impossible. They'd only left the table to go and get drinks and the drinks were never out of their sight. Suddenly, he had a thought.

"Aaron, when did you take your last tablet?"

"Er, yesterday I think, yeah, yesterday evening."

"You prat. They take 48 hours to get into your system and 48 hours to leave it again. You shouldn't have been drinking at all tonight."

"Oh, woops" Aaron said. He put his head down on the table, it suddenly felt really heavy.

Now what was Flynn supposed to do? He'd left his car at home so there was no way he could drive Aaron home or go in a taxi with him, Aaron would go berserk if Flynn took him back to the village. He couldn't put him in a taxi on his own either, he had no guarantee Aaron would get there safely. That only left one option, he'd have to bring him back to his house. Luckily, he had the place to himself. He sighed. "Come on, let's get you out of here."

Aaron could walk ok just not very quickly. He felt like he was walking through treacle. He was aware of Flynn holding onto his arm but his head felt too weird for him to worry about it. Flynn and Aaron got into a taxi. The driver turned around. "If he gets sick in here, I hope you've got enough money to pay the fine."

"He won't be sick, ok, he's not drunk."

Flynn told the driver his address and sat back. They arrived at Flynn's place about ten minutes later. He paid the driver and they went in.

"Aaron, Aaron mate" Flynn called him.

Through the fog that was filling his head, Aaron turned to look at Flynn.

"You need to get upstairs and sleep this off. Can you manage?"

Aaron nodded and made his way slowly upstairs, Flynn following behind. When they got to the top, Flynn nodded towards a door. "In there" he said. Aaron trudged the few steps into Flynn's room and virtually fell onto the double bed.

"I'll be back in a minute, I'll just go and get you some water."

When he came back, Aaron was out for the count. Great he thought. He put the water down on the bedside table and took Aaron's shoes and socks off. His hands were shaking as he opened the belt holding Aaron's jeans up. He opened the button and zip and pulled them down from the ankles. Aaron stirred but didn't wake up. Now for the tricky bit, Aaron's t-shirt. He was tempted to leave it but Aaron was sweating so it had to come off. His eyes were drawn to the silver chain Aaron wore. He'd have to ask him about it one day, Aaron didn't wear any other jewellery except a watch so this obviously meant something to him.

He stood up and looked down at Aaron taking in every inch of what he could see. He could feel himself blushing. Aaron really was gorgeous, he liked everything about him. He smiled to himself. Recently, he'd been thinking of Aaron lying in his bed and now here he was, just where he wanted him except when he thought about it, Aaron wasn't unconscious. He tried not to think about him and Aaron together but he couldn't help it. He knew he'd said he wanted to be a friend to him but he was finding it more and more difficult to ignore his true feelings. He really liked Aaron and he knew Aaron liked him too, he could tell, it was just too soon. As far as Flynn was concerned, it was a case of right person, wrong time, again. He would just have to be patient and hope that one day it would happen for them. He bent over and placed a gentle kiss on Aaron's lips. "See you in the morning" he whispered. He took Aaron's phone out of his jeans and pretending to be him sent a text to Paddy saying that he wouldn't be home. For the next half hour or so, he sat on the bottom of his bed, watching Aaron, making sure he was ok. When he was sure everything was alright, he took himself off to the spare room and the single bed that was in there.

Aaron opened his eyes the next morning and looked around the room. It was sort of familiar but unfamiliar at the same time. He had another look around. Then he remembered, this was Flynn's room. He'd seen it only once before when he'd hardly moved from the doorway. Moving his eyes was painful, moving his head was agony. He tried to remember last night. He remembered meeting Flynn, having a few drinks and then, nothing. What had happened? He looked down at his bare chest and groaned. Oh no, we didn't did we? Surely I would have remembered that he thought. He was terrified to look under the duvet. He took a deep breath and lifted it up. Relief flooded through him as he saw he was still wearing his boxer shorts. That was a good sign. He sat up carefully and looked for his clothes hearing music coming from downstairs as he did so. They were in a pile on the floor so he got dressed and stood up. Time to face the music, literally.

Flynn was sitting at the table in the kitchen. He'd checked on Aaron when he got up and left him sleeping. He heard Aaron coming downstairs and looked up just as Aaron walked through the doorway. He smiled. "Well, look who it is, Sleeping Beauty" he said. Aaron flopped onto a chair and rubbed his eyes. Flynn got up, opened a drawer and took out a box of paracetamol. He put them on the table in front of Aaron along with a glass of water.

"God, I feel rough. How much did I have exactly?"

"Not that much."

"So how come I feel like this then and I can't remember anything."

"Maybe because that's what happens when you mix antibiotics with alcohol."

Aaron frowned, Flynn just shook his head. "I'll explain it to you when you're a bit more with it. Do you want something to eat?"

"Yeah, toast would be good" Aaron said as he swallowed the paracetamol. Flynn stood up to get the bread. Aaron looked at his back. It was no good, he was going to have to ask him. He was pretty sure that nothing had happened between them but that didn't mean that they hadn't slept in the same bed and if they had, he needed to know. He wished he could remember but he couldn't so the only way to know for definite was to ask.

"Flynn, you know last night" he said in a quiet voice" well, did we, er, did anything happen you know between, between me and you that I should know about?"

Standing with his back to Aaron, Flynn smiled broadly. He was tempted to wind Aaron up a bit but that would be too cruel especially in this case. If it had just been too much alcohol, then maybe. He turned round to face Aaron who was looking at the table.

"No, nothing happened. I was the perfect gentleman, as always. I even slept in the spare room."

Aaron looked up at him, relief written all over his face. "Oh, right, I, I see."

"So, you can relax, ok? If I spend the night with someone, I generally like them to be conscious, at least for some of the time."

Aaron blushed. "Right, I'll remember that."

"Make sure you do. Oh, and before I forget, I sent Paddy a text from your phone last night so he wouldn't worry."

"Seems like you thought of everything."

"Yeah well, I try but I don't do this for just anyone you know."

"No, I know. Thank you." Aaron flashed a warm smile at Flynn.

"No problem but you do owe me a decent night out, alright" Flynn smiled back at him.

"I'll see what I can do" Aaron said.

Right now, he felt like he owed Flynn a hell of a lot more than just a decent night out.


	7. Chapter 7

**Thank you for your kind comments, I really do appreciate it.**

Aaron was sitting at home waiting for Flynn to come and pick him up. It was a glorious sunny day, it was going to be a scorcher later. Aaron was wearing a t-shirt and jeans with sunglasses dangling from the neck of his t-shirt, pulling it down just enough to catch a glimpse of the silver chain he always wore now and never took off. He never wore shorts, no matter how hot it was, shorts were what you wore for playing football or rugby. As far he was concerned, they weren't proper clothes. Jackson had always said it was because he had legs like two matchsticks and it was better for the world if they stayed covered up. He smiled to himself. He could think of little things like that about Jackson now without getting upset. Paddy said it was a good thing, it meant he was moving on, it was what was supposed to happen and he supposed it was a good thing but he still felt a little bit guilty about being happy, continuing with his life, enjoying a beautiful day like today when Jackson couldn't.

He and Flynn had made their usual arrangement, Flynn would phone when he was close by and Aaron would go out to meet him. It gave Aaron some time to think. He still owed Flynn a decent night out for looking after him a couple of weeks ago. He wanted something a bit different to just going to Bar West but not anything that was too much like a date. He was starting to acknowledge to himself that he liked Flynn, denying it was no good. He'd learned the hard way what denying things did to him and to other people but he wasn't ready yet to allow himself to think about Flynn in that way, it was still too soon. He made his way downstairs just as the post came through the letterbox. He picked up the solitary letter and saw it was addressed to him. He had no idea what it could be, he never got letters. He opened it and found two tickets inside. His good mood went a little flat momentarily. He'd forgotten all about these. Jackson had been banging on about some new band he'd heard of and how good they were supposed to be so, when Aaron had heard they were touring, he'd got them two tickets. He hadn't told Jackson, he was going to surprise him. He walked back upstairs thinking. It seemed a shame to waste them especially as they were paid for and he did owe Flynn that decent night out but they were supposed to be for him and Jackson so it would be wrong for him to take someone else wouldn't it? He put them in a drawer. He'd think about it and see how he felt later. His mobile rang announcing Flynn's arrival so he grabbed his keys and wallet and set off.

Flynn sat in the car waiting for Aaron with a smile on his face. When they had arranged to meet, he'd told Aaron he could choose where they went. He was glad he was sitting down other wise he would have fallen down because Aaron had said he wanted to go back to the country park. Who'd have thought it eh? His thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the passenger door being opened and Aaron getting in, sunglasses on now. Flynn couldn't believe how good he looked. He was glad he was wearing his own sunglasses as they hid his eyes which he knew would betray what he was thinking. They smiled at each other and set off. They stopped on the way to get some beers and before they knew it, they were there. They got out of the car, Aaron carrying the bag containing the beers and as Flynn was locking it, Aaron stole a glance at him and liked what he saw. He was wearing a T shirt and long baggy shorts, his legs more muscular than he'd thought they would be.

They walked off towards the same path they'd walked down before, walking side by side.

"You're full of surprises aren't you?" Flynn said.

"Am I?"

"Yeah, when I said you could pick where we went, this was the last place I thought you'd choose."

"Aah well, I don't want to be too predictable now do I?"

Flynn laughed. "I don't think there's any danger of that happening."

"And just what are you trying to say?" Aaron smiled.

"Me, nothing, nothing at all."

Aaron nudged his arm against Flynn's as they carried on walking. Flynn felt it but wasn't sure if it was accidental or not. He hoped not. They were walking through the trees, enjoying the sunshine and each other's company when something totally unexpected happened.

"Jackson would have loved this, he loved being outdoors especially when the weather was good. He used to say that what he'd really like would be to earn enough money to not have to work during the horrible weather and for us to spend those months abroad."

Aaron stopped dead in his tracks. Oh, god, had he really said that out loud, where had that come from? He turned his head slowly to look at Flynn, wondering what he would see.

Flynn smiled at him "Sounds like a good idea to me. Work most of the year and then have a few months in the sun while everyone else is freezing in the cold."

Aaron just stared at him.

"Aaron, it's fine, stop looking so worried. It's ok to talk about him, I told you that. You can't just pretend that he didn't exist and I don't want you to."

"I know, it just seems a bit…"

"Yeah, I know but I want you to be able to say whatever you need to without worrying. If you're constantly thinking you can't say things, can't talk about him or your memories you'll never be able to fully relax. Plus, it'll just make things awkward between us and I don't want that." He smiled reassuringly at Aaron.

Aaron nodded his head and smiled. "What did I do to deserve him" he thought.

"Come on, let's find somewhere to sit and we can have one of those beers." Flynn set off knowing Aaron wouldn't be far behind him.

They found a little clearing and sat down on the grass. Aaron took out the bottles of beer. "How are we supposed to open these exactly?" he asked.

"Told you, I used to be in the scouts remember. Be prepared and all that."

"Don't tell me you've got a bottle opener."

Flynn put his hand in his pocket and took out a bottle opener. "Ta da" he said.

"No way, you could not have known that we would need one of those. It was my idea to stop and get the beer."

Flynn laughed. "Alright, I admit it, I had it in the car already. Don't ask, it's a long story so I just grabbed it before we left."

Aaron laughed and shook his head. "What are you like?"

"Just under six feet tall, brown hair…"

"Ha ha very funny. Here, just open a couple of these will you."

They drank their beer and sat enjoying the sunshine. Aaron couldn't believe how comfortable he felt with Flynn, how relaxed he made him feel. He loved the banter they shared. Flynn loved being with Aaron, he was so different already to the devastated guy he'd met a few months ago. It was good to hear Aaron laugh and see him smile.

"Well, I don't know about you but I'm going to sunbathe for a bit and let the world go by" Flynn said, removing his t-shirt. "Are you going to join me?"

Aaron looked over at Flynn sitting topless next to him. The view from where he was sitting had suddenly got very interesting. Flynn was very well toned and, to Aaron's surprise, had a tattoo on the left side of his chest. It looked like a butterfly. Most peoples tattoos had stories behind them, he wondered what Flynn's story was.

"Yeah, why not" he said removing his own t shirt. Flynn looked at him enjoying the sight of Aaron topless again. He noticed the chain, what was the story behind that?

They both lay back on the grass just enjoying the feel of the sun on their bodies. Aaron was lying still but his mind was working overtime. He thought about the tickets that had arrived this morning. He was arguing with himself about whether to ask Flynn if he'd like to go with him. After a few minutes, he decided he would.

"Flynn, you know you said that I owed you a decent night out."

"Yeah, and don't think you're getting away with it either."

"Don't worry, I'm not trying to. I've got these tickets to see a band and I wondered if you wanted to come with me."

Flynn propped himself up on his elbows and looked at Aaron. "Yeah, sounds great as long as the band isn't Take That."

Aaron sat bolt upright. "Take That, do I look like I'd go to a Take That concert."

"Yeah, I can just picture you screaming along with everyone else, Howard I love you."

"I don't think so, besides, they're all old enough to be my dad."

"Oh, right, so if you prefer younger models, it must be West Life then. So, come on, which one's your favourite?"

"I don't have a favourite, I can't believe I asked you a perfectly serious question and we're now talking about West Life."

Flynn laughed. "Ok, as long as it's not Take That or West Life, count me in."

He smiled and Aaron smiled back. His eyes were drawn to Flynn's tattoo. Flynn saw him looking and waited for Aaron to say something.

"I didn't know you had a tattoo."

"Well, that's because you've never seen me with my top off before."

"So, is there a story behind it?"

Flynn sat up and turned slightly to face Aaron. He looked serious for a minute and took a deep breath.

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"No, I don't mind. Besides, I'm the one who's always saying to you that you should talk so I should take my own advice. I had it done after my Nan died. We were really close. We were sitting in her garden one day and a butterfly landed on some flowers. She smiled and said there goes another one. I didn't understand what she was going on about. She told me that she believed that butterflies represented the souls of people who had died, that they had finally been set free, free to go wherever they want. When she died, I wanted something to remember her by and so I had this done. I know it sounds daft but believing it made her happy."

Aaron had been watching Flynn closely. He cleared his throat. "No, it doesn't sound daft. It sounds like a really nice theory and if it kept her happy, then I don't see a problem."

"So, while we're confessing things, your chain. I never had you down as a jewellery wearing person so there must be a story behind it."

Aaron put his hand up to touch it, rub it between his fingers and thumb.

"Yeah, there is. It was Jackson's. Hazel gave it to me when he died. She said that she knew I probably wouldn't wear it but she wanted me to have something physical to remember him by. I got her to put it on and I've never taken it off since that day and I never will."

Flynn nodded. "Looks like we've both got reminders of special people then, doesn't it?"

Although the sun was beating down, they both felt a shiver run through them. Flynn reached for his t-shirt at the same time as Aaron did. They put them on. This place had done it again, got them both to speak this time. Aware that the mood had darkened and not wanting the rest of their day to be ruined, Flynn said "Well, I think I've had enough fresh air for one day and I feel like giving you a thrashing at pool so shall we head back?"

Aaron stood up and held out his hand to Flynn to pull him up. Flynn took it and let Aaron help him stand.

"Yeah alright but it won't be me that gets thrashed you know that don't you?" Aaron said

"Well, we'll see about that, won't we?"

They walked back to the car, teasing each other about how bad the other person was at pool and who was going to have to buy the most drinks as a forfeit for losing. When they reached the car, Flynn separated from Aaron to walk around to the drivers side. Aaron put his hand on his arm to stop him. Flynn turned, a puzzled look on his face. Aaron said nothing, just put his arms around Flynn and pulled him close to hug him. Flynn put his arms around Aaron and held him too. Aaron pulled back, smiled and went to get in the car.

"What was that for, not that I'm complaining?" Flynn asked

Aaron smiled at him. "Just because."

Flynn smiled back at him.

Were they finally getting somewhere? Were some of Aaron's barriers finally being broken down? He guessed only time would tell.


	8. Chapter 8

The concert had been fantastic. Jackson had been right, again, they were a good band and Aaron and Flynn had had a great time. It had been so hot in there with all those people crammed into a confined space that it was nice to now be out in the fresh air again. They walked side by side slowly through the streets enjoying the summer night, chatting away contentedly, their bodies occasionally brushing against each other as they headed towards Bar West. They had left the concert saying that they would go for just one drink, that would leave Aaron time to get the last bus home. Now, as they walked, neither of them rushed, neither of them wanted it to be just one drink, they wanted the evening to carry on for as long as possible.

Aaron pulled open the door to Bar West and stood back to let Flynn go through first. "After you."

"Thank you." Flynn said. "Since when did you become so well mannered?"

Aaron smiled. It had nothing to do with him being well mannered, it was just another opportunity for him to check Flynn out without being seen. He was finding himself more and more attracted to Flynn and was struggling to get his head round it. He genuinely had not been expecting to feel like this ever again. When they had bumped into each other that night it was the last thing on his mind. Back then, Jackson was all he thought about morning, noon and night and the thought that he would find himself attracted to someone else and would want to spend time with them just never entered his head. It would never happen, he wouldn't let it happen. Jackson had been the one for him, the only one for him, he wasn't interested in anyone else. Yet here he was, six, seven months later and he **_was_** interested in someone else. It made him feel uncomfortable, uneasy, disloyal too but, at the same time he couldn't ignore it. He'd been trying and he just couldn't. Being with Flynn made him happier but knowing that Flynn liked him too didn't make things easy. The way he looked at him sometimes did nothing to stop Aaron's growing feelings for him as he knew Flynn felt the same way about him. This was just typical of him and his life, nothing was ever straightforward.

They had to fight their way to the bar, it seemed like every resident had decided it was such a nice evening, they would all come out for a drink and they'd all ended up here. It was really noisy as well so there was no point trying to speak to each other until they could try to find somewhere quieter. Aaron heard a voice say "Yes mate, what can I get you?" He turned around to order their drinks only to find himself looking into the face of "their" barman, his and Jackson's. His expression changed and Flynn noticed. "Hello, haven't seen you for ages, nice to see you out and about again. So, what'll it be?"

"Er, two bottles of lager please."

The barman turned to fetch the drinks. Aaron was obviously uncomfortable but Flynn couldn't think of a reason why he should be. He hoped whatever it was wasn't going to spoil the rest of their night. The barman put the two bottles on the bar and Aaron handed over the money. He shook his head and leant forward so he wouldn't have to shout. "Keep it, mate. Have these on me. I heard about your boyfriend, I'm really sorry. Don't suppose that helps though does it?"

Aaron smiled a little smile and put the money back in his pocket. "Not really but cheers anyway pal" he said. He picked up the two bottles, handed one to Flynn and walked off without a word, knowing Flynn would follow him.

They made their way towards the back of the bar where it was usually a bit quieter. There was nowhere to sit so they stood leaning against a wall facing each other sipping their lager. It was so loud that they had to put their mouths virtually in the other one's ear to be able to hear what was being said.

"What was that all about, you and the barman and getting free drinks?" Flynn asked. The warmth of his breath against Aaron's neck and face as he spoke to him felt good, very good. Aaron was momentarily distracted but soon recovered. He sighed and explained what had happened that first time with him and Jackson and what had happened every time since.

"Great, so whenever he's working, you can go and get the first round in then" Flynn said grinning.

"I wouldn't get your hopes up. I think this'll be the last time. I think he had a soft spot for Jackson."

The smell of Aaron's aftershave filled Flynn's nostrils as Aaron had leant in to speak to him. He smelt lovely and Flynn's breath caught in his throat at how close they had to be to each other to have this conversation.

"Well, Jackson's not here and you still got your free drinks so maybe it's you he secretly likes."

It was only after he had spoken that Flynn realised what he had said. He silently kicked himself for being so tactless. He looked into Aaron's eyes to see what reaction might be coming his way. Aaron was staring off into space but then, he seemed to refocus and smiling said to Flynn, "Well, if it is me, you can't really blame him, can you?"

Flynn breathed a sigh of relief. Another potentially awkward moment between them had been successfully dealt with.

"Yeah, there's no accounting for taste. I suppose the rough and ready thuggish look appeals to some people."

"Oi, watch what you're saying you. I happen to be very sensitive underneath this appearance. My feelings are easily hurt you know."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, really."

Aaron was finding it difficult to concentrate. Every time Flynn came close to say something, he found himself getting lost in the feelings that being so close to him was producing. He leant forward again and said to Flynn "So, do you think the barman is the only person in here who likes my thuggish looks as you put it?"

With his ear leaning towards Aaron, and his face turned slightly away from him, Flynn smiled. He hoped this was leading to where he thought it was leading but he needed to be sure. More importantly, he needed Aaron to be sure. He put his mouth close to Aaron's ear and said " I doubt it. With this many people in here, you're bound to be someone's type aren't you?"

"Someone like you maybe. Could I be your type?"

Aaron moved back slightly to watch Flynn's reaction, moving his eyes between Flynn's eyes and mouth and back up to his eyes again. Flynn noticed the small movement of Aaron's eyes because he had done exactly the same. He leant in close and said " I don't have a type Aaron but I do like you, a lot."

"Good, because I like you too."

They both moved at the same time, their mouths meeting and pressing against each other, gently, tenderly as they shared their first proper kiss. There were only centimetres between them but it was too big a gap for Aaron. He placed his hand around the back of Flynn's neck and pulled him closer so their bodies were pressed against each other. Flynn's arm wrapped around Aaron's waist and his hand pressed into the small of Aaron's back. Their kiss deepened and, as far as they were concerned, they were the only two people in the world at that moment. They broke the kiss at virtually the same time stepping back slightly before it became obvious to anyone who cared to look at them just how much they were both enjoying themselves. They smiled shyly at each other, both surprised at what had just happened between them.

"Wow, that was unexpected" Flynn said.

"Yeah, wasn't it just" Aaron replied looking down at the floor.

Both of them stood there, their minds working overtime trying to decide what to do next.

"Here, hold this for me" Flynn said handing his bottle to Aaron "I'm just going to the loo." He needed to put some space between the two of them, just for a couple of minutes, give them both a chance to clear their heads. When he got back, he looked for Aaron but couldn't see him. A horrible feeling of panic washed over him as he looked around the bar searching through the crowds but Aaron was gone.

Damn it he said to himself. Why did he let Aaron kiss him, he should have known it would freak him out, that he wasn't ready but, having said that, if he wasn't ready, he'd done a pretty good impression of someone who was. Aaron had been the one who asked him if he was his type, Aaron had been the one who'd pulled him closer as their kiss had become more intense. Maybe he shouldn't have joined in the flirting, reminded him that they were supposed to be just friends before things went too far but he'd wanted that kiss to happen. He'd wanted it for a while and, by the feel of it, Aaron had wanted it too. He pulled out his mobile and dialled Aaron's number. It just rang and rang, then went to voicemail. "Aaron, what are you playing at? Look, that took us both by surprise, just phone me and we can talk about it ok?" He hurried through Bar West, checking his watch pushing his way through the crowds of people. Aaron had missed the last bus so there was only one place he could be, the taxi rank. When Flynn got there, however, it was deserted. Where the hell was he? If anything happened to him, he would never forgive himself. He phoned Aaron again, again it went straight to voicemail. A taxi arrived and he got in, holding his phone, willing it to ring but it didn't. He left a final message, his fifth one, at twenty past two in the morning - "Aaron, please mate, I'm really worried about you. If you don't want to talk to me yet that's fine, just text me to let me know you're ok. I'm sorry if I freaked you out, I didn't mean to. I hope you know that."

Back home lying on his bed, Aaron listened to Flynn's voicemail just like he'd listened to all the other messages Flynn had sent him. With each one, Flynn's voice had become more and more concerned, the panic ever more evident. Aaron switched his phone off and threw it on the floor. His head was a mess as he went over the evening's events. He reckoned he had gone through every emotion known to man in that one night. The pleasure he got just from being in Flynn's company, the comfortable feeling he got just spending time together with him, the ease with which he had been able to turn their usual banter into something more serious. The way his stomach lurched when Flynn had said how much he liked him, the anticipation he felt just before they kissed. Then, there was the kiss itself. The kiss had been amazing, every nerve in his body had seemed to come alive as their lips met. He couldn't close his eyes now no matter how tired he felt because whenever he did, he just pictured that kiss. He had been completely caught up in it all until Flynn had left him to go to the toilet. Then, the reality of what had happened hit home. The euphoria disappeared, gone in an instant to be replaced by an overwhelming feeling of panic and a need to get as far away from there as he could. He'd ran to the taxi rank and was lucky there was a taxi waiting. He felt sick all the way home and had to open a window, the cool fresh air blowing in his face making him feel a bit better. Then, there was the embarrassment of leaving Flynn stranded without saying a word to him, the embarrassment of revealing his feelings to Flynn and acting on them in such a public place followed by anger that he had allowed himself to end up in that situation in the first place. Now, he was left with a horrible all encompassing feeling of guilt. Guilt because Flynn was blaming himself when it had been him that had started it, guilt that he hadn't let Flynn know that he was ok, that he'd left him worrying but most of all guilt because he had betrayed Jackson. It felt to Aaron like he had cheated on him. He knew that didn't make any sense but that was how he felt. He'd kissed Flynn like he used to kiss Jackson in the beginning of their relationship and the feelings he felt as he and Flynn kissed were exactly the same too and that's what he couldn't cope with. It was just wrong, however he tried to justify it, it was wrong but, if that was the case, why did it feel so right too? Exhausted, he fell into an uneasy sleep, his body's natural need for rest winning the battle against his overactive mind.


	9. Chapter 9

Aaron woke up early the next morning, his head feeling heavy from lack of a good night's sleep. What a night, what a mess he'd made of everything just for a change. What must Flynn think of him, of his behaviour? He got out of bed and retrieved his phone from the floor and got back into bed again. He switched his phone on and placed it on the bed next to him. He chewed on his lip thinking about what to do next. He knew his behaviour last night had been bang out of order, he knew he had to talk to Flynn and try to explain but what if Flynn didn't want to talk to him? There was only one way he would know for definite. He dialled Flynn's number and it went straight to voicemail. He left a message "Hi Flynn, it's me. Er, I'm sorry about last night. I was hoping we could meet tonight. I really need to talk to you, try to explain, if you still want to listen that is so can you call me back, please."

A few miles away, in another bedroom, Flynn was awake having had probably as little sleep as Aaron. His phone beeped and he snatched it up looking at the screen telling him he had a new voicemail message. Please let it be Aaron he thought as he pressed the button. The sense of relief as he heard Aaron's voice was immense. Thank god he was ok. He listened to the message a couple of times. His gut instinct was to phone Aaron straight back, say of course he'd meet him and talk to him but a petty little part of him wanted to make him wait, make Aaron worry about whether he was alright for a change so for once, he ignored his gut instinct.

Aaron arrived at work looking like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. Cain wondered what had happened now. Aaron had been so much better recently, he thought he'd finally started to come to terms with everything but obviously, he'd been wrong. "Alright" he said. Aaron walked straight past him and into the garage. Cain knew better than to try and talk to him when he was like this so he left him to it. Aaron began working on a car trying to concentrate and not think about the previous night. He wondered why Flynn hadn't been in touch, he must have got his message by now. Maybe he'd decided that Aaron wasn't worth the bother. He worked steadily for about an hour, his mood not getting any better as time passed. Suddenly, his hand slipped causing a deep cut across his knuckles. "Damn it" he shouted, throwing the spanner on the ground before he kicked the wheel of the car for good measure.

"Hey, you're supposed to be fixing that motor, not causing it even more damage. And you better get that cleaned up too" Cain said noticing the blood on Aaron's knuckles. Aaron stormed off to clean his hand. On the way back Cain grabbed him. "Right, what's going on?"

"Just leave it Cain, I'm not in the mood alright."

"No, it's not alright. If something's put you in this bad a mood, it's serious. So, come on, out with it."

Aaron shook his head. "Just…leave…me…alone…ok."

"Well, whatever it is, you better sort it and quick. You're a liability in this mood."

"Well, in that case, I'm better off not being here then aren't I?"

Aaron pulled his arm out of Cain's grip and walked away. Cain just let him go. It was better for both of them if they weren't around each other just in case one of them did something they would regret. Just as he turned the corner, Aaron's phone beeped with a message. His heart rate quickened as he took his phone out to see Flynn's name on the screen. He swallowed and took a deep breath as he pressed to read the text.

"Can't meet tonight, busy. Am free this afternoon if that's any good."

Flynn's message was abrupt but at least he'd replied and agreed to meet him. He texted back saying this afternoon would be fine and asking what time and where. This time, the message came straight back "Bar West, 1 o'clock."

When Aaron arrived at Bar West, Flynn was playing pool with another lad. It was hard to believe this was the same bar they had been in last night. It was relatively empty and a lot quieter. There would be no problems hearing what was being said today. Aaron walked over and smiled a shy smile as Flynn looked at him. Flynn smiled back.

"Alright, fancy a beer?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah great. I'll be over when I finish this game."

Flynn was so relieved to see Aaron, to see that he was ok that any anger he had felt towards him over what happened last night just disappeared. Aaron went to the bar and ordered their drinks. He felt sick with nerves. He still had no idea what he was going to say exactly. The only thing he'd promised himself was that he would be as honest as he could. He owed Flynn that and himself too. He picked up their drinks from the bar and turned to see Flynn walking towards him. The contrast between the two of them last night and now was massive. Aaron handed Flynn a bottle. "Thanks, shall we sit over there?"

Aaron nodded and they went and sat down. As Aaron put his drink on the table, Flynn noticed his knuckles. They hadn't been like that last night. Oh no, what had he done? He nodded towards them "What happened?"

"I had an argument with a very tight nut and an engine this morning."

"Looks painful."

"I'll live."

They both took a sip of their drinks, neither one really knowing who should speak first. In the end, it was Aaron.

"Thank you for this. I didn't know after last night whether you would want to."

"Of course I want to. Do you have any idea what you put me through? You left without saying a word, you didn't answer your phone, you couldn't even be bothered to send me a text to let me know you were ok. I was scared Aaron. I spent all night worrying about you."

"I know and I'm sorry, I shouldn't have legged it like I did, I wasn't thinking."

"So why did you, leg it I mean?"

"I just couldn't handle it, I thought I could but I couldn't."

He took a deep breath before carrying on.

"Look, when we first met up that night, you offered to be my friend, a shoulder to cry on, someone to talk to."

"Yeah, and I meant every word. I was all those things for you, I still am."

"I know and I appreciate everything you've done for me. You really helped me Flynn. I don't know what I'd have done without you."

Flynn fixed his brown eyes on Aaron's blue ones, waiting for Aaron to continue.

"The thing is, the more time we spend together, the more difficult it is to ignore how much I like you."

"And is that a problem, liking me I mean?"

Aaron nodded. "Yeah, yeah it is. When you kissed me last night, I realised how big a problem it really was."

"When I kissed you" Flynn shook his head. "That's not exactly true now is it? We kissed each other because we both wanted to. Aaron, look, we're not going to get anywhere if you can't be honest with me, honest with yourself."

Aaron smiled at him. "Ok, when we kissed each other" he mumbled.

"That's better. See, wasn't so difficult was it?"

Aaron's face grew serious again. "Us kissing, it just made everything much more real. It wasn't just in my head anymore. I wasn't expecting anything like this to happen between us and I don't know how to deal with it." Aaron looked down, breaking eye contact with Flynn. Flynn's voice was soft as he said "If it's any consolation, I wasn't expecting it either. I hoped maybe one day, you know, that something would happen between us but it took me by surprise too. What I don't understand is why it's a problem."

Aaron shook his head, trying to find the right words. He took a deep breath before speaking again.

"It's because it makes me feel like I'm cheating on Jackson."

Flynn felt as if all the breath had been knocked out of him. "Oh, Oh, I see."

"Do you?"

"If I'm honest, no I don't. I'm sorry if this comes out wrong and I don't want to upset you but I don't see how you can cheat on someone who isn't around anymore."

"Just because he's not around anymore doesn't mean that I don't still think about him, that I don't still love him. He hasn't even been dead for a year, Flynn. How can I have feelings for you already, it's too soon."

Flynn took a deep breath. He didn't want to ask the question that was in his head, he was scared of the answer but he knew he had to. "So, what are you saying? Do you want us to go back to being just friends? We can stop this now if you want to, I mean, it was only one kiss wasn't it? We can just forget about it, pretend it didn't happen."

"Can we, are you sure, because I can't forget about it."

"No, me either. So, what do we do now?"

"I don't know. I know that I don't want to stop seeing you but I know that I can't be your boyfriend either, not yet, not until I can sort my head out. I'm sorry if it's not what you want to hear but you said I had to be honest with you and that's the truth."

"Ok, if that's how you feel, it's ok. I don't want to stop seeing you either so, you do what you need to do and I'll help any way I can."

"Why can't things ever be straightforward?"

"Because then life wouldn't be so interesting would it? I'll get us another drink, yeah."

"Yeah, that'd be great."

As Flynn walked to the bar, he thought about what they'd said to each other. It could have been a lot worse. At least Aaron hadn't said that he didn't have feelings for him, that the kiss was a mistake which, if he was honest, is what he was expecting to hear. If all Aaron needed was time to sort his head out, then he could have all the time in the world as far as he was concerned. He was going nowhere, he was in no rush. For him, nothing had changed. Aaron still needed help and he was going to give it.

Aaron, left alone with his thoughts, was surprised again at how much he'd been able to say to Flynn. He was proud of himself for being honest and telling the truth, it would have been a lot easier to lie, say things to hurt Flynn, push him away and make him leave. He really hoped that he could get his head sorted out soon, get a grip on his feelings and make some sort of sense of it all. He had a feeling that Flynn and him could be good together if he was only able to give them a chance but he knew at the moment he couldn't. His feelings for Jackson were still too strong.

Flynn came back with the drinks and sat back down again. Aaron looked better, more relaxed and he felt better too. Clearing the air had obviously done them both good.

"So, what you up to tonight then. Your message said you were busy."

"Yeah, I've got to pack. Get some stuff sorted out. I have to go away again for a couple of days with college."

"Again. Where do you go exactly and what do you do?"

"Not far and as little as I can get away with. Anyway, I don't want to talk about college especially as I'm supposed to be there right now."

"But, you were the one who suggested meeting this afternoon."

"Yeah, that was because you needed to talk and I didn't want to go away without speaking to you."

Aaron grinned at him and he grinned back.

"Come on, fancy a few games of pool before you have to go."

"Sure but I'm not going easy on you just because you've got sore knuckles and I'm not accepting it as an excuse either for when you lose."

"If I lose, you mean."

Without either of them noticing, they had slipped into what was becoming a normal routine for them. A few games of pool, some friendly banter and some time spent enjoying just being in each other's company.


	10. Chapter 10

**These characters still belong to Emmerdale and ITV**

Flynn was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, in no mood to move. His sleep had been uneasy and he'd been awake for ages despite it being quite early. The reason he had had such an uneasy night was because he had something on his mind, a niggling thought that wouldn't go away. Also he hadn't slept well because he had lied to Aaron, something he wasn't very proud of. In fact, he had lied twice. The first time was saying that he was going away again with college. He wasn't. He had just said that to explain why he couldn't have met Aaron last night. It was the first thing that had come into his head that he knew Aaron would believe. The second lie was in saying that he was ok with everything after their chat when he wasn't. Aaron wasn't the only one who needed to sort his head out.

He had covered pretty well yesterday, Aaron certainly hadn't seemed to notice anything or he would have said something for sure. All the way home, their conversation went round and round in his head. He had thought they were getting somewhere, especially after Aaron had told him that he liked him and, of course, there was the kiss. Aaron had even said that he couldn't forget how it had made him feel. Now, after their chat, he felt like they were back at square one again, any progress they had made abruptly halted. That kiss was like a door had opened showing him a glimpse of what could be between them and now after yesterday's chat, Aaron had firmly slammed it shut again.

He went downstairs, switched the TV on and went to get some breakfast. Two hours later, he was still sitting there, staring at the screen, watching it but not watching it at the same time. His brother came in and sat down. He was three years older than Flynn, physically very similar just a few inches taller.

"Are you watching this only I was going to stick the play station on?"

He got no reply.

"Oi, cloth ears, I said are you watching this?"

Still no reply. He shook his head. "Flynn!" he shouted.

"What, there's no need to shout. We are in the same room you know."

"I know and that's three times I've tried to talk to you. Are you watching this or what?"

"No, no, do what you like with it." Flynn stared off into space, chewing on one of his fingernails.

His brother switched it off and moved to sit next to Flynn on the sofa.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"About what?"

"Whatever's bothering you."

Flynn looked at his brother. They were close, always had been. They still bickered and fought as brothers do but he knew he could talk to him honestly and, right now, he needed someone to talk to.

"I've got this friend and, he's having a hard time at the moment. His boyfriend was involved in a crash. His van ended up on the rail tracks and was hit by a train. He survived but was paralysed from the neck down. Then, about seven months ago, he died."

"Oh god, I don't know what to say, that's terrible."

"Master of the understatement, you are. Anyway, as you can imagine, he's a wreck. We met by chance in Bar West one night and started talking. We began meeting up for a few drinks. We went out for the day a few times and he opened up a bit, started to talk about things. The more time we spent together, the closer we became."

His brother put his head down. He had a feeling he knew where this was going but he waited for Flynn to continue.

"Anyway, the other night, things came to a head and we kissed. He freaked out and disappeared. Then, he asked if we could meet to talk so we did. We met yesterday to clear the air."

"And did you?"

"I thought so at the time but I've been thinking about everything that was said and now, I'm not so sure. He told me he wants to keep seeing me but he's not ready for a boyfriend yet. I told him that I was fine with being just his friend and I want to do this for him, help him by doing what I can but…."

"But it's not what you want."

"No it isn't but I don't have a choice do I? Besides, that's not the only thing that's bothering me. What if, when he gets himself sorted out and comes to terms with things properly, he decides he doesn't want to know me anymore. What if I've served my purpose?"

"Do you really think that might happen?"

"I don't know. It just scares me that it might. If you saw him, you'd think he was just some hoodie wearing thug who can take care of himself, who nobody would mess with but, he's not really like that. He's vulnerable, sensitive and there's just something about him that draws you to him. If I spend all this time with him and he then tells me that he doesn't need me around anymore I don't know what I'd do."

"Well, if that's his choice when the time comes, there's nothing you can do about it is there? What you have to decide is whether you're prepared to take the risk or not, whether you think he's worth putting what you want on hold for however long it takes for him to get sorted."

Flynn put his head down and smiled to himself.

"That's a yes then is it? Look, I know it's easy for me to say but try to stay positive. You're always a glass is half empty type of person when it comes to relationships, always waiting for things to go wrong."

"Yeah, that's because if you think the worst is going to happen and it doesn't, it's a bonus."

"That is a weird way of looking at things. Look, you're a nice lad and nice lads usually come out winners in the end."

"If my life was a film by Disney, then maybe that would be true."

"Just, hang in there, ok. He didn't have to get back in touch with you after he disappeared but he did. Doesn't that tell you something?"

"I suppose so." He put his arms around his brother and gave him a hug. "Thanks for listening."

"You're welcome. Any time, you know that. So, shall we stick the play station on then."

"Yeah, go on then."

At that moment, Flynn's mobile beeped with a message. He looked at the screen to see Aaron's name. He read the message "Text me when we can meet. Be good to see you x"

"Is that from him?"

"Yeah"

He moved quickly and snatched the phone out of Flynn's hands.

"Oi, give me that back."

He read the message, smiled and threw the phone gently back to Flynn.

"No, he obviously isn't interested in you at all, is he?"

"Just, shut up and play, will you."

They both smiled. Flynn typed a quick reply back to Aaron. He had a lot of thinking to do. Was Aaron worth taking a chance on, sticking around for just in case things worked out for them at some point? Was he prepared to put himself in a position where Aaron could hurt him again? Could he cope if things didn't work out for them? These were questions he would have to think about over the next couple of days so that when he saw Aaron again, at least one of them would have got their head sorted out.

A couple of days later, Flynn was waiting for Aaron in Bar West. He'd done a lot of thinking. Was Aaron worth taking a chance on? He'd decided yes he was. Was he prepared to risk Aaron hurting him again? That had took longer to resolve but again, he had decided yes. Could he cope if things didn't work out between them? That was the easiest of the three questions and the answer was no. So, as the old song said, two out of three ain't bad. He felt a hand rest on his shoulder and squeeze it gently. He turned to see Aaron smiling at him, his blue eyes sparkling and he knew instantly that the decisions he had made were the right ones.

"Get them in then" Aaron said.

"Already have" Flynn said passing him a bottle of lager.

"I could get used to this" Aaron said.

"What, me buying you a drink?"

"That's part of it, yeah" Aaron said with raised eyebrows.

Flynn smiled at him. Maybe his brother had been right. Maybe this time, he would come out a winner in the end.


	11. Chapter 11

The song words belong to Adele, Rihanna, Snow Patrol and Paul Weller.

Aaron had been thinking about the weekend. He wanted to do something a bit different with Flynn rather than just go to Bar West. Maybe they could go out for something to eat and then go round a few pubs or maybe see a film. He was happy either way as long as he was with Flynn so he would just let him choose. He took out his mobile and dialled Flynn's number, the familiar feeling of nervousness coming over him as he waited to hear Flynn's voice.

"Alright Aaron, how are you?"

"Hiya mate, yeah, I'm good thanks, you?"

"Yeah, fine. Listen, I'm glad you phoned, I wanted to see if you wanted to do something at the weekend."

"Great minds think alike, I was just going to ask you the same thing."

"Don't you need to have a mind in the first place to have a great one?"

"You're such a comedian, you're wasted at college."

"Go on then, seeing as you phoned me, you can go first."

"Ok, well I was thinking maybe we could go for something to eat and then hit the pubs or go see a film. You can choose."

"Great, I'd love to go out and have something to eat, nothing fancy though, just pizza or something but how do you fancy going to a party afterwards instead of hitting the pubs. We can stay for a while and if it's really bad, then go for a drink somewhere else."

"Sounds good as long as these friends are better than that prat you introduced me to before."

Flynn laughed. "You don't need to worry, these people are fine."

"Great so shall we meet outside Bar West usual time and go from there?"

"Yeah, that'd be good. See you Saturday then."

"Ok, see you Saturday."

Aaron had just stepped out of the shower and was standing in his bedroom, a towel wrapped around his waist, looking out of the window. Marlon was walking up the road from the shop towards the pub. Now there was someone who had been through more personal tragedy than most and had managed to move on. Aaron envied Marlon because he had achieved what Aaron was hoping to, to get over the death of someone you loved and find love again with someone else. He was getting there, he'd given up trying to tell himself that he didn't have feelings for Flynn because it was obvious that he did. He was starting to accept that it was ok to have these feelings. What he hadn't got to grips with at all was how far to go with these feelings. That was the bit that made him feel uncomfortable. Still, as he said, he was getting there. He dressed, put his mobile in his pocket, ran downstairs to get his wallet, keys and jacket, shouted goodbye to Paddy and left. On the bus into town, he came to a decision. Just for tonight, he wasn't going to spend his time constantly thinking whether he should be doing this or should be doing that, he was just going to do what he felt was right and see what happened.

Flynn was waiting for him when he got there, a broad smile lighting up his face when he saw Aaron approaching. Aaron smiled back. They made their way to the restaurant, chatting away easily and they were still chatting as they left the restaurant to get a taxi to the party. As they got in the taxi and Flynn gave the driver the address, Aaron sat back and realised just how relaxed and at ease he felt. As they were driving along, the taxi driver decided he was bored with the music on the radio and started pressing the buttons to look for another channel to listen to. Flynn's head turned from looking out of the window as he heard "I know you haven't made your mind up yet but I would never do you wrong" closely followed by "Hey boy, I really wanna be with you cos you're just my type" then "would you lay with me and just forget the world" ending with "you do something to me, something deep inside" before the driver decided that silence was golden and switched it off completely. Flynn laughed. Aaron looked at him. "What you laughing at?"

"Nothing. It's just, it doesn't matter. I'll explain one day." Flynn added the songs to the fact that their first meeting shouldn't have happened because he shouldn't have even been in Bar West that night and the Coldplay song that had made his mind up that morning in his kitchen that he would do whatever it took to help Aaron. Something was definitely exerting an influence over them, he was sure of it now.

Aaron shrugged and pulled a face. They paid the taxi driver and walked up the path to the house where the party was being held. "Alright?" Flynn asked Aaron.

"Yeah, no problem" Aaron replied, smiling back at him. He nudged Flynn's arm with his as they got to the door.

The house was noisy and full of people. As they walked in, people were calling Flynn's name, saying hello to him, asking who his new friend was. This would have been Aaron's worst nightmare not so long ago but not now. They made their way further through the crowd. Suddenly, Flynn was pulled into a bear hug by the biggest guy Aaron had seen. Definitely a rugby player type of bloke. "Flynn, glad you could make it, pal."

Flynn grinned at him. "Well, I said I would if I could. Nick, this is Aaron, Aaron, Nick. He's one of my best friends."

For a minute, Aaron thought he was going to be grabbed the way Flynn had been but Nick just stuck out his hand. "Nice to meet you, finally, though I feel like I know you already." Aaron shook his hand and Flynn said "Now then Nick, you promised to behave." Nick grinned.

"So Aaron, you're a mechanic, what's the most expensive car you've ever worked on?" Aaron smiled and started talking. Flynn knew he'd be ok with Nick so he said "I'll go and get us some drinks." He underestimated how long it would take him, talking to people he hadn't seen in ages, telling the same stories over and over again. Suddenly, Nick's face appeared laughing. "Flynn, I think you need to go and rescue Aaron. I only left him for a minute I swear."

Flynn took their bottles of lager to see what Nick was going on about. In a corner of the living room, Aaron was pinned up against the wall by a girl. She was talking nineteen to the dozen, determined that Aaron was going nowhere now she'd got him where she wanted him. Aaron's face was a picture. Flynn burst out laughing. Aaron didn't look too bothered but he supposed he'd better go and see if he was ok. He made his way across the room and handed Aaron his drink. "There you go, sorry I took so long, I got talking."

Aaron took the drink and smiled. "No problem, you're back now" he said all sweetness and light.

The girl turned to look at Flynn and her face fell. "Oh no, he's not with you is he Flynn?"

Flynn nodded. "I'm afraid so, yes."

"Typical" she said "the best looking guy here and he's gay." She walked off and Aaron and Flynn laughed.

"God, she could talk. I never got a chance to say anything. I'm sure if you hadn't come back, I'd have been there all night. She was not letting me go anywhere."

"Good job I came back then isn't it? So, do you want to stay a while or move on?"

"We'll have these and then decide."

They stayed close, their hands occasionally touching, people coming up to talk to them, they all seemed really nice and made sure to include Aaron in their conversations. They had decided that they would go when they'd finished their drinks, not because they weren't having a good time but because they wanted to be on their own. They were talking to a guy from Flynn's college. Flynn had just gone to the loo before they left so Aaron was talking to him.

"So, you're on the same course as Flynn are you?"

"Yeah, that's right. It's not too bad as courses go."

"Yeah, it seems alright. You were away on one of those trips again weren't you?"

"No, we haven't been away for a while now."

Aaron felt sick." Oh right, I must have got it wrong then."

Flynn arrived back at that precise moment. "So are you ready then?"

Quietly, Aaron said "Yeah, course." Flynn noticed the change in Aaron's voice, the change in his face and was confused. He'd been fine a couple of minutes ago.

They left the house and walked in silence for a while. "So, what did you think, did you enjoy yourself?

"Yeah" was all Aaron could say.

"How did you get on with Nick? He loves cars, I thought you two might get along."

"Yeah, it was fine."

Something was definitely wrong. Flynn went back over the evening and couldn't think of anything that had happened that could have made Aaron like this. In fact, this was probably the best night they'd had together so far. Flynn put his hand on Aaron's arm to stop him from walking.

"Aaron, what's wrong?"

"Why don't you tell me?" Aaron replied fixing his blue eyes on Flynn.

"What do you mean why don't I tell you, why don't I tell you what?"

"Why don't you tell me why you lied to me. Why you told me you were going away with college for a couple of days when you weren't."

Flynn felt like he'd been punched in the stomach. Someone must have said something at the party. He put his head down and shook his head.

"So, you're not denying it then" Aaron said, a steely tone to his voice.

"Aaron, look, whatever you're thinking, I promise, it's not what it seems."

"No? You have no idea what I'm thinking."

"Look, we can't talk here. Why don't you come back to mine, I'll explain everything if you give me the chance."

Aaron looked at Flynn's face, usually so happy, now pale and completely devastated. The old Aaron would have said no chance and stormed off but he remembered the promise he'd made to himself. To not think about what he should do but to go with his feelings and his feelings said to give Flynn a chance to explain. "Fine, let's go then."

The journey to Flynn's house felt like the longest journey they'd both ever been on. Flynn unlocked the door and switched the lights on in the empty house. "Would you like a drink?" he said, more to break the silence than anything else. "Yeah, I'll have a tea please."

"You go in, I'll bring the tea in in a minute."

Aaron went in and sat on the sofa, wondering what he was about to be told. He was trying to stay calm. So far, all he knew was that Flynn had lied to him. That hurt but until he knew the reason for the lying, he didn't know what he was going to do. Flynn came in with the two mugs of tea and put them down on a little table. He sat at the other end of the sofa but turned sideways to face Aaron. He took a deep breath. God, this was going to be difficult. Aaron turned to look at him. "Well" he said. Flynn was unnerved by this calm Aaron, it would have been easier if he'd shouted or been angry with him.

Flynn sighed. "Ok, I lied. I didn't go away with college, not this time. The other times I told you I was away, that was the truth, I can show you the timetable if you want to see it. I said I was away because I needed some time on my own. We'd just had that major chat after we'd kissed and I needed some time to think."

"About what? I thought the whole point of that chat was to clear the air, so we both knew where we stood. What more was there to think about?"

"Plenty. Look, I'm trying to do the right thing here, I really am but it's so difficult."

Aaron twisted his position so he was facing Flynn. "Why? Why is it so difficult?"

"Oh, come on Aaron, don't make me say it. You know why."

Aaron nodded his head. "Because you want to be more than friends, right"

Flynn nodded. "That's only part of it though." Aaron stared into Flynn's eyes, both of them aware that the next few minutes could be crucial.

"Me and Matt, I told you we split because it wasn't what I wanted anymore. The reason it wasn't what I wanted anymore was because he cheated on me. My first proper boyfriend and he did that to me. I was devastated. I got over it eventually and then I met you. I thought that I'd found someone that I could be happy with but then you hurt me too."

Aaron felt a lump rising in his throat. "I'm so sorry about that. I never meant to hurt you. I tried to explain."

"Yeah, I know and I understand why you went back to Jackson, I do but it didn't stop it hurting though."

The way they had both positioned themselves meant that their knees were just about touching.

"That's why I needed the time on my own. I've been hurt badly twice now. I needed to think about whether I could put myself through whatever me and you were going to go through, risk getting hurt again on a promise of what might be."

They looked at each other, both staring intently into the other's eyes, sparkling blue eyes meeting deep brown ones. Aaron suddenly realised what a lot he'd been expecting of Flynn. To help him get over Jackson, move on, rebuild his life and do all of that while trying to put his feelings to one side until he, Aaron, might be ready to take things further. He shook his head. Remembering his promise to himself to do what he felt was right , he reached out and took one of Flynn's hands in his own. He rubbed his thumb gently up and down Flynn's hand as he held it.

"And what did you decide?"

Flynn had to concentrate hard to get his mind back on what he was going to say.

"Well, I carried on seeing you, didn't I so I decided yes, it was worth the risk, even if it was only on a what might be."

In a quiet voice, Aaron said "what if I changed the what might be to what will be, would that help?"

Flynn's mouth was completely dry, he didn't know if he was able to speak. Fortunately, he didn't have to as Aaron carried on talking.

"I know I said that I wasn't ready for a boyfriend yet and I'm still not, not in the, you know, the proper meaning of boyfriend but I can't ignore how I feel about you either. When I am ready, I want it to be you but I can't tell you how long it will take to get there."

Flynn smiled at him. "That doesn't matter. It's just such a relief to know you feel the same way, I thought I might scare you off if I told you the truth."

Aaron laughed. "You don't need to worry. My running days are over."

He leaned towards Flynn and their lips met, another soft, gentle kiss to start with, growing more intense the longer it lasted. Aaron ran his tongue along Flynn's bottom lip, waiting to see if Flynn's tongue wanted to come out and play and it did. Suddenly, the front door slammed. They jumped apart as Flynn's brother came in.

"Oh, sorry, I've got a really bad sense of timing haven't I?"

Flynn laughed. "Yeah, you have. Aaron, this is Harrison, my brother."

Aaron turned around to say hello. "Nice to meet you, mate"

This must be the friend that Flynn was talking about the other day Harrison thought. His description was spot on, he did look like he could take care of himself, that no one would mess with him but there was something endearing about him too. It was in those eyes. That's where you saw the real person, not the person that you assumed he was from the outside appearance.

"Yeah, you too. Anyway, I'll get out of your way. Maybe see you again sometime." He went straight upstairs and they heard a door shut.

The moment was gone but neither of them minded. There were no doubts anymore about where they stood, what they felt for each other. They smiled at each other.

"I better call a taxi and get home" Aaron said.

"We never did drink that tea did we?"

"No, but you can make me another one while we wait for the taxi and you haven't got any biscuits have you, I'm starving."

"I'll see what I can find" Flynn said, giving Aaron a quick kiss before he stood up. Both of them knew that they would sleep a lot easier that night than either of them had recently.


	12. Chapter 12

Aaron and Flynn had woken up that morning in good moods. The previous night had been a good night for both of them but especially for Flynn. Before they'd had their chat, he was struggling with keeping his feelings in check but now he didn't have to worry about that anymore and it felt great. Just knowing that he could hold Aaron's hand, kiss him if he wanted to without having to wait for Aaron to make a move first filled him with happiness. He was still conscious of the fact that Aaron was adjusting to things, adjusting to being with him so there was no way he was going to jeopardise that by going over the top with his affections and abusing the privilege that Aaron had given him. Just knowing that he could do it if he wanted to was enough.

They had spoken for over an hour not long after waking up and had decided to meet that lunchtime, make the most of the sunny weather while it lasted. They spent their time walking around the country park, went to the pub for something to eat before Flynn dropped him home again. They'd kissed in the car before arranging to talk later in the week. As Flynn drove off, Aaron was left with mixed feelings. He was happy with how things were going with Flynn but still uneasy about the situation at the same time. Always seeing Flynn away from the village wasn't helping either, it gave the whole thing a feeling of deceit and he didn't like it. In the beginning, having two lives was perfect for him, now he was thinking maybe it was time to change that.

As he walked in, Paddy was sitting having a cup of tea. He grinned when he saw Aaron.

"Here he is, Mr Happy himself."

Aaron sat down opposite him, saying nothing.

"So, did you have a good time, then?"

"Yes, thank you and I'm not telling you anymore than that so you needn't start firing questions at me."

"As if I would. I'm just glad to see you getting back to your old self again. Whoever he is, he's obviously having a good effect on you. So, does he have a name then?"

"Nice try, Paddy but I told you, no information, not yet anyway. So, are you going to make me a brew then or what?"

Paddy got up to put the kettle on and when he turned back around, Aaron was staring off into space. He then closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and finger before shaking his head.

"What's up?"

"I don't know, Paddy. It's been less than a year, should I be out, enjoying myself, meeting people, getting on with my life?"

"Yes, of course you should. Aaron, there's no time frame on grief. All this less than a year stuff. If you take it literally, you're saying that on day 364, you have to be miserable, stuck in a rut but on day 365, it's ok to be happy and start living again. It doesn't work like that. There's only one rule and that's do whatever's right for you. There's no future living in the past."

Aaron laughed. "You what? Where did you get that little gem from, that desk calendar of yours with a thought for each day on it?"

"No, it's actually from a song but it's very apt. Dwelling on the past, not allowing yourself to move on means that you can't have a future. No one expects you to forget Jackson but they don't expect you to stay frozen in time either."

"I know, it's just it's not easy."

"I bet. You know, if you've got something on your mind, if something's bothering you, you could always do what you used to do when you had a problem."

"What's that, go and smack someone."

"No, you idiot. Go and talk to Jackson. It might help, you know, get it off your chest."

Paddy went upstairs and left Aaron alone. Five minutes later, he heard the front door slam.

Aaron walked through the small cemetery, heading towards Jackson's final resting place. He thought about all the hours he had spent there, talking to him, crying over him, sometimes just sitting there to be close to him again, even the time that Paddy and Adam had had to virtually carry him away, so overcome with grief, his legs wouldn't hold him. He approached Jackson's headstone, tracing over the lettering of his name with his fingers, wishing it was the contours of Jackson's face he was tracing instead. He crouched down and placed a small white bag containing Jackson's favourite sweets next to the fresh flowers that someone had left.

"Hiya mate. I brought you something, just don't eat them all at once, you know what too much sherbet does to you." He shifted his position so he was sitting to the side of the headstone and leant against it.

"I need your help Jackson. I don't know who else I can talk to. No one gets me like you do, did." He sighed as he corrected himself to the past tense. "There's so much I need to say but I don't know where to start. It was hard enough when you were here but now…" his voice trailed off as a lump came into his throat and a solitary tear trickled down his cheek.

"I suppose I should just say what's on my mind so here goes. When I lost you, I thought my world had ended. My boyfriend, my best friend, the person I loved most in the world gone just like that. I never thought I would meet someone else, never thought I would want to but I have. I like him Jackson even though I tried not to. I like being with him, I look forward to seeing him and I miss him when I'm not with him. All the things I used to feel about you when we first got together, I feel about him but I feel like I'm betraying you at the same time, like I'm cheating or something. I feel guilty for liking him because I still love you but you're not here anymore." The tears were in freefall now, streaming down his face. "I'm scared too, scared of forgetting you. I'm still wearing your chain, I'll never take it off but little things about you are getting harder to remember. Even the shirt of yours that I took doesn't smell of you anymore. Everything's changing and I don't know if I'm ready to completely let you go yet, if I'll ever be. I just wish you could tell me what to do mate, if what's happening to me and how I feel is ok."

He collapsed sobbing, knowing it was futile to try and keep the tears at bay. He was aware of a movement out of the corner of his eye and looked to see a butterfly land on Jackson's headstone. It stayed for a few seconds before flying off. Aaron remembered what Flynn had told him about his Nan and her theory. Was the butterfly a sign that Jackson was now free? It would be nice to think so after all those months of being trapped in that prison of a body. Suddenly, a strange feeling of calmness came over him that he couldn't explain. He didn't know if it was talking about Flynn or the thought of Jackson finally being free but he did feel a bit better. He knew what he had to do now. There was someone else he needed to talk to before he went home. He stood up and rested his hand on the top of the headstone.

"Cheers mate. Don't ask me how but you've helped me again. I've got to go now but I'll come back and see you again soon, I promise. I love you." He turned and walked slowly away

Aaron headed down the road dreading the conversation that was about to take place. He and Hazel had been through so much together. They'd had their ups and downs, times where they'd disliked each other, times where they'd got along like a house on fire. Due to their mutual love for Jackson, there was a bond between them that would always be there, no matter what. Aaron had seen more of Hazel and spent more time with Hazel than he had with his own mum. They'd helped each other, supported each other and that's why the thought that what he was about to tell her might hurt her or upset her made him feel physically sick.

He walked up the path and stood on the doorstep. He stood there a good five minutes trying to get up the courage to knock on the door. He shook his head, he couldn't do it. He turned away and began to walk back down the path again. He got about half way down and stopped. He had to speak to her, it was the right thing to do, he owed her the truth at least. He took a deep breath, turned, walked up the path and knocked on the door with a shaking hand. Hazel opened it, a surprised look on her face when she saw who was standing there.

"Hello love, I wasn't expecting to see you. Come in" she said leaving the door for Aaron to close behind him. When Jackson had died, the cottage had been changed back to a more conventional layout, meaning Aaron now found himself standing in the living room. Hazel took a seat and looked at Aaron. He looked like he'd been crying.

"Well, sit down then, you make the place look untidy standing there."

"No thanks, you're alright."

"Oh, ok then. So, to what do I owe the pleasure of your riveting company then?"

Aaron's voice was quiet, barely above a whisper.

"There's er something I need to tell you."

"Oh right, sounds serious."

Aaron looked down at the floor, his hands in his pockets. "Yeah, yeah it is."

She'd seen that expression, that pained look too many times before. She knew exactly what it meant. Aaron was troubled and, whatever was on his mind was not going to be easy for him to say. Ignoring the rising feeling of dread and keeping her voice as calm as possible, she said "Aaron, love, what is it?"

He took a deep breath and looked up to meet Hazel's eyes with his, tears already brimming in them again.

"You know I'll never forget Jackson, right. If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be who I am today and I'll always love him. I need you to know that."

"Yeah, I know that."

"Well, it's just that, in the last few months, I've been seeing a lot of someone. He's been really good to me, helped me a lot, to come to terms with what happened to Jackson and to start to get my life back on track again." He paused to wipe away a tear.

"I tried so hard not to like him in that way, I really did but I can't help it. Nothings happened yet but…."

"But you'd like it to." Hazel finished his sentence for him.

"Yeah, yeah I would, eventually. I'm not ready yet but, if I was, then…" his voice trailed off.

Hazel nodded. "And does he feel the same way?"

"Yeah, he does."

Hazel had, like everyone else in the village, seen an improvement in Aaron's mood over the last few months, how he'd been virtually back to his old self again, how he seemed to be coping a lot better. Now she knew why. She also knew that this was bound to happen one day. He was young, he wasn't going to stay on his own forever. She just wasn't expecting it so soon. It had been less than a year, after all. Aaron's voice broke into her thoughts.

"Well, say something." His heart was pounding as he waited for Hazel's reaction. She shook her head.

"I, I don't know what to say. I suppose it was going to happen sooner or later. I mean, you're not that bad looking, you can even look quite pleasant when you're not frowning or scowling at everyone. It's just a bit of a shock, that's all."

"Yeah, tell me about it. Believe me, this was the last thing I expected to happen."

Hazel looked at the troubled lad standing in front of her and she believed everything he'd just told her. It didn't make what he was saying any easier to hear though.

"Look love, if anyone knows what Jackson meant to you, it's me but, it's right that you should move on. I'm really grateful that you came to tell me, you didn't have to you know."

"Yeah, I did. I wanted you to hear it from me."

"But you said that nothing had happened yet so why tell me now?"

"Because, one day, I'd like to be able to bring him to the village, spend some time with him here and I can't do that if you don't know about him, if you're not prepared. It wouldn't be fair and I couldn't do that to you."

Hazel smiled at him and he shyly smiled back.

"So, who else knows about him then?"

"Just one other person."

"Ah right and what does Paddy have to say about it then?"

Aaron's eyes dropped down to look at the floor again. "It's not Paddy, he doesn't know yet. The other person who knows is Jackson. I've just been to tell him."

"Jackson" Hazel couldn't keep the surprise out of her voice.

"Well yeah, I couldn't not tell him could I?"

Hazel shook her head. Aaron really was a one off. He could be the most pig headed, stubborn little so and so that you could ever meet but then at other times like now, like telling Jackson first, he could be the sweetest, most endearing person ever. Her eyes filled with tears too as she said "You're a good lad Aaron and Jackson was lucky to have had you in his life."

Aaron shook his head. "I think you'll find that should be the other way round."

She smiled at him. "So, will I get to meet him at some point then, warn him about what he's letting himself in for."

This was the bit that Aaron was really dreading but he'd promised himself that he would tell Hazel everything.

"You've er already met him."

"You what?"

Aaron chewed on his bottom lip, raised his eyes to the ceiling as he searched for the strength to tell her. In a quiet voice, he uttered just two words. "It's Flynn."

Hazel thought she was hearing things, her attitude changed instantly.

"Flynn! Did you say Flynn? The same Flynn that you were seeing before. The Flynn that you being with broke my Jackson's heart, that Flynn."

Aaron's blue eyes flashed with anger. "That's not fair Hazel and you know it. I wouldn't have gone within a million miles of Flynn or anyone else for that matter if Jackson hadn't kept pushing me away, telling me he didn't love me anymore, that he didn't want me around. Even after he did all that, I still came back to him because it was Jackson that I wanted."

"So what did you do, keep in touch with Flynn as some sort of back up."

"No" Aaron shouted. "You know I spent all my time with Jackson apart from when I was working. I mean, you were always there with us weren't you?"

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

This was not going how Aaron had planned so he took a deep breath and tried to calm down. When he started speaking again, his voice started to crack. "Look Hazel, I don't want to argue with you and I don't want to upset you. Jackson was my world. He was everything to me and, when he died I didn't know how I would be able to carry on, if I would be able to carry on. The thought of living without him was unthinkable. I went out to drown my sorrows one night, on my own, and bumped into Flynn. It was completely accidental, I swear. We got talking and it went from there. Like I said nothing's happened yet but if you don't want to believe me, that's up to you."

Hazel had calmed down now too. "I'm sorry, ok. I shouldn't have said what I said. I know it wasn't your fault, I know what Jackson did to you but Flynn of all people"

Aaron smiled a small smile. "I know, that's exactly what I said pretty much word for word."

She stood up and walked over to Aaron. She reached out and pulled him into a hug and he hugged her back.

"Look, if it's what you want, then I'm pleased for you. I really am. Thanks again for telling me, I know it can't have been easy."

Aaron just shook his head.

"Can you wait here for a minute?" she asked him

"Yeah, why?"

"Just, stay there alright."

Aaron nodded and Hazel disappeared upstairs. She returned a couple of minutes later with something in her hand. "Here, this is for you."

"What is it?" Aaron asked.

"Well, I'm no expert but it looks to me like a letter."

Aaron looked at the unfamiliar writing on the envelope, then looked back at Hazel. Her voice went quieter as she said "It's a letter from Jackson."

Aaron's legs turned to jelly as he collapsed into the nearest chair. "I,I,I don't understand."

"I came in one day and there it was on the side all sealed up. He asked me to hold on to it and give it to you when you met someone, when you were ready to move on."

"But, how did he know I'd come and tell you. I didn't know until a few minutes ago."

"Funny, I asked him the very same question and do you know what he said? He said Mum, I know Aaron better than he knows himself. Trust me, he'll come and tell you because he'll think it's the right thing to do, he'll feel like he needs to explain himself to you personally. And he was right wasn't he?"

Aaron sniffed. "He always did know what I was going to do before I did."

"Well, I'm off to meet Bob in the pub. You're welcome to stay here if you want to read it in private. The spare key is on the side, just lock the door behind you and push the key back through the letterbox."

"Thanks Hazel" he murmured.

She smiled at him gently squeezing his arm before she left. He held the letter in his shaking hands just looking at it. He didn't know if he wanted to read it, he didn't know if he could read it, he was scared of what it might say. He twisted the envelope in his hands for a couple of minutes. Then, his hand reached up to the chain he wore, Jackson's chain, and he rubbed it like he always did when he wanted some comfort. He took a deep breath, opened the envelope and took out the letter. He unfolded it and began to read.


	13. Chapter 13

Hey Gorgeous. How are you doing?

Bet this has caught you by surprise, hearing from me again hasn't it? I was going to leave you this letter on my laptop but then I remembered Mum would be looking after it until it was time for you to read it. Not a good idea, you know what she's like, she'd probably delete it or drop the laptop and break it so I thought, to be on the safe side, I'd go back to the old fashioned way and put pen to paper. Well, Joe actually put the pen to the paper but the words are definitely all mine. Plus, once you've read it, you can keep it safe in case you need to read it again and, knowing you, you will do. Oh, and you don't need to worry, Mum knows absolutely nothing about what's in this letter and by the time you get to read it, Joe will have left the village and be caring for someone else. This is just between you and me mate so, I hope you're sitting comfortably, pin back those ears of yours and listen.

First, I want to say thank you, for everything you've done for me, for never giving up on me and for loving me no matter what. Even when I was a complete pain in the backside, you stayed with me and I'll never forget that. I'll never forget you either - the way you looked at me with those gorgeous blue eyes of yours and how my stomach flips every time I see you, the faces you pull when you don't quite understand what's going on or when things don't go how you expect them to go, your smile which melts my heart every time I see it, the tender way you looked after me and always put me first. You're a very special person, Aaron, and I'm so proud that I was able to say you were my boyfriend. I never loved anyone the way that I love you, you were definitely "the one."

This is probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. It's so weird. I can picture your face so clearly reading this letter but I know that if I try to say what I need to say to you to your face, you won't listen to me and I need you to listen Aaron, please.

If you're reading this, then I'm not alive anymore but, just because my life is over doesn't mean that yours has to be. I don't want you to stop living and just exist, just go through the motions because I'm not around anymore. I want you to have the sort of life you deserve to have. I want you to have fun, do all the things you want to do and most of all be happy. Don't let anything get in the way of that including me.

Now, for the tricky bit, the bit you won't want to hear. You know I think you're gorgeous, I've told you often enough even though you hate me saying it. Well, if I think that, at some point, someone else is going to think it too and he'll fall in love with you just like I did. If you're really lucky, you'll feel the same way about him. Now, I know you, you'll be shaking your head and saying it will never happen, it can't happen but we both know one day it will, you won't be able to help it and neither will he. It might be in a few months time, it might be next year but, when it does happen, I want you to go for it. I don't want you to feel guilty or feel like you having a new boyfriend means that what we had didn't matter. What we had was special, very special, but I'm not around anymore, you are and you need to move on. Everyone deserves to be loved and wanted and made to feel special, everyone needs that, especially you mate. I know you won't find it easy, that you'll beat yourself up about it and convince yourself that it's wrong, that you shouldn't have feelings for someone else, you shouldn't love someone else but I want you to know that you should and it's ok.

I know that I'll always have a place in your heart but that still leaves plenty of room for someone else, for you to let someone else get to know the Aaron that only I know and, whoever that person may be will be the luckiest guy on the planet to have you as their boyfriend. Yeah, you can be hard work and a pain in the neck but you are so worth the effort. Please Aaron, if you do nothing else, promise me that when you do meet someone else, you won't push him away, you'll let him into your life with a clear conscience. This is what I want for you more than anything. When those doubts or guilty feelings come into your head, which they will do I'm sure, take this letter out and read it, remind yourself that it's ok to move on.

You've changed so much since we met, grown up a lot and become a better person, even my mum thinks the sun shines out of your backside now. Life is precious, Aaron, and no one knows how long they've got so don't waste a single minute more of yours on guilt or sorrow ok? I've had my time with you and I wouldn't change it for the world but there will be someone else who can make you happy like I did and, when he comes along, you've just got to give him a chance.

Anyway, I've said what I need to and I mean every word of it. I bet your head's all over the place and I'm sorry about that, I really am but this was the only way I could think of to get you to listen to me. So, please Aaron, think about what I've said and when the time comes, make the right decision.

Love always, your Jackson xx

The letter dropped to the floor as yet again, Aaron dissolved into floods of tears. He didn't know how long he cried, it felt like an eternity. When he eventually stopped, he felt completely washed out, completely drained. He picked the letter up off the floor and read it again. When did Jackson find the time to do this? How difficult must it have been for him to say these most private of thoughts to Joe so he could write them down for when Aaron needed them? He must have loved him a lot. He shook his head. Jackson really had been an amazing person and if Aaron needed reminding of that fact, the proof was held in his hands. He rubbed his eyes. Earlier that afternoon, he'd asked Jackson to help him, to let him know what to do, if what he was feeling was ok. Now, it looked like he had his answers. All he had to do was start to believe what Jackson was telling him, something which he didn't think would be that easy to do. Knowing what Jackson wanted for him was one thing, actually achieving it was something completely different. He stood up and took a look around the little cottage. So many memories in this small place, some good, some very bad. Holding the letter carefully, as if it was the most precious thing in the whole world, Aaron let himself out, locked the door with the spare key and pushed it back through the letter box as Hazel had requested. He set off for home, for one last chat about Flynn. Then, barring Adam all the people he cared the most about would know. What everyone else would think when they eventually found out, he didn't know and quite frankly he didn't care either. He was going to do what was right for him, just like Paddy had said.


	14. Chapter 14

**Again, I don't own any of these characters, they all belong to Emmerdale and ITV**

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><p>Aaron and Flynn hadn't seen each other for a couple of weeks. Not because they'd had a falling out or anything, they just hadn't been able to get together. Aaron had been working late a lot and Cain was nowhere near as sympathetic as he had been now Aaron was "sorted" as he put it and Flynn had been busy with his college work and had had to go away again for real this time. They'd spoken but it wasn't the same as spending time together. It had, however, given Aaron plenty of time to think about Jackson's letter. He'd read it so many times, he knew it off by heart now. It made him feel better seeing in black and white that Jackson wanted him to move on and be happy, it took away most of the guilt and knowing that some people knew about him and Flynn helped too. He didn't feel so deceitful all the time. It had also helped him to make up his mind about what he was going to do next, something he needed to talk to Flynn about. He was walking to work when his mobile rang. He looked and smiled when he saw Flynn's name.<p>

"Alright, you're early, how are you doing?"

"Fine thanks, you?"

"Yeah, good."

"Listen, what are you doing later, I wondered if you fancied getting together."

"Sounds great, Bar West again."

"No, money's a bit tight. I thought you might like to come round to mine. I could make us something to eat. Mum and Dad are away although they will be back later."

"How much later?"

"Don't worry, you'll have plenty of time to make your getaway before they get back."

"And what about your brother?"

"Well, I can ask him to stay if you want but I was hoping it could be just you and me."

"Yeah, just you and me sounds good. So, what are you planning to make?"

"Dunno, maybe a curry, maybe a chilli, you pick."

"Chilli sounds good."

"Chilli it is then. Could you grab some beers on your way round, we've nearly run out."

"Yeah, no problem. See you around seven or is that too early?"

"No, no, that's fine. See you later."

Aaron couldn't wait for the end of the day so he could see Flynn. He'd missed him and it was nice to be able to admit that and not feel bad. He looked at his watch for the umpteenth time that afternoon, still an hour to go.

"Am I keeping you?" Cain said

"You what?"

"You, looking at that watch of yours all the time. You're doing my head in."

"Sorry, just seeing how long there was to go."

"Why, got somewhere you have to be?"

"You could say that yeah."

"Well the sooner you get that finished, the sooner you can get off then. I'm sure he'll wait, whoever he is."

Aaron looked at his uncle. "Well, it doesn't take a genius to figure it out does it? You all full of smiles and happiness recently, that car that comes to pick you up every so often, all the phone calls and messages…."

"Yeah, alright, alright, no need to go on."

"Look, I don't care who you spend your time with so long as when you're here, you do what you're paid to do which is work so, go on, get on with it or you'll never get away."

Aaron pulled a face and carried on working. He didn't know that his uncle had seen him getting into Flynn's car, he'd never said anything. He wondered if anyone else had seen. Oh well, if they had, they had, he wasn't going to worry about it. It was none of their business anyway. Half an hour later, Aaron was finished.

"Right, that's done. There's no point in starting anything now is there, I mean I'll be leaving in a little while."

"Oh right, so you're making the decisions now are you?"

"No, I just thought you might let me leave early."

"Oh, did you? well I suppose you could leave early if I was feeling kind and generous"

"And are you?" Aaron couldn't keep the hopeful tone out of his voice.

"Er…no, I'm not."

Aaron's face fell. He hated his uncle at times.

Cain started to laugh. "Your face, you're so easy to wind up. Go on, go and make yourself lovely for whatever his name is before I change my mind."

"Git" Aaron mumbled under his breath.

"What was that, thank you."

"Yeah, thank you."

"Don't mention it." He watched as Aaron walked away and smiled to himself. If he had found a new fella, he was pleased for him, he deserved to be happy again.

Aaron went home, showered and got changed. He went downstairs to collect the beers out of the fridge. Paddy came in from the surgery and smiled at him.

"Well, don't you look and smell nice, seeing Flynn are we?"

"Yes, Paddy, I'm seeing Flynn" Aaron said, a slightly bored tone to his voice.

"I still can't believe it, Flynn, I mean, Flynn, after all this time. I am really pleased for you though, you do know that, don't you?"

"Yes Paddy, you keep telling me so I'm not likely to forget am I?"

"So, er, what do I call him?"

Aaron looked confused. "Well, his name's Flynn so how about you call him that."

Paddy laughed. "That's not what I meant. I mean, is he your friend, your mate, your boyfriend, what?"

That was a good question Aaron thought. Him and Flynn were definitely more than friends, boyfriends he wasn't sure about. It was heading that way. Neither of them were seeing other people, neither of them wanted to, they spent as much of their spare time together as they could. Ok, they weren't sleeping together yet but you could still be someone's boyfriend if you hadn't slept with them. He looked at Paddy.

"Why don't you just stick to Flynn" he said.

"Ok, Flynn it is. So, I suppose I'll have to learn how many sugars he takes in his tea, or does he drink coffee, or maybe he has sugar in one and not in the other or….."

"Paddy!" Aaron yelled "Will you stop going on. You're doing my head in. I wish I'd never said anything now."

"Sorry, I just want him to feel welcome, like I've taken an interest, when you eventually decide to bring him round that is."

Aaron grabbed his keys and the bag of beers, his phone was already in his pocket.

"I'll see you later, alright."

"Yeah, have a good time."

"I will. Oh and Paddy" Aaron said turning as he got to the front door, " one sugar in tea, milk and two sugars in coffee, alright?"

Paddy grinned. "I'll try to remember."

Aaron smiled and shook his head. "Yeah, you do that."

Aaron walked up the path to Flynn's house trying to ignore the butterflies in his stomach. He knocked on the door and waited. Flynn opened the door with a big smile on his face.

"Hey, come in. You remembered the beers I see." He stood to the side to let Aaron walk past him. He smelt lovely and Flynn liked a man who smelt nice. He closed the front door and turned to find Aaron still standing there, the bag containing the beers now standing on the floor. Flynn leant forward and kissed him quickly on the lips. As he moved back, Aaron moved forward and captured Flynn's lips with his own, his arms encircling Flynn's waist as he held him close. Flynn wrapped his arms around Aaron, both of them deepening the kiss, pressing their lips harder against each other. Flynn broke the kiss, stepping back slightly, smiling at Aaron.

"Well, maybe we should only see each other every couple of weeks in future if that's the greeting I'm going to get."

"No, wouldn't work for me" Aaron said smiling.

"No, me either, come to think of it. I better go and check on the food. Do you want to grab us a couple of those and put the rest in the fridge?" He walked into the kitchen, Aaron following. Aaron opened two beers and handed one to Flynn.

"Cheers. Dinner should be about ten minutes" Flynn said.

They sat at the table in the kitchen, chatting, until the food was ready, carrying on with their conversation as they ate.

"That was really good. Are you sure you made it yourself, it didn't come out of a packet or something" Aaron said.

"What, I'm insulted, of course I made it myself, check the bin if you don't believe me."

"No, you're alright, if you say you made it, I believe you. I'm just wondering if there's anything you're not good at."

Flynn looked at Aaron who blushed. "I mean, you're good at pool, you can cook, you stopped us getting lost when we were walking around that park."

Flynn smiled, slightly amused at Aaron's discomfort. He wouldn't have thought anything of the question had Aaron not blushed.

"Well, that's just something you're going to have to find out for yourself isn't it?"

"Yeah, I guess it is."

"Right, you go and make yourself comfortable, I'll stick these in the dishwasher."

Aaron went and sat down on the sofa in the living room. He hadn't told Flynn that he'd told people about them, it didn't seem right to tell him on the phone. He hoped he didn't mind and he wanted to tell him about his idea too. Flynn came in and flopped down on the sofa next to Aaron. Aaron turned to look at him. "Everything alright?" Flynn asked.

"Yeah, I just need to talk to you about something."

"Oh right" Flynn said, turning to face Aaron. "So, what is it then?"

"Well, I hope you don't mind but I've told a few people about us."

Flynn was amazed. He hadn't been expecting that.

"Oh, I, I see. When did this happen then?"

"You know when we came back here after your mate's party and had that chat, well, the day after that."

"But that was a couple of weeks ago."

"I know but I haven't seen you since then and I wanted to tell you face to face, in case you were angry."

"Why would I be angry? I'm chuffed that you've told people but I don't understand why. I thought you wanted it kept quiet."

"I did to start with but then by not saying anything, it made the whole thing seem like I was being sneaky and I didn't like it."

"So, who have you told then?"

" Paddy, Jackson's mum and Jackson."

Aaron put his eyes down. Flynn smiled. If he had had to pick the first three people Aaron would tell, they would have been his choices.

"So, what did you tell them exactly?"

"That I was seeing someone, well, that I was seeing you, that you've helped me with some stuff, you know, getting on with my life and trying to move on and that I like you a lot." Aaron smiled shyly at Flynn after the last bit of that sentence.

"Well, it's a good job I like you a lot too then, isn't it, if you've already started telling people" Flynn said, nudging his arm against Aaron's. "So what did they say, have they got little dolls of me that they're sticking pins in as we speak?"

"Actually, no. They were alright about it. They said they were happy for me."

"Well, that's good isn't it?"

"Yeah, yeah it is."

They smiled at each other. Flynn was still in a mild state of shock. Aaron had told people they were seeing each other and that he liked him a lot. Wow, what more could he ask for?

"And, there's something else. I've been thinking."

"Do you know, I thought I could smell something burning."

Aaron folded his arms in a pretend sulk. "Right, well if you're going to be like that, I won't tell you."

Flynn grinned at him. "Oh, don't be like that. Come on, I'm all ears."

"No"

"Please, you know you want to."

"No, can't be bothered now. I've lost interest."

Flynn leaned over and kissed Aarons neck just under his ear. "I'm sorry."

"How sorry?"

"Sorry enough." He placed another kiss on Aaron's neck, then another. "Please, tell me."

Aaron turned to look at him and laughed. "Alright then but one more sarcastic comment and that's it."

"Ok, I won't say another word."

"Good. Now, what I was going to say was how would you feel about coming for a drink with me in the Woolpack?"

"The Woolpack, are you sure?"

"Yeah, course I am. I wouldn't have asked otherwise would I?"

"No, I suppose not but why there?"

"Because I don't want to always have to see you somewhere away from the village. Why, don't you want to?"

"No, it's not that, it's just that's your local pub in the village where you live. Are you sure you want me there, are you sure you're ready?"

"Look, why shouldn't me and you go for a drink there? I'm not doing anything wrong by seeing you and neither are you. If people don't like it, tough. Yes, I want you there and yes I'm ready but if it's too much for you, I'll understand."

"Aaron, I don't care where I see you as long as I see you. If you're sure you're ok with it, then course I'll go for a drink with you there."

"Good. I need to do this Flynn. It's like the first step in making my two lives, the one with you and the one in the village in to one if you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I think I do. Come here" he said as he pulled Aaron into a hug. Aaron put his arms around him and hugged him back.

When they separated, Flynn checked his watch.

"Well, you've got about fifteen minutes before Mum and Dad are due back. Do you want a lift back, I've only had the one?"

"Yeah, that'd be great."

"You're going to have to meet them one day you know, especially now you've met my brother."

"I know, I just keep thinking about how you described your Dad, what did you say, he was built like ten men?"

Flynn laughed. "Yeah, something like that but he's a big pussycat really. As long as I'm happy, he's happy and so is Mum."

"And are you happy?"

"Yeah, I am, are you?"

Aaron nodded. "Yeah, for the first time in ages, I can honestly say that I am."

They kissed again. Each time it became easier, felt more natural, both of them growing more and more comfortable with what was happening between them.

Flynn drove Aaron home and pulled up outside. He turned the ignition off and turned towards Aaron. Aaron smiled at him.

"Do you want to come in for a few minutes?"

"Do you want me to?"

"Yeah, but if you have to get back, or you don't want to, that's fine."

"No, I don't have to get back. Come on then, lead the way."

He took the keys out of the ignition, got out of the car and followed Aaron towards the front door. Aaron unlocked it and they went in.

"Hey, you're back early, I wasn't expecting you for ages, how'd it….." Paddy's voice trailed off as he saw Aaron and Flynn standing in the kitchen.

"Paddy, this is Flynn, Flynn, Paddy."

Flynn held out his hand. "Nice to meet you."

Paddy shook his hand. "Yeah, you too. Can I get you a drink, tea or coffee seeing as you're driving?"

"Yeah, coffee would be nice."

"Milk and two sugars, right?"

Flynn laughed and looked at Aaron. "Somebody's been talking about me then, have they?"

"Just a little bit. You know Aaron, he doesn't say a great deal."

"Oh, I don't know. When we were out recently, I got a whole four or five sentences out of him in one go."

"Flipping heck, you did do well."

"Er, when you two have quite finished. We'll be in there Paddy, when the drinks are ready. You don't need to ask what I want."

Paddy grinned. "No I don't."

When Flynn left about an hour later, he couldn't believe the night he'd just had. Not only had Aaron told him that he'd told people about them, he'd asked him to have a drink with him in his local pub and invited him in to meet Paddy. Who'd have thought it? He certainly hadn't expected anything like this, not yet anyway. Something had changed in Aaron, it was like he was more at peace with himself, with them, and as far as Flynn was concerned, long may it continue.

Back inside, Aaron was about to go to bed. "Thanks Paddy, for being so nice to Flynn."

"No problem, he's a really nice lad isn't he?"

"Yeah, yeah he is."

"I'm glad you brought him back."

"Yeah, me too. I'll see you in the morning."

"Yeah, see you tomorrow."

Aaron went upstairs and lay on his bed. Bringing Flynn back really hadn't been that bad. Him and Paddy had got on well and Aaron hadn't felt uncomfortable at all, well, not after the first five minutes or so. He thought back to Paddy's question from earlier about what he should call Flynn. After tonight, boyfriend was definitely the closest of the options.


	15. Chapter 15

**More characters in this chapter, again all belonging to Emmerdale and ITV**

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><p>To coin a phrase, Flynn was bricking it. He was on his way to the village to meet Aaron for their drink in the pub and, although he'd had a few days to get used to the idea, it didn't stop him from being really nervous. That's why he'd decided to get the bus over. It meant he could have a drink, he was hoping it would steady his nerves. He wasn't just nervous for himself though, he was nervous for Aaron too. This was a massive step for him to take and any bad reactions would undo all the progress that Aaron had made so far, not to mention any potential damage it might cause them and their new relationship. Flynn just wanted people to give him a chance, to get to know him, then if they didn't like him, that was fair enough. Jackson's shoes were big shoes to fill and he was feeling the pressure. He got off the bus and stood for a couple of minutes collecting his thoughts. He had to put his own fears aside for Aaron's sake. After all, he didn't live here, he could leave tonight and never have to come back but Aaron did live here and if it all went pear shaped, there was no escape for him. There was a bit of a chill in the air. Flynn was glad, he could blame his shivering on the weather.<p>

He put his hands in his jacket pockets and walked slowly down the road towards the pub, his eyes on the floor. He felt like a condemned man on his way to the gallows.

"Blimey, if you walked any slower, you'd be at a complete standstill." Flynn looked up to see Aaron sitting on one of the wooden tables outside the pub, his feet resting on the bench. Aaron smiled at him and Flynn smiled back.

"What are you doing out here, I thought we were meeting inside."

"We were but that was before I saw how many people were in there. I couldn't let you walk in to face that lot. It'd be like one of those old western films where a stranger walks into a bar and everything goes silent while they all turn and stare at him."

Flynn swallowed and took a deep breath. "Oh right, busy is it?"

Aaron laughed. "I haven't got a clue mate, I haven't been in. It could be packed, there could be just one man and his dog for all I know."

"Oh, you're just hilarious you are, aren't you."

"I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. It's just your face, you look so scared. We're only going for a drink, you know."

"I know but aren't you nervous at all?"

Aaron shrugged and pulled a face. "I was about half an hour ago but I'm not now." He got off the table and walked towards Flynn. He stood in front of him, put his arms either side of Flynn's waist and looked him straight in the eyes. "Look, I'm sorry about winding you up but we've got nothing to be nervous about, we're not doing anything wrong. I can have a drink with whoever I want, wherever I want and I want to have a drink with you, here, so what do you say?"

Flynn smiled at Aaron. "Well, I'm here now so why not?"

Aaron leant forward and kissed him, softly, tenderly.

"Come on then, first round's on me."

They walked into the pub, Aaron in front, Flynn following. There were a few of the regulars in, all of them stared at Aaron and his new friend. They walked up to the bar where Diane was waiting for them. "Two bottles of lager please" Aaron said. As they stood with their arms resting on the bar, Flynn leant sideways gently against Aaron before moving away again. It was just a small gesture of reassurance that he hoped Aaron would pick up on. Aaron looked at him and smiled. Message received and understood. Diane put the two bottles in front of them and Aaron handed her the money. "Nice to see you out and about Aaron. Maybe we'll see some more of you now and your friend too of course." Flynn smiled at her. "Yeah, maybe you will" Aaron said. They picked up their drinks and sat at a table.

"So, wasn't so difficult was it?" Aaron said.

"No, easiest thing I've ever done" Flynn said sarcastically. "So, you still ok?"

"Yeah, no problem. Cheers." They tapped their bottles together. They began to relax and were soon chatting away and laughing as they usually did. Flynn leant forward.

"Don't look now but there's a little old lady in the corner looking daggers at me." Aaron turned round in his chair to see who Flynn could mean. "Oh, that's Pearl. You'll probably find the looks are aimed at me. She had a real soft spot for Jackson, she treated him almost like a grandson."

"So, she won't be my number one fan then."

"You've already got a number one fan."

"Oh, I have, have I and who's that then?"

Aaron just smiled at him and he smiled back.

The door opened and Adam walked in. "Pint please" he said looking round the pub to see who was in. He saw Aaron first, then he saw who he was sitting with. Bloody hell, that was Flynn, wasn't it? He smiled. Well, well, well the sly old devil, he'd kept that quiet. He picked up his pint and wandered over.

"Alright lads, mind if I join you or would you rather be on your own?"

"Just sit down, muppet" Aaron said. Adam sat down grinning.

"Alright Flynn, Nice to see you again pal."

"Yeah, you too."

"So, this explains a lot. Come on then, I want all the details from the beginning."

"D'you know what, I've changed my mind, we would rather be on our own." Aaron said.

"Oh come on, you don't mean that." Aaron just raised his eyebrows.

"So Flynn, are you still beating him at pool and is he still sulking when he loses?"

"Er, I don't sulk, thank you very much."

"Flynn, help me out here, tell the truth. Does he sulk when he loses?" Adam and Aaron both looked at him.

"Well, you do kind of sulk when you lose and you do this thing with your mouth…."

"And just whose side are you on" Aaron said as Adam burst out laughing. The three of them carried on with the talking and the good natured teasing and Adam and Flynn talked like they'd known each other forever. Aaron caught Adam's eye and smiled gratefully at his mate. Adam smiled and winked at him.

"So, how are you at darts Flynn?"

"Yeah, not bad. I'm a bit rusty, haven't played in a while."

"Oh, so there might be something you're not good at, then" Aaron said smiling at Flynn who raised his eyebrows and smiled back.

"Oh god, you haven't got private jokes already have you? I might as well get the next round in" Adam said.

"No, I'll go" said Flynn "Same again is it?" They both nodded.

Aaron and Adam looked at each other and smiled.

"Well, you're a dark horse aren't you? When did that start up again?"

"A few months ago. Look, I would have told you but I've hardly seen you and I'm still trying to get used to the idea myself."

"Yeah, I bet you are. Honestly though mate, I'm really pleased for you. I always thought he was alright."

"Yeah, I know you did and thanks, you know, for coming over and talking to us."

"Hey, no need to thank me. I'm not going to ignore my best mate now am I? Besides, like I said, I like Flynn."

"Well you do know you're not his type, don't you?"

"Er, yeah, I got that the first time I met him when he only had eyes for you."

"Behave yourself."

Flynn returned at that point with their drinks. They had a few games of darts and both Flynn and Aaron felt completely relaxed. They were back at their table chatting when Adam saw Hazel come in. His expression changed instantly and both Aaron and Flynn noticed.

"What is it?" Aaron said.

"It's er Hazel. She's just come in and she's seen us."

Aaron and Flynn looked at each other. They felt like all eyes in the pub were on them. They both smiled nervously at each other. This could be interesting.

Hazel had seen them as soon as she came in, laughing, talking, enjoying themselves. She felt a sense of loss wash over her. Jackson should be over there sitting with them, not Flynn. She knew what she had to do but it wasn't going to be easy. She had said she would support Aaron though and that was what she was going to do. She composed herself and marched over to the table where they were sitting. "Alright lads" she said. They all smiled but none of them knew what to say next. "Don't worry, I'm not stopping. You don't want someone like me sitting with three good looking lads like you do you, well, two good looking lads and you Aaron." Aaron pulled a face and Adam and Flynn smiled.

"You're welcome to join us if you want, save you drinking on your own" Aaron said.

Hazel didn't really want to but she didn't want it to look like she had a problem with the situation either.

"Alright then but just til someone my own age comes in, ok?"

"Well, Pearl's in the corner if you want someone your own age" Aaron said grinning.

"Oi, cheeky, feeling brave cos you've got your mates around you are you? They won't save you, you know."

Flynn watched the exchange between Hazel and Aaron with interest. Behind the teasing, there was obviously a genuine affection between them, not surprising considering what they'd both been through.

"Er, can I get you a drink?" Flynn asked. Aaron and Adam both looked at Hazel.

"Oh, er, yeah alright, I'll have a small white wine, thanks."

"Right, back in a minute then."

"I'm just off to the loo" Adam said.

Aaron and Hazel smiled at each other. "Thank you, for sitting with us. I know it's not easy."

"Well, we don't want to give this lot in here something else to gossip about, do we? Besides, I told you, if you're ready to move on, I'm happy for you and I'm getting a free drink as well so every cloud as they say."

Aaron laughed. Flynn came back with Hazel's drink.

"So, everyone treating you alright Flynn. Is he looking after you?"

"Yeah, so far so good."

"Good, pleased to hear it."

Gradually, the conversation picked up pace as the initial awkwardness passed. Bob came by with some glasses in his hand. "Alright lads" he said. "Hazel, I'm on my break now, fancy joining me if I can tear you away."

"Oh, let me see, staying with these two plus Adam whenever he gets back or going with one middle aged man. Tough choice but you just win Bob, only because your conversation is slightly better than theirs. Right, nice to have met you Flynn, see you again maybe."

"Yeah, nice to have met you too."

"See you around Aaron."

"Yeah, see you soon" he said.

When she left, Flynn put his hand on Aaron's. "You ok?" he said.

"Shouldn't it be me asking you that? You re the one who's just had to sit and chat with Jackson's mum."

" Well, I survived didn't I? It was easier than talking to you that night in Bar West, believe me."

Aaron smiled. "So, are you ok?" Flynn asked again.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Good."

"Aaah, look at you two. I leave you alone for a few minutes and you're already holding hands" Adam said as he sat back down again. "Where's Hazel?"

"Gone for a drink with Bob."

"Right, so whose round is it then? Aaron, it must be yours."

Aaron got up to get the drinks.

"Thanks, Adam, you know, for not making things difficult tonight. It was really important to Aaron to do this. It was his idea."

"Hey, look, you don't need to explain. Aaron doesn't do anything he doesn't want to do. If you're here, it's because he wants you to be. As long as he's happy, then whatever he does is fine by me. Fancy another game of darts."

"Yeah, go on then."

While Aaron was waiting to be served, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned round expecting to see Flynn or Adam but instead he was facing his mum. "And where have you been hiding? I haven't seen you in ages."

"Er, I've been busy, you know how it is. Listen, I need to talk to you."

"Oh yeah, what about?"

Aaron nodded over to where Flynn was playing darts with Adam. "About him."

Chas looked over in the direction Aaron was looking. Her chin nearly hit the floor. "Is that who I think it is?"

"Er yeah, it is"

"Right, you. I want details, all of them and I want them now."

Aaron laughed. "No chance. We're seeing each other, I like him and that's as much as you're getting."

"Spoilsport. Still, it's more than you usually tell me. Well go on, bring him over then, let me say hello."

Aaron groaned. "Do I have to?"

"Either you bring him over or I'll go over there myself, your choice."

"Ok, back in a minute."

He walked over and grabbed Flynn's arm. "Mum wants to say hello. It's better if we get it over with, hopefully, she'll leave us alone then."

Flynn took a deep breath. "Right, let's go then."

They walked back over to where Chas was waiting. "Mum, Flynn, Flynn, Mum."

"Hi, nice to meet you" Flynn said.

"You too love. So, you're the reason he's been smiling so much recently are you?"

"Mum!" Aaron said.

"I don't know, am I?" Flynn said looking at Aaron. Aaron just smiled.

"Well, as long as he's happy, I'm happy so whatever you're doing, keep it up"

Aaron groaned. "What have I said now?" Chas said.

"Nothing. Can we go now only Flynn's got to get the last bus."

"Yeah, course you can."

Having said goodbye to Adam, they left the pub to walk up the road together to the bus stop.

"Sorry about Mum."

Flynn smiled. "You've got nothing to be sorry for. You never answered her question though."

"What question?"

"About whether I'm the reason you've been smiling so much recently."

"You might be, you might not."

Flynn took Aaron's hand in his as they strolled slowly, enjoying the peace and quiet. When they got to the little shelter, they let go of each other's hands and sat down next to each other.

"So, wasn't too bad was it?" Aaron said.

"No, actually it was alright. Adam's a good laugh isn't he?"

"Yeah, he's sound. Look, thanks again for doing this."

"Not a problem. I had a good time. Did you?"

"Yeah, I did and now we've got the first time out of the way, it'll be easier next time."

"Oh, so there'll be a next time will there?"

"There better be" Aaron replied looking at Flynn.

He reached out and placed his hand against Flynn's cheek, his fingers gently tracing along the outline of Flynn's jaw before moving to the back of his neck to pull him into a kiss. Flynn kissed Aaron back, his tongue playing games with Aaron's tongue, his fingers stroking the back of Aaron's neck just under his hairline. The sound of the bus coming around the corner made them stop just in time, a few seconds later and Flynn would have said sod the bus, he'd get home another way. They said their goodbyes and Flynn got on the bus. Both of them went home that night very happy boys and feeling even closer than they had when the night had begun.


	16. Chapter 16

**Thank you to everyone who has read my story so far. Your comments and support are very much appreciated.**

* * *

><p>A couple of weeks had now gone by since the night of their visit to Emmerdale to mix with the locals as a couple for the first time. It had gone so well that they'd been back a few times since and still no one had said anything bad or made things awkward for them. They'd had a great night the other night at Aaron's place with Paddy and Marlon, the four of them eating pizza, drinking beers and playing a few games on the x box. When it was time to leave to catch the bus home, Flynn really hadn't wanted to go and Aaron hadn't wanted him to go either. That had surprised them both when they told each other at the bus stop. Everything was falling into place, slowly but surely they were both getting to where they wanted to be with each other which was why Aaron was concerned that he couldn't get hold of Flynn. He'd tried calling a few times and it rang and rang before switching to voicemail. He'd left a couple of messages, sent a couple of texts but that hadn't got a response either. It didn't make sense, something must be wrong. Aaron's initial concern had now turned to genuine worry. Flynn knew how Aaron felt about unreturned calls or texts and there's no way he wouldn't reply unless he couldn't.<p>

He tried one more time quietly saying come on, come on, pick up as it rang and rang. Suddenly a voice answered but it wasn't Flynn. "Hello" it said.

"Er, hi, it's Aaron. Who's this?"

"Aaron, hi it's Harrison. How are you?"

"Where's Flynn?" Aaron said ignoring the question. "I've been trying to get hold of him all day. Has something happened? Is he alright?"

"Yes and no. Don't panic, the stupid prat went and fell down the stairs this morning and hurt his ankle. Mum and dad are at the hospital with him, they thought it was best to get it x-rayed. It swelled up like a balloon. He must have left his phone here, I've only just walked through the door myself."

The relief that Aaron felt was overwhelming. Thank god that's all it was. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself down.

"Look, shall I get him to call you when he gets back. I know the NHS is slow but he can't be that much longer."

"Yeah, thanks, that'd be great."

"No problem, see you then."

"Yeah, see you."

He ended the call. Oh well, nothing he could do now except wait for Flynn to call. He hoped it was soon.

About an hour later, he was in his bedroom when his mobile rang. He grabbed it to see Flynn's name flashing on the display.

"Hi, Flynn?" he said.

"Hi, handsome, how are you?"

"Better now I know what's wrong with you. I was going out of me head wondering what was going on."

"Yeah, sorry about that, I didn't have my phone. It must have got left behind in the panic." Flynn's voice was different, Aaron could tell he was in pain, there was a lot of sighing and deep breathing.

"So, how are you, is it broken?"

"No, just a bad sprain. It's strapped up, I've got to keep my weight off it for a few days to let the swelling go down so I've got crutches. Give it a week or two and it should be as good as new."

"Right, ok. How painful is it?"

"On a scale of 1 to 10, at the moment about 8 but they've given me some painkillers if I need them."

"How do you feel about having a visitor?"

"Depends who that visitor is, I suppose" said Flynn.

"Me, you idiot, who else would it be?"

"Aaron, I'd love to see you especially after the day I've had, I could do with a hug, but mum and dad are here so…."

"Well, like you said, I've got to meet them sooner or later haven't I?"

"What, really?"

"Yes, really. I'll be over as soon as I can, ok?"

"Right, see you later then."

Aaron took a deep breath. Flynn had met Paddy and his mum so it was only right that he should meet Flynn's parents especially as he wasn't planning on letting Flynn go any time soon. He had a shower, put on some clean jeans and a jumper and some of the aftershave that he knew Flynn liked him wearing. With his phone in his pocket, he went to grab his jacket and his keys. He took his jacket off the peg and put it on the table.

"Alright, where are you off to?" Paddy said.

"Going to see Flynn, he's sprained his ankle and he's on crutches."

"Ow, painful, give him my best wishes won't you?"

Aaron was looking around for his keys, he couldn't find them.

"What are you looking for?" Paddy said.

"My keys, I know they're here somewhere."

"What the keys that are right in front of you, where they always are, those keys?"

"Yeah, they're the ones." He picked them up and headed towards the door.

"Aaron" Paddy called after him." Jacket" he said holding it out to him.

"Oh, cheers Paddy."

"Is it just me or are you not quite with it tonight."

Aaron put his keys down to put his jacket on. "Sorry, it's just Flynn's parents are going to be there and I've never met them before, I'm all over the place."

"Just calm down, it'll be fine."

"But you know how I feel about the whole meeting the parents thing."

"Yeah I do, must be serious if you're prepared to put yourself through that."

"Yeah it is but I don't know, I'm not much of a talker am I and I'll probably just say the wrong thing like I usually do. What if they don't like me or they think I'm not good enough for him."

"Aaron, you can stop thinking like that for a start! Flynn likes you a lot, anyone can see that. He thinks you're good enough for him, and once they've met you and get to know you, his parents will too, trust me. Besides, who can resist this little face of yours" he said squeezing Aaron's cheeks.

"Get off." Aaron said. "I'll see you later."

"Aaron, forgot something?" Paddy said holding Aaron's keys in his hand.

Aaron smiled, grabbed his keys and dashed out of the door. He hoped this went well. What was that saying Paddy used to try and drum into him you never get a second chance to make a first impression. He had to make sure that Flynn's parents' first impressions of him were good. He just wanted them to like him.

He walked up the path to Flynn's house and knocked on the door wondering who was going to answer it. The door opened and he looked up to see Harrison smiling at him.

"Hi Aaron, come on in."

"Cheers" he said stepping inside. "How is he?"

"Milking it for all it's worth. I know it's painful but you'd have thought he was the only person in the world to have suffered from a sprained ankle." Aaron laughed.

"By the way, don't look so nervous, you'll be fine. As parents go, they're ok. He's in the living room."

Aaron smiled and walked in to the living room where Flynn was sitting on the sofa with his foot propped up on a couple of cushions, the crutches next to him on the floor.

"You know, if you didn't want to see me for a couple of days, you only had to say, you didn't have to go this far." Aaron smiled at Flynn who beamed back at him. "So, how are you doing?" he said, perching on the edge of the sofa facing Flynn.

"Ok, I suppose. I'm glad to see you, though." He held out his hand and Aaron took it and squeezed it. "Yeah, well, I'm pleased to see you too. So, where are they then?"

"Well, if by they, you mean his parents, his mum's in the kitchen and I'm right behind you."

Aaron pulled a face that only Flynn could see, Flynn just laughed." Great timing as always dad. This is Aaron."

Aaron stood up and turned around. Flynn had been lying, his dad wasn't as big as ten men, more like fifteen, he was huge, tall as well as broad. He held out his hand. "Nice to meet you Aaron." Aaron shook his hand and said "Nice to meet you too. Sorry about that."

"Don't worry about it." he said smiling at him. He sat down in an armchair and looked straight at Aaron. "So, what do you do to keep out of trouble then, do you work?"

"Er yeah I'm a mechanic."

"Great, a useful job. I told him to find someone with a skill, you know, electrician, plumber, mechanic. They're always handy to know, never know when you might need their help."

"Yeah, I suppose so."

"Where do you live then, Aaron."

"Emmerdale."

"Lived there long?"

"A few years now. Most of my family are there, it's nice I like it."

"I always fancied living in a village but the wife likes to be in town. She can't be without her coffee shops and shopping centres."

Flynn's mum came in at that point, smiling at Aaron.

"Hello love, nice to meet you at long last. Flynn's told us a bit about you." Aaron looked at Flynn with raised eyebrows. Flynn smiled sheepishly and put his head down.

" And as for you, leave him alone, stop interrogating him, he's here to see Flynn, not us. Can I get you a drink or anything?"

"No, thanks, I'm fine. Thanks anyway." Aaron said.

"Right, come on you, we're going out for dinner. There's a pizza in the freezer if you two want it."

"Thanks mum" said Flynn.

Flynn's dad climbed out of the chair and smiled again at Aaron. "Nice to have met you, son. See you again if we haven't scared you off."

"No, no, you'll see me again." Aaron said smiling back at him.

When they'd gone, Aaron collapsed into the chair that a few minutes ago, Flynn's dad had been sitting in. Flynn was looking at him, waiting for him to say something.

"Oh my god, you weren't kidding about the size of your dad were you?"

"Told you he was big but I also told you he was a pussycat. I'm impressed by the way, I think they like you."

"And you can tell that how?"

"Well, mum took dad out of the way for a start. She only takes him away from people if she likes them, otherwise she leaves them to dad's endless questions until they bolt for the door and freedom. Plus, he called you son, I've never heard him call anyone that before so looks like you can relax, you passed with flying colours."

"Thank god for that. So, what have you been saying about me then?"

"Nothing for you to worry about."

"Not good enough, come on, spill."

Flynn sighed. "Ok, I just told them I'd been seeing you for a few months and I like you a lot but that you're a bit shy so they probably wouldn't meet you for a while."

Aaron stared at him.

"What? It was either that or tell them that you were too scared to meet them."

Aaron nodded. "Ok, I can live with being described as shy."

"Good, I'm pleased to hear it."

"So, I don't know about you but I need a drink, do you want one?"

"Yeah but just something soft. I've taken some of those painkillers."

Aaron got up and went to go into the kitchen.

"Er, haven't you forgotten something?"

"I don't know, have I?"

"You haven't said hello to me properly yet."

Aaron smiled, leant down and kissed Flynn slowly and tenderly on the lips. "Sorry, hello" he said.

Flynn smiled. "Stick that pizza in the oven if you want while you're in there."

"Anything else or is that it?"

"That's it, for the moment."

Aaron put the pizza in the oven and was just getting him and Flynn a drink when Harrison came in.

"So, you' re still alive then, that's a good sign."

Aaron laughed. "Yeah, so far so good."

"I'm off out so I'll see you later."

"Ok mate."

"Flynn, I'm off out" Harrison shouted from the doorway. "When I get back, shall I phone when I'm outside before I come in, give you time to sort yourselves out so I don't disturb you again."

"Yeah, yeah, very funny. Just shut the door on your way out."

Harrison smiled at Aaron and left. Aaron brought their drinks in to the living room.

"There's beer there if you want one" Flynn said noticing Aaron had a soft drink too.

"No, no fun drinking on your own, is it?"

Flynn tried to sit up a bit, wincing in pain as he did so. "You ok?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah, I will be when these painkillers kick in. Why don't you stick the telly on, see if you can find us something good to watch."

"Are you going to be barking orders at me all night or just some of it?"

"Sorry, I would get up and do it myself but…."

"Yeah alright, alright, I get it."

They ate the pizza watching the football match that was on the telly. Aaron had taken the plates into the kitchen to put in the dishwasher and to get them both another drink. When he came back into the living room, Flynn said "You know, if you sat down next to me, I could get rid of these cushions and rest my foot on your lap."

"Won't it hurt when you try to move it."

"Don't know til I try. What do you say, fancy being my foot rest for a little while. Please."

"The things I do for you. Come on then, let's give it a go."

Flynn swung his leg off the sofa, Aaron got rid of the cushions and sat down as Flynn moved his leg back and rested it on Aaron's lap.

"How was that, sore?"

"Yeah but not as bad as I thought. I think the painkillers are working."

Aaron rested both his hands on Flynn's leg, avoiding his swollen ankle. "Comfortable?" he said.

"Yeah, you?" Flynn replied, putting his hand on top of Aaron's.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

They sat there watching the TV, both happy to be together. After a few minutes, Aaron glanced over at Flynn to see that he was asleep. Aaron smiled to himself. He couldn't remember the last time he'd been this happy. Looking at Flynn, he realised how strong his feelings for him really were. It had just kind of crept up on him but he was already at the stage where he couldn't imagine not being with him. He wondered whether Flynn felt the same way. He knew that in the beginning Flynn's feelings were stronger than his own but maybe that had changed now. He turned back to the TV. Maybe he'd find out one day.

He felt Flynn move and looked to see Flynn's brown eyes looking at him. He smiled at Aaron.

"Sorry, I must have dropped off. Have I been asleep long?"

Aaron checked his watch. "About three quarters of an hour."

Flynn sighed. "Can't seem to keep my eyes open. Those tablets must be strong."

"Yeah, must be. Look, I'm really sorry but I need the loo."

"Right." Flynn moved his leg again and Aaron moved as quickly as he could to put the cushions back for Flynn to rest his leg on.

"Back in a minute."

When he got back, Flynn was asleep again. He sat in the chair, watching Flynn sleep for a while. He looked so peaceful, so relaxed. The quiet was interrupted by the front door opening and Flynn's parents came back in. They smiled at Aaron who smiled back at them.

"How's he been? Had you running around after him, I bet" Flynn's mum said.

"No, not really. He's ok, he's asleep. The tablets seem to have knocked him out."

"Do you want a lift back home Aaron?" Flynn's dad said

"No, you're alright. I can get the bus" Aaron said putting his jacket on.

"Are you sure? It's no problem."

"Maybe another time. Will you tell Flynn I'll speak to him tomorrow?"

"Yeah, course we will."

Aaron left to get the bus home. Flynn's parents closed the front door behind him and looked at each other.

"What do you think, he's a bit serious, isn't he?" Flynn's dad said.

"Well, he was nervous wasn't he? Imagine being faced by you if you were him. I like him and I'm not normally wrong am I? I never liked that Matt and I was proved right."

"True, true. I guess time will tell won't it?"


	17. Chapter 17

It was official. He, Flynn Buchanan, was absolutely, completely, 100%, head over heels in love with Aaron Livesy. If his life was a Disney film, there would be lots of cute little animals all singing a song to him while the sun shone and he would be sitting there with a huge cheesy grin on his face. The reality was it was three weeks before Christmas, grey, cold and wet. The only thing that was accurate was the huge cheesy grin on his face. He had thought he loved Matt but what he felt for him was nowhere near what he felt for Aaron, it didn't even come close. He hadn't told Aaron, of course, he wasn't brave enough for that but admitting it to himself was a big step. He knew that Aaron's feelings towards him were changing too. Whether he loved him or not, he didn't know but they were definitely changing, he could tell. The way he looked at him, the way they kissed now. A few times recently, things had become quite heated between them but they'd always stopped before it went too far. Flynn had always been so careful when he touched Aaron, always making sure it was somewhere safe like the back of his neck, around his waist and always through his clothes. In all the time they had been seeing each other, he'd never touched Aaron's bare skin, always aware that he didn't want to freak him out, waiting until Aaron was ready. They were getting there, both of them knew it, it was just a matter of time and time was something they both had plenty of. He smiled again. He was meeting Aaron later to do some Christmas shopping and then they were going for a drink. He couldn't wait.

Aaron was at home thinking about Flynn and Jackson, the two men in his life. He was never the quickest to pick up on things but it had only just dawned on him how similar they both were. Not physically of course but personality wise. Both were caring, kind, loving, considerate, gentle and always put him first, always made him feel special. He'd been thinking about Flynn and how he felt about him, about whether he was ready to take the next step. His body was telling him he was, in fact it wasn't just telling him, it was screaming at the top of its voice every time they were close to each other. He certainly liked him enough, in fact like might not be quite the right word. The problem as always with Aaron was in his head. If he took that next step, slept with Flynn, it would be like the final full stop on the sentence that said Jackson I've moved on and he didn't know if he was ready to completely let go of Jackson like that. Also, if he was honest, he was scared. He just didn't know if he could do the things with Flynn that he'd only done before with Jackson, if he could be that intimate with another person.

He got up off the bed, went to the wardrobe, took out a box and carried it over to where he had been sitting before. This box was probably the most precious thing he owned because it was full of memories of Jackson. He took the lid off and began to rummage through it. It contained all sorts of stuff. The tickets from the football match they'd been to, a bar mat with the Bar West logo on it that he'd picked up the first night he and Jackson had had a proper date there. There were photos of the holiday. He picked one up to look at, the one of him, Jackson and a fish that he'd caught. He smiled, fish had featured a lot on that holiday for some reason. He put it back and carried on looking. There was a valentine card that Jackson had given him just to embarrass him because, back then, he didn't do feelings or public displays of affection. He shook his head, what an idiot he'd been, all those wasted opportunities to show Jackson what he'd meant to him. Still, if Jackson had taught him anything, it was that it was ok to show your feelings and he would never make the same mistakes again. There was Jackson's letter next to the speech he had written for his funeral. Paddy had thought it would be a good idea to write it down in case he forgot but once he started talking, he didn't need it. It was easy to say how much he loved him and how much he would miss him. If anyone had kept their emotions in check before he started speaking, there wasn't a dry eye in the place once he'd stopped.

He found what he was looking for and took it out, another folded up piece of paper. It contained the words of a song that Hazel had had played at Jackson's funeral. She'd spoken to Aaron about it, about how fitting the words were but Aaron was barely functioning back then and hadn't really understood. A few weeks after, he'd heard it again, listened to the words and realised that Hazel had been right. He'd printed the lyrics off some website and every so often he would read them. In the beginning they'd made him sad, now, they just summed up exactly what Jackson meant to him and they sort of gave him strength too just like Jackson's letter did. He unfolded the paper and read the words to himself one more time:

When I think back on these times and the dreams we left behind

I'll be glad cause I was blessed to get, to have you in my life

When I look back on these days I'll look and see your face

You were right there for me

In my dreams I'll always see you soar above the sky

In my heart there will always be a place for you for all my life

I'll keep a part of you with me and everywhere I am there you'll be.

Well you showed me how it feels, to feel the sky within my reach

And I always will remember all the strength you gave to me

Your love made me make it through, Oh I owe so much to you.

You were right there for me

Cause I always saw in you my light, my strength

And I want to thank you now for all the ways you were right there for me, for always.

He wiped away a tear. Soppy git he said to himself. It was true though, everywhere he went, he would always keep a part of Jackson with him even when he was with Flynn. He picked up the holiday photo of him and Jackson again. "See, I'm not scared to show my feelings anymore am I? That's your fault. I still miss you, you know, even though I'm with Flynn but I know you'd be happy for me. I just can't quite let you go yet but, when I do, I hope you won't mind." He kissed the photo and put it back in the box before putting the box back where it came from. He looked at his watch and smiled. Time to go and meet Flynn.

They met in town and gave each other a quick hug. It was freezing cold, the sort of day where you only went out if you had to.

"Alright then" Flynn said.

"I hate Christmas and I hate shopping so what do you think?"

"Bah, humbug to you too."

Aaron smiled. "Come on, the sooner we get this over with, the sooner we can go and have a drink. So, do you need to get anything?"

"No, I'm all done mate. Can't be doing with rushing around at the last minute."

"Last minute, there's three weeks to go."

"Well, I can't help it if I'm organised. Actually, there is one present I've got left to buy, yours."

"Mine?"

"Well yeah but you're not the easiest person to buy for are you? You'll have to give me some ideas."

Aaron smiled. "Come on then, you can just carry the bags."

"Glad I've got my uses." Flynn said.

They pushed their way through the crowds along with the hundreds of other people and went into a department store, Aaron's theory being that if he could get everything in the one shop, they could be away from here pretty quickly. They were standing waiting for a lift when Aaron felt something bang off his legs and a little voice said "Aaron, Aaron."

He looked down to see Josh, Jackson's brother clinging on to his legs for dear life. He bent down and scooped him up into his arms. "Hey, where did you spring from?"

"Something you'd like to tell me?" Flynn asked with a smile on his face.

"This is Josh, Jackson's brother."

"Hi Josh" Flynn said. Josh just smiled before burying his head into Aaron's shoulder. Aaron noticed he had something small held in his hand. "What you got there then Josh?"

"Car" he said holding it out for them to look at.

"Wow, that's so much nicer than his one" Aaron said nodding his head towards Flynn. Josh held his car out to Flynn. "Look, car" he said.

Flynn laughed. "It's great, I wish I had one like that." Josh was laughing, relaxing a little bit. Aaron looked around the shop. "So, where's mummy and daddy then?"

"Here" said Jerry, who'd only been standing a few feet away all the time.

"Alright" Aaron said.

"Yeah, you?"

"Yeah, fine" he said handing Josh back to his dad.

"Good, I'm pleased to hear it. So, first Christmas without him, it's going to be tough."

Flynn put his head down and stepped back a bit feeling like an intruder.

"Yeah it will be. Bet he's excited though, he'll keep you busy."

Jerry smiled. " You're not wrong there. Anyway, come on you, let's go find mummy. Say bye."

Josh waved and Aaron waved back. Flynn moved to stand by his side and brushed Aaron's hand with his.

"You ok?"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Come on, these presents won't buy themselves will they?" He looked at Flynn who smiled at him and he smiled back. What he wanted to do was give him a quick kiss for being so nice to him just like any couple would do but because he was with his boyfriend and not his girlfriend he couldn't. It was so unfair, so frustrating at times.

He managed to get the presents he wanted, except for Flynn's of course and with the bags safely stashed in Flynn's car, they were now sitting in Bar West. Aaron was a bit quiet. Flynn put his hand on Aaron's leg. "Penny for them" he said.

Aaron smiled. "I was just thinking about what Jerry said, about this being the first Christmas without Jackson. I hadn't really thought about it before."

"The first one's always the toughest" Flynn said.

Aaron nodded his head.

"I just wish you were going to be here." Flynn was going away for Christmas.

"Me too but I'll be back for New Years Eve and you can talk to me whenever you want, you know that."

"It's not the same though is it? I'll miss you."Aaron put his head down, not looking at Flynn anymore.

"I'll miss you too but I'm not going for a couple of weeks and I'm not looking at that miserable face from now until then. Come on, I'll let you beat me at pool, just this once though."

Aaron smiled at him, leant over and kissed him. "Thank you, for everything."

"All part of the service. Come on, before someone else gets on the table."

After a few games of pool, Aaron's mood had improved and he was back to himself.

"Fancy going for a pizza, I'm paying."

"You're paying, right, I'll get my coat now."

"Cheeky sod."

"So, what's the occasion?"

"Does there have to be one? I can buy my boyfriend something to eat if I want can't I?"

Flynn looked at him.

"What?" Aaron said.

"It's just, it's just you said boyfriend. You've never called me that before"

"Well, that's what you are aren't you? Aaron said smiling at him. "Come on before I change my mind about paying."

They'd gone back to Aaron's place after they'd eaten and spent some time playing on the x box before it was time for Flynn to go home. They'd just got to the front door when Aaron pulled Flynn close, their lips finding each other as they melted into their kiss. Suddenly, Flynn found himself being gently backed against the wall, Aaron's tongue begging for entry in to his mouth, his hands resting against Flynn's chest. Flynn met Aaron's tongue with his own and ran his hands slowly up and down Aaron's back before pushing them into the back pockets of Aaron's jeans. He pulled Aaron against him and held him there, kissing him slowly and deeply. Flynn gasped as Aaron moved his mouth away from his and started placing little kisses down his neck. Aaron's mouth was soon back on his before he suddenly pulled away and rested his forehead against Flynn's, eyes closed. They both waited for their breathing to return to normal, to calm down again in every sense of the phrase. Aaron opened his eyes, stepped back, looked at Flynn and then walked off in to the kitchen without saying a word. Flynn put his head back against the wall, shut his eyes and waited for a minute or so before walking into the kitchen to find Aaron. He was standing with his back to him by the sink.

"I thought you said your running days were over." he said

"Well, I didn't run far this time did I?"

"No, that's true."

Aaron turned around. "I'm sorry, I don't know what to say. I didn't mean for that to happen, to get carried away like that."

"I know, neither did I but it was bound to happen sooner or later. We've been seeing each other for months, this has been building for a long time."

"I know, I know."

Flynn took a couple of steps closer, standing in front of Aaron but not too close.

"Aaron, talk to me. What's really wrong?"

"I'm scared. I like you so much but I'm scared of what happens next."

Flynn thought very carefully about his choice of words before speaking. The last thing he wanted was to spook Aaron even more by using the L word.

"I like you a lot too and I'm just as scared as you are, believe me. It's a big step for both of us."

"I don't know if I can do this, not yet" Aaron said, shaking his head.

"Then we won't even try, not until we're both ready, ok?"

Aaron nodded.

"Want a hug?" Flynn said holding his arms out. Aaron walked in to the hug, nothing sexual about what they were doing anymore. Aaron held him tightly, not wanting to let him go, feeling safe with Flynn's muscular arms holding him. They stayed that way for a couple of minutes before with some more words of reassurance, Flynn left to drive home. They'd come so close to taking that next step, the closest they'd come so far but what Aaron had said to Jackson that morning had been true. He just wasn't ready to completely let him go yet.


	18. Chapter 18

**Sorry for the delay but finally managed to get this written. Hope you enjoy!**

**All the characters still belong to Emmerdale and ITV.**

It was the day before Christmas Eve, the last chance Aaron would have to see Flynn before he went away. He wasn't a big fan of Christmas at the best of times but this one was going to be horrible, he just knew it. Not only would it be his first without Jackson but he would be without Flynn too, the one person who might have made it all a bit more bearable. It still surprised him just how important Flynn had become to him, how much he meant to him now. He was getting closer and closer to taking that next step, finding it harder and harder to ignore the obvious, that he wanted to sleep with Flynn. He'd been thinking about it a lot, picturing it in his mind, imagining how it would feel to be touched by another man again. The only thing holding him back was that although he wanted to do it, he still wasn't sure that he would be able to. Part of him was saying well, there's only one way to find out, the other part was saying if there's any doubt, don't even try but which part should he listen to? At the moment, he didn't know. Still, they were going out tonight and he was determined to make the most of it.

He had wanted to start off in the village and then go into town but Flynn didn't see the point in coming all the way out to the village if they were only going to go into town later. He might as well meet Aaron in town, it was nearer for him. After a few minutes of well you choose then, no you choose, I don't mind, well neither do I really, Flynn had caved in and Aaron had got his own way. Flynn had decided that he really couldn't be bothered to argue over something so trivial. At the end of the day, did it really matter where they went for a drink as long as they spent some time together before he went away.

They'd arranged to meet in the pub as soon as Aaron finished work. Flynn arrived a little bit early and went to the garage to see if Aaron was still working. Aaron's face lit up when he saw Flynn walk around the corner. He turned to where Cain was working hoping that he hadn't seen but Cain was standing there just grinning at him. Aaron blushed and looked away again embarrassed that he'd been caught . He waited for Cain to say something but he didn't. Flynn smiled as he walked up to Aaron.

"Nearly done then?" he said.

"Yeah, shouldn't be too much longer, about ten minutes or so. Why don't you go and get us a couple of drinks and I'll be there as soon as I can."

"OK but aren't you going to go and get changed first?"

"No, I can do that later, won't take long to have a shower and get ready."

"Then why not do it now while I wait in the pub, it'll save a bit of time. Then when we're done, we can go straight into town."

"That makes a lot of sense does that, you should listen to him, he's not just a pretty face is he?" Cain chipped in.

"Er, do you mind, this is a private conversation thank you very much" Aaron said.

Cain smiled at the pair of them and put his head back under the bonnet of the car he was working on.

"Seriously, it won't take me long later, I promise, please" he pleaded.

"Go on then, I'll see you in a few minutes" Flynn said.

He felt comfortable enough going into the pub on his own now so waiting for Aaron wasn't a problem plus he couldn't say no when Aaron looked at him like that and said please. He was just irresistible. As he ordered their drinks, he noticed that Adam was sitting on his own so when their drinks arrived he went and sat down with him.

"Alright" he said.

"Yeah, good mate, good. Where is he then?"

"Just finishing at work. Should be here in a minute."

"So, last night before you go away then."

"Yeah, how did you know?" Flynn said laughing.

"How did I know? I got sick of seeing his miserable face so I told him one night if he didn't tell me what was wrong, he could do one and be miserable somewhere else."

"And he told you it was because I was going away."

"Eventually, yeah." Adam's face went serious. " When he lost Jackson, I didn't know what it would do to him. He struggled so much with his coming out and then to go through everything he went through with Jackson as well, I was really worried about him, we all were. Then, slowly but surely, the old Aaron started to come back. I didn't know at the time though that it was down to you."

Flynn shook his head. "I didn't do anything much."

"So you say. I'm just really pleased for him, you know. He deserves to be happy and you certainly make him that."

Flynn smiled at him. " Well, I do my best."

"Well, whatever you're doing it's definitely working. I've haven't seen him this happy in ages."

Aaron had stayed true to his word and came into the pub, looking around for Flynn. He smiled when he saw his boyfriend and his best mate sitting together chatting, getting on so well. It made things so much easier for him. He walked over to them and sat down.

"Well, this is cosy. Having a good chat are we?"

"We were but now you're here, things can only go downhill" Adam said.

They had a couple of pints with Adam, neither Flynn nor Aaron minding that they weren't on their own. They would have plenty of time just the two of them when they got into town. When they had finished their second pint, they both left to go to Smithy Cottage so Aaron could get changed. Paddy was there so Aaron left Flynn chatting to him and went to get ready. Flynn was glad to have Paddy to talk to, it meant he couldn't dwell on the images of Aaron in the shower that had started appearing in his head when he heard the water running.

About half an hour later, a cleaned up Aaron reappeared. Flynn's stomach somersaulted when he saw him. He still couldn't believe sometimes that he and Aaron were a couple, that this man with the beautiful blue eyes and the gorgeous smile was actually his boyfriend.

"Where's Paddy?" Aaron said.

"He said he had to nip out to the shop for something" Flynn said smiling at him.

"So it's just me and you then is it?" Aaron said grinning as he pulled Flynn close to kiss him. Flynn put his arms around Aaron, holding him tightly, enjoying the clean smell of him, the minty taste of him. He knew he'd said he'd wait for as long as it took for Aaron to be ready but every day it was proving more and more difficult and he was only human after all. He thought he'd done well to last this long. He'd even started dreaming about it now. How much longer he could keep a lid on everything, he really didn't know. Luckily for him, Aaron drew back and he could stop thinking about it for a while. Aaron looked at him and took a deep breath.

"What is it?" Flynn said.

"You know earlier, when I said about coming back here to change, well, it was just an excuse to get you to come back with me because I wanted to give you this" he said holding out a small, carefully wrapped present. He smiled shyly at Flynn who took the present off him.

"Can I open it now?" Flynn asked.

"Yeah, that's the general idea. I won't be able to give it to you on Christmas Day so I want you to have it now."

Flynn tore off the paper to find himself holding a rectangular box. He glanced up at Aaron who was biting his nails, watching anxiously. Flynn opened the box and inside was a silver chain with a small medal on it.

"It's a St Christopher. I thought with you always going away with college and you travelling over Christmas that it seemed appropriate."

"Oh Aaron, I don't know what to say. I wasn't expecting anything like this. You always said you were crap at buying presents."

"Yeah well, I usually am. You do like it don't you?"

Flynn smiled at him. "I love it, thank you." He took it out of the box with shaking hands. "Will you put it on for me, I'm all fingers and thumbs."

Aaron took the chain and stood behind Flynn to put it on. His hands were shaking nearly as much as Flynn's but he managed. Since that time three weeks ago when they'd nearly gone further than they had before, he'd been thinking about Flynn even more than usual. About how happy he was when he was with him, how he missed him when they weren't together, how good they were as a couple. He was glad Flynn couldn't see his face right now because, if he could, Aaron didn't think he could say what he wanted to, what he needed to. He put his arms around Flynn's waist resting his hands on his stomach. He kissed him a couple of times on the back of his neck before resting his chin on Flynn's shoulder. "I'm so glad that you came to talk to me that night in Bar West you know because if you hadn't, I don't know what kind of mess my life would be now. Since we've been together, it's just got better and better. I don't know what I'd do without you now. If I ever lost you it would destroy me because ...because I love you, Flynn." Aaron felt Flynn tense up before relaxing again. Flynn couldn't believe what he'd just heard. He turned around slowly to face Aaron, staring into those pools of blue that seemed to bore right through to the very soul of him. Aaron was watching him, waiting for a response, his breathing quicker than normal. Flynn didn't know if his voice would be there to say the words he wanted it to. He smiled at Aaron. "I love you too, I have done for a while now. You're so special to me, I'd be lost without you too. I don't ever want to stop feeling how you make me feel. I wanted to tell you but I just wasn't brave enough to say anything in case you didn't feel the same, in case you were't ready to hear it."

"Brave" Aaron said "You call this brave, look at me" and he held out his two hands which were shaking. "The rest of me is exactly the same. I've never been so scared but I couldn't let you go away not knowing how I really feel about you." Flynn held him close, stroking his back, feeling Aaron shaking beneath his hands and then gradually calming down. Flynn kissed him with all the feeling and intensity he could muster and Aaron kissed him back the same way. They were disturbed by the sound of the door opening and Paddy returning, a blast of icy air following him. They separated but stayed close.

"Blimey, it's freezing out there. You two still here, I thought you'd be gone by now."

"Yeah we're just leaving."

Paddy noticed the wrapping paper and grinned.

"So you gave it to him then? Honestly, you should have heard him, what if he doesn't like it, what if he's allergic to silver, what if this, what if that, it's all I've heard the last few days."

"Shut up Paddy" Aaron said embarrassed.

Flynn grinned at him. "Well he needn't have worried, he couldn't have picked anything better. I love it."

"I told him you would but he wouldn't listen."

"Come on, we better go" Aaron said taking Flynn's hand and heading towards the door.

"Have a good time." Paddy said.

He smiled to himself. Aaron was a constant source of surprises. He'd just watched him walk out of his house holding his boyfriend's hand like it was the most normal thing in the world. He would never have done that a while ago. Even with Jackson, Paddy very rarely saw any outward sign of affection between them. With Flynn, he just seemed so at ease, so comfortable with everything, how he should be. He couldn't have been more proud of Aaron than if he really was his own son.


	19. Chapter 19

Christmas Day arrived cold and bleak, the bleakness matching Aaron's mood. It had started yesterday when he'd gone to see Hazel to give her her Christmas present. It wasn't much, just a photo of Jackson that he'd taken when they'd been out somewhere which he'd put in a frame. It was one of his favourite pictures of him, he had a lovely smile on his face and looked amazing. He thought Hazel might like it too. She cried when she saw it and Aaron felt awful, he thought he'd done the wrong thing again but she said it was the nicest photo she'd ever seen of him and that it was exactly how she wanted to remember him. She'd gone away that night unable to face being in the village. Somehow, before she went, she'd got him to promise to go to church with Paddy on Christmas morning. She'd said it was the one day out of the year that her & Jackson used to go and, as she wouldn't be there, would he mind going instead. He'd said no course he didn't mind. He wasn't religious but it had seemed important to her so he'd agreed. He'd returned home and went straight up to his room. Paddy had left him alone. He'd had a bit of a cry, thinking about his and Jackson's last Christmas, about how happy they had been before their living nightmare had begun, how things could and maybe should have been different but there was nothing he could do about that now. He pulled himself together, the words from Jackson's letter coming back to him, words he knew off by heart, so many times had he read it. Jackson wouldn't want him to be miserable, wouldn't want him sitting here crying. He'd told him what he wanted him to do and crying wasn't part of the plan.

So, here he was, Christmas morning, not in the best of moods waiting for Paddy. He looked at his watch sure the time it showed wasn't right. He checked it against the clock and sure enough, it wasn't. He took it off and left it on the table. He'd tried everything he could think of over the last week or so but it still wouldn't work properly so there was no point wearing it.

"Paddy, I'll see you at the church" he shouted up the stairs before walking out. Now there was a sentence he hadn't been expecting to ever say on Christmas morning. He made his way to the cemetery to have a quick word with Jackson, wish him Happy Christmas and to let him know he was thinking about him and keeping an eye on his mum for him. The church service hadn't been too bad, all things considered. Paddy was sure he'd even heard Aaron singing, something Aaron was very quick to deny. Everyone headed over to the pub which always opened on Christmas Day for a couple of hours. Paddy went home to put the turkey in the oven and returned to find a drink waiting for him on the table where Aaron was sitting with Adam, Cain, Marlon and Chas. After a couple of drinks, Aaron's mood had lifted and he felt a bit better. Adam was telling some rubbish joke that he thought was so funny he couldn't even tell it properly because he was laughing so much, Cain and Chas were singing a rude version of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and everyone was having a loud but good time. Aaron went to check his watch which, of course, wasn't there. Flynn had said he would call and he wondered how much longer he would have to wait. That was about the third time he'd gone to check the time, why was it you never thought you looked at your watch very often until you stopped wearing it? Aaron's phone rang interrupting his thoughts and he grabbed it smiling when he saw who was calling him.

"Hi, Happy Christmas" he said.

"Happy Christmas to you too" Flynn replied. "Sounds like someone's enjoying themselves."

Aaron put one finger in his ear to try to block out some of the noise "Sorry, what did you say?" he said waving his hand at the others round the table to keep quiet.

"I said sounds like someone's enjoying themselves. Where are you?"

"In the pub and yeah, you could say that. That's what drinking on an empty stomach does to them. So, how's your Christmas going?"

"Is that Flynn?" Chas suddenly screeched.

Aaron nodded his head. Suddenly, there was a whole chorus of Happy Christmas Flynn yelled in Aaron's direction. Flynn laughed. "Tell them I said the same to them."

"He said same to you." Aaron stood up and went to move. "Hang on a minute mate will you, I'm really struggling to hear you. I'm just going to head outside."

Aaron walked out of the pub and stood with his back to the road and the wind, stamping his feet to keep warm. "Sorry about that" he said.

"No problem, can you hear me now?"

"Yeah, much better."

"Good. You look freezing by the way."

"You what?" Aaron said thinking he'd misheard.

"I said you look freezing. Fit, and your bum looks great in those jeans but freezing."

"How, what….how would you know what I'm wearing?"

"Cos I'm right behind you."

Aaron spun around to see Flynn standing about five feet away from him. Flynn smiled at him, Aaron just stood with his mouth open. Still with his phone to his ear, he said "What are you doing here?"

"I don't think we need these anymore do you?" Flynn said putting his phone away. Aaron put his phone back in his pocket before walking over to Flynn, throwing his arms around him.

"What are you doing here? I don't understand."

"Last minute change of plans so I thought I'd surprise you, if that's ok with you."

Aaron grinned at him. "Course it's ok with me."

He noticed the wind was making Flynn's eyes water and a tear was slowly running down his cheek. He wiped it away with his thumb before gently moving his hand along Flynn's jaw. He kept his hand resting there as he kissed him. Neither wanted to break the kiss but Aaron was shivering from head to toe now so they had to.

"Come on, you need to get back inside." Flynn said. They just reached the doors to go back into the bar when Aaron turned around to face him.

"So, what time do you have to get back?"

"That's nice seeing as I've only just got here. Trying to get rid of me already are you?"

"No, no course not. I just wondered what time you had to be back home."

"I don't. I'm yours for as long as you want me."

"You might just regret saying that one day."

"I don't think so." Flynn said shaking his head.

Aaron kissed him quickly and they went back into the warmth.

They walked up to the bar where Paddy was standing waiting to order. He looked and looked again. "Flynn? Haven't we just shouted down his phone to you? I thought you were away."

"Yeah, I was going to be but there was a change of plans."

"Oh I see. So what are you doing for your dinner? You're welcome to come to ours, one more won't make a difference and you'd be doing me a favour because if you're there, I'll have some intelligent conversation for a change." Aaron punched him on the arm.

"If you're sure you don't mind, that'd be great."

"Right, that's sorted then. So, what are you two drinking?"

"Lager, please."

"Ok, I'll bring them over. Aaron can help me can't you?"

Aaron pulled a face. "Yeah if you want."

"Flynn mate, over here" Adam yelled. Flynn smiled and went to sit down. Paddy looked at Aaron. "Well, that's put a smile back on your face hasn't it?"

"Paddy" Aaron said looking a little bit uncomfortable.

"Look, I don't want to assume anything here but, just so you know and to save you the embarrassment of asking, if you want him to stay over, it's not a problem."

Aaron looked at him. "You're jumping the gun a bit aren't you? I hadn't even thought about that."

"Oh, yeah, right. Pull the other one Aaron. You hadn't thought about that. I know the signs now, you know. I can tell"

"Signs, what signs? What can you tell?"

Paddy laughed. "Calm down, I'm only joking. It's just I know how much you like him so, if you want to ask him, it's fine."

"Well, I don't know yet but thank you." Aaron said. He did know, course he would ask him, Paddy knew he would too but neither of them said any more about it.

"That's ok, I'll be at Marlon's tonight anyway."

"Will you, I didn't know that."

"Neither does Marlon yet. I'll tell him when I bring the drinks over." He smiled at Aaron.

Aaron smiled back. "Thanks Paddy. Oh, but try not to make it too obvious."

"Course, what do you take me for."

Paddy and Aaron brought the drinks over to the table and they sat down. Aaron turned to Flynn.

"I hope you know what you've let yourself in for."

"What do you mean?"

"Christmas Day with Paddy. Dinner first, then, depending which one is on, we have to watch either the Wizard of Oz or the Sound of Music, it's tradition, well, Paddy's tradition anyway."

Flynn laughed. "Well, if it's tradition, there's not much we can do is there? Besides, a bit of doe, a deer, a female deer never hurt anyone did it?"

"Are you kidding? And if you even think about singing along, you're in big trouble."

"Spoilsport."

Aaron was serious again for a minute. Under the table, he put his hand on Flynn's leg.

"I'm really glad you're here."

"Yeah, me too."

Aaron had a feeling he was being watched and looked up to see Marlon and Paddy grinning at him, Marlon holding his thumb up. Oh god, Paddy's asked him already Aaron thought. So much for not making it obvious. Luckily enough, no one else seemed to have noticed the two of them grinning inanely at him. Now, he would have to say something in case one of those two did.

"Flynn, can I have a word a minute, somewhere a bit quieter."

"Course" They both stood up.

"And where are you two sneaking off to, he's only just got here, let him have his drink first at least" Cain said smirking.

"Ha, hysterical" Aaron said.

They walked out into the little area just outside the toilets. Flynn looked at Aaron wondering what he was going to say.

"Er, I was wondering, whether you want to, you know, maybe stay at mine tonight. That way you can have a drink without worrying about having to drive back. I mean, it's not really Christmas if you can't drink is it?" Aaron looked at Flynn waiting for his response.

Flynn stared into Aaron's eyes.

"And making sure I don't drink and drive, is that the only reason you want me to stay?"

Aaron's heart felt like it was about to jump out of his chest. This was it, decision time. He looked into Flynn's eyes, looked at the gentle face looking back at him.

Aaron shook his head. "No, I just don't want you to go home tonight."

Flynn smiled. "Are you sure about this?"

"Yeah, I am, please, I want you to stay."

"And what about Paddy, is he ok with this?"

"Yeah, he'll be at Marlon's for the night."

Flynn nodded. "Ok, I'd love to stay. I don't really want to go home tonight either but I'll only stay on one condition."

"What's that?" Aaron said concern etched on his face.

"That we don't put any pressure on ourselves. What happens happens, what doesn't doesn't ok?"

Aaron smiled and nodded. "Come on, we better get back."

As they walked back in, Paddy and Marlon looked at them still grinning.

"Why do I get the feeling that I'm not the first person to know about tonight?" Flynn said.

"No, it's not like that, honest, I haven't been saying anything…..."

"Aaron, it's fine, don't worry."

They sat back down and finished their drinks before heading home for their dinner. Paddy had already gone in to the cottage and Aaron and Flynn weren't far behind him.

"Hang on a sec, I've got something for you" Flynn said unlocking his car.

"Oh yeah" Aaron replied.

Flynn grinned. "Easy tiger. Here, Happy Christmas."

He handed Aaron a present. Aaron took it and just stared at it. "Well open it then, it's freezing out here."

Aaron tore off the wrapping paper to find a clear box containing a watch.

"I noticed you were having trouble with yours and you're not wearing one now so …."

Aaron smiled at him. "This is great. I can't believe you noticed that my one wasn't working properly. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Now can we please go in, because I can't feel my fingers anymore."

"Yeah, course we can, come on."

They went in to the cottage, both wondering if this Christmas day could possibly get any better.


	20. Chapter 20

Aaron and Flynn walked into the cottage shutting the door behind them, the heat hitting them as they entered the kitchen. They took their jackets off and Aaron hung them both up. He threw the wrapping paper he was still holding in the bin before taking his new watch out of the box and putting it on. He smiled at Flynn.

"Thanks again for this, it's mint."

"Glad you like it."

"So, how are the fingers, got the feeling back in them yet?"

"Yeah, just about."

"Shame, I was going to offer to warm them up for you."

"Well, you never know, maybe they'll need warming up again later, or something else might."

"Yeah but I might have changed my mind by then."

"I'll take my chances."

They smiled at each other as Paddy came downstairs. "Nice watch, who's a lucky boy then?" he said.

The front door opened again and in came Marlon & Chas. That was it, everyone was here now.

"Right, we'll leave you lot to it then. I'm sure you don't want us under your feet, do you? No, thought not." Aaron said.

He and Flynn went into the other room and switched the TV on. They were sitting next to each other on the sofa when Chas came in with two can's of lager.

"Thought you two might like a drink, you know, especially you Flynn now you don't have to drive anywhere else today." She grinned at them. Flynn smiled and took the can that was offered to him, Aaron grabbed his before shouting "Thanks, Paddy or Marlon, whichever one of you it was." He could hear giggling coming from the kitchen.

"Right, I'll go and set the table or something." Chas said.

When she'd left the room, Aaron put his head on Flynn's shoulder. "I can't believe they told her. I'll never hear the end of it now."

"It doesn't really matter, does it? She would have found out sooner or later. Besides, the car's going to be parked outside all night anyway so you don't need to be a genius to figure it out."

Aaron thought about what Flynn had just said, he'd forgotten about the car. Anyone who looked up towards the house would see it, they'd all know. He waited for the feeling of panic to wash over him like it used to do when people knew about his private life but it didn't happen.

"No, do you know what, it doesn't matter, it doesn't matter who knows." He turned slightly so his back was resting against Flynn, Flynn's hand resting on Aaron's leg.

Chas was peering through the doorway, looking at the two of them, a big smile on her face.

"Look at this Paddy" she said "How many times have you seen him this relaxed, this comfortable with everything, this happy."

Paddy stood next to her. "Not often enough. It's like what Jackson started, Flynn's finished off, if you know what I mean."

"Yeah, I do. He picked two good un's didn't he? He's got better taste in men than me, that's for sure."

"Er, thanks for that."

"Oh Paddy, I wasn't talking about you, you know that."

"Yeah, I do. It's good to see isn't it?"

"Yeah, it is. I'm so proud of him."

"We all are."

"When you two have quite finished, I wouldn't mind a hand if it's not too much trouble." Marlon said. They moved away to help sort the dinner out.

Once dinner was over, the rest of the day passed by quite quickly but not quickly enough for Flynn and Aaron. They just wanted to be on their own now. Luckily, they hadn't had to sit through either The Wizard of Oz or The Sound of Music because they weren't on. They had to sit through ET instead. As ET was dying, Paddy left the room to go and get some drinks, Marlon suddenly needed the toilet and Chas wanted to give Paddy a hand. Flynn looked at Aaron who was rubbing his eyes.

"Anywhere you need to be suddenly?" he asked, looking at Aaron's slightly watery eyes.

"No" he said "I must have dropped off. My eyes always itch when I first wake up."

"Yeah, course they do" Flynn said grinning.

Aaron elbowed him gently in the ribs. Although the film had been on, his thoughts had been elsewhere. He was thinking about later. He was glad Flynn was staying, he'd meant it when he told him he didn't want him to go home. The thought of going to bed with him was exciting but it was terrifying too. That final step could be taken tonight. In a few hours time, Flynn could see the Aaron that only Jackson knew and, while Aaron knew it was what he wanted, he still didn't know if it would happen, if he could allow it to happen.

Sitting next to him, Flynn had been having similar thoughts. Would tonight be the night or would he have to settle for just sleeping next to Aaron? If that was all that happened, that they just slept in the same bed together, that was alright, it was another step in the right direction. He'd meant what he said too, if it didn't happen, it didn't happen, there would be other nights but he really wanted it to be tonight. He had the same feeling of excitement and terror that Aaron had. He tried to relax. Thinking about it wasn't going to help. He would just have to see what happened.

A couple of hours later, they finally had the place to themselves. Aaron came in from the kitchen with a couple of beers, put them on the table and sat down next to Flynn. He leant his back against Flynn's chest, Flynn put his arm around him resting his hand on Aaron's stomach.

"I thought they'd never go, I thought they were here for the night, that they'd changed their mind" Aaron said.

"I don't think they'd dare, not after the very subtle way you kept looking at your watch every few seconds and glaring at them."

"I didn't glare, well, not that often."

They sat in silence, enjoying the peace & quiet and the pleasure they both got just from being together. Aaron had the remote control and started flicking through the channels looking for something to watch. After about ten minutes of this, Flynn had had enough. He grabbed the remote control from Aaron.

"Oi, give that back you."

"No, changing the channels like that is doing my head in. Why can't you just pick a channel and leave it?"

Aaron pulled a face and made a grab for the remote but Flynn was quicker. He stretched his arm out so the remote was just out of Aaron's reach, his t-shirt riding up slightly in the process. As Aaron turned himself around ready to make another lunge for it, he was faced with the sight of Flynn's flat stomach and the top of his boxers showing above the waistband of his jeans. He didn't care about the remote control anymore, funnily enough he'd lost interest in it. Flynn saw Aaron looking at him, saw the expression on his face as he moved his eyes upwards to meet his. They moved at the same time to kiss each other, the remote control falling to the floor as Flynn dropped it to put his arms around Aaron. He moved his hands slowly up and down Aaron's back before putting his hands under Aaron's jumper and carrying on. For the first time since they'd been together, he touched Aaron's bare skin, feeling Aaron shiver under his touch. He felt his own t-shirt being pushed up as Aaron's hands wandered over his bare skin for the first time too. He felt like every nerve in his body was on fire. As their kiss deepened and became more intense, Aaron pushed himself against Flynn, both of them able to feel how excited the other one was. After a few minutes, Aaron pulled back and looked at Flynn, both of them a little breathless.

"How would you feel about going upstairs?" he asked.

Flynn smiled at him. "I think that's a good idea."

They got up off the sofa and walked out of the sitting room and kitchen, Aaron turning the lights off as they went.

They walked up the stairs, Flynn walking behind Aaron. Aaron opened the door to his bedroom and switched on the light. He stood back to let Flynn go in first . Both their hearts were beating faster than normal as they anticipated what was very likely to happen. Aaron turned his back to close the door taking a few deep breaths before walking over to the window to close the curtains. He wanted this to happen so much but still, even now, he couldn't say for certain that it would. He turned to see Flynn sitting on his bed watching him.

"Making yourself comfortable are you?" he said.

Flynn smiled. "I er had no choice, it was either sit down or fall down. I didn't know how much longer my legs would support me."

Aaron smiled at him, twisting his hands together as he tended to do when he was nervous.

"Shall I put some music on?"

"If you want to." Flynn didn't care one way or the other but if playing some music helped to break the tension that was in the air, than it might not be a bad thing. Aaron walked over and pressed play. Suddenly, a thumping drum and bass blasted out of the speakers at about a couple of hundred decibels, or so it seemed to Flynn. Aaron didn't know whether to switch it off, turn the volume down or what to do so ended up doing neither, randomly pressing buttons until the noise stopped as suddenly as it had started and silence once again descended on the room.

"Blimey, it's a good job you've got no neighbours" Flynn said laughing.

"Sorry about that. It's what I usually play when I'm getting ready to go out."

"It's fine. At least it wasn't some love song that got blasted out at that volume. Then I'd be worried."

"Like that would happen. I don't do romantic & soppy, remember?"

Flynn raised his eyebrows. He reached for the St Christopher that Aaron had given to him a few days before.

"Really? I disagree."

Aaron smiled at him. "Ok, sometimes I do romantic and soppy but never with music."

They were both starting to relax a little bit, their mood a bit lighter as the tension started lifting.

"Come here for a minute" Flynn said.

Aaron crossed the room and sat on the bed next to Flynn, looking at him, wondering what he was going to do next.

"Look, I don't do one night stands and I don't sleep around. I've only ever slept with one person too so, whatever you're thinking, whatever you're feeling, I'm going through the same thing." He took Aaron's hand in his own. "I love you and whatever happens tonight, or doesn't as the case may be, when I wake up tomorrow, I'll still feel exactly the same."

Aaron hadn't taken his eyes off Flynn all the time he'd been speaking. He'd forgotten what a big deal this was for him too, to trust someone again after being cheated on, to trust him again after what he'd done to him before yet, here he was trying to put him at ease, put his mind at rest. Aaron knew right then that he had nothing to worry about, that his head had finally caught up with his body and they both now wanted the same thing.

"How come you always know the right things to say?" Aaron said.

Flynn looked embarrassed. "I don't know, must be a gift I suppose."

They looked at each other, seeing their own feelings reflected in the other one's eyes. As always with them, their kissing started softly and tenderly, gradually building in intensity and feeling causing them to fall backwards onto the bed. Jumpers and T-shirts were pushed up and then removed as their hands touched each other, stroking, caressing and exploring. Nothing was rushed or hurried, everything happening at a pace they were both happy with. As they both relaxed and felt more comfortable together, their mouths separated and they placed their kisses elsewhere, the silence interrupted only by the sound of deeper breathing and the occasional gasp or moan of pleasure.

Aaron rolled on top of Flynn, kissing him on the mouth again, their tongues fighting their own battle with each other, Aaron feeling instantly that Flynn was as turned on as he was. They stopped briefly, looking at each other but no words were needed. They were both at the point of no return, neither wanting to stop now. The remainder of their clothes were removed and thrown on the floor as they both saw and touched what they'd only dreamt about or imagined. At long last, naked and wrapped up in each other's arms, they finally surrendered to the feelings that had been building between them for the last few months, taking each other to that special place where only two people who genuinely love each other can go.

A couple of hours later, cuddled up together exhausted and waiting for sleep, Aaron and Flynn both knew that there was nowhere they would rather be than where they were now, each held in the arms of the man they loved.


	21. Chapter 21

**Just a short one to tidy things up. These characters still belong to Emmerdale.**

Flynn woke up and looked around the unfamiliar bedroom. It was so quiet in the village, so peaceful, no traffic noise like there was at home. There was hardly a sound from outside and inside, there was only the sound of Aaron sleeping on his back next to him. It may have taken a while to get there, a long while in fact but it had been so worth the wait. It had been everything he'd hoped it would be and more. He smiled to himself as images of him and Aaron from the night before replayed themselves in his mind. He just hoped Aaron would wake up feeling the same way he did. He settled himself back down again, closing his eyes waiting to see if sleep would come back to him. He turned on his side carefully placing his arm across Aaron's stomach, wanting to be close to him but not to disturb him. He was warm, happy, comfortable and in bed naked with Aaron, it didn't get any better than this.

When Aaron woke up, the first thing he felt was the weight of Flynn's arm draped across him. He smiled, his thoughts instantly going back to the previous night. He hadn't felt that alive in a long time. Everything had felt so right, so good between them. It had been amazing and he was still waiting to find something Flynn wasn't good at. This was certainly a Christmas he would never forget. He turned his head towards where Flynn was lying, not wanting to turn his body in case the movement disturbed Flynn but he needn't have worried, he was already awake. They smiled, any worries Flynn had about Aaron not feeling the same way he did were gone as soon as he saw the way Aaron looked at him.

"Hey" Aaron said "been awake long?"

"A while" Flynn said looking into Aaron's eyes which promptly closed again.

"You'll have to give me a minute to come round properly, I'm not great in the mornings."

"That's ok, I'm not going anywhere."

Aaron's eyes opened again and he turned his body to face Flynn.

"So, did you sleep ok?"

"Like a baby, something must have worn me out." Flynn said with raised eyebrows.

"Lightweight."

"Oh I am am I. So how come you were asleep before I was?"

"Don't think I was."

Flynn was watching Aaron, looking at his eyes. He shook his head and smiled.

"I knew it, you Mr Livesy are a liar" he said prodding him on the chest.

"You what?"

"You, you're a liar. You've been awake a couple of minutes now at least and you haven't rubbed your eyes once. Yesterday, you said they watered and were itchy every time you woke up."

"Well, they usually are" Aaron said pulling a face.

"No they're not. Just admit it, you cried at ET. It's nothing to be ashamed of. I think it's really cute."

"Shut up, you" Aaron said blushing, playfully punching Flynn on the arm.

Flynn laughed. "Ow, that hurt."

"Aw, did it, I'm sorry, shall I kiss it better?"

He placed a kiss on Flynn's arm where he'd punched him. "There, all better. Anywhere else that needs kissing better while I'm at it?" The way Flynn was looking at him told him the answer was yes. He pulled Flynn close and kissed him slowly. Before long, it was like an action replay of the night before.

Lying together afterwards, they thought about getting up but decided they were both too comfortable so they stayed where they were, just talking and relaxing, listening to some music. Eventually, Aaron decided he was too hungry to stay in bed any longer so he went downstairs to get them something to eat. He came back upstairs with bacon sandwiches and tea balanced on a tray.

"I could really get used to this" Flynn said.

"Yeah, well, you just remember this when it's your turn to get me breakfast in bed. I made you tea, hope that's alright."

Flynn smiled. "Tea's great, I like coffee but first thing in the morning, it has to be tea. Paddy back yet?"

"Dunno, he wasn't downstairs."

Aaron put the tray on the bed and handed Flynn one of the mugs. They ate their late breakfast talking about what they would do for the rest of the day. Boxing Day was usually a nothing day, all the excitement of Christmas gone and not a lot happening. They decided that they would hang around there and go for a drink in the pub later that evening. Thank goodness for Sky, at least there would be a football match for them to watch this afternoon. They got dressed and piled everything back on the tray.

As they came downstairs laughing and joking, they went into the kitchen to find Paddy sitting at the table with his back to them holding his head in his hands, eyes closed. Aaron motioned for Flynn to be quiet, went up behind him and shouted "Morning Paddy" laughing out loud as Paddy nearly fell off the chair.

"Is it? I am never, ever, drinking alcohol ever, ever, ever again. The things I do for you."

"Oh no, you're not blaming this one on me. You only had to stay out of the way last night, I didn't ask you to go and get hammered now did I?" he said putting a glass of water in front of Paddy.

"Yeah, well, it was Christmas wasn't it. Would have been rude not to." He looked at the water and pushed it away.

Aaron looked at Flynn and the pair of them laughed. "Can't even face water, eh, must be bad."

"You have no idea."

"Shame we ate all the bacon really or we could have done you a nice fry up. Some nice runny eggs, a couple of sausages…."

Paddy pulled a face and turned a strange colour.

"I think I'm just going to go to bed and hide under the duvet until I feel human again."

He stood up and moved unsteadily towards the stairs.

"That was mean, funny but mean" Flynn said.

Aaron grinned at him. "Yeah, I know."

With Paddy in bed, they had even more time to themselves than they were expecting. They watched the football, watched a DVD together before Flynn left to go home. He wanted a shower and to get changed before coming back later to go to the pub. They had both wondered yesterday afternoon if their Christmas Day could have possibly got any better. They both knew now that the answer was a definite yes, it could have and it did.


	22. Chapter 22

Flynn was standing in front of the mirror in his room finishing off getting ready to go out. He sorted his hair out and then started to do the buttons up on his shirt. His brother stood in the doorway watching him.

"Finally made your way home then did you, dirty stop out. And how is Aaron?"

Flynn just smiled.

"I take it everything went well yesterday" he said, walking over to sit on the bed.

"Yes, everything went well yesterday" Flynn replied.

"Good. Told you everything would work out alright in the end didn't I?"

"Ok smart arse."

Harrison watched his brother fiddling around with his shirt. First, there was a couple of buttons opened, then there was only one. Then, he rolled the sleeves up a bit, then he pulled them down. One minute the collar was up, then it was down. He knew the signs, something was bothering him.

"Ok, out with it."

"You what?"

"What's on your mind? Something is, you only ever mess around with your clothes like that when something's bothering you."

Flynn turned around and leant back against the wall. He looked at his brother.

"There's nothing bothering me as such, it's just, I still can't believe that Aaron and me are a couple. When we're out, I see the way he gets looked at by blokes and girls come to think of it but he doesn't even notice. He has no idea how attractive he is, he could have anyone he wants and….

"If you're going to say and you can't believe he wants you, then I'm going to slap you."

Flynn smiled because that had been exactly what he was going to say even though they'd now taken that final step in their relationship.

" I suppose I just can't believe how lucky I am."

Harrison knew what was going on. When Matt cheated on him, Flynn had lost all his confidence and he had had to pick up the pieces. Flynn had thought it was his fault, that he wasn't good enough, that's why it had happened. Harrison had had to get his brother to believe in himself again, get him to believe that he was worth more than how he had been treated. On the whole, Flynn was fine, he was cocky, cheeky, good humoured but every once in a while, those self doubts about not being good enough crept up to the surface again just like they were doing now.

"Yeah well, Aaron's pretty lucky too, don't you forget that. It was you who helped him, got him through everything and now you've got your reward." He picked up a pillow and threw it at Flynn. "So, stop worrying and go have fun with your boyfriend."

Flynn knocked on the door of Smithy Cottage and waited for it to be opened. Paddy let him in and told him that Aaron was in the other room. Aaron heard the door close and smiled. He was back. He looked up as Flynn came into the room and what he saw made his stomach do somersaults. Flynn looked gorgeous. He was only wearing jeans and a shirt but boy he wore them well. Flynn saw the way Aaron was looking at him. He didn't remember Aaron looking at him like that before, ever. They smiled at each other.

"Well, you took your time. How long does it take to get a shower and change your clothes?" Aaron said.

"Sorry I didn't realise I was being timed did I?" Flynn replied, walking over to sit next to Aaron.

Aaron pulled a face.

"So, did you miss me?" Flynn asked.

"No, as if."

"Aww you did didn't you? "

"Behave yourself."

"Was I gone too long for you?"

"If you don't stop, you'll get another punch."

"After what happened last time you punched me, believe me, that's no incentive to get me to stop."

Aaron blushed and looked at Flynn who was grinning at him. He smiled back before kissing him.

"You look great by the way" Aaron said quietly.

"What, this old thing."

Aaron laughed and got up off the sofa. "Right, two minutes and then we can go."

Flynn nodded his head and went into the kitchen to wait. Paddy was at the sink smiling to himself. He turned when he heard Flynn coming into the room.

"Do you know what, that brought back memories."

"What did?"

"Listening to you two going on like that. Him and Jackson used to do it all the time, always teasing each other, taking the mickey out of each other but you could tell it was all based on affection."

"Oh right" Flynn said wondering why Paddy was telling him this.

Aaron ran down the stairs. "Right you, come on, you're buying the first round for making me wait so long. See you later Paddy."

"Yeah, see you later."

They had just got to the pub when Cain walked up the road.

"Evening" he said. He looked at Flynn. "You don't mind if I borrow him for a couple of minutes do you only I need to have a word."

"No, be my guest. I'll get em in."

Flynn walked in to the pub and up to the bar. He ordered their drinks and waited. He could hear Adam's voice coming from somewhere behind him so turned round to see if he could see him. Adam was already on his way over.

"Here he is, Jackson mark two. He's even got you dressing like him now has he?"

Flynn looked down at his checked shirt and jeans.

"Sorry, what?"

"Jackson, he used to wear shirts like that all the time. So, where is your other half then?"

"Outside talking to Cain, he shouldn't be long." He picked up their drinks and went to sit down. Suddenly, he began to feel a bit uncomfortable. He'd thought that Aaron had looked at him in that way when he came in because he was pleased to see him, because he liked what he saw. Now, it looked like he only looked at him like that because he was wearing something that reminded him of Jackson. Then, there was what Paddy had said, that their teasing was just like how Aaron used to go on with Jackson. He shook his head. No, this was ridiculous, he had to stop thinking like this. It was just coincidence. Aaron was with him because he loved him, end of.

Aaron came in and looked around to see where Flynn was sitting, a big smile appearing on his face when he saw him.

"All sorted?" Flynn asked.

"Yeah, he needs me to work over the next few days. Got a rush job in, but he'll pay me a nice little bonus cos I'm not supposed to be working. You don't mind do you only the money will come in dead handy."

"No, course I don't mind."

"Great, now where's that drink you've got me."

Flynn tried to forget what he had heard but the words kept going round & round in his head. The rational part of his brain told him he had nothing to worry about, he only had to think about how Aaron was when they were together to know how Aaron felt about him. The other part of his brain, however, was working overtime, filling him with these nagging little doubts. At the moment, the rational part of his brain was losing the battle. He managed to do a pretty good impression of being his normal self, chatting away and joking with Aaron and Adam, neither of them thought that anything was wrong. Adam got up to get a round of drinks and Aaron turned his full attention to Flynn.

"So, are you staying again tonight?" Aaron said, his blue eyes sparkling, the smile that Flynn loved to see breaking out on his face. Flynn looked at him.

"I don't know, do you want me to?"

"Like you have to ask. Course I do but do you want to?"

What Flynn wanted was for these stupid thoughts to go away, that's what he wanted. He pushed them out of his head again and concentrated on Aaron looking at him, waiting for his answer.

He smiled at him. "You know what my answer is."

"Not good enough. I want to hear you say it."

Flynn turned slightly so he was facing Aaron.

"Oh, you do, do you? Ok, yes, I would love to stay with you again tonight. Clear enough for you?"

"Crystal" Aaron said, kissing him briefly.

"Put him down, please" Adam said, putting their drinks on the table. They sat for a few more minutes chatting before Flynn said he needed to go to the loo. Aaron turned his head and watched him as he walked away, smiling to himself.

"What are you like?" Adam said laughing at his mate. He got no answer.

"Hello, Aaron, hello."

"What, sorry, did you say something?"

Adam laughed. "I said, what are you like, watching Flynn like that."

"Well, I'm allowed to look at him aren't I?"

"Yeah, course you are. It's just not like you to be so obvious. You were never like that before."

"Well, things are different now, I'm different."

"Doesn't Flynn remind you of Jackson?"Adam said. Aaron looked at him.

Flynn was on his way back to the table. He'd just pushed opened the door when he heard the word Jackson and stopped in his tracks. He listened to hear what was being said next.

"Come on mate, I know you're not the quickest at picking up on things but even you must have noticed how alike they can be, especially tonight with him wearing that shirt."

"Yeah, course I have. I'm not totally stupid you know."

"Aah, I knew there was a reason you liked him so much. So, is that why you and him are together then?"

"Yeah, course it is" Aaron said grinning.

Now he'd heard it straight from the horses mouth. Aaron was with him because he reminded him of Jackson. All the self doubts he'd been trying to suppress suddenly flooded through him. He knew it had been too good to be true. There was no way someone like Aaron would have been with him just because he loved him. He suddenly had an even more horrible thought. What about when they'd slept together? Had that only happened because Aaron couldn't have who he really wanted so he'd made do with him? He felt sick. He closed the door again and went to sit outside suddenly needing some fresh air.

"You are such an idiot at times, Adam. Course I'm not with Flynn because he reminds me of Jackson. Yeah, they're similar I suppose, sometimes, but they're different too. I'm with Flynn because I love him, simple as that. Flynn's, well, he's special. Someone like him doesn't come along very often. Do you know, we haven't had one argument in all the time we've been seeing each other."

"You're kidding me. You could start an argument in an empty room."

"That's what I mean. He's special."

"Blimey, I'll have to get a new suit and write a speech soon then, will I?"

Aaron laughed. "Don't be daft. I'm just saying..

"Yeah, I know mate, I know."

Outside, on one of the benches, Flynn was wiping the tears away as the cold night air made him shiver. What a difference a day makes. This time last night, he and Aaron were in bed together, getting to know each other physically. Now, he was out here on his own with his world crumbling around him, wondering how he could ever have been stupid enough to believe that Aaron was with him because he wanted him. He didn't want to be a Jackson mark two, he just wanted to be himself and for him, Flynn to be good enough for Aaron which quite obviously he wasn't. He was just a substitute for Jackson.

"Flynn, what you doing out here, it's freezing. You ok?"

Flynn looked up to see Hazel standing next to him. He hadn't seen or heard her approach. She looked at him and sat down.

"Alright, what's he done?"

"What's who done?"

"Aaron. I've seen that expression before. That's exactly how my Jackson used to look when something had happened."

Great, now I can't even look miserable without looking like Jackson, Flynn thought.

"No, he hasn't done anything. I just needed some air, feeling a bit sick, you know."

Hazel nodded. "Right, well I'll leave you to it then but you're just as bad a liar as he was too."

She went into the pub and bumped straight into Aaron.

"Don't suppose you've seen Flynn have you? He went to the loo ages ago and never came back."

"Yeah, he's outside."

"Oh, great, thanks Hazel."

He bounded outside finding Flynn sitting at one of the tables. He walked up and put his arms around him resting his chin on Flynn's shoulder

"Hey, what you doing out here?"

"I wasn't feeling great, thought the fresh air might help."

"Why, what's the matter?" Aaron asked, concern etched on his face.

"Just feeling a bit sick. Look, I think I'd better just get home."

"Well, don't drive home if you're feeling sick. You can still stay at mine."

"No, better not. You know how it is, you just want your own bed when you don't feel well."

"Well hold on a minute. I'll just say bye to Adam and I'll come with you."

Flynn stood up and turned to face Aaron. "No, there's no need, really."

"But I want to."

"Honestly, I'll be fine. It's probably just a twenty four hour thing. You stay, enjoy yourself. I'll call you tomorrow."

"Ok, well text me and let me know you got home safe."

"Alright, I will."

Aaron pulled him into a hug and held Flynn tightly, Flynn holding him just as tightly back. Aaron looked into Flynn's eyes. Something was wrong and it had nothing to do with Flynn feeling ill. Aaron had finally found something Flynn wasn't good at - lying. He went back into the pub to tell Adam he was calling it a night. Flynn texted him to say he was at home. He sent a text back but got no reply. He was confused and worried. Everything had been fine right up until a couple of hours ago. What could have possibly happened in that time to have sent Flynn running home pretending he was ill? He eventually fell asleep alone in his bed, the bed where he and Flynn should have been sleeping together, eventually.

When he woke up the next morning, the first thing he did was ring Flynn. His mobile was switched off. Aaron shook his head. Whatever was going on, he needed to know. He sent Cain a text saying he'd be late coming in. He wouldn't be happy but this was more important. He found himself a while later standing on Flynn's doorstep, too scared to knock on the door. He sighed, he knew he had to do this so he knocked. Flynn opened the door. Aaron was shocked at his appearance. He looked terrible. He looked like he hadn't slept, his eyes were red and his hair was all over the place. What Aaron was really struck by was how sad he looked. Where had the smiling, happy, cheeky Flynn he'd been with the day before gone?

"You better come in" he said.

"You look terrible, what's wrong, are you still feeling ill and why'd you switch your phone off?"

Flynn just walked ahead of him into the sitting room and sat down on the sofa. Aaron sat down next to him.

"Flynn, what's wrong? I'm imagining all sorts here and I, er, I know you weren't really feeling ill last night. Please, just tell me."

Flynn looked at him, the pain of whatever he was going through etched all across his face. "Why are you with me?"

Aaron looked confused. "What?"

"Why are you with me?"

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Just answer me. Why are you with me?"

"Where's this come from?"

Flynn raised his voice.

"Will you please stop answering whatever I say with a question. It's a simple enough question Aaron, even for you, why are you with me?"

Aaron was completely thrown. He'd never heard Flynn speak in this tone of voice before. He reached out with a shaking hand and took Flynn's hand in his.

"I could sit here and list a million reasons why I'm with you but, if you don't tell me what the real problem is, how can I help you?"

Flynn looked at him with tears in his eyes. He took a deep breath.

"Ok, I'll tell you. Are you only with me because I remind you of Jackson?"

Aaron shook his head in disbelief. "What, no, absolutely not. What on earth gave you that idea?"

"It was yesterday. Paddy told me listening to us mucking about was like listening to you and him all over again, Adam called me Jackson mark two, said I even dressed like him, even Hazel…

"Hazel, what's she got to do with this?"

"She talked to me outside the pub, said she recognised the look on my face, it was the same as his when you and him had problems. She said I was as bad a liar as he was too. My mind just went into overdrive. I just had to get away." He couldn't tell him that he'd overheard him talking to Adam, laughing about him, that was just too painful. "But that's not all of it." He hung his head.

"There's more?"

Flynn nodded. "I just can't get the thought out of my head that when we slept together, you were thinking of him, wishing it was him."

Aaron was speechless. If Flynn wasn't so upset by all this, it would almost be funny. In a way, he was relieved, at least he hadn't done anything wrong, done something to upset him. On the other hand, how on earth could he sort this out? He couldn't open his head up and get Flynn to look inside and see it was only him he thought about. He couldn't believe a couple of chance remarks had caused him this much agony. Then he remembered. This was Flynn's self confidence thing again, a throw back to what Matt had done to him. It's a good job he'd left the area cos if he ever got his hands on him…. He took a deep breath. He also knew what it was like to get an idea in your head and not be able to get rid of it, no matter how stupid it seemed to other people. He'd been there, done that, got the t-shirt on that one. He looked into Flynn's eyes.

"I can honestly say that I have never thought of anyone but you while we've been together, not when we kiss, not when I hold you and definitely not when we slept together. I love you. Why don't you believe that?"

"I want to, I really do"

"Then do it"

He shook his head. "I can't, not right now. I don't know. Maybe I just need a couple of days, you know, try to sort it all out, get my head round things."

"What is there to sort out? I'm not with you because you remind me of Jackson, I've never compared you two and I never will but you don't believe me do you?"

"Please Aaron, just give me a couple of days."

"Ok, if that's what you want." Aaron let go of his hand. He reached out and touched the St Christopher he'd given to Flynn. "Remember what I said when I gave you this, it should tell you everything you need to know." He kissed him on the cheek before standing up and leaving.


	23. Chapter 23

**The Characters belong to Emmerdale and ITV  
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Aaron stomped down the road on his way to work, his trademark scowl firmly in place. He couldn't believe what was happening to him & Flynn, his worry and concern now replaced with anger. He wasn't angry at Flynn, he couldn't help how he felt but he was angry at the idiots who'd said those things to him in the first place and at life in general for spoiling something that had so far been really great. He saw Adam walking up the road towards him. Adam looked at him and smiled.

"Alright, mate" he said.

Aaron just kept walking.

"Hey, Aaron, what's wrong, has something happened?"

Aaron stopped and took a few deep breaths.

"Aaron, what is it? It's not Flynn is it?"

Aaron spun round and walked back towards Adam, standing toe to toe with him, their faces inches apart.

"Don't you mean Jackson mark two?"

Adam looked embarrassed. "Oh, he told you about that did he? I was just having a laugh, I didn't mean anything by it."

"Really?" Aaron said through gritted teeth. "Well, thanks to you having a laugh and a couple of other things that were said to him, he now thinks that I'm only with him because he reminds me of Jackson."

"You are joking, right"

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

"Oh mate, I'm sorry, I just thought…."

"No, Adam, that's the problem" Aaron interrupted him, "You didn't think. You opened your mouth when you should have kept it shut. You know nothing about what's happened to him in the past, things he's gone through and now, because of all this, I could lose him."

"Oh, come on, it's not really that bad is it?"

"Yeah, it is so you better stay away from me, right!"

He turned to walk away but Adam put his hand on his arm.

"Aaron, please."

Aaron pulled his arm away. "I said stay away. You've done enough damage." He stormed off down the road, Adam standing watching him go.

"What was that all about?" Paddy asked.

"You don't want to know."

"He was in a bad mood this morning. I barely got two words out of him."

Adam rubbed at his eyes. "What a mess."

"Look, come back to mine. I'll make us a brew and you can tell me what's going on."

Sitting in Paddy's kitchen, Adam told him about what had just taken place between him and Aaron. Paddy listened in silence. When Adam had finished, Paddy said "Oh no, I was one of the others. I said to Flynn that listening to him & Aaron was like listening to Aaron and Jackson all over again. I never gave it a thought."

"So I'm not the only idiot in the village then. He was so happy Paddy, I mean really happy and now look at him."

"Yeah, I know."

"Do you know where Flynn lives?"

"No, in town somewhere."

"Great, that's a big help. Don't suppose you know his number?"

"No, why would I have his number?"

"I don't know, do I? I'm sorry, I just feel like this is my fault and I should try to put it right. Maybe if I could talk to him, apologise, it might help."

Paddy stood up to put their empty mugs in the sink.

"I don't think you should get involved, if Aaron finds out, he'll go mad."

"So what's he gonna do, stop talking to me. He's already done that."

"I just think you should leave them alone. You talking to Flynn might make it worse."

"How could it be any worse?"

"Adam, Aaron's phone. It's over here. He must have forgotten it this morning."

"Great, give it here."

Paddy hesitantly handed Adam the phone. He began to go through it, looking for Flynn's number.

"Quick, write this down" he said as he found it "Now, read it back to me, make sure you've written it down right."

Paddy read it back and Adam nodded to say it was ok.

"Here, you better put this back. Once he realises he hasn't got it, he'll come back for it."

Paddy put it back where he'd found it. Less than five minutes later, the front door opened and Aaron came in. He looked at Adam and Paddy, then looked around the kitchen until he saw his phone. He picked it up and walked out without a word, slamming the door behind him.

"Are you sure about this?" Paddy asked.

"No but you just saw him, have you got a better idea?"

Paddy shook his head.

Adam took out his own phone and dialled Flynn's number.

"Hello Flynn, it's Adam...yeah, I know... I wondered if we could meet, I need to talk to you about the other night...don't be like that, please it's important...yeah I know it...alright, see you there."

He let out a deep breath and put his phone away.

"How'd he sound?"

"Not himself. He said he'd meet me at one."

Flynn ended the call with Adam and put his phone back in his pocket. He was where he always went when he needed to think, walking around the park, wrapped up against the weather with his hands pushed deeply into the pockets of his coat. He'd been thinking about the times he'd brought Aaron here. He was unrecognisable now from the Aaron he'd been back then. When they first came here, he had liked Aaron a lot, now he loved him so much it scared him. He was nineteen, same age as Aaron, and already struggling to imagine life without him. He'd been trying to think things through, the cold helping to keep him focussed. Deep down , he knew that Aaron loved him, that much was clear to him, the problem was why he loved him. He'd listened to Aaron that morning saying that he'd never compared him and Jackson and that he wasn't with him because he reminded him of Jackson but he knew what Jackson had meant to him. Could he be with Aaron when Aaron's last boyfriend had been one of those people that no matter how hard he tried, he would never be up to his standard? Could he be with Aaron if he was always going to be second best? He felt guilty as well. He was hurting Aaron because of his own insecurities and that was wrong. The comparisons he could probably get over, it was the overheard conversation that was the killer, that was what had really hurt. He took his hand out of his pocket to check the time. He'd better get going if he was to meet Adam on time.

When he got to the pub, Adam was already there nursing a glass of orange juice. He walked over and sat down. Adam looked at him sheepishly. Flynn didn't look great, making Adam feel even worse.

"Do you want a drink?" he said. Flynn shook his head.

"So, I didn't know you had my number."

"I don't. I borrowed Aaron's phone without him knowing and got it from there."

"So, he doesn't know you're here?"

Adam shook his head.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about then."

"About the other night, when I called you what I did. I don't know what I was thinking about. I shouldn't have said what I said and I'm sorry."

Flynn looked at him. "So, he spoke to you about it then."

"You could say he let me know how unimpressed he was with me, yeah. It was just a stupid remark. You're not really going to let it ruin everything between you are you?"

"It's not just what you said that's the problem."

"Well what is it then?"

"I heard you both, you and Aaron talking in the pub. I heard him say that he was only with me because I reminded him of Jackson , both of you laughing at me. Once I'd heard that, I left."

"Have you spoke to Aaron about this?"

Flynn shook his head.

"It's a shame you didn't stick around a bit longer."

"Why's that?"

"Because then you'd have heard what he said next, what he really thinks of you."

"What did he say?"

Adam thought for a minute. Should he tell Flynn or send him back to Aaron to ask him?

"I think you should talk to him about it. You might be pleasantly surprised."

Driving home, Flynn thought about what Adam had told him. He was right, the only way to try and get this sorted out was to talk to Aaron again. He would have to tell him he'd overheard him and Adam talking and see what he said. After all, if they didn't sort it out, he'd have no relationship with Aaron at all and he would end up losing him. After the length of time he had waited to finally get him, he really didn't want that to happen. He turned the car around at the earliest chance he got and headed towards the village.

Cain had been watching Aaron and he was worried. He'd been working hard enough but something was definitely up. Aaron, being his usual talkative self when he had a problem, had barely spoken all the time he'd been there and Cain had decided to just leave him alone. He turned to look at him again and smiled to himself.

"Aaron" he called.

"What? Look, if you've got something smart to say don't bother ok, I'm not in the mood."

"Looks like you've got a visitor" he said.

Aaron turned around to see Flynn standing there, looking a bit uncomfortable. He was pleased to see him but anxious too, not knowing what was going to happen next.

"Hi, how are you doing?"

"I've been better. You?"

"Same."

"I was wondering if we could talk" Flynn asked.

"I'd love to but I can't, not now. We're really busy with this rush job. How about later?"

"Yeah, ok, Shall I wait at your place?"

" Paddy's there all day. I mean, you can wait there but we won't be able to talk."

"Oh right, how about the pub then?"

"It's not really ideal is it?"

"Suppose not, no."

Cain couldn't stand it any longer. He'd tried not to listen but it was so quiet it couldn't be avoided. He felt sorry for them, seeing the two of them looking as miserable as sin in front of him.

"Oi" he shouted.

Aaron turned to glare at him. "What now?"

"Catch" he said as he threw a bunch of keys at him. "Use my place and don't come back til it's sorted."

"Are you sure?"

"Said so didn't I? Now get going before I change my mind."

Flynn smiled gratefully at him as he and Aaron walked off. They walked in silence, neither of them knowing what to say so deciding to say nothing. Aaron unlocked the door and he and Flynn went in, Aaron closing the door behind them.

"Do you want a drink or anything?" he asked Flynn, taking off his hooded top.

"No thanks, I'm fine." Flynn replied, putting his coat on a chair.

Flynn sat down on the sofa, Aaron sat down next to him. Both of them were nervous, neither liking the awkwardness that was now between them.

"So, I wasn't expecting to see you. I thought you said you needed a couple of days, not that I'm not pleased to see you cos I am" Aaron said smiling shyly at Flynn.

Flynn smiled back at him. "Well, I've been doing some thinking, a lot of thinking actually, and I want to get this sorted as soon as possible."

"Me too."

"I went to the park earlier, to think things through, and I was thinking about when me and you went there and you told me about Jackson and what happened to him. I know how much you loved him because you told me and now, I can't help feeling that I'll always be second best. No matter how hard I try, I'll never be as good as him in your eyes."

Aaron was shaking his head. "You are so wrong. You're not second best to anyone. I just wish I could get you to believe that."

"But that's how I feel, especially after hearing you and Adam in the pub the other night." Flynn's voice got quieter and he looked down, not able to look at Aaron anymore. "I overheard what you said about only being with me because I remind you of Jackson. That really hurt Aaron and that's what I'm really struggling with."

Aaron looked at Flynn, seeing how close he was to tears. Now it made more sense, him wanting to know why they were together.

"You obviously didn't hear the whole conversation or we wouldn't be sitting here now."

"What do you mean?"

Aaron took a deep breath. "After what you heard, I told Adam what an idiot he was for even thinking that was why I was with you. I said you were special and that I love you for being you, not for any other reason."

Flynn looked at Aaron. "You said that?"

Aaron smiled. "Yeah, I did and I meant it too. Look, when I've spoken to you before, about Jackson, I only told you about after the accident, I've never told you about before. I think now maybe I should."

"Aaron" Flynn said shaking his head "I don't think I can hear you talking about him, not now. It was different back then but now…."

Aaron turned his body to face Flynn's and took his hand in his. He looked Flynn straight in the eyes and said "Do you trust me?"

Flynn gazed at Aaron's face, into those blue eyes, knowing there was only one answer he could give.

"Of course I do."

"Then, listen to me, please."

Flynn nodded. "Ok" he sighed.

Aaron took a deep breath before he started speaking.

"When someone dies, you tend to remember only the good things. Anything else, you push to one side and forget about. Jackson and me, our relationship, was a constant merry go round of being together, splitting up, getting back together, splitting up again. Sometimes, it was his fault but most of the time, it was mine. I'd just come out and was struggling to cope, I wasn't the ideal boyfriend by any stretch of the imagination. We were both stubborn too which didn't help. When we were good, we were very, very good but when we were bad... He trailed off, lost in his thoughts for a moment.

"Anyway, that was just the way that we were. It didn't mean we didn't love each other, because we did, but I don't want you thinking that what me and Jackson had was this perfect relationship because it wasn't like that. I wasn't perfect and nor was he. It's easy to put him on a pedestal because he's not here anymore but he had his faults just like anyone else. That's why you've got nothing to worry about. Jackson is my past, there'll always be a part of me that loves him but it's you that I want a future with."

Flynn and Aaron looked at each other. Flynn knew he now had nothing to worry about, any insecurities he had just disappeared when he looked at the sincerity on Aaron's face. He threw his arms around Aaron and held him close. "And that's what I want too, a future with you. I'm so sorry, I promise I'll never doubt you again."

"Good, I'm pleased to hear it."

Flynn pressed his lips against Aaron's, his tender kiss quickly becoming more passionate, Aaron kissing him back the same way. Their hands began to wander as their feelings took over. Flynn pushed Aaron backwards and lay on top him. He trailed kisses down Aaron's neck as he pushed his T shirt up. Aaron lay there and groaned as Flynn's mouth reached his chest, featherlike kisses moving their way across his nipples before moving lower. Just as he was getting to the point of giving in completely to the sensations Flynn was creating, he remembered where they were.

"Flynn, stop" he gasped "we can't do this here. Cain would kill us if he found out."

"Well, I won't tell him if you don't" Flynn said his fingers tracing little patterns across Aaron's stomach.

"No, we can't, it's too risky."

"Where's your sense of adventure?"

"Just behind my sense of survival. It's not that I don't want to..."

"No, I can tell that" Flynn said smiling at him.

"You can talk." Aaron pushed him away gently.

"Ok" Flynn sighed, moving off Aaron "but you do know this means that I can't go home tonight, don't you?"

"And the reason for that would be" Aaron said, pulling his t-shirt back down.

"Once I start something, I have to finish it."

"Is that right? Good job I happen to be free tonight then, isn't it?" he said, kissing Flynn again.

Aaron locked the door behind them before they walked back round towards the garage. Aaron gave Cain his keys back.

"I hope you didn't get up to any of that funny stuff, not in my house."

"As if" Aaron said, looking at Flynn who just grinned at him.

"Look, it's gonna be dark soon. Why don't you get off and we'll start again tomorrow."

"Cheers Cain, I owe you one."

"One? Two or three at least, I'd say."

After a few pints in the pub and something to eat, they made their way back to Aaron's, killing time until they could go to bed, until Flynn could finish what he had started and they could put the last couple of days well and truly behind them.


	24. Chapter 24

Aaron woke up first, smiling at the feel of Flynn's body next to his. Last night, true to his word, Flynn had finished off what he started and Aaron had seen a whole new side to him which he liked - a lot. He wished he could stay in bed with Flynn but he had to get to work. He had the time he missed yesterday to make up and he wanted to get the job finished as soon as he could because he needed the money Cain had promised him. He looked at Flynn, sleeping peacefully next to him. He liked waking up with him there, he'd hated waking up on his own every morning. He slid slowly away from Flynn, not wanting to disturb him and managed to get out of bed without waking him. He noticed it was really quiet this morning, even for the village. He put some boxers on and went to look out of the window. The whole place was covered in snow, only a few inches, but it was enough to make Aaron smile. He loved the snow. There wasn't a sound, no birds, no vehicles, nothing. It was like a mute button had been pressed on the world. He turned around to start putting the rest of his clothes on but, you know what's it like, the quieter you try to be, the louder you end up being. He opened a drawer to take out a t-shirt and pushed it closed only he must have pushed it harder than he thought because it closed with a bang, waking Flynn up. Aaron pulled a face.

"I'm sorry, I was trying not to disturb you."

Flynn rubbed at his eyes. "It's fine, don't worry about it. I'll just go back to sleep when you leave."

"Rub it in why don't you" Aaron said pulling on his trackie bottoms and tucking them in to his socks." I suppose now you're awake you want a cup of tea?"

"You know me so well."

"Yeah, even more so after last night." They both smiled at the shared memory.

Aaron disappeared downstairs leaving Flynn to his thoughts. He was so pleased him and Aaron were ok and things were good between them again. He didn't want to feel as bad as he had done over those couple of days ever again. He sat up as the door opened and Aaron came in with the tea. He handed one to Flynn before sitting on the edge of the bed with the other. They chatted about this and that, nothing in particular, until the tea was drunk and it was time for Aaron to go to work.

"What you doing today then while some of us will be working hard?"

"Don't know really. Thought I might lie here for a while, maybe go back to sleep, and then, who knows? Is it ok if I have a shower though?"

"Yeah course it is, just make sure you lock the door, you don't want Paddy walking in on you."

"I don't know who'd get the biggest fright, me or him."

"Listen, I've been thinking. It doesn't make sense you having a shower here but no clean clothes to put on afterwards so, why don't you bring some clothes, a toothbrush, whatever you want over here and leave them here. That way, you'll always have something clean to put on the next day."

Flynn looked at Aaron. It was a simple idea but the fact that Aaron had thought of it and suggested it made him realise how far they had come. They really were a proper couple now.

"Are you sure?"

Aaron laughed. "Well, it's only gonna be a couple of T-shirts and some boxers isn't it? I'm sure I can find room for them somewhere."

"OK, I'll go home and get some stuff and bring it over. Thanks."

"No problem. Now I have to go or I'll be late" Aaron said kissing Flynn goodbye.

"Sure I can't persuade you to stay?"

"You and me both know you could persuade me to stay which is why I'm going now before you get the chance." He kissed him again. "I'll see you later ok."

"Yeah, see you later."

Aaron walked down the road to work, his footprints the only ones in the snow until he got to the garage where Cain was already at work.

"Alright" Aaron said.

"Alright. Well, you look a lot better today."

"Yeah, thanks again for yesterday."

"That's ok, anything that makes you easier to work with."

Aaron smiled at him.

"Hopefully, we'll get this done today so come on, get your hands dirty and then we can forget about work until the new year."

Back at Smithy Cottage, Flynn couldn't get back to sleep so he showered and got dressed. He pulled back the curtains and grinned when he saw the snow. He loved the snow, it made him feel like a kid again. He went downstairs where Paddy was sitting finishing off his breakfast.

"Morning" Flynn said.

"Hiya, would you like some breakfast?"

"It's ok, finish yours. I'll sort myself out later."

Flynn sat down at the table.

"Flynn, look, I owe you an apology. The other day, I should have thought before I opened my mouth, I should have realised it would have been something you didn't want or need to hear."

"Paddy, don't worry about it. It's fine, me and Aaron are fine so no harm done."

"Yeah but you weren't. I'd never forgive myself if I did anything that might spoil things for him, well, for both of you."

"Look, it wasn't just what you and Adam said. There was some other stuff going on too but like I said, we're fine. Stop worrying. Alright if I have some toast?"

"I'll get it, you stay there." Paddy was off his chair before Flynn could move. He could have got up and stopped him but he had a feeling Paddy wanted to get his breakfast for him so he stayed where he was. They chatted while he ate, Flynn still not quite believing how comfortable he felt here with Aaron's friends and family, especially as he and Aaron had been together less than a year and it was only quite recently that he'd started coming to the village.

" Right, thanks for breakfast, Paddy, I'd best be off."

"You're welcome, anytime. I take it you'll be back tonight."

"Unless I get a better offer."

"See you later then."

Flynn wandered down to the garage to let Aaron know he was going. As he went to turn the corner, he was faced with the sight of Aaron bent over, his head under the bonnet of a car. Cain was nowhere to be seen and this was too good an opportunity to miss. He picked up some snow, rolled it into a snowball and threw it at him, hitting him right on the bum. Aaron jumped, and turned to see who was standing there. Flynn was grinning at him.

"Did you just throw a snowball at me?"

"I might have done."

"You are so gonna pay for that."

"Come on then, give it your best shot."

Aaron made his own snowball and threw it at Flynn, missing him by inches.

"Is that the best you've got? You throw like a girl" Flynn said laughing.

"Right." Aaron threw another one, this time hitting Flynn on the leg. They spent the next few minutes throwing snowballs at each other, laughing out loud at the simple pleasure that throwing snowballs brought them, both of them acting more like five year olds than nineteen year olds. Their fun was interrupted by Cain coming out of the garage.

"If one of those hits me, whoever threw it is dead."

Flynn walked over to Aaron, brushing snow off his clothes, Aaron doing the same.

"I just came to tell you that I'm heading back home now."

"Alright, I don't know how long I'm going to be here, we're going to try and get it finished today so I'll call you later."

"Ok, speak to you then" Flynn said giving Aaron a quick kiss.

"Do I get one of those too?" Cain said.

"Sorry, they're for Aaron only. He doesn't like to share."

He winked at Aaron as he walked off, Aaron smiling as he watched him go. He turned to Cain.

"Right, let's see if we can get this finished then, shall we?" 

Flynn drove carefully home, the journey taking him a bit longer than usual. When he got home, his mum was there watching the TV.

"Hello love, alright?" she said.

Flynn flopped down into a chair. "Yeah, I'm fine."

How's Aaron?"

"He's good. He's working today, trying to get some job finished. I should be seeing him later."

"You'll have to bring him back round again. It's been a few weeks since we've seen him."

"Yeah, I will."

"Good. Oh, before I forget, me and your dad are going to visit Mick & Alison later. What with the weather being unpredictable, we'll stay overnight and be back some time tomorrow. So, you and Aaron can have the place to yourselves."

"Mum" Flynn said looking embarrassed.

"What, so you're not going to ask him to stay then? You're going to rattle around here on your own?"

Flynn just smiled.

"Thought not." She got up and went into the kitchen.

Flynn took out his phone and sent Aaron a text - got place to myself tonight. Mum & dad away til tomorrow. Fancy a change of venue? xx

A few minutes later, his phone beeped - sounds good. Be there as soon as I can xx 

Aaron finished work and went home to get showered and changed. They'd finished the job and Aaron put the money that Cain had given him in one of his drawers. He smiled, that would come in very handy. He went through the house like a whirlwind, wanting to get to Flynn's as quickly as he could and it was already after seven. He told Paddy he'd see him tomorrow and left to get the bus. The one and only time he'd spent the night at Flynn's house, he'd been virtually comatose having drunk while on antibiotics and Flynn had slept in the spare room. He knocked on Flynn's door, his breath visible in the night air. It was just starting to snow again. Flynn opened the door and let him in, the warmth of the house and Flynn's hug a welcome relief from the cold.

"Fancy a drink? Flynn asked.

"Yeah, beer would be good."

Flynn took a couple of bottles out of the fridge, opened them, handed one to Aaron and motioned for him to go into the other room.

"Did you get it all done then?" Flynn asked when they were seated next to each other on the sofa.

"Yeah, eventually, so no work for me now until after the new year."

" So, you don't have to rush off early tomorrow then?"

"No, I can stay as long as I want or until I get bored of you."

"Hey" Flynn said hitting him.

"I was thinking on the way over about the last time I slept here."

Flynn laughed. "Now there was a night. You were unconscious for most of it….…."

"Not going to happen tonight."

"I slept in the spare room…"

"Definitely not going to happen tonight."

"I even had to undress you."

"Now that_ can_ happen tonight" Aaron said smiling at Flynn who smiled back at him.

"Why don't we take these upstairs?" Flynn said.

"Thought you'd never ask" Aaron replied, standing up, waiting for Flynn to do the same.

They came back downstairs some time later to get something to eat. While Flynn was sorting out some food for them, Aaron watched him, noticing he was a bit quiet, his face a bit serious when he thought Aaron couldn't see. Aaron went up to him and put his arms around him.

"Hey, you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I was just thinking it would be nice if you could stay here more often, not only when mum & dad are away."

"I know, I'd like that too. It's not because of me is it? I mean, they're obviously fine about you being gay but is it that they just don't want it happening under their roof? If you were with a girl would it be different?"

"No, it's not that. Harrison used to have to do the same as we are, take whatever opportunity he could whenever he could. When college starts again, I won't have the same amount of spare time that I've got now and it would be lovely to think you could stay here once in a while, even if all we did was sleep."

Aaron smiled at him. "Well, at least we've got my place to go to so it could be worse. Besides, if we don't get the chance very often, it'll just be more special when we do won't it?"

"Now who knows the right thing to say."

"Well, there's a first time for everything I suppose. Now, are we going to eat or what cos I'm starving."

Flynn smiled and kissed him. "I love you" he said.

"And I love you too. Now please, can we eat before I pass out or something."

They ate their food and went back up to bed, lying snuggled together watching a DVD until they both fell asleep, another perfect evening spent together.


	25. Chapter 25

It was the middle of January, cold, gloomy and miserable. Life had gone back to its usual routine, Aaron was working, Flynn was going to college and they were back to seeing each other a couple of times a week if they were lucky. After the amount of time they had spent together over Christmas and New Year, they were struggling to adjust again. Aaron and Flynn were growing stronger as a couple all the time. Ever since Flynn's little wobble over their relationship, things had gone from strength to strength, both of them happier than they had ever been. Aaron knew he had nothing to prove to Flynn anymore but he wanted to do something nice for him, show him how much he loved him, how much he meant to him. He'd decided to take him away for the weekend. He'd trawled the internet for hours looking for the ideal place before he settled on a secluded cottage in the Lake District. It was perfect, just the place for him and Flynn to get away from everyone and everything for a couple of days, somewhere they could be alone, just the way they liked it. He'd used the money Cain had given him for helping with that rush job to pay for it and tonight, when he saw Flynn, he was going to surprise him with the news. They hadn't seen each other for a few days either so he was doubly excited.

Seven thirty on the dot, Aaron walked into Bar West looking for Flynn. He smiled when he saw him standing at the bar. Even after all this time, his stomach still turned somersaults when he saw him. He walked over until he was standing behind him. He slid his arms around his waist and hugged him tightly. "Hey you" he said. Flynn turned around to face him, a big smile on his face. "Alright" he said. "I am now" Aaron replied. Flynn put his arms around Aaron and pulled him towards him. They kissed as if it had been weeks since they'd last seen each other rather than just a few days. They separated and smiled at each other again.

"Sorry, I couldn't help myself" Flynn said looking slightly embarrassed.

"No need to apologise, I've missed you too" Aaron replied.

Flynn had already got their drinks so they picked them up and went to sit down, Flynn casually draping his arm across the top of the booth, his fingers gently stroking Aaron's shoulder as Aaron sat close, his hand resting on Flynn's thigh. He wanted to tell Flynn about the weekend right away but suddenly, he was overcome with nerves. It was stupid, he knew, but he couldn't help it. He took a large mouthful of his drink and looked at Flynn who was watching him.

"You ok?" Flynn asked.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. I wanted to ask you something."

"Oh right, go on then."

"You know we don't get to spend as much time together now as we'd both like to, right. Well, I was wondering if you'd like to come away with me for the weekend, this weekend."

"Are you serious?"

"No, I'm winding you up. Course I'm serious. I thought we could go Friday afternoon and come back on Sunday."

"Sounds great but aren't you working?"

"Cain's given me the time off, it's a bit quiet at the moment. He's also lending me a car which means I can drive. That way, I can keep where we're going a surprise."

"Sounds like you've got it all worked out."

"I have. I just need you to say you'll come with me." Aaron's eyes locked onto Flynn's as he waited for his answer. Flynn's heart started to beat faster as he looked at the face of the man he loved.

"I can't think of anything I'd rather do than spend the whole weekend with you."

Aaron's face broke into a smile. He leant forward and kissed Flynn again, no words needed to say how happy he was.

"So, can you give me a clue where we're going?" Flynn asked.

"No, my lips are sealed."

"Please, just a little one."

Aaron laughed. "No, you'll just have to wait and see. All I will say is that we'll have a great time."

"I'm sure we will."

Friday soon came round although to Aaron and Flynn, it had seemed to take forever to arrive. The snow was still on the ground, the sky overcast and threatening more snow. Aaron had packed his bag the night before when he was too excited to sleep. All he could think about was him and Flynn and a whole weekend to do whatever they wanted. He couldn't wait. He'd been up really early and just wanted the time to pass by so they could leave. He went downstairs to collect the phone number of the guy he'd rented the cottage from and put it in his pocket. He checked the watch that Flynn had bought him. He had an hour before he had to go and collect him so he started to make himself something to eat before being interrupted by a knock on the door. He opened it and was shocked to see Flynn standing there, his bag in his hand and a smile on his face.

"What are you doing here? You're supposed to be at college" Aaron said, standing aside to let him in.

"I know but as if I could concentrate knowing we're going away this afternoon. I emailed them and said I had a virus and wouldn't be in. I've been driving Harrison mad at home trying to kill time, looking at my watch every few minutes. I've checked and rechecked my bag loads of times. In the end, he said if I wanted to live long enough to enjoy the weekend, I'd better leave so I did."

"And breathe" Aaron said laughing. He'd never seen Flynn like this, he was like a child at Christmas. "So, you're looking forward to it then?"

"I may be a little bit excited about it, yeah. You?"

"Yeah, me too. Come on, we'll have something to eat and then set off."

An hour or so later, their bags were in the car and they were on the road. Once they'd got out of the village and onto the main roads, they were able to drive at virtually normal speed, the snow not causing any problems. Aaron reckoned it would take them a couple of hours especially as most of their journey would be on motorways. Flynn sat back and smiled.

"Makes a change to be sat on this side of the car. So, now can you let me have a clue where we're going."

"Nope, told you, my lips are sealed. Just sit back and relax. You'll find out soon enough."

"Ok." Flynn reached over and put his hand on Aaron's thigh.

Aaron glanced over at him and smiled." And you better keep that still too, I need to concentrate."

"I won't move it, I promise. I'll be good."

They made good time, the journey passed pleasantly enough, both of them talking and laughing without a care in the world. The journey became more time consuming the closer they got to their destination as the snow was deeper and they were back on minor roads. Aaron parked the car in a supermarket car park and switched off the ignition.

"Wow, you take me to the best of places, don't you? You really know how to show me a good time" Flynn said, smiling.

"I can show you a good time later. Right now, I need to get some food to bring with us."

"So, we're self catering then are we?"

"Who's a clever boy" Aaron said. "Come on, you can help me choose what we bring."

Shopping placed in the boot, they were back on the road within half an hour. It was snowing now, everyone driving slower, being that extra bit more cautious. Aaron drove through the town and out into the countryside, their destination close by. He saw the sign advertising the cottages and turned off the main road onto a side road that was terrible to drive on. The road was full of twists and turns as they left civilisation behind. They rounded a bend and there it was, the little cottage that was to be their home for the next couple of days. The lights were on and there was smoke coming out of the chimney. Aaron stopped the car just behind another car that was parked there.

"Well, this is it. Home sweet home, well, for a couple of days."

Flynn looked at the cottage and smiled.

"Aaron, this is great, I never expected anything like this."

They got out of the car and, as they did so, the front door of the cottage opened and a man came walking towards them.

"Mr Livesy?" he said.

"That's me" Aaron said shaking the man's outstretched hand.

"How was your journey, not too bad I hope."

"No, it was fine."

"Good. Well, here's your key, the fire's lit and there's more logs inside. Tea, coffee and some other essentials are in the cupboards. I take it you've got my number in case you need anything."

"Yeah, I have thanks."

"Right, well, enjoy your stay." He got into his car and drove off.

Flynn and Aaron looked at each other with big grins on their faces. They unloaded the car and took everything inside before locking the door behind them.

The cottage consisted of an open plan living room and kitchen, two bedrooms and a bathroom. The living room was dominated by a massive fireplace which had a log fire roaring away in it. On one wall were some shelves containing board games, playing cards and DVD's. Aaron leant against one of the cupboards in the kitchen and watched as Flynn had a wander around. He seemed really happy, it looked like he'd made the right choice bringing him here.

"Look at that fire, I can't believe we've got a log fire, it's so cosy and they've even got your favourite DVD" Flynn said, waving a copy of ET at Aaron.

"I am not watching that" Aaron said laughing "so you can put it back where you found it." Flynn put it back on the shelf.

"I'm just going to the loo" he said. Aaron took the opportunity to put their shopping away listening to the floorboards creak as Flynn moved around upstairs. He was back a couple of minutes later.

"You should see the bathroom. There's a massive shower in there, easily enough room for two" he said smiling at Aaron.

"Sounds good." Aaron said. His face grew serious temporarily. "So, what do you think, really."

Flynn walked over to him and put his arms around him.

"I think it's perfect and I think you're perfect too."

He kissed Aaron softly and slowly to start with, Aaron responding instantly but it wasn't long before their desire for each other started to take over, their kisses becoming harder, more demanding. Aaron pushed himself against Flynn, Flynn holding him against himself as their hands explored each other's bodies. Aaron moved his mouth away from Flynn's planting little kisses across his neck before biting gently on Flynn's earlobe. Flynn groaned as Aaron pushed him back slightly, his hands now roaming over the front of Flynn's body, Aaron gasping as Flynn's movements mirrored his own.

"I think we need to move somewhere else, don't you?" Aaron said.

He led Flynn across the room and towards the stairs. Flynn stopped him.

"What's wrong with here, in front of the fire."

"Are you kidding, we'll get splinters."

"Not if we put something on the floor we won't. There's two duvets upstairs. Come on, what do you say."

Aaron smiled. "Let's go get them then."

With one duvet underneath them, and the other thrown on the sofa for later, it didn't take long for them to get back to where they'd been a few minutes ago. Clothes discarded, nothing mattered to either of them except making sure that the other one experienced the maximum amount of pleasure and satisfaction possible before then satisfying their own needs. Their lovemaking was getting better and better too, each now more sure of what the other liked, what the other wanted and needed. Despite their youth and relative inexperience, they both knew that what they felt for each other, what they had was something not everyone got to experience. It was a deep connection that was far more than physical and impossible for them to put into words. It was something they just knew.

Lying together afterwards, Flynn with his head on Aaron's chest, arm across his stomach, Aaron with his arms around him, holding him close, neither wanted to do anything except stay right where they were. They had no idea what the time was and didn't care either.

"Aaron" Flynn said.

"Mmm"

"Thank you for doing this, arranging this whole weekend away."

Aaron kissed the top of his head "You're welcome but it should be me thanking you, for helping me to get my life back. If it hadn't been for you…"

Flynn silenced him by kissing him, a kiss full of love, nothing else.

"Hey, come on, that's all behind us now. Only happy thoughts allowed, remember. Now, I'm going for a shower and if you're not up there with me in a couple of minutes, there'll be trouble." He walked over to the bottom of the staircase before turning round to look at Aaron. "Two minutes, ok."

Aaron smiled. He lay there until he heard the shower get switched on before standing up and making his own way up the stairs. When they came back downstairs again, they had something to eat, drank a few beers, watched a couple of DVD's snuggled up on one of the sofas and eventually fell into bed some time in the early hours of the morning.

When Aaron woke up the next morning, he was on his own. From downstairs, he could smell bacon and he realised where Flynn was. Pulling on some boxers, he went downstairs to find him.

"Morning" he said.

"I think it just about is still morning, yeah. Haven't even looked at my watch. Hungry?"

"Always, you know that. Bloody hell, it's cold down here. I'll see you back upstairs."

"Er, hang on a minute, it's ready now, you take these and I'll bring the rest" Flynn said, handing Aaron two mugs. It was definitely warmer upstairs so they were quite happy to stay there and eat their breakfast. They then got dressed and went downstairs.

Aaron threw himself on the sofa looking at Flynn.

"You better get that fire going, get some heat down here."

"And what's stopping you from doing it?"

"Well, I wasn't the one in the scouts was I? You must have learnt how to light a proper fire with logs and stuff" Aaron said picking up the remote to switch the TV on.

"Logs and stuff? Very technical. I'll do the fire if you make me a coffee, how's that?"

"Deal"

Flynn soon had the fire going and they settled down in front of the TV. There were never any awkward silences between them, they always found something to talk about, laugh about, any silences that did happen were comfortable ones, borne out of two people completely at ease with each other. Bored with what was on the TV, they switched over to some music station just for background noise as they decided what to do.

"We could play cards" Aaron said.

"No, don't really fancy it. How about Scrabble?"

"Scrabble? Do I look like the sort of person who plays Scrabble?"

"Why, what does someone who plays Scrabble look like?"

"Not like me, that's for sure, next idea."

"Ok then, Snakes & Ladders."

Aaron looked at him "Now you're being ridiculous."

Flynn took the game of the shelf and sat down on the floor, taking the board out of the box. "But you haven't played by my rules before though have you?"

"And are they any different to the proper rules?"

"Yes and no. You still play the game in the normal way but, when you land on a ladder, you get to take an item of clothing off the other person, when you land on a snake, you have to take something of your own off."

"But what happens if we've both got nothing on and no one's won the game?" Aaron asked.

"If we're both here with no clothes on and you're still wondering about who wins the game then we're in trouble" Flynn said laughing.

Aaron grinned and sat on the floor. "Now I'm interested but I'm going first."

"Be my guest" Flynn said handing Aaron the dice. Aaron rolled the dice and got the game under way. It wasn't long before items of clothing were being removed as both of them giggled and teased each other. Before long, they were both down to just their boxers, each casting glances over the other one's body, admiring the muscle tone and wondering how much longer they could hold out. Flynn was closer to winning the game than Aaron was but not for long.

"Why don't you get us a drink and I'll take your go for you" Aaron said. Flynn looked at him suspiciously. "Ok but no cheating."

"Would I?" Aaron said trying to look innocent. He rolled the dice. "You got a five." He moved Flynn's counter along the board, four would have put him on a snake. Aaron smiled to himself.

"Oh dear, you landed on a snake."

Flynn put the bottles down and sat back down on the floor again. He looked at Aaron.

"Now, there's a surprise. What are the odds of me landing on a snake?"

Aaron shrugged. He leant over and put his finger inside the waistband of Flynn's boxers pulling them away from his body and letting go.

"So, come on then, you know the rules, get them off."

Flynn stood up and took them off. He lay back on the floor, hands behind his head, watching Aaron, seeing the effect that him being naked was having on him, after all, you can't hide much when you're only wearing boxers. Having said that, you can hide even less when wearing nothing at all. Aaron's eyes travelled up Flynn's body until they eventually stared into Flynn's. Seeing the desire, the wanting, the lust in Flynn's eyes nearly sent him over the edge. Discarding his own underwear, he launched himself at Flynn, nothing slow and tender this time. This time, for both of them, it was about satisfying an urgent need and satisfying it as quickly as humanly possible. Bathed in sweat afterwards, both of them breathless and gasping for air, neither knew quite what to say so they said nothing. They just lay there recovering, lying next to each other. Eventually, Flynn turned to look at Aaron who smiled back at him, still red faced.

"Well, that was kind of unexpected" Aaron said.

"Yeah, you can say that again."

"I'll never think of Snakes and Ladders in the same way ever again." They both laughed. Aaron sat up, kissed Flynn quickly on the lips and started to put his clothes back on.

"What are you doing?" Flynn asked.

"Getting something to eat. I seem to have worked up an appetite."

The rest of the day they spent doing very little, the night they spent making love as slowly as possible, this time making it last as long as possible before falling asleep in each other's arms. After breakfast the next day, which they ate at lunchtime, it was time to leave. They checked they hadn't left anything behind, left the key in the kitchen as they'd been asked to do, shut the door and then put their bags back in the car.

"I really don't want to go back" Flynn said.

"No, me either but we have to. There's nothing stopping us from coming back though."

Flynn smiled at Aaron. "I'd like that."

"Yeah, so would I. Come here" he said pulling Flynn close to hug him.

"Thank you again for the best weekend, Aaron."

"You're welcome. Come on, we better get going."

They got into the car and Aaron started the engine. "Oh, nearly forgot" he said leaning over to kiss Flynn one more time before they left. "I meant to tell you last night and this morning but I forgot. I love you."

Flynn smiled. "I love you too."

Seat belts on, they set off, Aaron driving slowly, neither of them wanting to get back to reality again any quicker than they had to.


	26. Chapter 26

January turned in to February and then March arrived with it's mixture of sunshine and showers. Aaron and Flynn's weekend away was a distant happy memory and an experience they wanted to repeat as soon as they could. They had woken up within seconds of each other. The night before had been one of those rare occasions where Flynn could stay over during the week. He was going away with college for a few days so he didn't have to be in as early as usual. They had therefore made the most of it. Flynn got up first to go and have a shower and when he came back, Aaron was exactly where he had left him.

"Hey, sleeping beauty, time you were getting up."

Aaron opened his eyes and looked at Flynn, smiling, his eyes roaming up and down Flynn's body which was still covered in droplets of water.

"I've got a better idea" he said, his eyes dancing with mischief as he reached out to grab Flynn.

"I bet you have but you'll have to be quicker than that" Flynn said jumping back out of Aaron's reach, grinning as he dried himself.

"Come back to bed, you know you want to. We don't have to get up just yet do we?" Aaron pleaded.

"Yes, we do and you can stop looking at me like that as well, it's not going to work, not this morning anyway." He threw the wet towel at Aaron and it landed on his chest. Aaron picked it up and threw it back, Flynn managing to dodge it as it flew through the air. He opened the drawer where his clean clothes were kept and started to get dressed. Aaron got out of bed with a sigh and put on the boxers he had discarded the night before. As he went to walk past Flynn, he felt an arm pull him back and Flynn kiss him which he responded to instantly.

"If you're quick, we can have breakfast before I have to go" Flynn said, slapping Aaron's bum as he walked off.

Breakfast eaten, Flynn and Aaron left the cottage. They walked over to where Flynn's car was parked, chatting and laughing as Flynn opened the driver's door and got in. Aaron bent down and they kissed goodbye before Flynn drove off and Aaron set off down the hill towards work. As he got level with Dale Head, Hazel was waiting outside.

"Alright" he said "Up early or just coming in?"

"Just coming in? Just couldn't sleep more like. I don't suppose we could have a chat could we?"

"Now?"

"No, no, how about lunchtime. I could get you something to eat."

"Ok, that'd be great. See you later."

When lunchtime came, Aaron knocked on the door and waited for Hazel to open it. She let him in and they sat and ate their lunch chatting quite contentedly but Aaron could see Hazel was distracted.

"So, how's things with you and Flynn?"

Aaron smiled. "They're good, really good in fact."

"Great, I'm pleased to hear it. And your weekend away, how was that?"

"That was good too." Aaron's face grew serious. "Look, Hazel, you didn't ask me round here to talk about me and Flynn. What's on your mind, is it Jackson's anniversary coming up?" It was two weeks away.

She looked at him without saying a word.

"You didn't honestly think I'd forgotten did you?"

"No, no course not. Has anyone said anything to you about if we're doing something to remember him."

"Only Adam and Paddy, I said I didn't know, I'd have to talk to you."

"Everyone's been asking me but I don't know what to do. What do you think about a memorial service in the church?"

"No, no way. That would be like going through his funeral all over again and I barely got through that the first time round. Besides, he wasn't religious, it would feel a bit false."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. You got any bright ideas?"

"Well, Jackson always liked a good party didn't he? Why don't we just get everyone to meet in the pub and have a few drinks in his memory there. If you asked him what he'd prefer, a service in the church or a few beers in the pub, what would he say?"

"He'd say the pub." She was still unsure. It didn't seem like much of a way to remember him but he had been the life and soul of many a party before his accident, and a couple afterwards so maybe it wasn't such a bad idea after all.

"Alright, I'll speak to Diane and get something sorted."

When Aaron left work that evening, she called him over to say it was all arranged. They were going to meet at twelve o'clock on the day, that way anyone who wanted to visit Jackson's grave would have all morning in which to do so. They just had to tell everyone now.

The day before Jackson's anniversary, Aaron and Flynn were at Flynn's place watching a DVD. Aaron was quiet, Flynn could feel the tension in his body as Aaron leant against him.

"Hey, you ok?" Flynn said stroking the back of Aaron's neck.

"Yeah, just thinking about tomorrow. If I'm honest, I'm dreading it. It's just going to bring everything flooding back. I wish you were going to be there with me."

"Aaron, you know if you ever need me, I'm there, no questions asked but tomorrow is for people who knew and loved Jackson and I don't fit into either of those categories. You do though, it's something you need to do on your own. It wouldn't be right if I was there. I'll be thinking of you though" he said kissing the top of Aaron's head. Flynn could feel Aaron start to relax a little so he carried on talking.

"Besides, it doesn't have to be a sad occasion, think of it as a celebration of his life, a chance to remember the good times, talk about the happy memories people have of him."

Aaron nodded. He hadn't thought about it like that before. Maybe he didn't need to dread it after all. It would obviously be emotional and sad too but like Flynn said, maybe not for the whole day. The funeral had been the place to mourn Jackson, tomorrow could be something different. Aaron turned his body round so he could hug Flynn. He just needed to be held, to feel safe and secure and protected. Sensing that's what Aaron needed, Flynn just held him in his arms until Aaron left to go home.

The next morning, Aaron woke up to a cold but sunny day. His mind wandered back to that day a year ago and the weeks that followed. It was the worst thing he had ever experienced, the days when he didn't know if he wanted to live anymore, the pain of living without Jackson, the endless tears and the feeling of emptiness and loss that had hung over him like a cloud. Then, he'd met Flynn again and, with his help and support had managed to rebuild his life. Without him, he really didn't know what he would have done. He thanked his lucky stars that he had had Jackson and Flynn in his life. Jackson who had helped him become the person he was today, who had showed him it was ok to be himself, to have feelings and to let them show and now Flynn who had turned his existence back into a life worth living and who had made him happy again.

He looked at the clock, it was just before 9 o'clock. Three hours to go. He got up, got dressed and went downstairs to get some breakfast. Paddy was sitting there reading the newspaper.

"Alright, fancy one of my special breakfasts?

"Yeah, go on then" Aaron replied. He sat down and picked up the paper that Paddy had been reading, not because he was interested, more for something to do, keep his mind occupied.

"So, how are you this morning?" Paddy asked.

"Ok, I think. Not sure how I'll be later but.."

"Yeah, I know. This is the last big hurdle, you do realise that, don't you? I mean, you've already gone through the first Christmas without him, his birthday, your birthday, this is the last one."

"Doesn't make it any easier though does it?" Aaron said quietly.

"No, I know. I can't believe it's been a year already. Where does the time go?"

"I don't know. So, are you getting me this breakfast then or what?"

"Coming right up."

After eating his breakfast, he went back up to his room. He just wanted some time on his own before having to go to the pub. He was lying on his bed when his phone beeped with a message. He read it and smiled. It was from Flynn. It read: Thinking of you. Hope it goes ok. Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow xx

The next couple of hours seemed to drag. Why was it when you wanted time to go quickly, it never did? As 12 o'clock got closer, Aaron began to feel more anxious. Paddy shouted up the stairs. "Aaron, I'm going. See you in the pub later."

"Ok, see you later" he shouted back. He stood up and looked at himself in the mirror, the sunlight catching on the silver chain of Jackson's that he still wore. He took a few deep breaths before going downstairs. He left the cottage to walk to the cemetery. He was pleased to see that he was on his own. Jackson's grave was full of flowers again, people must have been visiting it all morning. He walked up and crouched down by the headstone.

"Alright mate" he said "looks like someone's popular today. Bet you're loving all this attention, aren't you? I can't believe you've been gone a year now, it's not the same without you. I still miss you sometimes. I'd love to be able to talk to you one more time, hear you laugh again, see you pull one of your funny faces. I know you wanted me to move on, meet someone else and I have done. I'm happy again and I'd like to think you'd be happy for me. Doesn't mean that a part of me doesn't still love you though, I hope you know that. You don't get rid of me that easily. There's a pub full of people waiting to have a drink on your behalf. I wish you were still here to join us. Even after all this time, they want you to know that you haven't been forgotten, mind you, how could anyone who knew you ever forget you, I certainly won't." A solitary tear rolled down his cheek which he wiped away. "Anyway, I better get going I suppose before they send out a search party. Sleep well, mate" he whispered. He stood up and walked away, heading towards the pub.

From where he was standing, Flynn watched Aaron leave. He didn't want Aaron to see him, he didn't want him to know he was there. He knew what time they were all meeting in the pub, Aaron would probably be the last to arrive. He waited for another five minutes just to make sure that no one else was going to turn up. When he was as sure as he could be that no one else was on their way, he made his way to the small cemetery, to Jackson's grave. He stood there for a few minutes in silence. Judging by the amount of flowers that had been left, Jackson had been well loved. This had seemed like a good idea this morning, something he felt he needed to do but now he was here, he wasn't so sure. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other then cleared his throat before speaking.

"I know we didn't know each other, we only met once and it wasn't exactly in the best of circumstances was it? I'm sorry about that. I just wanted to say to you that you don't need to worry anymore, about Aaron, I mean. I promise I'll look after him. I know how special he is and I'll do whatever it takes to make him happy, just like you did. I love him so much and I never forget how lucky I am to be with him, well, you know better than anyone what I mean. He'll always love you, I know that, but I don't mind anymore. I understand how special you were to him. After everything you both went through, how could you not be? Anyway, I just wanted you to know so you can rest peacefully. I'll take good care of him." He turned away from Jackson's grave only to see Hazel standing a few feet away.

"Hazel, I, I'm sorry, I was hoping nobody would see me. I thought Aaron was the last visitor. I know I'm the last person you want to see today of all days. I was just leaving. Sorry." He put his head down and walked past her.

"Flynn" she called after him. "I heard what you were saying." Her words stopped him in his tracks and he turned round. "Did you mean it all?" Her eyes were fixed firmly on his, her expression not easy to read.

"Yeah, yeah I did, every word." Flynn had never felt so uncomfortable in his life.

"You're right you know. He was a very special person and he loved Aaron more than anything in the world but do you know what he wanted most for him in the end? To be happy, to have a life again after he'd gone." Her voice was beginning to break up. She took a deep breath and composed herself. "I've seen Aaron as low as he could possibly be and it wasn't a pretty sight but, when I see him now, whether he's on his own or with you, the one thing that stands out a mile is how happy he is. He's got his life back and it seems to me that that's because of you. So, it looks like my boy got his wish after all." She smiled at him and Flynn smiled back.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Go on" Hazel replied.

"Aaron doesn't know that I'm here. This is something I wanted to do, felt like I had to do. I wanted to talk to Jackson, let him know that Aaron's ok, that he doesn't have to worry about him anymore. Sounds stupid, doesn't it?"

"No, it doesn't. You're not telling him anything new. I've told him the exact same thing myself during one of our many one sided chats."

"Anyway, I don't know how Aaron would feel about it so please, can we keep this just between us?"

Hazel couldn't help but like Flynn. He'd meant what he'd said, she could tell and his love for Aaron was clear for anyone to see. Hard as it was to admit, she could see why Aaron loved him so much too. She smiled at him "It's ok, your secret's safe with me."

"Thank you" Flynn said. He walked away, heading back to the place just outside the village where he'd left his car. He felt a bit better, he was glad he came. It was almost like he had Jackson's permission to be with Aaron now, he knew it sounded ridiculous but that was how he felt.

Twenty minutes later, Hazel walked into the pub. Aaron walked straight up to her. He could see she looked upset so he said nothing, just hugged her. "Trust you to be the last one to get here. Still, you always did like to make an entrance."

"Yeah, sorry, I've been up at the grave."

"Right. Well, you're here now, what are you having, the usual."

"Yes please love, thanks."

Hazel looked around the pub, at all the people who wanted to be here to remember her son. He'd made a big impact in a short amount of time. Some people lived a lot longer than he had and were never loved liked Jackson was. She felt proud. Aaron handed her a drink.

"Cheers, you're a good lad Aaron" Hazel said.

"Yeah well, let's keep that between us shall we, I'm supposed to have this reputation, remember? Come on, we're sitting over here." They walked over to the table where Paddy, Cain, Bob and Adam were already sitting and sat down. There was a bit of an awkward silence, no one really knew what to say. "I suppose we should say something, you know, to everyone, thank them all for being here and all that" Hazel said.

"Yeah, I suppose we should, hadn't really thought about it" Aaron replied.

"Will you come with me. I don't think I can stand up there in front of everyone on my own."

Aaron swallowed hard. "Yeah, course I will as long as you do the talking."

"Ok."

They both stood up and walked over towards the bar before turning to face everyone. The pub fell silent.

"I'm not normally lost for something to say as you all know, but today I am. A year ago today, I lost my son, Aaron lost his boyfriend and the world lost a very special person. It was only with the help of every single one of you here that we got through it. Thank you doesn't seem like enough for what you all did for us but it's all I can think of to say right now. So, please raise your glasses to Jackson, my boy."

"To Jackson" everyone said.

Hazel turned to Aaron whose eyes were looking downwards. She squeezed his hand and he squeezed hers back.

"You ok love?" she asked.

"Yeah, course I am. Are you?"

"Yeah. Come on, I need that drink" she said.

As they went to sit down again, Diane's voice broke the silence.

"Hazel, Aaron, before you sit down, I'd like to say something. Now, we like to think we're a friendly lot here and we welcome everybody who passes through here no matter how short or long their stay. Every once in a while, someone lives here who changes things, makes a difference. Jackson was one of those people. We all know how he touched Aaron's life but he touched other people's lives too. He brightened Pearl's days on numerous occasions with that lovely smile of his, Paddy & Chas gained an extra son, I loved talking to him, he was a cheeky one that's for sure but he never had a bad word to say about anyone unless they hurt the people he cared about. I even heard that Cain thought he was alright, high praise indeed." Everyone turned to look at Cain who just nodded his head. "So, Hazel, if you don't mind, we'd like to put this on the wall behind the bar. He became one of us and we'd all like to remember him, not just today but every day."

She picked up a photo and showed it to Hazel and Aaron. They saw it was a copy of the one that Aaron had given Hazel for Christmas. Hazel looked at Bob.

"Was this your doing?"

"Guilty" he said holding his hands up.

"I don't know what to say" Hazel said wiping away her tears. "He'd have been chuffed, he really would, to know he was so highly thought of. Thank you." Diane hugged her and went back behind the bar to sort the photo out. Aaron, with his head down, walked straight out of the pub.

They all looked at each other, not knowing whether to go after him or not.

"I'll give him a couple of minutes and go after him" Chas said.

She walked out of the pub to see Aaron sat at one of the tables, his head in his hands. She took a deep breath and went over.

"How you doing, kid" she said.

"I promised myself I wouldn't cry, look at the state of me."

She sat down next to him. "Well, I won't tell if you don't."

They sat together in silence.

"It's weird you know" Aaron said wiping his eyes "I haven't cried about Jackson in ages if you don't count right now, haven't really thought about him too much either, not recently anyway. Does that make me a bad person? I mean, he was my world."

"No love, course it doesn't make you a bad person. When you lost Jackson, that's when you did all your crying. You've just moved on, that's all, just like he wanted you to."

Aaron shook his head and took a deep breath.

"This is wrong" he said quietly.

"What is love?"

Aaron turned to look at his mum, his blue eyes still teary, a look of anguish on his face.

"If I'm not a bad person, then tell me why I'm sitting here on Jackson's day wishing Flynn was here to hold me and make me feel better. How can I do that?"

Chas looked at her son. She was the last person Aaron should be having this conversation with, her private life was not exactly successful and she had a habit of saying the wrong thing. She took a deep breath and tried to engage her brain before she opened her mouth.

"Oh Aaron, like I said love you've moved on. When we're sad, we all want the person we love to be there with us and for you now that's Flynn. It doesn't mean that Jackson means any less to you, just that Flynn now means more. Does that make sense?"

"Kind of."

"Look, I know I'm not Flynn but I am here, I can give you a hug if you want one." She held her arms out and waited, wondering what Aaron would do.

Aaron smiled and hugged her, more tears falling as Chas held him tightly.

"So, are you ready to come back inside then?" she said.

"Yeah, I am. Come on" he said as he stood up.

They walked the few steps back towards the pub in silence.

"Mum" Aaron said. Chas turned to look at him. "Thanks."

"Anytime kid."

They walked back into the warmth of the pub to hear talking and laughing. People were telling stories about Jackson, remembering things he'd said or done. Aaron sat back down just as Cain was telling a story about how Jackson had pretended to flirt with him and reliving some of the banter they used to share. Aaron started to relax. This was better, this was what Jackson would have wanted, people having a good time, not sitting there feeling miserable. They teased Aaron about things that had happened during his and Jackson's relationship, things which he wouldn't have found funny at all at one point but now, he could laugh along with the rest of them. The afternoon went well, not half as bad as Aaron had at first thought it might be. The time passed by quite quickly and the alcohol flowed freely. Diane brought out some food which was great for soaking up some of the alcohol. Hazel looked with pride at Jackson's photo, now on the wall next to some of the other well thought of villagers. She looked around at the faces of her friends and realised that, despite losing Jackson, she still had a lot to be thankful for. Later that night, Aaron and Paddy staggered up the hill. Paddy eventually opened the door and stood to one side so Aaron could go in. He wanted to go straight to bed so he said goodnight and went upstairs. As he lay in bed, through the alcohol induced haze, he thought about what Paddy had said to him earlier, about this being the last major hurdle he had to get past and he'd done it. Jackson was part of his past now, gone but never forgotten. He had a new chapter of his life open now, a life with Flynn that was good and happy and everything he could ever want and was only possible because of Jackson. And, he still had Hazel, a living reminder of Jackson, someone he could talk to should he need to, spend some time with every so often and someone who he would always have a special bond with. He went to sleep thinking what a lucky guy he actually was.


	27. Chapter 27

**Thank you to everyone who is still reading my story, I really appreciate it.**

**The lyrics are from Just The Way You Are by Bruno Mars.**

* * *

><p>Aaron woke up the next morning with the hangover from hell. Providing he didn't move or even blink, he was fine. He sat up and waited for the room to stop spinning before heading off to the bathroom. He got into the shower and grimaced as the water feeling like little daggers hit off his head and his body. Gradually, the pain eased off and by the time he'd cleaned his teeth and got dressed, he felt a bit more human. He couldn't face breakfast so he left to go and meet Flynn. Travelling by bus was not the ideal way to travel with a hangover especially on an empty stomach but he made it, just. When he got to Flynn's, he was feeling pretty rough again. He knocked on the door and waited. Flynn opened the door with a big grin on his face.<p>

"Oh my god, look at the state of you" he said laughing "how much did you have?"

"Too much" Aaron said "now are you going to let me in or what?"

"Or what. Come on, let's go" he said pushing Aaron backwards and shutting the door behind them.

"Why, where are we going?"

"Out in the fresh air, blow the cobwebs away."

They got into Flynn's car and he drove to the country park.

"You're not going to make me walk around here are you?"

"Yep, then we'll go for something to eat and see if we can get you back to yourself."

"Lucky me."

They got out of the car and began a slow walk. It wasn't too bad actually, the fresh air was making Aaron feel a bit better. They veered off the beaten track and deeper into the woods.

"So, how was yesterday?" Flynn said.

"Alright. It was a bit emotional to start with, you know, but then we just sat around, had a few drinks, well, a lot of drinks and talked about him. It was funny, a lot of the stuff we talked about I'd forgotten had even happened. It was nice to go over those memories again. We all ended up having a good laugh."

"Good, I'm glad. Told you it didn't have to be something awful, didn't I? See, you didn't need me there after all."

Aaron stopped and turned to face him.

"That's not exactly true. I er I got upset and left the pub for a few minutes. I was sitting outside and all I wanted was for you to give me a hug. I did need you and it was horrible not having you there. I had to settle for one from me mum which was a pretty poor substitute."

Flynn smiled at him.

"Well, I'm here now" he said hugging him "and I'm not going anywhere."

Aaron held him tightly ."Promise?"

"I promise. After the length of time you kept me waiting to get you in the first place, trust me, I'm going nowhere." He kissed Aaron, gently, tenderly trying to show through his kiss just how deep his feelings were.

"Look, I'm really sorry to mention this now but I won't be able to see much of you next week, I've got that college assignment to do and it has to be handed in on Friday."

"Oh, right, I see." Aaron couldn't keep the disappointment out of his voice.

"I don't like it any more than you do but if I don't hand it in on time, it's nearly a year's work down the drain. I could meet you for lunch one day if you like."

Aaron nodded his head. "Ok, I suppose that's the price I've got to pay for falling in love with someone with a brain isn't it?"

They walked for another half an hour before driving back to the village and heading to the pub for something to eat. As they stood at the bar waiting to be served, Flynn noticed Jackson's picture on the wall.

"Nice photo" he said nodding towards it "he looks really happy."

Aaron smiled. "Yeah, it's one of my favourites. They put it up yesterday."

"That was a nice gesture."

"That's what me and Hazel thought."

They took their drinks and went to sit down with Adam and Alex who had struck up an unlikely friendship over the last few weeks.

"How's the head?" Adam said to Aaron.

"Alright now, yours?"

"Yeah, not too bad considering. We were just saying, we could do with a proper night out in town. We were thinking about going on Saturday if you're up for it."

Aaron and Flynn looked at each other and smiled. "Sounds like fun. Does it include Bar West?" Aaron said.

"Of course, it does have the best pool table so you'll have no excuses when I beat you."

"Bar West, great, I haven't been there in ages" Alex said. They all looked at him waiting for him to continue.

"My cousin's gay and I used to go there with him all the time when he was single, bit of moral support, you know." Aaron and Adam looked at each other and smiled. "In fact, he met his partner there. Once they met that was it, they were inseparable so then I wasn't needed anymore. We had some of the best nights in that place."

"How old is he then, your cousin?" Aaron asked.

"Now, he's twenty three but when they met he was nineteen or twenty. Everyone said they were too young and it wouldn't last but he said he just knew he'd met the right one. They got married last year. The pair of them are so happy and loved up, it's sickening."

"What, like them two?" Adam said to Alex nodding his head towards Flynn and Aaron.

Aaron and Flynn just smiled.

"Right, are we going to have something to eat then, I'm starving" Aaron said.

They all ordered food and spent the next hour or so talking and laughing now they had something to look forward to.

Paddy came in and saw the four of them sitting round the table.

"What are they all looking so happy about?" he said to Marlon.

"Don't know, something about a big night out on Saturday."

"And they haven't asked us? We haven't been out for ages either have we?"

Marlon shook his head. "They'll never agree to us going with them" he said.

"Oh won't they? Watch and learn Marlon, watch and learn."

Paddy walked over and pulled a chair up next to Aaron.

"Alright lads. I understand there's a big night out planned for next week. Got room for two more?"

They all laughed. "What, you and Marlon, no chance" Aaron said "you wouldn't be able to keep up."

"Yeah, and whatever slim chance we might have of pulling would disappear completely if you two were with us" Adam said "They'd think we were out with our dads."

Paddy smiled. "Can I have a word Aaron, in private."

He stood up and walked away, Aaron following, a quizzical look on his face.

"After this night out of yours, where will Flynn be staying?"

"With me of course."

"Sure about that are you? I might change my mind about the whole staying over thing."

"You can't, you wouldn't, would you?"

"I might do, especially as I haven't had a decent night out in ages. It puts me in a bad mood."

"Nice try but you wouldn't do that, you're not that sort of person."

"But are you prepared to take that risk? That's what you have to ask yourself." He smiled at Aaron.

"That's blackmail."

"I know. I'll leave you to tell them the good news shall I?"

He walked over to Marlon and told him they were going out on Saturday. Aaron walked back over and sat down.

"They're coming too" he said quietly.

"You're joking" Alex said.

"Let's just say he didn't leave me any choice ok."

When they'd finished eating, Flynn and Aaron walked back to Flynn's car.

"Are you sure you don't mind going out in a group?" Aaron asked Flynn.

"No, it's fine. If we were in town, we'd probably bump into them anyway. Besides, we could do with a good night out, let our hair down. Well, those of us who have got hair to let down." He rubbed his hand over Aaron's close cropped hair. "Just don't drink so much that you fall asleep on me when we get back alright."

"Like that's going to happen after hardly seeing you for a week."

Flynn smiled. "I'll call you later alright."

They kissed goodbye both wishing the week ahead would go by as quickly as possible.

Saturday night arrived and the six of them were having a great time. They had been around a few of the pubs and were now drunk enough to be relaxed and maybe do things they wouldn't normally do if sober. For Aaron and Flynn, it had been difficult to keep their hands off each other having spent virtually all of the last week apart so the fact that they were now all outside Bar West was a welcome relief. They opened the door and walked in. The place was packed but instead of the usual dance music, they were greeted by the sound of someone murdering Frank Sinatra's My Way on the karaoke. They walked up to the bar to get some drinks.

"We could do better than that" Marlon said.

"Well it wouldn't be difficult would it?" Adam replied.

"Shall we put our names down then" Alex said.

"Yeah, come on then, why not" Paddy replied "Flynn, want us to put your name down?"

"Oh, I don't know."

"That's a yes then"

Paddy looked at Aaron. "Don't even think about it. I may have had a few but nowhere near enough to get me up there singing."

The four of them walked off leaving Aaron and Flynn alone for the first time. They moved to the end of the bar knowing it would take a bit longer to be served, buying them a bit of time on their own. They kissed each other both enjoying the feeling of the other one's mouth on theirs, of being close again. They'd missed each other and were glad to be in each other's company again. By the time the drinks were ordered, the others had come back.

"So, what are you going to be trying to sing then?" Aaron asked.

"We won't tell you the song but I'll give you a clue to the group who sang it. Where are we from?" Adam said

"Emmerdale" Aaron said, the tone of his voice saying what a stupid question it was.

They all laughed. "This is going to be harder than I thought" Adam said. "Right, Emmerdale, is it a town, a city…."

"It's a village" Aaron said.

Flynn had an idea where this was going but Aaron was still oblivious.

"Right, it's a village that has what living in it."

"People" Flynn answered helping Aaron out.

"So, put the two together." They all waited for the penny to drop. Suddenly, Aaron got it.

"You are joking aren't you? You're not seriously going to sing YMCA in here."

"It's a classic, people love it especially when they've had a few beers" Alex said.

"Besides, we can sing together then rather than on our own apart from you Flynn, we put you down separately."

"Oh cheers, thanks for that. Maybe they'll run out of time before it's my turn."

They took their drinks and headed over to the pool table which was empty, most people crowding down towards where the karaoke was. As they were standing around deciding who was going to play, a guy came up and started talking to Alex. They spoke for a few minutes before Alex said something and the guy disappeared. He shrugged his shoulders. "What can I say, you've either got it or you haven't."

About fifteen minutes later, while Marlon and Paddy were playing pool, the same thing happened with a different guy. They watched as Alex chatted quite happily to him before sending him away.

"I don't get it" Adam said "What's he got exactly?"

At the same time as Flynn said "nice eyes" Aaron said " a cheeky smile." They both looked at each other. "Been admiring the locals when I'm not around have you?" Flynn said.

"No, have you?" Aaron replied.

"You know I've only got eyes for you" Flynn said.

"Glad to hear it" Aaron replied putting his arm around Flynn's waist and holding tight.

"Oh please" Adam moaned.

Suddenly, they heard the DJ calling for the four of them to go and sing. They made their way through the crowd and took the microphones that were offered to them. Flynn and Aaron stood to one side watching. When the introduction to the song started, a big cheer went up. As they started singing, everyone joined in so you could barely hear them. Flynn started dancing, even Aaron swayed a bit from side to side. Adam, Alex, Marlon and Paddy looked like they were having a whale of a time, Aaron almost wished he was up there with them, almost. When the song finished, another big cheer went up as they made their way back over to Aaron to Flynn.

"Well, I've got to hand it to you, that was….not bad" Aaron said.

"What a laugh, that was brilliant. I want to sing another one now" Marlon said.

"I think one a night is enough but it was good fun" said Paddy "Who wants another drink?" As they all nodded, he and Alex set off to get them.

"Could be your turn next Flynn" Adam said.

"Oh yeah, I'd forgotten about that. They should be stopping soon anyway, put the dance music back on."

"You mean, you hope they're stopping soon."

Alex and Paddy came back with the drinks and they listened to the other people who went up to sing, some not bad, others terrible probably due to the amount of alcohol and the lateness of the hour.

"Right, time for the last one before the music goes back on so where's Flynn? It's your turn" said the DJ.

Flynn swallowed and handed Aaron his bottle as he made his way through the people. He stood up on the little stage and pointed at a song for the DJ to play. He hadn't really thought about what to sing but when he'd seen it in the book, he knew it was the right one. If he changed the odd word here and there, her to his or him or even your, he could make it personal. He took a deep breath and looked at the people in front of him, finding Aaron's face and focussing on it. The music started and Aaron smiled as soon as he heard it. It wasn't his type of music at all but Flynn had had it playing one day when they were in bed together and he'd quite enjoyed listening to it. Then, he heard Flynn's voice start to sing

_Your eyes, your eyes make the stars look like they're not shining_

He couldn't believe what he was hearing, Flynn could sing although he shouldn't be surprised really, he was good at most things he had a go at. From that moment, he was captivated by watching his boyfriend sing to him.

"Hey, he's pretty good, your fella" Alex said nudging Aaron but he didn't hear. Adam, Paddy and Marlon just looked at each other and smiled.

_When I see your face, there's not a thing that I would change_

_Cos you're amazing just the way you are_

_And when you smile, the whole world stops and stares for a while_

_Cos you're amazing just the way you are._

_His lips, his lips, I could kiss them all day if he'd let me…_

Aaron smiled and put his head down briefly, realising Flynn was changing some of the words to suit them. He looked back up and Flynn winked at him. When he finished, the place went mad, people cheering and whistling. He handed the microphone back, bowed and went back to Aaron and the others.

"Something else to add to that list of things you're good at" Adam said patting him on the back.

"Well done, mate, that was great" said Alex.

"Thanks, I think I've just about stopped shaking now" he said taking his drink back from Aaron.

"You never told us he could sing" Paddy said to Aaron.

"I didn't know, I mean I've heard him in the shower but everyone can sing in the shower can't they?"

"No, I still can't" Marlon said.

"Trust you to be different."

"Pool anyone?" Paddy's voice interrupted the silence that had descended on the group.

"Probably won't get on now" Marlon said. Paddy stared at him and at the other two.

"No harm in trying though, is there?" Adam said. The four of them walked away while Aaron and Flynn went to find somewhere to sit down. They put their bottles on the table as they sat close, Aaron's fingers gently stroking Flynn's leg. He turned and smiled at him.

"Well, you're a guy of hidden talents aren't you? Just when I think I know pretty much everything about you, I find out something new."

"I've got to find some way of keeping you interested. I don't want you getting bored with me now do I?"

"You know that won't ever happen." They looked into each other's eyes, the intensity of their emotions reflected there. "So, why that song or was it just a random choice?"

"No, it wasn't a random choice. I just got the feeling after Jackson's anniversary that you were feeling a bit, not insecure exactly but maybe needing some reassurance. You know how I feel about you and I'll tell you as many times as you need to hear it. That song was just a bit more of a light hearted way of telling you that you have absolutely nothing to worry about. You are amazing just the way you are."

Aaron swallowed the lump that had risen in his throat. He wanted to say something similar back to Flynn but he didn't think he could find the words for a speech like that so he did what he always did now and just tried to be honest.

"You're right. I did need some extra reassurance but I don't know why. I know how you feel about me just like you know how I feel about you. I can't see myself with anybody else. I think you're amazing, too."

Flynn pulled Aaron towards him to kiss him, to let him feel that what he had said he'd meant. Aaron hoped that Flynn could tell he had meant what he'd said too.

"Come on" Aaron said, standing up and pulling Flynn to his feet "Let's go find the others and tell them we're leaving. I think we've spent enough time with other people, it's time there was just the two of us again."


	28. Chapter 28

**A massive thank you to everyone for all your support and a special thank you to Shawn who helped me so much with this chapter. You're a star x**

Aaron and Flynn woke up the next morning, bright sunlight filtering through Aaron's curtains. They had left the others in Bar West the night before and returned to Smithy Cottage to be on their own, to make love to each other, making it last as long as possible knowing they had the place to themselves. Flynn put his arm around Aaron as Aaron lay with his head resting on Flynn's chest, his fingers continuously tracing over the outline of Flynn's tattoo. They were talking about what a good night they'd had, how funny it was to see the village's own village people singing and dancing, something Aaron was determined not to let them forget in a hurry.

"So, which one do you reckon Paddy is, the construction worker, the cowboy, he's definitely not the red Indian, that's more Adam…."

Flynn laughed. "I haven't got a clue but you know far too much about Village People for someone your age."

Aaron laughed too. "It was a good night though wasn't it?"

"Yeah, one of the best and it got even better when we got back here."

"Funnily enough, that was my favourite bit of the whole night" Aaron said as he rolled on top of Flynn, wanting to feel Flynn's body under his, his blue eyes staring intensely into Flynn's.

"Mine too" Flynn said quietly as Aaron's lips hungrily met his, both of them wanting to repeat what had happened between them the night before. They spent most of the day in bed watching DVD's, neither wanting to get up and get dressed. They only got out of bed to get something to eat and drink and even then they brought it up to bed with them. They eventually got up in the early evening so they could have a couple of pints together in the pub before Flynn had to go home.

Hazel was on her way back from visiting Jackson. She looked up the road just as Aaron and Flynn were leaving. She watched as Aaron closed the front door and jogged the couple of steps to catch up with Flynn before barging into his shoulder and running off. Flynn chased after him and caught him, pulling him into a kiss. She sighed. She was happy for Aaron, she liked Flynn but she couldn't help but wish that Jackson was still alive and with Aaron, that it was Jackson that was putting that smile on Aaron's face and Aaron doing the same to him. She turned away hoping to make it home without being seen but it was too late.

"Hazel, wait up" Aaron called. She fixed a smile on her face and turned round to face them.

"We're just going for a quick drink if you want to join us."

"No thanks, you're alright, another time maybe."

"You turned me down last time I asked too. If I didn't know you better, I'd think you'd gone off me."

"How could anyone go off you? It's just I've got some stuff to do. I'll see you soon though."

They watched as she walked quickly down the road and went home. Flynn looked at Aaron. "You're worried about her aren't you?"

Aaron nodded. "Something's not right."

"Why don't you go after her, talk to her. We can go for a drink another time."

"Are you sure you don't mind?"

"Course I don't. Go on, I'll talk to you tomorrow." Aaron kissed him quickly and smiled gratefully at him. "You're the best, you know that don't you?"

Flynn just smiled and walked back up the road to catch the bus home while Aaron set off after Hazel. He knocked on the door and waited for Hazel to open it which she did with a look of surprise on her face when she saw Aaron. "What are you doing here? I thought you were going for a drink with Flynn."

"Change of plan. So, are you going to let me in or just leave me here on the doorstep all night?"

"Sorry, yeah, course, come in."

Aaron went in and sat down on the sofa. Hazel sat down near him and smiled. "Can I get you anything, drink, something to eat?"

"No, you're alright thanks. What you can do though is tell me what's wrong."

"What's wrong, there's nothing wrong."

"Come on Hazel, I know you too well by now. You're as bad a liar as I am so what's the matter? You can tell me."

Hazel put her head down and took a deep breath. She looked at Aaron, at his concerned face staring back at her. She knew what she was about to say would hurt him and she hated herself for it.

"There's no easy way to say this so I'm just going to come straight out with it. I'm leaving the village."

Her words hung in the air between them. Aaron had heard them but they didn't register, not straight away. When they did, he felt like he'd been hit with a sledgehammer.

"But you can't leave, this is your home, why would you want to go anywhere else?"

"Because I'm not coping Aaron. I've given it over a year and it's not getting any better. Everywhere I go, there are reminders of Jackson and it's just too painful for me."

"But it'll get better, it will. I thought like you but it got better for me and it will for you too."

"No, it won't, love. I've tried and I can't do it. There's nothing here for me anymore."

"What about Jackson? He's here" Aaron said, tears starting to flow down his cheeks.

Hazel shook her head, tears falling down her cheeks too. "No, he isn't. My Jackson's been gone a long time. Besides, he wouldn't want me to stay here being miserable. He hated the thought of me being tied down to one place, you know that. He'd want me to move on and that's what I'm going to try to do just not here."

"But I need you" Aaron said, his voice breaking up as he spoke "please, don't leave me. You're the closest thing to Jackson that I've got left."

Hazel got up and sat down next to Aaron, holding him tightly as he sobbed.

"You don't need me, Aaron, you've got your mum and Paddy and Flynn now. He's a good lad, he loves you very much and he'll do anything to make you happy. You've moved on and that's great. Now, you've got to let me try to do the same."

"But why can't you do that here, with me and your friends to help, that's what I don't understand." Aaron looked at her, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. "Have I done something?"

"No, course you haven't. You're like a son to me and I want what's best for you but what's best for you is too difficult for me to see right now, do you understand?"

"You mean me being with Flynn don't you?"

"I'm happy for you, I genuinely am, that you're happy again and you've got someone who loves you like you deserve to be loved but it's hard for me too."

"So, if I wasn't with Flynn you'd stay."

"No, I wouldn't, it's not that simple."

Aaron felt numb. He sat quietly for a few minutes before continuing. "So, where are you going?"

"There's a friend of mine who owns a bar in Portugal. She wants me to go out and help her to run it. It might be just what I need, a change of scenery, something new to focus on."

"So I won't even be able to keep in touch with you" Aaron said.

"Yes you will, I've thought of that. I'll get one of those web cam thingies so we can still talk face to face."

"You and computers are a nightmare, that'll never work."

"I'll make it work. You're too special to me to risk not staying in touch."

"So, when are you going?"

"Friday morning. I know it's only five days away but now my mind's made up, there's no point in hanging about."

Aaron sat for ages trying to take in what he'd been told, Hazel leaving him to his thoughts. He knew he didn't see Hazel as often as he used to but it was a comfort to know she was there close by. What would he do when she wasn't there anymore? Suddenly, he had to get out. There was only one place he wanted to be and only one person he wanted to be with. He told Hazel he had to go and phoned a taxi to take him to Flynn's.

It was late when he got there but he never gave a thought to the time. He knocked on the door, eyes on the floor. The door opened and Aaron looked up into the face of Flynn's dad.

"Is Flynn here, I really need to see him" he said.

Flynn's dad was shocked by Aaron's appearance. He had obviously been crying a lot and his heart went out to him. "Course he is, come in." He ushered Aaron in to the house where Flynn's mum was standing wondering who was knocking at their door. "Can you go and get Flynn?" he said, as he tried to lead Aaron into the living room but Aaron's legs didn't seem to want to work. A couple of minutes later, Flynn came running downstairs wearing a pair of jogging bottoms and nothing else. "Aaron, what's happened, what is it?" he said. Aaron walked towards him and threw his arms around him, starting to cry again. Flynn put his arms around Aaron, making soothing noises, holding him, letting him cry. Flynn's mum and dad went upstairs and left them to it. Flynn didn't know how long they stood there or how long Aaron cried for. His shoulder was wet from all of Aaron's tears and his ankle ached from standing in one position too long but he was not going to move until Aaron was ready.

He pulled back slightly as Aaron looked at him. "Are you ready to talk me yet?" he said. Aaron nodded so Flynn led him into the living room and sat him down on the sofa. He waited for Aaron to speak, his heart pounding as he waited to hear what had put his boyfriend in such a state. Aaron told Flynn exactly what Hazel had said including how difficult she found it seeing them together. Flynn never said a word, just listened as Aaron got it all off his chest.

"I'm sorry babe, I really am. I don't know what else I can say."

"There isn't anything you can say. I just feel so guilty, like this is my fault."

"Hang on a minute Aaron, how can this be your fault? What happened to Jackson was an accident, him getting ill and dying was just one of those terrible things that no one had control over, you can't blame yourself, it's not right."

"But what about me and you, I made that decision didn't I?"

Flynn felt sick. His voice went quiet as he said "So, what are you saying, that you regret it, that you don't want to be with me anymore, that you'd rather be on your own again."

Aaron looked at him as if he'd said the stupidest thing ever. "No, absolutely not. I can't be without you, you're everything to me. I love you so much and I know I won't ever want anyone else. It's just hard knowing that what makes me so happy hurts her so much."

"I know, it can't be easy for her" Flynn said. He took Aaron's hand in his and looked him straight in the eyes. "I know you probably won't want to hear this but maybe it's for the best. If moving away is the only way she can cope, then she has to do it. It's only Portugal, it's a few hours away. You can go and visit and use the webcam to keep in touch."

"But it feels like I'm losing her. I lost Jackson, how long til I lose you too?"

Flynn shook his head. "Aaron, you're not going to lose me. The only way I won't be with you is if you tell me you don't want to be with me anymore. Look, I know how I feel and what I want. In ten, twenty, fifty years time, I'll still feel the same and want the same thing. I'll still love you and still want to be with you. Don't ask me how I know because I can't tell you, I just know." Aaron looked at Flynn, the expression on his face confirming the words he'd just spoken. He knew exactly what Flynn meant because he felt the same way, he just knew too. Aaron leant towards him and kissed him. He'd never felt so much love for Flynn as he did at that moment. "Thank you" he said.

"Don't be silly. Do you want a drink or anything?"

"No, I better be getting back."

"No, not tonight. You're staying with me."

"But what about your mum and dad?"

"Don't worry about them. Come on" he said holding out his hand to pull Aaron up off the sofa.

They went upstairs in silence and into Flynn's room. Flynn went to the bathroom leaving Aaron to get undressed. By the time he came back, Aaron was already in bed. He closed the door behind him, took off his jogging bottoms and got into bed, leaving his boxers on. He wanted Aaron to know he wasn't expecting anything from him. In the dark, Aaron snuggled up against him. Flynn was surprised to feel that Aaron was naked. He put his arm around him and shut his eyes waiting to go to sleep. Aaron was tired but he was thinking about everything that Hazel had said, everything they'd said to each other and his mind was far too alert to allow him to sleep. He thought about him and Flynn, how right everything felt between them and realised that he shouldn't feel guilty for being with him even if Hazel was finding it difficult. He'd made his peace with the most important person, Jackson, and that should be all that mattered. His eyes had adjusted to the dark so he easily found Flynn's mouth and kissed him, a long, slow tender kiss that Flynn eagerly returned. He opened his eyes to look at Aaron. "What was that for, not that I'm complaining."

"Because I wanted to and because I can" Aaron said. He'd never wanted Flynn as much as he wanted him now. Words were one thing but he needed to feel how much Flynn loved him, wanted to show Flynn how much he loved him too. He kissed him again, more passionately this time, his tongue darting into Flynn's mouth, finding Flynn's tongue and battling with it.

"I thought you were tired" Flynn said grinning.

"I am but I need you right now more than I need sleep."

Flynn wanted Aaron as much as Aaron wanted him but his mum and dad were only across the landing. Aaron's hand was caressing his chest, looking for the spot where Flynn was extra sensitive. He found it quickly, Flynn letting him know he'd found it by moaning quietly. Aaron smiled, he had him, there was no way Flynn was going to refuse now and he was right. Flynn's mouth was on his and his hands were all over him before Aaron knew what had hit him. Flynn shifted his weight so Aaron could remove his boxers before kissing him again. They were both aware of where they were but the need to show the other one how much they were loved was too great to ignore. When they eventually fell asleep some time later, neither was left in any doubt just how much the other one loved them.


	29. Chapter 29

**All these characters still belong to Emmerdale, not me unfortunately.**

Flynn woke up first and just lay there thinking about the previous night. He was worried about Aaron and there was the small matter of telling his parents that Aaron had stayed the night and not in the spare room either. He turned to look at Aaron sleeping next to him, his face a picture of serenity, so different to how he had looked when he had arrived last night. He smiled and watched him sleep for a few minutes. He could quite easily have watched him all day but he knew he had to face his parents sooner or later so he thought he'd get it over with. He eased himself out of bed leaving Aaron undisturbed, got dressed and went downstairs. His parents were in the kitchen talking but stopped when they saw him. He poured himself a glass of orange juice and sat down with them. "How are you this morning?" his mum said smiling at him.

"I'm ok. I er I need to tell you both something. Aaron stayed here last night. I couldn't let him go home, not in the state he was in."

"I should think not either. If you had have let him go home in that state, you'd have had me to answer to" said his dad. "That's what the spare room is for."

Flynn looked at his dad. "He didn't sleep in the spare room. He slept in my room with me. He really needed me last night and I wasn't going to let him down and leave him on his own." Flynn's mum and dad looked at each other but said nothing. "Anyway, I better go and check on him." He finished his orange juice and went back upstairs.

"Don't be angry with him" Flynn's mum said.

"I'm not angry with him, I'm really proud of him. He did what he thought was right for Aaron, how can I be angry at that? Besides, I overheard them talking last night. I didn't mean to, I came down for a glass of water and the door was ajar. Did you know that Aaron's last boyfriend died?"

"No, I had no idea. Poor lad, what a thing to go through at his age."

"I know. I had no idea he and Flynn were so serious about each other until last night." Flynn's mum smiled. "You men, honestly, unless you have it spelt out for you, you never see what's right in front of your nose, do you?" Flynn's dad looked at her with tears in his eyes. "He's not my little boy anymore, is he?"

She shook her head and hugged him. "He hasn't been your little boy for a while."

"Then maybe it's time I stopped treating him like one."

Upstairs, Aaron was just waking up wondering where Flynn had got to. He didn't have to wonder for long. The door opened and Flynn came in, a smile breaking out on his face when he saw that Aaron was awake. "Hey, how are you feeling this morning?"

"Not too bad. I'd feel better after a hug though." Flynn walked over and sat on the bed so he could hold Aaron, loving the feeling of Aaron's arms around him holding him tightly. They kissed each other, a warm gentle kiss to start the day. Aaron snuggled up against Flynn not wanting to let him go, neither saying anything, just enjoying lying together. Eventually, Aaron spoke.

"So, have you seen your parents this morning?" he said quietly.

"Yeah, I have, they're downstairs. Don't worry, I've spoken to them, told them about you staying the night with me in here and they're fine about it."

"Really?"

"Yes, really. They think you stayed here because I didn't want you to go home in a state which was true until you got other ideas."

"Well you didn't exactly put up much resistance did you?"

Flynn pulled back a bit. "Are you saying that I'm easy?"

"No, just that I know which buttons to push, that's all" Aaron said grinning.

"Yeah, don't you just" Flynn replied. He kissed Aaron again, letting his hand wander over Aaron's back and down his side. Just as he got to Aaron's waist, he moved his hand back slightly and felt Aaron shiver, heard him moan. He took his hand away and whispered "See, I know which buttons to push too." He stood up and went to sort his hair out.

"You git, that was cruel."

"Just proving a point. Come on, get dressed and we'll go get some breakfast."

"I can't right now thanks to you proving your point." They smiled at each other enjoying this unexpected period of togetherness. A few minutes later, Aaron was dressed and they headed towards the door.

"Ready for this" Flynn said.

"No, not really but it's got to be done hasn't it?"

Flynn pulled Aaron to him and hugged him.

"I told you, they're fine. Come on" They went downstairs together.

"Morning lads" said Flynn's dad. "How are you this morning, Aaron?"

Aaron cleared his throat. "I'm ok thanks. I'm sorry about last night, just turning up like that when it was so late. I didn't realise what the time was."

"No need for an apology. You're welcome here anytime, I mean that. I'm just glad you're feeling better. You gave me a bit of a shock when I saw you. Anyway, I'm off to work. See you later."

"Told you he liked you" Flynn said just loud enough for Aaron to hear. Aaron smiled at him as Flynn's mum busied herself getting them something to eat.

By the time Aaron got back to the village, word had started to filter through about Hazel leaving and by the time he left work that afternoon, everyone knew. Bob was on his way out of Hazel's and called out to Aaron. "Bit of a shock about Hazel isn't it? I didn't see that coming."

"No, me either. How is she?"

"Ok, I think. She's sure she's doing what's right which is the main thing. I've managed to get her to agree to a few drinks in the pub on Thursday. She didn't want a fuss but we can't let her go without saying goodbye properly can we? So , how are you?" Aaron just shook his head. "I know how you feel, I'm going to miss her too."

"Look, I've got to go, see you later" Aaron said as he walked off, hands in his pockets looking every inch the troubled teen he'd used to be. When Flynn knocked on the door of Smithy Cottage some time later, he was told by Paddy that Aaron wasn't back from work yet. Paddy made them a cup of tea and they chatted quite happily but when they had finished, there was still no sign of Aaron. Paddy phoned him but it went straight to voicemail. "He's not answering, I don't know what's going on." Flynn stood up. "I think I know where he'll be. Thanks for the tea, see you later." He walked down the road towards the small cemetery and made his way to Jackson's grave. He smiled when he saw Aaron sitting there. He walked over and sat down on the grass next to him, saying nothing, waiting for Aaron to talk if he wanted to.

"I've been telling Jackson about his mum. I've apologised for letting him down, for not being able to look after her like I promised him I would."

"You haven't let him down Aaron. If she's made her mind up to move away, that's not your fault. Besides, I'm sure Jackson knows better than anyone what his mum is like, he'll understand."

Aaron smiled. "Yeah, you're right. You should have seen her when I first met her. Me and Jackson met her in some bar, she'd just come back from her travels. She came in larger than life, talking loudly. She embarrassed Jackson by having a go at one of his exes and then said if she was younger and I wasn't gay, she could quite fancy me and that was all in the space of a few minutes. She even came to Bar West with us one Christmas after Jackson's accident and made him sing karaoke with her."

Flynn smiled at him. "Doesn't sound like the Hazel that I know, it sounds like you're talking about a completely different person."

"I know, she's changed so much. I just didn't realise how much until now."

Flynn took a deep breath and looked at Aaron. "That's why she has to move away, to try and become that Hazel again. Just try to put yourself in her shoes. She knows how different she is, how unhappy she is. She doesn't want to hurt you babe but she has to do this and she needs you to tell her you understand and that you're ok with it even if you're not." Aaron nodded and smiled at Flynn. "Fancy taking me for a pint?"

Flynn stood up and held out his hand to pull Aaron up. "I'll buy you a pint after you talk to Hazel, alright."

"Alright" Aaron said. They walked away together before separating, Flynn going to the pub, Aaron on his way to see Hazel.

Flynn bought himself a pint and went to sit down. He hoped Aaron and Hazel could sort things out before she went. They'd been through so much, it would be a shame if she left with things unsaid between them. Paddy came in, bought his drink and joined him.

"Did you find him?"

"Yeah, he was with Jackson talking about Hazel." Paddy smiled. "I should have guessed. Is he ok?"

"I think so. He's gone to talk to her, let her know he understands why she has to leave, that it's the right thing for her."

"Why does something tell me he had a bit of help reaching that conclusion" Paddy said grinning.

"I have no idea what you're talking about" Flynn said smiling. They carried on chatting until Aaron joined them an hour later.

"How did it go?" Flynn said.

"Alright actually. We had a chat, a proper chat and yeah, she seemed a lot happier when I left."

"What about you?" Paddy said.

"Me, I'm ok, I've got you two haven't I? So, where's that pint you promised me" he said looking at Flynn.

"On it's way" Flynn said, kissing him briefly as he stood up. "I'm really proud of you." Aaron blushed and smiled at him. He looked at Paddy who was also smiling at him. "What?" he said.

"Nothing, it's just you two. You're so right for each other. I'm glad you've got him."

"Yeah, so am I."

Hazel felt so much better after Aaron had gone. They had spoken non stop for the whole time he'd been there. They'd laughed about their first meeting and went over all sorts of memories, mostly happy ones and ones where she'd embarrassed Aaron or wound him up. She couldn't remember the last time she'd laughed so much. It meant a lot to her to know that Aaron understood why she had to leave, even if he wasn't very happy about it. It meant she could enjoy her final days in the village before setting off to her new life.

On the Thursday evening, Bob came to collect Hazel to accompany her to the pub. They spent a few minutes on their own, shed a few tears. Apart from Aaron, he was probably the person she was closest to and they would miss each other. Hazel promised herself no more tears, she was going to try to enjoy this last night and leave with some good memories. The pub was full when they arrived but she couldn't see Aaron anywhere. A couple of minutes later, the door opened and Paddy and Aaron came in. Hazel went straight over. "Aren't you missing someone? Flynn, where is he?" She looked straight at Aaron.

"Oh, he's not feeling well, some sort of bug. He said to wish you all the best and he hopes things work out for you. Paddy, get us a pint will you, I'll be back in a minute."

Paddy went to walk away but Hazel stopped him. "Oh no you don't. Do I look like I was born yesterday? Not feeling well, my foot. What's really going on Paddy and I want the truth."

Paddy looked uncomfortable. "He's back at my place. Aaron and him decided it would be best if he stayed away. They didn't want to upset you, not on your last night." Hazel shook her head. "No, I'm not having this" she said. She left the pub and went up to Paddy's. She knocked on the door and Flynn opened it, a shocked look on his face when he saw her. "Can I come in?" she said. "Course" he replied, standing aside to let her in. He followed her into the kitchen and smiled shyly at her.

"What are you doing here? I don't want this" she said.

"We just didn't want to make things harder for you than they're already going to be. I know it's difficult for you seeing me and Aaron together."

"Yeah but it's harder seeing him miserable which is what he's going to be if you stay here all night. Look, I owe you an apology. I was being selfish. I should never have said what I said to Aaron about you two. The weird thing is I genuinely like you."

"Hazel, you don't owe me anything, I understand."

"I know you do but that doesn't make it right. So, will you come and have a drink with me, please, it would mean a lot." Flynn smiled at her. "I'd love to. Just give me a couple of minutes ok" he said as he disappeared upstairs. Just as they got to the door to leave, Hazel stopped him. "You will look after him for me, won't you?"

"You know I will. He means the world to me."

"I know, and he feels the same about you. So, let's go get this drink then shall we?"

They walked into the pub together and up to the bar. Aaron saw them and went over.

"What's going on?" he said.

"He's made a miraculous recovery. What were you thinking of, honestly."

Aaron looked embarrassed. Hazel kissed him on the cheek. "I know you thought you were doing the right thing and I appreciate it but you shouldn't have. He's too nice to be shut away somewhere. Now, where's my drink?"

Aaron looked at Flynn. "What happened?"

"I'll tell you later. So, are you buying me a drink then?"

"Course I will." Aaron kissed him quickly.

The evening went well, lots of people wishing Hazel good luck, saying how they'd miss her. Hazel and Aaron were sitting at a table while Flynn was getting the drinks.

"So what time are you leaving tomorrow morning?" Aaron said.

"The taxi's coming at six."

"Taxi? Isn't someone giving you a lift?"

"No, Bob offered but I don't want a big scene. A taxi will be fine."

"No, no way are you going to the airport on your own. I'm coming with you."

"No, you're not."

"Hazel, the least I can do is make sure you get away safely. So, it doesn't matter what you say, I'm coming with you."

She smiled at him. "Ok, love. Thanks."

Later that night, Aaron and Flynn were walking up the road back to Flynn's car. Flynn had told him what Hazel had said when she went to talk to him earlier. Aaron was ok but a bit quiet. Flynn looked at him. "Hey, you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm going to the airport with Hazel tomorrow, the taxi's coming at six. Her flight leaves around nine."

"Oh, right. How will you get back?" Aaron shrugged. "Taxi, I suppose."

"It'll cost a fortune. Why don't I pick you up?"

"Cos you'll be in college."

"It won't hurt if I miss one day, besides I can text Nick and he can let me know if I miss anything important."

"No, you're alright, I'll be fine."

"Look, you don't want Hazel to be on her own tomorrow, well I don't want you to be on your own either so I'm picking you up whether you like it or not."

"Doesn't sound like I've got a choice, does it?" Aaron said, secretly pleased.

"No, you haven't."

"Will you stay with me tonight? I know you were going to go home but I'd really like you to stay."

Flynn hugged him. "Course I will. Come on."

They went home and straight up to bed. Aaron cuddled up to Flynn, just needing to be close to him. "Flynn" he said "Do you mind…" He got no further, Flynn silenced him with a kiss. "Sshh, you don't have to say anything, it's fine. See you in the morning."

Aaron and Hazel walked through the relatively quiet airport heading towards the check in. They'd decided to check in first, then go for a cup of coffee together before Hazel went through to the departure lounge. They'd been quite quiet in the taxi, both aware of how emotional they were feeling. They checked in Hazel's luggage and went to grab a coffee. As they sat down, Aaron's phone rang. It was Flynn just letting him know he was about half an hour away. He said he'd phone back once he'd parked the car. Hazel and Aaron talked about anything and everything to keep their minds off having to say that final goodbye. They drank their coffee and ate some breakfast but they knew they couldn't put it off forever so they headed towards the departure lounge. Just as they got there, Aaron's phone rang again. Flynn wanted to know where they were so Aaron told him.

"I'm glad you're not going to be leaving here on your own" Hazel said. Aaron smiled at her. "No chance, not with Flynn around." They stood awkwardly, neither wanting to make that first contact. "Oh, come here" Hazel said as she pulled Aaron into a hug. Aaron held her tightly, the tears he'd been fighting to hold back falling freely now as were Hazels.

"You're a very special person Aaron. I'll never forget what you did for Jackson, staying with him after the accident and looking after him and what you did for me too."

"I did what I did because I loved him. His disability, the wheelchair, none of that mattered to me. He was still my Jackson, that was all I cared about."

"I know but plenty of others would have walked."

"Not if they really loved that person they wouldn't. I still wish you weren't going."

"I know but we can talk on the phone and, once I've got the hang of that webcam thingie, I'll even be able to see your ugly mug while we're talking." Aaron smiled at her through his tears. She smiled back at him.

"Look, I have to do this Aaron. My future is through them doors somewhere, yours is standing a few feet behind you looking just a little bit uncomfortable."

Aaron turned his head to see Flynn standing at a safe distance, not wanting to intrude. He smiled a shy smile at Aaron who smiled back. He turned to face Hazel again.

"He's a good lad Aaron, a really nice person. I knew it that day at Jackson's grave…" she stopped mid sentence realising what she'd said.

"What day at Jackson's grave? What are you talking about?"

Hazel could have kicked herself. "Me and my big mouth. I promised him I wouldn't say anything, that I wouldn't tell you."

"Tell me what?"

Hazel took a deep breath. "I went to see Jackson one day and Flynn was there talking to him. He was telling him that he didn't need to worry about you anymore, that he'd take care of you and that Jackson could rest peacefully. I overheard him and we had a bit of a chat. He didn't know how you'd feel about it so he asked me not to tell you."

Aaron's eyes filled with tears as he started to cry again.

"I'm sorry, I wish I hadn't said anything."

"It's fine, I just can't believe he'd do something so thoughtful like that."

"Well, he did but I won't embarrass you or him by repeating the rest of what he said."

"What, there was more?"

"Oh yes, maybe he'll tell you one day if you want to know and if I don't get an invitation to the wedding, you'll be in trouble."

Aaron laughed. "Wedding, we're nineteen, we're too young for all that."

"Age doesn't matter if you've found the right person, Aaron. If we've learnt anything from what happened to Jackson, it's that life's too short, you never know what's around the corner. Hey, you could even come to Portugal for your honeymoon."

"I really think you're getting way ahead of yourself, Hazel."

"Well, we'll see. When you're saying I do, I'll be saying I told you so. Anyway, I best be going, can't put it off forever. I'll phone you tonight, let you know I got there in one piece." Aaron nodded.

They hugged each other again before Aaron's last living link to Jackson walked away from him for the last time. He watched her go through the doors before turning and making his way over to Flynn. He put his arms around him and hugged him.

"Can you take me somewhere, I don't care where as long as it's not the village and there's just me and you."

"No problem, I know just the place."


	30. Chapter 30

Flynn was in his room finishing off his college work. He wanted to get it done quickly because he was seeing Aaron later and the sooner he got it done, the sooner he could be with him. Hazel had been gone a week now and things were settling down. Aaron and Hazel had spoken a couple of times and both of them seemed happier with how things were going. Hazel had promised to get her friend to help her sort out a web cam so they would soon be able to talk face to face. Flynn was convinced that once Aaron could actually see Hazel, and see that she was ok, he would finally completely relax. He was interrupted by a knock on his door. He looked up to see his dad standing there. "Have you got a minute?" he said.

"Sure, what's up?" Flynn replied putting his laptop down.

Flynn's dad sat on the bed and looked at his son. "Nothing's up, I just wanted to have a chat with you."

Flynn sighed. "This is about Aaron staying the other night isn't it?"

"Yes and no" his dad said smiling. "You've been together a long time now, haven't you?"

"Almost a year."

"So, this is serious then" he said knowing what the answer would be having overheard some of Aaron and Flynn's conversation that night.

"Yeah, it is. Why?"

"Well, me and your mum have been talking. We know when we go away Aaron stays here and obviously, he's not sleeping in the spare room." Flynn could feel himself blushing. "What we wanted to say was that you don't have to wait for us not to be here for Aaron to stay."

Flynn looked at his dad. "I don't understand, you never let Harrison have any of his girlfriends stay overnight so why let Aaron stay with me?"

"Maybe we should have done, maybe we should have done things differently. It's difficult seeing your children grow up. One minute I'm taking you to school and playing football with you in the garden, the next, you've grown up and turned into an adult before I've even noticed. Maybe it's time I started treating you like one. We trust you." Flynn put his arms around his dad and hugged him. "I don't know what to say. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Now get that work done." He got up off the bed and walked towards the door.

"Dad" Flynn called. He turned around. "If you ever want that game of football, you just say so. We could even stick Aaron in goal." His dad laughed. "I might just take you up on that one day." Flynn went back to his work, wanting to get it finished. He couldn't wait to tell Aaron what his dad had said. He'd finally got what he wished for, the chance to have Aaron stay overnight with him at his place whether his parents were there or not.

When he arrived at Aaron's later that evening, he was still smiling. He knocked on the door and waited. Aaron opened the door with a big smile on his face and stood back to let him in. He closed the door behind him and kissed him.

"Well, someone looks very pleased with themselves tonight don't they?" he said.

"I thought I always looked this happy when I see you."

" Well there's happy and there's the way you're grinning right now. So, come on then, don't keep me in suspense, what's happened?"

Flynn told Aaron what his dad had said to him. "Wow, that was unexpected. Maybe you were right when you said that he liked me."

"I know. When I said to you it would be nice if you could stay overnight at my place even with my parents there, I never thought it would actually happen."

"Well, looks like it can happen now. So, when do you want me to stay?"

"Oh, I don't know, how about tonight or is that a bit too quick do you think?"

Aaron laughed. "Let's give them a few days to get used to the idea properly. Don't want to seem too keen, do we?" He grabbed a couple of beers from the fridge and handed one to Flynn. "Come on, I'm in such a good mood I might even let you beat me at that football game you've never won yet."

"You're all heart" Flynn said kissing Aaron as he walked past him into the other room. They played for an hour or so before they decided they'd had enough so they put on a DVD and snuggled up on the sofa instead.

"Can you believe in a few weeks time, we'll have been seeing each other for a year?" Flynn said.

"I know although it depends when we're counting from. If we're counting from when we met again that night in Bar West, then it's a year in a few weeks. If we count from when we first kissed each other, that was a couple of weeks later." Flynn looked at Aaron with a look of surprise on his face."Aawww, how cute are you remembering?" Aaron blushed slightly and moved his head back so he could look at Flynn. "As if I'd forget, idiot."

Flynn smiled. "Imagine if we were counting from when we first slept together. It'd only be a few months."

"Yeah but we're making up for all that lost time now aren't we?" Aaron said as he pulled Flynn towards him, meeting his mouth with his own. Their hands started to wander as their kisses became more intense. Just as things were getting interesting, they heard the door open and Paddy's voice shout "Hi honey, I'm home." Aaron and Flynn shook their heads and smiled at each other. "In here, Paddy" Aaron shouted as they sorted themselves out. Paddy came in and smiled at them both. "I thought I'd shout in case a very loud cough didn't do the trick. So have you eaten cos I'm starving, I was going to phone for a takeaway."

"Sounds good."

"Great, what do you fancy, Chinese, Indian, pizza"

"Surprise us, it's been a night of those so far." Aaron and Flynn smiled at each other.

Paddy looked confused. "Right, I'll go and order then."

Aaron turned to Flynn. "We should do something to celebrate, you know, us being together a year."

"Yeah, we will. We'll sort something out" Flynn said.

"It's a shame we can't get that cottage we went to before, that'd be wicked."

"How d'you know we can't get it?"

Aaron looked shyly at Flynn. "Because I tried on the off chance but it's booked up til the end of July. I should have thought of it sooner."

Flynn smiled at his boyfriend. He didn't think it was possible for him to love Aaron anymore than he did but looking at Aaron now, knowing Aaron had tried to do that for them proved him wrong. "Never mind, we'll go back another time. Why don't we just go out somewhere for a nice meal and take it from there."

"Yeah we could but everywhere in town is sort of normal. I wanted something special."

"Ok, what about that new spa hotel, you know the one I mean, that's meant to have a great restaurant. It's out of the way but it's not cheap and there's a dress code. No jeans. We'd have to wear a suit."

"I can wear a suit but only cos it's a special occasion and surely it doesn't matter what it costs as long as we enjoy ourselves."

"Right, pass us the phone book then, I'll book a table." He found the number and booked a table for two for three weeks on Saturday.

It was the evening of their first anniversary and Aaron came downstairs to wait for Flynn. He was dressed in a suit and was feeling excited, really looking forward to the night ahead. He'd just spoken to Hazel. She sounded more like her old self and looked happier than she had done in a long while. It made him feel a lot better. Paddy looked up as he came into the kitchen. "Well, look at you, you handsome devil. I could almost fancy you myself."

"Yeah well I'm way out of your league and spoken for so hands off" Aaron said as he sat down to put his shoes on.

"Seriously, you look great. Flynn'll be blown away. What time's he getting here?"

Aaron smiled at him. "He should be here in a little while and then the taxi should arrive at seven."

About ten minutes later Flynn arrived, suited and booted like Aaron was. Neither could believe how good the other one looked. They hadn't been anywhere before that needed them to dress so smartly so seeing each other like this was a first. Flynn left his car keys with Paddy who put them somewhere safe. "I hope you two have a great time. If anyone deserves it, you two do." He left them alone to wait for the taxi. They smiled at each other.

"You look amazing" Flynn said.

"So do you." They kissed each other slowly and tenderly.

"God I'm nervous" Flynn said.

"What are you nervous for, it's not like this is a first date. You can relax, you've got me."

"I know. I just want everything to be perfect, that's all."

"And it will be now stop worrying." Aaron kissed him briefly again. They heard a car pull up outside followed by a knock on the door.

"That'll be the taxi. Ready?" Flynn nodded. "Let's go then."

They arrived at the restaurant with a few minutes to spare and were shown to their table. Once they'd been there a few minutes and had something to drink, they both started to relax. They ordered their food and chatted away until it arrived. They never ran out of things to say to each other which still surprised them both. The food was fantastic, the wine was going down nicely and both of them were enjoying themselves.

"Do you remember the very first time we met, that night you were in Bar West with Adam?"

Aaron smiled at Flynn. "Oh yes, the night of your classic winner stays on line. Very smooth."

"It wasn't a line, I just fancied a game of pool and you just happened to be on the table at the time, that's all."

"Yeah, right."

Flynn smiled shyly at Aaron. "Well it could have been worse. At least it wasn't do you come here often. Besides, it worked didn't it, I left with your number."

"Not because of what you said, div, because I thought you were fit."

Flynn looked at Aaron, surprised at what he'd just heard. "Did you?"

"Yes, I liked you right from that first meeting even if you were wearing some dodgy cardigan thing."

"Please tell me I'm not being given fashion advice by you."

They both laughed. "So, what did you think of me?" Aaron asked.

"Ooh, you don't want to know."

"Why, is it bad?" Aaron said looking concerned now.

Flynn smiled at him. "Course it's not. I thought you were fit too and once you'd looked at me with those blue eyes of yours, that was it. I was hooked." They smiled at each other. "Who'd have thought me putting that quid on the pool table would have led to this?"

Aaron put his hand on Flynn's. "I know. It took us a while but we got there, didn't we?"

"Yeah, we did."

They enjoyed the rest of their meal both completely relaxed now enjoying being in each other's company as they always did. After they'd eaten their desserts, they asked for the bill and paid.

"That was great. So, fancy going somewhere else or do you want to go back home?" Aaron said.

"Neither" Flynn replied taking a white plastic card out of his pocket and putting it on the table.

"What's that?"

"The key to our room here." Aaron's chin nearly hit the table. He looked at Flynn, a complete look of shock on his face.

"I booked it the day after we booked the table. Tomorrow, if we want, we can go for a swim, have a massage, whatever you want before we go home."

"But how can we, we've got nothing with us and I'm not swimming in my boxers."

"You don't have to, I packed some stuff for both of us and brought it over this afternoon. It's in the room."

Aaron was speechless. He hadn't expected this at all. Suddenly, he had a thought. "Did you say you brought some stuff over this afternoon?" he said. Flynn nodded.

"Now it makes sense. That's why Paddy was so keen to take me for a coffee. I wondered why he wouldn't take no for an answer. He had to get me out of the house didn't he?"

"It was the only way I could get your stuff without you realising."

Aaron shook his head. "You are incredible, do you know that?"

Flynn smiled shyly at him. "So, want to go check out the room?"

"What do you think?"

They left the table and went up to their room. It was huge with a massive bed and a balcony overlooking a golf course. There was a bag on the floor containing the stuff that Flynn had packed for them and an I-pod and speakers on one of the bedside tables. "Is that mine?" Aaron asked. "Yeah, mines not working properly so I grabbed yours. You know I don't really like silence." At the opposite end of the room to the balcony was a table and a couple of chairs and on the table was a bottle of champagne and two glasses. "Champagne?" Aaron said throwing his jacket and tie on the bed, opening his top button.

"I don't know where that's come from" Flynn said walking over, removing his jacket and tie as he did so. There was a little card on the table next to it saying with compliments from the manager on your anniversary. "Here, have a look" he said passing the card to Aaron.

"Aah, that's nice but how did they know?"

"Must have been from that card they gave me to fill in when I checked in this afternoon. It said purpose of visit so I put anniversary." Aaron put his arms around Flynn and hugged him. "You are amazing. I can't believe you did this."

"I just wanted it to be special."

"It must have cost a fortune."

"So, you're worth it."

"Do you know how much I love you?"

"About as much as I love you." They kissed each other, tenderly at first, building in intensity as the seconds passed. Neither wanted to break the kiss but they knew they had to.

"Shame we ate so much or we could be trying out that bed right now."

"Well, we've got all night so there's no rush. Why don't we take that free champagne and sit on the balcony and relax for a while."

"Sounds good" Flynn said.

They sat outside in the mild night air, enjoying the peace and quiet and the fact that they were on their own away from everyone and everything. Aaron looked over at Flynn when he thought he wouldn't notice and smiled to himself, still not quite believing just how thoughtful he had been. Flynn caught him looking and smiled at him.

"Are you going to keep watching me all night or just some of it?"

"Don't know, haven't decided." Aaron refilled their glasses and handed Flynn's back to him. "To us, and hopefully many more happy years together."

"I'll second that" Flynn said. "So, are you enjoying yourself?"

"So far, it's been perfect. I can't think of anything that could make it better, apart from the obvious, of course. How about you?"

"Well, I can think of something that would make it even better, well, it would make it better for me anyway." Flynn looked slightly embarrassed, Aaron was intrigued. "So, what is it then?"

"If you'd dance with me. I know you probably think it's stupid but I sometimes look at the people in Bar West at the end of the night completely wrapped up in their own little worlds and wish it could be me and you."

Aaron looked at him. "How come you've never said anything before?"

"Well, you don't like dancing. Besides, in the grand scheme of things, it's really not that important is it? I can survive without a slow dance with you."

Despite what Flynn said, it obviously did mean something to him. For some reason Aaron didn't understand, it was important to him. He stood up and held his hand out to Flynn. "Come on then, I'll dance with you. We'll try it out here and if I don't make a complete prat of myself, we can unleash it on the general public next time we're in Bar West."

"Are you sure?" Flynn said taking Aaron's hand to help him stand up.

"Yes, I'm sure just don't laugh ok."

"As if I would but what about music, we can't dance without music." Now it was Aaron's turn to look embarrassed. "I've, er, well, I've got something we can dance to."

"Have you?"

Aaron nodded. "You know I said that I don't do soppy with music. Well, I heard this song at the garage the other day. It's an old one, it's not all slushy and over the top but the words got to me. They say exactly what I think of you. I was going to play it for you sometime anyway, see if you like it, so we might as well kill two birds with one stone." Flynn smiled at him. Aaron had done it again, done something he never would have expected him to do in a million years, found a song to express his feelings for him. They walked back into the room and, as Aaron searched for the song, Flynn shut the doors that led to the balcony. The song started and Flynn thought it sounded vaguely familiar but he wasn't sure. Aaron walked towards him and Flynn put his arms around him and held him close. Aaron copied what Flynn had done and they began to sway to the music:

_Have I told you lately that I love you_

_Have I told you there's no one above you_

_Fill my heart with gladness, take away my sadness_

_Ease my troubles that's what you do._

_For the morning sun in all it's glory, greets the day with hope & comfort too_

_You fill my life with laughter, you can make it better_

_Ease my troubles that what you do._

_There's a love that's divine and it's yours and it's mine like the sun_

_At the end of the day we should give thanks and pray to the one….._

After a couple of seconds, Aaron began to relax. "So, how am I doing?" he said.

"Well, you haven't stood on my feet or anything. You're doing fine."

Aaron closed his eyes and moved in time with the music just as Flynn was doing. He smiled, he suddenly got it, he knew now what Flynn had meant when he said about people being wrapped up in their own little world because that's where he was now, in a world where there was just him and Flynn, where he felt happy and loved and he guessed Flynn felt the same. They danced until the song finished. Flynn looked at Aaron with tears in his eyes.

"Hey, what's with the tears. Are you ok?" Aaron said concerned.

"I'm fine. It's just tonight, being here with you, that song, it's just a bit overwhelming."

"You soft sod" Aaron said softly. " So, what do you think of it, the song I mean?"

"I love it. Is that our song now?"

Aaron laughed. "Our song, why not? Every other couple has a song that means something special to them so why shouldn't we?" He wiped the tear away from Flynn's cheek before leaning in to kiss him again.

As they kissed, Flynn backed Aaron slowly towards the bed before they tumbled onto it, their hands opening the buttons and zips on the other ones shirt and trousers. Aaron caught a glimpse of Flynn's smooth chest and some of his six pack and he knew that the shirt had to go. They broke contact so Aaron could remove Flynn's shirt and he waited expecting Flynn to do the same to him but he didn't. He left Aaron's shirt open and just let his hands and mouth wander inside over his body. Aaron groaned as Flynn's hand touched that spot near his waist that was extra sensitive. Aaron pulled Flynn on top of him. Flynn looked into Aaron's eyes, seeing pure lust and desire staring back at him. It would have been so easy to give in but if he did, everything would be over too quickly and he didn't want that, not for Aaron and not for him either. When Aaron reached for him, he pushed Aaron's hand away Without breaking eye contact, he shook his head slowly. "We're not going to rush this" he said quietly "we've got the whole night and we're going to make the most of it." Aaron gazed at Flynn. If he had asked him at that moment to sit up and beg, he would have done, such was his desire for him but all he could do was nod. Flynn kissed him on the mouth, down his neck, over his chest before finally removing his shirt and carrying on where they'd left off. Something happened to their physical relationship that night. It seemed to move up to a completely different level. Their bodies were like finely tuned musical instruments with both of them knowing exactly what to do to hit just the right notes at the right time. They may have been in that room together but their minds were elsewhere, somewhere where rational thought wasn't possible, where the only thoughts available to them were ones of pure pleasure and whatever wonderful sensations they were going to be subjected to next.

A couple of hours later, as they lay recovering, both knew something very special had happened between them. They had made love many many times but never like that. Flynn turned on to his side to look at Aaron who still lay with his eyes closed, his breathing gradually returning to normal. He stroked his finger across Aaron's chest and watched him quiver knowing that even that small touch would feel like ten thousand volts shooting through him. He knew because, had Aaron touched him, that's exactly how he would have felt. Aaron opened his eyes and smiled at him.

"Wow, I have never felt anything like that before."

"Me either. It was…." Flynn shook his head completely lost for words. Aaron snuggled up against him as Flynn put his arm around him and held him. "This whole night has been perfect. I don't know what we're going to do next year to top this."

"I know, it's not going to be easy."

Aaron moved his head slightly so he could look Flynn in the eye. "I love you" he said.

Flynn smiled at him. "I love you too." They kissed again before falling asleep, the love between them even stronger than before if that was at all possible.

When Flynn woke up the next morning, he reached out for Aaron but found he was in bed alone. He sat up and saw Aaron wrapped in a hotel dressing gown sitting out on the balcony. He got up, put the other dressing gown on and went out to him. He kissed the top of his head and sat down next to him.

"Hey, what are you doing out here?"

Aaron reached out and took Flynn's hand in his, kissing the back of it.

"I just want to make all this last as long as possible before we have to go back. I want to remember every little detail." Flynn smiled at him. "You make it sound like we'll never do anything like this again."

Aaron smiled back at him. "It's not that. It's just last night really meant a lot to me."

"I know, it meant a lot to me too." They shared their first kiss of the day before getting breakfast sent to their room. They had decided to have a massage before going home but whether that massage would be from a professional or from each other, they had yet to decide.


	31. Chapter 31

Aaron was in his room putting some clean clothes away, waiting for Flynn. He had just finished talking to Hazel and was in a good mood. Moving away from the village had definitely been the right thing for her to do. Every time they spoke, she was more like her old self and it made him happy to see her getting back to normal. He checked his watch and smiled knowing that Flynn wouldn't be too much longer. Since their anniversary, they had grown even closer although neither had thought that was possible. They hated being apart, both feeling incomplete without the other, like something was missing. He heard footsteps on the stairs and turned to see Flynn coming into his bedroom. They smiled at each other as Flynn walked up to him and kissed him before sitting down on the bed.

"Paddy said you were hiding up here" he said.

"I'm not hiding, I've just been talking to Hazel. I told her all about our anniversary and me being able to stay at your place now even on a school night."

"_All_ about our anniversary?" Flynn said with raised eyebrows and a smile on his face.

"Well obviously not all about it but enough to let her know what a great time we had" Aaron said smiling back at him.

"So, how is she?"

"She's much better, definitely getting back to her old self because she spent half the conversation telling me about all these young good looking men she gets to talk to now." Flynn laughed as Aaron closed the drawer he'd put the last of his clothes in and came over towards the bed. Flynn moved over so they could relax on the bed together.

"So, did she have anything else to say?"

"Only that she thinks I've got a great boyfriend and should hold onto him." Flynn turned his head to look at Aaron. "See I've always thought she spoke a lot of sense. So what did you say?" Aaron turned towards him. "I said I agree." He leant over and kissed Flynn, putting his arms around him, pressing himself against him as he did so.

"I thought you said we were going for a pint, that's the only reason I came over" Flynn said smiling at him.

"We are, just not right now" Aaron replied as he kissed him again, revelling in the feeling of Flynn's strong arms around him, Flynn's hands beginning to work their magic on him as his worked their magic on Flynn. Almost reluctantly, Flynn broke their kiss and Aaron looked at him wondering what had made him stop.

"I think before we go any further, you might want to close your bedroom door. I know Paddy's alright about us but I really don't think he wants to see it happen right in front of his eyes." Aaron sighed and got off the bed to close the door.

Flynn loved being kissed by Aaron. He loved the softness of his lips, the gentle scratch of his stubble against his face and the taste of him when their tongues met. He loved the moment just before it happened too, when his heartbeat quickened, anticipation flooded through him and that last split second of eye contact before he closed his eyes and waited for Heaven to arrive.

Aaron loved being kissed by Flynn. He loved how Flynn's lips felt pressed against his own, the tenderness that was always there and how good it felt when Flynn's tongue played games with his. When Flynn looked at him just before they kissed, he could hardly breathe and the second their lips touched, he just melted. If he was a dying man granted one last wish, it would be for Flynn to kiss him. With the door now firmly closed, Aaron walked back across the room to Flynn. "Satisfied?" he said.

"Not yet" Flynn replied reaching for him, pulling him into his arms "but I have a feeling I soon will be."

Some time later, having both showered, they were getting dressed ready to finally go for that pint.

"What are you like with a paintbrush?" Aaron asked pulling on his t-shirt.

"Well, I'm no Van Gogh but I'm not bad" Flynn replied standing to zip up his jeans.

"Van who?"

Flynn looked at Aaron. "Van Gogh, even you must have heard of Van Gogh."

Aaron looked at him completely expressionless, keeping a straight face for as long as he could before bursting out laughing. "Listen, college boy, you're not the only one with brains you know. Course I've heard of Van Gogh. He painted that vase of flowers and then did something weird with his ear."

Flynn nodded his head. "Yep, sums him up perfectly that does." Aaron came over and sat down on the bed next to Flynn while they both put their trainers on. "Anyway, why are you asking what I'm like with a paintbrush."

"I want to redo this room and I thought you might like to help me. I mean you stay here often enough, your clothes are in that drawer, it's our room now, not just mine so I thought we could do it together." They smiled at each other, neither one able to help themselves.

"What did you have in mind?"

"Well, see that wall, I thought we could make that a feature wall, you know, get some wallpaper with a big pattern on it, something that would compliment the cushions and candles….Hey" he laughed as Flynn threw a pillow at him.

"I thought you were serious for a minute there. I was trying to think of a way of telling you nicely no way" Flynn said.

"Feature walls, cushions and me" Aaron said "Really? No, I just want to paint it again, that's all. So, will you help me?"

"Course I will, have you got the paint and stuff?"

"No, I thought we could go and get it tomorrow. We can choose the colour together then." They smiled at each other again.

"And Paddy doesn't mind"

"Haven't asked him yet, I'll ask him when I see him." He leant over and kissed Flynn gently. "Come on, let's go get that pint."

They went downstairs and looked for Paddy but he wasn't in so they set off for the pub. As they walked down the road, Flynn glanced across at Aaron and smiled.

"And what are you smiling at?"

"Just thinking, less than an hour ago, we were…"

"I know exactly what we were doing less than an hour ago and so will everyone else if you keep grinning like that."

"Sorry, I'll try to look more miserable, practise my Aaron scowl."

"Oi, cheeky, I don't scowl, well, not very often now."

Flynn put his arm around Aaron and hugged him. "No, you're a proper little ray of sunshine now aren't you?"

"Get off" Aaron said shrugging Flynn's arm away. "Come on, you're buying." They walked into the pub and went to the bar. Aaron looked around and seeing Paddy left Flynn to get their drinks and walked over to join him.

"When did you sneak out then?" he said sitting down.

"I didn't sneak out, I even shouted up the stairs to tell you I was going out but you never answered."

Aaron pulled a face. "Never heard you. Anyway, I want to ask you something. Is it ok if me and Flynn decorate our room?"

Paddy smiled at him. "Aaw, listen to you, our room, how cute is that?" Aaron sighed and shook his head. "Look, can we or can't we?"

"Course you can."

"Thank you." Flynn arrived with the drinks and sat down. He looked at Aaron wondering if he'd said anything to Paddy. Aaron smiled at him. "Better wear some old clothes tomorrow, don't want to get paint on anything decent."

"So you'll just be wearing your normal stuff then" Flynn replied. Paddy nearly choked on his beer, spitting a bit out as he struggled to contain his laughter. Aaron looked at him. "Classy, Paddy, very classy and you" he said pointing at Flynn "you're just lucky I'm in a good mood." They spent the rest of the evening chatting and playing darts. All too soon, it was time for them to go home. Flynn stood up and winced. The pain was back, the one that had been there off and on for a couple of days now. Aaron noticed his face and asked what was wrong. Flynn shook his head, telling him it was nothing, just a bit of a stomach ache. Aaron had no choice but to believe him although he wasn't convinced.

The next morning, Aaron and Flynn went to get the paint for their room. Flynn was feeling much better so Aaron was happy. When they got back, they pushed all the furniture away from the walls so they could get behind it, changed into some old clothes and started work. Between them it didn't take very long and they stood back to admire their handywork. "Looks better, doesn't it? Aaron said.

"Yeah, brightens it up a lot. Shouldn't take long to dry then we can move everything back." Aaron looked at him and smiled. "Look at the state of you, you've got paint everywhere."

"Only because someone kept flicking it at me."

"Not my fault I'm better with a roller and paint brush than you are."

Flynn walked over and kissed him. "Right, I'm off for a shower then."

"Fancy some company?" Aaron said "It'll save on water."

"But you've hardly got any paint on you." Aaron picked up a paintbrush and dabbed some paint on both of his arms. "I have now. Come on" he said taking Flynn's hand.

After their shower, they went downstairs to get something to eat. Aaron put a sandwich in front of Flynn and sat down with his own. Flynn took a couple of bites but he wasn't really that hungry so he left the rest. Aaron watched him. "Not eating that" he said. Flynn shook his head. "Not really that hungry."

"You're not feeling ill again are you?"

"No, I'm fine, just not that hungry. You have it if you want it." Aaron shrugged and ate what Flynn had left. By the time they went back upstairs, the paint was dry so they moved the furniture back into place. Flynn looked at the bed.

"That duvet cover doesn't go." Aaron looked at him. "You what? You're not serious are you?"

"Well it doesn't and neither do the curtains now. What's the point in painting the room and making it look better if we keep a duvet cover and curtains that don't go?"

"Oh my god, I can't believe I'm hearing this. Are you sure you don't want nice fluffy cushions while we're at it." Flynn laughed. "I don't think fluffy cushions are us, I mean my room doesn't have any, does it?"

"No yours is just so organised. Even your CD's are in alphabetical order."

"Well how else are you supposed to find the one that you want?" Aaron walked over to him. "See these" he said pointing to Flynn's eyes "They're called eyes and you can look for things with them. They're brilliant for that."

Flynn punched him on the arm. "You're so funny." He looked at his watch, then back at Aaron. "We've still got time you know. We can be there and back before you know it."

Aaron sighed. "You're not going to be happy until we change them are you?" Flynn shook his head. "Right, let's go then" he said with resignation. They went downstairs to get Flynn's car keys. Paddy was in the kitchen and shouted to them "Off out again, where to this time."

"Ask Laurence Llewellyn whats his face here. Apparently, the curtains and the duvet cover don't go with the new paint" Aaron stated.

"Well if they don't go, they don't go, you'll have to change them." Flynn flashed a grin at Aaron who flashed a sarcastic grin back.

"Cheers Paddy, you're a big help. See you later." When they returned, they changed the bedding and the curtains and stood back to have a look.

"Well, I was right wasn't I?" Flynn said, nudging Aaron's arm.

"OK I admit it, it does look better." Flynn smiled at him, then his expression changed, his face contorted in pain. "Flynn, what is it, is it your stomach again?" Aaron asked placing his hand on Flynn's arm. Flynn put his hands in the small of his back and stretched. "Probably pulled something moving that furniture."

Aaron was unconvinced. "Yeah but it wasn't right yesterday either and you didn't eat much today. That's not like you."

"Don't worry, I'm fine, honest. See, all better" he said. "Now, I'm off home and I'll see you on Wednesday." They kissed goodbye and Flynn left. First thing the next morning, Aaron phoned to check on Flynn. He said he was fine, he sounded on top form so Aaron relaxed and stopped worrying.

When Wednesday arrived, Aaron and Flynn were both looking forward to seeing each other. Aaron went off to work and Flynn went off to college both counting down the hours until they could be together. By the time Flynn pulled up in the college car park, he wasn't feeling great. He felt like he was going to throw up and his side was hurting him again. As he got out of his car, Nick was waiting for him.

"You don't look too good, are you ok?" he said.

"Yeah, just feeling a bit sick that's all."

"Heavy night last night was it?"

"I wouldn't mind if it had have been but no it wasn't."

"Look, why don't you go home, you're obviously not right."

Flynn looked at his friend. "I'm here now. I'll give it an hour or so, if I still feel like this, I'll go home then, ok." They walked slowly towards the college entrance and into the building. "Wow, it's warm in here today" Flynn said, removing his jacket and jumper. Nick looked at Flynn, the building felt the same to him as it always did. Suddenly, Flynn bolted for the toilet, Nick following close behind, hearing Flynn being sick as he got there. Flynn flushed the toilet and came out to splash some water on his face.

"Right, that's it, I'm taking you home and phoning a doctor" Nick said, concern for his friend etched on his face. Flynn just nodded. He wasn't one for exaggerating but he genuinely felt like he was dying, the pain in his side was unbearable now. He leant on Nick for support as they made their way slowly back towards the car park. They were a couple of feet from Nick's car when Flynn let out an almighty scream and collapsed on the floor.


	32. Chapter 32

**I'm not a medical expert, the details are basically accurate but may not be 100% correct. **

"Flynn!" Nick yelled. He crouched down next to his friend shaking him gently at first, then harder. "Flynn, come on mate" he pleaded but there was no response. With shaking hands, he phoned for an ambulance. He struggled to keep calm as they asked question after question after question. He felt like shouting just get the ambulance here now but he knew he couldn't, he had to keep it together. As he was talking, he heard a siren in the distance and prayed it was heading their way. He put his hand on Flynn's arm. "D'you hear that, they're on their way" he said "hang on pal." A crowd had gathered as they always did when something like this happened, whispering and murmuring but Nick tried to ignore them, concentrating on reassuring Flynn. The siren got louder and louder and relief flooded through him as he looked up and saw the ambulance drive through the gates and pull up near where Flynn was lying motionless on the ground. "They're here now, you'll be ok, you'll be ok" he kept saying to an unresponsive Flynn. The crowd parted as the ambulance crew ran over. "What's his name?" one of them asked. "Flynn" Nick replied. "Flynn, Flynn, can you hear me?" Nothing. Nick had to go through again what had happened that morning as they carried out some basic tests. When Nick had finished speaking, they lifted up Flynn's t-shirt and pressed around his groin. Nick was no expert but even he knew Flynn's stomach shouldn't look swollen like that on one side. "Right, we need to move him now. Radio ahead and tell them to get a theatre on standby." One ran off and the other stayed with Flynn. "What's wrong with him, please, just tell me" Nick begged. "We'll know more when we get him to hospital" he said. With Flynn on a stretcher and Nick sitting in the ambulance with him, the journey to the hospital with the lights and siren on took less than ten minutes. Flynn was rushed through the casualty department and into a different treatment area where a doctor was waiting. He checked Flynn like the paramedic had and nodded. "Right, we'll take it from here." There was a flurry of people and activity and Flynn was gone.

The paramedic smiled at Nick. "I know it's easy for me to say but try not to worry, he's in the best place now." Nick just nodded. "Thanks, for your help. Suppose I better phone his parents, let them know what's happened." He phoned Flynn's house and his mum answered. She burst into tears when she heard, then, when she'd pulled herself together told Nick she'd contact Flynn's dad and brother and they would be there as soon as they could. When she phoned Harrison, he said "Have you told Aaron?"

"We don't have his number. Have you got it?"

"No but I know where he works. I'll go and pick him up." He drove the few miles from his office to Emmerdale with a sick feeling in his stomach. He pulled up at the garage and took a few deep breaths before getting out of the car. He couldn't see Aaron but there was a pair of boots sticking out from under a car so he headed towards them. The silence was broken by a voice saying "Can I help you?" and Harrison looked into the not particularly welcoming face of Cain. "I'm looking for Aaron, I'm Flynn's brother." Upon hearing his voice, Aaron pushed himself out from under the car and stood up, wiping his hands on an old cloth. "Alright, what are you doing out this way?"

"It's erm it's Flynn, he's been rushed into hospital." Aaron couldn't believe what he was hearing. He shook his head. "No, no, he can't have been, I spoke to him, he was fine."

"What happened?" Cain asked.

"He collapsed at college, that's all we know." Aaron was leaning against a car, still shaking his head. Paddy was passing by and seeing the serious faces decided to go and find out what was happening. "What's going on here then has someone died?"

"It's Flynn, he collapsed at college, they've taken him to hospital" Cain said quietly.

"On my god I'm so sorry." He looked at Aaron seeing pained blue eyes looking back at him. "It's happening again Paddy. What am I going to do? I can't go through this again." Paddy put his arm around him and hugged him.

"I'll take you to the hospital Aaron, come on" said Harrison.

"Is it ok if I come too?" Paddy asked. "Yeah, no problem, let's just get a move on alright." They arrived at the hospital and were directed to the waiting room where Flynn's mum and dad were sitting with Nick. "Is there any news, what have they said?" Harrison asked. "He's in theatre, that's all we know." Aaron almost trance like went and sat in the corner of the waiting room. With his elbows on his thighs, he sat with his head in his hands, eyes closed. Paddy introduced himself to Flynn's family before going to sit down next to Aaron. He didn't speak, he knew better instead leaving Aaron to sit in silence. Every time the doors opened, they all looked up expectantly only to see a nurse or porter smile apologetically as they made their way to somewhere else. The minutes went by as silence filled the room, everyone lost in their own thoughts. In a quiet voice, Aaron said "I can't believe this is happening, it's Jackson all over again."

"No it isn't, this is completely different to Jackson" Paddy said.

Aaron looked at him with tears in his eyes. "Is it cos it doesn't seem like it to me. I'm sitting here unable to do anything to help him, not knowing whether he's alive or.." he stopped himself. "So, you tell me how this is completely different to Jackson."

Paddy was saved from having to answer by the doors opening and the entrance of the doctor. He looked at the sea of faces in front of him before starting to speak. "Right, Flynn had a burst appendix. We've removed it and I'm pleased with how the operation went. Our concern is when an appendix bursts, it releases bacteria into the body which can enter the bloodstream. At the moment, we don't know how badly Flynn has been infected. We've taken some blood tests and we'll know more in a couple of hours when the results come back. In the meantime, he'll be given antibiotics as a precaution and we'll be keeping him in for at least a week."

"But he'll be ok won't he?" Aaron said. The doctor smiled at him. "Like I said, we'll know more when the blood tests come back but he was brought here very quickly and he's a healthy young man. The signs are good. We'll get him settled on a ward and then you can go and see him though maybe not all at once." He smiled at them again and disappeared back through the doors. Relief surged through all of them as they hugged each other and waited to go and see him. The only one who didn't join in was Aaron. He stayed sat in the corner. He should be pleased, Flynn was going to be ok and he was pleased but his overwhelming emotion was fear. He'd been reminded yet again how much Flynn meant to him, how much he needed him and how unbearable the thought of being without him was and it frightened him to be that dependent on someone else.

"Aaron, you ok?" Paddy asked. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Why don't you get off, I'll phone you later after I've seen him."

"If you're sure."

"I am." Paddy squeezed Aaron's shoulder as he stood up and said his goodbyes. Nick stood up next. "I better be going too."

"You don't have to. Don't you want to see him?" Flynn's mum said

"I'll come back tonight. You should all see him first."

Flynn's mum hugged him. "Thank you for looking after him."

"Right, I need some fresh air" Flynn's dad said. He'd been gone a few minutes when Aaron decided to join him. He found him smoking in a shelter. "I gave these up years ago" he said.

"The old keep a packet in the car for emergencies routine is it?" Flynn's dad smiled. "Something like that." They stood in silence for a while before Aaron spoke again.

" I've spent so much time here I'm surprised there's not a seat with reserved for Aaron Livesy on it."

Flynn's dad looked at Aaron. "A young lad like you, you can't have spent that much time around hospitals surely." Aaron looked back at him. "You'd be surprised."

He took a deep breath before carrying on speaking. "Jackson, he was my boyfriend before Flynn, he had an accident in his van and they brought him here. He was unconscious for a week. Then, when he came round, they did some tests and realised that he was going to be paralysed from the neck down so they moved him to a different hospital. More waiting rooms but they all look the same after a while." Flynn's dad looked at Aaron shocked at what he'd just heard. "Paralysed from the neck down. I can't imagine what that must have been like for both of you." Aaron smiled a small smile, knowing now where Flynn got his compassion from.

"That's exactly what Flynn said when I told him. Anyway, it wasn't all doom and gloom, we had some good times before he got ill again, then, he was brought back here and here's where he died." Aaron kicked at some stones on the floor, his eyes cast down as Flynn's dad raised his eyes to the sunny sky while he tried to swallow the lump that was lodged in his throat. He tried to digest what Aaron had just told him and shook his head. Poor kid, no one his age should have had to go through that. He felt so sad for the serious young man standing next to him. Aaron cleared his throat. "Back then, after he died, I don't know how I would have coped without Flynn and I don't know how I'd cope without him now." His voice began to quiver and his tears began to flow. Flynn's dad threw away his cigarette and hugged Aaron letting him cry, what else could he do? "You won't have to cope without him, he'll be ok." Aaron nodded wiping his eyes on his sleeve. "Shall we go back in and see him then?" They walked back into the hospital together and back to the waiting room. A nurse came in and brought them up to a ward of four beds, two of which were occupied. Flynn was at the far end near to a window. Aaron wanted to run over to him but he decided to let Flynn's parents and brother go first.

"I'll go and get a coffee" Aaron said "come back in a while." When he returned, Flynn's parents were standing outside the ward waiting for him. "How is he?" Aaron said. "Tired but he's asking for you. Look, we're going to get something to eat, we'll give you a lift home when you're done." "Thanks" Aaron said. He took a deep breath and walked over to Flynn's bed. Flynn's eyes were shut. He looked so peaceful, Aaron didn't want to disturb him. He turned and began to walk away when he heard " and where do you think you're sloping off to. I've been waiting for you." He turned around again to see Flynn smiling at him. He walked over and kissed Flynn not caring who saw, such was his relief at seeing his boyfriend again. He sat down on a chair next to his bed holding Flynn's hand in his. "So, how are you feeling?"

"Like I've been kicked by a horse inside and outside."

"Do you remember much?"

"Not really, the most terrible pain I've ever felt and then waking up in here. Anyway, how are you?"

"Me? I'm fine." Flynn looked at him. "Seriously, I'm fine."

"Aaron, this is me you're talking to. I know you. No lies, remember. Being here must have brought back some horrible memories."

Aaron put his head down. "Yeah, it did and ok I'm not fine. I thought they were going to come and tell me that you were, that I'd…"

"That you'd lost me" Flynn said gently.

Aaron nodded. " I kept thinking about seeing you for the last time, telling you how much I love you knowing you wouldn't be able to hear me or say it back, saying goodbye." Aaron's tears were falling again as were Flynn's.

"Oh Aaron" Flynn said "come here." Aaron stood up and being careful not to lean too heavily against Flynn hugged him. Flynn held him as tightly as he could manage until both of them had stopped crying. "It'll take more than a burst appendix to separate us two. I'm sorry you had to go through all that." Aaron moved away and sat back down on the chair, wiping his eyes with his free hand, the other holding Flynn's hand in his again. "Well, you didn't do it on purpose did you?"

"No, but I hate seeing you sad."

"Yeah well, that'll change now I've got you back. Look, happy face again" he said as he smiled at Flynn. They chatted for a bit but Flynn was really tired. His parents came back to collect Aaron and, just as they were saying their goodbyes, the doctor came over. He smiled at them. "I've had the results of the blood tests back and they look fine. The bacteria levels are normal. We'll carry on with the antibiotics just as a precaution but there's no reason to expect anything other than a full recovery." Flynn and Aaron grinned at each other as the good news sank in completely forgetting there were other people there too.

Every day, starting with the day after the operation, the nurses had made Flynn get out of bed and walk around the ward a few times a day. The first day had been agony but gradually it got easier and less painful. The periodic blood tests all came back showing no sign of infection and, after ten days, Flynn was allowed home. He had been home for about an hour when Aaron arrived. They talked politely to Flynn's family but they just wanted to be on their own. Subliminally, the message must have got across because after half an hour, they found themselves with the house to themselves. They cuddled up together on the sofa enjoying being close to each other again. "So, are you glad to be back home again, everything back to normal" Aaron asked.

"Well, it's not exactly back to normal. You haven't heard my list of instructions for the next few weeks."

"Oh right, well tell me then." Flynn took a deep breath. "First, plenty of rest, no driving for two weeks and er no strenuous physical exercise for at least four weeks."

Aaron moved to look at Flynn. "Four weeks! Four weeks!"

"Yeah well, I'm not exactly thrilled about it either. Apparently, it'll take that long for all the tissue to heal properly."

"Yeah but four weeks." Flynn laughed. "Anyone would think you only wanted me for my body."

"Now you know that's not true. I just didn't realise that's all. I thought we might have to be careful for a while but.."

"If you say four weeks one more time, I'll slap you."

Aaron smiled. "I suppose I can still kiss you, that doesn't count as physical exercise does it?"

"Not in my book" Flynn said as he placed his hand around the back of Aaron's neck and pulled him into a kiss, their first proper kiss in almost two weeks and it felt so good, neither wanted to stop.

The weeks soon passed although to Aaron and Flynn, it felt like an eternity. Flynn still wasn't fully fit, he still suffered some discomfort every so often and it was getting him down. Aaron decided to take him out for a meal to try to cheer him up. They went to a nice Italian restaurant and had a lovely meal. It was the first time they'd been out for the night since Flynn became ill and they both enjoyed themselves. Flynn suggested going on to Bar West, making a proper night of it and Aaron happily agreed. They had a few games of pool and a couple of drinks before Flynn felt a bit tired so they went to sit down. "We can go home if you want, we don't have to stay" Aaron said.

"No, we're staying. Now I'm out, I'm going to make the most of it." Aaron cuddled up to Flynn, they drank their drinks and watched the world go by. Flynn looked at his watch. It was nearly closing time, time to head back.

"Ready to go?" he said to Aaron.

"In a minute, I just need to go to the loo first." He kissed Flynn before setting off through the crowds. By the time Aaron came back, the music had slowed down and Flynn was standing up ready to go. Aaron took his hand and headed straight for the dance floor. "What are you doing?" Flynn said.

"I said if I didn't make a complete prat of myself, we'd dance with each other next time we were here didn't I?"

"Well yeah, but I didn't think you meant it."

"I don't tell lies, you should know that by now." Flynn's smile was a joy for Aaron to see as they put their arms around each other and moved in time to the music. Aaron thought he'd feel embarrassed but he didn't. Too soon for both of them, the music stopped. "Thank you for making my night" Flynn said before kissing Aaron.

"My pleasure. We'll have to do it again sometime."

They got a taxi back to Flynn's house. Flynn looked at Aaron sitting next to him and knew that tonight he wanted him. He missed that connection to him and wanted to get it back. They went into the house and up to Flynn's room. They both got ready for bed, both leaving their boxers on and cuddled up together. For once, Aaron was in the role of protector with Flynn lying in his arms rather than the other way round. They lay for a few minutes enjoying the feeling of their bare skin against each other. Flynn took a deep breath and looked at Aaron.

"Aaron, will you sleep with me?"

"I am aren't I?" Aaron said looking at him.

"No, I mean sleep with me" Flynn said not taking his eyes off Aaron.

"Oh, I see. Well, erm, isn't it too soon, I mean, are you sure?" Aaron stuttered.

"Yeah, I am. I wouldn't have asked if I wasn't unless you don't want to."

Aaron smiled at him." Course I want to but I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't. I trust you."

Aaron took a deep breath. He wanted Flynn so badly but this wasn't about what he wanted, it was about what was best for Flynn. "I don't know, maybe we should wait a bit longer, just to be sure."

"I don't want to wait. Please, Aaron, I've really missed being with you" Flynn said quietly. He placed his lips against Aaron's and kissed him, slowly and tenderly. With every second they kissed, Aaron's resistance wilted.

"I've missed being with you too but..."

Flynn kissed him again, his arms wrapped around Aaron, holding him close. Aaron smiled at him. "OK but we stop if it's too much for you." Flynn nodded as Aaron kissed him, their hands exploring each other's bodies, familiarising themselves again. Flynn removed Aaron's boxers and waited for Aaron to do the same to him. With shaking hands, Aaron removed them before gently moving his hand over Flynn's side and scar. "Is that ok?" he asked in a quiet voice. Flynn smiled at him. "It's fine" he said. Their kisses became more intense as their need for each other grew. Aaron rolled on top of Flynn, taking all his weight on his arms. He lowered himself gently, watching Flynn's face for any sign of discomfort or pain. "Still ok?" he asked. Flynn put his arms around him and pulled Aaron down so all his weight was on top of him. He raised his hips and pressed himself against Aaron a couple of times, smiling as Aaron groaned. "More than ok, now no more questions." They made love to each other, more cautiously than they usually would but neither of them cared. That connection between them had been remade and they both hoped it would never be broken again.


	33. Chapter 33

**These characters are Emmerdale's and not mine.**

It had been a beautiful warm June day and Aaron and Flynn had spent the afternoon together lounging around in the sun at Flynn's house. Flynn's parents were away and Harrison was staying with his new girlfriend so they had the place to themselves. They'd sunbathed, had a barbecue, drank a few beers and generally just relaxed. It was two months now since Flynn's operation and things had settled back down again for both of them. Well, as far as Flynn was concerned they had. His energy levels still weren't quite what they should be, he still ached occasionally but apart from that he was fine. Aaron, on the other hand, was a completely different kettle of fish and wasn't doing quite so well. What had happened to Flynn had really shook him up and he worried about him constantly when they weren't together. It wasn't healthy and he didn't like feeling the way that he did but he couldn't help it. He just hoped it was a phase that he was going through and that the longer that Flynn remained well, the sooner it would disappear and he could relax again.

They'd gone back into the house having been out in the sun all afternoon and were relaxing together on the sofa watching TV. Aaron looked down at Flynn, lying against him and all he wanted to do was hold him, keep him safe and protect him forever. Flynn stirred, sat up and turned to look at Aaron. "Fancy another beer?" he asked.

"Yeah, alright then, I'll get them" Aaron said going to stand up.

"No you don't, I'll go." He walked into the kitchen enjoying the feeling of the cold floor beneath his bare feet. He went to the fridge and took out two bottles of beer. He knew Aaron still worried about him and he didn't like it. He'd caught him numerous times just watching him, making sure he was ok. He wished that he could take that worry away from him but he knew that he couldn't, it was something that Aaron was going to have to sort out for himself. He brought the beers in and put them on the table sitting back down next to Aaron. He leant over and kissed him, a long gentle kiss that he eventually broke.

"What was that for?" Aaron asked.

"For being you, for being gorgeous, for still worrying about me even though you don't have to, for being the fittest boyfriend in the world ever with the best…."

"Alright, alright" Aaron said blushing "how many of those have you had?"

"Not that many and even if I hadn't had any, I'd still say the same things. You should learn how to take a compliment. Listen, you haven't forgotten that I'm out with Nick tomorrow night have you?"

Aaron went quiet. "No, I haven't forgotten. Are you sure you'll be ok, are you sure you're up to it?"

"Aaron, I'm going for a couple of beers, not climbing Mount Everest." Flynn put his hand on Aaron's leg and squeezed it gently. "It's no different to me and you going out for a drink except Nick doesn't get a kiss at the end of the night, or anything else for that matter."

"Well, I always knew he wasn't your type" Aaron said a small smile breaking out on his face before looking serious again. Flynn turned towards him.

"Look, I know what happened to me scared you and I know why it scared you but you can't wrap me up in cotton wool. I'm fine and I'd tell you if I wasn't, you know I would."

Aaron nodded. "I know you would but it doesn't stop me worrying." Flynn smiled at him. "Well, what if I said that I can think of a way to stop you worrying."

Aaron looked at him. "Sounds interesting."

"It is. Why don't I show you just how well I've recovered just to put your mind at rest." He kissed Aaron again, more passionately this time, one hand resting on Aaron's thigh, the other roaming slowly over Aaron's bare chest and down over his flat stomach, making Aaron groan as his body responded to what Flynn was doing to him. Aaron ran his hands through Flynn's hair before placing one hand on the back of Flynn's neck, pulling him closer to kiss him deeper, while his other hand traced gently over the bare skin of Flynn's back making him shiver and let out a groan of his own. Flynn pulled back and looked at a slightly breathless Aaron, his own feelings mirrored in Aaron's blue eyes. He stood up and held his hand out to Aaron.

"Do we have to move, I mean it's not like we're going to get disturbed is it?" Aaron said.

"No, we won't get disturbed but there's more room upstairs and for what I've got in mind, the more room we have the better." Aaron allowed himself to be pulled up off the sofa and Flynn led him upstairs to his room. They didn't really have defined roles in their relationship, whichever one of them wanted to take the lead did, both equally happy whether dominant or submissive. Flynn was obviously in dominant mood tonight and Aaron was more than happy to go along with him. Last time Flynn had been in this sort of mood was on their anniversary and what a night that had been. As they kissed again and fell onto the bed, as Flynn took charge and Aaron became like putty in his hands, for the first time since Flynn's operation, Aaron felt himself completely relax. It was just like their anniversary night all over again, both completely in tune with each other, knowing exactly what the other person wanted and needed, and what to do when in order to satisfy each other completely.

Lying side by side afterwards, Aaron couldn't help but smile. He looked at Flynn lying with his eyes closed, his glistening body that Aaron knew every inch of relaxing, his chest rising and falling as his breathing gradually returned to normal and he knew he didn't have to worry anymore. He had his Flynn back. Without opening his eyes, Flynn said "I can feel you looking at me you know."

"Can you?" Aaron said as he turned on to his side to cuddle up against him. Flynn opened his eyes and smiled at him, putting his arm around him, wanting to maintain that physical contact and closeness. "Yes I could. So, now do you believe me that I'm back to myself again and fully recovered."

"Yeah, I think you might have just about convinced me."

"No more worrying then?"

Aaron smiled. "No, no more worrying." He placed his hand against Flynn's face and kissed him softly and tenderly, a kiss that Flynn eagerly returned. When Aaron broke the kiss, he carried on looking into Flynn's eyes seeing what he was feeling reflected there.

"What?" Flynn said quietly.

"You, you're amazing and I'm not just saying that because of what we just did."

"Aaron" Flynn said embarrassed, his cheeks going slightly red.

"Now who can't take a compliment?" Aaron said teasingly. Flynn smiled at him, Aaron smiled back. "Seriously though, you just mean everything to me and I love you."

"I love you too."

"Good, so you won't mind getting me a drink then while I nip to the loo" said Aaron as he got up out of bed and walked across the room towards the door.

"What did your last servant die of?" Flynn said "anyway, you're the one who's out of bed."

"Yeah but I'm the guest, you're supposed to look after me, cater for my every need."

"In your dreams" Flynn said.

"No, in my dreams, you do something completely different to me." As he reached the door, Aaron turned round and said "I don't suppose you could find something for us to eat while you're at it, could you, I'm starving." He just managed to get out of the way as a pillow flew through the air in his direction. Flynn smiled at the space where Aaron had been standing before getting out of bed to get them something to eat and drink. That night, they both slept cuddled up together, wishing it could always be like this, just the two of them.

The next morning, Flynn brought Aaron his breakfast in bed before Aaron went back to the village. He felt back to himself, the horrible feeling of constant worry gone. He went to work with a smile on his face, humming a tune he'd heard as he got out of the shower. Cain teased him relentlessly all day but Aaron just let him get on with it, giving as good as he got. That evening, he went for a drink with Adam in the pub, enjoying spending time with him as they didn't see as much of each other as they used to. As he was walking home, his mobile rang. He smiled when he saw Flynn's name.

"Hey, I wasn't expecting to hear from you. Needed to hear my voice again did you?"

"No, just thought I'd let you know I was back safe and sound."

Aaron smiled. "So did you have a good time?"

"Yeah, I did but I still missed you."

"Yeah, I missed you too. So, are we still on for Friday?"

"Absolutely, what are we doing?"

"I thought you could come to mine and I'd get us something to eat."

"Right, so it's beans on toast or cheese on toast then is it?"

"No, I was going to cook something decent actually."

"But you can't cook Aaron."

"Well we'll see on Friday won't we?"

"Ok, what time do you want me?"

"Eight o'clock"

"Great, see you then."

"Yeah, see you Friday. Love you"

"Love you too."

Now Aaron had a problem. He wasn't the best cook in the world but he really wanted to do this for Flynn, to do something that required a bit of effort rather than just picking up the phone. When he got home, Paddy was up so Aaron told him about the conversation he'd just had with Flynn.

"So let me get this right" Paddy said, placing two cups of tea on the table "you've offered to cook for Flynn on Friday but you have no idea what you're doing."

"Yeah, I know. I just wanted to do something nice for him, something different. He's always cooking for me."

"Yeah, because he can." Paddy smiled at him. "Look, if you really want to do this, why don't you ask for some advice from someone who cooks for a living."

"What Marlon, no way. I'm not going to him for help. I'd never live it down."

"Well, that's up to you. I suppose it depends on how much you really want to do this."

Aaron pulled a face. "Yeah but Marlon, you know what he's like."

"He'll help you, you know he will, so what if you have to put up with a bit of teasing, you've put up with worse." Aaron nodded. "Ok, I'll ask him."

The next day, around lunchtime, Paddy was eating his lunch at home when the front door opened and Aaron came in, slamming the door behind him. He flopped down on a chair and looked at Paddy.

"Next time I have an idea like cooking for Flynn, stop me and talk me out of it."

"Do I take it that you've been to see Marlon then?"

"Yeah, I have and what a joy it was too. Three times he made me say it, three times I had to ask him and I know he heard me the first time, git. And he kept me waiting for about twenty minutes before he gave me an answer. He even asked me if I was going to pay him."

Paddy smiled knowing how much Marlon would have enjoyed winding Aaron up.

"But he's going to help you isn't he?"

Aaron nodded. "Yeah, he's going to come round later. He reckons I should do a curry because everything's in one pan and you can do it slowly and he reckons it's so easy, even I can't mess it up."

"Sounds like a good idea. So I suppose you'll want me out of the way on Friday then."

"If you don't mind, doesn't have to be all night though."

"Thank you very much, that's very kind of you to let me know I can sleep in my own bed in my own house."

Aaron smiled at him. "This had better be worth it."

"It will be. Flynn'll love that you've gone to so much effort for him."

Marlon was true to his word and came round later that evening. He reigned in his overwhelming desire to tease Aaron at every opportunity, only throwing in the odd comment because he knew that for Aaron to have asked for his help, it must be important to him. He showed him what to do including making the sauce from scratch and Aaron took it all in. It didn't seem that difficult really and Aaron was sure he could reproduce it on Friday.

When Friday came around, all Aaron could think about was his curry. He pretended he wasn't worried but he was. He just wanted it to be ok, in fact, he'd settle for it just being edible and not poisoning either of them. Cain had to be somewhere, no questions asked, so he closed the garage an hour early, something Aaron was extremely grateful for. He went home, jumped in the shower, changed and started preparing their meal. At about seven, there was a knock on the front door. Aaron was sure he'd said to Flynn eight, not seven. He opened the door and Marlon was standing there. "Just thought I'd see how you're getting on. Smells alright." he said, walking into the kitchen. He checked what Aaron had done, had a little taste and nodded. "See, told you even you couldn't mess this up."

"Yeah well, thanks for all your help."

Marlon smiled at him. "You're welcome."

Paddy came into the kitchen. "That does smell really good, are you sure there's not enough for two more?"

"Yes, I'm positive, now are you two going to get lost or what?"

They left Aaron to wait for Flynn and headed to the pub. Aaron went upstairs to change into a clean t shirt and put some aftershave on before going back downstairs. Flynn arrived a few minutes early carrying some beer.

"Well, something smells good and the food doesn't smell too bad either" he said kissing Aaron. Aaron smiled at him. "Hope you're hungry."

"I'm starving, want one of these" he said indicating the beer he was carrying.

"Yeah, that'd be great." Flynn opened two bottles, handed one to Aaron and sat down with the other one. Aaron served up the curry and sat down with Flynn.

"This looks great" Flynn said as he tried a mouthful. Aaron watched him, waiting to see his reaction. "And you made this yourself."

"Yeah, why is it bad?"

Flynn smiled at him. "No, this is really good."

"Honestly, you're not just saying that."

"No, I'm impressed, try it for yourself if you don't believe me." Aaron took a mouthful and was pleasantly surprised. It did taste good. He relaxed then as they ate their meal and drank their beer. It was a warm evening, and with a full stomach, Flynn knew if he sat down much longer, he'd probably fall asleep.

"Fancy a walk or something, I'll be asleep soon otherwise."

"Yeah, ok." Aaron grabbed his keys and they left the cottage and strolled down towards the open fields.

"So, for someone who can't cook, that was really good."

"Yeah well, I told you I'd cook something decent didn't I?"

"You did, I'll have to believe you next time won't I?"

"Who says there'll be a next time after what I went through." He explained to Flynn about asking Marlon for help and the teasing and the sarcastic comments that he'd put up with.

"And you did all that just to cook something for me" Flynn asked.

"Yeah. I could have phoned for a takeaway but I wanted to make an effort."

Flynn smiled at him before hugging him. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." In the distance, there was a rumble of thunder, the air was a bit cooler and you could tell a storm was on it's way. They turned to walk back the way they had come, not walking too quickly, both enjoying the fresh air. The next rumble of thunder was much louder and large raindrops began to fall. Within seconds, the heavens had opened and the rain absolutely bucketed it down. They ran to the cricket pavilion to get out of the storm but by the time they got there, they were both soaked through. They looked at each other and laughed, the rain dripping off their faces, their t shirts showing all the contours of their bodies as the thin material clung to them.

"Urgh, I look like a drowned rat" Flynn said wiping the water off his face and running his hands through his hair. Aaron walked over to him. "Maybe but an extremely hot drowned rat" he said as he put his arms around him and kissed him. Lightning lit up the sky and another rumble of thunder sounded overhead.

"I love thunder storms" Aaron said "there's something about all that energy and electricity crashing together."

"Easy tiger" Flynn said laughing "Don't want you getting too excited, well, not while we're out here anyway."

Aaron ran his hands over Flynn's torso and looked him straight in the eyes. "Don't we, why not, who'd know?" They kissed again. Flynn could feel Aaron's body pressed close against him, feel the familiar feelings that being this close to Aaron evoked in him . Was Aaron serious or just teasing, he didn't know. Aaron broke the kiss and smiled at him. " Come on, we need to get back to my place quickly."


	34. Chapter 34

Aaron woke up early the next morning with Flynn's arm across his stomach and one of his legs resting on top of his. The sun was shining and there was a gentle breeze blowing through the open window. This was probably his favourite part of the day. It was when he was at his most relaxed and contented, when he had the most special person in the world to him lying sleeping next to him. He would never admit it to anyone but it was also the time that he felt the most grateful, when he felt the need to say a silent thank you to whatever force had brought Flynn back into his life again. He felt Flynn stir next to him and watched as he opened his eyes. He smiled when he saw Aaron looking at him and snuggled up even closer to him. "Morning" he said "you alright?"

"Yeah I'm fine, you?" Aaron said smiling back at him.

"Mmm, great. Looking forward to the next thunder storm if it means we have another night like last night."

Aaron blushed. Even after all this time together, he still got embarrassed when Flynn paid him a compliment, especially if it was concerning their love life. "So, what d'you want to do today?" he asked, wanting to change the subject.

"Well, I need to get some new stuff, jeans, trainers, a few t-shirts but, as I know how much you love shopping, I was going to go on my own and come back for you later."

"No, I'll come with you, I don't mind" Aaron replied.

"Are you sure cos I'm not rushing around like an idiot just because you'll be with me."

"I know, just try and make sure we're not still traipsing around when the shops are shutting, alright."

"Alright" Flynn agreed before kissing Aaron. If he was expecting anything else that morning, he was about to be disappointed as, when he broke their kiss, Aaron got out of bed and began to throw some clothes on.

"Where d'you think you're going?" Flynn asked.

"I'm going to sort out some breakfast for us while you have a shower, then I can have one later. The sooner we go, the sooner we can get back and do something we'll both enjoy a lot more." He walked towards the door and turned around. "And if you're still lying there when I get back, I'll drag you out of bed, right."

Flynn laughed. "Now there's something I never thought I'd hear you say, that you'd drag me **out** of bed."

"Yeah well, I agree, it would probably be a one off so don't make me do it, ok?"

A couple of hours later, Flynn had parked his car and they were walking round the shops. Aaron had a bit of an ulterior motive for accompanying Flynn. It was Flynn's birthday in a couple of weeks and Aaron had no idea what to get him. He was hoping that while they were out today, Flynn might mention something that he wanted otherwise, he really didn't know what he was going to do. The shopping was going quite well, all things considered. Flynn had got his trainers and some new t-shirts, it was the jeans that was causing the problem. According to Flynn, so far, the jeans he had tried on were either the wrong colour, too light, too baggy, too tight, slightly too long, slightly too short, just didn't feel right or any combination of the above. Aaron was just about managing to keep his mouth shut but he didn't know for how much longer he'd be able to go without saying something. He never knew buying jeans could be so difficult, mind you this was Flynn he was talking about and he did like everything to be just so. They were heading towards yet another shop that sold jeans when they heard a girl's voice calling Flynn's name. Flynn turned round, smiled and hugged the girl who had thrown her arms around him. She was about the same age as Flynn but she wasn't one of his friends that Aaron had met.

"God, I haven't seen you for ages, how are you doing?" Flynn said.

"I'm fine, you?"

"Yeah, I'm good, so where have you been hiding then?"

"Oh, you know, here and there. Besides, from what I've been hearing, I'm not the only one who hasn't been about much. I heard you were off the market again. So, are you going to introduce us?" she said looking towards Aaron.

"Course, Abi, this is Aaron. Aaron, Abi, she's an old friend."

Aaron smiled at her. "Alright" he said. She smiled warmly at him. "Nice to meet you." She looked back at Flynn. "He's cute, much better than the last one." Flynn smiled, not quite sure what to say to that as Aaron just stood there looking surprised.

"Anyway, I won't keep you both, I'm sure you've got better things to do than stand here talking to me. Take care, yeah?" she said as she walked off. Flynn looked at Aaron. "Sorry about that, she always says things without thinking."

"It's fine, I can live with being called cute. Fancy a coffee before we carry on?"

"Yeah great." They walked down the road to the coffee shop, bought their drinks and sat down on a sofa at the far end of the shop. Aaron was curious about Abi. He thought he'd met most of Flynn's friends but he hadn't even heard her name mentioned. Before he even realised what he was doing, the question was out of his mouth.

"So, where d'you know Abi from then?"

"Oh, I've known her four, five years now. She's not from college, that's why you've never met her before, we used to hang around together in a group. We don't really see that much of each other anymore, just occasionally we'll bump into each other like we did today. She er helped me to realise that girls weren't my thing if you know what I mean. You know, tried it once and didn't like it." He smiled sheepishly at Aaron, hoping that Aaron would understand what he was trying to say. Aaron looked at him and smiled. "Yeah, I know what you mean. I did the same thing."

"Did you?"

"Yeah, as you said, tried it once, didn't really like it but then I wasn't quite so quick to accept things as you obviously were so I tried it again just to be sure, still didn't like it so that was that." Flynn nodded. "Abi was really good about it, helped me a fair bit. How about the girl you were with. Do you still see her?" he said drinking some of his coffee.

Aaron coughed. "It's er, well, erm, it's not her, it's them. It was two different girls." He put his eyes down, unable to look at Flynn. Flynn raised his eyebrows. "You little devil you. You really did want to be sure didn't you?" Seeing how uncomfortable Aaron looked, he said in a quiet voice "Look, you don't have to say anything else about it if you don't want to. It's really none of my business. We can talk about something else, anything else, whatever you want."

"No, I don't mind, honestly. It's not like it's a secret in the village or anything like that. It was Victoria and Holly so, in answer to your question, yeah, I do still see them."

"Holly, as in Adam's sister Holly. Bet that went down well."

Aaron took a mouthful of coffee before carrying on. "Yeah, like a lead balloon. Adam had an idea that Holly wasn't really my type and he didn't want his sister messed about."

"Understandable."

Aaron nodded and waited, wondering whether Flynn would ask how Adam knew, thinking about whether he could tell him about trying to kiss him after their near miss in the car but he didn't need to worry. Flynn had obviously heard enough. He looked at him and smiled. "Still, it's all in the past now isn't it? It doesn't matter what happened back then, all that matters is how you feel now."

"I know and I've never felt happier and I mean that."

"Course you've never felt happier, you've got me, I mean who wouldn't be happy, what more could you possibly want?"

"A chocolate chip muffin to go with this coffee would be good."

"You and your stomach, is it ever full?" Flynn asked. Aaron shook his head. "I'll be back in a minute then" he said using Aaron's knee to lean on as he stood up, knowing it was probably the only physical contact he could get away with at that moment. He was surprised Aaron had told him what he had, that was a conversation he hadn't been expecting to have. It just showed how far they'd come for Aaron to volunteer something so personal. He felt like he could tell Aaron anything and it was nice to know Aaron trusted him enough to do the same. Once they'd finished their drinks, they went back out to the shops and the search for that elusive pair of jeans. They finally found a pair that Flynn was happy with and they went back to the car. The only disappointment was that Aaron still had no idea what to get Flynn for his birthday, Flynn hadn't said a word about anything he wanted. As Aaron was putting his seat belt on, he felt Flynn looking at him.

"What is it now?" he said.

"I was just thinking, what you told me in the coffee shop. I know it wasn't easy for you."

"Yeah, well it couldn't have been any easier for you to tell me what you did. Besides, I don't want us having secrets."

"No, me either." Flynn leant over to give Aaron a quick kiss before they drove off.

The following Wednesday, Cain sent Aaron into town to collect some spare parts so, making the most of the opportunity, Aaron thought he'd have another look for a present for Flynn. He'd been in and out of a few shops and was already starting to get disheartened. Nothing he saw appealed to him and not having a definite idea of what he wanted wasn't helping either. He stopped outside a jewellers shop and looked in the window. "Aye, Aye, what are you looking for?" a familiar voice said as Adam slapped Aaron on his back.

"Something for Flynn's birthday. It's in a couple of weeks and I haven't got the foggiest idea what to get him."

"So how old will he be?"

"Twenty, why, what's that got to do with anything?"

"Nothing, just being nosy." Adam looked at what was displayed in the shop window. "Why not get him a watch?"

"Cos he's got one" Aaron said. Adam looked at his friend. "You are allowed to have more than one you know. If you get him one like that" he said pointing out a watch to Aaron "you could get it engraved, make it a bit more personal like."

"That's not a bad idea actually."

"Well don't sound so surprised, I have my moments you know. Blimey, have you seen the prices of those?" he said pointing at a tray of diamond engagement rings. Aaron looked and whistled. "Yeah, it's a good job Flynn's not a diamond ring type of bloke." Adam laughed. "Well, if that's what they cost now, I dread to think what they'll cost when I'm ready to buy one."

"You won't ever be ready to buy one" Aaron said "you'd have to find someone daft enough to marry you first."

"And I will, when I'm ready. Still, at least you know it's something you won't ever have to fork out for."

"Yay, lucky me."

"So, what do you lot do then, you know, when you get engaged I mean." Aaron turned to look at him, a look of astonishment on his face.

"What do us lot do? I don't know, I haven't got to the chapter on engagement in my how to be gay handbook yet, idiot" he said elbowing Adam in the ribs. "How am I supposed to know?"

"Sorry mate, no offense, I was just thinking out loud. I mean, when you get engaged to a girl, you buy her one of those don't you but when it's two blokes…." he trailed off, leaving the sentence unfinished.

"Like I said, I don't know, maybe they don't buy each other anything."

"They must do. I mean, if I asked a girl to marry me, I'd want her to have the biggest ring going, you know, let everyone see she was taken, warn everyone to keep their hands off." Aaron laughed. "So according to what you've just said, it's nothing to do with love, it's just about marking your territory. That's what dogs do, isn't it? And you wonder why you're single."

"Hey, I'm single cos I want to be, no other reason."

"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that. Now, if you ever want any advice…"

"About relationships? From you? You're joking aren't you?"

"Hey, I'm not the one whose single am I? I must be doing something right."

"Nah, Flynn's just got lower standards than me. Anyway, now I've sorted out your problem about what to get him for his birthday, I'm going to head off. See you back in the village alright?"

"Yeah, cheers mate, see you later." As Adam disappeared up the road, Aaron had another look at the watch that Adam had pointed out. He smiled to himself and went into the jewellers before heading back to work, spare parts collected and feeling a lot happier.

That feeling of happiness soon became replaced by a feeling of anxiety as Flynn's birthday got closer and closer and his watch still wasn't ready. He'd asked for it to be engraved and the assistant had promised him that it would be ready in plenty of time but, here he was, two days before his birthday and still no watch. He was just thinking about phoning the shop again when his mobile rang. He answered it and was relieved to hear the voice of the sales assistant from the jewellers telling him he could collect the watch any time he wanted. He asked Cain if he could take his lunch break so he could go and collect it. Cain agreed providing he ran a few errands for him while he was out which Aaron was more than happy to do.

On the day of his birthday, Flynn arrived at Aaron's place around lunchtime. It was an unseasonably warm day for June, Aaron was wearing shorts and a t shirt, Flynn shorts and a vest. Aaron looked at Flynn's tanned skin, his muscular arms shown off to perfection and grinned broadly. Flynn's eyes travelled up and down Aaron's body as he smiled back. Aaron closed the door and they moved at the same time to kiss each other.

"Blimey, it's hot out there" Flynn said. He sat down at the table in the kitchen while Aaron went to the fridge to get him something cold to drink.

"Here you go, happy birthday" Aaron said, handing Flynn his present before walking back over to lean against one of the cupboards to watch him open it.

"Cheers, mate" he said as he took it, twisting it round in his hands, holding it up to his ear and shaking it gently. "How old are you?" Aaron said "You won't get any clues by doing that." Flynn smiled and opened his present, gasping when he saw the watch. He took it out of its box and examined it closely. "I er had it engraved on the back" Aaron said. Flynn turned the watch over and read the inscription. It said Happy 20th birthday, all my love forever, Aaron. Flynn looked up at Aaron, a look of pure adoration on his face. "This is fantastic, thank you. I don't know what to say" he said as he took off the watch he was wearing and put on his new one.

"You like it then" Aaron said. Flynn got up and walked over to where Aaron was standing. "I love it and I love you." He kissed Aaron again, it was supposed to be a kiss to say thank you but, whether it was the heat or the emotion of the moment, he didn't know but it soon developed into a completely different kiss, something much more passionate that neither wanted to stop. "Where's Paddy?" Flynn murmured as he placed lots of little soft kisses down Aaron's neck .

"Out, all day" Aaron replied. They grinned at each other and headed towards the stairs. Just before they got there, Aaron's mobile rang. "Leave it" Flynn said kissing him again. Aaron tried to ignore it but it kept ringing and ringing. He pulled away and smiled apologetically at Flynn before taking it out of his pocket. There was no name but the number looked vaguely familiar so he answered it. He walked a few paces away from Flynn and listened intently . Flynn walked over and stood in front of Aaron, running his finger down Aaron's chest before hooking it inside the waistband of Aaron's shorts. Aaron put his own hand on top of Flynn's to stop it moving any further and mouthed stop it as he tried to concentrate on what was being said to him. Flynn just grinned at him but he didn't take his hand away and Aaron didn't move it. "Can you just hang on one second, please" he heard Aaron say. Aaron took the phone away from his ear and smiled at Flynn. "It's the bloke I rented the cottage from. Someone's had to cancel and he wants to know if we'd be interested in renting it for a week."

"When?"Flynn asked "Will you be able to get the time off work?"

"The week after next, I'm owed some time off so what do you think?"

Flynn's smile lit up his face."Like you need to ask, yes, tell him yes." Aaron returned the smile before resuming his conversation. "Sorry about that, yeah, we'll take it. Is it alright if I give you a call back later to sort everything out though only I'm a bit busy at the moment." He raised his eyebrows at Flynn who grinned back at him. Aaron ended the conversation and threw his mobile onto the side. "Now, aren't you glad that I answered it?" Flynn nodded. "Yeah, this birthday just keeps getting better and better."


	35. Chapter 35

Aaron and Flynn were sitting at the table in the kitchen at Aaron's place drinking coffee and chatting about their upcoming holiday. The warm weather was showing no sign of disappearing and they hoped it would stay that way while they were away. They were like two small children in the run up to Christmas such was their excitement at the prospect of going away together again. They talked about it all the time, wondering if things had changed since they were there earlier in the year and discussing what they were going to do as they had a whole week together this time. Neither of them could wait and they were just crossing off the days until Saturday arrived.

"I'm just glad we won't have to light that fire this time" Aaron said "it was great when it was done but it took us ages."

Flynn looked at him with a quizzical look on his face. "What's this we and us? You must have been on a different break to me cos I don't remember you doing a thing as far as the fire was concerned, I did it all whenever it needed doing."

"Well, I offered encouragement, didn't I?"

"If you call haven't you got that thing going yet, it's freezing in here, what's taking you so long, how hard can it be encouragement, then yeah, you did" Flynn said smiling at him.

"Yeah well, so lighting fires isn't my thing. We can't all be good at everything can we?" Aaron said as he went to the cupboard and took out a packet of biscuits, taking a couple for himself and handing the packet to Flynn. " Anyway, I was checking on the internet for stuff to do while we're up there and there's a music festival on the Sunday after we arrive. It's not far from where we'll be staying, I thought it might be worth a visit, that band we went to see when we first started seeing each other are playing, what d'you think?"

"Sounds great as long as we won't be up to our knees in mud."

"Flynn, it's the English summer so it probably will chuck it down and be muddy and your hair will get all messed up and your clothes will get dirty but that's part of the fun isn't it?"

"Yeah, I suppose so" Flynn said dipping his biscuit into his coffee before eating it. "If the weather is going to be bad, I hope they've added to their DVD collection, there wasn't a lot of choice last time was there?"

"No not really still I'm sure we can always amuse ourselves, we didn't have any problems last time did we?" Aaron said grinning at Flynn and raising his eyebrows.

"No, we didn't but we can't do that all week even if we wanted to."

"Maybe snakes and ladders will still be there, that could keep us occupied for a while." They both laughed.

"Let's hope so" Flynn said "In fact, I might just go and buy my own and bring it with us just in case." Paddy came in to the kitchen at that point and said "buy your own what just in case?"

"If I told you, you wouldn't believe me" Aaron said.

"Try me, I hate only catching the end of a conversation, I'll be wondering all day what it could be if you don't tell me."

Aaron shook his head. "You're a sad man, Paddy. Snakes and Ladders, that's what he was talking about, it's his favourite board game."

"Is it really? I prefer Cluedo myself, you have to think a bit more. Anyway, isn't Snakes and Ladders a bit boring for you two, I mean it's not exactly the most exciting game on the planet is it?"

"It is if you play it his way" Aaron said grinning at Flynn. Flynn nearly choked on his mouthful of coffee, just about managing to swallow it before breaking into a coughing fit. "Sorry, went down the wrong way" he said looking at Aaron.

"What do you mean it is if you play it his way, there's only one way to play isn't there?" Paddy said looking at Flynn. Flynn looked at Aaron's smug face and thought right, two can play that game. He smiled sweetly.

"Well, you see, me and Aaron found this new way of playing." Aaron looked at him with a you wouldn't dare expression on his face. "What you do is, you play normally but, when you land on a ladder…." At that point, Paddy's mobile rang. He looked at the screen. "Sorry, I've got to take this" he said walking into the other room.

"What do you think you're playing at? You weren't really going to tell him were you?" Aaron said horrified. Flynn grinned at him. "I might have done, I might not. You'll never know now, will you?" Aaron took a mouthful of coffee and pulled a face. "Urgh, cold. Fancy a proper drink?" he said. "Yep, sounds good" Flynn replied taking his mug, rinsing it under the tap and putting it on the side by the sink. When he turned around, Aaron was standing waiting for him. "Are you just going to leave that there?" he asked looking at Aaron's mug which was still standing on the table.

"Yeah, I'll sort it out later or Paddy will."

"You're a lazy sod" Flynn said shaking his head as he walked over and picked it up and rinsed it out just like he'd done with his own.

"Yeah and you're way too obsessed with things being tidy for a guy your age" Aaron said. Flynn walked over and Aaron pushed him gently towards the door. "Come on, let's go" he said "before you get the urge to take out the hoover and give the place a proper tidy up." Flynn smiled and put one hand on the door handle, ready to open the door but Aaron put his own hand on top of Flynn's stopping him. Flynn turned his head to see what Aaron was up to but Aaron just leant against him and kissed him. "To keep me going til later" he said smiling at Flynn "We can go now."

"Are you sure?" Flynn said.

"Well, maybe just one more then" he said putting his arms around Flynn and kissing him again. "Now we can go."

They walked down the road to the pub still chatting about their upcoming holiday. They ordered their drinks and went and sat down. When Adam came in, he saw the two of them, heads together talking nineteen to the dozen and sat by the bar. He ordered his drink and decided to leave them alone. He was pleased for Aaron, him and Flynn were a perfect match and it was great seeing him so happy but he missed spending time with him. Flynn looked up and saw Adam sat with his back to them and thought it was strange that he hadn't come over.

"Adam's over there" he said to Aaron.

"Is he, he'll probably be over in a minute." Flynn watched as Adam's drink was put in front of him and he stayed where he was.

"He's not coming over" Flynn said "do you think he's ok?"

"Dunno." Aaron turned around in his chair. "Oi, our company not good enough for you tonight?" Adam turned around, smiled and came over. "His is, not sure about yours though."

"Are you sitting down then or what?"

"Nah, I'm not stopping long, I'm just having the one and then I'm off. Besides, you think I want to spend my evening watching you two looking lovingly at each other all the time."

"Come on, sit down, we'll behave won't we?" Aaron said looking at Flynn.

"Absolutely" Flynn nodded "promise."

Adam smiled again and sat down.

"Actually, you can do me a favour if you don't mind" Flynn said. "I'm out on Thursday with some friends from college, you know end of term and all that, you don't fancy taking him out somewhere do you only he'll sulk if he's left on his own for too long. Either that or he'll be phoning or texting me which I can well do without."

Aaron looked at Flynn. "Yeah right. I can survive one night without you you know. Still, a night out sounds good if you're up for it."

"Yeah, I think I can manage that" Adam said.

"Great but I'm not going anywhere where him and his mates will be."

"That's fine by me" Flynn said "but I can't tell you exactly where we'll be. All I can tell you is that I know where we definitely won't be and that's Bar West, oh and them couple of bars just down the road from there."

"Great" Adam said. "Another night in Bar West, I've spent nearly as much time in that place as you both have."

"And you love it, don't pretend you don't" Aaron said " and don't worry, I can always pretend to be your boyfriend again if you get any attention you're not comfortable with."

"As long as you don't try to kiss me again, I'll be fine."

Adam pulled a face as soon as the words were out of his mouth. Flynn looked at Aaron with a grin on his face. "Kiss him again. Something you'd like to tell me" he said. Aaron glared at Adam.

"Sorry mate, I forgot he didn't know. It just slipped out." Aaron shook his head. "Look, it was years ago, alright, it's really not worth talking about."

"Oh no you don't" Flynn said "come on, spill, what happened?"

"Cheers Adam, I owe you one."

"Look I said I'm sorry, you know me, my mouth works before my brain." Aaron looked at Flynn and sighed. "We were out in a car. I lost control of it and banged my head. He leant over and was looking at the cut and I…."

"You what?" Flynn asked innocently.

"I leant towards him but we never actually kissed and I had just had a nasty bang on the head." Flynn started laughing.

"Oh cheers for that" Adam said "And there was me thinking it was because I was so irresistible."

"As if. So, now you've completely embarrassed me, I'll go and get some more drinks. Same again?"

"Not for me mate, I'm off, I told you I was only staying for the one. See you in here on Thursday then, about seven."

"Yeah ok, see you then."

When Aaron came back with the drinks, he sat down next to Flynn who smiled at him. "Come on then, I know you're dying to say something, let's get it over with."

Flynn looked at him. "If you were going to pick someone straight to try and kiss I'm glad it was Adam."

"You what?"

"Well, it could have been someone who reacted differently, someone who could have punched you or told the whole village about it. It could have been a lot worse and he is kind of cute" he said nudging Aaron. Aaron smiled at him. "What can I say, I was confused."

"Well, we've all been there."

"Bet you never tried to kiss your best mate though, did you?"

Flynn put his head down. "No, not Nick but there was someone. I got my wires crossed and ended up with a black eye. Never made that mistake again so you're not the only one." Aaron reached out and held Flynn's hand. Flynn looked at him and smiled. "Good job we're sorted now isn't it?"

"Too right, I wouldn't want to go through all that again."

"No, me either. Fancy a game of darts?"

"If you don't mind losing."

"I'll take my chances." They stayed until they finished their drinks and then went back to Aaron's where they found the place empty. Paddy had left a note on the table saying that there was an emergency and he didn't know when he'd be back. Aaron looked at Flynn and smiled. "Looks like it's just me and you then" he said handing the piece of paper to Flynn for him to read.

"Oh well, I suppose there's worse people I could be here on my own with."

"You know you love me really."

"Yeah, you're alright I suppose." He pulled Aaron towards him and kissed him, stroking the short hair on the back of Aaron's neck, enjoying the familiar scratching of Aaron's stubble against his face as Aaron's hands rested on his hips, holding him close.

"Shame we haven't got snakes and ladders, I fancy a game right now" Aaron said.

Flynn laughed. "It wouldn't be worth getting it out of the box, it'd be the shortest game ever. I've only got three items of clothing on."

"That's three too many for my liking" Aaron said.

"Really, well you know what to do then don't you?" They smiled at each other before heading upstairs. Once upstairs, it didn't take long for both of them to have their clothes removed and for them to be in each other's arms in bed. Aaron stopped for a moment and looked at Flynn lying naked next to him. He loved him with all his heart and soul and knowing that the feeling was mutual just made everything they had even more special. Their eyes met and Flynn smiled at him, wondering what had temporarily distracted him. He put his hand against Aaron's cheek and stroked it gently. "You ok, you were miles away?" he said. Aaron smiled back at him. "Yeah, sorry, I'm fine, never better." Flynn moved his hand from Aaron's cheek to the back of his neck and pulled him down to kiss him, soft kisses, gentle bites, feather light touches sending Aaron into the realms of ecstasy, making him gasp and moan, unable to stop himself even if he wanted to. Aaron pushed against Flynn, pushing him onto his back and rolled on top of him. Flynn's arms were bent, hands by his head, palms facing upwards as Aaron's fingers interlocked with his. Aaron kissed him harder and more urgently, enjoying both the feeling of Flynn's body underneath his and listening to the sighs and groans that were escaping from Flynn's mouth. Despite the heat, he could feel Flynn shiver as he left his mouth alone and with his own mouth and tongue worked his way slowly over Flynn's chest and abs, down to the place where Aaron wanted to be and where Flynn so desperately needed him. This was going to be another one of their special nights, they both knew it, they could sense it, that unique connection that they shared was there again for both of them to feel and enjoy. Some time in the early hours, Flynn woke up. Aaron was sleeping soundly beside him, his eyelids fluttering occasionally as he dreamt. He mumbled something incoherent in his sleep and turned over. Flynn smiled, wondering what Aaron was dreaming about. He knew what he dreamt about, him and Aaron living happily together, just the two of them, how they both liked it. He kissed Aaron gently and settled back down. Maybe one day, his dreams would come true.

Thursday evening found Aaron waiting in the pub for Adam. He'd got their drinks and was just about to text him to let him know he was there when he came in.

"Alright" Adam said as he sat down.

"Yeah, good, you?"

"Yeah, I'm alright. Listen, about the other night, I really am sorry, I should think before I open my mouth."

"It's fine, don't worry about it. Turns out Flynn went through something similar except the guy wasn't as understanding as you were and hit him."

"You're kidding."

"No, I wish I was."

Adam shook his head. "Some people."

"I know. Anyway, ready for this?"

"Absolutely. Been looking forward to it all day." They drank the drinks Aaron had bought before heading into town. Bar West was busy, as it tended to be on a Thursday. Aaron left Adam to get their drinks and went to the toilet. He was unaware that he was being watched. The guy had seen him as soon as he came in, recognised him straight away. He looked to see if his boyfriend was with him and relaxed a bit when he saw that he wasn't. He was glad, it would give him a chance to get a closer look, so far he'd only seen him from a distance. Aaron came out of the toilets and began making his way through the crowd back towards Adam but it was too busy to go anywhere quickly. With his eyes searching for a way through, Aaron moved slowly forward. He saw a space in the crowd and moved towards it. Unfortunately, someone coming the other way had seen the same space and they bumped into each other. "Sorry" said a voice "I saw a gap and went for it." Aaron looked up to see who had spoken. The guy was just over six feet tall with spiky brown hair, a tanned complexion and green eyes. He was a couple of years older than Aaron, dressed on trend and smelt lovely. He smiled at Aaron who smiled back. "No problem" he said stepping to one side to let him through. "Cheers" the guy said. Aaron made his way back through the crowd and found Adam waiting with their drinks.

"Well, he must have really wanted to bump into you" Adam said handing Aaron his drink.

"You what, what are you talking about?"

"That guy who bumped into you, I'm sure he did it deliberately."

"Don't be daft, have you seen how crowded it is?"

"I'm telling you, I know what I saw. He did it deliberately."

"Behave yourself. Come on, the pool table's free."

From where he was sitting, the guy thought about the younger man he'd just bumped into. He was fit, sparkling blue eyes, a nice smile, very attractive. Now he knew what he looked like up close, he needed to talk to him. He wouldn't get a better opportunity so he watched and waited. He watched him as he played pool, laughed and messed around, then saw him go to the bar. He got up and headed after him. Aaron was standing at the bar waiting to order. The guy next to him picked up his drinks and moved away, the space he was occupying quickly filled by someone else. Aaron ordered two bottles of lager and while he was waiting looked to see who was standing next to him. He was shocked to see the same green eyes as earlier looking back at him.

"Hi again" the guy said. "Well, this is a bit awkward." Aaron just smiled.

"Busy, isn't it? Is it always like this, I haven't been here very often recently."

Aaron felt a bit uncomfortable but he didn't want to be rude. "Er, yeah, Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays, the rest of the time it's a bit quieter."

"Right, I used to come here a lot but I moved away, I've only just moved back to the area. I thought I'd check it out, see what's changed."

"And has anything changed?"

"Not really, it's busier than I remember but, other than that, no, it's still the same."

The barman put Aaron's drinks in front of him and held his hand out for the money. Aaron gave him the correct money, picked up the two bottles, smiled at the guy with the green eyes and went back to Adam.

"Guess who just spoke to me at the bar?" he said.

"Let me guess, that guy from earlier."

"Yep, how weird is that?"

"Not weird at all seeing as I told you he deliberately bumped into you. So, what did he say?"

"Not a lot, just said he used to come here a lot but he moved away and he's just moved back."

"Oh right. So, he didn't ask for your number then?"

"No, don't be stupid, he was only making conversation and I wouldn't have given it to him anyway."

"Yeah, well, don't look now but he's heading this way again."

"You're kidding." Aaron looked up as the guy with the green eyes walked past. He smiled at Aaron who smiled back.

"He must have it bad" Adam said "deliberately bumping into you, making sure he found you at the bar so he could talk to you…"

"Don't be ridiculous" Aaron said interrupting him "And even if he did do all that, which I doubt, he's wasting his time isn't he? I'm not interested. Now, are we playing pool or not?"

The guy with the green eyes was pleased. He'd seen him up close, spoke to him briefly and it confirmed what he already knew. He smiled to himself. This was going to be fun. He finished his drink and left.

The next night was Aaron and Flynn's last night before their holiday. They were sitting in Bar West having a couple of beers before heading back to Flynn's. He was going to drive so they weren't going to have a late one but both were too excited to stay in. From his position, hidden from view, the guy with the green eyes watched as they talked, laughed, kissed completely oblivious to his presence. That wouldn't last long, they'd know about him soon enough. He watched as they kissed again, a longer kiss this time. It should be him that he was kissing, that he was holding and touching. He narrowed his eyes as they whispered in each other's ears, smiled knowingly at each other and left hand in hand. That would be him soon. He wanted him and what he wanted, he usually got.


	36. Chapter 36

**The characters still aren't mine, they belong to Emmerdale.**

Aaron woke up and squinted as the bright sunlight hit him and a cool breeze blew across his face from the window they'd opened the previous night. He looked at the clock and groaned when he saw how early it was. He knew he would wake up early today, he always did when he was excited about something and he was excited about going on holiday with Flynn but he hadn't expected it to be quite this early. He looked at Flynn sleeping peacefully next to him, the duvet thrown back on his side of the bed revealing his tanned torso and muscular arms, the same torso that had been his pillow last night and the same arms that had been holding him when he fell asleep and he decided he couldn't wake him just yet so he let him be. He lay back and closed his eyes just in case he would be able to go back to sleep but he knew it was futile. He was looking forward to this holiday so much, just the two of them together 24/7 for a whole week. Their weekend away had been great but it had only been a couple of days. They'd never spent as long together on their own as they would be doing on this holiday. It was kind of like a trial run for living together, well, that was how he had started thinking of it anyway. He knew a week wasn't the same as living with someone full time but it would give him an idea of how things could be, an insight into a future he had already started to think seriously about. It soon became obvious that sleep wasn't about to return any time soon so he lay there and looked around his second bedroom. He looked at the now familiar furniture, the photo of him and Flynn that was beside their bed and his clothes in a heap on the floor. He noticed that Flynn's bag was already packed so they could head off after breakfast. He thought about how he hadn't quite finished his packing yet, well, hadn't even started his packing was more accurate and he smiled. Staring him in the face was proof of how different they both were but somehow as a couple, they just worked. The fact that they still fancied the pants off each other after all this time helped of course but it was more than just a physical attraction, much more. They were definitely living proof of the theory that opposites attract.

He stretched and let out a deep breath. He'd had enough now of being the only one awake so he changed position exaggerating turning over hoping to disturb Flynn but it didn't work. He sighed and tapped his fingers on the mattress. He stared at Flynn, hoping that somehow through his sleep, he would be able to sense he was being watched and wake up but that didn't work either. He called his name as he ran his fingers over his smooth chest and down over his stomach where they came to rest. Flynn sighed and twitched but he still didn't wake up. He kissed him on the cheek, then on the lips but there was still no reaction so, with desperate times requiring desperate measures he pinched him. Flynn's eyes shot open as he looked at Aaron.

"What the hell did you do that for?" he said rubbing his arm.

"At last, it's like trying to raise the dead trying to get you to wake up."

"Well you could try just giving me a nudge or calling my name, that tends to work really well and doesn't hurt as much" he said as he gently slapped Aaron with the back of his hand.

"Sorry, I did call your name and I tried a few other things but you never stirred. I couldn't think what else to do." Flynn looked at Aaron's sheepish face and his heart melted. Sometimes, he was just too cute for words and this was one of those times. He shook his head and smiled. "So, come on then, how long have you been awake?"

"A while, you know me, I can't lie in if I'm looking forward to something." Flynn put his arm around him and Aaron cuddled into him, placing a couple of little kisses on Flynn's chest as he did so. Flynn rubbed his hand gently up and down Aaron's body enjoying the feeling of closeness between them before daring to look at the clock. "Well, it's not as early as I thought it would be" he said "at least the sun's up before we are."

"Come on, you're just as excited about this trip as I am so stop pretending you're not."

"Course I am, a whole week just me and you on our own, I can't wait." He turned onto his side to face Aaron and, making sure there was barely enough room for air to be between them, he kissed him, a slow, lingering kiss that ensured both of them knew they weren't going to be getting up for breakfast any time soon. "Didn't you get enough of me last night?" Aaron said smiling at him.

"No, I could never get enough of you but, if you're not interested…" Flynn said turning away.

"Hang on, I never said that now did I?" said Aaron pulling him back and kissing him softly at first, taking only seconds to become more intense and fiery as they let their feelings take over and they started their day the way they'd finished yesterday.

Flynn was the first to move, pushing Aaron's leg off his and reluctantly extracting himself from Aaron's arms and getting out of bed. "Right, shower, then breakfast, then we can head back to yours to grab your stuff" he said.

"Yeah, about that, I haven't quite finished packing but it won't take me long, I promise."

"Why am I not surprised? Mr Last Minute, that's you." He put some boxers on and headed for the door. When he got there, he turned to look at Aaron.

"Oh and by the way, you know earlier, when you were trying to wake me up, you had me awake when you flopped over making all that noise."

"So why didn't you open your eyes then?"

"I wanted to see what you'd do next. It was getting interesting as well, with the kissing and stuff but then you let yourself down. Was pinching me really the best you could follow all that up with? I thought you had more imagination than that." He winked at Aaron who grinned back at him. "Well, I'll have to see if I can come up with something better next time then, won't I?"

"I'll look forward to it. Back in a few minutes." When Flynn returned, Aaron went for his shower and then they both dressed and went down to get some breakfast. Flynn's dad was in the kitchen and made them both a cup of tea.

"All set then" he asked.

"Well, I am, Aaron here hasn't even packed yet."

"Well, it won't take long for you to chuck a few things in a bag will it Aaron?" Aaron shook his head. "That's what I told him" he said.

"Just be grateful you're not going with a girl" Flynn's dad continued "then you'd have something to worry about. You should see the stuff your mum brings with her, you'd think we were going for months and most of it never gets used. Then there's all the just in case stuff." He put on a higher pitched voice as he said "I'll bring these shoes just in case the others hurt me or don't go with what I'm wearing, I'll bring this dress just in case we go anywhere nice, I'll bring this jacket just in case it rains." Flynn and Aaron both laughed. Flynn's mum came into the kitchen and asked what they were all laughing about.

"Just talking about going on holiday and people bringing too much stuff with them that doesn't get used" Flynn's dad said.

"Meaning me, I suppose" she said good naturedly "Still, at least it wasn't me who forgot their moisturiser last time and insisted on stopping off to buy some more was it love?"

"Dad, you didn't" Flynn said, the thought of his bear of a dad applying moisturiser just too funny.

"Well, you have to look after your skin these days, don't you, all that uva, uvb and stuff" he said looking at his wife who carried on sorting breakfast out for everyone, ignoring her husband's glare.

Once breakfast was over, Flynn put his bag in the car and him and Aaron went to say goodbye. He hugged his mum and dad, as did Aaron. Ever since that day at the hospital when he'd told Flynn's dad all about Jackson, Aaron had been quite tactile with Flynn's parents and it always made Flynn smile when he saw it. "Here" said Flynn's dad handing Flynn some money "use it for petrol or something."

"Cheers dad. Right, we'll see you in a week."

"Have a great time, hope the weather holds for you."

"Yeah, so do we."

They got into the car and drove off towards Emmerdale. "Fancy your dad using moisturiser, I can't believe that" Aaron said.

"No, me either. I never would have thought it in a million years. I really thought he was a soap and water man."

"And your mum doesn't let him away with anything does she?"

"No, he may be big but she's the boss, definitely."

Aaron turned to look at Flynn. "I like them, your parents I mean, they're alright." Flynn smiled. "Yeah I know, yours are alright too."

"You're kidding aren't you? Paddy is but my mum" his words trailed off.

"So, maybe she's not the most subtle of people and a volume button would be useful but she's alright and you know she is. She's always been nice to me."

"Yeah, I suppose. Oh, now that's a scary thought" Aaron said.

"What is?" Flynn asked.

"Well, I've just realised, the longer we're together, at some point my mum and your parents are going to have to meet aren't they? They met Paddy briefly at the hospital when you were ill but they haven't met mum yet."

"Wow, that should be interesting when it happens." They both laughed.

"That's one way to describe it. Maybe when it happens we could just sneak off and leave them to it, then come back later when it's all over."

"What and miss out on all the fun, no way" Flynn said. "I'm not missing that meeting for anything."

They pulled up outside Aaron's and went inside. In less than half an hour, Aaron's bag was in the car and they were off. As it was such a hot day, they had the windows down and the music loud enough to make your ears bleed. The journey passed by quicker than they remembered it doing last time and almost before they knew it, they were pulling in to the supermarket not far from the cottage to get some supplies. Aaron phoned the guy they had rented the cottage from to let him know how far away they were and just like before, when they got there he was waiting for them. He handed over the keys and left. Aaron and Flynn grinned at each other before taking their stuff out of the car and into the cottage. They had a quick look around and nothing had changed since the last time they had been there. They went out into the back garden which was fenced in and had decking, sun loungers and a barbecue, perfect if the sunny weather lasted. Aaron stood behind Flynn and put his arms around him. Flynn smiled as Aaron kissed the back of his neck, cuddling him for a few seconds before putting his hands in the front pockets of Flynn's shorts. " Well that's an interesting approach. No small talk, you just dive straight in there."

"I'm looking for something, alright."

"Well, you won't find anything to interest you in there, trust me."

"Wanna bet?" Aaron replied taking Flynn's phone out of his pocket and waving it in the air. "I'll take this thank you."

"And what are you going to do with it exactly?"

"The same as I'm going to do with mine. I'm switching them both off and putting them in the drawer until we leave. I don't want anything to disturb us this week." He planted a quick kiss on Flynn's lips before walking back into the cottage. They did very little for the rest of the day, just settled in and relaxed and slept well that night in their temporary home.

The next day was another warm and sunny day and the two of them had a great time at the music festival even if they did get a bit sunburned. They got back late and Aaron got annoyed because Flynn insisted on putting after sun on before coming to bed. Flynn tried to get Aaron to do the same telling him he'd regret it if he didn't but Aaron wasn't having any of it. The next day, however, he wished he'd followed Flynn's example because Flynn was fine while his own shoulders hurt. He got no sympathy from Flynn of course who reminded him it was his own fault and to stop feeling sorry for himself but luckily for him by the end of the day, his pink shoulders had turned a golden brown and he was fine again. They woke up the next morning to the sound of rain hitting off the window and a lovely fresh smell coming from the garden. Neither of them were bothered about the rain, it gave them an excuse to stay in bed longer, talking and relaxing, both more than happy to stay where they were. Eventually, hunger got the better of them and they got up, threw some clothes on and went to get something to eat.

"Shall I stick a DVD on then?" Flynn asked once they'd finished eating.

"Yeah, go on then" Aaron replied stretching out on the sofa. Flynn walked over to the shelf where the DVD's were. He scanned the titles before taking one off the shelf.

"Hey, look what's still here" he said holding a copy of E.T. "Sure I can't tempt you?"

Aaron frowned at him. "If you put that on, E.T. won't be the only one who gets to go home."

"But look at those eyes, how can you not want to watch it?"

"Very easily, I'm not the one with a thing for blue eyes am I?"

Flynn grinned at him. "Fair comment, ok, what else have we got?" He carried on looking but after a few minutes he still hadn't chosen anything and Aaron was getting impatient. "Come on Flynn, just pick one will you, I'm losing the will to live over here."

"Alright, keep your hair on, what little you've got. There's not exactly a lot of choice you know."

"Right, fine, whatever one you've got your finger on now, that's the one we'll watch."

Flynn looked at the DVD he now held in his hand. "Are you sure about this?"

"Yes, just stick it on and get over here."

"You really might want to think again, it's er High School Musical." Flynn started to laugh at the expression on Aaron's face.

"Oh, great" Aaron said "well at least you'd be happy, someone else with blue eyes for you to drool over."

Flynn screwed his nose up. "Nah, Zac Efron's not my type, he's far too pretty for me. I prefer my bloke to be a bit rougher round the edges, a bit mean and moody and, if he tucks his trackies in his socks, well, I'm his."

Aaron laughed. "Just put it back and pick something else then."

"Right, Men In Black or Shutter Island?"

"Either, both, I really don't care, just put one on and come and sit down." Flynn put one of them in the DVD player and joined Aaron on the sofa. "Finally" Aaron sighed as he snuggled up against Flynn. They watched both films and by the time the second one was finished, the sun had come out so they decided to go out for something to eat. They found a little pub not too far away where they spent an enjoyable evening before heading back to the cottage and bed.

The rest of the days flew by and before they knew it, it was their last night. From where he was sitting on the sofa, Aaron watched Flynn as he tidied up the kitchen. He was singing to himself and Aaron smiled. Their week had been fantastic and, if this was what living with Flynn would be like, he'd do it in a heartbeat but with Flynn at college and him not earning a great deal, it wasn't something they could make happen anytime soon. Plus he hadn't even spoken to Flynn about it, they'd never even mentioned it before, not even in a jokey way. Maybe he wouldn't like the idea, maybe he'd think they were too young, not ready for that kind of commitment. A few months ago, he'd probably have thought that himself but not now. Things had changed. He was beginning to think about his future and he wanted Flynn in it. Flynn glanced over at him and smiled.

"Come on you, out with it, what's on your mind? I can hear the cogs turning from here." Aaron smiled at him. "I was thinking about us actually."

"Oh yeah what about us?" Flynn asked as he dried his hands on a tea towel and brought over two bottles of lager, handing one to Aaron and sitting down next to him. Aaron looked at Flynn and took a deep breath, wondering what sort of reaction he'd get to what he was about to say.

"I was just thinking if we lived together, do you think it would be like it has been on this holiday?"

"What, you mean you sitting on your arse while I do all the work? It better not be." Aaron raised his eyes to the ceiling before looking back at Flynn. "I'm telling you now Aaron, if we lived together, you'd have to get your finger out and help. I'm not having you leaving everything to me."

"Yeah well, if we had our own place, I would get my finger out wouldn't I but you're such a neat freak, whatever I did probably wouldn't be up to your standards."

"I'm not a neat freak, I just don't like mess that's all."

"I bet if I put something back in the wrong place, you'd know and you'd have to move it wouldn't you? You'd be like that mad woman out of that film Misery."

Flynn laughed. "Cheers for that, I'm not that bad. Mind you, I wouldn't have to tell you if you'd upset me would I? I'd just have to stand there with a block of wood and a whacking great hammer and you'd soon get the message." Aaron pulled a face and shivered. "Urgh, I hate that bit."

"Yeah, me too even though you don't see it happen." They both fell silent, lost for a moment in their thoughts. Flynn's face fell serious as he looked at Aaron. "So, er, how seriously have you been thinking about us living together?"

Aaron shrugged. "I've been thinking about it for a while so pretty seriously. What about you, have you ever thought about it?" Flynn smiled at him and took Aaron's hand in his, letting their fingers intertwine.

"Course I've thought about it. Coming home to you every evening, sleeping in the same bed every night instead of just a couple of times a week, me and you together, it's all I've ever wanted, you know that."

"Yeah, I know, it's all I want now too and I'd have someone to do my washing for me, cook for me, run around after me, it'd be great."

"If that's what you want, then you're with the wrong bloke, mate" Flynn said, taking a mouthful of lager. Aaron looked at Flynn, his turn to look serious now. "No, I'm definitely with the right bloke. Look, I might have been joking about the washing and the cooking and everything but I've never been more serious about anything in my life. If we could make it happen, I wouldn't hesitate."

"No, neither would I."

"Really, you don't think we're too young to be thinking about it?"

"Why, do you?"

"I brought it up, remember, I wouldn't have done that if I thought we were too young now would I? So, what do you think? Do you think we're too young?"

Flynn pulled a face as he thought for a few seconds. Aaron's heart was pounding waiting to see what he was going to say next. "Maybe we are but what are we supposed to do, wait until we're twenty five or thirty because that's supposed to be a better age to settle down? I can only go by how I feel and me and you feel right." Aaron grinned from ear to ear, relief written all over his face. He threw his arms around Flynn and hugged him. "You have no idea how happy I am to hear you say that." Flynn looked into Aaron's sparkling, slightly watery eyes and he was filled with an overwhelming feeling of love for him.

"Why, you didn't honestly think I'd say no to the idea did you? I love you, don't you know that by now?"

"Yeah, course I do but even so, it's still a massive step."

"I know it is, but if it's what we both want, we'll make it happen one day. We've done alright so far haven't we?"

Aaron gazed at Flynn, into the eyes of the guy he adored and smiled at him. "Yeah, we have." They moved towards each other at the same time, their lips meeting and moving against each other for what seemed like an eternity in a kiss that spoke volumes about the depth of their feelings for each other. When they broke the kiss, both of them breathing heavily, Aaron couldn't say anything, the kiss had literally left him speechless. He reached for Flynn and pulled him towards him, kissing him with a passion that he was barely able to control. He wanted to claim every inch of Flynn for himself and it didn't take Flynn long to respond in the same manner. Neither cared if there wasn't much room, there was plenty of room on the floor if need be. All they wanted and needed was to be together in the most intimate way possible and the time and imagination to do whatever they wanted to do to each other whenever they wanted to do it. Their last night in their little cottage was going to be one they would not forget in a hurry.


	37. Chapter 37

With a heavy heart Flynn put their bags in the boot of his car and slammed it shut. He turned and leant against the vehicle, folded his arms and stared down at his feet, his elation and optimism after last night's conversation gone as he was faced with going back to reality. Aaron watched Flynn's shoulders go up and down as he took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. He knew how he felt because he felt exactly the same way. Neither of them had wanted the holiday to end as they were having such a good time together but, after their chat last night, it made leaving even harder because it meant going back to their everyday lives. Separate homes again, back to spending the night together a couple of times a week, back to waking up on their own more often than not, back to kissing each other goodnight and one or the other of them having to leave. Knowing that they wanted the same thing so badly but couldn't have it was hard to stomach for both of them. Aaron took one more quick look around the cottage to make sure they hadn't left anything behind, left the key on the table and walked out, closing the door behind him. He made his way towards Flynn and stood next to him, their shoulders touching.

"Hey, I thought I was supposed to be the miserable looking one out of the two of us but looking at your face now, you're giving me serious competition." Without looking up, Flynn smiled a small smile. "It's not easy going back is it, especially after what we talked about last night" Aaron said in a quiet voice. Flynn shook his head. "I knew when I woke up this morning it would be difficult but I didn't think I'd feel like this. Leaving this time is so much harder than last time we were here." Aaron moved and stood in front of Flynn. He unfolded Flynn's arms and cuddled him, holding him close. Flynn hugged him back, drinking in the freshly showered scent of his boyfriend. Aaron said nothing for a few seconds before offering what he hoped would be words of comfort. "Look, I know it'll be hard for both of us but now we know we want the same thing, we can make plans, look forward to our future and like you said last night, we'll make it happen. Until then, things will be just like they were before we came away which, as far as I remember, were pretty good weren't they?" Flynn looked at him and smiled. "Yeah, they were, they are. Anyway, I thought I was supposed to be the one who talked sense, not you." Aaron smiled at him. "Well, it's being with you for so long isn't it, some of your sense was bound to rub off on me eventually." Flynn pressed his lips against Aaron's, kissing him tenderly, Aaron's stubble gently scratching his face as he kissed him back. "Thanks for putting everything back into perspective again."

"No problem. Ready to go?" Aaron asked. "Yeah, suppose so" Flynn said as he pushed Aaron gently away from him. "Here, better have this back then seeing as we're heading back to reality" he said handing Flynn his phone. "Cheers" said Flynn switching it on and putting it in his pocket. They took a final look at the cottage before getting into the car and setting off. With the right choice of music and Aaron's constant chatting, it didn't take long for Flynn's mood to pick up and by the time they arrived back in the village, you'd never know how down he'd been feeling a few hours before. Chas had spotted them getting out of the car and made her way up to see them.

"Hey, look at the colour of you two, you'd think you'd been abroad, did you have a good time?"

"Yeah, it was great" Aaron said "couldn't have been better."

"Good, pleased to hear it. So, are you going to show us your white bits then?"

"Mum" Aaron said pulling a face.

"What, I wasn't talking to you, I was talking to Flynn."

Flynn grinned at her. "Well, if I had any, I'd gladly show them to you but unfortunately, I don't."

"Oh, right" Chas said looking slightly shocked.

"Well we were in the middle of nowhere, there was just me and Aaron and it's not like he hasn't seen it all before is it?" he said with a straight face. Aaron turned his head away hoping his mum wouldn't see the smile he was struggling to hide.

"No, I suppose not" Chas said, her mind conjuring up a picture she really didn't want to see. Seeing his mum's face, Aaron couldn't keep a straight face any longer. "Mum, he's winding you up" he said. Chas laughed. "Yeah, course he is, I knew that. Anyway, I'll be in the pub if you fancy a pint, my shout."

"Ok, we'll see you in a bit." As she walked away, Aaron looked at Flynn and smiled. "You're good. Not many people leave my Mum stuck for words. How did you manage to keep a straight face?"

"Dunno but I nearly lost it when I saw you look away."

"See, it's not so bad being back is it?"

"No, it's fine." Flynn grinned at him.

"Right, I'll just take this bag in and then we'll go get that pint before she changes her mind." Paddy was pleased to see them both and joined them in the pub for a pint and a chat. Flynn only stayed for one. He and Aaron were going to meet in Bar West later that night and he wanted to get home and unpack first. They had enjoyed the peace and quiet of their week away but they were both in need of going somewhere that had loud music and a pool table.

Aaron was the first to arrive. He had a quick look for Flynn as he made his way to the bar but he couldn't see him. He checked his watch and saw that he was five minutes early so he decided to get the drinks in knowing Flynn wouldn't be long. The bar was crowded and he enjoyed listening to the constant drone of noise and the little snippets of conversation that he heard as he waited to be served. He ordered their drinks, tapping his fingers to the music that was playing in the background. "Alright" said a voice that wasn't Flynn's. Aaron turned to see the guy with the green eyes smiling at him. "Alright" he said a bit warily but not wanting to seem rude.

"You're looking tanned, been away?"

"Yeah, just got back today."

"I wondered why you hadn't been around. On your own are you?" the guy said taking a sip of his lager.

"Er, not for long, I'm meeting someone."

"Oh right. I'll leave you to it then" he said and disappeared into the crowd. Out of sight of Aaron, he smiled. So they were both going to be here tonight. Great, he'd waited long enough, it was time to get the ball rolling and start what he hoped would get him what he wanted. Back at the bar, Aaron paid for the drinks and turned to see Flynn making his way through the crowd towards him. They smiled as they saw each other and kissed as they met. Flynn looked great and smelt fantastic and, although it had only been a few hours since he'd seen him, Aaron was as pleased to see him as if they hadn't seen each other for days. They took their drinks and fought their way through the crowds looking for a table. Luckily for them, a couple were just leaving so they grabbed their table and sat down. They liked this place, it was somewhere they enjoyed being. There were a couple of other gay bars which were ok but this was their favourite. After all, it was the place where it had all began for them. As they were talking, Aaron saw the guy with the green eyes again. He was standing in front of a mirror, a fair distance away and he seemed to be watching them. Aaron decided there and then that there would be no more Mr Nice Guy, something about that bloke was giving him the creeps. If he came anywhere near him again, he would just tell him to get lost. Flynn noticed the change of expression on Aaron's face and was concerned.

"Hey, what's up?"

"What? Oh, nothing."

"Aaron" Flynn said, a sterner tone to his voice.

"It's just some guy. He spoke to me at the bar the other week when I was here with Adam and again tonight when I was waiting for you."

"Got yourself an admirer have you?" Flynn said smiling. "That'll be the lighting in here. Once he sees you in daylight, he'll soon change his mind."

"Well you didn't did you? Anyway he's standing over there and I swear he's watching us."

"Is he now, so, which one is he then?" Flynn asked as he turned his head to look behind him.

"That's weird, he's not there anymore."

Flynn turned back to look at Aaron. "Maybe it just seemed like he was watching us. I mean, there's a lot of people in here, he could have just been trying to find his mates or waiting for them to come back from the bar or something."

"Yeah, I suppose so." Aaron still felt slightly uncomfortable but thinking about it logically, why would the guy want to watch them? He barely knew Aaron and he didn't know Flynn at all. Flynn's explanations made much more sense. He'd just got the wrong end of the stick as usual.

In the toilets, the guy with the green eyes looked at himself in the mirror. Happy with what he saw, he took a few deep breaths before turning and leaving. As he made his way through the crowds, he felt a mixture of excitement and nerves. He'd thought about this moment for a long time, played it out in his head over and over and now it was finally going to happen. He wondered what sort of reaction he would get. Aaron glanced up and saw him walking towards them. He tried not to change the expression on his face this time, hoping that he was just going to walk right past them and keep going but he didn't. He stopped next to their table and ignoring Aaron completely said in a quiet voice "Alright Flynn, long time no see." Aaron thought for a minute he was hearing things. How did he know Flynn's name? He looked at Flynn and watched as his body stiffened and the colour drained from his face. Flynn turned his head slowly and looked into a face that he hadn't expected to see ever again, the face of the man he had once loved and who had broken his heart a couple of years before. "Bet you weren't expecting to see me again. So, how are you, you look great." Flynn swallowed, trying to keep his composure, a mixture of emotions running through him all at once. In a dull monotone, eventually he managed to speak. "What do you want Matt?" he said. Aaron sat bolt upright once he heard the name, his jaw dropping. There was only one Matt that had featured in Flynn's life as far as he knew and that was his ex. Surely this wasn't him, it couldn't be, could it? He didn't even live round here any more. He held his breath, flicking his eyes between Matt and Flynn, not sure what was going to happen next.

In the same quiet tone and with a shy smile, Matt said "I was hoping we could talk."

Flynn shook his head. "Talk? After what you did, why would I want to talk to you? In fact, why would I even want to see you, never mind talk to you?" Flynn looked at Aaron, an expression on his face that Aaron couldn't quite read. So, this was him, the man that had betrayed Flynn's trust and shattered his confidence, whose actions had left a lasting effect on Flynn, the consequences of which he had had to deal with. Aaron went into full protection mode staring at Matt, a steely look in his eyes and a scowl on his face letting Matt know exactly what he thought of him but Matt never took his eyes off Flynn.

"I know this is a shock but if you'd just give me a few minutes.." He looked briefly at Aaron before looking back at Flynn again.

Aaron softened his features and looked at Flynn. He didn't want to do this but it seemed like the right thing to do. He at least had to make the offer. "Do you want me to go? I could go and get us a couple of drinks, give you two a few minutes.."

"No Aaron" Flynn said firmly, taking hold of Aaron's hand. "You don't need to go anywhere." He turned to look at Matt. "I'm not interested in hearing anything you've got to say and I said everything I needed to the last time I saw you so why don't you disappear back under whatever rock you crawled out from and leave me alone." He looked back at Aaron fixing his eyes on him, almost like he needed to anchor himself to him in some way and breathed deeply. Aaron squeezed his hand and smiled at him and he smiled back. Matt took a deep breath before speaking again.

"I guess I deserved that but just so you know, I've moved back to the area. There aren't that many gay bars around so we're going to bump into each other at some point. I just thought it would be easier for both of us if we cleared the air. At least think about it, please."

Flynn put his eyes down towards the table and shook his head. Without another word, Matt turned and walked away. Aaron looked up and watched him go, able to see his face reflected in the mirror that he had been standing in front of earlier. He couldn't believe his eyes as the sincere expression that had been on Matt's face a few seconds ago disappeared and was replaced by a sly smile. What was he playing at? Why had he decided to come back now? What had been the point of approaching him that night with Adam and earlier tonight and starting a conversation? He had a hundred questions in his head but he pushed them all away. Right now, Flynn needed all his attention, his feelings were all that mattered. Without letting go of Flynn's hand, Aaron shuffled around on the seat until he was sitting next to him.

"Are you ok?" he asked. "Yeah, I'm fine why wouldn't I be?" Flynn said a bit sharply.

"Because you've just seen your ex for the first time since you broke up." Flynn just shrugged.

"Flynn, it's ok to be a bit freaked out, who wouldn't be?"

Flynn looked at Aaron's concerned face and in a more normal tone of voice said "I'm not freaked out, just shocked that's all. I didn't think I'd ever see him again, let alone have to speak to him." Aaron couldn't believe what he was about to say but he was trying to think about what was right for Flynn. Casting aside his own misgivings about Matt, he stroked Flynn's hand with his thumb as he spoke. "He might have a point you know, about talking to each other."

"You what?"Flynn said staring at him. Aaron swallowed and carried on speaking. "There's not that many places we can go to as a couple and if he is back in the area like he said he is, we will keep seeing him. You seeing him tonight is bound to bring stuff back to you and I know what can happen if you bottle things up. If you don't clear the air, every time we see him there'll be an atmosphere. A few minutes of your time, that's all it would take, then if you still want to tell him to do one, you can. What do you say?" Flynn knew that what Aaron said made sense. Although at the moment he felt alright, at some point, there would be a reaction to seeing Matt again, old wounds reopened, stuff to deal with but he wasn't ready to say so just yet. He needed time to get used to the idea of Matt being back first before he could think about talking to him. "Ok, I'll think about it." Aaron leant forward and kissed him briefly on the lips. As he went to pull back, Flynn stopped him and kissed him again, a longer, harder kiss this time, his arm snaking across Aaron's stomach, his hand gently moving up and down from Aaron's hip to his thigh and back again as they both lost themselves in the moment. "Right, it's your round I think" Flynn said as he smiled at Aaron.

"What, you want to stay?"

"Yeah, course I do. You see, I'm on a date with this really fit bloke and I think, with one more drink, I might be able to get him to come back to mine with me so, you see, I can't leave can I?" Aaron grinned at him. "Right, I'll be back in a few minutes then." As he went to the bar, he thought about what had just happened. He could only imagine what Flynn must be feeling like, what a shock it must have been seeing Matt again after all this time but, now that the initial shock had worn off, Flynn seemed ok. Whatever he wanted to do, Aaron would back him 100 per cent. His thoughts turned to himself. He didn't feel threatened by Matt's return, he knew Flynn loved him but there was something about Matt that he didn't like, that he didn't trust and it had nothing to do with what he had done to Flynn when they were a couple. It was to do with that smile as he walked away. It made him feel uneasy, like there was something else going on other than just him wanting to make things right with Flynn but what could he do, he had no proof, just a gut instinct that there was more to Matt than met the eye. Still, if Flynn wasn't going to let his return have an impact on their evening, then neither was he. He collected their drinks and went back to Flynn. They enjoyed the rest of their evening together, it was just like any other night out that they had shared. After finishing their drinks, they decided to go back to Flynn's but Aaron needed the toilet first. As he was washing his hands, he heard the door open and looking in the mirror above the sink he saw Matt's face looking back at him. Aaron stared at him with narrowed eyes, his trademark scowl firmly in place. He dried his hands and turned around to face him.

"Oh Aaron, don't look like that. You didn't honestly think I was interested in you did you? I mean, you're attractive enough in your own way I suppose but I've got standards and you simply don't reach them. I just needed to see what I was up against, that's all, size up the competition." Aaron shook his head. "Look, I'll be honest with you, I want Flynn back and when you look at what I can offer him, compared to what you can, well, there's only one choice isn't there? And I usually get what I want, one way or another." Aaron could feel the adrenaline running through him as he took a couple of steps closer to Matt.

"Really, is that supposed to be some sort of threat because if it is it isn't working" he said, his face inches away from Matt's. "Even if he wasn't with me, if you think after what you did to him, he'd go back to you, then you don't know him half as well as you think you do." For a split second, the expression on Matt's face changed, as if Aaron had touched a nerve but then virtually instantly, the arrogant expression returned.

"So he told you about that. Well, what can I say, I thought I could have my cake and eat it. I made a mistake and it cost me big time but, like I said, I realise now what I lost and I want him back and I'm used to getting what I want." Aaron looked into Matt's eyes, raised his eyebrows and smiled.

"Yeah well not this time pal. See, he's with me now so you can want him back all you like but he doesn't want you or did you not hear what he said to you back there. He wants me. It's me who's going home with him tonight, me who'll be waking up next to him tomorrow morning and me that he's spending his time with. That's the way it is now and that's the way it's going to stay so you better get used to it." He barged past him without a backwards glance. Left alone in the toilets, Matt stayed where he was for a few seconds, thinking about what Aaron had just said. Suddenly, he swung his fist and punched the toilet door. He wasn't used to people standing up to him, telling him how it was going to be, that didn't happen. That's what he did to others not what they did to him and as for the thought of Flynn sleeping with Aaron, it made him feel sick to the pit of his stomach. He calmed himself down and gathered his thoughts. It was early days, Flynn would talk to him at some point, he was sure about that and then, after they'd spoken, he would know where he stood and what he needed to do.


	38. Chapter 38

**These characters belong to ITV and Emmerdale. **

As the taxi made it's way through the streets towards Flynn's house, they both sat in silence, neither feeling the need to speak. Flynn was surprisingly relaxed, smiling at Aaron whenever he caught his eye, looking forward to spending the night with the guy he loved. Aaron's state of mind wasn't so good. Now that the adrenaline had worn off, Matt's words were going round and round in his head and he was surprised at how much they unnerved him. It wasn't so much what Matt had said about wanting Flynn back, it was the certainty with which he had said it, like it was a foregone conclusion, it was going to happen no matter what. Also, although he hated to admit it, he knew what Matt had said about what he could offer Flynn was true. Matt dressed well, obviously had his own place, money, probably a decent job and what did he have? A room in someone else's house and a job in a village garage earning not a great deal. He didn't even have his own car, ironic considering he was a mechanic. It was hard to believe that twenty four hours ago they were talking about living together, they didn't have a care in the world and now there was a dark cloud called Matt looming on the horizon threatening to spoil everything. His thoughts were interrupted by a movement to his side as Flynn leant forward to pay the taxi driver. They got out of the taxi and went into Flynn's house, Aaron trying to push aside the disturbing thoughts that had occupied his whole journey. Harrison and his girlfriend were watching TV in the living room so they said hello to them, chatted for a few minutes and went into the kitchen. They had a drink and something to eat before heading up to Flynn's room.

By the time Aaron had finished in the bathroom, Flynn was already undressed and sitting up in bed watching TV. Once Aaron started undressing, Flynn wasn't interested in what was on TV anymore. He still got just as much of a thrill from seeing Aaron with no clothes on now as he did when he first saw him naked.

"I know you did that on purpose you know" Aaron said, stepping out of his jeans and leaving them on the floor, his white boxers making his tan look even darker.

"Did what?" Flynn asked, his face a picture of innocence, unlike his thoughts.

"Used the bathroom first just so you could lie there and watch me get undressed" Aaron replied as his t shirt and socks were removed and put on top of his discarded jeans.

"I don't know what you're talking about" Flynn said grinning at him. Aaron smiled back but Flynn knew his boyfriend well enough by now to know when something was troubling him. With his boxers on, Aaron climbed into bed next to Flynn and cuddled up to him. They lay there in silence watching TV, Flynn gently stroking Aaron's back, feeling the warm air on his chest as Aaron breathed. He decided he would give Aaron a few minutes to see if he would tell him what was bothering him. If he didn't, then he'd ask him. He didn't have to wait long. In a quiet voice, Aaron said "Can I ask you something?"

"Course, you know you can."

"It's about you and Matt." Flynn stopped stroking Aaron's back and breathed deeply. He'd hoped that Matt's return hadn't been what was bothering Aaron, especially after he had heard him telling Matt to do one but thinking about it, what else could it be?

"What about us?" he said quietly.

Aaron moved away from Flynn and sat up next to him. He looked at him knowing this was going to be uncomfortable for both of them but he needed to say it and he needed to hear Flynn's response. "You know nearly everything about me and Jackson but I don't know hardly anything about you two. All I know is that he was your first proper boyfriend and you split because he cheated on you."

"So what more do you want to know?" Flynn asked his heart beating a bit quicker as he waited for Aaron to answer him. Aaron paused for a minute, struggling to find the right words. "It didn't matter before, me knowing so little because he wasn't around but now he's back I need to know more so there's no surprises and I'd rather hear it from you. Well, if I'm honest, I'd rather not hear it at all but at least I know if I hear it from you, it'll be the truth." Flynn looked at Aaron's serious face, his blue eyes looked so sad, the discomfort he was feeling plain to see. Flynn took a deep breath and nodded. He switched the TV off and put the remote on the bedside table.

"Ok I'll tell you but there's not a lot to tell. We, er, we met in Bar West funnily enough. He came over and started talking to me, we swapped numbers but I didn't think he'd ever call. I mean, I never thought someone like him would be interested in me." Aaron closed his eyes, held them shut for a couple of seconds and opened them again. He hated hearing Flynn put himself down like that, it wasn't right. He'd be a great boyfriend for anyone. "Anyway, he called the next day, we went out that night and it went from there. We laughed all the time, he had a great sense of humour and we just hit it off. After a couple of months, we did the whole meet the parents thing, I thought things were going well. Then, after we'd been together seven, eight months, Nick turned up here unexpectedly one night. I knew from his face something was wrong. That's when he told me he'd seen Matt kissing someone else and saw them drive off in his car." Flynn paused, obviously struggling with recalling difficult memories and Aaron wasn't exactly enjoying listening to them. He could see how much this still hurt Flynn but he needed him to finish his story.

"So, what happened next?" he asked, his voice barely audible.

Having regained his composure, Flynn carried on. " He phoned me the next day, we met up and he acted like nothing had happened. I waited to see if he was going to say anything but he didn't. We started to argue about little things then about a week later, we arranged to meet up. We went to the country park for a walk and I just asked him if it was true and he said yes. He said it only happened once but that I didn't need to worry because they'd used condoms, like that made it ok. We argued and cried and argued a bit more then I finished it. He kept phoning, sending texts but I wasn't interested, I couldn't trust him ever again. After a while they stopped and then I heard he'd moved away so that was that." He looked at Aaron and smiled a small smile at him. "Told you there wasn't much to tell." Aaron smiled a small smile back. So now he knew about the relationship but what about Matt as a person? If he was going to have to fight for Flynn at any point, which he would do without batting an eyelid, he needed to know what he was up against. "And what's he like, as a person I mean." Flynn looked at Aaron with an uncomfortable look on his face. "Aaron, please. Do we have to do this?" he said, putting his head down and fiddling with the duvet. He really didn't want to talk about Matt anymore. "Flynn, I need to know. It's important or I wouldn't be asking. Besides, he can't be that bad, I mean, you used to love him." Flynn looked up at Aaron.

"Yeah used to being the operative words then he cheated on me. Doesn't that tell you all you need to know? Look, he was fine with me but I was his boyfriend so he would be wouldn't he? He wasn't so nice to others but I didn't find out until we were finished. He was used to getting his own way though, I remember that and he had a bit of a temper on him." Instantly, Aaron's hackles were up. "He never hurt you did he?" he asked, concern etched on his face. Flynn shook his head. "Not physically, no. Look Aaron, you're not seriously worried about him being back are you?" Aaron looked away from Flynn for a second and then looked back into the kindest eyes he knew, hating the fact that their evening had taken such a serious turn because of him. "A bit, wouldn't you be?" Flynn thought for a few seconds before answering, trying to put himself in Aaron's position. Would he be worried if the situation was reversed? Yeah, course he would be, even if it was an irrational worry. He turned slightly and held Aaron's hand in his. "Yeah, I probably would be but you've got nothing to worry about, I promise."

"What if he wanted you back? What would you say?"

Flynn was shocked to the core. By rights, he should be tearing strips off Aaron for even asking whether he would be interested in Matt again, for doubting his feelings for him after everything they'd been through and the length of time they'd been together but looking at Aaron's face, he just couldn't be angry with him. All he saw when he looked at him was his boyfriend looking as worried as he'd ever seen him look and he hated it.

"I'm not interested in Matt or anyone else, Aaron. I just want you. You're the only one I want to be with and one of you is worth an army of him." Aaron tried to swallow the lump that was lodged in his throat, blinking away the tears that were threatening to fall.

With his free hand, Flynn gently stroked Aaron's cheek, never taking his eyes off him. Aaron's heart was pounding as Flynn moved towards him, all his tension beginning to melt away as Flynn kissed him softly. There was no mistaking the sincerity of Flynn's words when he spoke about how he felt about him and at that moment, Aaron felt like the biggest idiot ever for even thinking that Flynn might be tempted by his ex. Flynn pulled back slightly and they looked at each other, their feelings shown clearly on their faces. "Him coming back makes no difference to me, it makes no difference to how I feel about you and it never will." He put his arms around Aaron and pulled him towards him. Aaron held him so tightly, Flynn found it hard to breathe. "I love you so much" Aaron whispered as he nuzzled Flynn's neck. "And I love you too, just as much." Flynn knew from Aaron's whole demeanour that his words had hit home but actions always speak louder than words. As he kissed Aaron again and started touching and caressing his body, he made his mind up that by the time they went to sleep, Aaron would be in no doubt just how much he wanted him and how strong his feelings for him were.

When Aaron woke up the next morning, he stretched and snuggled back down under the duvet. What the hell had happened to Flynn last night? He'd been a man on a mission that's for sure, not that he was complaining, and if he was sending him a message about how he felt about him, Aaron got it loud and clear. He grinned at the memory and turned to find himself alone in bed. He lay there, hoping Flynn was ok. After five minutes, he began to panic slightly. What if he'd had a chance to think about him questioning him and was annoyed? What if he resented him for making him talk about Matt, for making him confront painful memories that maybe he wasn't ready to talk about? Downstairs in the kitchen, Flynn put some bread in the toaster and thought about the previous night. It was weird seeing Matt again but he didn't feel like he thought he would feel. It was a shock, that went without saying. He still looked good, still had the same smile that used to melt his heart but he didn't feel attracted to him anymore. In fact, it was strange for him to think that they had once been a couple. It almost didn't seem real. As the toast popped up and he buttered it, he thought of Aaron. Now there was someone he was attracted to, who he wanted to be with forever but he was worried about him. Matt had obviously got to him more than he thought. As he carried the tray of food upstairs, he hoped he'd done enough to get rid of Aaron's fears over Matt being back forever. He pushed the door open with his foot and found Aaron looking at him. He smiled at him and Aaron smiled back.

"So, you're awake then? Half the morning's gone, lazy git."

"Yeah well, I was up half the night."

"I know, so was I, remember?" he said as he gave the tray to Aaron to hold while he hopped back in to bed beside him. Aaron didn't want to bring the mood down again but there was one more thing he needed to say to Flynn.

"Look about last night, what we were talking about."

Flynn sighed. "Aaron, it's done. I've told you what you wanted to know, I don't want to talk about him anymore."

"Alright, I get it. I just wanted to say thanks, I know it wasn't easy."

"Well, I never can resist you when you look at me the way you do but don't even think about putting it to the test until I've eaten something, I'm starving." Aaron gave him a quick kiss before taking a bite of toast. "Don't worry, I need to get some energy back myself before I think about trying anything." They spent the day together and when Aaron returned home that night, he felt better, more secure. So Matt was back, it didn't have to be a problem unless he let it become one. So why, deep down, did he still feel so uneasy?

After work the next day, Aaron tried to get hold of Hazel but she'd gone away for a week. He was disappointed, he wanted to tell her about the holiday. He missed talking to her when she wasn't around but at least if she had gone away somewhere, it showed she was back to herself again. He tried to get hold of her a week later and this time, he was in luck. He asked her about her week away and told her about his and Flynn's holiday.

"Sounds like you had a whale of a time" Hazel said.

"Yeah, we did."

"So, when am I going to have to go and buy this posh frock and hat then?"

Aaron laughed. "You don't give up do you?"

"No, and besides, you haven't fed me the we're too young line yet so, come on, don't keep me waiting, spill."

"Ok, I suppose I can tell you but only cos you're so far away, there's no danger of you telling anyone. While we were away, we had a chat about the future and stuff and we talked about living together. It's what we both want so, it's not a wedding but maybe one day, who knows?"

"Oh Aaron, that's fantastic. I'm so pleased for you, for both of you."

"Yeah well, it's only talk at the minute. We can't do anything about it until Flynn leaves college and starts working."

"Yeah but even so, it's exciting, you've got something to look forward to. There's nothing stopping you."

"I know" Aaron said putting his head down, his expression changing.

"Aaron, I know that look, what's up?"

Aaron shook his head. "It's nothing, I'm just being stupid."

"So what's new? Come on, out with it."

"It's just me and Flynn were out the other week and we bumped into Flynn's ex. He's moved back to the area."

"And…..

"And we had words and he told me he wants Flynn back."

"At the risk of sounding like a stuck record, and…." Aaron looked at Hazel with a frown on his face.

"Didn't you hear what I said, I said he wants him back."

"Yeah and I want David Beckham as my plaything but it ain't gonna happen. So he wants him back, it can't happen unless Flynn wants to go back to him. He adores you, Aaron, there's no way he would leave you for anyone. What's this really about, this isn't like you."

Aaron took a deep breath before he carried on. "There's just something about his ex that I don't trust. He's so sure of himself. He came over all sweetness and light asking if him and Flynn could talk, clear the air. Flynn told him no so he left but as soon as he turned away, his whole expression changed and he had this smug look on his face. I'm trying not to think about him but I can't help it."

"Have you talked to Flynn about him? What does he say?"

"He says he's not interested, he just wants to be with me."

"So what are you worried about then? You've just said you want to live together, he can't make much more of a commitment than that can he?"

"No, I suppose not." He looked up as his bedroom door opened, a big grin breaking out on his face when he saw Flynn.

"No need to ask who's just arrived" Hazel said.

Flynn came over and kissed Aaron before sitting down next to him. "Hi Hazel, how are you?"

"I'm fine love. How are you, you're looking well."

"I'm good thanks."

"Aaron's just been telling me all about your holiday."

"Yeah, we had the best time didn't we?" he said looking at Aaron, keeping his eyes fixed on him a bit longer than necessary before looking away. Aaron nodded his head smiling. "Shame we had to come back really."

"Well that's the thing about holidays, you always have to come back."

"True. Anyway" he said turning to Aaron placing his hand on Aaron's thigh and squeezing it gently. "I just thought I'd let you know I'm here. I'll wait for you downstairs, no need to rush." He turned back towards the computer screen. "See ya Hazel, take care of yourself."

"I will, you too." Flynn smiled and went back downstairs.

"Right, let me tell you something right now. You have got nothing to worry about Aaron, trust me. Didn't you see the way he just looked at you? I'd kill to have someone look at me that way. Just forget about whatever his name is. Go and spend some time with Flynn and give him a hug from me."

"I'll try, and thanks Hazel."

"You're welcome. I'll talk to you soon."

Aaron shut the computer down. What was happening to him? Why were Matt's words still needling him? Why was he so bothered about his attitude? Somehow, he'd got right under his skin and Aaron didn't like it one bit.


	39. Chapter 39

**It's a bit of an epic, this chapter, but hopefully you'll enjoy it.**

Lying on the sofa in his brand new apartment, Matt studied the photo he had found when he had moved in and unpacked his stuff a few weeks ago. He looked at the smiling faces of the two young good looking lads looking back at him, remembering the night the photo had been taken. He and Flynn had gone to a party. They'd gone outside to get some fresh air and he'd told Flynn for the first time that he loved him. He remembered the look on Flynn's face as he took a few seconds to digest what he had just heard before he had told Matt that he loved him too. That was how he wanted Flynn to feel about him again, how he wanted him to look at him again, not the way he'd looked at him the other night and he was going to do everything in his power to make sure it happened. The problem was that since that night in Bar West when he had let Flynn know he was back, he hadn't seen him again. He'd been in Bar West and the other gay bars a few times in the last few weeks but there had been no sign of Flynn or his irritating boyfriend. It was like they had disappeared off the face of the earth. In order for his plan to work, he had to at least see Flynn and this wasn't happening. It frustrated him enormously. Playing a waiting game was not his thing, he preferred action but it looked like for the time being at least he had no choice. Tonight, he was going to Bar West again. Hopefully, Flynn would be there and he could finally begin to do something about getting him back.

Flynn stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist. He walked across the landing to his room and sat down on the bed. They'd been back from their holiday for three weeks now and they hadn't been back to Bar West since the night that Matt had announced his return. He'd suggested it twice and both times, Aaron had come up with a reason for them not to go. The first time, he'd said that he wasn't feeling very well and he'd had no reason not to believe him. They'd spent the evening cuddled up on the sofa watching DVD's which wasn't a problem, any time he spent alone with Aaron was fine by him but the second time he suggested it and Aaron had given him another reason not to go, he began to feel that something wasn't right. That time, Aaron had said he was too tired, he just fancied a quiet pint. They'd gone to the Woolie for a couple but then, when he'd said he was going home so that Aaron could get an early night, Aaron had got the right hump and stomped out of the pub with him following wondering what he'd done wrong. Tonight, he was going to ask him again to come to Bar West with him and if he got turned down for a third time, then he would know for certain that something was up. He dialled Aaron's mobile and waited for him to answer it.

"Alright, I was going to phone you later." Aaron's cheerful voice was a welcome thing for Flynn to hear.

"Yeah well looks like I've saved you the trouble. Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, you?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Listen, do you fancy going to Bar West tonight?" Flynn waited with baited breath to hear what Aaron would say, hoping he would agree and then he could stop worrying. On the other end of the phone, Aaron pulled a face and looked towards the sky. It was the question he had been dreading and the whole tone of his voice changed as he answered Flynn.

"Oh, well, I'd like to but I'm a bit short of cash at the moment."

Flynn's heart sank and he shook his head as his suspicions were confirmed. Aaron was definitely coming up with excuses not to go to Bar West but he wasn't going to give up that easily.

"Well, I'm sure I can manage to buy us a couple of pints each. It doesn't have to be a heavy session. I know you've got to get up for work tomorrow."

"I don't know, I'm not sure what time I'll be able to get away from here, we're up to our eyes in it."

"Come on Aaron, we haven't been there for ages" pleaded Flynn.

Aaron's voice became a bit angrier as he replied "Well, I can't help it if we're busy can I?"

"No you can't, and if that was the real reason why you couldn't come out with me, I wouldn't mind but it isn't is it?" Flynn said, raising his voice too.

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"You know exactly what it means, you're avoiding the place and we both know why." Aaron didn't want to argue but he just couldn't help himself as his sarcastic side came to the fore.

"Do we? It must be great being you, able to see what's going on in my head without me having to say anything."

"Why are you being like this?"

"Like what? You seem to think you know what I'm thinking so why don't you tell me why I'm being like this."

"Ok then I will, you don't want to go to Bar West in case we bump into Matt." There was silence on the other end of the phone. "If I'm wrong Aaron, please feel free to tell me."

"Like I'm bothered about him" Aaron said, the distaste in his voice plain for Flynn to hear.

In a quieter voice, Flynn said "Well, prove it then. Meet me at Bar West tonight usual time."

Aaron went quiet. He'd thought he'd been quite clever with his excuses, making sure they were believable, not too far fetched but Flynn knew him too well. It wasn't that he didn't want to go, he loved going out with Flynn, he just didn't want Flynn anywhere near Matt.

"So, are you going to meet me or what?" Flynn asked again.

"I don't know, like I said, we're busy" Aaron said, sticking to his most recent lie.

"Fine, well you know where to find me if you can be bothered to drag yourself away."

"What, you're still going?" Aaron asked amazed.

"Yeah, I am. You might be prepared to let Matt interfere with our lives but I'm not. Like I said, you know where to find me." Flynn ended the call and threw his phone on to the bed. He hated arguing with Aaron, he could count on one hand the number of times they'd fallen out but this situation with Matt had to stop. He thought he'd done enough to convince Aaron that he wanted to be with him, that he had nothing to worry about but obviously he was wrong. If Aaron still had a problem with Matt, why wasn't he talking to him about it instead of pretending everything was ok? Surely, if either of them should be bothered by his return it should be him but he wasn't concerned so why should Aaron be? For the first time that he could remember, he got dressed not looking forward to going out. He didn't want to be out on his own, he wanted to be with Aaron. He hoped that Aaron would think about what he'd said and meet him but, with Aaron, you just never knew.

Aaron put his phone back in his pocket and kicked the tyre of the car he was working on. He rested his hands on the car roof and put his head down, waiting to calm down. He couldn't believe he'd just had an argument with Flynn, he couldn't even remember the last time they'd had a cross word never mind a full blown argument. He thought about what they'd said to each other. Flynn was right, of course, he had been avoiding going to Bar West and it was in case Matt was there. He just wanted to keep Flynn anywhere where Matt couldn't get to him but realistically, he knew that was impossible. It wasn't that he didn't trust Flynn because he did but he didn't trust Matt at all. Even now, he could still hear his words, see that smug little smile and he hated him. Cain came round the corner and seeing Aaron's face knew something was wrong.

"Everything ok?" he asked.

"Yeah, everything's fine" Aaron replied.

"Well you might want to tell your face that then because it's telling me a different story."

"Just leave it Cain, alright, I've said I'm fine" Aaron snapped, turning to start work on the car again. Cain decided not to push it, leaving him to get on with it. Aaron never spoke for the rest of the time he was there and, when he was told he could leave for the night, he left without saying a word.

As he pulled open the door of Bar West, Flynn felt as nervous as if this was a first date. He looked around, hoping to see Aaron but he wasn't there. What if he didn't turn up just to teach him a lesson? He could be so stubborn when he wanted to be and Flynn had really put him on the spot. If that was the case and he didn't show, he wasn't at all sure what he would do next. He was a few minutes early so he went to get himself a drink. It was busy so he had to wait to be served. On his way out of the toilets, Matt couldn't believe his eyes when he saw Flynn standing on his own at the bar. He quickly scanned the rest of the club looking for Aaron and was pleasantly surprised not to see him. That meant he was probably on his way though so he would have to be quick. He walked over and stood next to Flynn.

"Alright" he said smiling at him. Flynn looked at him and looked away again.

"Still getting the silent treatment am I? Very mature. So I guess there's no point in me asking if you're ready to listen to what I've got to say." Flynn stood in silence, chewing on his bottom lip, trying to get the barman's attention.

"Flynn, this is ridiculous, how long are you going to keep this up? We're supposed to be adults. We need to have this talk, you can pretend all you like that we don't but we do. This atmosphere isn't good for any of us." The barman appeared in front of Flynn at that moment and he ordered a bottle of lager, still not acknowledging Matt at all.

"D'you know what, fine, if you want to behave like a child, you carry on but at least I tried to make things right." When Aaron and him had had their little chat, Aaron had told him he didn't know Flynn as well as he thought he did. Well, he reckoned before he could count to five, Flynn would call him back. Time to put it to the test. As he walked away, he silently counted in his head one…two…three… four… "Matt wait" he heard. He smiled to himself. He loved it when he was right. Maybe he did still know Flynn pretty well after all. Wiping the smile off his face, he turned around and walked back to Flynn, waiting for him to speak. Flynn looked at him with a serious face.

"Look, maybe you're right, maybe we do need to talk but you can't expect it to happen straight away. You've been gone a long time and you can't just turn up here and expect me to be ok with you or what happened between us because I'm telling you now I'm not." Matt looked at the anger in Flynn's eyes and with as much sincerity as he could muster, he answered him.

"I know and I don't expect you to be. In fact, I don't expect anything. All I want is the chance to talk, clear the air, that's it."

Flynn looked at him. He didn't know if he could trust him, if he meant what he said, but he knew he was right, they did need to talk. Flynn nodded. "Ok, just not yet, I'm not ready to talk to you yet."

"I understand. Why don't you give me your number and I can call you, sort something out."

Flynn gave Matt a withering look. "Me give you my number, I don't think so."

"Ok, then take mine, you can call me whenever you're ready." The barman returned with Flynn's drink and put it down in front of him.

"Let me get this" Matt said.

"No" Flynn snapped "I'll buy my own." He paid the barman and took a quick drink. He wasn't sure if taking Matt's number was a good idea but, at least if he took it, he was in control of when they spoke, it would be when he was ready and on his terms.

"Fine, I'll take your number but then you have to leave me alone until I'm ready" he said taking his phone out of his pocket and quickly typing in the number that Matt gave him.

"Right" Matt said smiling at him "time for me to leave. Places to go, people to see. See you around." Matt left Bar West feeling like he was walking on air. Now things were moving. The next step would be their conversation, then he would know if he could get him back. If not, well, he'd think about that if and when it happened.

Still standing at the bar, Flynn thought about what he'd just done. Although he didn't want to admit it, Matt being back was having an impact on him and Aaron. It shouldn't be but it was and the fact that he was here on his own tonight was proof of that. If he could talk to Matt, listen to him, then tell him what he thought of him, he could go back to Aaron and tell him it was all sorted. He would never have to talk to him again and him and Aaron could get on with their lives in peace. He looked at his watch, the one Aaron had bought him and was anxious as he saw it was twenty to eight. Aaron was rarely late so this wasn't looking good. He was too nervous to stand still so he went over to the pool table. There were a couple of lads there that he knew who were playing pool so he went to talk to them. He had a couple of games and finished his drink then he checked his watch again. It was eight fifteen. His heart sank. Aaron wasn't coming, he had stood him up. Now what was he going to do?

"Winner stays on" said a voice behind him. Flynn's heart leapt as he turned round to see Aaron smiling at him. "I'm sorry I'm late, the bus broke down and we had to wait for a replacement and I couldn't get a signal on my phone." Flynn smiled at him. "I thought you'd stood me up."

"As if" Aaron said as he hugged Flynn before kissing him briefly on the lips. "Come on, I'll get us a drink." Sitting at a table with their drinks, Flynn looked at Aaron. "I really thought you weren't coming you know."

"I know, I could tell by your face. I'm sorry, for being late and for earlier on. I shouldn't have spoken to you like that."

Flynn leant forward resting his hands on the table.

"I don't understand Aaron. I thought after we spoke the other week that you'd see nothing had changed, that it would reassure you that Matt being back isn't a problem but it doesn't seem to have worked."

"No it has worked, honest it has. Look, I'm an idiot ok. I just let him get to me and I shouldn't have. So, am I forgiven?"

"I suppose so just don't let it happen again alright." Aaron leant across and kissed Flynn.

"I won't" he said. They spent a pleasant couple of hours playing pool and chatting before heading back home.

A couple of days later, Flynn was waiting in Smithy Cottage for Aaron to have a shower and get changed. He was sitting at the table with a mug of coffee in front of him when Paddy came in.

"On your own then?"

"Yeah, Aaron's gone to make himself look beautiful."

"You could be in for a long wait then" Paddy said smiling. Flynn smiled back at him.

"Actually, I'm glad you're on your own, I wanted to talk to you." Flynn looked at Paddy's concerned face and waited to hear what he was going to say.

"You can tell me to mind my own business if you like but is everything alright, between you and Aaron I mean, only he's been a bit quiet and he just doesn't seem himself."

"Has he said something to you?" Flynn asked.

"Don't be daft, course he hasn't. I just know something's not right."

"I know what's bothering him. My ex boyfriend has moved back to the area and it's really unnerved him."

"Oh, I see."

"He came up to us in Bar West, asking if me and him could talk, you know, clear the air. It wasn't an amicable break up so I told him I wasn't interested and sent him packing. For some reason, it's just really got to Aaron and I don't know why."

"Does he need to be worried?"

"No, course he doesn't" Flynn snapped. "Paddy, you know how much I love him and so does he. I've told him plenty of times what I think of him. We spoke about Matt being back and I thought he was ok now."

Paddy sat down next to him. "Maybe the problem is, he knows you and your ex haven't spoken yet and until you do, it's always going to be hanging over you both. If you had the chat and got it out of the way, he might feel better."

"Do you think so?"

"Who knows this is Aaron we're talking about but if you've tried everything else…"

Flynn nodded. "Guess I need to make a phone call then."

Flynn sat in the car park at the country park waiting for Matt. He'd phoned him the next day and arranged to meet. Matt had wanted him to go to his place but he'd insisted on it being on neutral territory and here seemed like as good a place as any. He felt sick, just as sick as he'd felt when he told Aaron that he was meeting Matt for a chat. He could tell Aaron wasn't happy about it but he'd reassured him that he was just going to listen to what he had to say, get a few things off his own chest and that would be an end to it. He heard a car pull in to the car park and saw that it was Matt. He took a deep breath, got out of the car and waited for Matt to join him.

"Well, this brings back memories" Matt said as he walked over to him. Flynn could smell his aftershave as he stood next to him, it was the same one he used to wear when they were seeing each other and it instantly transported him back in time.

"Yeah well, it seemed as good a place as any" Flynn replied as they started to walk through the trees.

"I'm glad you phoned. I know it can't have been easy."

"Like you said, we need to clear the air."

They walked until they came across one of the picnic benches. They sat down opposite each other, an awkward silence between the two of them.

"We never used to have a problem talking to each other did we?" Matt said.

Flynn shook his head. "No, we didn't."

Matt had gone over and over in his head what he was going to say to Flynn but, now that the time had come, he couldn't remember a word of it. He felt extremely nervous, more than he thought he would but it was because so much depended on this conversation. He looked Flynn in the eyes.

"I'm really sorry Flynn. For what I did and for ruining everything we had. You didn't deserve that."

"Why did you do it? That's all I want to know. You told me you loved me and then you do that to me."

Matt sighed. "I did love you but I was young, you were even younger. Part of me just wanted to have some fun, live a bit so when he came onto me that night, I just let it happen. I wasn't drunk, I can't use that as an excuse, I knew what I was doing but I also knew straight after that I'd made a mistake. I told him it could never happen again and it didn't, not with him or anyone else."

Flynn swallowed the lump in his throat. So, he had his answer, it had been nothing to do with him or anything he'd done, it was Matt's selfishness that had done it, destroyed their relationship.

"What was his name?"

A look of confusion came across Matt's face. "Sorry?" he said.

"You keep saying him or he, you never used his name. What was it?" Flynn asked again.

Matt put his head down. "I don't remember. Does it matter?"

Flynn looked at him like he was something nasty he'd just walked in.

"Does it matter? Do you have any idea what you did to me? You destroyed my confidence, made me think it was my fault, that I'd done something wrong, that I wasn't good enough for you. You ruined my life for one night with someone and you can't even remember his name so yes it does matter."

Matt looked at Flynn, at the anger and hurt in his eyes as they glared back at him and for the first time since he had moved back, he began to doubt whether he could get Flynn back. In a quiet voice, he said "I had no idea you went through so much. I knew I'd hurt you but I didn't realise you blamed yourself for what happened."

"What else was I going to do? You were my first proper boyfriend, something made you do it so why wouldn't I think there was a problem with me?"

"There was never a problem with you. You did nothing wrong. What happened was my fault. I had something special with you and I didn't realise until it was gone, until you were gone. That's why I came back."

"You what?" Flynn said stunned at what he'd just heard. Matt sighed before carrying on speaking.

" I made a mistake Flynn. I've had relationships since we split but they've never felt completely right. That's when I knew I had to come back and talk to you, try to put things right." He put his hand on top of Flynn's. "I still have feelings for you and I need to know if you've still got feelings for me."

Flynn pulled his hand away and just stared at Matt. He hadn't known what to expect from this meeting but it hadn't been this. It looked like Aaron had been right to be wary of him. He hadn't just wanted to clear the air after all.

"Well say something" Matt said.

"I don't know what to say."

"Just be honest, I've been honest with you."

"Why would you think I would still have feelings for you after what you did?"

"Because I know you loved me and those feelings never quite go away." Flynn looked at Matt's face. There was a time when he had loved him that was true but not anymore. When he looked at him now, he felt nothing. It surprised him a bit, he thought he might still feel something but he didn't.

" I don't feel anything for you anymore, whatever there was, it's gone. I'm with Aaron now, I love him."

"I see. So you and Aaron, how serious is it then?"

"About as serious as it gets. Look, all I needed to know was why you cheated on me and now I've got my answer. I've moved on and you need to do the same." He got up and walked away, leaving Matt sitting at the table. He left the car park feeling ten times better than when he had arrived. He drove back to Emmerdale to tell Aaron what had happened. He found him locking the garage up for the night. Aaron looked up as Flynn was walking towards him. He was a bag of nerves, not knowing what Flynn was going to say to him but the beaming smile Flynn gave him went some way to calming him down.

"Hey gorgeous" Flynn said as he gave Aaron a kiss. They kissed for longer than they usually would in public but neither of them cared.

"So, how'd it go?" Aaron asked sitting on the bonnet of a car. Flynn sat down next to him.

"Ok actually. It was difficult at first but, as he started speaking, I realised that I didn't care what he had to say. I just needed to know why he did what he did."

"And did he tell you?"

Flynn nodded and repeated to Aaron what Matt had said to him.

"Muppet" Aaron spat out.

"You're not wrong there. Still, at least now I know that it wasn't my fault, I can forget all about blaming myself in some way." Aaron smiled at him. He didn't want to ask the question he had in his head but he had to.

"So, did he say anything else or was that it?"

"No, he said something else. He said he still had feelings for me and he asked if I had any feelings left for him."

"I knew it. So what did you say?"

Flynn turned towards Aaron. "I told him that I had no feelings for him at all anymore and that I loved you and he'd have to move on."

"Bet that went down well."

Flynn shrugged. "Don't care. The important thing is he knows where he stands now and that the situation's not going to change. He's not going to be a problem anymore."

Aaron leant forward and kissed Flynn again. "Fancy a pint?" he asked smiling at him.

Flynn smiled back. "For starters, yeah."

Matt stayed where he was for at least an hour. So, now he knew. He had no chance of getting Flynn back. Flynn loved Aaron and had no feelings for him whatsoever. That was hard to take. If Flynn had said he hated him, that was something to work with, after all there's a fine line between love and hate but to say he had no feelings for him at all, he hadn't been expecting that. He'd told Flynn the truth and it had got him nowhere. His sorrow had now turned to anger and it was aimed in one direction only. If he couldn't have him, he was going to make damn sure that that horrible little cretin he was with at the moment wasn't going to have him either. He'd rather see Flynn on his own or with anyone else other than with him. He didn't like the idea of Flynn being hurt but he'd get over it eventually. He got up and made his way back to the car. He had some thinking to do. He wasn't exactly sure what he was going to do yet but the idea of being a puppet master, pulling someone's strings and then sitting back watching events unfold really appealed to him.


	40. Chapter 40

As Flynn pulled up outside Aaron's place, he couldn't believe how quickly time was going by. He'd been back at college for a couple of weeks now but he didn't mind because every week that went by took him closer to getting his degree and getting a job. Then, he and Aaron could finally find somewhere to live and move in together. Even Matt hadn't been a problem. Him and Aaron had seen him a few times since their chat and he'd smiled at them, said hello and left them alone, spending his time with his own group of friends. It was brilliant that that horrible atmosphere between them was gone and they could both get on with their lives. He knocked on the door of Smithy Cottage and waited to be let in. Paddy opened the door and smiled at him.

"Alright Paddy" Flynn said as he walked into the kitchen. Aaron was standing with his back to the sink, arms folded, one leg crossed over the other and he didn't look very happy. Flynn looked at him wondering what was the matter.

"Am I glad to see you" Paddy said "sort him out will you, he's had a face like a slapped backside since he came in from work. Even my best jokes haven't made him crack so much as a smile."

"Yeah well that's because even your best jokes still aren't funny" Aaron said pulling a face.

"See what I mean? I'll leave you to it" Paddy said to Flynn before smiling at Aaron as he walked past him. Aaron smiled sarcastically back at him before going back to looking serious again. Flynn walked over and stood next to him. "What's up grumpy?" he said. Aaron just looked at him.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"There's nothing to talk about. Cain's been on my back all day and when I got back here, he started" Aaron said nodding his head towards the other room where Paddy was now sitting. "I just wanted some peace and quiet but he wouldn't take the hint. And, before you say anything, no I don't want you to go and no I don't want to be on my own."

"Ok so what do you want to do?" Flynn asked. Aaron just shrugged.

"Right, why don't we go to the cinema? You don't have to say a word, you just have to sit there and I won't have to look at your miserable face because it'll be dark." Aaron very nearly smiled but just stopped himself. "Don't know what's on" he said sulkily.

"Well there's eight screens, I'm sure we can find something to watch." Flynn leant sideways against Aaron and lowering his voice said "I'll even let you hold my hand if you're very lucky." In spite of himself, Aaron couldn't help but smile.

"Aah, that's really sweet but then how would I eat my popcorn?"

"Oh I see, nice to see where your priorities are" Flynn said smiling at him.

"Are we going then or what?" Aaron said walking over to pick up his keys. They shouted their goodbyes to Paddy and left. Flynn drove and within twenty minutes they were there. It was one of those complexes where there was a couple of restaurants and a pub as well as the cinema so the car park was quite full. They found a space and started walking back towards the cinema. Aaron put his hands in his pockets and stopped.

"What's up?" Flynn asked.

"Can't find my wallet, I think I must have left it in the car. Give us your keys, you go in and have a look at what's on and I'll be back in a minute." Flynn handed over his keys and Aaron ran back through the car park to the car. He opened the passenger door and saw his wallet on the floor. He picked it up and, with a sigh of relief put it in his pocket before locking the door again.

"Well, well, isn't this a pleasant surprise?" said a voice behind him. Aaron took a deep breath before turning around to face Matt, keeping his face as expressionless as he could. "I suppose I ought to say congratulations on your victory, you won, you got him but I don't really feel like being very sporting."

"You make it sound like some sort of competition between me and you with Flynn as the prize."

"Well it was wasn't it?"

Aaron shook his head. "I told you he wouldn't go back to you, I didn't have to do a thing. He's got a mind of his own."

"Oh, I'm well aware of that but I wouldn't be too smug if I was you. There'll always be something between us because me and him shared something you and him won't ever be able to share. I was his first Aaron and you always have a thing about your first." Aaron's blood ran cold as he was instantly transported back to that hospital room, to him sitting on the end of Jackson's bed that night when Jackson had said virtually those exact words to him. Of all the things that Matt could have said to him, that was the one thing he couldn't argue with because it was true. There was a part of him that still loved Jackson and always would. Yes, it was tucked away deep within him and it was different to the love he felt for Flynn but it was still there so why wouldn't a part of Flynn still love Matt?

"So where is he then?" Matt asked jolting Aaron back to reality. Aaron said nothing.

"It's a secret is it? Dangerous things, secrets. They have a habit of coming back when you least expect it. Have you ever noticed that Aaron?" Aaron began to feel a little bit uncomfortable. He wasn't sure where this was leading and he didn't know if he wanted to find out.

"Yeah well me and Flynn don't have any secrets so, much as I'd love to stay and chat, I've got better things to do." He went to walk away but Matt wasn't finished.

"Well, you've got nothing to worry about then have you? Still, I'm surprised he told you about that thing in the Kingfisher, that's not an easy thing to own up to. Anyway, I won't keep you. Have a good night." He walked across the car park towards the restaurant where his mates were waiting for him. He couldn't help but smile to himself because Aaron hadn't got a clue what he was talking about. He'd hidden it well, he'd give him that, his face hadn't given him away at all but his eyes had. He'd took a chance mentioning it but he'd had an idea that Flynn wouldn't have said anything and yet again, he was right.

Aaron stood rooted to the spot as he watched Matt walk away. He felt sick. He had absolutely no idea what he was talking about and what was even worse was that Matt knew he had no idea what he was talking about. He felt like an idiot. What could it be that Flynn hadn't told him? How bad was it that he'd kept it secret? A chill wind blew across the car park making him shiver.

"Hey, what's keeping you, we've already missed the start of one film. Haven't you found it yet?" Flynn's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Yeah, I've got it" he replied.

"Oh, great, that's a relief." Flynn's smile dropped as he saw Aaron's face. "Aaron, what's wrong?"

"I've just seen Matt."

"Oh right, what did he want?" Flynn asked.

Aaron stared at Flynn for a few seconds before saying "What's the Kingfisher?" He watched the colour drain from Flynn's face as he looked down at the ground.

"The what?" he asked.

"I said what's the Kingfisher and what happened there" Aaron said menacingly.

Flynn shook his head. "I can't believe he mentioned that."

"Yeah well he did and didn't he enjoy it too knowing that I hadn't got a clue what he was talking about."

Flynn had never seen Aaron so angry, the vein on the side of his neck was throbbing, his chest was rising and falling as his breathing increased and his eyes never left his for a second. Aaron's eyes, usually full of warmth were like pools of ice. His own heart was thumping as he realised he had no option but to tell Aaron the truth. "Ok, get in the car and I'll tell you" he said. They sat in the car both trying to gather their thoughts. Eventually, Aaron broke the silence with one word. "Well?" he said.

In a quiet voice, Flynn said "The Kingfisher was a nightclub in Manchester, I only went there once. It was one of Matt's mates birthday and a group of us went out and we ended up there. There were about eight, ten of us, something like that. Anyway, someone took out some tablets, pills, whatever you want to call them. Everyone took some and so did I."

"Drugs! You took drugs, are you mental?" Aaron shouted.

"No, course I'm not mental. I did it once because I didn't want to be the odd one out." Flynn looked at the look of disgust on Aaron's face and he felt like a little child who'd let his parents down in the worst way possible. "Don't look at me like that, I'm not proud of it I know it was stupid."

"Stupid? No, having too much to drink when you have to get up for work the next day is stupid, taking that crap is way beyond stupid." Aaron turned his head away. It was like he was learning about a completely different person. "I can't believe I'm hearing this. You don't even smoke but you took drugs."

"I told you it was once, it's not like I was an addict. Besides, it was so bad, I swear I never touched anything ever again and I never will. That was the night where I got this" he said touching a small scar a couple of centimetres long on his forehead just below his hairline.

"You told me that came from falling down the stairs."

"It did come from falling down the stairs, just not the stairs at home." Aaron opened the window to let some fresh air in and took some deep breaths. There weren't many times since he'd been with Flynn that he was lost for words but this was one of them. He looked back at Flynn, struggling to marry up the Flynn he knew with the one he was hearing about.

"I asked you to tell me everything about you and him so there'd be no surprises and you told me you had."

"Well, it happened so long ago, I'd forgotten all about it until you just mentioned it. Besides, it's not exactly something you can just drop into a conversation is it?"

"You lied to me."

"Oh come off it Aaron are you trying to tell me that I know everything that you did before we met cos I bet you I don't do I?" Aaron looked away, thinking about some of the things he'd done when he was growing up, what he'd done to Paddy and Jackson while he was struggling with who he was and he shook his head.

"No, I thought not. Look, I don't want a full confession of all your past sins, I don't care about what happened before. Everyone has a past, we've all done stupid things and maybe I should have told you but what would have been the point? If he hadn't have come back, you'd be none the wiser. I'm just sorry if you were going to find out that it was the way you did."

Aaron looked at Flynn, his anger slowly disappearing as he saw how hurt and guilty his boyfriend looked. "Is there anything else I need to know, any other little gem he might throw back in my face at some point because if there is, you better tell me now?"

Flynn looked into Aaron's eyes. "There's nothing else, I swear. You know everything now."

"I better do cos I'm telling you Flynn if he tells me something else…."

"He won't because there isn't anything else to tell."

"Right, we'll leave it at that then"Aaron muttered.

They both sat in silence for a while each unsure what to do next. Flynn reached out and put his hand on Aaron's leg. Aaron turned his face towards him.

"So, are we ok then?" Flynn asked.

"Yeah course we are" Aaron replied, smiling at him. He just wished he felt as sure as he sounded.

That night, as he lay in bed, Aaron couldn't sleep. Matt's words kept going round and round in his head. What he'd said about how you always have a thing about your first really got to him. He hadn't been prepared for that at all or for how vividly that memory of him and Jackson came back to him. He remembered how the hospital room had smelt when they'd had that conversation and which nurses were working that night. All those years ago and yet it was like it had happened yesterday. When he closed his eyes, his mind conjured up images of Flynn and Matt together. He knew it was stupid, it wasn't like he hadn't known they'd slept together but hearing Matt say it somehow made it seem more real and the fact that he was the first person Flynn had slept with made it worse. He knew what you had to feel for someone to take that step, it wasn't something you did lightly. Also, he couldn't get his head around Flynn taking drugs at all, even if it was only once. He thought he knew him so well, knew the sort of person that he was, knew everything about him but clearly he didn't. What else was there he didn't know? Flynn said he knew everything now but he'd told him that a few weeks ago and it wasn't true. How could he believe him now? Some time after three, he eventually fell asleep. The next day, he was in a foul mood. Flynn phoned him and he ignored the call. He didn't want to speak to him until he could sound like everything was alright. He phoned him back an hour or so later and told him he'd been driving, that's why he hadn't been able to speak to him. They chatted for a while before Flynn suggested they went out on the following Saturday and he agreed.

That Saturday night, Aaron and Flynn were sitting in Bar West having a drink. Flynn had been surprised when Aaron had said that's where he wanted to go but he was just happy to be out with him so he went along with it. At the same time, they both saw Matt come in with a couple of mates.

"Great, just what we need" Aaron said "I'm telling you he better stay away from me tonight cos I'm really not in the mood."

"Look, why don't we go somewhere else?"

"Why should we?"

"Because we're not going to have much fun with him in here are we? Look at you and he's only just walked in."

"I'm fine. I'm going to get us another drink." He stood up and walked to the bar leaving Flynn feeling anxious. He hoped Aaron wasn't going to do anything stupid. After a couple of minutes, he became aware of someone approaching the table and thinking it was Aaron looked up.

"Alright" Matt said.

"You've got a nerve. I don't know what little game you think you're playing but it isn't going to work" Flynn said.

"You what?"

"Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about. You're the one who banged on about being mature and behaving like adults then you go behind my back and tell tales like a little kid."

Matt smiled. "Aah, I see. I don't know what he's told you but he said you didn't have any secrets and all I said was that I was surprised you'd told him about the Kingfisher thing. How was I supposed to know that you hadn't said anything?"

"Look, me and Aaron are a couple and we're staying that way. I'm sorry if you don't like it but that's the way it is."

"Fine, it's no skin off my nose" Matt said walking away. So, Flynn wasn't going to be talking to him again anytime soon but, on the plus side, Flynn and Aaron had obviously had some sort of row or Flynn wouldn't have felt the need to say what he had done. Now, he just needed to build on what he'd started. He'd sown that first little seed of doubt in Aaron's head, time to sow another one.

The rest of Aaron and Flynn's evening was a bit awkward. Flynn was a bit edgy and Aaron was a bit moody but they both tried hard to relax and enjoy themselves. It got to about 9.30 and Flynn had had enough.

"D'you fancy going somewhere else, I've had enough of this place."

"Yeah, alright. We'll just finish these" Aaron replied. Matt watched them with interest. What a contrast to how they had been when he had watched them before. Then, they could hardly keep their hands off each other. He watched as Aaron finished his drink, said something to Flynn then got up and walked towards him. Aaron saw him and barged right into him making Matt spill his drink all over himself. Aaron smiled and carried on walking into the toilets. Matt followed. He'd love to smack Aaron but the hurt wouldn't last that long plus he could get himself into trouble and he wasn't worth that. No, he had a better way of upsetting him. When he got into the toilets, Aaron was washing his hands.

"Sorry about that, I really should watch where I'm going" he said.

"Ninety quid this cost and you've spilt drink all over it, you little prat" Matt said. Aaron smiled. "Like I said, it was an accident."

Matt took his t shirt off and stuck it under the hand dryer trying to dry it out. Luckily, he'd only been drinking water but it was soaked. Aaron stood transfixed, unable to move, his eyes fixed on Matt's torso. There, looking back at him was an exact duplicate of Flynn's tattoo, same size, same colour, same position on his body, identical in every way.

"What are you doing with a tattoo like Flynn's?" he said quietly.

"We had them done at the same time, didn't he tell you? I thought you two didn't have secrets."

"No" Aaron said shaking his head "he got his done when his Nan died."

Matt burst out laughing. "Is he still sticking to that story, I'm impressed. Still, I suppose when you tell a lie often enough, you start to believe it don't you?"

"What are you talking about?"

"We had them done when we went away for a weekend. Flynn knew his parents would freak if he came back with a tattoo for no reason but they couldn't complain if it was a tribute to someone could they?"

"No, no, I don't believe you. Flynn wouldn't do that."

"Wouldn't he? A little while ago, you wouldn't have believed that he took drugs but he did" he said putting his t-shirt back on. "There, good as new, luckily for you" he said as he left Aaron alone with his thoughts.

Flynn was watching anxiously as Matt came out of the toilets. He went in looking for Aaron.

"Everything ok?" he said. "I saw him come in after you." Aaron just looked at him before pushing past him without saying a word. "Aaron? Aaron!" Flynn called after him as he followed him through the club but Aaron didn't stop. Out in the street, Flynn ran to catch up with him and pulled Aaron's arm forcing him to turn round. "What's happened, will you just talk to me" he shouted.

"I don't want to talk to you."

"Why, what have I done?" Flynn asked.

"How could you? I thought you'd done a really nice thing and it was all a lie cos you didn't have the balls to tell your parents the truth."

"Ok, I don't have a clue what you're talking about."

Aaron poked Flynn hard on the chest where his tattoo was. "I'm talking about your tattoo, the one that was supposed to be a reminder of your Nan. Why didn't you tell me that you and Matt had tattoos done at the same time? I wouldn't have minded. You didn't have to make something up."

Flynn was getting angrier by the minute. "I didn't make anything up, what I told you was the truth. Do you honestly think I'd lie about something like that? Look, I don't know anything about Matt having a tattoo like mine, the last time I saw him with no clothes on, there was no tattoo."

Aaron winced at the thought of Flynn and Matt together and put his head down.

"You don't believe me do you?" Flynn asked.

Aaron's silence spoke volumes. He wanted to believe him but he'd seen the tattoo for himself. It did exist and Matt had been proved right about Flynn taking drugs.

"Well, so far, he hasn't been the one telling lies" he said quietly.

"Great, so you think that little of me that you'd rather believe his word over mine. Thanks, thanks a lot" Flynn said as he turned and walked away.

"Flynn, wait, don't go. I'm sorry alright" Aaron said but Flynn just kept walking. Aaron wanted to run after him, tell him he believed him, make everything alright between them again but he couldn't make his feet move. He just watched as Flynn disappeared from his sight.


	41. Chapter 41

The next morning was grey and miserable and matched Aaron's mood perfectly. He'd managed to get himself dressed but that was it. He couldn't face food and he definitely couldn't face talking to anyone so he'd shut himself away in his room. There was only one person he wanted to talk to and that was Flynn but he obviously didn't feel the same way. As he lay on his bed thinking about the night before, he couldn't believe the mess he and Flynn now found themselves in. He'd phoned him four or five times last night and each time it had gone straight to voicemail. He'd left messages every time but Flynn hadn't got back to him. He picked up his mobile and held it, willing it to ring or beep with a message but it stayed silent. With a heavy heart, he dialled Flynn's number again. It rang and rang for what seemed like an eternity before he heard Flynn's voice asking him to leave a message. He couldn't think of anything to say that he hadn't already said the night before so he just hung up as a solitary tear trickled down his cheek. He wiped it away with the back of his hand as he heard a knock on his bedroom door and Paddy came in.

"I've brought you a brew" he said as he put the mug down on the bedside table. Aaron just about managed a smile as Paddy sat down on the edge of the bed and put his hand on Aaron's arm rubbing it gently.

"Don't suppose there's any point in asking if you want to talk about it is there?" he said. Aaron didn't respond. "Ok but you know I'm here if you need me." Aaron nodded his head and smiled at him. Paddy got up and left him alone. Downstairs in the kitchen a few minutes later, Paddy sat with his own mug of tea and worried. He had no idea exactly what the problem was between Aaron and Flynn but he'd heard enough last night to know it was serious. He'd woken up last night when he'd heard the front door slam and hadn't meant to listen but he couldn't help it. He'd heard Aaron apologising, saying what an idiot he'd been, begging Flynn to call him back, to talk to him and it had torn him apart. He hated hearing Aaron so sad. Him and Flynn were so right for each other, made each other so happy and, from a purely personal point of view, he liked Flynn a lot and had got used to him being around. He hoped whatever it was that had happened, they could sort it out and quickly too. He finished his tea and was on his way to put his mug in the sink when he heard a knock on the door. He raised his eyes to the ceiling and silently said thank you as he went to open it. He couldn't stop his face from falling when he saw Adam standing there.

"Alright Paddy, is he in, I need to ask him a favour. I've tried phoning his mobile but he's not answering."

"Er, it's not really a good time right now, can I get him to phone you back later?"

Adam looked at Paddy, a confused look on his face. "Yeah, course you can. He's alright though isn't he?"

Paddy glanced over his shoulder and looked up the stairs before motioning for Adam to move backwards, closing the door behind him.

"Him and Flynn have had some sort of bust up. He's hardly slept, he's not eaten anything today and he's not speaking either."

Adam pulled a face. "Oh no, you're kidding. Those two never fall out."

"I know, that's what worries me. I thought you were Flynn, you know, come to sort it all out."

Adam smiled. "So that's why you didn't look too pleased to see me. Look, don't worry about getting him to call me, he's got more important stuff to deal with. I hope they'll be alright."

"Yeah, you and me both" Paddy said.

From where he was standing at the window in his room, Aaron watched as Adam and Paddy talked. From their serious faces, he guessed they were talking about him and Flynn but he didn't have the energy to care, he had more important things to worry about. He'd hoped when he'd heard the knock on the door that it was Flynn ready to talk to him. He'd shot up off the bed praying that when he got to the window he'd see Flynn's car parked outside but he didn't. He moved away from the window as Adam and Paddy were saying goodbye hearing the front door open and close as Paddy came back in. About an hour later, Paddy brought Aaron some lunch and took away the mug of tea from earlier which was now cold and untouched. Aaron looked at the food and couldn't face it. He lay back down on his bed, put his headphones on and listened to some music hoping it would provide some sort of relief.

Later that afternoon, there was a quiet knock on the door. If Paddy had have been in the other room instead of the kitchen, he probably wouldn't have heard it. He opened the door to see Flynn standing there, hands in his pockets looking as serious as Paddy had ever seen him.

"Alright, is Aaron in?" he asked.

"Yeah, course he is, come in" Paddy replied.

"Cheers" Flynn said stepping in to the tiny hallway. "How's he doing?"

"Looking at your face, about as well as you are" Paddy said. Flynn managed a small smile.

"Why don't you go up, he'll be dead pleased to see you."

Flynn looked up the stairs before looking back at Paddy. "Er, no, I won't, not this time. Will you just tell him that I'm here please."

"Yeah, ok then. You go in and wait for him." Flynn went into the kitchen and sat at the table as he heard Paddy's footsteps going upstairs. Paddy took a deep breath before knocking on Aaron's door. He went in and saw Aaron lying with his eyes closed. He shook him gently. Aaron opened his eyes and took his headphones off.

"Flynn's here" Paddy said.

The sense of relief that flooded through Aaron was immense. He sat up and looked at Paddy.

"Well send him up then."

"I tried, he won't come up. He wants you to go downstairs."

Aaron's face fell, his initial feeling of relief now replaced with a feeling of dread. "Oh, right, I see. I'll be down in a minute then" he said.

"Hey, he's here, that's the main thing" Paddy said before heading back downstairs again. Aaron sat on the side of the bed with his head in his hands trying to compose himself. What was he going to face when he went downstairs, was he about to lose the most important person in the world to him? There was only one way to find out. He stood up and made his way slowly downstairs.

"Alright" he said when he saw Flynn.

"Yeah, you" Flynn replied.

Aaron just nodded.

"Right, I'm going out. I'll be gone for ages, probably won't be back til really late tonight" Paddy said looking at Aaron then at Flynn. Neither said a word. He grabbed his coat and with a final look at both of them went out, closing the door behind him. The silence was deafening as they both looked at each other.

"Do you want a drink?" Aaron asked in a quiet voice.

"No thanks, I'm not stopping long" Flynn replied.

"Oh, I see" he said as he sat down at the table next to Flynn.

"I just wanted to give you these" Flynn said holding out two photos.

"What are they?" Aaron asked. Flynn resisted the urge to sarcastically state the obvious.

"If you look at them, you'll see."

Aaron looked at the two pictures. The first one was of Flynn and Matt on a beach somewhere, the second was a picture of Matt on his own. He looked like he'd just come out of the shower, he had a towel wrapped round his waist and his hair was wet. Aaron looked up at Flynn and shook his head. "I don't understand, what am I supposed to be looking at?"

"The first one of me and him was taken when we went away for the weekend. That was the day we came back, the date's on the photo. We had to leave the guesthouse early but we didn't want to go home straight away so we went to the beach for a while."

Aaron looked at him blankly.

"Look at the photo Aaron, have a good look."

Aaron looked at the photo again, hating having to look at Flynn and Matt looking so happy together. He stared at it for a few seconds before he realised what it was Flynn wanted him to see. In the photo, they were both only wearing shorts. Flynn's tattoo was clear for him to see but Matt's chest was completely bare. He looked at Flynn with a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. Flynn sat expressionless, just looking back at him.

"The second one was taken just before we split, that's got a date on it too."

Aaron looked at the picture, knowing what he would see or in this case what he wouldn't see. Again, Matt's chest had no tattoo. He dropped the photos on the table and looked at Flynn.

"I'm so sorry, I don't know what to say."

"Yeah well, there's not a lot you can say is there? Nearly eighteen months we've been together, Aaron. Do you have any idea how much it hurt that you didn't believe me, that you'd rather believe him?" Aaron shook his head. "I just wanted you to see that I was telling you the truth." Flynn stood up and went to walk past Aaron towards the door.

"Flynn , please, don't go. I swear I'll never believe another word he says. If he tells me it's raining, I won't believe it until I go outside and get wet."

Flynn stopped and turned around. Aaron looked as bad as he felt. "It's not as simple as that though is it?"

"I know. Please, stay for a drink, let me try to explain and if when I'm finished, you still want to go, then I won't stop you." Flynn looked at Aaron's face, at his eyes pleading with him to stay and he knew he couldn't just walk away.

"Ok, stick the kettle on then" he said smiling a small smile at him. Aaron smiled back as he went to take the mugs out of the cupboard. Now he had to tell Flynn the truth about everything Matt had said to him and how it had made him feel. It wasn't going to be easy but he knew he had no choice.

Flynn took the last sip of his coffee as he tried to digest what Aaron had just told him. He'd sat in silence letting Aaron speak, not wanting to interrupt him. He looked at Aaron who was waiting for him to say something.

"I can't believe he said all that stuff to you, messed with your head like that. Why didn't you tell me all this before?"

"Cos I felt stupid for letting him get to me and it would have meant admitting to you that even after all this time, I still struggle sometimes to believe that I'm good enough for you, well for anyone really. Plus, it's hard to ignore something that's true. What he said about what he can give you compared to what I can is spot on. He can give you everything you deserve and I can't."

Flynn reached out and took Aaron's hand in his.

"What I deserve is to be with someone who loves me, someone I can trust and who will never hurt me and that's you. I've told you so many times how I feel about you, I've tried to show you what you mean to me but I'm out of ideas here. I don't know what else I can do to convince you so if you can think of something then tell me, please, and I'll do it."

Aaron looked at Flynn and wished he could think of something that Flynn could do but there wasn't anything.

"You can't do any more than you have done already. This is something in my head and I'm the only one who can sort it out." Aaron took a breath before carrying on. "I thought when you came round here today, you were going to tell me that was it."

Flynn smiled at him. "Look, I was hurt, I was angry with you but ending it, no especially now I know the full story."

Aaron leant over and kissed him. "You know you could always show me again what I mean to you, it might help me sort my head out."

"Well, if you think it'll help, I can't really say no can I?"

When Flynn left later that night, Aaron felt a lot better. Things between him and Flynn were back to normal, he'd got everything off his chest and he was determined that this time he would sort his head out once and for all.

The following week, Flynn had had to go away for a few days. They'd arranged to meet in Bar West the day Flynn got back. He was just walking up the road towards it when his mobile rang. It was Aaron.

"Hey, what's up?" he asked "You better not be calling to cancel on me cos I'm here now."

"Cancel, no chance but I am going to be late."

"Great, well how late?"

"Half an hour or so. I'm sorry but it couldn't be helped."

"Ok, just get here as soon as you can. I missed you."

"I missed you too. See you in a bit."

Flynn pushed open the door and went in to Bar West. Half an hour wasn't too long to wait. He walked up to the bar and ordered a drink before looking around. Sitting at a table on his own was Matt. He looked like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders. Flynn knew he should keep away but he had to say something, he wanted to know why he'd said what he had to Aaron. He walked over and stood next to the table. Matt looked up surprised to see Flynn standing there.

"Why did you lie to Aaron about the tattoo?" Flynn asked.

"Because I enjoy winding him up. He makes it so easy. I don't even have to try that hard."

"That lie could have split us up. Do you really hate me that much?"

"You know I don't hate you at all. It's him I can't stand."

"What's happened to you? You never used to be like this."

"You really want to know? Ok I'll tell you. For the first time in my life, I can't have what I want and I hate it and I hate him because he's got what I want and he doesn't deserve it. He's not good enough for you."

Stunned at the venom in Matt's voice, Flynn sat down. "What gives you the right to say who's good enough for me and who isn't? You don't know anything about him."

"I don't have to, I know all I need to know just by looking at him."

"So what were you thinking? That you'd try and split us up? Then what, I'd come running back to you and we'd live happily ever after."

Matt shook his head. "No, I know you'd never do that but at least he wouldn't have you either. That's why I had the tattoo done. You had yours done to remind you of someone special that you lost, well so did I."

"Matt, this has got to stop, it's not right. You need to move on."

"And what if I can't, what then?"

"You have to find a way. You've got no choice."

Matt looked at Flynn's face, looked into his eyes and before Flynn knew what was happening, Matt leant forward and kissed him. Flynn pulled back and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he shouted.

"I just had to make sure there was nothing left and I can tell by your face that there isn't. I'm sorry." He got up and left the bar leaving Flynn sitting there in shock thinking had that really just happened? He heard his phone ring and saw that it was Aaron. He took a deep breath before answering.

"Hi, where are you?"

"About five minutes away, get us a beer in will you, save me wasting time standing at the bar when I get there."

"Yeah, no problem, see you soon." On his way to the bar, Flynn had to think quickly and he decided not to tell Aaron about what had just happened. With all the problems Matt had caused and how insecure he'd been feeling, this would be the last thing he'd need to hear. No, it would be better if he just kept quiet. When Aaron arrived, Flynn was so pleased to see him that he threw his arms around him and kissed him with a force that took Aaron's breath away. They stayed for a couple of drinks and then went back to Aaron's place. As they were undressing, Flynn noticed Aaron looking at him.

"What?" he said.

"You seem a bit quiet, everything ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, just a bit tired that's all."

Aaron went up to him and started massaging the back of his neck. "Wow, these muscles are tense. Come on, lie down, let's get them relaxed or you'll never sleep."

Flynn smiled at him as he let Aaron lead him over to the bed. As Aaron's fingers worked on his aching neck and shoulders, he began to think that maybe he'd made a mistake in keeping quiet. Maybe he should just tell Aaron what happened but this was different to Matt telling a few lies. What if Aaron lost his temper and smacked Matt one or what if he didn't believe him and thought it was something he'd wanted? He decided to sleep on it, see how he felt in the morning and then take it from there.

When he woke up the next day, he still couldn't make his mind up about whether to tell Aaron or not. For every reason he came up with for telling him, he could think of another one for keeping quiet. The rest of that week him and Aaron hardly saw each other so it looked like the decision had been made for him. Now if he told him, Aaron would want to know why he hadn't told him straight away, why he'd kept his mouth shut. He had no choice now but to say nothing. The next couple of weeks passed by without incident. They didn't see Matt at all and Aaron was secretly hoping that he'd moved away again but one night in Bar West, he came in with a couple of his mates looking suntanned so he'd obviously just been on holiday. Matt watched as Aaron and Flynn chatted and laughed, they looked like they had done that first night he'd watched them, like they didn't have a care in the world. His two mates, Phil and Tom looked at each other and shook their heads.

"Look at him, he's horrible. What's Flynn thinking of?" Matt said with a sneer on his face.

"I think he's quite cute actually, I wouldn't mind being Flynn" said Tom. Matt gave him a withering look.

"Matt, let it go mate" Phil said "he's not interested. He doesn't want to be with you, he wants Aaron, they're happy together and after what Aaron went through with his last boyfriend, he deserves some happiness."

"What d'you mean, what he went through?"

"Aaron was seeing this lad, nice guy, always smiling, a bit of a cheeky chappie. Anyway, he had a really bad accident and ended up paralysed from the neck down. Rather than do a runner like most people probably would, Aaron decided to stay with him. They used to come in here sometimes. The way Aaron looked after him, well I don't think I could have done it, no matter how much I loved someone."

"So what happened, they're obviously not together now are they?"

"He died, some sort of infection he was too weak to fight."

"That's terrible."

"So maybe Aaron's not as horrible as you think he is. Sometimes, mate, you have to know when to quit."

Matt took a mouthful of beer and looked over at Aaron and Flynn. Who'd have thought that someone who looked like Aaron could be the sort of person that Phil had just described. He watched as Aaron kissed Flynn and headed towards the toilets. He looked at the smile on Flynn's face as he sat waiting for Aaron to come back.

"I'll be back in a minute ok?"he said standing up.

"Matt, leave it" Tom pleaded but Matt ignored him. He walked over to Flynn who looked at him with a look of distaste.

"What do you want?"

"I just wanted to tell you that I won't be causing any more problems between you and Aaron. I'll leave you two alone from now on."

"What's brought this on?"

"Sometimes you just have to accept that you can't always have what you want. Like you said, I need to move on."

Flynn was shocked. This was the last thing he'd been expecting to hear.

"Well, I'm pleased to hear it, if you mean it."

"I do and you don't need to worry, what happened a few weeks ago, I won't ever mention it."

"Why, what happened a few weeks ago?" asked Aaron as he sat down again next to Flynn.

"Nothing, leave it Aaron, yeah" Flynn said.

"No, come on, I just love hearing his stories."

"Aaron, please" Flynn said a bit more urgently. He looked at Matt wondering what he was going to do. He could tell he was angry, that Aaron was winding him up.

"So, what have you dreamt up this time? It'll have to be good to top the tattoo story."

Matt looked at him with hate in his eyes. "Me and your boyfriend kissed. That's what happened a few weeks ago."

"Yeah, course you did. What colour is the sky in your world cos you obviously don't live in the real one."

Flynn was looking at the table. He couldn't look at Matt and he definitely couldn't look at Aaron. His heart was pounding and he thought he was going to throw up.

"Don't I? I don't hear Flynn denying it, do you?"

"He doesn't have to. Your stories aren't going to work anymore so why don't you just jog on and leave us alone."

Matt looked at Flynn's bowed head. "I'm sorry, I really wouldn't have said anything you know" he said as he walked off.

"Unbelievable, how low is that?" Aaron said. He looked at Flynn still sitting with his head bowed and alarm bells began to ring.

"No, no, you didn't" he said, his voice full of emotion.

Flynn looked at him with tears in his eyes. "I'm sorry, it's not what you think, it's not how he made it sound."

"I don't believe it. You told me you had no feelings for him" Aaron said as tears formed in his eyes and began to trickle down his cheeks.

"I don't, like I said it's not how he made it sound."

Without another word, Aaron got up. Flynn stood up and went to follow him. Aaron looked at him, wiping away another tear.

"You stay away from me, I don't want you anywhere near me, not now, not ever." He walked away without a backward glance leaving Flynn sobbing with his head in his hands.


	42. Chapter 42

_**For Shawn, hope you enjoy.  
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Aaron put his key in the door and let himself in closing the door behind him. He stood in the little hall trying to pull himself together. Matt's outburst had given the evening an almost surreal feel, like it hadn't happened but the overwhelming feeling of sadness that consumed him told him it was most definitely real. The house was silent for which he was grateful so he took himself off to bed. As he lay there in the dark, the tears flowed. He loved Flynn so much, he thought they had a future and now it was all ruined. After the tears stopped, the anger set in. How could Flynn have been so stupid, how could he have lied to him and kept something so massive from him. He just didn't understand. Sometime in the early morning, he fell into an uneasy sleep. When he woke up the next morning, he managed to get out without seeing Paddy. He went for a walk, trying to sort through the mess that was in his head. He thought back to his and Flynn's week away which seemed like a lifetime ago now. They'd been so happy, talking about living together and now everything had just fallen apart. The village was quiet and he found himself in the little park. He sat on one of the swings and tried to think. Adam was on his way through the village up to Aaron's place. He saw a movement out of the corner of his eye and was surprised to see Aaron. He walked over, wondering what his mate was doing.

"Alright, shall I give you a push or can you manage by yourself?"

Aaron smiled but said nothing.

"Hey, what's up?" Adam said sitting on the swing next to Aaron. Aaron took a deep breath.

"Me and Flynn, we're not together anymore" he said sniffing "he er, he went with someone else behind my back."

"Flynn did, are you sure?" Adam asked unable to keep the shock and surprise out of his voice.

"Course I'm sure, I'm hardly going to make it up am I?" Aaron snapped.

"Wow, I don't know what to say mate, I'm so sorry, I can't believe it. Are you ok?"

"No Adam I'm not ok."

"Sorry, stupid question. So what happened exactly?"

"He kissed his ex a few weeks ago, I found out last night."

Adam sat waiting for more and when it became obvious there was nothing else to follow he said "so they only kissed, nothing else."

"What d'you mean only kissed? I thought if you're in a relationship with someone, you don't do anything with anyone else or have I got that wrong?" Aaron shook his head, unable to understand why Adam didn't appear to think it was as serious as he did.

"Sorry, no you're right, course you shouldn't do anything with anyone else. It's just, it could have been a lot worse, that's what I meant."

"Really, cos it feels pretty bad at the moment."

"I know. Don't suppose you've talked to him have you?"

"I can't."

"But you're going to, right?"

"What's the point? I can't trust him anymore." He got up off the swing and walked off, hands in his pockets, head down. Adam knew better than to follow him so he sat there still stunned at what he'd been told. He knew Flynn pretty well and it just wasn't him, he just couldn't imagine him doing that to Aaron. Knowing that Aaron wouldn't want company that day, he decided to go back home.

In his bedroom, just a few miles away, Flynn was trying to decide whether to phone Aaron or not. Aaron had been so angry and hurt the night before, he wasn't sure whether he'd have calmed down enough to want to talk to him and, if he hadn't, he really didn't feel up to being ignored or worse. He felt bad enough as it was. He decided to leave it and go to see him the following morning. He was supposed to be in college but Aaron was far more important to him. He just hoped Aaron would listen to him because the thought of losing him was too much for him to contemplate.

The following morning, Flynn got off the bus and stood waiting for it to leave. He hadn't been able to face breakfast because he felt so sick and now he was here, his nerves were even worse. He walked down the street towards the garage, his heart pounding. As Cain came out of his house, he saw Flynn and walked up to meet him.

"Hey, just so you know, he's in a terrible mood this morning. You're a braver bloke than me if you're going down to see him. I went back to the house to get away from him for a bit."

Flynn looked at him and said "Oh, right. I was hoping he'd have calmed down a bit."

"Sorry to disappoint you then. Come on, I'll walk down with you."

They walked down the road together. As they turned the corner Cain shouted "Oi, smiler, look who I found" before walking past Aaron and into the garage itself. Aaron looked up from the car he was working on, saw Flynn and put his head back down again. Flynn walked towards him and stood next to the car.

"Alright" he said. He got no reply. "Aaron, talk to me" he said. Aaron ignored him and carried on working.

"Aaron, please, don't ignore me."

"I'm busy" Aaron snarled.

"Well can we talk later?"

"I'll be busy later too."

"Aaron…"

"Look, just go will you. I don't want to talk to you, I thought I made that clear."

Flynn sighed and walked away with his head down. As soon as he was out of sight, Aaron stood with his hands on his hips looking up to the sky and breathed deeply. He looked over at Cain who shook his head. "I'm not saying a word" he said.

"Good, make sure it stays that way" Aaron barked at him.

"Except for this." Aaron pulled a face but he stayed where he was. "I don't know what's happened between you two and I don't want to know either but if you don't sort it, you'll regret it for the rest of your life. You never thought you'd meet anyone else after Jackson but you have done and he's a good bloke too. Not many people get a genuine second chance at happiness so don't be a muppet all your life, stop your sulking and talk to him." He looked at Aaron's face wondering if any of what he had said would sink in. Aaron stared back at him. "Have you finished now cos if you have, I've got work to do" he said. When lunchtime arrived, about an hour later, Aaron decided to go home. He marched in and slammed the door. He was still annoyed about Cain sticking his oar in, mainly because he knew he was right and his mood didn't improve when he found Paddy and Flynn sitting in the kitchen.

"What's he doing here?" Aaron snapped at Paddy.

"I saw him outside and invited him in for a drink, why, is there a problem?"

Aaron ignored him and turned to Flynn. "What have you said to him?"

"Nothing" Flynn said.

"Am I missing something here?" Paddy asked but Aaron and Flynn didn't respond.

"Fine, I'll leave you to it" Paddy said. Aaron glared at Flynn.

"Aaron, please, I know you're angry but we've got to talk about this" Flynn said quietly.

"No, we don't" Aaron replied.

Flynn shook his head. "So, that's it. You're not even prepared to let me try to explain."

"Why should I?"

"Because there's two sides to every story. Just hear me out, you owe me that much." Aaron looked at Flynn's face, at the face of the person he loved more than anything in the world, at the face that used to be full of smiles but was now just miserable. He walked over and sat down at the table. "Go on then, I'm listening" he said.

"The night it happened, I was waiting for you in Bar West. I went over to ask him why he'd said all that stuff to you. He said it was because you had me and he hated it. I told him that he'd have to find a way to deal with it, to get on with his life. Before I realised what was happening, he kissed me. I didn't want him to do it, I didn't lead him on or anything, he just leant over and did it but I never felt a thing because I'm completely in love with you. I'm not interested in him or anyone else Aaron. I haven't been since the day I met you."

Aaron looked at him and he knew he was telling the truth but it wasn't enough.

"You don't get it do you? I can probably get over the kiss, it's the fact that you didn't tell me that's the problem. How can I ever trust you again?"

"Because I've never let you down before. I've never given you any reason to doubt me. This whole thing was a one off. He even said he could tell I had no feelings left for him. Deep down,you know you can trust me."

"I thought I could, now I'm not so sure and if I can't trust you, then I can't be with you."

Flynn looked at him with tears in his eyes. "Aaron, please don't do this. If you do, Matt wins."

"I don't think anyone wins. You need to go." Flynn looked through his tears at Aaron before getting up and leaving. He couldn't face the long bus ride home, not the way he was feeling, so he went for a walk by the river. There was a bench not too far away from the road and he sat on it, trying to figure out what to do next.

Coming down the road on his quad bike, Adam saw Flynn sitting staring into space. He stopped and looked at him. He couldn't leave him sitting there without finding out how he was doing so he left the quad and walked over to join him.

"How you doing mate?" he asked as he sat down next to him. Flynn just shook his head. "That good eh? He told me what happened. I suppose you've tried talking to him."

"He doesn't want to know. He's still too angry and upset."

"I don't know if this will help but I've known Aaron a long time. The angrier he is on the outside, the more he's hurting on the inside. It's what he does to protect himself. Once he's calmed down a bit, he'll be more reasonable."

"I don't think so. He's never going to forgive me for this."

"Yeah he will, he's had his confidence in you knocked that's all but you can sort it out between you, it's not like you slept with the guy is it?"

"I might as well have done as far as Aaron's concerned. All he knows is that he can't trust me anymore so that's it, over."

"Hey, Aaron's many things but he's not stupid. He'll see it for what it was and he'll come round. Don't give up on him just yet."

"It's not me who's giving up."

Adam looked at his watch. "Look, I'm sorry, I've got to go, will you be alright?"

Flynn nodded. Adam patted his arm before walking back to his quad.

As he turned on to the main street, he saw Aaron in front of him. Aaron heard the quad coming down the road and stopped. Adam took his helmet off and smiled at him.

"How are you doing?" he asked.

Aaron shook his head. "It's such a mess. One minute I'm sad, the next I'm angry, my head's all over the place."

"I know. Look, you're not really going to walk away from him because his ex kissed him and he didn't tell you are you?"

"He lied to me. We both said ages ago no secrets but he obviously meant no secrets unless it suited him to keep one."

"He didn't lie to you, he just didn't tell you the truth."

"Are you trying to be clever?"

"No, course not." Adam hesitated before carrying on. "I've just seen him, on that bench by the river."

"Yeah, so."

"He's in bits, just like you are. Please mate, go and see him."

"Why should I? This is his fault, not mine."

"Don't you think he knows that?" Adam said raising his voice.

"Why are you defending him? You're supposed to be my mate, remember."

"I am your mate which is why I'm trying to stop you from making the biggest mistake of your life. So, he messed up, he should have told you what happened and he didn't but we've all messed up at some point haven't we?" Aaron didn't reply.

"Look, we both know you don't want to lose him anymore than he wants to lose you and I get why you're angry but do you honestly think you can never trust him again because of this one incident?"

"I just didn't think he was like that, that's all."

"Like what, human, capable of making the wrong decision every so often. So, you found out your Mr Perfect isn't perfect after all." In spite of how he was feeling, Aaron couldn't help but smile at him. "So please, go and find him, sort this out."

Aaron's face went serious again. "I can't, not yet" he said before heading back to work. All afternoon, he kept thinking about what Flynn had said, what Adam had said, his head was swimming with words not to mention trying to cope with how he was feeling. Cain looked over and shook his head.

"D'you know what, you've been about as much use as a chocolate teapot this afternoon."

"Sorry, I just can't seem to concentrate" Aaron mumbled.

"Yeah and we both know why don't we? So what are you going to do about it?"

"I'll sort it, alright."

"Good, pleased to hear it. Now get off home. Come back tomorrow when you're a bit more with it."

Once in his room, he thought about what everyone had said to him that day. He decided that he ought to talk to Flynn again so he took his mobile out of his pocket and dialled Flynn's number, walking up and down the room while he waited for him to answer.

"Hello" he heard.

"Hi, it's me. I wondered if we could meet."

"Yeah, sure, course we can."

"Good, how about Bar West tonight, usual time?"

"Ok, see you there."

"Yeah, see you later." All the time he was in the shower and getting ready, he was thinking about what he was going to say. By the time he got off the bus, he was sure he knew what he was going to say. When he walked into Bar West and saw Flynn waiting for him, his mind went blank and he had absolutely no idea what he was going to say. Flynn had already got the drinks in so they went and found a table away from the bar where it was a bit quieter. They sat in silence for a while before Flynn said "I'm glad you called. I didn't think you would, not after earlier."

"Yeah well, I'm full of surprises me" Aaron said. He looked directly at Flynn. "Why didn't you just tell me? That's what I can't get my head round. You know you can tell me anything."

"I know I can and I should have told you and I'm sorry that I didn't. It's no excuse but I know how you've been feeling since he came back and I stupidly thought it would make you feel worse if I told you. I never meant to hurt you, I wouldn't do that."

"I know and I know I had a problem with him. I let him get to me despite you telling me constantly that you weren't interested so I can see why you wouldn't be keen to tell me what happened."

"Yeah but I shouldn't have left him with the opportunity to stir things up. If I'd just been honest, we wouldn't be in this mess."

Aaron smiled at him. "Well, it wasn't one of your best decisions, put it that way." He gazed into Flynn's eyes and he realised that his anger was nothing compared to the love he felt for him and how miserable he would be without him. "We all make mistakes. I've made a lifetime of them already but, if I let this split us up, I'll be making the biggest mistake of them all."

Flynn looked at him with a surprised look on his face. "What?" he asked.

"I'm saying I don't want to lose you. I can't promise it'll be ok overnight but we'll get there."

"Are you sure about this?"

Aaron nodded. "Absolutely certain." He leant forward and kissed Flynn, his head and his heart telling him at the same time that he'd made the right decision. As the night went on, they began to relax a bit and things began to feel more comfortable between them but when the night ended, they went back to their own houses. The following day, Flynn phoned from college and they spoke for ages, both of them happy that things were getting back on track. They arranged to meet on the Friday night to go for a drink in the village. When Flynn knocked on Aaron's door, he had butterflies in his stomach. He knew it was stupid but he couldn't help it. It was almost like they were starting all over again and this was how he used to feel at the beginning. Aaron opened the door and smiled at him. "Alright, come in" he said leaving Flynn to close the door behind him. It gave him a chance to try and calm his nerves. He hadn't been like this about seeing Flynn since they first started seeing each other. Flynn came in and gave him a kiss. "No Paddy?" he asked.

"No, he's at a conference, won't be back til tomorrow."

"Right" Flynn said smiling at him.

"I was thinking, we could always have a few drinks here unless you particularly want to go to the pub." Flynn looked at Aaron and the pub was the last place he wanted to be.

"No, a few drinks here sounds good" he said taking off his jacket.

"Have you eaten, we could get a pizza or something?"

"Yeah, that'd be great but remember…"

"No mushrooms, I know" Aaron said as he picked up the phone. After they'd eaten, they decided to watch a DVD. Cuddled up together on the sofa, they tried to enjoy the film but without much success. Both of them were aware that since they'd sorted things out, they hadn't slept together and being so close to each other now was making it impossible not to think about it. Before, Flynn wouldn't have had any problem making the first move but since he was the one who had messed things up, he didn't feel like he could. He kissed the top of Aaron's head and pulled him closer to him, feeling his own heartbeat quicken as he did so. With his head on Flynn's chest, Aaron could hear Flynn's heart beating. He wanted Flynn so much, it hurt. Even though it had only been a little while, he'd missed that connection with him and he wanted to establish it again. He moved his head so he could look at Flynn, one look at his face telling him he was feeling exactly the same way as him. He kissed him, their lips meeting in a long lingering kiss that increased in intensity as their hands began to move over each other's bodies. As they became hotter and their breathing became heavier, Aaron said in a quiet voice "Come to bed with me." Flynn smiled shyly at him before nodding his head. Aaron switched off the TV and DVD player before taking Flynn's hand and going upstairs.

Both of them were filled with mixed emotions, excitement and desire along with a few nerves too. It felt a bit like their first time again. As Aaron closed his bedroom door, he turned to find Flynn standing close to his bed. They could both feel the electricity in the air, you could cut the sexual tension between them with a knife. Flynn smiled at Aaron and his heart skipped a beat. He walked the few steps to where Flynn was standing and without saying a word kissed him again. All their pent up feelings began to rise to the surface, their hands exploring, teasing and touching the other one's body as their kisses became more demanding. Realising that their feelings were in danger of running away with them, Aaron tried to slow things down. As lazily as he could manage, he undid the buttons on Flynn's shirt and removed it, letting it drop to the floor. Flynn groaned as Aaron gently placed kisses down his neck and along his shoulders, occasionally biting gently as his fingers stroked Flynn's bare skin. Taking his hands away from Aaron's waist, Flynn pulled Aaron's t shirt up over his head, making Aaron shiver as his hands lightly wandered over his chest and slowly down over his stomach. Aaron moaned as Flynn's hand continued to move lower, stopping as he reached the button of Aaron's jeans. He paused as his fingers felt what was waiting for him under the blue denim. Aaron's eyes were a deeper shade of blue than usual, his lips redder from all their kissing as he looked at Flynn, silently begging him to carry on. Without moving his hand, Flynn walked backwards and lay on the bed pulling Aaron down on top of him. He wasn't sure how much longer he could wait but luckily for him, Aaron was struggling with restraint too. Flynn felt Aaron's fingers fumble with his jeans as their lips crashed against each other. They tore off any remaining clothes, both of them struggling to keep any semblance of control over their feelings. The sight of each other naked again did nothing to help, bare skin against bare skin feeling so good to both of them. Their desire for each other was too strong to ignore, everything was fast and frantic but they were powerless to do anything about it, powerless to fight the sensations that were surging through their bodies. All too soon and far quicker than either of them really wanted, it was over, leaving them breathless and exhausted in each other's arms. Neither of them could speak and now that that special intimate connection between them had been re established, neither wanted to let go of the other one. Every so often, one of them would place a soft little kiss on the other one's face or body as they waited to recover.

"I'm sorry" Aaron said, breaking the silence.

"For what?" Flynn asked, moving his head to try and catch Aaron's eye but without any luck. He watched as Aaron's face reddened.

"I'm sorry it was so quick" he mumbled, not able to look Flynn in the face. Flynn couldn't help but smile. They'd both been as bad as each other so why Aaron felt the need to apologise was beyond him. Whether it was five minutes or five hours, he didn't care, anytime he slept with Aaron it was special and he thought Aaron knew that by now.

"Aaron, look at me" he said. Aaron raised his head, his blue eyes back to their normal colour. Flynn smiled at him and he smiled back.

"Do I look disappointed? Do you really think I'm bothered if it was a bit speedy? Have you heard me complain?"

Aaron creased his brow as he thought. "Er, no, hopefully not and no I didn't hear you complain but I did hear you moan a fair bit."

Flynn laughed. "That's pretty good for you. So, we've established that I'm ok with what happened, are you disappointed or complaining?"

"No, definitely not."

"So what are you apologising for? As long as it's me and you, it's always special. You worry too much" he said as he kissed him tenderly. He felt Aaron cuddle in even closer as his anxiety melted away, soothed by Flynn's gentle touches as well as his words. "Anyway, there's nothing stopping us from having another go, see what happens second time around."

Aaron grinned at him. "No, there isn't is there?" he said as he pulled Flynn on top of him and kissed him, gently at first but the gentleness didn't last for long. The second time was much more leisurely, much more like it usually was with each putting the other one's needs before their own while there was only one word to describe their third time - mindblowing.

"You so need a shower" Aaron said wrinkling his nose as he held Flynn close.

"Well you don't exactly smell of roses yourself you know" Flynn replied.

"I know. Fancy washing my back for me?"

"Only if that's all you want, I'm knackered" Flynn said yawning.

"Yeah me too. Come on, before we both fall asleep" Aaron murmured as he got out of bed and pulled Flynn out of bed to join him. Within a few minutes, they were back in bed, barely able to keep their eyes open. They fell asleep in each others arms, the words I love you the last thing they both heard, a goodnight kiss the last thing they both felt.


	43. Chapter 43

The next morning when Aaron woke up, the wind was blowing a gale and the rain was lashing against the window but, as far as he was concerned, it was a beautiful morning because he was waking up next to Flynn again. Last night had been such a special night, the final step in getting their relationship back to where it had been before and he promised himself that he wasn't going to let anything spoil it for them again. He looked at the clock and saw that it was after ten. He didn't want to disturb Flynn who was sleeping like a baby curled up beside him but he needed to use the toilet so, as carefully as he could, he got out of bed and went to the bathroom. When he returned, Flynn was awake and smiled at him as he came back into the room. Aaron smiled back thinking that Flynn had never looked as gorgeous as he did right now.

"I wondered where you'd got to, I thought you might have gone to sort out some breakfast for us" Flynn said.

"Not yet, I want to stay here with you for a bit longer" Aaron replied as he climbed back into bed and gave Flynn a kiss. "There's no rush is there?" he asked as he cuddled up to Flynn. "No, there's no rush" Flynn said putting his arm around Aaron. They lay there sometimes talking, sometimes silent, relaxed and happy to be together like this again. Flynn felt Aaron's fingers tracing over the outline of his tattoo and he smiled to himself.

"You're doing it again" he said.

"Doing what?" Aaron asked.

"Going over my tattoo with your fingers."

"Am I? Sorry, I didn't realise."

"No, it's fine, you can run your fingers over whatever bits of me you want, I was just wondering why you do it."

Aaron thought for a few seconds before looking at Flynn. "I suppose I find it comforting, it sort of helps me relax. Sounds weird doesn't it?"

"No, not really, if it keeps you happy, you carry on." They smiled at each other before Flynn kissed him, a long tender kiss full of love. Both knew it wouldn't go any further than a kiss and they were both fine with that. Sometimes, they enjoyed just kissing and cuddling, being close to each other and this was one of those times. As Aaron cuddled back into him again, Flynn was reminded of a line from his mum's favourite Westlife song, Flying Without Wings. She'd played it so many times, the words were etched into his brain, whether he wanted them to be or not. The line says it's little things that only I know, those are the things that make you mine and only now did he realise how true that sentiment was. Only he knew that Aaron found stroking his tattoo relaxing or that he always put his left sock on before his right just like Aaron was the only one who knew that he kept his cd's in alphabetical order or that one of his guilty pleasures was The Lion King. He'd been mortified when Aaron found the DVD in the player and Aaron had teased him mercilessly for a good couple of days afterwards for liking a film that was a cartoon and had songs and stuff in it but then he'd said that he thought it was sweet and they'd even watched it together a few times. Knowing things like that about each other made him feel like they belonged together and that's how he wanted it to stay. He also wanted to stay in bed with Aaron but his stomach was rumbling and, comfortable as he was, he needed something to eat.

"Any chance of that breakfast then, I'm starving" he asked.

"Yeah, ok but I'm not bringing it up here. If I have to get up, so do you."

"Fair enough" Flynn said kissing Aaron again before he got out of bed and started to get dressed. By the time Aaron stirred and got out of bed himself, Flynn was fully clothed and sitting on the end of the bed waiting for him. Aaron took his clothes out and put them on the bed before going to the bathroom. When he came back, he started to get dressed chatting to Flynn as he did so. He put one sock on and then realised he couldn't find the other one. He checked the floor in case he'd dropped it, stood up to make sure he wasn't sitting on it but he couldn't find it anywhere. He looked over at Flynn who was waiting patiently, fiddling with his chain.

"Ok, where is it?" Aaron asked.

"Where's what?" Flynn said, his face a picture of innocence.

"My sock."

"I don't know, maybe you only took one out of the drawer."

Aaron was pretty sure he'd taken out a pair but he went to check anyway. There was no odd sock in the drawer. He turned around and faced Flynn.

"Come on, give" he said holding out his hand.

"I haven't got it" Flynn said starting to laugh, holding out his two hands to show Aaron they were empty. Aaron walked over to him. "Last chance, hand it over."

"I can't give you what I haven't got" Flynn said.

"Right" said Aaron as he wrestled Flynn off the bed. Exactly where Flynn had been sitting was his sock. As he put it on, he said "Are you going to be messing about like this all day?"

"I don't know, I might do" Flynn said picking himself up off the floor. "I'm in such a good mood who knows what I'll do."

Aaron nodded his head. "Great, lucky me." Flynn went to go downstairs but Aaron stopped him and kissed him holding him tightly, enjoying the feeling of Flynn's arms encircling him and holding him back just as tightly. "Do us a favour, put the kettle on will you?"

"I'll try but I don't think it'll fit" Flynn said.

"Oh please tell me this will stop soon" Aaron said as Flynn left the room.

When Paddy pulled onto the driveway, he noticed Flynn's car parked outside. He was both relieved and pleased that the two of them had managed to sort things out. He still didn't know the full story, all Aaron had told him was that it was something to do with Flynn's ex but he didn't want to talk about it and he hadn't pushed him any further. As he put his key in the door and opened it, he could hear Aaron's voice, "Will you stop that, behave yourself will you, just go and sit down, if you do that again I swear…." He smiled as he closed the door.

"Alright you two, not interrupting anything am I?" he said.

"Paddy, great timing for once, am I glad to see you" Aaron said pushing Flynn away from him and guiding him onto a chair. "Can you get something out of your surgery and give it to him to calm him down, he's doing my head in." Paddy watched as Flynn smiled at Aaron and Aaron tried unsuccessfully not to smile back. "He looks calm enough to me" he said.

"Yeah well looks can be deceiving."

"I know, you're living proof of that." Aaron pulled a face before carrying on getting them something to eat. Paddy had already eaten but he joined them for a cup of tea as they ate then made himself scarce. They watched a bit of TV and by mid afternoon decided to go to the pub before heading off to Flynn's. As they walked in, they bumped into Cain who was on his way out. "Aah, look who it is, Romeo and Romeo" he said. Flynn smiled as Aaron with a bored look on his face said " you're not funny."

"Well, he's smiling."

"Yeah well he's in a strange mood, I don't know what's got into him."

"Ooh, I'd rather not think about what's got into him if you don't mind" Cain said. Flynn's mouth dropped open as Aaron started to blush. Cain smiled." Look at your faces, classic. Anyway, time I wasn't here" he said. "Oh, and you" he said pointing at Flynn "Do us all a favour, try not to fall out with him again, he's a right pain in the backside when he's miserable." He smiled at them both before leaving.

"I can't believe he just said that" Aaron said as they made their way to the bar.

"Well you are a pain in the backside when you're miserable."

"Not that bit."

"No, I know Aaron. Your face was a picture. You're so cute when you get embarrassed" Flynn said laughing.

"Am I? Just get the drinks in, I'll be back in a minute" Aaron said kissing him briefly.

Flynn ordered their drinks and by the time he'd been served, Aaron was back. They sat down next to each other rather than opposite each other, wanting to remain close. They'd only been there about ten minutes when Adam arrived. He'd been so busy with work he hadn't seen Aaron to see if he'd sorted things out with Flynn. He'd sent him a text asking how things were and Aaron had sent back a message saying ok which didn't really tell him a lot. Looking at the two of them now chatting, smiling, sitting so close their legs were touching, it was obvious they'd sorted everything out and he couldn't have been happier. He walked straight over, a big smile on his face. "Alright you two. You both look a lot better than the last time I saw you" he said sitting down.

Flynn smiled at him. "Yeah well, I don't know what he looked like when you saw him last but I couldn't have looked much worse. Pint is it?" he asked Adam as he stood up.

"Cheers mate, that'd be great" Adam said. As Flynn walked off, Adam looked at Aaron. "Well?"

Aaron smiled at his friend. "Yeah, I'm alright thanks how are you?"

"Funny guy. You know what I mean."

" Well, I had a think about what you said and what I wanted and we did that thing that grown ups do, what's it called now, oh yeah talk, that's it and we sorted things out." He glanced over to where Flynn was chatting to Marlon as he waited to be served before looking back at Adam. "I just realised I couldn't lose him."

"Ah, nice one mate, I'm chuffed for you, for both of you. See, I do know what I'm talking about sometimes."

"Yeah, you'll be having a column in the weekly paper next. Ask Adam, no problem too big or too small."

Adam laughed. "Now, that's not a bad idea, I could make some extra cash out of my words of wisdom."

"Yeah well, I wouldn't go giving up the day job just yet."

"Oh, I don't know. If I can sort your head out, everyone elses will be a piece of cake."

Aaron smiled at him before turning serious. "Look mate, all joking aside, thanks for making me see sense."

"No worries, I've always got your back, you know that."

"Yeah, I know. What would I do without you?"

"Er, isn't that supposed to be the sort of thing you say to me" Flynn said handing Adam his drink and sitting down next to Aaron again.

"Yeah but you hear stuff like that more often than he does. He's been on his own for so long now, when he does meets someone, she'll need to come with an instruction book so he knows what to do."

"Ooh, that's harsh" Flynn said.

"Harsh but true" Adam said. Aaron looked at Flynn, a silent communication passing between them. Flynn nodded his head.

"Right you, how d'you fancy a night out in town tonight, the three of us. You need a decent night out."

"Bar West again, great" Adam said smiling.

"No, you're in charge tonight. We'll go wherever you want to go, see if we can find someone daft enough to be interested in you and, if we're with you, you'll have an advantage over everyone else out on the pull."

"Oh yeah, how d'you work that one out then?"

"Well, you'll probably be the only lad out with mates who aren't interested in what you are. There'll be less competition and any girls that come our way, you'll get first go at."

Flynn turned to look at Aaron. "First go at, wow, you really do have a way with words don't you?"

"Oh shut up, you know what I mean. So, what do you say?" Aaron said looking at Adam.

"Alright then, you're on. Let's do it."

Later that evening, Adam and Aaron met Flynn in town and started going round the pubs and bars. They played pool, had a few drinks and a laugh until Adam decided he wanted to go to a new nightclub that had just opened. He was enjoying being in charge and loved the look on Aaron's face when he suggested it knowing that this was his night and Aaron couldn't say no. The club was modern, full of glass and wood and leather and had a sound system that made you feel the bass vibrating through you as you walked around. It was packed and it took ages to get served. Flynn and Adam were itching to get on the dance floor but for the moment they resisted, not wanting to leave Aaron on his own. They took their drinks and went for a wander instead. The club had all the usual suspects on show. There was the bloke who thought he was a fantastic dancer but couldn't dance to save his life and his mates who thought it was hilarious to convince him to keep dancing, there was the smooth operator who sidled up to girls and moved on to the next one every time he got knocked back determined to find somebody to spend the evening with. Then there were the groups of girls who approached groups of blokes with the precision of a military operation, each knowing which one of the group they were going to target and, of course, not forgetting the people watchers who stood and watched others make fools of themselves for their own entertainment. As they moved around, Aaron pointed out some girls that he thought Adam might be interested in with Flynn watching with interest as Adam knocked back every suggestion. The two of them didn't notice the girls sat at a table towards the back of the club watching the three of them but Flynn did. He said something to Adam who looked over and smiled. All of the girls smiled back so they made their way over. Adam asked if they could join them, the girls said yes and they sat down. With introductions made and the help of all the alcohol they'd drunk so far, the conversation flowed quite nicely and the girls seemed like a good laugh. After a while, one of them stood up and said "Right, anyone fancy dancing?" One of her friends got up to join her as did Adam. She looked at Aaron and Flynn. "You joining us then?" Aaron said no while Flynn said "Er, I'll stay here for a while, maybe later" before looking at Aaron.

"No, you go, someone has to show him how it's done, stop him doing his dad dancing in public." The girls laughed and Flynn grinned at him. "Right, see you in a bit then." The four of them went off leaving Aaron with the one remaining girl whose name was Maddie. They spoke for a while, just the usual general chat before she said to him "So, you're not a dancer then?"

Aaron shook his head. "With my two left feet, I'm lucky I can walk without falling over, never mind dance."

She looked past Aaron at the dance floor where Adam, Flynn and the girls were dancing. "Your mates not bad, no dad dancing yet but your boyfriend's better." Aaron looked at her not quite believing what he'd heard. "He is your boyfriend isn't he, I haven't got it wrong."

"No, you haven't got it wrong" Aaron replied. "So how did you know?"

She smiled at him. "I just have a knack of noticing things other people don't. Your friend, Adam is it?" she said. Aaron nodded. "When Katie mentioned dancing, he was up like a shot and he hasn't looked over here once. Flynn on the other hand said no and then he only went to dance when you said it was ok and every so often, he looks over to make sure you're alright."

"Does he?" said Aaron turning his head to look at where they were dancing. Right on cue, Flynn caught Aaron's eye. Aaron smiled and he smiled back.

"See, told you."

"I never noticed. You're good, you can't read minds as well can you?

"No, whatever goes on in there, it's safe."

"That's a relief cos that could be really embarrassing. So are you seeing anyone?"

"Not at the moment. I have this habit of saying things that should have stayed in my head and I end up upsetting people. I don't mean to, I just say things without thinking it through first like what I said to you for example. You could have got really angry and told me it's none of my business or I could have been completely wrong, could you imagine how embarrassing that would have been." She shook her head and reached for her drink. At that moment, Adam came over and sat down next to her.

"So, apart from Mr No Co-ordination here, you're the only one who hasn't danced yet. Now, I know it'll be a struggle to drag you away from his non stop conversation but what do you say, coming to join us?"

Maddie smiled at him. "Yeah why not." A few minutes later, Flynn came back to sit with Aaron. It was hard for both of them, surrounded by couples and not really able to show their affection like everyone else could but this was Adam's night and one night here wouldn't do them any harm. It wasn't too long until the slow songs came on. Adam was dancing with Maddie so the other two girls came back over to Aaron and Flynn and sat down. They had a quick drink before Katie looked at Flynn and said "I hate sitting down during the slow songs, you'll dance with me won't you?"

"Oh, I erm, I think I've done enough dancing for one night."

"Oh come on, a couple more won't kill you."

"No, I'll pass thanks." He looked over at Aaron who was enjoying his slight discomfort. "Anyway, I'm already seeing someone, it wouldn't feel right."

"It's only a dance, it's no big deal."

"I know but they're the only one that I really want to dance with right now."

"But they're not here are they, I am."

Flynn took a deep breath. "Actually they are here" he said looking straight at Aaron smiling "He's just there." Aaron smiled back at him.

Katie looked at the two of them taking a few seconds for the penny to drop. "Oh right I see, you're…..so, you two are together. Thank god for that, I thought I was losing my touch for a minute. So you won't mind if I go and find someone else."

"No be my guest" Flynn said. The two girls went off leaving Aaron ands Flynn alone.

"So, I'm the only one you want to dance with am I?" Aaron said letting his hand come to rest on Flynn's.

"You re the only one I want to do a lot of things with."

"Really?" Aaron said raising his eyebrows.

"I'm not talking about that, trust you to lower the tone. I'm talking about what we spoke about before, you know, being together properly, living together, having a future."

"Are you going all soppy on me cos you've had a few?"

"It's not soppy, it's just honest" Flynn said. Aaron looked into his eyes and his heart melted. He wished they were in Bar West where no one would bat an eyelid if he kissed Flynn the way he wanted to kiss him.

"I know. It's still what I want too, I haven't changed my mind and I'm not going to either."

"Really, I thought after the whole Matt thing…"

"Who?" Aaron interrupted.

"Very funny. I know we're back together but I thought it might have made you think about things differently."

"It did, it made me more sure than ever that it's what I want." He leant over and kissed Flynn briefly on the lips. They smiled at each other and finished their drinks as they waited for Adam. He came over on his own a few minutes later.

"Are you off then?" Aaron said.

"No, she's going home with her friends."

"Oh, bad luck mate, it looked like it was going alright."

Adam laughed. "It did go alright. We're going out again tomorrow if you must know."

"Nice one" Flynn said.

"Right" Aaron said getting to his feet "job done, let's get out of here then."

They walked to the taxi rank and waited with everyone else. Flynn suggested that Adam stopped the night at his place, his parents weren't there and the taxi would be cheaper as well. When they got back, they decided they fancied cheese on toast and a hot drink so Flynn went into the kitchen to sort it out. Adam and Aaron went in to the other room and Aaron switched the TV on, more for background noise than anything else. They sat chatting for a while before Aaron said "I think I'll go and see if he needs any help."

"Yeah right, you just can't keep away from him can you?"

Aaron's only response was to throw a cushion at Adam as he walked past. He went into the kitchen where Flynn turned to see who had come in. He grinned when he saw Aaron.

"Come to lend a hand?"

"Not exactly" Aaron said as he put his arms around Flynn and cuddled him. Their lips met and they kissed each other slowly and tenderly, completely lost in the moment until Adam's voice brought them back to reality.

"Oi, I don't know what you two are doing in there but something's burning."

Aaron moved away from Flynn and took the tray out from under the grill. "There's only one bit that's a bit black, the rest is ok. I'll have the burnt one."

"See what happens when you're around, you're a distraction. Go and sit with Adam, I'll be out in a minute" Flynn said shooing Aaron out of the way. Aaron kissed him again before doing as he was told. When Flynn brought the food and drink in, Adam was sitting in an armchair and Aaron was on the sofa so he sat on the sofa next to him. While they were eating and drinking, they talked about the evening and what a good time they'd had.

"She's a nice girl you know, don't know what she saw in you" Aaron said to Adam.

"Well, what can I say, there's no accounting for taste is there, I mean look at you two."

Aaron turned to Flynn. "Don't listen to him, I think you're alright and that's all that matters" he said patting him on the leg.

"He is, I agree, I was talking about you."

"Hey, I'm lovely me. Tell him " he said looking at Flynn.

"You're not bad" Flynn said.

"Listen boys, thanks for tonight. I know you couldn't enjoy yourself like you normally would so I really appreciate it."

"Don't be daft" Aaron said "we had a great time didn't we?" Flynn nodded.

"Right, where am I sleeping then?" Adam asked Flynn.

"Straight up the stairs, second door on the left, the bathroom's opposite."

"Great, I'll see you two in the morning, well, later this morning" he said as he made his way upstairs. Aaron and Flynn smiled at each other.

"Ready to go up?" Flynn asked.

"In a minute, let's give him a while to settle down first."

"Ok" Flynn said as he put his arm around him. Aaron kissed him, pleased to be on his own with his boyfriend again. It didn't take long for their kisses to become more intense, for them to start enjoying being together. After a while, Flynn moved away.

"We better stop. These walls are paper thin, there's no way we can carry on when we get upstairs, not with Adam in the room next to ours."

"Then, we'll stay where we are" Aaron said grinning at him, pulling him back towards him and kissing him again. When they made their way upstairs some time later and got into bed, they could hear snoring coming from the room where Adam was obviously fast asleep. After they'd stopped laughing, Aaron said "Blimey, you weren't kidding about thin walls were you?"

Flynn shook his head. "Nope, good job all we're going to do now is sleep."

"If we can ignore that racket" Aaron said smiling. They kissed each other goodnight and within a few minutes both were fast asleep, the alcohol and the lateness of the hour finally catching up with them.


	44. Chapter 44

As the days grew shorter and the weather continued to get colder, Flynn and Aaron had never been happier. With all their problems now behind them, they were looking forward to a shared future again. They'd even had a look on the internet at a few flats and houses for rent, just to give them an idea of the cost and it shocked them both how expensive it was. It looked like living together wouldn't become a reality for them any time soon. In the weeks that followed, the Dales were hit by some freakish bad weather. First, it snowed constantly for days, then the temperature plummeted to below freezing making the roads especially around the village impassable. Thankfully, there followed a couple of days where the weather picked up a bit so Flynn took advantage and phoned Aaron and arranged to meet him in the Woolie for a drink. When he arrived, Aaron was sitting with Adam and Alex. For some reason he couldn't explain, as soon as he saw Aaron, he got a feeling that something wasn't right. He looked fine, relaxed and happy but some sixth sense told him things weren't what they seemed. Their eyes met and Aaron came straight over.

"You're late" he said giving him a quick kiss.

"Yeah I know, I'm sorry. I stopped off at your place to drop some more stuff off and couldn't get away from Paddy."

"In the mood for a chat was he?"

"Something like that. So, you alright?" Flynn asked trying to keep his voice it's usual tone.

Aaron smiled at him. "Course I am, why wouldn't I be?"

"Just checking, that's all" Flynn said.

Aaron pulled a face before continuing. " So, are you stopping at mine tonight?"

"What, on a school night, don't know about that" Flynn said shaking his head.

"Since when has that ever stopped you? Come on, you know you want to." Flynn smiled at Aaron. He couldn't think of anything that he'd like to do more. "Go on then but you better let me get some sleep. I've got a mad day tomorrow."

"I'll let you have a couple of hours or so if you're lucky" Aaron said.

Flynn ordered his drink and they went to sit down with Adam and Alex. They had a good evening, playing darts, having a few drinks and a laugh. Flynn kept an eye on Aaron and, just once or twice, he thought he saw something in his eyes but just as quickly as it appeared, it was gone again. When they got home, they watched a bit of TV together before they went upstairs. As he was getting undressed, Flynn watched as Aaron took off his jumper and sat down on the bed.

"Hey, where's your chain?" he asked noticing that Aaron wasn't wearing it.

Aaron automatically put his hand up to where the chain should have been, his fingers touching warm bare skin instead of cold metal. "Er, it broke when I was getting changed earlier on" Aaron said quietly.

"Oh, Aaron I'm sorry" Flynn said as he sat down on the bed next to him "Come here."

Aaron turned his body and rested his head on Flynn's shoulder letting him hold him, taking comfort from the feeling of Flynn's arms around him.

"I knew something was wrong as soon as I saw you" Flynn said.

"Did you, well no one else did" Aaron said.

"Yeah because they don't know you like I do." Aaron pulled back and looked at him with the saddest expression in his eyes Flynn had ever seen.

"We can always get a new chain" Flynn suggested trying to be positive. Aaron shook his head. "It wouldn't be the same, it wouldn't be Jackson's anymore."

"No, that's true. Well, we'll get it fixed."

Aaron shook his head again. "It can't be fixed, not looking at how it's broken. This is the first time I've took it off since Hazel gave it to me. It feels weird not wearing it."

"I can imagine" Flynn said sympathetically. They sat in silence for a couple of minutes before Flynn reached out and took Aaron's hand in his. "Are you ok?" he asked "and don't tell me what you think I want to hear, tell me the truth."

Aaron squeezed his hand gently. "I will be, once I get used to not wearing it. It's not like I need to wear it to remember him is it?" He smiled at Flynn who wasn't sure if those words were true or if Aaron was just trying to convince himself but he said nothing. He just leant towards him and kissed him. It was supposed to be a kiss of comfort but as their lips met, it soon turned into a long slow tender kiss that neither wanted to end. As they lay down on the bed and Aaron felt Flynn's bare chest touch his, all thoughts of the broken chain left his head, temporarily at least. For now, all he could think about was Flynn and how he didn't want to ever be without him.

When they woke up the next morning, there had been a fresh snowfall overnight and the snow was still falling as they ate their breakfast. Aaron didn't want Flynn to drive anywhere but Flynn said that he had to and that the main roads would probably be fine. When Aaron left to go to work, he made Flynn promise to phone him when he got to college and Flynn agreed. About an hour or so later, Aaron's mobile rang and he was relieved to see it was Flynn.

"Alright, you made it then?"

"Yeah safe and sound. It took longer than usual but it was ok."

"Good. Take it easy getting home yeah."

"I will now stop worrying. I'll speak to you later." Aaron ended the call and put his phone back in his pocket. As he turned, he slipped and fell over with his leg bent underneath him. Cain heard him fall and looked up from his newspaper.

"Well get up then you big jessie cos you'll be there a long time if you're waiting for me to pick you up."

"I can't" Aaron said, his face twisted in pain.

"What d'you mean you can't?"

"I mean I can't stand up, I think I've done some serious damage."

Cain put his paper down and stood up. "This better not be some sort of wind up or I'll do you some serious damage." As he got closer, he saw the look on Aaron's face and he knew this was no wind up. He got Aaron into a car and took him to the hospital. A few hours of sitting in A&E followed by an x-ray showed that Aaron had broken a bone in his leg. After having his leg put in plaster from his ankle to half way up his thigh and being given some crutches and pain killers, Cain was allowed to take him home. When Aaron spoke to Flynn later that evening, Flynn wanted to come straight over but Aaron told him there was no point, the tablets were making him sleepy and he was just going to go to bed.

The weather continued to be unseasonably bad. With the snow and the ice, venturing out with two fully functioning legs was a risk, never mind when one was in plaster and you needed crutches for support. One week turned into two, Aaron hadn't been out of the house and Flynn hadn't been able to get over to see him either. They spoke every day but it wasn't the same as spending time together. Needless to say, Aaron wasn't in the best of moods. Paddy had been quite glad to go to work every day to get away from him for a bit. Sitting on the sofa with his leg propped up, Aaron checked his watch and saw that it was just after one in the afternoon. Soon he would have to make the tricky decision of whether to watch one of the numerous home improvement shows that seemed to be on every channel at that time of day or tune in to the afternoon edition of the Jeremy Kyle show and watch some family try to solve their problems in front of the nation. Oh, the joys of daytime TV he thought. Just then, his mobile rang and he saw Flynn's name flashing on the screen.

"Alright" he said "what are you doing phoning at this time, shouldn't you be in registration or a lesson or something?"

"I've got a study period so I thought I'd give you a call and see how you're doing" Flynn said.

"I have never been so bored in my life" Aaron moaned.

"And how's the leg?"

"Sore or itchy or sometimes both. I can't sleep properly because it's uncomfortable which means I'm tired all the time so everything's getting on my nerves and not being able to get out of this house is doing my head in."

"So it's going well then" Flynn said laughing.

"Oh yeah I'm having a great time."

"Well, how would you like to spend the weekend at my place? The roads aren't too bad now so I could come and pick you up after college on Friday, we could get a takeaway, watch a couple of films, what do you think?"

"Sounds great but listen, the roads around here are still pretty bad so don't drive over, I'll get Paddy to drop me off."

"Shouldn't you ask him first, he might be busy" Flynn asked.

"Even if he is, he'll do it. After the mood I've been in, trust me, he won't be able to get me out of the door quick enough."

"Well you better not be in a mood when you get over here or I'll send you straight back."

"Somehow, I don't think I will be" Aaron said smiling.

"Good, so I'll see you about six on Friday then."

"Ok. Love you."

"Love you too." After he ended the call, Aaron realised that he hadn't asked whether they would be on their own or not but then he realised that he didn't care. He just wanted to see Flynn again, whether his parents would be there or not.

When Paddy pulled up outside Flynn's house on Friday evening, Flynn must have been watching out for them because the front door opened before Aaron had even got out of the car. Flynn took Aaron's bag from Paddy and moved to one side to let Aaron hobble into the house. Once Aaron was safely inside, he closed the front door and put the bag on the floor. They grinned at each other before Flynn put his arms around Aaron and hugged him. "I've really missed you" he said.

"I've missed you too" Aaron answered. Flynn kissed him softly on the lips and went to walk away expecting Aaron to follow. "Er, hang on a minute, where d'you think you're going?" Aaron said, his blue eyes twinkling. "We haven't seen each other for two weeks and that little kiss is all I get."

"Well, I didn't want you standing for too long. I was going to wait until you were a bit more comfortable" Flynn said.

"Don't you think I've waited long enough?" Aaron replied. Flynn walked the couple of steps back to Aaron and kissed him, a long lingering kiss that made them both realise how much they'd missed this physical contact.

"So, where's your mum and dad then?" Aaron asked as he hopped on his crutches towards the living room.

"Not back til tomorrow night so it's just me and you I'm afraid." They smiled at each other again.

When Aaron made it into the living room, he stopped in his tracks. The dining table that occupied one end of the room had been set for two with tea lights and candles waiting to be lit. Aaron's face fell.

"Aaron what's wrong?" Flynn asked.

"I'm so sorry, whatever it is I've forgotten, I'll make it up to you I promise" he said quickly running through all the important dates in his head.

"You haven't forgotten anything, idiot. I just wanted to do something nice for you, cheer you up."

"That's great but it's a bit over the top for a takeaway isn't it?"

"We're not having takeaway, I'm gonna cook and there's your favourite for dessert."

"With this thing on my leg, I very much doubt that" Aaron said, a wry smile on his face. Flynn smiled back at him. "So, d'you want a beer?" he asked.

"Yeah, that'd be great, thanks" Aaron said. Flynn brought them both back a beer and, making sure that Aaron was comfortable, they sat and chatted for a while. They felt so happy being together again and, even though they had spoken every day, they still had plenty to say to each other. Flynn eventually went to get dinner sorted out and, when he brought the food through, Aaron had already turned the lights off, lit the candles and put some music on.

"I could have done that" Flynn said putting the plates on the table.

"It's fine, besides if you were choosing the music, I dread to think what we'd be listening to." He hobbled over to sit down putting his crutches on the floor. They enjoyed their meal and Flynn started clearing the table.

"I'll just stick these in the dishwasher and then I'll be back" Flynn said.

"Ok" Aaron said flopping down on the sofa. When Flynn returned, he sat down next to Aaron and held out a neatly wrapped present.

"This is for you" he said.

"Right, now I know I've forgotten something" Aaron said "so stop pretending I haven't and just tell me what it is."

"You haven't forgotten anything alright, just open it."

Flynn watched in anticipation as Aaron tore open the wrapping paper. Inside was a small box. Aaron opened it and his mouth fell open when he saw what was inside. He looked at Flynn who smiled shyly at him.

"I know you said you thought it couldn't be done but I managed to get it fixed for you. It's a bit shorter than it used to be but it's still Jackson's, that's the main thing."

Aaron held the silver chain with the cross and medal on it in his hands. He was stunned, left momentarily speechless by what Flynn had done for him. After a few seconds, he managed to say "How did you do this? You didn't even know where I put it."

"No but Paddy did. I phoned him and talked to him about trying to get it fixed. I'd mentioned it to my dad and he said he knew someone who might be able to help. Paddy brought it over to me at college one day. It er it means you won't get much for Christmas from me. I used the money I was going to spend on your Christmas presents on getting it repaired but I thought if it came to a choice of having that fixed or having something new from me, you'd prefer to have that fixed."

Aaron's blue eyes welled up as he looked at Flynn. He opened and closed his mouth, wanting to say something but nothing would come out. Flynn put his hand on Aaron's leg and said "Hey, it was supposed to make you happy."

Aaron took a deep breath in and composed himself. " It has" he said wiping his eyes and smiling at Flynn "more than you know."

"Here, let me put it on for you" Flynn said taking the chain out of Aaron's shaking hand.

"I can't believe you did this for me" Aaron said, rubbing the chain between his finger and thumb like he used to do. "How did you know that I wouldn't go looking for it?"

"I didn't, I just hoped you wouldn't because then I would have had to tell you and it would have spoilt the surprise."

"Thank you. I don't know what else to say." The way Aaron looked at him before they kissed was something Flynn would never forget. Something unspoken passed between them in that moment, something shifted within their relationship again. He didn't know what it was but he could feel it and he was sure Aaron could too. As they settled down to watch a film on TV, Aaron thought back to when they were having their problems and Flynn had asked him what he could do to prove how much he loved him and he couldn't think of anything. Well, he'd just proved beyond any doubt exactly how much he loved him. He could have left the chain broken in the box and left Aaron to get used to not wearing it but he hadn't because he knew that deep down, Jackson's chain still meant something to him. How many other people would have done that for him? He'd always thought that Flynn was a special person but now he knew just how special he really was and he loved him for it.

Much as he wanted to enjoy the film snuggled up to Flynn, Aaron was struggling to stay awake. His eyes kept closing and then his head would fall forward and he'd wake himself up again. Flynn ended up switching the TV off and they went upstairs. It took Aaron a while to get there and even longer to get ready for bed. Flynn offered to help but he insisted on doing everything himself. He eventually got into bed and sighed heavily.

"You ok?" Flynn asked turning to look at him.

"This thing is seriously getting on my nerves now" Aaron said prodding his cast "it's heavy and I hate that I can't move properly."

"Is that your way of saying that I'm going to have to do all the work? Well, it wouldn't be the first time" Flynn said smiling at him.

"Oi, you've never had to do all the work as you put it" Aaron said wincing as he tried to get comfortable.

"Look, all joking aside, we don't have to do anything you know that. I'm just happy that you're here."

"I know" Aaron said "but we haven't seen each other for weeks and it's not like we're gonna get the house to ourselves that often anymore especially if the weather stays as bad as it has been."

Flynn turned onto his side and propped himself up on one elbow, draping his other arm across Aaron's stomach. "So? We do still sleep together when we don't have the house to ourselves don't we? Aaron, sex with you is amazing but so is going to sleep knowing that you'll be next to me when I wake up in the morning, that I won't be on my own tonight wishing you were here like I do every night we're not together. I just love being with you."

"You're going to make me cry again if you carry on" Aaron said not believing how emotional he felt.

"Sorry, I'll shut up then" Flynn said. He lay on his side and watched Aaron fidget as he tried to get comfortable. Somehow, Aaron managed to brush his lips tenderly against his own before kissing him with a bit more feeling. "I love you" Aaron said knowing he'd never meant it more than he did at that moment.

"I love you too" Flynn replied.

That night, Aaron slept better than he'd slept in a long time. He only woke up twice, unfortunately waking Flynn up both times but they soon dropped back off to sleep again. When he woke up the following morning, he felt happier than he'd felt in ages. They made the most of being on their own that day, knowing that Flynn's parents would be back that night. When his parents did return, they were surprised but pleased to see Aaron as it had been a long time since they'd seen him. They chatted for a while before Flynn's dad went to have a bath. It didn't take too long after that for Flynn's mum to start fussing over Aaron, checking that Flynn had looked after him properly and bringing him extra cushions to try to make him more comfortable. She even told Flynn to get off the sofa so Aaron could rest his leg on it but Aaron had said he was fine with his leg as it was. She left them alone while she went to make them a cup of tea.

"Well, it was nice while it lasted" Flynn said looking at Aaron.

"Yeah, it was. Still, I could get used to your mum running around after me, you should take notes" Aaron said grinning.

"Cheeky, I think I've looked after you pretty well since you got here."

"You have. Listen Flynn, I wanted to say to you ..."

"Do you want anything to eat with your cup of tea?" Flynn's mum shouted through to them.

Flynn looked at Aaron who shook his head. "No thanks mum" Flynn answered. He smiled at Aaron. "Sorry, what were you were going to say?"

"It doesn't matter, it can wait" Aaron said smiling at him. They kissed each other softly and tenderly, Flynn wondering what Aaron had been about to say to him, if he would ever get to hear it or if the moment was gone forever.


	45. Chapter 45

Back in his own bedroom, Aaron stood looking at himself in the mirror. He pulled at his jumper and fiddled with what little hair he had, not quite believing how quickly the time had gone by. His weekend at Flynn's, which had been weeks ago now, had ended up being a week at Flynn's at the suggestion of Flynn's mum. She'd quite rightly pointed out that, as he couldn't work, there was no rush to get back to the village so if he wanted to stay with them for longer, he was more than welcome. It had taken him about a second to make his mind up and say yes, he'd love to stay longer and talking about it afterwards, he and Flynn couldn't believe that they hadn't thought of it themselves. When he did eventually go back home, he'd had hospital appointments to go to, the last one being to remove his cast and now it was just two weeks to go til Christmas. He'd been meaning to ask Flynn what he was doing for Christmas this year but Flynn had been so busy with his college work that they'd hardly seen each other so, whenever they had got together, they hadn't spent a lot of time talking. There was also a part of him that was wary of asking in case he got an answer he wouldn't like. He knew it was only one day but it was an important day to him now and he wanted them to be together so tonight he was going to bite the bullet and just ask Flynn what he was doing. At least then he'd know one way or the other. He put on some aftershave, had one final look in the mirror, picked up his phone, wallet and keys and left to make his way to Flynn's.

When Aaron knocked on the door, Flynn's dad answered and let him in. They had a bit of a chat before he told Aaron Flynn was in his room and to just go on up. As Aaron got to Flynn's bedroom, he could hear Flynn singing "I'm beautiful in my way cos God makes no mistakes, I'm on the right track baby I was born this way."

He opened the bedroom door to see Flynn dancing around his room, buttoning up his shirt. He stopped in his tracks when he saw Aaron and smiled sheepishly.

"Don't let me stop you, please, you carry on" Aaron said "Nice choice of song by the way."

"It's the radio's choice, not mine" Flynn replied "You're welcome to join in if you want."

"Er, no you're alright, I'll pass thanks. Anyway, why are you in such a good mood?"

"Because it's nearly the end of term, Christmas is just around the corner and I'm going out with the fittest bloke on the planet tonight so you better get off cos he'll be here in a minute."

"Aaww, I hate to be the bearer of bad news but no he won't. I bumped into him outside and told him to do one so you'll have to make do with me instead" Aaron said "if that's ok."

"I suppose it'll have to be won't it?" Flynn said giving him a hug and a kiss. "You know what, I'm sure hobbling about on those crutches has made your arms more muscular" he said as they separated.

"Yeah right" Aaron replied.

"I'm telling you, they definitely feel firmer and I'd know" Flynn said, squeezing the top of one of Aaron's arms.

"Well, if you say so then it must be true" Aaron said crossing the room to sit on the bed. He watched as Flynn carried on getting ready but he knew he wouldn't be able to relax until he knew about Christmas.

"So, what are we up to tonight then?" Flynn asked, sitting next to Aaron to put his shoes on "Have you made your mind up yet?"

"Er, no not really. I wanted to talk to you about something first" Aaron replied. Flynn instantly stopped what he was doing and looked at his boyfriend.

"There's nothing wrong is there?"

Aaron smiled at him. "No, no it's nothing like that. I just wondered what you're doing for Christmas this year?"

"Well, we're not going away, I know that much" Flynn said sitting up straight and looking at Aaron.

"I suppose because you were with me last year, you'll be spending this one with your family."

"That's what they'd like" Flynn said thinking just ask me, please just ask me.

Aaron nodded his head. "Christmas never meant a lot to me but over the past couple of years, that's changed. When we brought Jackson home from the hospital, that Christmas Day was really special. Then last Christmas…"

"I gave you my heart" Flynn sang.

Aaron laughed. "If I remember rightly, it was more than just your heart you gave me." Flynn raised his eyebrows and smiled. "Last year was really special too" Aaron continued. "It was our first Christmas together and, I know it's selfish but I want you to spend this Christmas with me again in the village."

"Well that's a relief because I've already told mum and dad that I'd be spending Christmas with you" Flynn said.

"You did what?" Aaron said shocked.

"Well who else would I want to spend Christmas with apart from you? Last Christmas was special to me too you know. I'm just pleased you finally said something. I thought I was going to have to invite myself over to your place. Either that or just turn up unannounced again."

"So what did your mum and dad say?" Aaron asked, a feeling of happiness and relief flooding through him.

"They were alright about it, said they were expecting it but I did say we'd come over here Boxing Day, sort of a compromise. You don't mind do you?"

Aaron shook his head. "No course I don't." Flynn leant towards him and kissed him. Aaron pressed his lips firmly against Flynn's, rubbing his hand lightly across his chest before letting it come to rest on his stomach, kissing him harder as he felt Flynn's hand gently start to stroke his thigh. Before things got too heated, he pulled back. Flynn looked at him quizzically.

"Why don't we save this for later" Aaron said.

"Really?" Flynn asked.

"Yes really. I've been cooped up for weeks and we haven't been out together for ages. We could go for something to eat and then go to Bar West." He looked at Flynn pleadingly. "And you did say I could decide what we're doing tonight didn't you? What do you say?"

Flynn sighed. "I say that's the last time I ever let you decide what we're doing."

Aaron smiled at him. "Don't worry, it'll be worth the wait."

"It better be" Flynn said.

"It will be, I guarantee it."

Flynn couldn't help but smile. "Come on then, I'll phone a taxi."

When the taxi dropped them off in town, they went to a Chinese restaurant. They enjoyed their meal and when the waiter brought them the bill, he also gave them two fortune cookies. Flynn picked one of them up. "You're not actually going to read what's inside there are you?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah, it'll be a laugh. Let's see what words of wisdom they've got for us."

Aaron picked up the remaining one and opened it.

"You go first then" Aaron said. Flynn cleared his throat before reading.

"Follow your heart and you will always end up where you're supposed to be" he said.

"Oh please" Aaron said pulling a face.

Flynn laughed. "Right, come on then, let's hear yours" he said.

"He who is brave enough to ask the most difficult of questions will be rewarded for their bravery beyond their wildest dreams."

"That's a bit deeper than my one" Flynn said.

"Hmm" Aaron murmured. Somewhere in the depths of his mind, a little light went on, the words attaching themselves to a thought that he was finding harder and harder to ignore. After paying the bill, they left the restaurant and strolled up to Bar West. It was as packed as either of them had ever seen it but, as the Christmas Party season was in full swing, neither of them were surprised. Flynn was so proud to be with Aaron especially when he saw people throw admiring glances and looks at him. It was a great feeling to know that people wanted what he had exclusive access to. They fought their way through the crowds to get to the bar and stood patiently waiting to be served. Behind them, they heard a voice say "hello trouble." They both turned to see who had spoken. Flynn didn't recognise the pleasant looking guy with the brown hair and nice smile that was standing there but, judging by the grin that appeared on Aaron's face, he obviously did.

"Hiya mate, how are you?" Aaron asked.

"I'm alright, you?"

"Yeah, I'm good, really good." Aaron turned to Flynn and said "Flynn, this is Joe, he was Jackson's carer."

"Nice to meet you" Flynn said smiling, shaking Joe's outstretched hand.

"You too" Joe replied.

"It looks a bit less busy down that end of the bar" Flynn said "I'll go and get the drinks and come back. Can I get you one?" he asked Joe.

"No thanks, I'm alright with this" Joe replied.

"Right, back in a bit then" Flynn said placing his hand in the small of Aaron's back and rubbing it gently before squeezing past him. As Flynn made his way through the crowds, Aaron and Joe moved somewhere a little less crowded.

"So, what are you doing in here then? Something you'd like to confess" Aaron said.

"Works do, that's all so don't go getting any ideas" Joe said grinning.

"Still doing the same job then?" Aaron asked.

"Kind of. To be honest with you, after Jackson, I needed a change. I work with old people now instead. They're not quite as sarcastic and they don't give me half as much grief. So, what's happening with you then?"

"Not a lot, still working at the garage and I moved back in with Paddy."

"And Flynn, you and him, are you…."

Aaron grinned at him. "Yeah, two years next year."

"Really? Wow. What's your secret?"

"Well, when you're as good looking and naturally charming as I am, it's hard for people to resist." Joe laughed. "No, I'm just lucky I guess."

"Well, I'm pleased for you mate. Anyway, I better go back and find my lot. It was nice to see you again."

"Yeah, you too." As Joe left, he passed Flynn who was on his way back with the drinks.

"Here you go" he said handing a bottle to Aaron.

"Cheers" he said.

"You ok?" he asked.

"Never better. We're going to have a great Christmas" he said pulling Flynn close to kiss him. As he did, Flynn saw Aaron look at him in that way again, the way he'd looked at him when they'd been at his house that time. He still didn't know for sure what it meant but he knew how it made him feel. Both times he'd seen it, it had made his stomach somersault and his heartbeat race. They really enjoyed the rest of their evening out, they enjoyed being out together as a couple again but they enjoyed themselves even more when they got back to Flynn's. The physical attraction between them was as strong as it had always been but their lovemaking was now coupled with an unselfishness that saw both of them get nearly as much enjoyment from giving pleasure as receiving it. It was a mind blowing combination. As he lay in Flynn's arms afterwards, listening to his even breathing, the familiar contours of Flynn's body pressed against his, Aaron was hit by the realisation that he had never given himself so completely to anyone before, not even to Jackson and he didn't just mean sexually. As much as he had loved Jackson, he'd always held something back. He hadn't meant to, in fact, he hadn't even realised that he'd been doing it until he thought about what he was like with Flynn and then he could see the difference. The implications of how he felt were both exciting and scary, especially for someone of his age which was why, for the time being, he was keeping his thoughts to himself. He snuggled in closer to Flynn, closed his eyes and waited for sleep to arrive. He didn't have to wait for very long.

The next couple of weeks flew by and, before they knew it, Christmas Eve had arrived. After spending the afternoon just relaxing at Aaron's place, they spent the evening in the pub with Adam and Maddie, Marlon, Paddy, Chas and a lot of the other villagers. They had a brilliant evening although Flynn could have done without the half hour or so that he was cornered by Pearl and Betty, especially as he could see Aaron and the others over the women's shoulders and no one would rescue him. He did have to smile though when Aaron told him later that Pearl had been on her way to the ladies as Aaron was coming back from the gents and she had proceeded to tell him what a lovely young man Flynn was and how lucky he was to have him, not that he needed to be told. When they got back to Paddy's, Aaron got them both another drink and they settled down to watch a film before going to bed. Flynn was the first to stir on Christmas morning so he lay quietly and waited for Aaron to wake up. When he finally did wake up, they decided to open their presents straight away rather than wait for later. Afterwards, as neither of them were in a hurry to get up, they lay enjoying just being together.

"So, do you know whether we'll be watching The Wizard of Oz or The Sound of Music this afternoon?" Flynn asked.

Aaron pulled a face. "Hopefully neither."

"Oh, don't be like that, traditions are important."

"Hmmm, I suppose so" Aaron said grudgingly.

"And, er, are you going to the cemetery today?" Flynn said quietly. Aaron turned his head to look at him. "Well, one of us had to mention it" Flynn continued.

"Oh well I er, erm…"

"Aaron, it's fine. Don't let me being here stop you from doing what you want to do, what you'd usually do."

"Well, I went last year and I'd like to go but I promise I won't be long."

Flynn turned onto his side and looked at Aaron.

"Take as long as you want. I don't mind, you know that. I can get the veg ready or something, make myself useful."

Aaron smiled at him. "You really are the best you know that don't you?"

"Yeah I know" Flynn said kissing him. After breakfast, Aaron showered first so he could go to the cemetery while Flynn had his shower. When Flynn came downstairs afterwards, he found Paddy and Chas in the kitchen.

"Alright love, Happy Christmas" Chas said hugging him.

"Same to you" Flynn replied. Paddy made them a drink while they waited for Aaron to return. They heard the door open and close and Aaron came into the kitchen.

"Alright, what are you doing here at this time?" he said when he saw his mum.

"And it's lovely to see you too" Chas said. "I thought I'd come over to give you your Christmas present if that's alright. Well, it's a joint present from me and Paddy isn't it?" She looked at Paddy who nodded his head.

"Oh, right, so where is it then?" Aaron said a smile lighting up his face.

"Well, it's not exactly something you can wrap up" Paddy said.

"Yeah and we wanted to get you something you'd really enjoy, well, we hope you'll really enjoy it" Chas said a bit nervously.

"Ok, so why don't you tell me what it is and then I can tell you if I'll enjoy it" he said sitting down next to Flynn.

Chas took a deep breath. She was never sure what sort of reaction she was going to get from Aaron and she just hoped she and Paddy hadn't got this one wrong.

"Right, we've decided we're going to pay for you to go away for a little break" she said.

"Away where?" Aaron said.

Chas suddenly felt nervous. It had seemed like a good idea when she and Paddy had talked about it but now she wasn't so sure. She looked at Paddy who said "We thought you might like to go to Portugal, maybe visit Hazel."

Aaron sat looking from his mum to Paddy, too stunned to speak. Whatever he'd been expecting them to say, it hadn't been that. He looked at Flynn who smiled at him and rubbed his leg reassuringly.

"Well don't get too excited now will you?" Chas said.

"Maybe we should tell him the second bit while he's quiet, what do you think?" Paddy said to Chas.

Aaron just looked at the two of them, still too shocked to say anything.

"We thought you might like to bring someone with you" Chas said looking from Aaron to Flynn "so we're paying for two tickets."

"You're paying for me to go as well" Flynn said just as stunned now as Aaron was.

"Unless he wants to take someone else. He's not going to want to go on his own is he? We've spoken to Hazel and she said you can stay at her place. She'll go and stay with a friend so you can have the place to yourselves, turn it into a proper holiday for both of you. You just tell us when you want to go and we'll pay for the flights." Aaron and Flynn grinned at each other unable to believe their luck.

"Aaron, love, you've still not said anything" Chas said with a nervous laugh.

Aaron looked at her, jumped up out of the chair and threw his arms around her. "Thank you, that's brilliant" he said "just brilliant."

"Oh, thank god for that. I thought for a minute we'd done the wrong thing again" she said.

"Not this time" he said hugging Paddy too. "You couldn't have done anything better. Right, I'm going to go and speak to Hazel. Are you coming?" he asked Flynn.

"No, you go. I'll be up in a minute."

With a final smile at everyone, Aaron ran upstairs.

"I don't know what to say, I wasn't even expecting a present never mind a trip to Portugal. Thank you" Flynn said.

"You're welcome" Chas said. "You're part of the family now god help you, we wouldn't leave you out."

"Yeah but a holiday, wow."

"Just make sure you enjoy it" Paddy said.

For the rest of the day, all Flynn and Aaron could talk about was the holiday they would now be able to take. They were still talking about it when they went to bed that night.

"I still can't believe what Mum and Paddy are going to do. How amazing is that?" Aaron said.

"I know, I'm still stunned too. And Hazel really doesn't mind us using her place?"

"No, she said she can't wait to see the look on her neighbour's face when she moves out and us two move in for a week or two" Aaron said climbing in to bed.

"Yeah well just make sure you use sun cream this time. I'm not listening to you whining all the time we're there because you got burnt again" Flynn said smiling as he got into bed next to him.

"Yeah yeah, alright, I'll remember" Aaron mumbled. They lay in silence for a couple of minutes before Aaron spoke again.

"Do you remember this time last year?" he asked.

"Like I'm ever going to forget" Flynn replied "I don't think I've ever been so nervous about anything in my life before."

"Me either. You were brilliant that night though."

"Well you weren't so bad yourself" Flynn said grinning at him.

"I'm not talking about that" Aaron said nudging him "although we were pretty good together I agree. I'm talking about how you were with me before anything happened. I can still remember exactly what you said to me and it really meant a lot."

"Come here you" Flynn said pulling Aaron into a hug and holding him tightly.

"I said what I said that night because it was the truth and because I love you, simple as that, and I always will." Young though he was, he was as certain of that fact as he was that there were seven days in a week and that day follows night. As their lips met and their tongues battled with each other, as their hands stroked, touched and teased each others bodies invoking feelings and sensations in the other one that no one else ever had before, both of them knew that what they had was really special, something that couldn't be replicated with anyone else and something they were determined to hang on to forever.


	46. Chapter 46

January and February were horrible months. All the euphoria of Christmas and New Year was gone and all that was left were two months of nothingness, just plodding along waiting for the bone chilling cold to disappear and be replaced by a bit of sunshine and a glimpse of better days to come. Aaron had been working hard at the garage but not today. Today he had other things on his mind apart from replacing the alternator on the car that was due to be collected in a couple of hours. He was worried about Flynn. His behaviour recently just hadn't been very Flynn like. There were no problems between them as far he could tell so he was left wondering what was up with his usually easy going boyfriend. Whenever he asked him what was wrong, Flynn clammed up, telling him that it was nothing, that he was fine but Aaron knew him well enough to know that that just wasn't true. He'd been really snappy with him as well although he was always quick to apologise and he was permanently tired. When he'd stayed over the other night, he had had such a restless night that if the two of them had got a few hours sleep between them, they were lucky. Aaron was worried that if it carried on, Flynn would make himself really ill. He needed to know what the problem was so he could try to help. Flynn was due to come over that night and Aaron had an idea which he hoped would sort things out. All he needed was Paddy's co operation and a few bits from the shop.

As Flynn drove over to Aaron's place, he was so shattered that despite the freezing temperature, he had the window open and cold air blowing out of the fans in his car to help him concentrate. He knew it wasn't a great idea to be driving, not considering how he felt but his need to see Aaron for a couple of hours, to try and relax for a bit and forget about the pressure he felt under was too strong to ignore. He hadn't told Aaron because he felt stupid but it had just hit him how important the next few months were going to be. It wasn't just his future that rested on him doing well anymore, it was their future, his and Aaron's and he was terrified he'd fail. His college workload had increased dramatically, his deadlines for handing work in were coming round quicker and quicker and he just couldn't seem to switch off. He wanted a decent night's sleep so badly but with a million things flying around his head every single night, there was no chance of that happening. He'd even started sniping at Aaron, who never seemed to mind but that didn't make it right. He pulled up outside Aaron's place, turned the engine off and sat for a couple of minutes before getting out of the car and knocking on the door. Paddy opened it and let him in.

"Blimey, you look exhausted, you should tell Aaron to let you sleep at night" Paddy said jovially. Flynn thought that the way he was feeling, he could just about manage to raise a smile never mind anything else. "Aaron's upstairs sulking by the way" Paddy continued, oblivious to Flynn's mood. Flynn sighed, great, this was all he needed.

"Why, what's up with him?"

"He's got a cob on because I wouldn't go out tonight. He said you wanted the house to yourselves but it's freezing out there and it's a small village. There's not that many places I can go and I just wanted a night in front of the TV. My favourite programme's on later. I tried to explain but he just stormed off upstairs. Look, I try to give you as much space as I can but, at the end of the day this is my house."

Flynn nodded. "I know and we do appreciate it. I'll have a word" he muttered. As he walked upstairs, he could feel himself getting angrier. So much for a relaxing couple of hours he thought. He walked into the bedroom and found Aaron lying on his bed.

"I suppose Paddy's jumped in and told you about earlier. Got his side in before I get a chance to give you mine" Aaron said. Normally, Flynn would have listened to Aaron before saying anything but not tonight.

"Why do you have to make things difficult?" he asked "Paddy's always been good to us, he does what he can but it's his house not yours, you need to remember that."

Aaron looked at Flynn surprised at his attitude. "Hang on a minute, don't talk to me like I'm a child" he snapped unable to stop himself.

"Says you lying up here sulking like one" Flynn snapped back. "Look, there's nothing we can do about it and being rude to Paddy isn't going to help, it's just stupid."

"So now I'm stupid as well as childish am I?" Aaron retorted, wondering how their evening had got off to such a bad start in such a short space of time.

"I said your behaviour was stupid, not you're stupid. Do you know what, I don't need this Aaron. I've got enough on my plate without you adding to it."

Aaron sat up and looked at him. "Do you think I don't know that? Look, I wanted the house to ourselves just so we could spend some time on our own outside of this room. That's why I reacted the way I did towards Paddy tonight when he said he wouldn't go out. See those bags over there?" Aaron asked nodding his head towards two carrier bags on the floor. Flynn nodded. "In there is some beer, a couple of your favourite DVD's, some popcorn and those horrible crisp things that you like."

"The ones that you hate" Flynn said quietly.

"Yeah those ones. I just thought if we had the whole place to ourselves, you might relax enough to tell me what's wrong with you because I know something is."

Flynn rubbed at his eyes before meeting Aaron's blue eyes with his. "I'm sorry" he said.

"Don't be sorry, just talk to me" Aaron said. Flynn walked over and sat down next to him. Aaron sat in silence as Flynn told him how worried he was about his college work not being good enough, how there was so much to do he didn't think he could get through it, how scared he was that if he didn't get his degree, they would never have enough money to be able to live together and how he couldn't sleep because of all the worry. Aaron, relieved to finally know what the problem was reassured him as best he could, telling him that he believed in him and that, even if he didn't get his degree and ended up stacking shelves in a supermarket, they'd still find a way to be together. As Flynn lay cuddled up to Aaron, he felt more relaxed than he had done in ages.

"I'm sorry for not telling you sooner and for being horrible to you" he said.

"Don't be daft, even you being horrible isn't really that horrible now is it?" Aaron replied. "Listen why don't we tell my mum and Paddy that we'd like to take them up on their offer, go to Portugal for that holiday. It'll give you a chance to chill out for a bit."

"Sounds lovely but I couldn't do it. I'd just worry about what I was coming back to. We're better off leaving it until the course is over, if you don't mind, then I can really relax and the weather will be better then too."

"Ok, whatever you want" Aaron said stroking Flynn's back gently. Flynn turned to look at him.

"I tell you what we could do though. You know I've got to go away again in a couple of weeks."

"Don't remind me" Aaron groaned "Two weeks this time isn't it?"

"Yeah, afraid so. Two weeks in Newcastle. Working all day on a placement and work to do at night as well isn't my idea of fun either but why don't we see if we can keep the hotel room for the weekend, pay for it ourselves and have a weekend up there?"

Aaron grinned at him. "Now that sounds like a plan" he said. "D'you fancy a beer?" Flynn nodded. "I think I'll get them from downstairs though, those'll be warm by now" Aaron said giving him a quick kiss. When he got back, Flynn was fast asleep. Aaron decided to leave him and went back downstairs again. As he went into the living room, Paddy turned away from the TV and looked at him.

"Alright, where's Flynn?" he asked.

"Asleep" Aaron replied, sitting down next to him, handing him one of the bottles he was holding.

"At this time?" Paddy said checking his watch "Is he ok?"

"He will be. Look, he's had a lot on his mind recently and he's not been sleeping. I wanted the house tonight just so we didn't have to be in my room all night, so that we could relax down here and talk. That's why I reacted the way I did when you said you wouldn't go out. I'm sorry."

"Why didn't you say something, I feel terrible now. I thought you just wanted me out of the way so you could, well, you know."

Aaron shook his head. "This may surprise you Paddy but we're not always at it when you're not here."

"Who are you trying to kid, I was your age once you know."

"No you weren't, you were born middle aged" Aaron said pulling a face at him.

"Oi, we'll have less of that thank you" Paddy said.

"Mind you, having said that, it's a good job this sofa can't talk or it would have a few tales to tell" Aaron said looking directly at Paddy.

Paddy wrinkled his nose before looking down at the sofa and the cushions. Aaron burst out laughing. "Relax Paddy, I'm winding you up" he said.

"Thank god for that" Paddy uttered quietly.

"Yeah, it's the kitchen table that's seen the most action" Aaron said, raising his eyebrows and helping himself to some crisps. Paddy opened and shut his mouth before deciding to ignore Aaron's last remark.

"You should have told me you know" he said again.

"Yeah well, it's sorted now, that's the main thing" Aaron said smiling at him, settling down to watch TV. He woke Flynn up a couple of hours later to give him the option of going home but he declined. Instead, he just got undressed and fell asleep again in Aaron's arms.

Two weeks later, on a Friday evening, Aaron found himself driving up a busy motorway heading towards Newcastle on his way to see Flynn. He could have taken a train but he didn't want to be tied to a timetable. By driving, they could spend as much time as possible with each other. Flynn was back to his old self, which was a relief and they were really looking forward to spending the weekend together. When Aaron arrived at the hotel, Flynn was waiting for him in the bar. Their faces broke out into the biggest grins you could imagine when they saw each other. They gave each other a hug before Flynn asked if he wanted a drink. When Aaron said not down here, Flynn left his drink unfinished and they went up to the room. They went in and Flynn closed the door behind them as Aaron dropped his bag on the floor. Without speaking, they kissed each other, both of them glad to be together again.

"So, have you missed me then?" Flynn asked.

"Nah, not at all" Aaron replied smiling. "Why, have you missed me?"

"Never thought about you once" Flynn replied. "I'll get you that drink" he said going to walk away but Aaron stopped him. "I'm not really that fussed about a drink" he said, pulling Flynn in to kiss him again. With Flynn's tongue in his mouth and his hands roaming over his body, Aaron was in heaven. He pushed his hand under Flynn's polo shirt and lazily played with one of his nipples, feeling Flynn shiver as it grew hard under his touch. Part of him wanted to rip Flynn's clothes off right now and throw him onto the bed but another part of him wanted to take it slowly, to enjoy teasing him and making him wait. His mind was made up for him, however,when Flynn forced him backwards onto the bed and began tearing at his clothes, trailing kisses over his bare skin. As their clothes were removed, their kisses became more demanding, their need for each other growing with every passing second. Aaron looked at Flynn's naked body, determined to become familiar with every last inch of it again before he was finished and wondered, not for the first time, why the muscle tone in Flynn's lower abdomen looked almost like an arrow, drawing his eyes downwards, like he needed to be told where to look to find what would give him the most pleasure. He glanced up and saw Flynn watching him with a small smile on his face. He smiled back at him before bringing his mouth down on Flynn's, kissing him almost brutally, before working his way down his body, kissing, biting, sucking as he went, following the arrow until his destination was reached.

Aaron was in a playful mood, taking Flynn so far before stopping, turning his attention to other parts of his body for a while before returning to tease him again. Every time he did it, he took Flynn a bit further, made him think this would be the moment that he would get what he wanted before leaving him unfulfilled. Flynn's body was on fire, his mind unable to cope with what Aaron was doing to him. When Aaron stopped again, he moaned barely able to contain himself. "Az, please just do it" he begged "I can't take much more." Aaron looked at him and smiled. In all the time they'd been together, Flynn had only called him that a handful of times and it was always when he was in the state he was in now, when all rational thought had left him. If anyone else had shortened his name, he wouldn't have liked it but, when Flynn did it, he liked it a lot. He moved up to pacify him with a kiss. Flynn could taste himself on Aaron's lips and on his tongue when he welcomed it into his mouth and it did nothing to help him at all. As Aaron worked his way slowly back down his body, Flynn closed his eyes and waited for the end of the delicious torture that he'd been enduring. He sighed as he felt Aaron's hand and mouth begin to work in unison again, taking him closer to what he so badly craved. Aaron knew Flynn's body as well as he knew his own. He could tell that Flynn was close, that he wouldn't be able to hold out for much longer. He expertly picked up the pace, taking Flynn past the point of no return. He watched Flynn's chest rising and falling as his breathing quickened, he watched the constantly changing expressions on Flynn's face as he showed exactly what he was feeling and noticed the subtle changes in Flynn's body that told him this wasn't going to take very long at all. Aaron closed his eyes again and carried on, listening as Flynn cried out, his body going into spasm after spasm as Aaron finally gave him the release he so desperately needed.

Very gently, Aaron let go and, placing featherlike soft kisses over Flynn's trembling body worked his way up until he reached Flynn's lips, kissing them softly. Gone were the brutal, hard demanding kisses of a turned on lover, replaced now by the soothing, tender kisses of a boyfriend who'd just shared something really special with the man he loved. There was something about these after intimacy kisses and how they made him feel that he couldn't put into words. He lay on his side next to Flynn, his arm draped casually across Flynn's stomach as he left him to recover. After a little while, Flynn opened his eyes and smiled at him. Aaron smiled shyly back, bizarre considering he'd been anything but shy a few moments ago but Flynn's smile still made him feel that way sometimes. "Wow" Flynn said "I'm going to have to keep going away if that's what I get when we see each other again."

Aaron shook his head. "No, that was to show you what you'll be missing if you go away again." Flynn turned on to his side and pulled Aaron into a hug. "Don't worry, after next week, I'm not going away on my own ever again." Flynn kissed him tenderly, holding him close, their naked bodies pressed together. With his recovery complete, Flynn's thoughts turned to Aaron and what he wanted to do to him. He kissed him again, gently at first, then harder, his hands tracing lightly over Aaron's body. Aaron sighed as Flynn's hands moved lower, anticipation flooding through him as he knew it was his turn now to be teased, tormented and toyed with. "My turn now" Flynn said with a glint in his eye, letting his fingers completely bypass where Aaron wanted them to stop before dragging them gently up the inside of Aaron's thigh. Aaron groaned as yet again, they stopped short of where he wanted Flynn to put them.

"You're going to make me suffer aren't you?" Aaron said.

"After what you just did to me, too right" Flynn said, moving to kiss him again. He was going to enjoy this, nearly as much as Aaron was.

The following morning, after breakfast, they used Flynn's laptop to find a gay bar they could go to that night. They found one that looked alright not too far from where they were staying so they decided to give it a try. They went out for the day, enjoying being somewhere new and spending time on their own again. When they got back to the room, they put the TV on and lay on the bed relaxing, killing time, Aaron in his favourite position with his head on Flynn's chest.

"I want to get a tattoo done" he suddenly blurted out.

"You what?" Flynn said surprised "you've never said."

"Well, I have now, haven't I?"

"You do know they're permanent don't you?"

"Are they? So that's why no matter how many times you shower, your's never comes off. Thanks for clearing that up for me" Aaron said slapping Flynn playfully.

"I just meant you have to be really sure about it, that's all."

"I am."

"So, come on then, what are you having done?"

"I'm not telling you, you'll just have to wait and see."

"Ooh, I love it when you go all mysterious on me" Flynn said, tickling him.

"Get off" Aaron said laughing.

"Just promise me you won't do a Beckham and end up covered in them" Flynn said.

"As if, I just want the one. Besides, I thought you liked David Beckham if you were going for an older man that is."

"I do, I just think he's gone too far with all his tattoos that's all."

"Bet you still wouldn't say no though would you?" Aaron asked, grinning at him.

"Who in their right mind would say no to him? Even you wouldn't turn down a bit of sex with Becks."

"I might do" Aaron said trying to look serious.

"Yeah right. I've seen you looking at those posters in the shop and you weren't checking out his hair."

"Well, it's difficult not to look when it's staring you in the face isn't it?"

"So, I'm right then, you wouldn't say no" Flynn said mischievously.

"Alright, alright, I wouldn't say no ok but only if he didn't speak. That voice would do my head in and, on that note, I'm going for a shower" Aaron said kissing Flynn as he got off the bed. When Flynn came out of the shower some time later, he walked in to the room drying his hair with a towel. He looked over at Aaron and stopped in his tracks. Aaron was just finishing getting dressed. He was wearing boots, jeans and a shirt and Flynn was blown away by how gorgeous he looked. Aaron looked at him shyly. "What?" he said "Do I look stupid or something?"

"No, not at all" Flynn said "you look great. Are they all new?"

Aaron blushed. "Yeah, I er bought them last week."

"You went shopping, voluntarily, for new clothes" Flynn asked. "Right, who are you and what have you done with my Aaron" he said smiling.

"Very funny" Aaron said, "I just figured I needed some new stuff that's all. Are you sure I look alright?" Aaron said, pulling at his shirt.

"You look more than alright" Flynn said pulling him into a kiss. Flynn finished getting dressed and they went out, first for something to eat, then round a couple of pubs before making their way to the bar. It was really busy with good music and it had a nice feeling about it. Flynn was well on the way to being absolutely hammered so Aaron eased up on the drinking to keep an eye on him. He figured after the way that Flynn had been feeling, he deserved to let his hair down. Flynn dragged him onto the dance floor a few times but he didn't really mind. If it made Flynn happy, it was alright with him. They had a great night and he couldn't remember the last time they'd laughed so much. At the end of the night, they got a taxi back to the hotel. Flynn was telling Aaron some story about what a bloke at the bar had said to him but he was talking as if Aaron was miles away, not right next to him.

"Will you keep it down, you'll wake the whole hotel" Aaron said as they walked towards the lifts.

"Sorry" Flynn said in that exaggerated whisper that drunk people often speak in. Once they got up to their room, Aaron asked Flynn for the key card.

"The what?" Flynn asked looking thoroughly confused.

"The thing that looks like a bankcard that you use to open the door" Aaron said.

"I think it's in my wallet" Flynn said.

"Well get it out then" Aaron said. Flynn just looked at him. "What are you like" Aaron muttered putting his hands into Flynn's back pockets, pulling out his wallet.

"If I'd known you were going to do that, I'd have put it in my front pocket" Flynn said grinning.

"Would you now? Come on, in you go" Aaron said smiling at him, gently pushing him into the room shutting the door behind them. Flynn flopped down on to the bed and kicked his shoes off.

"Here, drink this" Aaron said holding out a glass.

Flynn took it and gulped a couple of mouthfuls. "Urgh, that's disgusting, I'm not drinking that. What is it by the way?" he asked.

"Water" Aaron said "now get it down you. You'll thank me in the morning." Grudgingly, Flynn emptied the glass and handed it back to Aaron. Aaron refilled it and handed it back to him. "More" Flynn said "do I have to?"

"If you want to feel remotely like a human tomorrow, then yeah you do" Aaron said. Flynn pulled a face but drank it all anyway. When Aaron came out of the bathroom, Flynn was already in bed. "I thought you'd be snoring your head off by now" he said. Flynn just shook his head.

"Oh, I see, even when you're drunk some things never change do they?" Aaron said as he started to take his own clothes off. Flynn grinned. "I might be drunk, very drunk actually but do you really think I'd miss the chance to watch you get undressed?"

"Perv" Aaron said.

"Yeah well, as looking's about all I'm fit for tonight, can you just get on with it please" Flynn pleaded. Aaron smiled, took off the remainder of his clothes and climbed into bed next to him. Flynn cuddled up to him and moaned.

"You alright" Aaron asked "You're not going to be sick are you?"

"No, I'm just waiting for the room to stop spinning" Flynn mumbled. He looked at Aaron. "You're really special Aaron, you do know that don't you? If every bloke on this planet was gay and I could pick any one of them to be with, I'd still pick you."

"Behave yourself will you" Aaron said laughing.

"But it's true, I would" Flynn said.

"Tell me when you're sober and I might believe you" Aaron said sleepily "now get some sleep" he said kissing Flynn goodnight.

The following morning, Flynn woke up with a terrible hangover. Aaron wasn't overly sympathetic and couldn't resist winding Flynn up a bit, enjoying the fact that it was Flynn who was suffering this time, not him. They went out to get a bit of fresh air and something to eat and by the time they got back, Flynn was feeling a bit more human. While they were watching TV, they were both quiet, knowing that their weekend was nearly over. Neither of them wanted it to end but they knew that it had to. Aaron checked his watch and sighed.

"Right, I better make a move" he said getting off the bed.

"What already?" Flynn asked.

"Afraid so." He had one final look around to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything before putting his jacket on. Flynn walked over to him and gave him a hug.

"Thanks for one of the best weekends I've had in ages" he said.

"Yeah, it was a good one wasn't it?" Aaron replied. They looked at each other with a mixture of happiness and sadness in their eyes before kissing goodbye.

"Call me when you get back" Flynn said.

"Course" Aaron said reaching for the door.

"Aaron" Flynn called. Aaron turned round to face him.

"If every bloke on this planet was gay and I could pick anyone to be with, I'd still pick you."

Aaron smiled at him. "So you do remember some things from last night then."

"Yeah, some things and I'm completely sober now. So, do you believe me?" he questioned.

Aaron nodded. "Yeah, I do." He came back across the room and kissed Flynn one more time before heading back home, back to what he knew would be one of the longest weeks of his life.


	47. Chapter 47

Flynn took one final look around the hotel room before grabbing his stuff and shutting the door behind him. It was just after lunchtime and he was about to set off back home, back to Aaron. He'd really missed him, especially after the excellent weekend they'd had together and, although speaking on the phone every morning and every night was great, it wasn't the same as seeing each other and spending time together. He checked out of the hotel, got into his car and began the long drive home. He thought about phoning Aaron to let him know he was on his way back but decided against it, wanting to surprise him instead. With the sun shining and the knowledge that he wouldn't have to go away for his college course ever again, he was in a great mood. Singing along to the CD in his car, the miles flew by and for a Friday afternoon, the traffic wasn't too bad. After travelling for a while, he glanced at the signpost by the side of the motorway and was pleasantly surprised to find he was less than an hour from home. Suddenly, in front of him, he saw every car's brake lights come on as traffic slowed down and then ground to a halt. Up ahead, he could see flashing blue lights, hear sirens wailing in the distance and he knew there'd been an accident. After twenty minutes of not moving an inch, the traffic finally started to crawl forward. He was able to see all the emergency vehicles up ahead, the ambulances, fire engines and police cars. As the traffic was funnelled past the accident, he glanced to his left seeing a couple of cars in the ditch by the side of the road, one on it's roof surrounded by a flurry of activity. Flynn's thoughts turned to the accident victims and he hoped it wasn't as bad as it looked. In that split second, he was reminded how fragile life is, how you never know how many tomorrows you're going to get and it made him shiver. He thought of Aaron, the love of his life and he vowed to make every second that they spent together count. Although he hadn't eaten since breakfast, he decided not to stop at the service station like he had planned to do. Instead, he decided to keep going and get back to the village as soon as he could.

When he arrived back, he parked his car outside Smithy Cottage and walked down to the garage. Aaron was working on a car, his head stuck under the bonnet. He turned when he heard footsteps approaching and couldn't believe his eyes when he saw Flynn.

"What are you doing here? I wasn't expecting you until tonight" Aaron said grinning at him, taking off the oily gloves he was wearing.

"We finished early so I thought I'd surprise you" Flynn replied grinning back, readily accepting the hug that Aaron gave him. "Are you on your own?" he asked. Aaron shook his head. "Shame" Flynn said giving Aaron the briefest of kisses "That'll have to do til later then." Aaron had a quick look over at the small office where he knew Cain was working before pulling Flynn into a long tender kiss, the sort of kiss they both wanted to share after being apart for so long. Cain, having come out of the office when he heard voices saw the two of them and stayed where he was, hidden from view, giving them a few seconds before coming out onto the forecourt.

"So, Romeo returns, I thought I heard voices" he said. Flynn smiled at him before turning his attention back to Aaron. "Don't suppose there's any chance of you finishing early is there?"

Aaron turned hopefully to Cain. "I don't know, is there?" he asked.

"Sorry, those eyes of yours might make him agree to your every demand but they don't work on me especially when that motor needs sorting today."

"Can't you finish it off for me?"

"I could do if I wasn't going to be changing the plugs on that one over there and they're both being picked up later so sorry, nothing I can do." Aaron turned back to Flynn. "What do you want to do then? Wait in the pub for me?" he asked, unable to keep the disappointment out of his voice.

"Nah, I'd rather wait here" Flynn said "You don't mind do you?" he said looking at Cain "I won't distract him."

"You're breathing aren't you? That's enough to distract him." Cain looked from one to the other of them. "Alright you can stay if you like but if you're going to be hanging around here, you might as well make yourself useful. Kettle's in there, milk and two sugars for me and I'm sure you know how Aaron likes it" he said, smirking.

"Course I know how Aaron likes it" Flynn replied as he walked past Cain "why do you think we've been together for so long?"

"We better still be talking about making a brew here" Cain shouted after him. Flynn looked back over his shoulder, raised his eyebrows and smiled.

"Get him, he's come out of his shell hasn't he?" Cain said turning to Aaron who was back working under the bonnet of the car.

"Yeah well, he's been around long enough now to know that your bark's worse than your bite." Cain's only response was to clip Aaron round the ear as he walked past.

Flynn brought out the mugs of tea a couple of minutes later and, true to his word, left Aaron to get on with his work. Once Aaron had finished, he cleaned up and they went to the pub for something to eat. As they walked up the road afterwards, Flynn said to Aaron " So, when do I get to see this tattoo then?"

"Later" Aaron replied.

"You still haven't told me anything about it. Is it Aaron and Flynn forever in a heart?" Flynn asked.

Aaron tutted. "You've gone and spoiled the surprise now" he said pretending to sulk.

"I hope it's not some foreign writing that's supposed to say something really nice but actually says my cat's got fleas" Flynn said.

Aaron burst out laughing. "Funnily enough, I did think about doing that, I had something in mind and everything but in the end I decided against it. I mean, like you said, they could tattoo anything couldn't they, I wouldn't know."

"So what words did you have in mind then?"

"Does it matter?" He looked at Flynn's face and knew that he wasn't going to let it drop. "Alright, if you really want to know, I'll tell you later."

"Blimey, you'll tell me later, you'll show me later, we're going to be busy later aren't we?" Flynn said.

"That's the plan, yeah" Aaron said leaning in to give Flynn a quick kiss which soon turned into a much longer one.

"Oi, get a room you two" they suddenly heard shouted at them. They looked up to see Adam waiting at the bus stop with a smile on his face. "It's a good job it's only me standing here, not Edna or Pearl on their way to Bingo. The shock might have killed them."

"Well, Edna maybe but I think Pearl would have secretly enjoyed it" Aaron said with a wink. Adam laughed and said to Flynn "So, how was Newcastle then? Glad to be back?"

"It was alright, it had it's moments but it's always good to come home" he said, looking at Aaron who smiled back at him before turning his attention to Adam.

"So, where are you off to then, seeing Maddie?" he asked.

"Yeah, takeaway and a DVD" Adam said flatly.

"And you sound as if you're really looking forward to it" Flynn said.

"I am, it's just I'd be looking forward to it more if I was choosing the DVD. It's her choice and I just know I'm going to have to sit through some chick flick." Aaron and Flynn smiled at each other. "Holly and Hannah were watching one the other night" Adam continued "you should have heard the pair of them wailing. Then when it was over, they said that it was lovely, they really enjoyed it. How can they have enjoyed it, it made them cry. Why do girls like films like that, I don't get it."

"Like we could help with what girls think" Aaron said.

"See, you two don't know how lucky you are. You don't have to watch those sort of films, you don't have to wait ages while they get ready, you don't have to put up with the one week a month where they turn into a completely different person and want to eat their bodyweight in chocolate or have to cope with the p.m.t. beforehand."

"I wouldn't be so sure about that" Flynn said "there's been times where it's like he's had permanent p.m.t. believe me."

"Yeah and how long did you keep me waiting the other week because your hair wouldn't go right?" Aaron retorted, screwing his face up as he spoke "and you changed your shirt three times before we went out because you weren't happy with how you looked so you can wind your neck in for a start." Adam couldn't help but laugh.

"Anyway" Aaron continued looking back at Adam "I bet you're just worried that it'll be you doing the crying."

"Me cry at a film, no chance. Hard as nails me."

"Yeah, course you are" Aaron said. Just then the bus came round the bend in the road.

"Right, I'll see you boys later then" Adam called over his shoulder "We'll have to go for a beer sometime."

"Yeah, you can tell us how many boxes of tissues you got through" Aaron shouted after him. Adam turned around, stuck two fingers up at him and got on the bus. Aaron and Flynn went into Smithy Cottage, Flynn sitting down at the table while Aaron went to the fridge to get them a beer. He handed one to Flynn before sitting down with him.

"So, come on then, show me" Flynn said.

"I can't, not down here. If Paddy came in, he'd wonder what he was walking in on."

"Why, where is it?" Flynn asked looking a bit worried.

"Not anywhere near there, don't worry" Aaron said.

"So, show it to me upstairs then." Just as they stood up, Paddy came in. Although they'd have preferred to be on their own right now, they didn't want to be rude either so they stayed and had a chat with him while they finished their beer. Once upstairs, Flynn kicked his trainers off and sat on the bed, looking expectantly at Aaron. "Well, come on then, the suspense is killing me" he said.

"And I thought you were the patient one" Aaron replied as he sat down next to him, taking his t shirt off to reveal his tattoo to Flynn for the first time. It was in the same position as Flynn's but slightly bigger. It was of two seahorses facing each other. "So, what do you think?" Aaron asked.

"It looks brilliant. They've done a really good job" Flynn said running his fingers lightly over the skin. "But, why seahorses?"

Aaron smiled shyly at him. "Because certain types of seahorses mate for life, I saw it on one of Paddy's programmes once and it made me think of us. I mean I don't want to be with anyone else and you feel the same way about me don't you?"

"You know I do" Flynn said squeezing Aaron's hand.

"I only wanted a tattoo if it was going to mean something and nothing means more to me than you."

Flynn smiled at him. "Even after all this time together, you still manage to surprise me. I'm genuinely touched Aaron."

"That's a relief because it'd cost a fortune if I ever had to get rid of it."

"Just out of curiosity, if you'd gone for the writing, what would it have said? You did say you'd tell me." Aaron blushed, making him even more adorable than Flynn already thought he was.

"If you laugh, I'll never forgive you" he said.

"I won't" Flynn said shaking his head.

"It would have said all day on my mind, all night in my dreams because, when we're not together, that's what you are."

Flynn's breath caught in his throat. "You're such a softie at times" he said fixing his eyes on Aaron's.

"Only where you're concerned" Aaron whispered pressing his lips against Flynn's. With their lips fused together, Aaron used his weight to force Flynn backwards until they were both lying on the bed, arms around each other, legs entwined. Their kisses were slow and lingering, neither wanting to rush anything, their heads at the moment still in control. Aaron's hands roamed over Flynn's body, first over his clothing, then under his t shirt before removing it and throwing it on the floor. Feeling Flynn's warm smooth skin touching his own, Aaron moved his mouth away from Flynn's and let his head fall to one side, offering Flynn his neck which he gently bit and sucked before moving back to Aaron's mouth again, using his tongue to prise open Aaron's lips. Flynn had never been a huge fan of trackie bottoms even though Aaron practically lived in them but he had to admit they did offer something that his jeans didn't, ease of access. While Aaron was still fumbling with his belt and then his button and his zip, Flynn had already slipped his hand inside the elasticated waistband of Aaron's trackies, inside Aaron's boxers and had started to gently massage his balls. Aaron stopped what he was doing and sighed, lost in the pleasure of what Flynn was doing to him until he felt Flynn thrust himself against his hand, gently reminding him that he wanted some attention too. They were both as hard as each other, eager to get naked now and enjoy each other's bodies again, lost in their own little world until the sound of Paddy calling Aaron's name brought them crashing back to the real world again. They looked at each other and both groaned but for all the wrong reasons. Aaron rested his forehead against Flynn's shoulder for a few seconds before reluctantly disentangling himself and marching over to the door. He yanked it open and bellowed "What!"

"I've just had a call from Adam" Paddy said "there's some sort of emergency up at the farm, he needs me up there straight away."

Aaron turned to Flynn with a puzzled look on his face. Unless Adam had miraculously developed the ability to be in two places at once, Paddy was lying. "I'll try not to disturb you when I get back" Paddy called up the stairs a few seconds before they heard the front door slam. Aaron closed the bedroom door and turned to face Flynn who was propped up on his elbows, legs apart straight out in front of him, jeans still open. He was looking at Aaron with a coy smile on his face. "What's this, your come and get me look" Aaron asked as he walked back across the room.

"No, this is my I'm waiting so get your arse back into bed look although if it says come and get me, then that's fine too" Flynn said pulling Aaron down on top of him and kissing him.

"What d'you reckon that was all about?" Aaron asked gently stroking Flynn's chest.

"It's obvious isn't it, he's giving us some space. Probably doesn't want a repeat of what happened a few weeks ago."

"Don't remind me" Aaron said shaking his head "I never want another atmosphere at breakfast like that again."

"Yeah well, that's what happens when you decide you have to have me at two o clock in the morning. I told you to keep it down."

"Yeah but you didn't tell me to leave you alone did you and you weren't exactly silent yourself " Aaron said using a finger to tease one of Flynn's nipples.

"Fine we were as bad as each other" Flynn murmured in between kisses "but being quiet isn't something we've got to worry about now is it?" he said pulling Aaron's trackies and boxers down in one swift movement. Aaron grinned at him. "No, I suppose not" he said.

When they woke up the next morning, they lay talking for a while until Aaron threw on some boxers and went downstairs to make them a drink. Paddy was sitting in the kitchen drinking tea.

"Alright" Aaron mumbled as he put the kettle on. "Yeah, you" Paddy said looking up. Aaron nodded.

"Hang on a minute, where did that come from?" Paddy asked nodding towards Aaron's tattoo "I've not noticed that before."

"From the tattoo fairy" Aaron said, "she's the tooth fairy's more talented sister. See, you leave the design and where you want it under your pillow and when you wake up in the morning, it's all done."

Paddy couldn't help but smile. "You do know that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit don't you?"

"And you should know if you ask a silly question..."

"Yeah, alright. It's very nice though, I love seahorses. Did you know, some species mate for life, how lovely is that?"

"Do they, I had no idea" Aaron said turning round to pour boiling water into two mugs. He wasn't going to say anything about Paddy's mysterious call out last night but he couldn't help himself.

"So, did you sort out Adam's emergency then?" he asked.

"What, oh yeah, course I did, Supervet to the rescue as per usual" Paddy said.

"Really, only just before me and Flynn got in last night, we were talking to Adam at the bus stop. He was getting on the bus to go and see Maddie."

Paddy looked at him. "See what happens when you tell lies, you get caught out" he said looking a bit embarrassed. "I knew I should have said it was Moira, you'd be none the wiser."

"You didn't have to go out at all you know" Aaron said.

"I know but you're glad I did aren't you?" he said smiling at him. Aaron just smiled back and took the two mugs of tea upstairs.

On the Sunday afternoon, Flynn was out with Nick so Aaron decided to visit Jackson's grave, take the opportunity to check that the grave was tidy. "So, there you go" he said. "I just can't get the thought out of my head. I've tried ignoring it but I can't. Some things never change, do they? Once I get an idea in there, it won't go away. What would you do with me eh? Actually, don't answer that, we are in a churchyard after all." Aaron stood up, holding the small clump of weeds that he'd pulled up in his left hand and touched the top of the headstone with his right. "Well that's you sorted mate" he said as he put the weeds into one of the bins he passed and walked out onto the main street where he saw Adam.

"Alright lad, I was just coming to look for you. Fancy a pint?" Adam asked.

"Yeah, alright but why not come back to mine. There's no point paying for beer when we've got a fridge full is there?" Aaron replied.

"Lead the way then" Adam said. They had a couple of cans of lager, played a few games on the x box but Adam had a feeling that there was something else going on.

"Right, that's three times in a row I've beaten you now" he said putting the controller on the table "so either you're having a really bad day or you've got something else on your mind so which is it?"

Aaron smiled at him. "Even if I was having the worst day ever, you still wouldn't beat me three times in a row like that."

"That's what I thought, so come on, let's hear it" Adam said. Aaron put his own controller down and leant back on the sofa looking at Adam sat next to him. He chewed on his bottom lip before speaking. "If I tell you, you have to promise me you won't breathe a word to anyone."

Adam looked serious. "Course, goes without saying."

"I mean it Adam, this can't go any further." Adam began to grow concerned. "Alright mate, I promise. Look, you're scaring me now. Whatever it is, just tell me."

Aaron looked at him with as serious a look on his face as Adam had seen on his best friend in a long time. In a quiet voice he said "I want to ask Flynn to marry me."

"You what?" Adam said spitting out his mouthful of lager, shock registering on his face.

"I said, I want to ask Flynn to marry me" Aaron repeated.

"O- kay" Adam said slowly.

"Look, you know I told you we wanted to live together as soon as we could afford it." Adam nodded. "Well, I've been thinking about it a lot and it's not enough for me. I want more."

"Wow, well I wasn't expecting that" Adam said wiping his mouth "I mean, I know how you feel about him, what he means to you but marriage…"his words died away.

"I know, mad isn't it, but I've never been more certain of anything in my life. I never used to see the point in getting married. I used to think if you want to be with someone, then be with them, you don't need a piece of paper to prove anything but then I began to think about me and Flynn and I realised that I don't need that piece of paper but I want it. He's the one for me, he always will be and I want everyone to know it." Adam could feel himself welling up. The sincerity in his friend's voice, the calmness with which he was speaking, the look in his eyes when he spoke about Flynn told him just how serious he was about this. He felt so proud of him, so proud of how he'd grown up and matured that he didn't think he could speak at the moment without crying. He looked down and took a sip of his lager, giving him time to compose himself.

"Isn't this the part where you tell me it's the stupidest idea I've ever had, that we're far too young to get married, that it'll never last because in a few years we'll be different people, that I don't know what I want from life yet, that we should just live together first, have some fun and see how things go?" Aaron asked him. Adam smiled and shook his head. "No mate because there'd be no point. I'd only be repeating things you've obviously thought of already."

Aaron nodded his head. "I have, I've thought of all those things and more but I keep coming back to the same thing. Me and Flynn, it just feels right, I can't explain it any other way. So, what do you think, honestly?"

Adam took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. "Honestly, I can't see me getting married or even thinking about it for a very long time but then again, I haven't met my Flynn yet have I?" Aaron looked at Adam with a strange expression on his face and Adam burst out laughing. "That sounded better in my head" he said. "What I'm trying to say is if I was ever lucky enough to have the sort of relationship with someone that you and Flynn have got, then I'd probably be thinking the same as you."

"Really?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah really. You two are made for each other."

Aaron smiled at him. "Cheers mate, that means a lot."

"Expensive things though, weddings" Adam said. Aaron pulled a face. "They don't have to be, it's not about spending lots of money is it? Besides, I'm not fussed about a big wedding."

"No but Flynn might be. It'll be his big day too you know. He might want the full works."

Yeah well, we'll talk about it if he says yes."

"If he says yes, are you serious? Come on, there's no way he's not going to say yes. He's been in love with you from the moment he set eyes on you that night me and you were in Bar West."

"Maybe but that doesn't mean he'll want to get married does it? He might not see the point."

"No, no way, not Flynn. He'll say yes, I know he will. In fact, I'm so sure he'll say yes that if he doesn't, which he won't by the way, I'll run down the street from your place to the pub with no clothes on."

"You'll do what?" Aaron said in amazement.

"You heard me, that's how sure I am that he's going to say yes."

Aaron started to laugh. "It'd almost be worth him saying no just to see that. You'd have to hope it wasn't a cold day though."

"Hey, cold day or not, I've got nothing to be ashamed of alright but he's not going to say no is he so I don't have to worry about it" Adam said. Aaron shook his head, trying to get the image of a naked Adam running down the road out of his mind.

"So, when are you going to ask him?" Adam asked.

"I have no idea. When the time's right I suppose, whenever that may be."

"Giving yourself time to change your mind are you?" Adam said nudging Aaron.

Aaron shook his head. "That's not going to happen. I really want this Adam."

"I know you do, I can tell." He held his can out to Aaron. "Well, here's to you and Flynn pal and to getting the answer you want whenever you get around to asking him."

Aaron banged his own can against Adam's. "Cheers. Right, time for a rematch, I think. I'll never hear the end of it if you leave here tonight having beaten me."


	48. Chapter 48

In a pub in Hotten, Flynn took the last gulp of lager from his bottle and placed it back down on the table. He hadn't been out with Nick for ages and it was good to be out with his mate again. They'd known each other since Flynn had first moved to the area and had found himself the new kid in school. Nick had taken him under his wing, they'd hit it off straight away and their friendship had grown from there. They'd been through a lot together since then, from the death of Nick's dad to his own coming out. He'd been dreading telling him but when he'd finally plucked up the courage, Nick had just smiled at him and said tell me something I don't already know and that had been that. It was Nick who'd picked up the pieces when first Matt then Aaron had broken his heart and as best friends go, he couldn't have asked for a better one.

"So, how is old blue eyes these days, I haven't seen him for a while" Nick's voice interrupted his thoughts. Flynn smiled the smile he had no control over whenever someone asked after Aaron. "He's fine, working hard as usual. You'll have to come over to mine one night when he's there."

"Yeah I will. So how long have you two been together now?" Nick asked.

"Almost two years."

"Really, I knew it was a long time but I didn't think it was that long. We'll be hearing wedding bells soon then" he said teasingly. Flynn shook his head. "No you won't" he said adamantly.

"Well that was said with purpose. Are you sure about that?"

"Absolutely certain, that's never going to happen" Flynn said.

"Why, marriage too old fashioned for you?"

Flynn smiled. "I'd marry Aaron in a field tomorrow with a couple of sheep for witnesses if I could but I don't think marriage is for him. I mean, he didn't marry Jackson did he even after everything they went through."

"True but commitment obviously doesn't scare him."

"I know, he just shows it in his own way. No fuss, nothing legally binding, just a promise that he makes and stands by. He asked me to live with him, that's as close as I'm going to get to being married."

"And how do you feel about that?"

"I'd like more but if living with him is all that's on offer, then I'll happily take it."

Nick nodded and smiled at him. "Ready for another one?" he asked.

"Yeah go on then" Flynn replied. Nick got up leaving Flynn to his thoughts. Flynn sighed. Most of the time, he couldn't be happier with his life. Aaron had shown his commitment to him not just by wanting them to live together but with his tattoo as well. It was just every once in a while, he would think about being married to Aaron and how it would be the icing on the cake for him to have Aaron as his husband but if it wasn't to be, then it wasn't to be. His thoughts were interrupted by his phone vibrating in his pocket. He took it out and read the message. It said "Missing you, A xx"

He quickly typed his reply "As if, you've got Adam for company xx" and put his phone on the table. Within seconds, it went again. He looked at the new message and smiled. It said "Yeah I know but he's not you xx" The message couldn't have arrived at a better time. Aaron loved him and wanted to be with him as much as he loved and wanted to be with Aaron so who needed marriage?

The next few months were busy ones. Aaron and Flynn celebrated their second anniversary by going back to the same hotel they'd gone to the year before, Flynn's Mum and Dad had a party to celebrate their twenty fifth wedding anniversary, the garage was busy which meant plenty of overtime which was handy and Flynn only had a month or so to go before he finished college. Flynn had been supposed to meet Aaron that evening having not seen him for a few days so he'd been surprised to get a call from him at lunchtime saying that they could meet that afternoon instead as Cain was letting him knock off early because someone was coming to see him. As Flynn parked his car in the usual place, Aaron was on his way up the hill. They greeted each other with a kiss before going in to Smithy Cottage. While Aaron took a shower, Flynn lounged on the bed flicking through a magazine. He looked up when he heard Aaron come back into the bedroom. He could tell instantly that something was wrong and this wasn't down to his intuition this time, a blind man could have seen that all wasn't well.

"What's up?" he asked swinging his legs off the bed so he was sitting up. Aaron sat on the bed next to him. "Aaron" Flynn said again "What is it?"

Aaron turned to look at him. "I, erm, in the shower, I think, well, I'm pretty sure…"

"Hey" Flynn said gently "Take your time."

Aaron took a deep breath. "I found a lump while I was in the shower." Time stood still briefly while Flynn digested what Aaron had said to him. "A lump, where?" he finally managed to utter. Aaron just looked at him. "Oh, I see" Flynn said "are you sure?"

"Well I'm not likely to make it up am I?"

"No, course not. It's just, well we only slept together a few days ago and I definitely didn't notice anything out of the ordinary."

"Yeah well there's definitely something there now" Aaron said.

"You should phone the doctors then, they'll get you in today when you explain what the problem is" Flynn said "and I'll come with you so you won't be on your own." Aaron nodded his head. Flynn placed a soft, gentle kiss on Aaron's lips before pulling him into a hug. They stayed that way for a while before Aaron got dressed and phoned the doctor's.

An hour or so later, they found themselves sitting in a packed doctor's surgery. As it was classed as an emergency appointment, Aaron didn't know who he would be seeing, it was a case of waiting for whichever doctor finished their routine appointments first. Aaron's leg was bouncing up and down constantly, the only outward sign of how anxious he was feeling. "I wish they'd hurry up, probably pick up all sorts of germs while we're sat here" he said looking around him with a look of disgust on his face. Flynn looked at him and smiled but said nothing. He didn't dare, not after what had happened in the car on the way over. He'd put some music on but Aaron had switched it off after a few seconds. Unable to stand the silence, he'd started talking hoping to keep Aaron's mind off the upcoming appointment. He should have known it was a bad idea when Aaron started sighing and biting his nails as he looked out of the window but he carried on regardless until Aaron suddenly shouted "for fucks sake Flynn, just shut up will you, you're doing my head in." Neither of them had spoken again from then until now. He felt Aaron lean against him. "I'm sorry I shouted at you in the car" he said quietly.

"Forget it" Flynn said "I should have just kept my mouth shut. I should have known you wouldn't be feeling talkative."

Aaron smiled at him. "You will come in with me won't you?" he asked.

"Yeah, course I will" Flynn replied.

"I hope I'm not seeing that young male doctor that used to be here" Aaron continued.

"Why, what's wrong with him?"

"Nothing, it's just, well, considering what needs checking, it could be embarrassing, anything could happen couldn't it? I mean it's got a mind of it's own sometimes hasn't it?"

Flynn looked at him. "Do you know, I worry about you. Only you would be concerned about something like that."

At that moment, one of the three consulting room doors opened and a tall, very good looking male doctor in his late twenties came out. "Oh no" Aaron groaned.

"Ooh hello" Flynn said smiling "he can examine me anytime."

"Right, if he calls my name out, I'm not answering" Aaron said.

"Mr Liv…." Aaron felt himself start to blush "ingston, Mr Colin Livingston please." Aaron let out a sigh of relief as an older gentleman stood up and followed the doctor into his room. A few seconds later, Aaron heard a woman's voice calling his name. A kind faced lady in her forties was looking around the waiting room. Aaron and Flynn stood up in unison and followed her into her room, taking a seat next to each other opposite her desk. She sat down and smiled at the two serious faces looking back at her. "So, which one of you is Aaron?" she asked.

"I am" Aaron said "He's my boyfriend, he can stay can't he?"

"Yes, if you want him to. So, how can I help?"

Aaron sat for a couple of seconds saying nothing. He felt Flynn take his hand and turned to look at him. Flynn nodded his head in encouragement.

"I er I found a lump earlier on today" he said.

"I see, and where did you find it?"

"In the shower" Aaron answered. Flynn and the doctor smiled.

"I meant, where on your body" the doctor said gently.

"Oh, sorry" a blushing Aaron muttered "it's on one of my balls, can I say that?"

"You can say whatever you feel comfortable with" the doctor said before sending him behind a curtained off area to get ready to be examined. She emerged a couple of minutes later, smiled at Flynn and sat back down typing notes on her computer while she waited for Aaron to join them. When he was sitting next to Flynn again, she confirmed that there was definitely something that needed investigating and told them she would arrange for a hospital appointment as soon as possible. She explained that Aaron would have to go in to have the lump removed and then it would be sent away to be analysed. She reassured him that he'd done the right thing by coming to see her so soon after finding it and told him to try not to worry. Flynn and Aaron looked at each other, like that was going to happen. In the car going home, Aaron told Flynn he wouldn't be saying anything to anyone until he knew exactly what the problem was. Flynn told him that he thought he was wrong but Aaron wouldn't listen so he dropped it. When Aaron's appointment letter arrived a couple of days later, they had the same conversation.

"You need to tell Cain, your mum and Paddy" Flynn said.

"No I don't" Aaron replied shaking his head.

"Alright, so how are you going to get the time off work? You're really busy and even if Cain did somehow agree, what are you going to tell Paddy and your mum about why you're not at work and why you might not be feeling so good?" Flynn softened his voice. "Look, I know it's not easy but you have to tell them." Aaron looked at Flynn and sighed. "I don't think I can" he said.

"Yes, you can" Flynn said "and I'll be right there with you if you need help."

That evening, Paddy, Cain and Chas were all in Paddy's kitchen having been summoned by Aaron. They all looked at him apprehensively, waiting for him to tell them why they were there. Flynn stood leaning against one of the kitchen cupboards, there for Aaron if he needed him but not wanting to interfere.

"Here" Aaron said handing Paddy the letter "I want all of you to read this. I wasn't going to say anything because I didn't want you to worry but Flynn convinced me that I should tell you." He stopped speaking until they'd all read it and Cain handed it back to him. "Take as long as you need, ok, it's fine" he said. Aaron nodded. Paddy and Chas looked at each other before looking at Aaron.

"I don't suppose you want any of us to come with you on the day" Paddy said.

"Flynn's coming with me, I'll be fine. I'm not going to be in there very long am I?"

"Oh love" Chas said walking over to give him a hug. He briefly hugged her back before extracting himself from her embrace. "So, now you know. I don't want it mentioned again until we know what's going on, ok" he said walking out of the kitchen and upstairs.

"Thank you, for getting him to tell us" Chas said to Flynn.

"No problem. I better go" he said turning to follow Aaron.

"Hey" Chas called after him "how are you doing?"

"I'm trying not to think about it" he said as he left the room.

The night before the operation, Aaron stayed at Flynn's house. When Flynn came back from the bathroom, Aaron was lying on his side with his back to where he would soon be lying doing a very good impression of someone who was fast asleep. Flynn knew that he wasn't but said nothing. He just got undressed and climbed into bed next to him. He lay in the dark on his side, his arm draped around Aaron's waist, his hand resting on Aaron's stomach. He kissed the back of Aaron's neck and shut his eyes. A few seconds later, he felt Aaron's hand take hold of his and heard him say in a quiet voice "I'm scared Flynn."

"I know you are, me too" Flynn replied as Aaron turned himself around to face him "but we don't know anything yet, it could be nothing, well, obviously it's something but I mean it might not be anything to worry about." Aaron nodded his head. "I know but what if it is something to worry about" he said snuggling in close to Flynn. "Then we'll face it together and you know what a good team me and you are. It won't stand a chance." He kissed the top of Aaron's head as Aaron tried to snuggle in even closer if that was possible and eventually they both fell asleep. The next morning, Flynn took Aaron to the hospital and stayed with him until he went to theatre. He was sitting in the waiting room when a nurse came to find him.

"Is everything ok?" he asked, worry etched all over his face.

"Aaron had a reaction to the anaesthetic. It's nothing to worry about, it's quite common but we'll be keeping an eye on him overnight. I'll come and get you when he's settled." Flynn nodded before phoning Chas to give her the news. He stayed with Aaron until the nurses kicked him out, promising him he'd be back early the next day.

After Flynn left, Aaron dropped off into a deep sleep. He was dreaming that him and Flynn were on a beach somewhere with the sun burning down on them. They were messing about in the sea, trying to push each other over, the sound of their laughter audible over the sound of the waves. He caught Flynn off guard and sent him tumbling into the water, drenching himself in the process. He offered his hand to Flynn to help him up but Flynn pulled on it and Aaron fell into the sea too. Just as they were about to kiss, he felt his eyelids start to open. He fought like mad to keep them closed, wanting to stay in this happy place that the dream had taken him to but he couldn't manage it. As he came around, he was vaguely aware of someone holding his hand, stroking it. Once his eyes were able to focus, he turned his head to see who it was. His eyes widened and his mouth fell open as he saw Jackson sitting there. He was wearing the red checked shirt that Aaron had always liked him wearing and had a big smile on his face as he looked at him and said "Hi Gorgeous." Aaron couldn't speak. "Well, this is different, you in a hospital bed and me sitting here holding your hand" Jackson said cheerfully. Eventually, Aaron managed one word. "Jackson?"

"Still as observant as ever I see, nothing gets past you does it?" Jackson said, his brown eyes twinkling. Aaron's face went through a range of emotions in the space of a few seconds, from elation to confusion to sheer panic and dread.

"What happened to me? I'm not dead am I?" he said unable to keep the fear out of his voice.

"Course you're not dead you div" Jackson said laughing.

"Well then I don't understand. Am I dreaming or are you a ghost because if you are, how come I can feel you touching me?" Aaron asked. Jackson's face became serious as he thought about what he had to say. "We get what's called a window of opportunity, a chance to come back and see someone special one last time but we only get one so I had to pick my moment carefully." Aaron hung onto Jackson's every word, still too shocked for his emotions to have properly kicked in.

"I wanted so badly to come back just after it happened, when I saw you struggling to cope, heard you crying night after night and saw how much pain you were in."

"Then why didn't you?"

"Because you had your own angel looking after you, making sure you were alright and helping you through."

"Flynn" Aaron whispered feeling a bit uncomfortable. Jackson smiled and nodded his head. "Yeah Flynn. It's ok, you don't have to feel bad, I'm glad you had him. He did a good job as well, he really looked after you."

"I know, I don't know what I'd have done without him" Aaron said taking his eyes away from Jackson's.

"I thought you were going to blow it at one point though. You kept him waiting for so long, I thought he might walk. Luckily for you he's got the patience of a saint and stayed put."

"Yeah, well I had to be sure didn't I?" Aaron said fixing his blue eyes back on Jackson's brown ones. "Not about him but I had to be sure that I wasn't betraying you and what we meant to each other. I know I had your letter telling me it was ok to move on but I still had to convince myself that I could be with someone else." Jackson nodded his head. "I know, that was the second time I was going to come back. I was going to go for the subtle approach, you know, like a billboard with just do it in flashing neon lights but I decided against it."

"Yeah well if you had have done that, I probably still wouldn't have got the message" Aaron said smiling.

"That's because it's about more than just sex for you. It has to be, I mean, I couldn't give you anything physically but you stayed with me."

"Oh Jay, that's not true" Aaron said his voice finally breaking with emotion. "You could kiss me and every time you did, it felt like the first time all over again. I could feel it in every part of my body. You could lean your head against me when I held you and I could feel your breath on my skin reminding me how lucky I was to still have you and your smile melted my heart every time I saw it. You may have thought you were giving me nothing but you gave me everything you could. I couldn't ask for more than that. What we had was about more than just sex, it always was."

"When did you get to be so mature?" Jackson asked in a hushed voice.

"Don't know" Aaron replied "every so often I open my mouth and something grown up comes out. Look, you do know that even though I'm with Flynn, I haven't forgotten you and I never will."

"I know. Me and you are like Elliot and E.T." Jackson held out his index finger and placed it where Aaron's heart would be. "I'll be right here" he said doing what he thought was a passable impression of the alien.

"That is terrible" Aaron said shaking his head.

"Yeah well it's better than your Marlon Brando and at least I got the words right" Jackson retorted. He looked over his shoulder at something Aaron couldn't see, but he knew by the pain on Jackson's face that their time together was drawing to a close.

"You have to go don't you?" Aaron said as tears began to flow down his cheeks. Jackson smiled at him. "Hey, no tears" he said wiping them away with his thumb "You've done enough of this." He took Aaron's hand in his own again. "I'm so proud of you Aaron, of the person you've become" Jackson said "that's one of the things I came back to tell you. All the things I ever wanted for you, you've got." Aaron swallowed the lump in his throat as he listened. "The second thing is about what you told me the other day, about wanting to marry Flynn. I know you don't need my approval but for what it's worth you've got it. I wanted you to find someone who loves you as much as I do and who treats you the way you deserve to be treated and Flynn ticks both those boxes. We'll always be connected you and me but you and Flynn have something special and I couldn't be happier for you." As he listened, Aaron's eyelids began to feel heavy. Earlier, when he'd been dreaming about Flynn, he'd fought to keep them shut, now he was fighting to keep them open. He wanted to say something back but he couldn't. He felt exhausted, like every ounce of energy had been drained from him. Jackson stood up and leaned over him. Aaron could smell his aftershave, feel his breath on his face and the gentle scratch of his stubble as Jackson kissed him. "Bye babe" were the last words Aaron heard before he could fight sleep no longer.

When Aaron woke up the next morning, he felt full of energy, like he'd been recharged overnight. He was still a bit sore but apart from that he felt good. While he was waiting for his breakfast, he thought about the dream he'd had about Jackson. It had to have been a dream, he'd decided it couldn't be anything else although it was pretty vivid. He thought about how amazing it had been to spend time with Jackson again, to talk to him, hear his voice, see that beautiful face and smile once more and how much what Jackson had said meant to him. Jackson was right, he didn't need his approval to do anything but knowing that he had it was a great feeling. What surprised him a bit was that his head this morning wasn't full of Jackson and memories of their time together like he thought it would be. It was Flynn he couldn't stop thinking about and all he wanted was to see him. Unknown to Aaron, Flynn was downstairs in the restaurant at that moment. He'd arrived at the hospital at seven thirty, over an hour ago now but because the nurses wouldn't let him in to see Aaron he'd gone to get something to eat. As he swallowed the last mouthful of food, he went back to the counter and ordered a bacon sandwich asking the lady to wrap it up for him to take away. When he got up to Aaron's room, Aaron was sitting up in bed swirling his spoon around a bowl of muesli. Flynn bent down to kiss him hello and as he went to move away, Aaron drew him back into another longer kiss before eventually letting him go.

"I was going to ask how you're feeling this morning but judging by that, I'm guessing you feel ok" Flynn said smiling at him.

"Yeah, I feel alright actually although I'd feel even better if I had something decent for breakfast. This looks like the stuff Paddy cleans out of the cages at the vets."

"Well I might be able to help there" Flynn said handing Aaron the wrapped bacon sandwich. Aaron grinned when he saw it. "You are brilliant" he said taking a big bite.

"So, how did you sleep? Any weird dreams or anything? I know after my op I had the most bizarre dreams. Must be the anaesthetic, it does strange things to your mind" Flynn said.

"Yeah maybe" Aaron said but he said no more. Whatever had happened the previous night, it was between him and Jackson and he was going to keep it that way. They sat chatting until the doctor came to check on Aaron. He wasn't happy about the bacon sandwich but said that it was a good sign that he managed to keep it down. After giving him a thorough examination, he said he could go home and that he'd hear from them within the next couple of weeks. The days that followed were the longest days ever. Every morning, Flynn would phone to see if Aaron had had his letter, both of them wanting it to arrive but at the same time not wanting it to arrive in case it brought bad news. One morning, Flynn and Aaron were having breakfast together when they heard the post drop onto the mat. Aaron got up and picked the letters up, flicking through the junk mail before finding a letter addressed to him with the hospital name printed on the envelope. His heart began to beat quicker as he came back in and sat down. "It's here" he said to Flynn putting the letter down on the table. Flynn put his mug down and looked at Aaron. "Aren't you going to open it?" he said. Aaron shook his head. "Can't" he muttered.

"Do you want me to do it?" Flynn asked. Aaron nodded. Flynn picked the letter up off the table and taking Aaron by the hand, walked into the other room where they could sit side by side on the sofa. With a shaking hand he tore it open. He scanned the letter until one word jumped out at him, benign. He didn't even bother to read the rest of it, he just shouted "Yes!" Aaron stared back at him. "What? What does it say exactly?" he asked. Flynn quickly read the letter before speaking. "It says it was a cyst, there's no evidence of anything abnormal. You can read it yourself later. The main thing is there's nothing wrong with you" he said. Aaron threw his arms around him and began to cry. As they held each other tightly, Aaron felt Flynn's own tears on his neck, relief like they'd never felt coursing through both of them. They stayed that way for what seemed like ages, neither wanting to let go but eventually, Aaron pulled back and read the letter for himself.

"I can't believe it" he said looking at Flynn's watery eyes.

"I know, me either but it's there in black and white. Everyone's going to be so pleased when you tell them" Flynn said as he put his arm around Aaron again and pulled him in close. Aaron rested his head on his shoulder. "You know what we should do?" he asked.

"Get hammered" Flynn said.

"Well, obviously, that goes without saying. No, I was thinking we should speak to my mum and Paddy and tell them we'd like to have our Christmas present" he said. "Fancy a couple of weeks in the sun, just the two of us?"

"Ooh, let me think about that and get back to you" Flynn replied earning himself an elbow in the ribs for his sarcasm. "Ow" he said laughing before continuing. "I've only got one more meeting with my tutor next week and then that's me done so we could go as soon as you can get the time off work. You have got a passport haven't you?" Flynn asked.

"Of course but don't even think of asking to see the photo. It's awful, I look like I should be holding a board with a number on it in front of me."

"I bet it's not that bad. Tell you what, I'll show you mine if you show me yours" Flynn said. Aaron turned to look at him. "Shame you're only talking about passport pictures" he said leaning in to kiss him, turning his body to get as close to Flynn as he could, his left hand already under Flynn's t shirt gently stroking his chest and stomach as they kissed slowly and leisurely.

"You'll be late for work" Flynn said feebly trying to do the right thing.

"Not that late if we're quick" Aaron replied moving his hand down lower and squeezing gently. Flynn groaned. "So, am I going to work or are we going back to bed?" Aaron asked.

"We're going back to bed, now" Flynn said pushing Aaron off him.


	49. Chapter 49

**I was going to change the rating on this chapter but after taking some advice (Thanks Keith!) I think I can leave the rating as it was.**

**These characters aren't mine, they belong to Emmerdale and ITV.**

That evening, Aaron and Flynn spoke to Chas and Paddy in the pub about whether it would be possible for them to have their belated Christmas present, explaining that they needed to know about the flights before they could talk to Hazel about staying at her place. Paddy and Chas smiled at them and said that they had already looked at flights guessing that, after Aaron's healthscare, they might want to get away sooner rather than later. They told them that they'd also spoken to Hazel and between the three of them they'd worked out that if they wanted to, Aaron and Flynn could go away in two weeks time. Aaron and Flynn were over the moon that they would be able to go away on holiday so quickly. They went back to Smithy Cottage with Paddy so he could book their flights for them there and then. The only concern was that they would have to fly out on a Friday. Aaron said he was sure that Cain would give him the day off and that if he didn't, he would just phone in sick so Paddy confirmed the booking and printed out the email confirmation for them. That night, Aaron and Flynn went to bed full of thoughts of sun, sea, sand and whatever else took their fancy. The next day, Aaron spoke to Hazel himself just to make sure it was ok and to give her the flight details so she would know when to meet them at the airport. Aaron couldn't remember the last time he'd heard her sound so excited, she sounded nearly as excited as him and Flynn were.

On the Tuesday before they were due to fly out, Aaron and Flynn were having lunch together in the pub. Now that Flynn had finished college, they were able to spend even more time together which made both of them really happy. In fact, Flynn was seen around the village more often now than some of it's residents were. Half way through their meal, Flynn's mobile rang. He looked at the screen and his face grew serious. "What's wrong?" Aaron asked, his own lunch instantly forgotten. "It's my tutor" Flynn said. "But you've finished college" Aaron said looking confused. "I know, something must be wrong." Flynn took a deep breath before pressing to accept the call. Aaron tried to gauge what was going on from what Flynn was saying but it was an impossible task so he sat silently waiting for the call to be over, hoping it wasn't bad news. Bad news was the last thing that either of them needed. "Ok then, yeah I will, thanks, bye" Flynn said as he ended the call. He put his phone down on the table and turned to Aaron. "Well, what is it?" Aaron asked "Is everything ok?" Flynn nodded. "You're never going to believe this. You know that place I worked at in Newcastle for those two weeks? Well, they've just been in touch with him. Apparently, they were so impressed with my work, they want me to go up for an interview tomorrow." Aaron raised his eyebrows "Tomorrow, wow, they don't give you much notice do they? Mind you, that's probably a good thing as far as you're concerned, you won't have a chance to worry about it and get yourself in a state" he said smiling at Flynn. "Hmm, suppose so" Flynn said distractedly. Aaron leaned a bit closer to him. "Why aren't you more excited about this? It's not every day a job interview drops into your lap you know?" he said concerned by Flynn's subdued response to the phone call. "I know and I am pleased about it. It's just they've got offices all over the place, some a lot nearer to here than Newcastle so I don't understand why they want me to go there for the interview."

"Didn't your tutor tell you?" Aaron asked. Flynn shook his head. "He just said they'd give me the full details when they saw me. What if that's where the job is Aaron and they offer it to me ? What do I do then?" Without hesitation, Aaron said "Well, if you want the job, then you say thank you very much, I'd love to come and work for you and then we move to Newcastle." Flynn looked at him in stunned silence for a few seconds. "What, just like that?" he asked. Aaron nodded his head, "Yeah, just like that. Wherever you go, I go, end of. Look, you don't even know for certain that the job is in Newcastle. You could be reading more into it than there is, thinking about situations that might not exist. Why don't you just go to the interview and see what they have to say. Then when you know all the facts, we can talk about what we're going to do." Flynn smiled at Aaron before saying "Sometimes, only sometimes though, you talk a lot of sense."

"Cheers" Aaron said "don't be too generous with your compliments now will you?"

"Well, I've got to keep your feet on the ground somehow. I don't want you getting all big headed on me now do I?"

"Yeah, like that's going to happen" Aaron said putting some food into his mouth which he quickly swallowed before pulling a face. "Urgh, Marlon's food's alright when it's hot but when it's cold, it's minging" he said.

"Sorry, that's my fault, do you want something else?" Flynn asked.

"Nah, don't worry about it, I've got to get back to work anyway. I suppose this means you'll be sleeping in your own bed tonight then" Aaron said.

"Yeah I better had" Flynn replied "I've got to at least try to get a decent night's sleep."

"Right, well, I'll call you later then, see how the nerves are holding up" Aaron said grabbing a kiss before he left.

The next day, Flynn drove up to Newcastle as prepared for his interview as he could be. It lasted just over two hours and when he came out, he got straight back in his car and headed back to Emmerdale, eager to tell Aaron how he'd got on. He pulled up outside the garage and got out of his car. As soon as Aaron saw him, he stopped what he was doing and came straight over. "Hey, how'd it go?" he asked. "Great" Flynn replied unable to hide his excitement "in fact, it couldn't have gone any better. Providing I get my degree, the job's mine." Aaron's face broke out into a big grin. "What, they offered it to you there and then?"

"Yeah, I was the only candidate and the job's not in Newcastle."

"That's brilliant" Aaron said throwing his arms around Flynn and hugging him. "I mean, it's brilliant that you've got the job, not that it's brilliant that the job's not in Newcastle because I told you, if it was it wouldn't be a problem."

"I know" Flynn said smiling at him.

"Anyway, I can finally relax now, I've been on edge all day wondering how you were getting on. So, come on, tell me the details."

"Well, for at least the next twelve to eighteen months, I'll be based on that new business park the other side of Hotten. I may have to relocate at some point but that's not definite. I only had to go to Newcastle today because that's where the three people who did the interview were going to be."

"Three people?" Aaron said. Flynn nodded. "It was really scary, two hours I was in there and there was this one guy who never smiled once, he just kept staring, it was really offputting."

"I bet it was" Aaron said pulling a face. "Anyway when the interview was over" Flynn continued "They asked me to wait outside the room while they had a chat, then they called me back in and offered me the job but I do have to get my degree."

"Which you will. I've got faith in you even if you've got none in yourself" Aaron said "I'm really proud of you."

"Thanks" Flynn said blushing. "So do you fancy helping me to celebrate tonight?"

"Definitely, you can tell me all about the pay and any other stuff then. Meet me in town, usual place, usual time?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah ok but don't eat anything, we'll have something while we're out."

"Right, I'll see you later then."

Flynn kissed Aaron before getting into his car and driving off to tell his family the good news. That night, they celebrated in style finally crawling into Aaron's bed at about three in the morning which was fine for Flynn, he didn't have to get up for work the next day but wasn't so great for Aaron who did. When he got to the garage the next morning, Aaron looked like death warmed up and felt even worse than he looked but he got no sympathy from Cain at all. In fact, he even sent Aaron to get the bacon sandwiches knowing that even the thought of food made him feel sick, never mind the prospect of actually eating any and he was sure when he got back that the radio was playing extra loudly and it stayed that way all day too. That night, he was knackered but it was the night before their holiday so he had to pack and then, when he and Flynn did get to bed, they were both too excited to sleep. Needless to say, when the taxi arrived the next morning. it was a very tired Aaron and Flynn that got in for the journey to the airport.

When they got to the check in desk, they were told that their flight was delayed by an hour although they could still check their cases in if they wanted to. Glad to be rid of them for a bit, they checked in and then went for a coffee, hoping that the caffeine would liven them both up a bit. As they were drinking it, they heard another announcement saying that the flight would be delayed for a further two hours. To say Aaron was annoyed was an understatement whereas Flynn was more philosophical, taking the view that there was no point getting annoyed over something that was out of their control. Eventually, after a delay of just over three hours, they were allowed to board their flight but it was only when the plane was in the air that Aaron finally relaxed and smiled again. They slept for most of the flight and woke up just as they landed in a very hot, sunny Portugal in the late afternoon. As they came out of the arrivals into the crowded airport, Flynn said to Aaron "How are we supposed to find Hazel among all these people?"

"We won't, she'll find us" Aaron said.

At that moment, they heard Hazel calling both their names followed by over here which wasn't particularly helpful. They could hear excuse me said very loudly a few times before they finally saw her forcing her way through the crowd like Moses parting the Red Sea. "See, told you" Aaron said grinning at Flynn as he walked over towards her. "Ooh, come here you" Hazel said hugging him tightly, smiling as Aaron put his arms around her to hug her back. "Let me look at you, it's so good to see you, in the flesh I mean " she said. "It's good to see you too" Aaron said smiling back at her. Hazel then turned her attention to Flynn who'd stayed a short distance away, not wanting to intrude. "And don't think by hovering back there that you're going to escape being embarrassed. Come on, your turn now" she said holding her arms out to hug Flynn too. "It's good to see you as well" she said to him. "Thanks Hazel you too" Flynn said quietly, not really knowing what else to say. On the journey from the airport to the complex where Hazel lived, she talked virtually non stop. Aaron and Flynn couldn't get a word in edgeways even if they wanted to but they didn't mind, they just let her babble away while they took in their surroundings. Hazel's house was towards the back of the complex and consisted of a living room and small kitchen downstairs with two bedrooms and a bathroom upstairs. One wall of Hazel's living room was patio doors leading out onto some decking with steps going down into a small enclosed garden. "Hazel, this is lovely" Flynn said as he put their cases down by the stairs. "Yeah, it's not bad I suppose" Hazel said "The beach is about ten minutes away and the bars and restaurants aren't that much further. Well within staggering distance, you two will be pleased to hear." Aaron and Flynn smiled at her. "Right, well here's the key" she said handing it to Aaron "I best be off."

"Hang on a minute, where do you think you're going?" Aaron asked.

"Back to the bar" Hazel said "you don't want me hanging around do you?"

"Not for the whole holiday no" Aaron said "but you've got to at least show us where you work, have a couple of drinks with us." Hazel didn't really want to go, she'd love to spend some time with them, especially Aaron but she didn't want to gatecrash their holiday either. "Yeah, come on Hazel, please" Flynn pleaded. Hazel's face broke into a grin. "Ok then, if you're sure."

"Great, just give us a few minutes to get changed and we'll be right with you" Aaron said.

While they were upstairs, Hazel took the opportunity to have one final check around, making sure that there weren't any photos of Jackson that she'd missed when she'd moved them all earlier that morning into her bedroom but there weren't any. Ten minutes later and the three of them were strolling down to where the bars and restaurants were. Hazel told them the names of some good pubs and recommended one restaurant in particular that she said they had to try. They chatted about how she was getting on, they told her about Flynn's job, in fact they talked about everything except the one thing that Hazel wanted to know about; was Jackson still being thought of and was his grave still being looked after. When they got to her friend's bar, Hazel introduced Aaron and Flynn to her and they stayed for a couple of drinks before Aaron decided he was hungry, Flynn readily agreeing. Hazel offered to make them something to eat but they said they wanted to treat her to dinner, as a thank you for letting them stay in her house so they went to a nice restaurant a bit further down the beach front. As soon as they got there, Aaron needed to go to the toilet so Hazel and Flynn sat down at a table and ordered some drinks. While they waited for him to return, they made small talk for a few minutes before Flynn said "He still goes to see him you know."

"You what?" Hazel said. Flynn felt a bit uncomfortable but his intuition told him to carry on so he did. "Aaron, he still goes to see Jackson."

"Does he?" Hazel asked trying not to sound too pleased.

"Course he does, you don't really think he's stopped going do you?"

Hazel smiled at him. "Honestly, I hoped he hadn't but it's over two years now. He's moved on, you and him are a couple and his life's with you. He's never said whether he still goes or not and I haven't liked to ask."

"Well, trust me, he still goes" Flynn said "He hasn't forgotten him Hazel and he never will. Nor will anyone else in the village."

"And you still don't mind, even after all this time" she said. A small smile appeared on Flynn's face. "No, I got the better end of the deal didn't I? I'm the one whose still here with him." Hazel reached out and squeezed Flynn's hand. "Thank you for telling me" she said. "You're welcome" Flynn replied "I just thought if I was in your position, I'd want to know."

"Oh I see, I've been gone two minutes and you're making a move on my boyfriend. You just can't help yourself can you? And you could at least put up a bit of resistance" Aaron said as he sat down next to Flynn. Hazel and Flynn both smiled at him. "Right, let's see what they've got then shall we?" he said picking up some menus and handing them out. They had a really nice meal before taking a slow walk back to Hazel's, their home for the next two weeks. She wanted to pick up a few more clothes to take with her so she wouldn't have to come back while Aaron and Flynn were staying there. While she was upstairs, Flynn said to Aaron "When Hazel comes back, I'm going to make myself scarce, give you two a chance to have a chat."

"Why, we've been talking all night" Aaron said.

"Yeah but not on your own. I think she'd like it to be just the two of you for a bit."

Aaron nodded is head before pulling Flynn into a hug and nuzzling his neck. They stayed that way for a few seconds before Aaron said quietly "You're a really considerate person, you know that. It's one of the reasons why I love you so much." Before Flynn had a chance to reply, Hazel came back into the room. "Well, I think I've got everything I need now" she said smiling at them both. "Right, I'm going to start unpacking" Flynn said extracting himself from Aaron's hug. "What now?" Hazel asked. "Yeah, just a few bits that we'll need first thing. Then, if you don't mind, I'm going to go to bed, it's been a long day." He turned to Aaron. "I'll see you later" he said kissing him briefly before giving Hazel a final hug and thanking her again for letting them stay. Aaron and Hazel stayed up talking for about another hour or so before Hazel decided it was time for her to leave. Aaron insisted on her taking a taxi which she reluctantly agreed to. As she was getting in to the taxi, she told him to make sure that him and Flynn enjoyed their holiday and made him promise that they would come and see her before they went home, which Aaron readily agreed to. After she'd left, Aaron went into the kitchen to get himself a drink, putting some ice cubes into the glass to keep the liquid cold for as long as possible. He had a couple of mouthfuls before bringing the glass upstairs with him. Smiling, he opened the bedroom door but the smile disappeared instantly as he was greeted by the sight of a sleeping Flynn. The thin quilt was pulled up to just below his hips, showing that he was naked underneath it. Aaron sighed loudly as he put the glass on the bedside table and sat on the bed. He shook his head unable to believe that Flynn wasn't awake waiting for him. Yes, it had been a long day but Flynn wasn't exactly ancient, it shouldn't have tired him out that much that he should be asleep already. He cast longing looks over Flynn's prone body and toyed with the idea of waking him up but he looked so peaceful lying there that he didn't have the heart to disturb him. Instead, he went to the bathroom, got undressed and climbed into bed. He felt a gentle breeze blow through the window that Flynn must have opened earlier and sighed again.

"Sighing already and I haven't gone anywhere near you yet" he heard Flynn say.

"I thought you were asleep" Aaron said, turning his head to look at Flynn, unable to stop himself from smiling.

"Well, you thought wrong then didn't you?" Flynn replied, rolling onto his side to kiss Aaron. The kiss was slow and long and as hot as the Portuguese night; Flynn's hand running lightly up and down Aaron's side before coming to rest just by his hip where his thumb carried on gently stroking Aaron's warm skin. Aaron's arm was around Flynn, his hand on the back of his neck ensuring that Flynn couldn't break the kiss until he was ready to let him break it. Eventually, their lips separated, sleep the last thing on either of their minds. "So, if you weren't sleeping, what were you doing?" Aaron asked. "Thinking about you, what we could do when you finally got up here" Flynn replied, his fingers tracing over Aaron's tattoo, like Aaron had done to him many times before. His eyes moved away from Aaron's briefly and he noticed the glass on the bedside table with the melting ice cubes in it. An idea began to form in his mind but before he had a chance to think about it too much, he was distracted by Aaron's mouth capturing his in another hot, steamy kiss. As they kissed, Aaron moved his body so that as much of it as possible was pressed against Flynn's. Two kisses, that was all that had happened so far yet both of them were as turned on as they could ever remember being. Each held the other tightly, their tongues now two weapons battling for dominance. Without warning Flynn suddenly wriggled out of Aaron's hold, eliciting a groan of disappointment from Aaron, and whilst lying across him reached out and fished an ice cube out of the glass. Aaron, who hadn't taken his eyes off him said "What are you going to do with that?"

"Close your eyes and you'll find out" Flynn said with a glint in his eye. Aaron did as he was told, anticipation coursing through him. With the ice cube pushed to the side of his mouth, Flynn slid down the bed before taking Aaron into his mouth inch by inch. Aaron couldn't stop himself from crying out, the heat of Flynn's mouth and the coldness of the ice cube assaulting his senses at the same time was almost too much to bear. His body twitched and moved involuntarily. Flynn had to place one of his arms across Aaron's hips to keep him still as he moved his mouth up and down, slowly at first, then quicker, then slowly again. Aaron felt like a fuse had blown in his head. He couldn't think, he couldn't speak and with Flynn holding him down like he was, he couldn't move either. All he could do was lie there, occasionally letting out a moan or a gasp as Flynn took him closer and closer to ecstasy. It was messy and noisy and one of the best things Aaron had ever experienced. His hands alternated between twisting the sheet and raking through Flynn's hair as he felt the familiar churning deep inside him that told him his orgasm was approaching. Flynn knew it too, nothing about Aaron's body was unfamiliar to him now so, with his arm still pinning Aaron to the bed, he found the rhythm and pace that he knew Aaron liked and didn't stop until Aaron was a trembling, quivering wreck beneath him. Aaron's breathing was fast and shallow as Flynn finally took his arm away and crawled up to lie next to him. He'd been expecting Aaron to lie quietly for a while recovering, so he was taken completely by surprise when Aaron kissed him roughly, forcing his tongue into Flynn's mouth as his hands touched Flynn's body. Flynn returned the kiss with interest but was so caught up in it that he didn't realise that Aaron's hand had moved away from his back where it had been resting and had taken hold of his semi erect penis. He felt Aaron squeeze it gently before starting to stroke it. As Aaron moved his hand slowly up and down, Flynn had to break the kiss, unable to continue as his body responded to what Aaron was doing to him. He buried his face in Aaron's neck, his groans spurring Aaron on. Aaron squeezed harder and moved his hand up and down quicker, taking only a couple of minutes to bring Flynn to his own orgasm. As their hot sweaty bodies lay entwined, they both knew that what had happened was just the start. For the next couple of hours, they experimented and made love to each other until sometime in the early hours, exhausted, they fell asleep.

The next morning, as sunlight streamed into the room, Aaron was the first to wake up. His body felt tired but he didn't care, last night had been incredible. He turned onto his side to look at Flynn, wondering how he would feel when he woke up. He didn't have long to wait to find out. Flynn's eyelids opened, his pupils shrinking as the bright sunlight hit him. His body ached but it was a small price to pay for the pleasures of the previous night. "Morning" he said smiling at Aaron. Aaron's response was a smile followed by a kiss. "Are you alright?" Flynn asked him.

"A bit achy but I'm fine, you?"

"The same" Flynn replied, putting out an arm so that Aaron could cuddle into him. Aaron didn't need asking twice. He snuggled up against him and they lay in a contented silence as a cool breeze blew through the window. "Who'd have thought that lurking inside your head was a mind that could come up with some of the stuff we did last night" Aaron said moving his head back so he could look at Flynn. "What is it they say about the quiet ones?" Flynn blushed as he said "I know, I don't know what came over me." Aaron opened his mouth and then closed it again, resisting the urge to state the obvious. Instead, he said "Yeah well, whatever it was, I liked it a lot" before kissing Flynn again. They lay there for a few minutes longer, too comfortable to move. Eventually Flynn said "So, what do you want to do today?" Aaron thought for a few seconds before saying "Shower, breakfast, beach."

"That's just what I was thinking" Flynn said.

"Right, I'll shower first, then you can have your shower while I sort us out some breakfast. Hazel's bound to have left some food in the cupboards" Aaron said as he got out of bed. He got half way across the room before he stopped, turned and came back. He climbed onto the bed and kissed Flynn for a third time, a longer, tender kiss this time. They smiled at each other before Aaron went off to have his shower. No words passed between them because they weren't necessary. What they saw in each other's eyes when they looked at each other said everything they needed to know about their feelings. If last night was anything to go by, this holiday was going to be something special.


	50. Chapter 50

Aaron and Flynn's holiday fell into a nice pattern of lazy lie ins, trips to the beach , eating out and visiting the various bars and clubs in the evenings. They tried some different restaurants in those first couple of days but took a shine to the one that Hazel recommended. The food was good, not that expensive and the staff were all really friendly. The same waiter served them every time they went in. He was about their age and the three of them hit it off straight away. One day when they were talking, Aaron and Flynn asked him if he could recommend some places for them to visit so he told them about a water park that wasn't that far away and he also said that they should visit Lisbon. With a knowing smile, he also recommended a bar to them saying that he goes there with his boyfriend so he could promise them it was ok and they would have a good time. Aaron and Flynn decided to give it a try that night. The drinks were a bit more expensive than in other places they'd visited but they didn't mind paying the extra. They drank and danced and had a great time before crawling home sometime in the early hours. As they'd enjoyed the club so much they decided to follow the waiter's other recommendations too. They visited the water park where they behaved like little kids for the whole day, having a go on all the slides and riding the rapids in big inflatable tyres. They also took a day trip to Lisbon. The city was beautiful with it's suspension bridge over the bay although Flynn started to panic when their coach got stuck in a traffic jam half way across it. He didn't like the fact that they were so high up and all he could see around him was water but a few soothing words from Aaron and the feel of Aaron's hand in his soon calmed him down again. They did the usual tourist things, took photos of each other and got people to take a few of them together, had something to eat and did a lot of walking. It was an enjoyable but very long day so it didn't surprise Aaron that, as the coach wound it's way along the roads back to where they were staying, Flynn fell asleep with his head on his shoulder. Aaron rested his head against Flynn's and thought. The longer their holiday went on, the more his belief that him and Flynn belonged together permanently was reinforced. Their relationship felt indestructable, their commitment to each other beyond question, their love for each other absolute and unconditional. He'd told Adam that when the time was right, he'd ask Flynn to marry him, well now the time felt right. He just had to pluck up the courage, look into his eyes and say the words. How hard could it be? Judging by how nervous he felt right now just thinking about it, he reckoned somewhere between really hard and virtually impossible.

The rest of the holiday flew by and before Aaron and Flynn knew it, they only had a few days left. After spending yet another day at the beach, they went home, got changed and went out for something to eat. When they had finished their meal, they decided to see how many bars they could visit in one night. They made their way down to where all the bars were, calling in at the first one they came to and going on from there. The ninth bar they visited was an Irish bar called Flanagan's which was run by a Welsh guy named Terry and his wife. Aaron and Flynn instantly loved the easy going atmosphere of the place and the mainly English crowd so they decided to go no further that night. God only knew what time it was when they got home but it was starting to get light as they fell into bed. When they woke up later that day, neither wanted to move, both convinced it would be too painful. Flynn took the plunge first and sat up, waiting for the room to spin or for tiny little hammers to start banging in his head but he felt fine. Aaron refused to believe him until he sat up and felt absolutely fine too. The only thing they were both suffering from was a raging thirst. They decided to stay around Hazel's place that day anyway just in case their bodies were playing tricks on them and their hangovers would kick in later. It had a nice secluded garden where they could sunbathe, they had a fridge full of beer and other cold drinks so they had everything they needed.

They lazed around on towels on the grass topping up their tans and listening to music. When they were hungry, Flynn made them something to eat and they ate it sitting on the decking. "Do you want another drink while I'm up" Aaron asked as he started to clear the table. "Yeah, I'll have a bottle of water please" Flynn said. Aaron snorted as he put the plates in the sink. "Water? You winding me up? Have a proper drink." Flynn grinned as he stood up to go and lie in the sun again. "Go on then, I'll have a beer" he shouted. Aaron took two bottles out of the fridge and opened them, taking them outside. He handed Flynn one of the bottles before sitting down next to him on the grass. "You're a bad influence on me Livesy" Flynn said taking a couple of mouthfuls before putting the bottle down next to him. "I was trying to be a good boy." Aaron nearly choked on his own beer. "You, a good boy? After your antics that first night, you've lost all hope of ever being that Mr Ice Cube in the Gob." Flynn laughed. "You're never going to let me forget that are you?" he said laying down on his front, resting his head on his folded arms and looking at Aaron. "Nope, never, that was way too good to forget" Aaron said with a smile "as I proved to you later that same night." Flynn smiled at him. "Yeah you did didn't you? Anyway, can we change the subject now please, it's hot enough out here as it is without you making it even hotter by talking about that night" he said shutting his eyes.

Aaron took the bottle of sunscreen and applied it liberally over his body before lying down next to Flynn. He closed his eyes and relaxed, enjoying the feeling of the hot sun beating down on him. After a little while, he turned to glance at Flynn. Well it was supposed to be a glance but he ended up staring at him, admiring the way his shorts were pulled down low on his hips and high up his legs exposing as much of him as was decently possible to the sun. He ran his tongue over his dry lips just as Flynn opened his eyes. "Have you been watching me again? They've got names for people like you, you know." Aaron smiled at him. "Well you shouldn't be so good to look at then should you?" he said leaning forward to kiss him. As their lips parted, Flynn studied him for a few seconds. He thought that with his blue eyes sparkling and his tanned skin all shiny from the sunscreen that Aaron was pretty good to look at too. "Your back's getting a bit red, I'll put some cream on it for you if you like" Aaron said reaching for the bottle. "Cheers, that'd be great" Flynn said, surprised when he felt Aaron straddle him. "Do you have to sit on me in order to do it?" he asked. "If you don't know the answer to that by now, you never will" Aaron said laughing as Flynn flicked his arm behind him and gently slapped his leg. Aaron started at the back of Flynn's neck before working his way across his shoulders then down his back, stopping at the top of his shorts. Aaron's fingers felt really good as they massaged the cream into his skin. Flynn sighed, trying to ignore the fact that it was becoming just a bit uncomfortable to be lying on his front. It was almost a shame when Aaron stopped. "There you go, all done" Aaron said as he slid off Flynn and lay back down next to him again. As their eyes met, all done was about as far removed from what Aaron was thinking as it could possibly be. Just beginning was far more like it as he leant towards Flynn and leisurely kissed him again.

Flynn couldn't lie on his stomach any longer so he turned onto his side happily returning Aaron's kiss. Aaron pulled Flynn close, their hands sliding easily over the other one's body thanks to the sunscreen. They both knew they should stop before things went too far but neither really wanted to. Aaron pushed against Flynn and rolled on top of him, kissing him harder, both of them growing harder by the second. "We shouldn't do this here" Flynn murmured against Aaron's mouth, making no effort whatsoever to stop him. "I know" Aaron replied grinding his hips against Flynn's, enjoying the feeling of Flynn's hands travelling down his back and coming to rest on his arse. Flynn squeezed both of his cheeks causing Aaron to groan as the sun blazed down on both of them. Aaron took his mouth away from Flynn's and kissed his jaw, his neck before beginning to kiss his way down his body, stopping when he reached Flynn's hips. He rubbed his hand slowly up and down the bulge in the front of Flynn's shorts, hearing him moan as he hooked his fingers inside the waistband and looked at Flynn, raising an eyebrow questioningly. Flynn's answer was equally non verbal, just a small nod of his head telling Aaron to carry on. Aaron smiled before carefully removing Flynn's only item of clothing, the sight of his naked boyfriend exciting him even more. He lay back on top of Flynn again, crashing their mouths together, allowing Flynn to remove his own shorts as their undisguised lust took over. Neither of them had ever done anything like this before and probably wouldn't ever again but at that moment, they were just lost in how good it felt to be doing what they were doing to each other.

Once it was over, they lay in each other's arms, one of the towels thrown strategically over them. It made them both smile that when they were going at it hammer and tongs a few minutes ago, neither cared about being naked in the open air but now, when they were doing nothing except cuddling, they felt the need to cover up. Flynn kissed Aaron softly. "That felt amazing" he said watching Aaron blush at the compliment "and this holiday has just been the best thing ever." Aaron smiled at him. "I know, it's just a shame it's nearly over." Flynn nodded his head. "True but this time going back to reality won't be so bad."

"Why's that then?" Aaron asked.

"Because, this time when we get back, we can actually start doing something about living together. We know what I'll be earning providing I get my degree so we can start having a look around at what we can afford. Us living together isn't something that will happen at some point in the future anymore, it's something that's going to happen very soon."

Aaron grinned at him. "Suddenly going back to England doesn't seem so bad after all" he said.

"See, every cloud" Flynn replied, his grin matching Aaron's.

The next day was their last full day before going home. They spent some of it at the beach and some of it tidying Hazel's house up. They did some packing and then went out for something to eat. They went to the restaurant and had their favourite meal, making sure they thanked the waiter before they left for his help in making their holiday so enjoyable. On the way back to Hazel's, Aaron and Flynn strolled slowly hand in hand in the evening sun, neither in the mood to rush. As they walked past one of the entrances to the beach, Flynn pulled Aaron towards the steps leading down onto the sand.

"What are you doing?" Aaron asked.

"Going for one last paddle. We're heading this way anyway so what difference does it make if we walk on the beach or up here? Come on" Flynn said letting go of Aaron's hand and skipping down the steps. Aaron shook his head but followed him anyway. They both took off their footwear and carrying them in their hand, walked a little way into the sea before walking in the direction of Hazel's house. Aaron had to admit the water did feel good and although there were a few people still on the beach, they had it virtually to themselves. As they walked along, they messed around, trying to trip each other up and kicking water at each other until they were both quite wet. They came across an outcrop of rocks and decided to sit down and enjoy the peace and quiet of the beach for one last time. They sat side by side leaning against the largest of the rocks with their legs stretched out in front of them. In between kisses, they chatted about what sort of place they'd like to live in when they got back home, how good it would be to finally live together and what a great holiday they'd had before falling into a comfortable silence, the sound of the waves the only sound that either could hear. Flynn looked at Aaron and caught Aaron looking at him in that way that he did sometimes. It was the look that whenever he saw it made his stomach flip and his heart beat quicker, just like it was doing now. Aaron smiled shyly at him and looked away. He knew that there would never be a better time than now to say what he had to say. His heart was thumping, his mouth was dry and his stomach was churning but this was the moment he'd been waiting for. "You ok?" Flynn asked quietly. Aaron nodded before fixing his eyes back on Flynn again. "I er I've got something to say to you, well to ask you really." He reached out and took Flynn's hand in his, taking a deep breath in and out before speaking again. "I've been thinking about something for a while now, something I didn't think I'd ever want but now I do more than anything. I love you so much and every day, I have to pinch myself because I can't believe how good my life is and it's all because of you." Flynn's heart rate quickened as he hung on to Aaron's every word, the tears forming in his eyes mirroring the ones that were appearing in Aaron's. "I don't ever want to not be with you Flynn and I know we said we'd live together but I want more than that and I'm hoping you do too. That's why I'm asking you" Aaron paused to swallow the lump in his throat before saying the four most important words he'd ever say "will you marry me?"

Flynn felt like all the air around him had disappeared. He couldn't breathe and when he moved his mouth to try to speak no sound came out. After a few seconds, he said "Did, did you just ask me to marry you? I'm not hearing things am I?" Aaron shook his head. "No, you're not hearing things" he said quietly. With watery eyes, Flynn studied Aaron's face, wanting to remember forever exactly how he looked at this moment. "Yes, yes of course I'll marry you" he said leaning forward to kiss Aaron before throwing his arms around his neck. Aaron held him tightly as they both cried their tears of happiness, both giving way to the emotion of the moment. After a few minutes, Flynn pulled back and smiled at Aaron, sniffling as he tried to compose himself. "I've heard you say that to me so many times" he said "but every time I've heard it, it's been in a dream. I never ever thought I'd hear you say it while I was awake." Aaron's watery eyes sparkled as he said "Well you have now, just don't make me say it again because I don't think I could." Flynn smiled at the person he'd loved from the moment he'd set eyes on him but who he never thought would ever love him back.

"Don't worry I won't. You'll never know how happy you make me. I've never loved anyone as much as I love you Aaron and I'll never forget this for as long as I live." He put his hand on the back of Aaron's neck and pulled him into another kiss, a longer, deeper, kiss which Aaron happily reciprocated. "I'm sorry I haven't got you a ring" Aaron said when they finally came up for air. "I was going to get one but I didn't want to guess your size because if I got it wrong and you weren't able to wear it I'd have been gutted."

"That's ok, I can choose my own sparkly ring now can't I? You do know it's supposed to cost a month's money don't you?" Flynn said teasingly.

"You better be able to find one for a couple of hundred quid then" Aaron said jokingly.

"Well, if that's the case, at least no one can accuse me of being with you for your money" Flynn said with a smile.

"Seriously though, about the rings. I thought maybe silver for the engagement and gold for the wedding rings. Maybe we could even have them engraved with the date and where it happened, what do you think?" Aaron asked shyly.

"Wow, you really have been thinking about this haven't you?" Flynn said. Aaron nodded. "Just a bit."

"I think that's a great idea. I still can't believe this is really happening though."

"Well it is, me and you are getting married."

Flynn's face broke into the biggest grin Aaron had ever seen. "We need to celebrate" he said standing up and pulling Aaron to his feet. "What do you want to do?"

"Do you really need to ask?" Aaron said with a smile on his face.

"Oh no, in the garden on a towel is one thing but here on the sand, no chance."

"Better get back home then" Aaron said.

They bought a bottle of champagne from a bar they passed on the way home, not because either of them really liked it but it seemed wrong to celebrate something so important with a few bottles of beer. They took the bottle up to bed with them where they drank the lot before spending the next couple of hours making love to each other. When they were lying cuddled up together afterwards, neither of them could sleep. "What are we going to do about our surname?" Flynn suddenly asked out of the blue. Aaron stopped stroking Flynn's back and thought for a few seconds. He hadn't really thought about the practical side of getting married. Whenever he'd thought about it, he hadn't got past asking the question. "Well, we can't be Livesy- Buchanan or Buchanan -Livesy. Could you imagine my lot if I had two surnames? I'd never live it down."

Flynn laughed. "True and to be honest, it's not for me either."

"And I can't be Aaron Buchanan because that just sounds ridiculous so it looks like you'll have to be Flynn Livesy" Aaron said with a smile.

"Oh do I?" Flynn said looking at Aaron, thinking how proud he would be to take Aaron's surname as his own, not to mention how proud he would be to have Aaron as his husband. "Flynn Livesy. Flynn Livesy. Yeah, I like it" he said kissing Aaron slowly and leisurely, opening his mouth just wide enough to allow Aaron's tongue entry when it asked.

"So do I" Aaron said "So that's decided then."

"Does anyone back home know that you were going to ask me?" Flynn said entwining his fingers in Aaron's.

"Only Adam but when I talked to him about it, I didn't know when I was going to do it."

"What did he say? Was he surprised?"

"Yes and no. I tell you what he did say though. He said that he was so sure that you'd say yes that if you didn't, he'd run down the main street of the village with no clothes on."

"Did he? Bloody hell, he was confident. Good job for him I said yes then isn't it?"

"Hmm, suppose so unless…." Aaron turned to look at Flynn with a sly grin on his face.

"No, he's your best mate, that'd be cruel."

"Yeah I know but you have to admit, it'd be really funny too."

"He'll kill you when he finds out."

"He'll have to catch me first. Come on, this is way too good an opportunity to miss."

Flynn thought about it for a few seconds. "Yeah you're right it is. So how far are you going to let him go before telling him the truth?"

"Don't know. Depends how I feel. I might let him keep his pants on if I'm feeling generous."

"Does he wear pants then?" Flynn asked.

"I don't know do I? Pants, boxers, a thong, whatever he wears, if I'm feeling generous, he can keep them on."

"He'll never forgive you for this, you do know that don't you?" Flynn said laughing.

"Yeah he will, he'll see the funny side of it, eventually and he'd definitely do the same to me if he had the opportunity."

"If you say so" Flynn said beginning to feel tired. The euphoria and the adrenaline rush of the last few hours was finally starting to wear off. The same was happening to Aaron and within a few minutes of kissing goodnight, they were both fast asleep still in each other's arms.

When they woke up the next morning, Flynn still couldn't believe that Aaron had proposed to him. It was only just beginning to sink in. "Morning" he said leaning over to give Aaron a kiss. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine, you?" Aaron said pulling him into a hug.

"Never better" Flynn said as they kissed again. There was only one way they both wanted to start their day and it wasn't with a bowl of cereal. After showering and getting dressed, they finished their packing before making their way to see Hazel. They had a couple of hours to kill before they had to be at the airport so they decided to go and tell her their good news. She was working behind the bar when they arrived and greeted them with a big smile.

"I thought I was coming up to you later to see you off" she said.

"You were but we thought we'd come and have a quick drink with you first" Aaron said. "That's ok isn't it?"

"Course it is. You go and sit down, I'll bring some drinks over." Aaron and Flynn found a table and sat down next to each other.

"So, how has your holiday been then?" Hazel asked as she handed them their drinks and sat down opposite them.

"It's been great" Flynn said smiling.

"We've had the best time" Aaron said smiling at her "in fact, we've had such a good time, we might come back for our honeymoon."

"Honeymoon? Did you say honeymoon?" Hazel asked.

Aaron nodded. "I asked Flynn to marry me and he said yes."

Hazel's shriek could be heard streets away. She got up and hugged and kissed both of them before sitting back down with tears in her eyes. "That is the best news I've heard in a long time" she said as she looked at the two of them sitting there hand in hand. She fixed her eyes on Flynn. "So come on then, how did he do it? What did he say? Please tell me he didn't just blurt it out."

"No, he didn't just blurt it out. We were at the beach and well, what he said, I'd rather keep between me and him but it was really special and something I'll never forget" Flynn said smiling at Aaron who smiled back at him.

"Oh, look at you two. I'll be in tears in a minute. See I told you didn't I, all that time ago but you wouldn't believe me" she said accusingly at Aaron.

"Yeah, alright, I know, I know" Aaron said grudgingly.

"What's this, tell me more" Flynn said intrigued.

"At the airport, when I was coming out here" Hazel said "I told him his future was with you and if I didn't get an invite to the wedding, he'd be in trouble. Then I said something about when you two were saying I do, I'd be saying I told you so. I've got a sixth sense about things like that you see."

"Really, well what's your sixth sense telling you now?" Aaron asked.

"It's telling me shut up Hazel and go and get these two something decent to celebrate with" she said with a big smile on her face.

"Not bad, maybe you do have a gift after all" Aaron said as Hazel left them alone.

"Did she really say that, all that time ago" Flynn asked.

"Yeah she did. And every so often, she'd ask me if she needed to buy a posh dress and hat yet."

"I'm so pleased you asked me" Flynn said looking at Aaron.

"Yeah, me too. It was worth all the worry just to hear you say yes."

"Like I was ever going to say anything else" Flynn said as he leant over to kiss Aaron. As they separated, he said "Well, that's the first person told. It's just everyone else now."

"Yeah, that'll be… interesting" Aaron replied choosing his words carefully.


	51. Chapter 51

**I don't own any of these characters, they all belong to Emmerdale**

When Aaron and Flynn's flight landed late on Friday evening, Flynn's dad was waiting at the airport to pick them up. After hugging both boys, they had the usual post holiday chat as they made their way back to the car. Aaron and Flynn had decided on the flight home that they would tell Flynn's parents about their engagement the next day before they went shopping in town to look for rings. They decided not to tell anyone in the village until after they had spoken to Adam. That way, no one could let it slip out and ruin what could be one of the best wind ups ever. "Well, while you two were away, we got told some exciting news" Flynn's dad said as they left the airport and headed towards home. "Harrison and Jess are going to have a baby." Flynn looked sideways at his dad from the front passenger seat. "A baby, wow. He kept that quiet" he said. "I know, we were surprised as well. Apparently, they've known for a while but she's had a lot of problems so they didn't want to say anything until they knew everything was ok. It's due in a few months." Flynn looked over his shoulder at Aaron who was sitting in the back seat. "So, looks like I'm going to be an uncle then which means you're going to be an auntie. Auntie Aaron, see how easily it rolls off the tongue." Aaron smiled sweetly at him. "If you teach that child to call me Auntie Aaron, I'll let them play with your CD's and let them put them all back in the wrong order." Flynn gasped and held his hand against his chest. "You wouldn't" he said in mock horror. "Er, yeah I would" Aaron replied. "Git" Flynn said before turning to face the front again. Flynn's dad smiled as he listened to the playful banter. The difference between the Aaron he and his wife had first met and the Aaron they knew now was vast. As they'd got to know him better, they'd grown to love him. They loved having him as part of their family and they loved how happy he made Flynn. They'd always worried about Flynn a bit more than they had about Harrison but, since he'd been with Aaron, they didn't worry so much anymore. They knew he was in safe hands. "Right then lads, are we heading straight back or do you want to stop off and get something to eat first?" Flynn's dad asked.

"Stop and get some food first please, I'm starving" Aaron said.

"Oh now there's a surprise. The bottomless pit wants feeding again" Flynn said. "You deserve to be the size of a house the amount of food you put away. I can't believe you're always hungry."

"I'm not always hungry" Aaron chastised him.

"No, only when you're awake" Flynn said. His dad smiled again. It was good to have them back.

The next morning, after a long lie in, Aaron and Flynn got up and got dressed. When Aaron came back from the bathroom, Flynn was sitting on the bed looking pensive. Aaron sat down next to him and smiled at him. "You ok?" he asked. "Yeah, just nervous" Flynn said "I haven't felt this nervous about telling them something since I told them I was gay." Aaron put his hand reassuringly on his leg. "Well, there's no way this will be like that was. For one, you're not on your own this time although I don't know how much use I'll be and two, you haven't put away half a bottle of Sambuca so hopefully, you won't throw up on your dad afterwards." Flynn smiled at him. "I don't know about that the way my stomach's churning at the moment. I don't even know why I'm nervous, it's just…" Aaron nodded his head. "I know. I'll be exactly the same when I'm the one doing the talking. Actually, thinking about it, can we swap? I'll tell your parents and you can tell Paddy and me mum and Cain of course." Flynn couldn't help but laugh. "Er, no you're alright thanks, I'll stick with telling my parents if you don't mind."

"Thought you might" Aaron said "Now come on, the sooner we tell them, the sooner we can have some breakfast and then we can go shopping. We've got some rings to buy today remember?"

"I remember" Flynn said following Aaron towards the door. Just before he opened it, Aaron turned around and kissed Flynn. "For luck" he said.

When they got downstairs, Flynn's mum and dad were in the living room having had their breakfast hours ago. "Afternoon lads" Flynn's dad said with a grin on his face. "It's not that late" Flynn said walking over to sit next to him on the sofa. Aaron followed and sat down next to Flynn. "Leave them alone" Flynn's mum said before smiling at them. "So, what would you like for your breakfast then?"

"Actually, can you wait a minute Mum, we need to talk to both of you" Flynn said. Flynn's mum and dad looked at each other before looking back at Flynn and Aaron. Flynn looked at Aaron, who smiled at him before looking back at his parents again. "While we were on holiday, Aaron and I we, well we were out one night and Aaron asked me to marry him and I said yes." The words tumbled out really quickly and, without giving his parents a chance to say anything, Flynn carried on talking. "I know you're probably shocked and I know we're both young although we're the same age now that you and mum were when you got married but I've never been more sure of anything in my life and I would never have said yes if I had any doubts about it at all."

Flynn's mum and dad said nothing. Flynn's mum smiled, his dad just moved his eyes from Flynn to Aaron who didn't know if he was supposed to say something or not so he decided he would. "And I would never have asked him if I had any either, doubts I mean" he said seriously.

Flynn's dad's face suddenly broke into a smile. "Looks like we've got two reasons to celebrate now then doesn't it? Son, you don't have to justify any decision you make to us. You're old enough to know your own mind and we trust your judgement completely. If you want to marry Aaron , then we couldn't be happier for you, for both of you."

"Really?" Flynn said.

"Really" Flynn's dad said as he pulled his son into a hug. "To tell you the truth, we're not that shocked. We've got eyes, we've seen what you two are like and you're going to be living together soon so it's not such a surprise to find out you want to get married." Flynn smiled. "No, I don't suppose it is" he said. After Aaron and Flynn had been hugged a few more times and a phone call made to Harrison to tell him the good news, they finally got to have some breakfast before they headed off. They looked in all the jeweller's shops in town before settling on identical silver bands. They told the girl behind the counter what they wanted engraved on the inside of both rings and left Flynn's mobile number so the shop could let him know when they'd be ready to be collected. With him not working, it would be easier for him to get there than it would be for Aaron. They then went back to Flynn's, put Aaron's luggage in the car and headed off to the village.

Smithy Cottage was empty as they dropped Aaron's stuff off so they decided to go to the pub to see if Paddy was in there. As they started to walk down the hill, they saw Adam come out of the pub and start walking up the hill towards them. "Still want to do this?" Flynn asked.

"Absolutely" Aaron replied.

"He's going to kill you when he finds out the truth."

"No he won't now look serious."

"Hey, the boys are back in town, the boys are back in town" Adam sung as he smiled at his two friends. "Look at the tans on you two. You both make me look like Casper the Friendly Ghost. So, did you have a good time then or what?"

"Yeah, it was alright" Aaron said. Flynn said nothing.

"Alright? You've just had two weeks in the sun with nothing to do except eat drink and drink some more and all you can say is it was alright."

Aaron and Flynn looked at each other. "Yeah, like I said, it was alright" Aaron said "just could have been better."

"Aaron, please. Not again. You said you were ok about it" Flynn said quietly. Adam began to feel uneasy. Something was obviously not right between Aaron and Flynn.

"Yeah and I am" Aaron said. "Look, why don't you go and get us a couple of drinks, I'll be down in a minute."

"Ok" Flynn said leaning in to kiss Aaron who turned his face away so that Flynn could only kiss his cheek. Adam couldn't miss the look on Flynn's face as he shook his head and without saying another word walked off.

"Right, what's going on?" Adam asked concern written all over his face. "Something really bad must have happened for you two to be behaving like this."

Aaron sighed. "When we were away, I asked Flynn to marry me and he said no."

"What? He can't have done."

"Well trust me he did."

"Oh mate, I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say."

"Not a lot you can say is there?"

"Did he tell you why he said no?"

"He said that marriage isn't for him. He's happy for us to live together but that's it. Now it's all awkward between us. I wish I hadn't said anything."

"But you're not going to split up are you? You two will be alright?" Adam asked genuinely concerned. Aaron looked at Adam's face and felt a bit guilty but he couldn't backtrack now.

"Yeah, we'll be fine. We just need a bit of time."

Adam shook his head. "I still can't get my head around it. I was sure he'd say yes, I was certain."

"I know, what was it you said? If he says no, I'll run naked…"

"Yeah alright, you don't need to remind me." Adam suddenly had a thought. "You're not actually going to hold me to that though are you? I mean I'd had a few that night hadn't I?"

"So, you still said it."

"Yeah but that was when I thought he'd say yes."

"But he didn't did he?"

"I know but…." his words trailed off.

" I never had you down as someone who'd go back on their word mate" Aaron added.

Adam looked at him and shook his head again. "Alright, fine, a bet's a bet I suppose but I'm on my way to meet Maddie now. It'll have to wait."

"Ok, how about tomorrow, 12 o'clock?"

"Do I have a choice?"

"Not really and don't make me come looking for you, alright?" Aaron said walking off.

When he entered the pub, the first people he saw were his mum and Paddy standing at the bar. They waved over and said hello. Paddy said they were getting the drinks in and would bring them over to him and Flynn in a minute. Aaron walked over to where Flynn was sitting and sat down next to him. "So, how'd it go?" Flynn asked.

"12 o'clock tomorrow at Smithy, Adam gets to do the Full Monty and maybe I'll let him keep his hat on if I'm in a good mood" Aaron said with a grin.

"So he believed you then?"

"Of course he did, I can be very convincing when I want to be. I do feel a bit guilty though, he looked genuinely upset."

"Oh dear, someone's going to be in a lot of trouble."

"I know, still it's too late now. I just better run fast when we tell him."

Flynn sat back and folded his arms. "Anyway, talking of being convincing, nice touch only letting me kiss your cheek."

"Yeah, sorry about that but I had to make him think things were awkward between us. Anyway, he's not here now is he?" Aaron said as he leant forward and kissed Flynn slowly and tenderly on the lips. "That better?" he asked with a smile.

"That's more like it, yeah" Flynn said grinning at him.

"Aah, look at them two" Paddy said. "I know, makes you sick doesn't it?" Chas replied. Paddy turned his head to look at her. "What, I'm only joking. I'm just jealous that my son's got a better love life than I've got." Paddy smiled at her before saying in a quiet voice "I think this could be it for those two."

Chas looked at him with a confused look on her face. "Sorry, you've lost me. What do you mean "it?"

"You know,"it", the one, I Aaron Livesy take you Flynn Buchanan…"

Chas burst out laughing. "Marriage? Aaron? You're joking aren't you?"

"Am I? If I'd have said to you all those years ago oh by the way, I think Aaron's gay, what would you have said?"

"Gay? Aaron? You're joking aren't you?"

"Exactly" Paddy said "Besides, would it be such a bad thing, I thought you liked Flynn."

"I do like Flynn, I think he's great and I love seeing Aaron so happy and everything but…" she turned to look at Aaron and Flynn again before turning back to Paddy. "Do you know something I don't Paddy and this is your way of warning me?" she asked, suspicion written all over her face.

"No, course I don't but I see a lot of them two together and well, let's just say, it wouldn't surprise me."

"Well it would shock the bloody life out of me" Chas said. "He's done a lot of things that have left me speechless over the years but that would top them all. No, I don't see it, not Aaron. Besides, they've only been together five minutes, he wants to live a bit before he even thinks about doing something like that." Paddy said no more about it, just paid for the drinks and carried the tray over to the table, Chas following behind him. The four of them chatted for an hour or so about the holiday and what had happened in the village while Aaron and Flynn had been away. Chas found herself watching them more closely than she would normally have done. She saw the smiles that passed between them, the little looks and she found herself feeling a bit anxious. She didn't want to admit it but Paddy's words bothered her. They bothered her a lot.

The next morning dawned warm and sunny. Aaron and Flynn lazed around Smithy Cottage until it was 12 o'clock. They went outside and looked up and down the road to see if there was any sign of Adam but there wasn't. It got to quarter past twelve and Aaron was just about to phone him to see where he was when he came walking towards them.

"Thought I was going to have to come and get you" Aaron said grinning.

"Yeah well I'm here now aren't I?"

"And looking so happy too. I hope you've put your best underwear on seeing as anyone in the village will be able to see it shortly."

Adam pulled a face as Flynn started to laugh. "And I don't know what you're laughing at" Adam said looking at him "If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't even be having to do this."

"Hang on a minute, I didn't make the bet, you did and he's the one holding you to it, not me" Flynn said as his mobile rang. He answered it and moved a few feet away to take the call.

"Look, there's not many people around now. If you're quick, you can be there and back in no time" Aaron said like he was doing Adam a favour. Adam had a look around. The village was pretty quiet at that moment, just a couple of hikers heading off towards the river. "Ok fine, let's just get this over with" he muttered as he took off his trainers. He removed his t shirt next and threw it on to the grass next to him.

"Not bad, has someone been working out?" Aaron said.

"Piss off Aaron" Adam said "you're only doing this cos you've always wanted to see me with no clothes on."

"Yeah right, in your dreams" Aaron said laughing.

"No, in yours" Adam fired back. Just then, the door to Smithy Cottage opened and Paddy walked out. He looked at Aaron and Adam with a puzzled look on his face.

"Now there's something I wasn't expecting to see when I woke up this morning" he said smiling at them. "What's going on? Some sort of initiation ceremony so you can join his gang?"

"Very funny Paddy" Adam said sarcastically.

"He lost a bet" Aaron said as Flynn walked over and stood next to him again.

"Oh I see. He's not going to be taking anything else off is he? Do I need to warn everyone to stay inside and keep their curtains closed?"

"Stick around and find out if you want" Aaron said smirking.

"No you're alright. I'll pass thank you very much" he said as he walked off down the hill. Just then, Aaron's mobile beeped with a text message.

"Well don't let me stop you" he said to Adam "it might not stay this quiet for much longer." He read the message on his phone and felt his face going red. It said "wish it was me and you getting naked in the sun again. What an afternoon that was! F Xx" He glanced over at Flynn who raised his eyebrows and smiled at him. He smiled back.

"Well I'm glad you two are enjoying yourselves" Adam said as he took off both his socks.

"Oh stop whingeing and just get on with it" Aaron said putting his phone away.

"Next time I make a bet with you, I'm doing it with money. At least that way, it'll only be money I lose, not my dignity" Adam said as he unbuttoned his jeans and took them off.

Coming out of the B&B, David looked up the road and couldn't believe what he was seeing. As he crossed the road heading towards the coffee shop, Chas and Marlon were on their way out. "Am I seeing things or is Adam Barton taking his clothes off up there with Aaron and Flynn watching?"

"That sounds so wrong" Marlon said shaking his head.

"Well, would you look at that?" Chas said "He's not got a bad body for a young lad has he? Look at them thighs." David and Marlon just looked at her. The three of them carried on looking up the road wondering what was going to happen next. Suddenly, Moira appeared next to them. "Is that my Adam?" she asked "and why has he got hardly any clothes on?"

"That is a very good question and one to which we have no answer" Marlon said.

Looking down the hill, Adam began to panic. "Come on mate, enough's enough, me mum's down there now" he said.

"Yeah so what's the problem? She's seen it all before" Aaron said.

"Not for a good few years she hasn't, trust me" Adam said. "Come on, have a heart. You've had your fun."

Aaron looked at Flynn. "What do you reckon?"

"I reckon you better start running" Flynn said.

Adam looked from one to the other. "What do you mean, he better start running?"

"Think about it" Flynn said "When have I ever been able to say no to him? Do you honestly think I'd turn down the chance to marry him?"

"I'm sorry mate, it was too good an opportunity to miss" Aaron said backing away.

"You sod Aaron, come here" Adam said as he set off in pursuit of a fleeing Aaron. Flynn sat down on the grass and watched as Aaron tripped over making it easy for Adam to catch up with him. Adam punched him playfully a few times while telling him exactly what he thought of him before letting him get to his feet. As soon as Aaron stood up, Adam grinned at him before putting his arms around him and hugging him tightly.

"What is that all about?" David asked.

"I have no idea but if I find out, I'll let you know" Chas said as she headed off with Marlon. Adam and Aaron walked the few feet back to join Flynn.

"I can't believe you two did this to me" Adam said as he sat down on the grass.

"Well, once you'd bet him what you did, what else was he going to do? I said I thought it was cruel but he wouldn't listen to me" Flynn said.

"Yeah, it took all of about ten seconds for you to think about it and agree it was too good an opportunity to miss" Aaron said.

"Well, I don't blame you really. I'd have done the same thing if I was in your shoes."

"See" Aaron said to Flynn "told you didn't I?"

"You did" Flynn said nodding his head. "Er, don't you want to put your clothes back on now?" he asked Adam.

"Oh, yeah" he said standing up and starting to get dressed again. "So, when did you do it then?"

"On holiday, just before we came home" Aaron said.

"And did he do it properly, get down on one knee?" Adam teased.

"What do you think? Course he didn't" Flynn said "but it was still perfect" he said leaning across to kiss Aaron.

"And they're back. Now that's more like what I'm used to seeing" he said as he sat back down next to them fully clothed again. "Tell you what though, you two deserve flaming oscars for your performances." Then, in a booming American accent he said "and the award for the saddest face I've ever seen on a human being goes to Flynn Buchanan for his performance in the aftermath of the proposal." Flynn and Aaron laughed. "Yeah well, he didn't tell me he was going to do that" Flynn said "so I wasn't expecting it."

"Listen Adam, we haven't said anything to anyone else in the village yet" Aaron said "Can you keep it to yourself until we've had a chance to speak to me mum and Paddy?"

"Sure, no problem mate. When are you going to tell them?"

Aaron and Flynn looked at each other. "As soon as possible, tonight if we can" Aaron said.

"I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that little chat" Adam said grinning.

"Come on. Let's go the pub" Aaron said standing up, holding out his hand to Flynn to help him up.

"Only if you're buying" Adam said.

When the three of them walked into the pub, Marlon was behind the bar.

"Alright lads. Adam, nice to see you fully dressed again. Care to explain what that was all about?" he asked.

"I lost a bet. What can I say? Three pints please and he's paying" he said nodding towards Aaron. They waited for their drinks and took them over to a table.

"So, when's the big day then?" Adam asked.

"Adam" Aaron said "what did I just say out there?"

"What, there's hardly anyone in here."

"Yeah which means it's easier for the people who are here to hear what's being said."

"Oh right, never thought of that."

"We haven't even thought about setting a date yet" Flynn said quietly.

"We're just going to enjoy being engaged for a while first" Aaron said. They stayed for a few more drinks before Adam had to leave. Aaron and Flynn decided to go back to Smithy to watch a DVD. As they got outside the pub, Chas and Paddy were on their way in.

"Where are you two going then?" Paddy asked.

"Just back home for a bit" Aaron replied.

"A bit of what or shouldn't we ask?" Chas said grinning.

"Funny Mum. Actually, what are you doing later, both of you?"

Paddy and Chas looked at each other. "Well, nothing really. We're just going to get something to eat now and have a couple of drinks. Why?" Chas asked.

"We need to talk to you about something. Will you come back with Paddy to Smithy afterwards?"

"Yeah, yeah course I will."

"Right, see you both later" he said as he and Flynn walked off. Paddy and Chas looked at each other.

"I wonder what that's all about?" she said.

"I suppose we'll find out in a couple of hours" Paddy replied.


	52. Chapter 52

The cool interior of Smithy Cottage was a welcome relief from the heat outside. Flynn closed the door behind him and followed Aaron into the kitchen.

"So, how long do you think we've got before they get back?" he asked, putting his arms around Aaron's waist and pulling him close. "We should have about an hour or so" Aaron said with a smile on his face placing his arms around Flynn's neck. "Good, plenty of time for what I've got in mind then" Flynn said as he brushed his lips against Aaron's once, twice, before kissing him with more intensity when their lips met for a third time. Aaron eagerly kissed him back before reluctantly pulling away. "I said we **should **have about an hour or so but we've probably got fifteen, twenty minutes tops. There's no way Mum's going to be able to stay down there for long knowing we've got something to tell her. She won't be able to relax until she knows what it is so whatever you've got in mind will just have to wait until later" he said placing his hands on Flynn's chest and gently pushing him away. "Do you want a drink while we're waiting?" he asked as he opened the fridge and had a look inside. "Nah, I'm alright thanks" Flynn replied. Aaron closed the fridge door with a slam. "I don't really want one either" he said turning back to Flynn and taking his hand. "Come on, let's go watch some TV 'til they get here."

They sat on the sofa together, Flynn with his arm around Aaron as Aaron leant against him, flicking through the channels looking for something to watch. They settled on a film and waited for Chas and Paddy to come back. After about ten minutes, Flynn gently rubbed his hand up and down Aaron's arm and, smiling at him said "Hey, relax, it'll be fine." Aaron looked up into Flynn's face. "I am relaxed" he said. "No you're not. You're doing that leg bouncing thing that you always do when you're anxious and your fingers won't have any nails left on them if you carry on chewing them the way you are." Aaron smiled up at him. "Ok so maybe I am a little bit nervous" he said "but wouldn't you be?"

"No, I'd be terrified" Flynn said. Aaron laughed as they heard the sound of the front door being opened and closed and Chas's distinctive voice call out Aaron's name. Aaron looked at his watch. "Fifteen minutes exactly, see told you" he said to Flynn before calling out "We're in here." He sat up straight and said "Well, here goes."

Chas and Paddy came in and smiled at both of them. "That was quick" Aaron said. "Yeah well, when we got in there, we didn't really fancy anything on the menu so we just had a quick drink and came up here didn't we Paddy?" Chas said firing a look at him that said don't you dare contradict me. "Yeah that's right" Paddy said taking a seat in one of the chairs. Chas sat down too. "So, what did you want to talk to us about?" she asked, trying to keep the unease she was now feeling from showing in her voice. Aaron coughed and fixed his eyes on his Mum and Paddy before saying "Me and Flynn, we got engaged when we were on holiday." Chas laughed nervously. "You did what?" she asked.

"I said while we were away, me and Flynn got engaged. I asked him to marry me and he said yes."

With a grin like the Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland, Paddy launched himself out of the chair and flung his arms around Aaron hugging him tightly. "That's brilliant mate, just brilliant. I'm so happy for you, for both of you" he said finally releasing Aaron and hugging Flynn instead. "Cheers Paddy" Flynn said. "It's great news isn't it Chas?" Paddy said turning to look at Chas. Two other pairs of eyes looked at her too, waiting for her response.

"Yeah, yeah it's fantastic. Come here you" she said as Aaron stood up and went to give his Mum a hug. She held him tightly before going over to hug Flynn too. "I hope you know what you're letting yourself in for kid, marrying in to our family" she said. "Marry one of us, you might as well be married to the lot of us."

"I think I'll cope" Flynn said.

"Right, we need to celebrate" Paddy said rubbing his hands together.

"Well you better have something decent to celebrate with. I'm not celebrating with cheap lager" Chas said.

"Not even if I put a straw in it?" Paddy said teasingly.

"No, we need something proper. Why don't you two go to the pub and get us a bottle of something fizzy and I don't mean lemonade" she said, taking her purse out of her bag and handing Aaron some money. He took it without looking, said "Right, see you in a bit" and left the room with Flynn. Once out of earshot, he turned to him with a smile on his face. "Well, that was easier than I thought it would be" he said.

"See, nothing to be nervous about" Flynn said as they set off down the road.

Inside Smithy Cottage, Paddy and Chas were now sitting on the sofa. Chas hadn't said a word since Aaron and Flynn had left. Paddy glanced over at her and thought back to what Chas had said in the pub the other day when he'd jokingly said that he could see Aaron and Flynn getting married and he became concerned. "Can I ask you something?" he said turning his face to look at her.

"If you have to" she said.

"You are really pleased about them getting married aren't you? You didn't just say you were." Chas just looked at him. "Oh no, Chas" he said.

"What, I can't help it Paddy. I want to be happy for him I really do but he's so young. He hasn't lived yet. He's only had two relationships if you don't count Holly and Victoria and I'm not counting them because they were, well, I don't know what they were come to think of it but I'm not counting them. There's no way he can know at his age what he wants for the rest of his life. What if, you know, being on holiday just the two of them, spending all that time together, he just got carried away with the whole romance of it all."

"Aaron? Carried away with romance?" Paddy said incredulously.

"I know, I know, probably not eh? It's just I can't help but worry that he's making a mistake. It's all exciting at the moment but what happens after they get married and things settle down into a normal routine? How happy is he going to be when the highlight of his week is trawling around a supermarket doing the weekly shop or paying the gas bill?"

"Very happy actually as long as it's mine and Flynn's shopping or gas bill" they suddenly heard Aaron's voice say. They turned to see Aaron and Flynn standing in the doorway looking at them. "You only gave us a tenner" Aaron said throwing the note back at his Mum "and we didn't have any cash with us so we had to come back. Good job we did or I'd never have found out what you really think."

"Aaron" Chas said "I'm just concerned about you. Let me explain."

"Save it Mum, I'm not interested" he said turning and walking out.

Flynn fixed his eyes on Chas. He glared at her, shook his head and turned to follow Aaron.

"Flynn!" Chas called. He stopped and slowly turned back to face her. "Have you told your parents yet?" she asked.

"Yeah, we have" he responded, struggling to remain polite.

"And weren't they concerned like I am?"

"They said they trust my judgement. It's just a shame you don't trust Aaron's" he said before walking out.

"Brilliant, fan flaming tastic" Paddy said.

"Oh shut up Paddy, I didn't know they were standing there did I? Can't you see where I'm coming from?" Chas pleaded.

"Actually, no not this time. It's his life Chas and he's going to do what he wants whether you like it or not. It's only your opinion that he's too young to get married and hasn't lived. Hasn't lived, what does that even mean? Yeah, they're young but those two love each other, I mean, properly love each other."

"What do you mean properly love each other" Chas snapped.

"Aaron worships the ground that Flynn walks on and Flynn, well he just lives to make Aaron happy. Those two would rather lose limbs than lose each other. Marriage is a gamble no matter how old you are or how many people you've had relationships with. I mean, look at you and Carl. Being older when you got engaged didn't help you two did it? I'm going to make a brew" he said, leaving Chas to her thoughts.

Flynn saw Aaron sitting on the bench by the phone box and walked over to join him. "I'm sorry" he said sitting down next to him. "It's not your fault. I just can't believe she thinks like that. I'm young yeah but I'm not a kid. I know what I want."

"I know. She's just worried about you, she doesn't want you doing something you'll regret." Aaron turned his head and looked at Flynn with slightly watery blue eyes. "I won't ever regret marrying you, I know I won't and if she doesn't like it she can lump it."

"Just give her some time to get used to the idea, she'll come round."

"I don't care whether she does or doesn't" Aaron said flippantly, getting to his feet. Flynn was sure that Aaron didn't mean that but he didn't say it to him. Instead, he said "Are we going somewhere?"

"Yeah, back to yours. I'm not stopping here tonight." Flynn got up and placed his arm around Aaron's shoulder as they headed back to his car.

"Anyway, wasn't there something you wanted to do earlier that I said would have to wait til later?" Aaron asked smiling at Flynn.

"Oh that, I've gone off that idea now."

"Really? Let's see if you're still saying that when we're in bed later" Aaron said.

When they got to Flynn's house, Flynn got them both a drink and they sat and watched some TV in his room before getting ready for bed. "Are you sure you're ok?" Flynn asked turning on to his side to look at Aaron.

"Yeah, I'm fine, honestly."

"I know what your mum said must have hurt."

"Actually it didn't hurt, it annoyed me. We've been together for a long time now, it's not like you're somebody I've just met and I'm rushing into something. She should know me and know that I wouldn't be doing this if I thought I hadn't "lived" to use her phrase. I suppose I just wanted her to say what your parents did, that she trusts me and my judgement but she obviously doesn't. Anyway, don't worry, like I said I'm fine, I'm a big boy now" Aaron said.

"Don't need to tell me that" Flynn said raising his eyebrows suggestively, then laughing as Aaron blushed. "You're just too cute when you look like that" he said, leaning across to kiss him slowly and leisurely and slowly and leisurely was how they made love that night too before falling asleep snuggled up in each other's arms.

The following morning, Aaron had to be back at work so he and Flynn got up early and Flynn drove him back to the village. He went upstairs to get changed before heading off to the garage. Cain was already working when he got there. "Alright" he said "how was the holiday?"

"Great, really great" Aaron replied.

"So where is it then?"

"Where's what?" Aaron asked.

"Your engagement ring or don't you lot wear them."

"You've seen me Mum then" Aaron said standing next to his uncle.

"She popped in last night."

"I suppose you agree with her."

"Actually, I told her it's your life and it's up to you what you do with it. Nowt to do with her or anybody else. Now, that Corsa needs doing first. It's being collected at lunchtime." Aaron smiled gratefully at him and began work. He didn't see his mum that day and on the way home, bumped into Adam.

"Alright lad" Adam said.

"Yeah, fine" Aaron replied.

"So, how'd it go with your Mum and Paddy? Did you tell them? I hope so cos it's killing me keeping it quiet."

Aaron smiled at his mate. "You don't have to keep it quiet anymore. We told them."

"And, how'd it go?"

"Paddy was fine, she hates the idea."

"Oh mate" Adam sighed. "Got time for a pint? You can tell me all about it."

"Are you buying?" Aaron asked

"Of course."

Then I've got time" he said.

He'd just finished telling Adam what had happened when the pub door opened and Chas came in. "Right, my cue to leave" Aaron said standing up.

"Don't go on my account" she said "I only came over to say hello."

"I've got to go anyway. Flynn's picking me up in half an hour. Cheers for the pint mate" he said.

Chas sat down and looked at Adam. "I suppose he told you" she said. Adam nodded his head. "Yeah, yeah he did."

"Let me guess, you don't think he's too young or that he's making a mistake either do you?"

"No I don't. Look, when he first told me he wanted to ask Flynn to marry him, I'll admit I was shocked too. So shocked in fact that I spat my beer out all over me. I knew how he felt about him but marriage, that's serious stuff but listening to the way he spoke about Flynn and what he means to him, he really wants to do this Chas."

"And he told you all this just before they went away?"

"No, he told me ages ago, before he went into hospital anyway."

"That long ago?" Chas asked.

"Yeah, he said he was just waiting for the right time. I suppose the right time was when they were on holiday." Chas sat stunned. She hadn't thought Aaron had been thinking about getting married for as long as that. She'd thought it was a new development.

"Can I say something?" Adam asked.

"Why not, everyone else has put their two pennysworth in."

"Remember when he was with Jackson, he made some decisions that none of us really agreed with? How we thought he wouldn't be able to cope, that he was too young to make that sort of commitment. Well, he proved us all wrong didn't he because he loved Jackson and it was what he wanted to do. Well, now he loves Flynn and marrying him is what he really wants to do."

Chas found herself unable to speak mainly due to the lump in her throat that Adam's words had caused. They'd really struck a chord with her.

"Look, if it all goes wrong at some point, then he'll still have us" Adam continued. "We'll rally round him and pick up the pieces again just like we did after Jackson but I really don't think it will. Aaron and Flynn, they're good together you know, really good together."

Chas nodded her head. "Thank you" she said.

"For what?"

"For making me see what was right in front of my nose." She knew what she had to do but she wanted to think about what to say first. The last thing she wanted was to try and make things right and end up making them even worse.

The next day, Aaron was on his own at the garage when he heard a car pull up. He'd been on his own for most of the morning as Cain had disappeared somewhere. He was both relieved and pleased when he looked up to see that the car that had just arrived belonged to Flynn and not to a customer. Flynn walked towards him waving a small bag in the air with the name of the jewellers on it that they'd ordered their rings from. "Guess what I've just been to collect?" he said, beaming at him. "I know we were meeting later and I suppose I could have waited 'til then to show you but I was too excited." Aaron grinned at him. "Well, bring them inside then and we'll have a look." They went into the garage where Flynn put the bag on the counter before taking out two identical ring boxes. He opened one of the boxes and took the silver band out, angling it so that they could both see the engraving on the inside.

"What do you think?" he asked Aaron.

"Looks great. Is that my one?"

"One way to find out" Flynn said. He took the ring and placed it on Aaron's finger. It fitted perfectly.

"How does it feel?" Flynn asked.

"It feels fine" Aaron said bending his finger a couple of times. "It'll take a bit of getting used to, I've never worn a ring before" he said holding his hand up and looking at it.

"What are you going to do with it while you're working? Put it on your chain so it doesn't get damaged?"

Aaron frowned at him. "No, why would I want to do that? I want to wear it where everyone can see it, not hide it away under my clothes. The only time this ring's coming off is when it's replaced by my wedding ring." They smiled at each other unable to hide their happiness.

"So, this one must be yours then" Aaron said grabbing the box before Flynn could get to it. "I suppose I should propose properly now that I've got the ring" he said smiling at him.

"There was nothing wrong with the proposal, trust me."

"Not according to Adam. According to him, I didn't do it properly because I didn't go down on one knee."

"So, that doesn't matter."

"It matters to me. I'm only going to get married once, I want everything done properly so…" Aaron dropped down on one knee and looked up at Flynn "will you marry me?"

Flynn looked down into Aaron's face expecting to see him laughing but he looked serious, like he had the first time. He'd never expected Aaron to ask him to marry him once never mind twice yet here he was asking him again, waiting for his answer. He nodded his head. "Of course I'll marry you."

Aaron stood up and took the ring out of it's box before placing it on Flynn's finger.

"I can't believe you just did that" Flynn said shaking his head.

"Why, I'd do anything for you" Aaron said quietly as he placed his hands either side of Flynn's face and kissed him. Flynn could feel the cold metal of Aaron's engagement ring against his cheek as he put his arms around Aaron's waist and kissed him back. Outside, unseen by both of them, Chas wiped a tear away from her cheek. She'd heard most of the exchange between the two of them and she knew for definite now that her fears were unfounded. She thought she even got what Paddy had meant when he'd said that Aaron and Flynn properly loved each other. Not wanting to spoil the moment for them, she turned and managed to walk away without Aaron and Flynn even hearing her leave. Mind you, a bomb could have gone off and it still wouldn't have made them break their kiss. Eventually, the physical need to breathe forced them apart as they stood contentedly in each other's arms, foreheads touching.

"What time are you taking your lunch break?" Flynn asked.

"I don't know if I'll get one. If Cain doesn't come back, I'll have to just grab a sandwich and stay here."

Flynn nodded. "Right, well I better let you get back to work then. Don't want Cain to think I'm distracting you." They walked out onto the forecourt together and stood talking for a couple more minutes. Another car arrived, this one containing Cain.

"Busy are we?" he asked as he got out.

"For your information, this is the first time I've stopped since you left" Aaron said. "Oh and before I forget, that old guy with the silver Toyota's been back on the phone, wants you to call him back."

"What for? I only sorted his car out for him last week."

"Don't know, he wouldn't tell me. I only want to speak to the boss he said."

"Should have told him tough, Bruce Springsteen doesn't work here anymore. Right, you might as well have your lunch now" he said walking off into the garage "And don't be late back."

Aaron and Flynn decided to go back to Smithy Cottage and have some lunch there. They made some sandwiches, got a drink and were just sitting down to eat when there was a knock at the door.

"Unbelievable" Aaron said as he got up to see who it was. He was surprised to see his Mum standing there. "Can I come in?" she asked. Aaron said nothing, just stood back and motioned with his hand for her to come in.

"Hiya love" she said to Flynn.

"Alright" he said "Do you want a brew?" he offered, trying to be polite.

"No, I'm not stopping long. I just wanted a word with Aaron if that's ok."

"I'll just take this upstairs" Flynn said grabbing his plate and his drink and leaving Aaron and Chas alone.

"So are you ok?" she asked hesitantly.

"Yeah, I'm fine, you?"

"You know me. I'm always ok."

Aaron nodded his head and took a bite of his sandwich. That was when Chas noticed for the first time the silver band on his wedding finger. She could feel herself getting emotional again, Adam's words and what she'd overheard between Aaron and Flynn flying around her head and she knew if she didn't speak now, she wouldn't be able to.

"Aaron, I'm sorry you overheard me say the things I said but I'm not sorry that I said them. I'm your Mum and I was genuinely worried about you, worried for you. After everything you've been through, you can't blame me for that." Aaron put his head down briefly and shook it before looking up again. "I don't. It's just, you should know what I'm like by now. I would never have asked Flynn to marry me without really thinking about it first and if I thought I was going to miss out on anything by marrying him, do you really think I'd be doing it?"

"No, of course you wouldn't. You really do love him don't you?" she asked.

"More than anything and the best bit is, I know he feels the same way about me, faults and all. I'm not stupid Mum. I know it's a big step and I know it's not always going to be happy or easy and we'll have our problems, I'm sure we will, but I also know he's the one for me. I'm certain of it."

Chas looked at her son with a new found sense of pride. The petulant teenager who'd caused her so many problems was a distant memory, long gone and replaced by this loving, caring young man sitting opposite her now. She reached out and took his hand.

"Then, that's good enough for me."

"Really? You're not just saying that are you because if you don't mean it, I'd rather you said nothing. "

"Oh I mean it son, believe me."

"Thank you" Aaron said getting up to give his mum a hug. She hugged him tightly before letting go and shouting "Flynn, you can come and make me that brew now?"

"He's not going to hear you from there is he?" Aaron said going into the little hall where he stopped in his tracks as he found Flynn sitting on the third stair up, looking a little bit sheepish.

"How did you know?" Aaron called through to his mum as Flynn followed him back into the kitchen.

"Because no one can make it up a flight of stairs by only treading on three steps" she said laughing. Looking at Flynn she said "You should have just stood on one stair and banged your feet the right number of times as if you were going all the way up. I'd never have known then."

"I'll try to remember if there's a next time" Flynn said as he put the kettle on.

When Aaron returned to work, Cain looked at his watch. "Thought I told you not to be late" he said.

"Yeah I know I'm sorry. Mum came round and we had a bit of a chat. I lost track of time."

"Right, so is everything sorted?"

Aaron smiled. "Yeah it is."

"Good. Well, don't just stand there, the car's aren't going to fix themselves you know."


	53. Chapter 53

Over the next couple of days, news of Aaron and Flynn's engagement spread through the village with everyone they met offering them their congratulations and best wishes apart from Cain who said nothing. Aaron didn't mind, Cain wasn't really one for sentiment but he knew that his uncle was happy for him. It was hard to believe that at one point, Aaron had had more enemies than friends in Emmerdale but things had changed, he had changed and people liked the person he had become, well most people did. He found it all a bit overwhelming being the talk of the village again but at least this time, it was for a nice reason so, although he felt a bit uncomfortable, he answered any question that was asked of him with a smile on his face even if he had answered it twenty times before.

He'd been working hard all morning on a Golf that had been brought in with the age old it's making a funny noise story but so far he'd found nothing wrong with it and it was starting to get on his nerves. He looked at his watch and was glad to see it was nearly lunchtime. He was meeting Flynn for lunch and he thought an hour spent away from work with Flynn was just what he needed right now. By the time he'd washed his hands and cleaned up a bit, Flynn had arrived and was chatting to Cain. Aaron smiled at him when their eyes met and walked over to join him. With a warning from Cain about coming back late ringing in his ears, they set off for the café. As they were walking up the road, Edna was walking down it. With her strong faith and deep religious beliefs, she was the one person that Aaron thought would have a problem with their engagement. It didn't bother him what she thought, they didn't have a lot to do with her but he didn't want them to be on the receiving end of any lectures or sermons. He didn't want a row either but if she said anything to them that he didn't agree with, he would say something back.

"Could be interesting" he murmured to Flynn.

"I hear you two have got engaged" she said in her usual brusque manner.

"That's right" Aaron said.

"Well, let me add my congratulations to those you've no doubt already received."

Aaron and Flynn couldn't help the look of surprise that crossed their faces.

"Oh…right…er thanks" Aaron said.

"You seem shocked. What were you expecting me to say? I was brought up to believe that love is a gift, something to be cherished and celebrated which is what you two are doing by getting married. If you're prepared to take it as seriously as it's meant to be taken, then who am I to pass any judgement. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have things to do" she said as she hurried away.

"Well I wasn't expecting that" Aaron said as they started walking up the road again "I was expecting the It's Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve crap."

Flynn laughed. "I know, I was too. So love is something to be cherished eh?"

"According to Edna."

" People have that in their vows now don't they? They say cherish rather than obey."

"I still like obey" Aaron said.

"You would, caveman."

"I'm going to see if we can have obey when we get married. I'd love to hear you promise to obey me."

"I'll say it if you will" Flynn said knowing full well Aaron would never agree.

Aaron snorted. "On your bike. I don't obey anyone."

Flynn stopped with his hand on the door handle of the café and turned to face Aaron. He leant towards him and in a quiet voice said "That's not true though is it? You obeyed me in bed last night. You did everything I told you to do" he said smirking at him.

"No I didn't" Aaron said just as quietly "I did what I wanted to do, it just happened to be what you wanted too. Now get in there, I've only got an hour" he said gently pushing him through the door. While Flynn ordered their lunch, Aaron sat down at a table. They'd only had their food a couple of minutes when Chas breezed in and planked herself down next to Aaron.

"Why don't you join us? Oh you already have" Aaron said sarcastically. Ignoring her son's remark, she said "What are you two doing on Saturday night?"

"Dunno, probably just go into town" Aaron said "Why?"

"Well, I still feel bad about the way I reacted to your news so I thought you could let me take you both for a couple of drinks in the pub. My way of saying sorry. What do you say?"

"There's no need" Aaron said.

"No I know but I'd like to. Come on, we haven't had a drink together in ages."

Aaron looked at Flynn. "We can always go into town later" Flynn said.

"Yeah, course you can. Please" Chas pleaded.

"Ok, what time?" Aaron asked his mum.

"About 7.30."

"Alright, we'll see you there."

Chas beamed at them. "Great" she said getting up and leaving them to get on with their lunch.

Saturday arrived, hot and sunny so Aaron and Flynn decided to go out for the day. They headed off in Flynn's car with no particular destination in mind, just seeing where the roads took them. They ended up at a zoo. Aaron said he couldn't remember ever going to one which Flynn thought was really sad. He thought every child had been taken to the zoo or the seaside but obviously Aaron hadn't had the sort of childhood that he had. They spent a couple of hours walking around, had a laugh watching the sea lions perform, took a few pictures with Aaron's phone before setting off to find somewhere to get something to eat. They found a lovely little village pub on the banks of a river where they sat outside eating their food before driving back to Flynn's house. When they arrived, Flynn's parents were just on their way out. They had a very brief conversation with them before they left.

"Your parents have a better social life than we do. They're hardly ever in" Aaron remarked turning to look at Flynn who was sitting next to him. Flynn smiled. "I know but it has it's benefits. Getting this place to ourselves a lot for a start" he said placing a gentle kiss on Aaron's lips. Aaron kissed him back and held him close as Flynn started to place little kisses across Aaron's jaw and down his neck while his hand lightly moved over Aaron's chest and down over Aaron's stomach.

"We haven't got time for this" Aaron groaned as he lay with his eyes closed, running his hands up and down Flynn's back.

"So tell me to stop then" Flynn said with his mouth against the warm skin of Aaron's neck. "Any time you want" he continued as he worked his way back up to Aaron's mouth. Aaron met Flynn's mouth with his, kissing him with all the passion he was now feeling. He could never tell Flynn to stop, he didn't want him to stop and if that meant being late to meet his mum, then so be it.

Freshly showered with a towel around his waist, Flynn walked back into his bedroom and found Aaron still lying in bed. "Come on you, shift" he said, opening a drawer and taking some clothes out.

"Can't I just phone her and say we can't make it? Go for a drink another time" Aaron moaned.

"No we can't. You saw her face when she asked us, it's important to her so get a move on." He sat down on the bed and started to get dressed. Aaron pulled a face. "I wish you were more selfish sometimes" he said as he got out of bed and headed for the shower. "No you don't, you love me just the way I am." Aaron turned and smiled at him. "Yeah, I do."

About half an hour later, they were both dressed and ready to go. They eventually pulled up outside Smithy Cottage at ten to eight. When they got to the pub, they saw Chas outside.

"Sorry we're late" Flynn said apologetically "have you been here long?"

"No just got here meself" she said smiling at him. "I thought I was going to have to apologise for keeping you two waiting."

"Well, when you get to your age, I suppose it takes longer to make yourself look decent" Aaron couldn't resist saying."

"Oi, cheeky" she said slapping him on the arm. "You can buy your own drink for that." She headed towards the door with Flynn and Aaron following. As they came in, they were greeted by a wall of sound, cheering and clapping. Flynn and Aaron stopped in their tracks as Chas grinned at them. There was a banner behind the bar saying Congratulations Aaron and Flynn and a karaoke had been set up in the corner. There was a buffet laid out and what looked like most of the village looking back at them with smiles on their faces. As they looked around, they were even more surprised to see Flynn's Mum, Dad, Harrison and Jess sitting with Paddy, Adam and Maddie. They both looked back at Chas not knowing what to say. "Well you can't get engaged and not have a party can you?" she said as she hugged them both.

"But, my parents, how.." Flynn asked.

"Me and Paddy went round and spoke to them. He knew where you lived from when he dropped Aaron off when he was on crutches that time. We couldn't have a party for you two and not invite your family now could we, I mean, we'll all be related soon. Anyway, time to get this party started" she said grabbing Charity's hand. "Hang on a minute, I'm not nearly drunk enough to get up there and sing" she said as Chas started to pull her away from the bar. "Oh come on, where's your sense of fun? I've got the perfect song as well" she giggled. Charity knew it was pointless to argue so she let herself be dragged across the pub. As the opening bars of It's Raining Men began to play, Aaron and Flynn looked at each other and smiled. "Your poor parents" Aaron said "maybe we should just apologise now."

"You haven't seen my dad when he's had a few. Maybe it'll be me that's apologising" Flynn said as two pints were put down in front of them by a smiling Diane. "When you're ready for more, let me know" she said "there's plenty of money been left behind here for drinks" she said. "Cheers Diane" Aaron said looking over at his mum and Charity who were singing their hearts out. "Oh my god" he said to Flynn shaking his head.

"I've heard worse" Flynn said laughing "not much worse but I've heard worse. Are you going to give it a go this time?"

"What do you think?" Aaron pulled a face as they made their way over to Flynn's family.

As more alcohol was consumed, people became braver and there was soon no shortage of performers. By the time Paddy, Adam, Marlon and Alex went up to sing YMCA again, they had the whole pub accompanying them. Flynn's dad turned to Aaron. "Your dad's a lovely fella isn't he? A really nice guy." Aaron smiled at him. Now wasn't the time to get into the complexities of his family background so he just said "Yeah, yeah he is." Flynn squeezed his hand and when he got Aaron's attention asked him if he wanted another drink. Aaron said he'd come to the bar with him. As they stood at the bar waiting to be served, Aaron noticed Cain making his way over to them. "I wondered when he'd come over" he said to Flynn nodding his head towards Cain. Flynn smiled. "Should be good this." Cain placed his empty glass on the bar and looked at the two of them. "Still can't believe you two are going to get hitched" he said.

"Well we are" Aaron said waiting to hear what was coming next. Cain nodded his head. "Well, congratulations, I hope you have a long and happy life together." Aaron paused before saying "Is that it?"

"What do you mean is that it? What were you expecting a full blown speech?"

"No, course not but no sarcastic comments, no micky taking. I was at least expecting you to ask which one of us would be wearing the dress."

"And why would I ask a question that I already know the answer to, eh? You're a bigger girl than he is" Cain said flashing a sarcastic grin at Aaron before looking serious. "Look, I know I always have a little go but you know I've always been on your side Aaron. I've only ever wanted you to be happy. You're not a bad lad on a good day and you" he said turning his attention to Flynn "I've got a lot of time for you. I dread to think what might have happened to him if he hadn't have met you again. You're good for each other so, just this once, I'm being nice but don't either of you even think of hugging me." Temporarily lost for words, Aaron and Flynn looked at each other. Flynn was the first to recover. He held out his hand and said "Cheers Cain, that means a lot." Cain shook his hand and looked back at Aaron. Aaron cleared his throat. "So are you getting us some drinks then or what?" he asked.

Cain smiled and ordered three pints, taking his with him when they arrived.

"Well, that was unexpected" Flynn said.

"Yeah, he's full of surprises isn't he?" Aaron answered.

Flynn put his arm around Aaron and kissed him. "Must run in the family" he said laughing.

"I almost feel bad for putting his name down for the karaoke now" Aaron said sipping his pint.

"You did what?"

"I thought it'd be funny."

"Have you got a death wish or something? If I was you, I'd stay near the door, ready for a quick getaway."

About half an hour later, they heard Bob say "Well, here's something I never thought I'd be saying." Aaron and Flynn looked at each other. "The next person up to sing is Cain..." The whole pub went quiet as everyone turned to look at Cain who was standing a few feet away from them talking to Zak and Lisa. He looked deadly serious as he turned his head and stared at Aaron. Then he smiled as Bob continued "And he's going to be accompanied by one half of our happy couple. Aaron, get up here and sing with your uncle." Flynn's jaw dropped as a look of horror crossed Aaron's face. "Well, go on, get up there" Paddy said "don't want to keep Cain waiting."

"Yeah Aaron, off you go" said Adam trying hard not to laugh. "Someone film this, this is going to be priceless."

Cain walked over to the table and put his glass down.

"Thought you were being clever didn't you? You have to get up pretty early in the morning to get one over on me sunshine. If I'm going to make a fool of myself, you're going to be right there next to me."

"Cain, Aaron, are you coming up here or what?" Bob called.

Cain and Aaron looked at each other. Neither wanted to sing but neither wanted to be seen as the one to back down either. "You can always say no if you're not up for it?" Cain said.

After a few seconds, Aaron stood up. "No, come on, let's do it." As they walked over to take the microphones, he said "What are we going to sing?"

"How the hell do I know, this was your flaming idea. Let's pick one everyone knows then hopefully no one will hear us." They had a look through the songs that were there and Aaron pointed to one. "How about that one?" he asked. Cain nodded. "I'm warning you though, if the song starts and you don't sing, me and you are going to fall out." Everyone in the pub was waiting to hear and see what would happen next. The song started and a big cheer went up. Everyone knew it, Aaron and Cain just hoped everyone would sing along. As the words appeared in front of them, they took a deep breath and began to sing.

When the day is dawning, on a Texas Sunday morning..

Another cheer went up as they carried on singing. They weren't too bad, certainly not the worst that had been heard that night but they were far from the best too. Aaron and Cain looked at each other and couldn't help but smile. The chorus was coming up, the bit everybody knew and they started to relax.

Is this the way to Amarillo, Every night I've been hugging my pillow

Dreaming dreams of Amarillo and sweet Marie who waits for me.

When the song finished, they got the biggest cheer of the night so far. Aaron blushed as he made his way back to the table and sat down. Flynn hugged him and gave him a kiss. "That was brilliant" he said with a big grin on his face. "Yeah, unforgettable" Paddy said trying to keep a straight face. Adam finished wiping his eyes and looked at his best friend. "Oh mate, that was wicked. Best thing I've seen in ages. I'd have paid money to see that." Aaron just smiled and took all the comments in the spirit they were meant. Flynn's dad got up and sang next as did his brother. By this time pretty much everyone who wanted to sing had had a turn. Adam's girlfriend Maddie was one of the last to be called up. "Well I don't know about anyone else but I've had a great time tonight" she said "We've all had a good laugh and rightly so but this is Aaron and Flynn's engagement party and no one's sung anything soppy yet so I'm going to." As the opening bars of the song began to play, some of the older people in the pub smiled, knowing what was coming. The younger ones had no clue, Aaron and Flynn certainly didn't recognise it but they watched Maddie and waited for her to start singing. From the opening lines, they sat transfixed.

For you, there'll be no more crying, For you, the sun will be shining

And I feel that when I'm with you, it's alright, I know it's right.

You could have heard a pin drop in the Woolpack as everyone listened to Maddie sing. Aaron and Flynn looked at each other. Aaron held Flynn's hand tightly as Flynn put his head on Aaron's shoulder and snuggled against him. Anyone who was part of a couple seemed to move closer together and anyone who wasn't who caught someone's eye smiled at the beauty of the words and the song.

To you, I'll give the world, to you I'll never be cold

Cause I feel that when I'm with you it's alright, I know it's right

And the songbirds are singing like they know the score

And I love you I love you I love you like never before.

At the end of the song, there were quite a few teary eyes in the pub, not all of them belonging to the females. Adam stood up and gave Maddie a big cuddle when she got back to the table. "That was beautiful" Flynn's mum said smiling at her.

"Thanks" she said. She looked at Aaron and Flynn. "What did you think? Too soppy? Too girly?"

"No, it was lovely, really lovely" Flynn said. "I've never heard that song before."

"Neither had I til I heard it on Glee" she said matter of factly.

"Glee?" Adam said "You watch Glee."

"Sometimes. I've watched a couple of episodes where my jaws have ached at the end from smiling at the screen. My friend calls it my Glee Grin." She looked at the faces staring back at her. "Probably should have kept that to myself shouldn't I?" Adam said nothing, just nodded his head before kissing her. Aaron turned and said something into Flynn's ear. Flynn nodded and Aaron stood up and headed towards Bob. He took one of the microphones.

"You're not singing again are you love?" Chas called across the pub "A solo this time."

"No, don't worry, once was enough" Aaron said laughing. "I, we, just wanted to say thank you to everyone for coming tonight. We had no clue this was happening and we're really touched that so many of you are here. Mum and Paddy, you're the best. Thanks for organising this, it means a lot to both of us." He gave the microphone back to Bob and went to sit down. Bob played more music as some of the older village residents came over to say goodnight before going home. The party was winding down. "Right, who's up for heading into town?" Adam asked "I feel the need for a boogie." Maddie said yes, as did Aaron, Flynn, Alex, Andy, Victoria and Amy. They ordered taxis, said their goodbyes and headed off.

Invariably, they ended up in Bar West. Adam and Aaron went to the bar to get some drinks while the others waited to one side of the dance floor. It didn't take long for the group to separate, most of them going to dance as soon as they could while Aaron and Flynn stayed put, wanting to be on their own for a while. They saw Adam approach the DJ and say something to him before walking away smiling. A few minutes later, Aaron and Flynn heard the DJ calling their names, asking for them to make themselves known. Everyone from Emmerdale cheered and pointed at them as people turned to look at them. The DJ then announced that they'd just got engaged. A cheer went round the bar as Aaron and Flynn looked at Adam and shook their heads, slightly embarrassed that all these people were now looking at them. The DJ then said there was a drink waiting for them on the house before putting on Kool and the Gang's Celebration. Aaron and Flynn went to dance with all their friends and stayed there for a while before deciding to go and collect their free drinks. They took them to a table and sat down.

"I can't believe tonight" Flynn said.

"I know me either. I was expecting a couple of drinks with me mum and then whatever me and you wanted to do after that."

"I still can't believe her and Paddy went to my house to invite Mum and Dad."

"Bet tonight was an eye opener for them. When the in laws met the outlaws eh?"

Flynn laughed before looking serious. "D'you know what, I can honestly say I've never been happier."

Aaron smiled at him. "Me either." He leant over and kissed Flynn softly and tenderly. At various points through the night, their friends came to sit with them while they took a break from dancing but for a good part they were left on their own, which suited them fine. They were sitting talking, finishing the last of their drink, when they became aware of someone standing next to their table. They looked to see who it was and were surprised to see it was Matt. They hadn't seen a lot of him since he caused all those problems and when they had seen him, they'd kept their distance. "Hi" he said awkwardly.

"Alright" Flynn said, Aaron said nothing. Flynn looked at Aaron, a little anxious that old hostilities would flare up again.

"I heard the announcement. I just wanted to say congratulations." Matt held his hand out to Aaron first who stared at him for a few seconds before taking his hand and shaking it. He then offered his hand to Flynn who shook it too. "So, can I get you both a drink?"

Before Flynn could say anything, Aaron said "Yeah, why not? We'll have another couple of these" showing Matt the bottle he was drinking from. Matt nodded and walked off.

"Well, tonight's full of surprises isn't it? I thought you would have told him where to shove his drink, preferably sideways." Aaron shrugged. "Well it's one less drink we have to pay for isn't it?" Flynn shook his head slightly. "Right, I'm going to nip to the loo. Hopefully I'll be back before Matt returns."

"Don't worry, if you're not, I promise I'll play nicely. Besides, how much trouble can I get into in such a short space of time?"

"You really want me to answer that?" Flynn said as he stood up and walked away. As it happened, Matt returned before Flynn did. He put their drinks on the table and smiled at Aaron, a genuine smile this time, not the smile that Aaron was used to seeing. In fact, his whole demeanour was different. The cockiness was gone and Aaron guessed this was more the Matt that Flynn had known.

"Couldn't bear to be around me eh?" he said looking at the empty seat where Flynn had been sitting.

"He's just gone to the loo" Aaron replied.

"Right. Look, I owe you an apology. I was a proper arsehole for doing what I did. I should never have done it, I was bang out of order and I'm sorry. I genuinely wish you both well. Just don't ever hurt him like I did, treat him the way he deserves to be treated and give him the life he deserves to have."

Aaron looked at Matt's face and studied it. A few months ago, he'd have been on his feet shouting at him, saying don't tell me how to treat my boyfriend, I don't need advice from you but not now. When he looked at Matt's face now, he didn't see any of the arrogance that used to be there. Instead what he saw was someone who still obviously cared about his ex boyfriend and just wanted to make sure he was going to be looked after, that he was going to be ok. Aaron tried to put himself in Matt's shoes and thought he would probably do the same thing. He nodded his head. "I will" he said. Matt smiled at him just as Flynn returned. "Everything ok?" he asked.

"Everything's fine" Aaron said.

"Right, well, I best be getting back. Enjoy the rest of your night."

"Well, that was all very civilised" Flynn said watching Matt's retreating figure.

"Yeah well, there's no point holding grudges is there, life's too short."

"What did that loser want?" Adam said having just walked past Matt. "Sorry, Flynn, no offense" he said as he sat down.

"None taken."

"Same as everyone else" Aaron said "Just wanted to say congratulations."

"Oh right, well that's alright then. Anyway, I just came to tell you, we're off. Me and Alex could murder a kebab so we're going to get one and then we're all heading home. Are you coming?"

"Nah, you're alright, I'll pass" Aaron said wrinkling his nose.

"You know you'll regret it in the morning" Flynn said.

"Yeah I know but it's not a proper night out without a kebab now is it?"

He hugged both Aaron and Flynn before heading off to find the others. Aaron and Flynn stayed to finish their drinks before heading back to Flynn's place where they fell asleep in their usual position, Flynn holding Aaron in his arms.


	54. Chapter 54

The next few weeks after the engagement party were quiet ones. Nothing much happened at all as the day to day routine of normal everyday life took over. While Aaron worked, Flynn didn't do a great deal unless you count meeting Aaron for lunch a couple of times a week although, to be fair to him, there wasn't a lot he could do until he knew whether he'd got his degree. Once he found that out, then he could do something but until that day, their life was in limbo, their plans on hold. The results were due in two days time and both Flynn and Aaron were anxious although they both tried to hide it. Any time it was mentioned, Aaron would reassure Flynn that it would be fine, that he had nothing to worry about and Flynn would reluctantly agree with him. Then, when left to their own thoughts, they would both secretly think about the consequences if the news wasn't good. They would have to live apart for much longer, their wedding would be years and years in the future and their life wouldn't be what they really wanted it to be. So much was riding on this it was scary.

On the day the results were due to be published, a very nervous Flynn logged onto his college's student database and input his password. He'd told his parents and Aaron that he wanted to find out the result on his own, no witnesses and they had agreed, not wanting to stress him out any more than he already was. He found the page he was looking for and scrolled through the list of names but his wasn't there. His heart rate quickened as he phoned the college and spoke to his tutor who told him not all the results had been released yet and not to panic, to try again in the afternoon. Those few hours were some of the longest of his life. Aaron phoned fearing the worst because he hadn't heard from him, his Dad and Mum came home at lunchtime to see if he'd heard, Harrison phoned him too but he had no news for any of them. When he logged on for the second time and tried again, he felt even worse than he had when he'd tried that morning. This time his name was there alongside his result, the word pass jumping out from the screen at him before he jumped up and danced round his room with delight. The first person he phoned was Aaron who shouted so loudly that he made Cain bang his head on the bonnet of the car he was working on. Then he phoned his parents and his brother who were equally as pleased for him before he phoned the office in Newcastle where he'd had the interview. He spoke to the man who'd offered him the job who passed on his congratulations and told him he would get someone from the Hotten office to give him a call back that afternoon which they did. A meeting was arranged for Flynn to bring them proof that he'd obtained his degree and they told him that it would be at this meeting that he would be given his start date and contract. It was only then that it all started to sink in. The next chapter of his life, the grown up one, was about to begin.

The meeting at the Hotten office went well. Flynn had a start date for his new job, which was four weeks away and more importantly confirmation of his salary. He and Aaron now knew what their monthly income would be so they could now start looking for somewhere to live. One Saturday morning, Flynn and Aaron were sitting side by side in Flynn's living room looking again at the properties on the laptop that they were going to see that day. They'd looked at quite a few places and some of them had been real eye openers. They'd learnt that compact meant not big enough to swing a cat in, town centre location meant right on the main road with traffic thundering past all the time and in need of some cosmetic improvement meant the whole place hadn't been decorated since god knew when and needed to be done from top to bottom. It was proving to be a lot harder than they thought but they hoped that the properties they were going to see today would be better. Flynn's mum brought them in a cup of tea and some biscuits so they shut the laptop down and put it to one side. A couple of minutes later, Flynn's dad appeared and they all sat chatting. When Aaron and Flynn had finished their tea, Aaron went upstairs to use the bathroom before they set off.

"While Aaron's upstairs, we've got something for you" Flynn's Dad said handing him a bankbook. "We opened this account in your name not long after you were born. We did the same for Harrison. We've been putting money into it every month but it's yours now. Use it towards your wedding, for your new place when you find it, whatever you want to do with it." He smiled at his youngest son who took the book and smiled back at him. "Thanks, that's great" Flynn said. "Hang on a minute, I haven't finished yet. This" his Dad continued handing over a piece of paper "is something your Nan did. She invested some money for you and told us not to let you get your hands on it until you needed it. Well, now you're going to need it. She'd have been so proud of you, just like we are" he said squeezing Flynn's shoulder before leaving the room, his wife following him. When Aaron came back downstairs a few minutes later, he found Flynn sitting on his own. "Where've they gone?" he asked.

"Kitchen I think" Flynn said. Aaron sat down next to him. "You ok?" Flynn nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. You're not going to believe this" he started before explaining to Aaron what his Dad had just told him.

"Wow, that's brilliant. I've got a rich boyfriend now then have I? Am I going to be a kept man?"

"I wouldn't go that far. Here, have a look." Flynn handed both the book and the piece of paper to Aaron. Aaron quickly added the two figures together, looked at Flynn and grinned. "This must be how people feel when they win the lottery" he said. Flynn grinned back at him. It was nowhere near that amount of life changing money but Flynn knew what he meant. Ten thousand pounds was going to be life changing for them. "Just think what we can do with this money. We could get you a car for a start."

Aaron pulled one of his many faces. "A car? For me?"

"Well yeah. Think about it, if we find somewhere to live in town, which is where we'd like to be, you can't keep getting the bus to work every day. It'll take you ages and cost a fortune."

"Yeah but..."

"But nothing. We can spend the money on what we want."

"I know but.." he stopped mid sentence when he saw the look on Flynn's face. "OK, let's just wait until we find somewhere to live first, then we'll see alright?"

"Alright" Flynn agreed.

"D'you think she'd have liked me?" Aaron asked.

"What?"

"Your Nan, d'you think she'd have liked me?"

"No, she wouldn't have liked you" Flynn said shaking his head. "She'd have loved you. She had a thing for troubled souls and always trying to find the good in people. She used to say to me never judge a book by it's cover. Find out what's inside first, then make your mind up."

"Wise words" Aaron said with a small smile.

"I know. If I'd judged you by your cover, I'd have left you on the shelf."

"Charming. Cheers for that."

"And it would have been my loss" Flynn said before kissing Aaron tenderly.

A few hours later, Aaron and Flynn were sitting in one of the coffee shops in town having seen the properties they were supposed to view. It hadn't gone well and they were beginning to feel a bit disheartened.

"I can't believe they had the nerve to call that cupboard in that house a second bedroom" Aaron said, taking a bite of his toasted sandwich.

"I know and what was that smell in that flat, it smelt like something had died in there" Flynn replied taking a mouthful of coffee. Their elation from earlier had declined with every unsuitable property they'd visited.

"Oh well, we better start looking through these then I suppose." Aaron leant forward and picked up some sheets of paper from the table containing details of more properties to rent. They'd picked them up from various letting agents before they'd gone for their coffee. As they were flicking through them, they heard a knock on the window next to where they were sitting. They looked up to see Joe standing there, smiling at them. Aaron smiled and moved his head, telling Joe to come in.

"Alright Smiler, Flynn" Joe said as he walked over to them.

"Alright" they both said.

"Looks interesting." Joe nodded at the stack of papers.

"Yeah, we're looking to rent somewhere to live. You would not believe what's out there, the sort of places they expect people to live in" Aaron said shaking his head.

"Oh I would, believe me. See, you've been spoilt, living in that lovely village location in that beautiful cottage."

"Yeah I know. So are you joining us?"

"Yeah, why not? Can I get you two a refill?" Aaron and Flynn said yes and gave Joe their order. When he returned, he noticed the matching rings Aaron and Flynn were wearing as they put the papers to one side to make room on the table for the coffees. "Are congratulations in order?" he said with a smile as he sat down opposite them.

"Yeah, we got engaged when we were on holiday" Aaron said.

"Oh mate, that's great news. I hope it was done properly, one knee and all that."

Flynn and Aaron looked at each other and smiled but said nothing.

"So, when's the big day?"

"Give us a chance, we've only just got engaged. Besides, we want to sort out somewhere to live first. That's our priority."

"No point being married if we haven't got our own place is there?" Flynn said.

"Very true. So what are you looking for?"

"Two bedrooms, flat or house, new or old, we're not bothered, just somewhere that feels right." Flynn looked at Aaron who nodded his agreement.

"Where have you tried?"

"Where haven't we tried?" Aaron and Flynn told Joe stories of some of the places they'd looked at and how bad they'd been. Joe listened intently.

"So, we've got a stack more there to go through" Aaron finished. Joe swallowed the last mouthful of his coffee and placed his mug on the table.

"I might be able to help" he said. Aaron and Flynn looked at him.

"Don't tell me, you're not working with old people anymore, you're now a property developer with a load of empty affordable places just waiting for people like us to come along and rent them" Aaron said grinning.

"No but I do know of a two bedroom house that's up for rent. Not far from the town centre, end of terrace, little garden at the back, off road parking at the front."

"Sounds great" Flynn said.

"It is. It's my place."

"Your place?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah. I was promoted not so long ago and I've been offered a job in Leicester. I start next month. It comes with it's own flat so I need to rent my place out. I was just on my way to see some letting agents when I saw you two but obviously I'd rather rent to someone I know rather than strangers."

"Are you serious?"

"Absolutely. There's just one drawback. My contract is initially just for twelve months. If things go well, I'll stay but if they don't, then I'll have to come back. If you're ok with that, come and have a look round, see what you think." Aaron and Flynn looked at each other and couldn't help but grin.

"Is that a yes then?" Joe asked smiling at them.

"What do you think?" Aaron answered.

They left the coffee shop a few minutes later and walked with Joe. After walking for about ten minutes, Joe stopped outside a neat but small looking house. Despite it's closeness to the town centre, the street itself was very quiet with hardly any traffic noise. "After you" Joe said opening the door and standing back to let Aaron and Flynn walk in. They found themselves in a little hallway facing the stairs. There was a door to the left which they walked through that led to a decent sized living room.

"The fridge, freezer, washing machine, dishwasher are all staying because my new place has those built in" Joe said. "Why don't you have a look around, I'll be sitting in the garden when you're done."

When they were on their own, Aaron and Flynn grinned at each other. "I thought it was going to be quite small but it's not" Flynn said looking around, taking it all in.

"I know and it's got wooden floors all the way through down here. That's a winner for me, I hate hoovering" Aaron said emphasising the word hate.

"It'll still need sweeping."

"That's fine, I can sweep. Anything as long as I don't have to hoover."

Flynn took his hand. "Come on, let's have a look at the rest of the place." They walked through into the kitchen which again was a decent size before heading upstairs to look at the bathroom and the bedrooms. They were pleasantly surprised to see that you could get a double bed in both bedrooms as they were roughly the same size.

"So what do you think?" Aaron asked standing at the window looking out over the back garden.

"I love it" Flynn said walking over to join him. "We wouldn't need to decorate and it's got a good feel about it. What about you, can you see us living here?"

"Definitely, it's just what we've been looking for."

"Have we found our first home then?"

"Yeah, I think we have" Aaron said hugging Flynn. "Now for the serious bit. Let's find out how much it's going to cost us."

Joe looked up when he saw them and smiled.

"So, what do you think? Have I found some tenants?"

"It's brilliant, we love it but it depends if we can afford it" Aaron said.

"Why don't I get us something to drink and we'll talk about it."

What Joe was asking was near the top of what they could afford but they were getting a place that they both loved in a great location so it was a no brainer. They took it.

Aaron stood in his bedroom at Smithy Cottage a few weeks later and looked around the room. So many memories were made within these four walls, some good, some bad and a few that would change his life forever. He walked over to the window and looked out at the view for the last time.

"Is that the last of it?"

He turned to see Flynn pointing towards a box on the bed. Aaron nodded. Flynn walked over to him and put his arms around him. "You ok?"

Aaron took a deep breath in. "Yeah and no. I can't wait to live with you but…"

"I know, I understand" Flynn said soothingly pulling Aaron closer to him, rubbing the back of his neck gently. He understood perfectly. To Aaron, Paddy was his Dad. It made no difference to him that they weren't related and he knew what a wrench it would be for him to leave him and this place that had been his safe haven through some of his most troubled times. He moved his head and kissed Aaron softly on the cheek and carried on holding him waiting for Aaron to speak. Aaron pulled back and smiled at him.

"It feels weird knowing this won't be my room anymore" he said looking around.

"This'll always be your room" they heard Paddy say.

"I'll take that and wait in the car" Flynn said picking up the box and smiling at Paddy as he walked past. Paddy stopped him and hugged him even though Flynn's arms were full and he couldn't hug him back. When Flynn had left the room, he turned his attention back to Aaron and it hit him again just how much he would miss him. As pleased as he was for him and Flynn, he knew Aaron moving out would leave a gaping hole in his life that would probably never be filled.

"So this is it then" he said trying to ignore the lump in his throat. Aaron just nodded his head.

"I would say I'm going to miss you but I don't need to tell you that, you already know." He saw Aaron's bottom lip start to tremble and he knew he was as close to losing it as he was. Aaron walked across the room and without saying a word threw his arms around the bigger man and held him tightly as tears fell from both their eyes.

"Thank you for everything" Aaron sobbed "People say it was Jackson that helped sort my head out and he did but it all started with you. You were the one who made me face being gay, who stood by me, never gave up on me and I'll never forget that."

"I did what I did because I knew that the Aaron that I'm holding now was inside that troubled lad somewhere. He just needed someone to believe in him and I did, I still do."

"I love you Paddy" Aaron said through his tears.

"I love you too" Paddy said sniffling.

They separated and both just stood there. Aaron held out his hand. "Your key" he said.

"Keep it. This will always be your home Aaron. You're welcome here any time." Aaron nodded and walked out without a backward glance. Seconds later Paddy heard the door close and found himself engulfed in a deafening silence that he knew he would somehow have to get used to now that Aaron was gone. He heard an engine start and a car drive away as he sat on the bed, looked at the empty room and wiped away another tear.


	55. Chapter 55

Flynn used his foot to shut the front door behind him and walked into the living room carrying two bags of shopping. Him and Aaron had been living together for a few weeks now and they loved it. The house had felt like their own from the minute they'd moved in and, after the initial excitement of having their own place had worn off a bit, they'd settled into living together without a problem. Flynn still saw Nick and his mates from college, Aaron still saw Adam, nothing had changed in that respect and they both felt it was important to keep it that way.

"So you found your way back then? You were only going out for a few bits. Where'd you go to get them, Iceland and I don't mean the shop either?"

Flynn couldn't help but smile at the sight of Aaron standing there, duster in one hand, photo of the two of them in Portugal held in the other. "What can I say, it was busy" he said walking through to the kitchen and putting the bags down "as you'd have seen if you'd come with me."

"But then we'd still have the cleaning to do when we got back whereas now it's done. Oh and if you even think of running your finger over any of the shelves to check I've done them properly and up to your standard, I won't be happy." He put the duster back in the cupboard and turned to find Flynn looking at him. "What? I said if we ever lived together I'd pull my weight didn't I? Besides, now it means I can sit down and relax while you cook my dinner for me." He grabbed a bottle of beer out of one of the bags, kissed Flynn quickly on the lips and walked back into the living room. Flynn smiled to himself and carried on putting the shopping away before preparing their meal. After they'd eaten and the dishwasher was loaded and switched on, they settled down together on the sofa to watch a bit of TV before heading up to bed.

"So are you worried about tomorrow?" Aaron asked as he removed the last of his clothing and climbed into bed next to Flynn. The next day was Flynn's first day at work and Aaron wanted to check he was ok.

"Not worried, a bit nervous but I'm sure it'll be fine." Aaron turned onto his side and looked at him. "It's going to be strange being somewhere where no one knows me."

"Where no one knows you or where no one knows you're gay?"

Flynn smiled. "A bit of both, clever clogs. It's going to be difficult enough being the new starter without being the gay new starter. You never know how people will react do you?"

"No you don't which is why there's no point fretting about it. When they find out, if someone's got a problem with it, we'll worry about it then.

"Yeah, I suppose but…

Aaron shook his head and smiled at him. "But nothing. If they can't accept you, then it's their problem, not yours."

"Easy for you to say, I'm the one who'll have to work with them, not you."

"I know and if it was me, I'd be feeling just like you are but it might not happen. You know what you need?"

"No but I'm sure you're going to tell me."

"Something to stop you thinking about it, take your mind off it for a while." Aaron had that look in his eyes that meant only one thing.

"And you can think of something that would do that can you?"

"Absolutely."

He kissed Flynn tenderly before kissing him harder, darting his tongue into Flynn's mouth as his hands began to touch Flynn's hot smooth body. Flynn pulled him closer and very lightly stroked his chest and stomach as they kissed more passionately, both of them becoming more aroused by the second. Aaron ran his fingers slowly down Flynn's side towards his legs which were already apart, making it easy for Aaron to then slide his hand up the inside of Flynn's thigh before taking hold of his balls. Flynn sighed as Aaron played with them, squeezed them, massaged them, feeling his own body react to Flynn's touch as they continued to kiss, rougher now, more demanding. Aaron moved first, nipping and sucking at Flynn's neck, then moving down to his chest. He bit hard on one of Flynn's nipples, pulling it with his teeth before letting it go and soothing it with a kiss. As he moved lower, he was surprised to hear Flynn gasp "Aaron wait." He looked up wondering why he'd stopped him. "I want to do it to you at the same time." Aaron's smile lit up his face as he kissed Flynn hard on the lips again before moving his body into position. He groaned as he felt Flynn's hand take hold of him and stroke up and down a couple of times before feeling his mouth take in every inch of him. He lay for a couple of seconds, revelling in what Flynn was doing to him before using his tongue to lick up and down Flynn's length, feeling it pulse as he held it before mimicking what Flynn was doing, the taste of him only serving to heighten his excitement. It felt amazing to be giving and receiving pleasure at the same time, even if it meant that one or the other would have to stop briefly when the feelings and sensations that they were experiencing threatened to overwhelm them. Every time one of them moaned or groaned, the vibration caused by the sound would drive the other one closer and closer to mind blowing ecstasy. Aaron felt Flynn's hand press against his arse, pushing him in even deeper as he moved his mouth up and down just the way he liked him to. Aaron was close to coming but he knew that Flynn was closer, the noises he could hear Flynn making and what he could feel in his mouth telling him it wouldn't be long. Trying to ignore the growing pressure inside him that was threatening to explode at any minute, he sucked harder and faster on Flynn, both of them moaning, writhing and breathing heavily. "Aargh, I'm gonna come" Flynn moaned seconds before he did, the sound and the feel and the taste of it triggering Aaron's own orgasm, his body shaking and quivering with the force of it before he flopped back on the bed, gasping for air, his eyes tightly shut. After a few seconds, he felt Flynn moving, turning himself the same way on the bed that he was. He felt warm breath on his face before feeling Flynn's lips press against his own in another full on kiss. He kissed him back, still feeling turned on as Flynn slipped his tongue into his mouth and deepened the kiss even more. Aaron could tell that Flynn felt the same way as him, their bodies starting to show the signs that were impossible to miss. When they paused for breath, Flynn stared into Aaron's eyes. "I want more, I want you inside me" he murmured.

"Funny, I was just going to say the same thing to you."

"Yeah well tough, I asked first" Flynn growled kissing Aaron again, his hands already moving down Aaron's body. As they carried on kissing, Aaron rolled Flynn over onto his back. He liked to be able to see Flynn's face, to watch him react to what he was feeling and knowing that he was responsible for it all really turned him on. It didn't take long for Aaron to prepare Flynn and himself, then he carefully entered him, Flynn gasping as Aaron pushed himself all the way in. Flynn put his arms around him and Aaron leant forward to kiss him again as he began to thrust in and out, slowly at first then harder and faster as his desire intensified. Flynn urged him on telling him how good it felt, telling him not to stop, as if he could just stop. He couldn't have stopped now if his life depended on it. He was close to coming again and watching Flynn lying underneath him, eyes closed, pleasuring himself was doing nothing to hold back the inevitable. He pushed Flynn's hand away, replacing it with his own. As he closed his fingers around Flynn's swollen length, he ran his thumb slowly around the head and across the tip, the wetness he felt along with Flynn's moans and sighs sending him ever closer to the edge. He carried on what Flynn had been doing, moving his hand up and down as he continued to push himself in and out at a speed that must have been dangerous for their health. Moments later, he cried out as he came, feeling Flynn come with virtually the same intensity he just had soon after. It dragged out his own orgasm for a precious few more seconds before he collapsed breathless and panting onto Flynn's chest. Flynn held him close, feeling the goose bumps appear on Aaron's skin wherever his hands made contact as they both waited to recover. Aaron's hot breath against his neck was soon replaced by soft little kisses as he worked his way up to Flynn's mouth and they kissed again, much more tenderly this time. "I love you" Flynn said quietly as Aaron's eyes met his. "I love you too" Aaron said cuddling him. After a few minutes, Flynn reluctantly left Aaron to go to the bathroom.

"You better not be asleep when I get back" he said.

"Why, do you want to go again?" Aaron asked, his eyes dancing mischievously.

"Don't tempt me" Flynn said opening the door. When he returned, Aaron was fast asleep. He smiled to himself before climbing into bed next to him and gently kissing his cheek. "Night gorgeous" he whispered before closing his eyes, sleep not too far away for him either.

Flynn's first week at work went well. There was a lot to take in but everyone he was going to be directly working with seemed really nice. He would be working in a team of eight, a mixture of men and women of all different ages with a lad a few years older than him called Dan acting as his trainer. On the Friday of that first week, he'd been surprised to see Dan disappear and return with a box containing cakes. He told him that Friday was cream cake day, a weekly tradition that had started when they'd had a really bad week. Someone brought them in to cheer everyone up and it had carried on from there. They took it in turns to buy them and Dan told Flynn it would be his turn next. On the following Friday, while one of the team went to make drinks for everyone, Flynn went to the bakery which wasn't very far away to buy the cakes, deciding to get a variety because he'd forgotten to ask what everyone wanted. When he returned, the others were already drinking their drinks and chatting as he placed the large box on the table and told everyone to help themselves.

"Just think, this time next week I'll be sunning myself on a beach in Portugal" a girl about Flynn's age said.

"Yeah alright, don't rub it in Kate" Dan said helping himself to a cake.

"Me and Aaron went there not so long ago, we had a great time, that's where we got engaged." Flynn paused, suddenly realising what he'd just done. It was like time stood still briefly. The words had come out of his mouth without him even thinking about it and now they were hanging in the air between him and his new work mates. He felt his heart thumping in his chest as he looked up at everyone who was now looking at him.

"Isn't Aaron a lad's name or is it one of those that can be used for a lad or a girl nowadays?" asked Graham, the oldest member of the team "I get confused."

"Er no, it's just a lad's name" Flynn answered, going to pick up his cup of coffee but seeing his hand shake slightly, he decided to leave it alone for the time being.

"Right." Graham nodded his head.

"So, you said you're engaged, when are you getting married?" Kate asked "Have you set a date yet?"

"We haven't decided, hopefully next year sometime."

"Have you got a photo? Let's have a look at him then."

"Leave the lad alone" a lady called Margaret said.

"I don't mind, there's some on my phone." Flynn took it out of his pocket and scrolled through, finding one that had been taken while they were on holiday. "Here you go" he said handing it to her.

"Wow, look at those eyes. He's gorgeous, definitely a keeper. Don't suppose he's got an identical twin brother whose straight has he?"

Flynn laughed. "Sorry, no."

"Pity." She handed his phone back to him.

"Listen, I'm having a barbecue on Sunday. You and Aaron should come. Give you a chance to meet some others from here and see this lot away from work although I warn you, it's not always a pretty sight" Dan said smiling at him.

"Thanks, we might do that." Flynn began to relax. No one seemed bothered about his admission. No one had freaked out or told him he wasn't normal, everyone just took it in their stride.

"So is this cake with the pink icing yours then?" Graham asked, a small smile on his face.

Flynn looked at him and could tell he was just having a laugh with him, there was no malice there so he smiled back and finally picking up his coffee said "I prefer the chocolate éclair actually, that one's a bit small for me." The conversation carried on flowing, soon moving on to other things before they went back to work. Flynn sat at his desk and smiled to himself. The thing that he had been dreading was done, it was out in the open now. Soon, it would go round the rest of the office, then he would know if he could completely relax but, the people he would be working the closest with didn't mind and that was good enough for him. The rest of the day went by quite quickly. He got the odd strange look from a couple of people but if that was all that came his way, he could cope. He couldn't wait to get home and tell Aaron that people knew about him, about them and that there wasn't a problem. They went to the barbecue on the Sunday and, from what they could remember, they had a great time. Him and Aaron both went to work on the Monday after with banging heads and a wish that everyone would just be quiet and that the world wasn't so loud.

Some six months later, in the midst of a bleak, freezing cold winter, that afternoon and evening of fun seemed like a lifetime ago and not just because of the weather. Aaron and Flynn weren't getting along and they didn't know why. They still loved each other, still fancied each other although in the last couple of weeks, their sex life had suffered a bit. Little things were starting to irritate and Aaron was the worst culprit. He didn't know what was the matter with him, he felt miserable, down and he took most of his mood out on Flynn. One day in particular had been really bad. Adam had copped a mouthful from him and his mum had been on the receiving end too. Cain caught the end of the disagreement with Chas and after leaving Aaron alone for a few minutes, walked out with two mugs of tea, handing one to Aaron and taking a sip out of his own.

"What's got into you lately? No one can do anything right round you at the moment."

"I know. Everything's just getting on my nerves."

"And everyone by the sound of it. Your mum, Adam and you were really off with Flynn when he phoned earlier." Aaron put his head down and looked at the floor.

"Everything alright at home?"

"It's ok. We're arguing a bit but it's mainly my fault. I'm not easy to live with at the moment."

"I can imagine. Do you want out? Is that what it is?" Cain was as blunt as ever.

"God no, that's the last thing I want." Aaron's response was instant, he didn't even need to think about it.

"So if it's not Flynn, what is it then?"

"I wish I knew. I don't like being like this Cain, hurting the people I care about."

"I know mate but you're the only one who can sort it out and it needs to be done soon. "

"Tell me something I don't know."

Cain took a few mouthfuls of tea. He was worried about Aaron. He hadn't seen him like this in a long time and he didn't like it. He knew what he could be like when he was down and it wasn't very pleasant.

"Here, have a look at this." He handed Aaron a leaflet which he glanced at. "With these new regulations they've brought in, you're due some re training. There's a series of dates available for the course you'll need, one next week in fact. It's in Derby and it runs for three days, Tuesday to Thursday. You can leave here lunch time Monday, give that new car of yours a decent run down the motorway. It might be a good time to go. Give you a bit of space to try and get sorted and give Flynn some peace too. All this can't be easy for him either. It could be just what you need."

Aaron nodded. "Could be." He drained his cup and looked at Cain. "Ok, I'll go."

That evening Aaron sat brooding on the sofa, looking at the TV but not looking at it at the same time. Flynn came downstairs carrying a pile of washing and tripped over Aaron's work boots, which he'd dumped in the hallway when he came in from work.

"Flipping 'eck Aaron, how many times have I told you not to leave them there."

"Plenty of times, every flipping evening it seems. You're always going on about them."

"Well if you put them away I wouldn't have to always go on about them would I?" he said as he walked through to the kitchen.

"I'll put them away when I'm ready. Stop mithering me. You're worse than me mum used to be."

Flynn started the washing machine and came in to sit down next to Aaron. He hated seeing him like this, he felt helpless and just wanted him to get back to himself.

"Maybe you should go to the doctor."

"I don't need a doctor."

"You've been down for a while now. You might have that seasonal adjustment disorder, you know, where people don't get enough of a certain vitamin because of a lack of sunlight or maybe you're depressed and I don't mean just feeling a bit miserable, I mean medically depressed."

"Don't you listen to me, I said I don't need a doctor" Aaron said raising his voice. Instantly, he regretted it. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to shout at you."

Flynn nodded his head. "I'm just worried about you Aaron, that's all."

"I know you are. Look, I really don't think it's medical."

"So is it me?"

"Definitely not." Aaron took his hand. "I'm not a prisoner here, I can walk out that door any time I want to but I don't want to. I just can't shake this feeling and I don't know why. Look, there's a mechanics course next week, something to do with new regulations and re training. Cain thinks it would be a good idea to go. Change of scenery, something a bit different to concentrate on. He thinks it might help."

"It may well do."

"That's why I told him I'd go. I'll miss you though."

Flynn smiled. "I'll miss you too but if miserable Aaron goes on the course and my Aaron comes back, it'll be worth it."

Aaron leant forward and softly kissed him. "Think I'll go and have a bath."

"Want me to scrub your back?"

"Another time. I won't be long." He got up and walked slowly upstairs. He hated feeling like this, hated what he was doing to Flynn, to their relationship but he couldn't help it. If only he could figure out what the problem was, then he could deal with it instead of having to live with this black cloud hanging over him. When he came back downstairs, Flynn was in the same position that Aaron had left him in. "Fancy a brew?" Aaron asked.

"Yeah, cheers."

Aaron walked into the kitchen and put the kettle on. He made the tea and brought out some chocolate biscuits to go with it. They sat cuddled up watching a DVD, Aaron with his arm around Flynn. At times like this, everything felt right again but he knew it wouldn't last for long. When the DVD was over, Flynn took the cups and the leftover biscuits back into the kitchen.

"You coming up?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'll be up in a minute."

"Ok." Flynn kissed him and went upstairs. When he fell asleep almost an hour later, he fell asleep alone.

When Monday lunchtime arrived, Aaron said goodbye to Cain and got into his car. He set off on the long journey still feeling down and arrived at the hotel Cain had booked him into feeling much the same. His mood wasn't helped when he saw there was a queue at the desk meaning he couldn't check in straight away. He sighed and waited in line looking around him. It wasn't the same as the hotel in Newcastle that he and Flynn had stayed in, there'd be no mini bar in his room he was sure about that but there was a bar on the ground floor so that was ok and a restaurant too so it had everything he'd need. Besides, at the end of the day, it was only somewhere to sleep. He glanced up to see a young Indian guy standing at the desk looking at him. He had spiky black hair, skin the colour of milky coffee and the bluest eyes Aaron had ever seen. They were so blue Aaron thought they had to be contact lenses but, whether they were or not, he was stunning to look at. He smiled at Aaron when their eyes met and raised his eyebrows before nodding his head at the couple in front of him who were holding everyone up. Aaron smiled back at him before looking away. By the time the queue started moving and Aaron looked up again, the guy had gone. After waiting a few more minutes, he was finally able to check in and went to his room on the second floor. The first thing he did was phone Flynn to tell him he'd got there safely. They spoke for a while and Aaron promised to phone him tomorrow to let him know how the course was going. After hanging up, he put the TV on and lounged on the bed. This would be the first night since they'd moved in together that he and Flynn would be sleeping apart. The bed seemed huge and empty with just him lying in it and he didn't like it. He hoped that, while he was here, he could figure out what was up with him and find a way to sort it. Not feeling hungry, he stayed in his room until eventually he fell asleep.


	56. Chapter 56

**These characters belong to Emmerdale and ITV.**

Aaron woke up and looked around the unfamiliar room, taking a few seconds to realise where he was. It was still dark and the room was a bit chilly making him shiver as he leaned over to turn the lamp on. He picked up his watch, looked at it and sighed. Five thirty, that meant he'd had three hours sleep, about what he'd been surviving on for a while now. And people wonder why I'm so miserable and short tempered he thought to himself as he snuggled back down under the duvet. Knowing that he wouldn't be able to go back to sleep again, he decided he might as well give some thought as to why he felt the way that he did. His major problem as far as he could tell was a continued lack of sleep so he thought if he figured out why he wasn't sleeping, it was problem solved. He thought hard and realised it had all started after what had happened to Dan. He could still see Flynn's face the day he'd come home and told him that Dan had died. That morning, he hadn't turned up for work and hadn't called in sick. By the afternoon, their boss was worried because it wasn't like him so he went to his house. The curtains were still unopened and there was no answer when he knocked on the door so he called the police. They found him in his bed. He just went to sleep and never woke up again. A few days later, Flynn told him that he'd heard at work that Dan had had an undiagnosed heart condition but it was of no real comfort to them, it was still a shock. A couple of restless nights followed but while Flynn's sleeping had gone back to normal, Aaron's hadn't. He'd just lie awake hour after hour in the darkness. Lying here alone in the lamplight, he suddenly realised that it wasn't that he'd been unable to go to sleep, it was that he'd actually been stopping himself from going to sleep. He thought about how he'd go to bed as usual and close his eyes until Flynn dropped off then lie there, forcing himself to stay awake, fighting sleep with everything he had until eventually his body gave in, usually a few hours before he had to get up. He thought about how he would sometimes watch Flynn while he slept to make sure he was still breathing. Other times he'd just lie in the blackness staring into space thinking about how he could die at any minute, how any breath could be his last. It was morbid and depressing and he hated it but he couldn't help it. Not sleeping had become a habit that he couldn't break and the reason, he now had to admit, was a fear of death. How pathetic was that?

He sat bolt upright in bed. No one liked the thought of dying, of losing people they loved but he'd never heard of anyone thinking the way that he was. This wasn't normal. The way he was behaving wasn't normal and thinking the way he was thinking was definitely not normal. He needed to know if this was just something in his head or if other people suffered like he was doing so he picked up his phone and googled fear of dying. He was shocked when it came up with a proper medical condition. He looked at the word, pretty sure he couldn't pronounce it properly but reading the information, he could certainly identify with a lot of what it was saying. The fear, the anxiety leading to irrational behaviour which with him had manifested itself in self imposed sleep deprivation, it was all there. When he finished reading, he put his phone down and bizarrely felt a sense of relief wash over him. His problem was a genuine problem and had a name and could be sorted if he could get over the embarrassment of telling people that he was abnormally scared of death and dying. He lay there for a bit longer before taking a shower, getting dressed and going for breakfast. When he got to the restaurant, it was full. Everywhere he looked, he could see business people in their suits tapping away on their laptops or families with kids. There didn't appear to be any empty tables anywhere. He was just about to give up on breakfast and leave when he saw one in the far corner so he made his way over to it before someone else grabbed it. The waitress took his order and within a few minutes, his full English breakfast, toast and a cup of tea was placed in front of him. He'd been there about five minutes when he heard a voice next to him.

"Excuse me, would it be alright if I sit here only this place is chocker."

Aaron looked up into the blue eyes of the Indian guy he'd seen yesterday. He was even better looking up close with flawless skin and a dimple in his chin. He smelt lovely and Aaron couldn't fail to notice his slim but muscular physique emphasised by the tight fitting jumper he wore with his dark jeans. He was about Aaron's height, his accent like Alex's, his voice soft. Aaron knew he was telling the truth about the restaurant being busy but he wished he'd chosen someone else to sit with. Feeling just a little uncomfortable, he nodded his head. "Er,yeah, ok" he said.

"Great. Thanks" The lad smiled a warm smile at Aaron as he sat down. The waitress came straight over to take his order and a breakfast similar to Aaron's was soon put in front of him. "So, what brings you here?" he asked as he started eating. Aaron could have done without the small talk. His head was still swimming with what he'd found out that morning but an awkward silence would be unbearable so he just said "Mechanics course."

"No way, really? That's what I'm here for."

"You're a mechanic?" Aaron couldn't keep the surprise out of his voice as he took in the immaculate appearance of the handsome lad sat opposite him. Somehow, him and getting dirty just didn't seem to fit. The lad laughed. "You sound surprised, can't you see me in oily overalls and workboots then?" Aaron blushed slightly. "Er no, it's not that. It's just you look more like you should be selling cars rather than fixing them."

"Do I? I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not. I've seen some horrible car salesmen. You should see the lot we've got at our place. No, I love getting me hands dirty. Give me a car to fix and I'm happy as Larry whoever he might be. Mind you, I could do sales I suppose. I don't find it difficult to talk to people, I can talk for England, I never shut up."

"I can imagine" Aaron said, a small smile playing across his lips.

"Sorry, here's me banging on and you just want to enjoy your breakfast in peace."

"No you're alright. It'd be worse if we were sat here in silence."

"If you knew me, you'd know I don't do silence, I've been told I even talk in me sleep. I'm Tariq by the way."

"Aaron."

"So, you been a mechanic long?"

"A few years, you?" Aaron found himself drawn into a conversation, a welcome distraction that stopped him brooding about his own problems. They chatted until they'd both finished their breakfast, then they left to go to their rooms which they found out were only a few doors away from each other. They decided to travel together to the course because Aaron couldn't find the directions and had no sat nav with him. The day went by quickly as Aaron concentrated on what he was told to do. He joined in the conversations with the others but was still quiet. Tariq, on the other hand, spoke to and had a laugh with everyone. He obviously hadn't been lying when he'd said he found it easy to talk to people. At the end of the day, they stopped off on the way back to the hotel to grab some food before making their way up to their rooms.

"Fancy a drink later?" Tariq asked. "Me and a couple of the others are meeting up."

"Oh, er, no thanks, best not."

"Are you sure? It's got to be better than staring at four walls all night."

Aaron thought about it. The prospect of being on his own for the evening wasn't appealing but at the same time, he was wary of spending more time with Tariq.

"You're probably right but I'll still pass."

"Ok but if you change your mind, you know where to find us."

They parted company and Aaron went into his room. The first thing he did was phone Flynn to tell him about his day. They spoke for a while but he didn't mention his theory on what was wrong with him or what he'd found out. He was still getting used to the idea himself. After they'd finished speaking, he showered, got changed and lay on his bed. He watched TV for a couple of hours before he felt himself getting tired. He didn't want to go to sleep so he decided maybe a drink wasn't a bad idea after all. He grabbed his wallet and room key and went down to the bar. It was busy as he looked around to see if Tariq was still there. He was, sitting at a table with a couple of the other lads from the course. Aaron made his way over. "Alright" he said.

"Hey, you changed your mind then" Tariq replied smiling up at him. He'd been hoping Aaron would make an appearance.

"Well, as interesting as the four walls were, I decided I could do with a drink after all."

"You timed that well mate" one of the other lads said "It's my round. Lager is it?"

"Yeah, cheers" Aaron said as he sat down opposite Tariq. The four of them got on well, they were all roughly the same age so had a lot in common and the conversation flowed. When all their bottles were empty, Aaron offered to buy the next round. The two other lads declined and said goodnight leaving just him and Tariq.

"So are you having another one?" he asked.

"Yeah, that'd be good."

"Right, back in a bit."

A few minutes later, Aaron returned and held out a bottle of lager to Tariq who noticed again the silver ring that he was wearing on his wedding finger. He took the drink, had a couple of mouthfuls and placed the bottle on the table as Aaron sat down opposite him again. They'd been chatting for a couple of minutes when Tariq's phone rang. He looked at it and smiled. "Better get this or I'll be in big trouble" he said.

"Do you want me to go?" Aaron asked

"Don't be daft, you're fine" he said placing the phone to his ear. "Hiya babe… yeah I'm fine, you?….it was ok actually, not too bad….in the bar…ha, you know me so well…no, I'm with one of the lads from the course….no I won't drink too much….ok I'll talk to you later, bye." He put his phone away and looked at Aaron. "Sorry about that" he said.

"That's alright. The missus checking up on you eh?" Aaron asked.

"Er no, the mister actually." Tariq fixed his eyes on Aaron, watching for his reaction. He thought he saw something in Aaron's eyes but he wasn't sure. "So has your wife checked up on you yet? I saw your ring when you handed me my drink."

Aaron smiled. "I'm not married, well not yet anyway, it's an engagement ring and no, he won't be checking up on me. I've already spoken to him tonight."

Tariq nodded his head and smiled back. No more was said about their personal lives. They were both gay, both in relationships, what more was there to say? They continued chatting, mainly about the course but about other stuff as well. Tariq was good company and Aaron found his sunny personality infectious. He hadn't had a laugh like this in a long while and for the first time in ages, he forgot all about his problems. It wasn't long before their bottles were empty again. "Fancy another?" Tariq asked.

"Err, I dunno."

"Come on, you're here now, you might as well."

Aaron thought for a couple of seconds before saying "Go on then, I'll have the same again."

Tariq got up and went to the bar. As he waited to be served, he thought about Aaron. He'd liked him from the moment he'd seen him in the hotel reception yesterday even though he'd looked all mean and moody. Then, he'd smiled back at him and his whole face changed, making him even more attractive. This was the first time in the year that he'd been with Ben that someone else had interested him like this. He'd never seriously looked at anyone else before but there was just something there between them, he could sense it and the scary thing was that he had a feeling that Aaron could sense it too. Sitting at the table, Aaron chewed on his lip and thought. He shouldn't have agreed to another drink. He should have made his excuses and left when he had the chance. The more time he spent with Tariq, the more he was attracted to him and he thought the feeling was mutual which made it dangerous. He got up and went quickly over to the bar.

"Look mate, forget about the drink. I'm just gonna go back to my room."

"Oh, ok. Are you alright?"

"Yeah fine. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Alright, see you tomorrow." Tariq watched Aaron go before turning back round to find the barman looking at him. "Oh er, sorry" he said suddenly not in the mood for a drink. "I've changed my mind." He went up to his room and lay on his bed thinking. He had a boyfriend he loved yet it was Aaron and those eyes and that shy little smile that he did that occupied his thoughts. It was wrong, plain and simple yet he couldn't help it. Unknown to him, a few doors down, Aaron was lying awake thinking too. He couldn't get his head around why he felt attracted to Tariq when he was engaged to his perfect man. He hadn't fallen out of love with Flynn but Tariq just did something to him. For tonight at least, he had a new reason to keep him awake.

The next morning, Aaron got up especially early in the hope of being finished his breakfast before Tariq turned up for his. He'd decided to try and stay out of his way as much as possible but it wasn't going to be easy when they were staying in the same hotel, attending the same course. As he entered the restaurant, he looked around and the first person he saw was Tariq. With the restaurant virtually empty, it was impossible to avoid him so he walked over. "You're up early" he said.

"Yeah, couldn't sleep" Tariq replied. "What's your excuse?"

"Same as yours."

Tariq couldn't believe Aaron was up early too. He'd hoped to be back in his room before Aaron came down for his breakfast but obviously that wasn't going to happen. Not wanting to act too weird in front of him after how well they'd gotten on yesterday, he said "Are you joining me?" Aaron couldn't very well refuse so he smiled and sat down. It didn't take long for the two of them to relax a bit and start talking again like they had before. That day, Aaron drove himself to and from the course and went straight to his room that night and stayed there away from temptation.

The last day went by quite quickly and before they knew it, Tariq and Aaron were driving themselves back to the hotel for the last time. Aaron felt better in himself than he had done in a long time. He'd even managed to sleep for a whole five hours the night before. He felt ready to tell Flynn what he thought his problem was and to get some help for it, no matter how embarrassed he felt. He'd nearly told him on the phone last night but he'd decided he wanted to tell him face to face. He pulled into the hotel car park a few seconds ahead of Tariq, just as it began to rain heavily. They both locked their cars and ran into the hotel.

"Well I'm glad that's over with. Back home tomorrow" Aaron said.

"Yeah. I'm looking forward to getting back."

"Me too." They stood side by side in the lift as Tariq pressed the button for the second floor. An awkward silence fell between them which continued as they made their way down towards their rooms. When they reached Aaron's room, they both stood, neither knowing what to say. Tariq eventually spoke. "Right, shower and something to eat for me. You could join me if you want."

Aaron jerked his head up to look at him, a questioning look on his face. "For something to eat I mean, obviously not for the shower." Tariq looked mortified and averted his eyes. Aaron couldn't help but smile and yet again thought how hot he was. "Anyway, I'll see you" Tariq mumbled as he hurried off towards his own room. Aaron thought about how they'd probably bump into each other in the restaurant anyway so he called after him. Tariq stopped and turned around.

"I'd like that" he said "The meal, not the shower." He smiled and Tariq smiled back.

"Alright. I'll meet you in an hour." As Aaron entered his room, his phone rang. It was Flynn phoning to ask if he knew what time he'd be home tomorrow as he'd taken the day off work so he could be there to meet him. On hearing his voice, Aaron instantly felt guilty even though he hadn't done anything wrong unless you count agreeing to have dinner with some guy that he found really fit and had been thinking about a lot over the past couple of days. The conversation was short with Aaron saying he'd let him know tomorrow. After he showered, he got changed and left his room. He checked his door was locked and turned to see Tariq walking down the corridor towards him. He looked him up and down and liked what he saw, then he told himself off. Tariq was having a similar chat with himself as he saw Aaron waiting for him. They had their meal and went into the bar for a drink. When their bottles were empty, Tariq asked if Aaron wanted another. He hesitated before he answered. He'd had every intention of leaving after one drink but now he wasn't sure he wanted to go.

"Aaron?" He heard Tariq calling him. "Yes or no?"

"I shouldn't. I don't want to be still over the limit tomorrow."

"You've had three beers. Two with dinner and this one. Come on, live a little. You're a long time dead." Aaron laughed. "Well you are" Tariq continued "Besides, I like your company." His face fell serious as he waited for Aaron to react. He couldn't help himself. He'd tried to bury his attraction to Aaron but it was no good. Aaron's heart beat a little bit quicker as he held Tariq's gaze. There was a definite spark between them, one that he'd been trying to ignore since they'd met but he wasn't doing a very good job of it.

So, are you having another one or not?" Tariq asked again.

"Yeah, yeah I will."

They had another drink before deciding to call it a night. They went up to the second floor and walked down towards their rooms. They reached Aaron's room first. He took out his room key and held it ready to use. Neither really knew what to say, the air around them crackled with electricity or so it seemed to them. Tariq eventually broke the silence. "Well, I best get to bed. Don't want to be over tired for that drive home. It was nice meeting you Aaron." Blue eyes locked onto even bluer ones as Aaron said "You too." He smiled shyly and Tariq's stomach somersaulted. He smiled back but he didn't move and neither did Aaron.

"I thought you were going" Aaron said quietly.

"I was but I don't want to. And I don't think you want me to either." Tariq moved into Aaron's personal space and kissed him softly on his lips. He pulled back and looked into Aaron's eyes, to see if he had permission to do it again. As he searched his face for an answer, he thought he saw a slight nod of Aaron's head but he wasn't sure. He moved towards him anyway and with his eyes closed, kissed him again. This time he got the approval he wanted as he felt Aaron kiss him back. They both knew it was wrong but at that moment in time, they weren't thinking about the consequences. This was a purely physical attraction that had been present since they'd first seen each other and both of them couldn't ignore it any longer. The kiss was hungry, hard and demanding and left both of them in no doubt that they wanted more. Aaron eventually broke the kiss and breathing deeply looked at Tariq. He said nothing, just opened the door to his room and walked in, leaving it open behind him. He walked towards the bed placing his phone and the room key on the bedside table. He had his back to the door as he heard it close and turned to see Tariq standing there looking at him. Neither spoke, they just kissed again, pressing their bodies together as their tongues played with each other. Aaron felt Tariq's hand move from around his waist to travel up inside his jumper, working it's way up to his chest where he lightly caressed his skin before playing with one of his nipples. Aaron sighed into the kiss as his own hand travelled down to grab the bulge in Tariq's jeans that he could feel pressing against his own. As he stroked it through the heavy material, he found himself wondering whether Tariq looked as good without his clothes on as he did with them on. They tumbled onto the bed as the physical need they both had now overtook them completely. Clothes were quickly removed and discarded, the only sounds in the room their sighs and moans as naked skin touched naked skin, both pleased with what they saw. Suddenly, a new sound was added. A phone was ringing and it wasn't Aaron's. He paused to look at Tariq, to see what he wanted to do. His response was to roll on top of Aaron and kiss him passionately as he ground their hips together. The phone rang and carried on ringing until suddenly it went silent leaving just the sighing and moaning that had been present before.

The next morning, Aaron woke up lying on his side. He felt warm and cosy and comfortable, feelings that lasted a few seconds as the events of the night before entered his consciousness. Then those lovely feelings were replaced by feelings of nausea, fear, guilt and panic. What had he been thinking of? That behaviour, what he'd done last night, that wasn't him. He'd never behaved like that before. He'd heard people say that they just couldn't help themselves and he'd thought it was an excuse because they were just too weak to say no. He'd never believed it could be true until last night. Neither had hidden the fact that they had boyfriends but still they couldn't resist. Aaron cautiously turned over to find he was alone in the bed. He didn't know whether to be pleased or not. Then he heard the sound of the toilet flushing and water being run in the sink. Shortly after, Tariq came out of the bathroom fully clothed and seeing Aaron looking at him smiled a small smile.

"I didn't know what to do. Whether to leave or stay, whether you'd want to talk to me or not but sneaking out didn't seem right." Aaron smiled awkwardly at him and pulled the duvet up higher as he sat up in bed. Tariq sat down and looked at him. "I don't know about you but I feel terrible."

Aaron nodded his head. "Me too. What have we done?" he asked putting one hand over his mouth and pulling on his bottom lip. Reality had dawned and kicked them both hard.

"Cocked up big time."

"Nice choice of words."

"Sorry. I wasn't trying to be funny. I've never been a cheat, ever. I've always hated people who cheat and now I'm one of them. There was just something about you.." he stopped mid sentence.

"I know, I understand, you don't need to explain" Aaron said quietly. They sat in silence, both lost in their thoughts.

"What are you going to do?" Aaron asked.

Tariq shook his head. With tears in his eyes he said "Go home and tell him. I've got no choice, I can't lie to him. Then I suppose I'll have to take whatever he gives out. This'll kill him." He sniffed and stood up. "Anyway, it's not your problem. I knew what I was doing. You didn't hold a gun to me head. I better go."

Aaron said nothing. Once he heard the door shut, he looked down at his left hand, at the silver band he proudly wore and his bottom lip started to quiver. The enormity of what he'd done hit him like a ton of bricks and he broke down and cried like a baby. He had no excuses. Like Tariq, he'd known exactly what he was doing and like Tariq, he also knew he'd have to confess. There was no way he could keep quiet about this. The guilt was already starting to eat away at him and he knew once he saw Flynn, it would consume him completely. He also knew there was no way Flynn would forgive him for this. Most other things, yes but not this. This would destroy him, reopen old wounds, shatter his confidence all over again and it was all his fault. He'd ruined all their plans and dreams for one night with a virtual stranger. He pulled the duvet up over his head and hid from the world, wishing he could stay hidden forever but knowing he couldn't. Today, he'd have to go home and break Flynn's heart, just not yet, he couldn't do it yet.


	57. Chapter 57

Forty miles Aaron had driven, forty miles with a churning stomach and a feeling of dread and sorrow hanging over him. He was barely able to concentrate on driving, his mind elsewhere. After showering, he'd left the hotel without having anything to eat and without having seen Tariq again. Before starting the car, he'd sent Flynn a text giving him a rough idea of when he'd be home, too scared to talk to him in case his voice gave away the fact that something was very wrong. Just thinking about him was enough to bring a lump to his throat and tears to his eyes which he wiped away with his hand or his sleeve. As he drove along, he could hear his stomach rumbling reminding him that although he didn't feel hungry, his body needed food so when he saw a sign for a service station he pulled in. He parked his car and walked slowly to the busy restaurant area where he picked up a sandwich and a cup of coffee. He paid and took them outside to sit down at one of the tables. It was a crisp, freezing cold day which meant that, apart from the smokers, he was the only other person not inside in the warm. He took a sip of his coffee and a bite of the sandwich, watching as his breath made clouds in the air. The sandwich was finished within seconds but he took longer over his coffee, wondering how on earth he was going to tell Flynn what he'd done. He'd had some difficult conversations in his time, most of them about things he'd had no control over but this was different. He'd caused this situation and it could have been avoided had he thought with his head and not with something else last night. Disgusted with himself, he threw his litter in the bin and headed back to his car to finish his journey.

When he pulled up outside his house, he turned the ignition off and just sat there. He felt sick and emotional and he hadn't even seen Flynn yet. After a couple of minutes, knowing that he couldn't put it off forever, he got out of the car, collected his bag from the boot and opened the front door. The house felt warm and cosy as he put his bag down by the stairs and walked into the living room. "Hey, you're back." Flynn greeted him with a huge smile as he walked over and hugged him. Aaron held him tightly, not wanting to let him go. When their lips met, he tried to savour every second of their kiss because, although he was prepared to fight for their relationship with everything he had, he couldn't help but worry that this would be the last time he'd get to do this. When they pulled apart, he took Flynn's hand and silently walked over to the sofa. It was only when they were sitting side by side that Flynn realised that something wasn't right. He'd thought Aaron's face was pale because he'd just come in from the cold but now he wasn't so sure and he looked like he'd been crying too.

"Are you ok? You don't look too good" he asked, his voice full of concern.

"No, no I'm not ok. I've er, I've got something to tell you but I don't know how."

Flynn fixed his eyes on Aaron's and tried to ignore the feeling of panic that was starting to build up inside him. In a quiet voice, he said "Just say it Aaron. Whatever it is, just tell me."

Aaron sniffed, swallowed and began to talk. "There was this lad on the course, Tariq. He was fun to be around, a good laugh, everyone liked him. He told me he had a boyfriend, I told him I was engaged to you, I never thought for one minute that something would happen between us but it did." He dropped his head, unable to look at Flynn any longer.

"Well, what happened? You got drunk and kissed each other or something worse."

Aaron looked into Flynn's eyes which were kind of glazed over. "Something worse. I'm so sorry Flynn" was all he could get out before he began to cry. Flynn sat in stunned silence, his heart pounding in his chest. "You, you slept with him." He finally managed to force the words that were in his head out of his mouth.

"No, no I didn't. We did some other stuff but we never had sex I swear to you."

"What did you do then?"

"Flynn, please." Aaron shook his head.

"What did you do?" Flynn repeated the question.

"About as much as you can do without actually having sex, which we didn't, you have to believe me" Aaron pleaded.

"Why?"

Aaron wiped his eyes and looked at Flynn. "Because I'm telling the truth."

"No, I mean, why didn't you have sex? You were there in bed with him doing "other stuff" as you so eloquently put it, so what stopped you?"

"Does it matter?"

"To me it does, yeah. I want to know." Flynn was desperately clinging to the small hope that Aaron would say something like because I came to my senses and stopped it before it got that far or because I couldn't go through with it but his small hope was shattered with Aaron's next brutally honest answer.

"We didn't have any condoms" he said quietly. "You have to understand, it wasn't planned, we hadn't talked about it beforehand, one thing just led to another and it just happened. I wish to God it hadn't and if I could go back and change things, I would…"

"I think I'm going to be sick" Flynn interrupted as he bolted upstairs. Aaron heard the bathroom door being locked as the sound of Flynn's sobs drifted down the stairs. With his eyes closed, he banged his head a couple of times against the back of the sofa, not knowing what to do or say next. Eventually, the sobbing stopped and an eerie silence descended on the house. After half an hour, when Flynn still hadn't returned, Aaron went upstairs and stopped outside the bathroom door. He knocked on it gently. "Are you ok? Well, obviously you're not ok but you know what I mean." He got no reply. "Flynn please, I know how much I've hurt you and I know what I've done is wrong and you'll never know how bad I feel but you can't hide in there forever. We can't try to sort things out if you won't talk to me." Again, nothing. "Look, please, come out or let me in. You can shout at me, hit me, do whatever you need to do but please…."

The sound of the door being unlocked stopped him in his tracks as Flynn came storming out of the bathroom, barged past him and ran downstairs. Aaron charged down the stairs behind him and stood blocking the front door as Flynn grabbed his coat and keys and picked up his phone.

"Please Flynn, don't go, I'm begging you, don't leave."

"Get out of the way Aaron." Flynn's tear stained face and red rimmed eyes were horrible for Aaron to see and his tone, quietly menacing, disturbed him. If he was kicking off, shouting and screaming at him, that he could understand and cope with but this calmness was un-nerving.

"No, not until we've talked. Not until you say something."

"You want me to say something, right, I'll say something." He walked a few steps closer to Aaron. "You disgust me and just being near you makes my skin crawl." His emotions began to rise to the surface once again as he spoke through gritted teeth. "I never thought you could do anything that would make me feel this bad. You've ruined everything. All our plans, our dreams, our future, you've destroyed the lot and I will never, ever forgive you." His tears were in freefall now as were Aaron's. "Now, I don't want to talk to you, I don't want to see you, I don't even want to breathe the same air that you breathe so get out of my way. I won't ask you again."

Aaron didn't move, couldn't move. Every word Flynn had said had hit him as if it had have been Flynn's fists doing the talking. Suddenly, he felt Flynn grab him. "I said, get out of my fucking way" he shouted as he pulled Aaron away from the door and threw him against the wall. "You want someone to talk to, talk to him" he said emphasising the word him "You can compare notes on how it feels to have ruined two relationships for your one night together." With that, he flung the door open and slammed it shut behind him as Aaron slipped down the wall and sat sobbing. Once he'd composed himself and the shock of being manhandled by Flynn had started to wear off, he walked back into the living room, picked up his phone and dialled Adam's number.

"Hiya pal, when did you get back? How was the course?"

"Adam, look can you come round? I really need you mate."

Adam's cheerful tone was gone in a flash when he heard his friend's voice "Yeah, course I can. What's happened? Are you alright?"

"I erm, I, I just please, can you get round here?" Aaron could say no more.

"Yeah, ok, listen to me. I'm on my way, right. I'm coming straight round. I'll be there as soon as I can." Aaron ended the call without saying another word and dropped his phone on the sofa next to him.

When Adam arrived, and Aaron opened the door to let him in, he was shocked to see the state of him. The last time he'd seen him looking this bad was when Jackson had died. "Aaron, what's happened? What's wrong? Is it Flynn? Is he ok?" he asked, noticing that Flynn wasn't there. Aaron sat back down on the sofa without saying a word. Trying to remain calm, Adam sat down beside him. "Come on mate, talk to me. You can tell me anything, you know that." Aaron slowly nodded his head and began telling Adam what he'd just confessed to Flynn. Adam sat in silence, shocked at what he was hearing. "I can't believe it. I don't know what to say? How could you have been so stupid?"

"I know, alright, I know. I don't need you telling me what an idiot I've been."

"What the hell were you thinking Aaron?

"I don't know. I just couldn't get him out of my head but it was a mistake. It wasn't worth it, it wasn't worth hurting the only person that really matters to me."

"So you do still love Flynn then."

"Of course I love him. Would I be in this state if I didn't? You should have seen him Adam. He said I make his skin crawl, that I disgust him."

"He was angry, lashing out that's all. I'm sure he didn't mean it."

"Oh he meant it alright. He hates me." His voice caught in his throat as he began to cry again. Adam put his arms around him and hugged him, not knowing what else to do. Suddenly, Aaron stood up and walked towards the front door.

"What are you doing?" Adam asked.

"I'm going to look for him. I can't just sit here knowing he's out there somewhere in that state."

"No, that's not a good idea mate." Adam grabbed Aaron and stood in front of him. "He needs some space. If you go after him now, you'll make things ten times worse."

"They can't get any worse" Aaron said.

"Trust me Aaron, they can. I know it's difficult but you need to leave him alone for tonight. He'll probably go to Nick's, have a few drinks and sleep it off on the sofa." Grudgingly, Aaron nodded his head and flopped back down on to one of the chairs.

"Look, I don't mind staying here tonight if you want some company."

Aaron smiled gratefully at him. "Cheers, that'd be good."

"Right, I'll make us a brew then. Why don't you stick the TV on?"

"After I've phoned him" Aaron said "You can't stop me doing that."

Across town, in a bar that he didn't go into very often, Flynn drained the last mouthful of lager from his bottle and added it to the four empty ones on the table. He'd deliberately picked this place because if Aaron came to look for him, he'd never think to look here. He was all over the place, devastated by Aaron's revelation. He would never have believed him capable of doing that, not his Aaron, except he wasn't his Aaron anymore. Someone else had been there, shared things with him that only he should be sharing and it broke his heart. A couple of hours ago, he was engaged to his perfect man, they had a wedding to look forward to, a future together and now it was all gone. He blinked away his tears and put his head down, lost in his thoughts.

"Fancy some company?" a voice asked.

Without even looking up, Flynn said "No and if I did, I wouldn't want yours."

Matt sat down anyway and put his glass on the table. "Are you on your own?"

"Do you see anyone else with me?" Flynn replied sarcastically. Matt just looked at him. "Look, I said I don't want company so just go back to your friends and leave me alone, alright?"

Matt turned to look at his mates who were standing at the bar wondering what was going on before looking back at Flynn. "I can't leave you in this state."

"Yeah, you can" Flynn snapped. Just then his phone rang. He looked at Aaron's name flashing on the screen before pressing ignore and looking back at Matt. "Well, if you're not going to go, you can get me another drink."

"Don't you think you've had enough?"

"No, I've had nowhere near enough." He stood up and wobbled a bit before grabbing the table for support.

"Look, you sit down, I'll get it." Matt walked over to his mates and told them he was staying with Flynn before buying a bottle of lager and taking it back to him. Flynn looked at it but didn't touch it.

"It doesn't take a genius to figure out something's happened between you and Aaron" Matt said quietly. "Why don't I run you back home?"

"I don't want to go home."

"Ok, what about your Mum and Dad's place then, or your brother's?"

Flynn shook his head. "Mum and Dad are away and Harrison's girlfriend's just had a baby. They've got enough on their plate."

"So what are you going to do, walk the streets all night?"

"Maybe. What's it got to do with you what I do?"

"Because you wouldn't last five minutes the state you're in. You'd be an easy target. Why don't you come back to mine?"

Flynn glared at him. "I'd rather stick pins in my eyes."

"Don't be stupid Flynn. Come back to mine and sleep it off." Flynn's phone rang again, interrupting them. "Aren't you going to answer that?"

"Nope" Flynn said and pressed ignore again.

"So, are you coming back to mine or not?"

All the fight had gone out of Flynn now, he didn't have the energy to be horrible to Matt anymore, he didn't have the energy for anything so he just nodded his head, picked up his phone and walked towards the exit.

When they entered Matt's apartment, Flynn waited by the door while Matt switched the lights on. "I'll put the kettle on, make yourself at home" Matt said indicating the sofa. Flynn walked over to it and sat down. He wasn't feeling well at all. His anger had now completely disappeared, replaced by an overwhelming feeling of sadness and emptiness. His phone rang again. Flynn stared at the screen before switching it off and throwing it on the table in front of the sofa.

"Do you want tea or coffee?" Matt called from the kitchen.

"Whatever, I don't care" Flynn said flatly. Matt returned a couple of minutes later with two mugs of coffee, handing one to Flynn before sitting down on the sofa next to him. They drank in silence before Flynn finally spoke. "You haven't asked what's happened yet."

"That's because it's none of my business. Its between you and Aaron. I just wanted you to be safe tonight that's all but, if you want to talk, I'll listen."

Flynn looked at his ex boyfriend. Since his apology that night in Bar West, the three of them had been getting on better. They could even hold a civilised conversation now and while he wouldn't be his first choice of confidante, he was here and he didn't know how much longer he could keep his emotions in check. "Let's just say you and him aren't as different as I thought you were" he said quietly. It didn't take long for Matt to get what Flynn meant. "Oh, I see. I'm sorry."

"Not as sorry as I am believe me. First you, now him. What is it with me?"

Matt paused before speaking, choosing his words carefully. "What I did was my choice, it wasn't your fault, I told you that and whatever Aaron did wasn't your fault either. Has it been going on for long?"

Flynn shook his head. "It was a one off, when he was away on a course. He told me as soon as he got back. I bet you're loving this aren't you?" he said, thinking maybe he'd made a mistake telling him.

"No I'm not. When I first came back, maybe it would have made me happy but not now."

"How could he do it? If he loves me, how could he go with someone else?" Flynn's tear filled eyes looked at Matt waiting for his answer.

"Did you ask him?"

"I couldn't. I couldn't be near him. As soon as he told me I had to get out. I had to get away from him."

Matt paused again. "You said it was a one off, right? Maybe it was one of those occasions where you meet someone and there's a spark there that you can't ignore, no matter how hard you try."

"That's crap, he should have tried, he should have ignored it. I would have."

Matt shook his head. "You don't know that, not for definite. It's not that simple Flynn, it's not black and white. We all like to think we'd do the right thing but until you're in that situation, you don't know what you'd do."

Flynn could feel himself getting angry. "Well, there's a surprise, one cheat defending another. "

"I'm not defending him. What he did was wrong but I'm just saying it's not as simple as you're making it out to be. Look, he's done something awful and he's hurt you but he told you as soon as he could. He didn't have to do that but he obviously couldn't lie to you. Even though he knew it might end your relationship, he had to come clean, that must tell you something. He'll never forgive himself for what he's done, even if you eventually forgive him because your face when he told you will be in his head forever. He'll never get rid of that image, I know, and don't think he's not feeling just as bad as you are because he will be, in fact he'll probably be feeling worse because whatever he thinks or feels is irrelevant now. It's out of his hands because what happens next is up to you. You have to decide if you can get over this or not, if you're going to stay with him or walk away but it's not a decision to be made when you've had a skinful and you're hurt and angry like you are right now."

Flynn nodded his head, twisting his engagement ring around his finger. He knew Matt was right. The thought of being without Aaron was devastating but he'd betrayed him, shattered his trust and broken his heart. Tears began to flow down his cheeks as the enormity of what he faced hit him. Tentatively, Matt reached out and rubbed Flynn's arm. It was a comforting gesture, nothing more and Flynn needed to be comforted. He slowly leant against him as Matt put his arms around him and held him while he cried. After a while, Matt stood up and smiled at him. "That's my bedroom" he said nodding towards a door. "You can sleep in there. It's got an en suite. If you feel ill in the night, you won't have to go and look for the bathroom. I'll sleep in the spare room."

"No I'll sleep in the spare room, it's fine."

"Don't be daft, it makes sense for you to sleep in there."

"Thank you."

"No worries. I'll see you in the morning." He took the empty mugs into the kitchen and left Flynn with his thoughts.

Flynn woke up the next morning with a banging headache and a nasty taste in his mouth. His tongue felt furry and when he tried to sit up, the room spun and he felt so sick, he had to lie back down again. It had gone three in the morning before he'd fallen asleep. His head had been arguing with itself, one side saying that he had no choice, he had to leave Aaron, he couldn't trust him anymore, the other side saying but this was Aaron, the person he'd loved from the moment he'd seen him, who made him feel things no one else had or could, who he didn't want to not have in his life. As he lay there, he wondered how Aaron was feeling this morning, if he felt as miserable and as lost as he did, if he'd missed him and missed sleeping next to him like he had done. More tears fell as he tried to cry quietly.

Adam came downstairs to find Aaron huddled up on the sofa. He could tell he'd been crying again and he felt helpless, knowing there was nothing he could do to make him feel better. He sat down next to him and smiled at him.

"How long have you been up?" he asked.

"Dunno. I woke up about two and couldn't go back to sleep."

"We only went to bed at midnight, you must be shattered." Aaron didn't answer. "I'll make you a brew. Do you want something to eat?"

Aaron's voice was barely audible. "He didn't call Adam. He never sent a text, nothing. I don't know where he is or if he's coming back." A tear rolled down his cheek as he sniffed. "What am I going to do without him?"

"Hey, he'll come back. He just needed to cool off, have some time to himself. You'll see, he'll be home today and you can sort things out, talk properly."

"I can't lose him Adam, not after everything we've been through. How can I tell him how sorry I am, how stupid I've been, that I'll do anything to make it up to him if he's not here to listen. If he leaves me, that's it, I'm done."

"Hey, don't talk like that." Adam's voice grew stern. "You don't know what he's going to do yet."

"No but I know what I'd do if I was him. I don't think I could forgive me and I certainly wouldn't want to be touched by me, not after what I've done" he said, wiping away the tears with his wet sleeve.

"Yeah but you're not Flynn are you? Now, you find us something to watch on TV, I'll go and get you that brew."

Flynn walked out of the bedroom to find Matt sitting watching TV. "Well I hope you feel better than you look" he said with a smile. Flynn managed a small smile back. "Do you want some breakfast?"

Flynn pulled a face. "No thanks. Just a cup of tea and some paracetamol. My head's banging." Matt nodded and got up to go to the kitchen. Flynn dropped down onto the sofa and sighed. Matt handed him two tablets and a glass of water before returning to the kitchen to make some tea.

"Did you sleep ok or is that a silly question?" he asked as he returned with the hot drinks.

"A bit, not much." Flynn looked at his mobile, which was still switched off, lying where he'd left it the night before.

"Are you going to phone him?"

He shook his head. "I can't. I know I'm going to have to talk to him if we're ever going to sort this out but I don't know what to say to him."

"Just tell him how you feel. Be honest with him. If you both want to, you can get over this you know."

"I still don't get why you're not happier about this. I thought you'd have been pleased that it's all gone wrong."

Matt shook his head. "I told you last night, maybe at one time but not now. I want you to be happy and he's the one that does that. Anyone else would only be second best wouldn't they?"

Flynn nodded his head. "Yeah, they would. That's why I said I'd marry him. I don't want anyone else, I don't want to be without him but it's not that easy" he sighed as he rubbed his head.

"I know" Matt said.

Flynn sipped his tea and turned his attention to the TV, glad of the distraction. When he'd finished, he had a quick wash, swilled his mouth out with mouthwash and walked back into the living room to grab his phone. Matt was in the kitchen so he walked in to say goodbye.

"Thanks for letting me stay last night."

"No worries. Do you want a lift? I've got to go out in a few minutes anyway."

"No, I need the walk to clear my head. It'll give me time to try to figure out what I'm going to say to him."

"Ok, if you're sure."

"Yeah, I am, thanks again."

"Good luck, I hope you can sort it out."

"Me too." Flynn smiled and walked out into a cold bright winter's morning. He snuggled down into his coat and began the long walk towards home. He kept his eyes down, trying to gather his thoughts, still undecided as to what he should do. He glanced up to see if the road was clear before stepping out to cross it but he didn't check carefully enough because the next thing he knew was him being thrown up into the air as brakes squealed, then blackness washed over him.


	58. Chapter 58

Aaron stepped out of the shower, grabbed a towel and tied it round his waist. He hadn't wanted a shower, he hadn't wanted to move away from his phone just in case Flynn called but Adam had virtually pushed him up the stairs and into the bathroom telling him he'd feel better afterwards and, although he hated to admit it, he'd been right. As he wiped the condensation off the mirror, he looked at his reflection and sighed. He may have been feeling a bit better but you'd never know it from the pale sad looking face that was staring back at him, a face that he knew wouldn't change unless he sorted things out with Flynn. He walked into their bedroom, pulled some clothes out of the drawers and threw them on before hurrying downstairs again. Adam looked at him and smiled. "That's better" he said nodding his head. Aaron smiled a small smile at him as he sat down next to where he'd left his mobile. He picked it up and checked it but still there was nothing from Flynn. "Don't worry, he'll be back today. You'll hear his key in that door before you know it."

"I hope you're right" Aaron said with a sigh. Adam squeezed his shoulder as he walked past him into the kitchen. After speaking briefly to Maddie, he returned with two mugs of tea and some chocolate biscuits which they ate while watching a film that was on TV. The sound of Aaron's mobile ringing made both of them jump. Aaron grabbed it and said hello, listening for a few seconds before saying yeah this is him. It obviously wasn't Flynn then Adam thought as he wondered who was on the other end of the phone. "Ok, I'll be right there" he heard Aaron say before he ended the call. "You'll be right where?" he asked. He got no answer. "Aaron" he said a bit louder "You'll be right where?

"Erm, hospital. Flynn's been in an accident. He's been hit by a car."

Adam looked at him in disbelief. "What, when did that happen? Did they say how he is?"

"No, they just said he'd been hit by a car this morning and could I get there as soon as possible. This is my fault, I caused this."

"No, no I'm not having that. This isn't your fault unless you were the one driving the car that was involved."

"Look, I know you're trying to make me feel better but if I hadn't have done what I did, we wouldn't have argued last night and he wouldn't have stormed out. We'd have been here together, he'd have been safe."

"Or he might have popped out for a pint of milk and the same thing could have happened. Listen to me. I'm not having you blame yourself for this. You blamed yourself for what happened to Jackson when it wasn't your fault, I'm not letting you do it again."

"Yeah, but I eventually accepted that that wasn't my fault. This is different, this is."

"No it isn't Aaron, the clue's in the word the hospital used, accident." Adam raised his voice slightly, unable to contain his frustration any longer. "You can't go around thinking anything different. Knowing Flynn, he won't blame you and you shouldn't blame yourself either so get that thought out of your head right now. Now, where's your car keys? We better get going." Without saying anything, Aaron fetched them and handed them to Adam, closing the door behind them as they left for the hospital.

The journey took twenty minutes but it felt like an eternity to Aaron. Even the few seconds it took for the traffic lights to change were a few seconds too long. He just wanted to get there, to find out hopefully that Flynn was alright. After they'd parked the car, he ran into the Accident and Emergency department with Adam following close behind. He approached the desk and asked about Flynn. The nurse checked and told them he was still being assessed then showed them to a small waiting area. Adam sat down but Aaron couldn't. He paced up and down in silence lost in his thoughts, lots of questions all starting with "what if" swirling round his head, all with consequences he didn't want to think about. They'd been there for about fifteen minutes before he spoke again. "How much longer are we going to have to wait?" he said loudly knowing the nurse would hear him "They must know something by now. I'm really not in the mood for playing I know something you don't know." She looked over at them but said nothing. Adam smiled at her apologetically before turning his attention back to Aaron. "Will you keep it down? They'll tell us what's going on as soon as they can. Come and sit down and I'll get us something to drink."

"I don't want something to drink. I want to know how my boyfriend is only nobody seems to be able to tell me." He glared at the nurse again but she just ignored him. She'd been on the receiving end of far worse than a dirty look from people waiting for news about loved ones. It was water off a duck's back to her now.

"Try and calm down mate. Getting yourself all worked up isn't going to help anyone."

"I know and I will calm down as soon as I know how he is." He carried on pacing as time ticked slowly by. When Adam next checked his watch, he was surprised to find they'd been there over an hour. "I can't take much more of this" Aaron said as he finally sat down, putting his head in his hands and beginning to cry. "Yeah well maybe he's got some news for us" Adam said as he watched a doctor speak to the nurse and then walk towards them. "Mr Livesy?" he asked. Aaron jumped up and looked at him with tear stained eyes. "Yeah that's me. How is he? Please tell me he's still alive." The doctor smiled at him. "Flynn's very much still alive, I'm pleased to say, and considering what he's been through, his injuries are relatively minor." He looked down at the paperwork in his hands before carrying on. "He's got a lot of cuts and bruises, some badly bruised ribs, a couple of broken fingers and a broken wrist but our tests show all his internal organs are undamaged. The car that hit him obviously wasn't out of control or speeding or his injuries would have been a lot worse." Adam grinned while Aaron tilted his head back and, looking at the ceiling breathed a sigh of relief but the doctor wasn't finished. "Now, according to the eye witnesses and the ambulance crew, he lost consciousness a couple of times so, as a precaution, I've arranged a scan for later today just to make sure there's nothing going on that we need to worry about."

"But he seems ok, yeah?" Aaron asked.

The doctor nodded. "He's been able to tell us what happened, he doesn't appear to be having any problems with his memory so I'm hopeful the scan won't show anything but I'd rather be safe than sorry. We'll keep him in for observation and, providing the scan comes back clear, he should be able to go home in a day or two."

Aaron nodded. "Can I see him?"

"Of course, if you'd like to follow me" he said walking off down the corridor. The three of them stopped outside a room and the doctor turned to them. "Someone will be back to take him for his scan later." Aaron just nodded and watched as he walked away. "Well go on then, what are you waiting for?" Adam asked.

"I'm scared. I almost wish he was having problems with his memory, then he wouldn't remember what a mess I've made of things would he? What if he says something I don't want to hear?"

"And what if he says something you do? Go on, in you go. I'll wait here." Aaron took a deep breath, steeled himself and pushed the door open.

Flynn turned his head towards the opening door and watched as Aaron made his way over to the chair beside the bed, the expression on his face hard for Aaron to read among all the cuts and bruises. "Alright, how are you feeling?" Aaron asked as he sat down.

"Like I've been hit by a car."

"The doctor says you're going to be fine. You'll only have to be in for a little while, then you can come home."

"If only it was that simple." Flynn's tone surprised Aaron so he decided to try a different approach.

"You know that cast looks way too new. It's just begging for some signatures. Can I be the first to sign it?"

"Course, if we were both twelve." Flynn shut his eyes and pulled a face as he shifted position slightly, trying to get more comfortable. He opened his eyes again to see Aaron with his head down looking as sorrowful as one of those abandoned puppies that you see in charity adverts and, although he hated to see him looking like that, he was in too much pain to be forgiving. "Look, I'm sorry but what did you expect? That everything would suddenly be alright between us because I've been hit by a car? I may have had a bang on the head but unfortunately, it hasn't made me forget what you did." Aaron looked up and fixed his eyes on Flynn's. "So that's it is it? You've made up your mind that we're finished without us even having a chance to talk."

Flynn looked at Aaron with a confused expression on his face. "I never said that."

"You didn't have to. Actions speak louder than words and you're not wearing your engagement ring. I noticed as soon as I sat down." Flynn looked down at his broken fingers, strapped together for support and shook his head. "I didn't take it off. They had to cut it off because my finger was so swollen. I tried to stop them, told them to get it off some other way but they wouldn't listen." For the first time since his confession the previous night, Aaron felt a glimmer of hope. He tentatively moved his hand to hold Flynn's but he moved it away. "Don't" he said quietly.

"I don't understand. I thought you wanted me here. That's why the hospital phoned isn't it, because you asked them to?"

Flynn nodded his head. "When they asked me who to contact, you were the first person I thought of but now you're here, I don't know what I want anymore."

"Do you hate me?" Aaron asked quietly.

"If I did, this would be a lot easier, believe me. I hate what you did, what you've done to us but I don't hate you. I don't think I could if I tried." Flynn sighed. "Look, my head's banging, I've got a brain scan to go through, can we not talk about this now. In fact, maybe you should just go."

"No, I'm not leaving you, especially when it's my fault you're here."

Flynn shook his head. "It's not your fault Aaron, it's mine. I should have checked the road better before I tried to cross it. I don't blame you so you can stop blaming yourself." Just then Aaron's phone rang. He took it out of his pocket, looked at his mum's name flashing on the screen and pressed to reject the call. Flynn tried to suppress the horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach as Aaron's phone then beeped with a text message which again, he ignored. "Someone's keen to get hold of you" Flynn said.

"Yeah, me mum, I'll speak to her later."

"Your mum, right, is that who it was?" Flynn turned his head away and looked at the wall.

"Yeah, why who do you think it was?"

Flynn just shrugged. "Wait, you don't think that was… Flynn, he hasn't got my number and I haven't got his. Here, check for yourself if you don't believe me." Aaron held his phone out to Flynn who glanced down at it before looking back at him. "See, that's the problem I've now got Aaron. I would never have doubted you before, it would never have crossed my mind not to believe you but now it's different. That trust I had in you has gone and if I can't trust you..." his words trailed off, his sentence remained unfinished.

Aaron shook his head. "But you can trust me. What I did is never going to happen again. It was a mistake, a massive one that I'm not going to repeat."

"But don't you see, the damage has already been done, what's happened has just proved that."

Their conversation was interrupted by the arrival of a couple of policemen. "Sorry to disturb you Mr Buchanan. We need to take a statement about the accident if you're feeling up to it, while it's still fresh in your mind."

"Can't you come back later?" Aaron snapped.

"No it's fine. Let's get it out of the way" Flynn said "Aaron, just go."

Aaron hesitated before standing up. "Fine, but I'm not leaving until I know what the scan says."

The policemen moved out of the way of the door as an upset Aaron barged past them.

Later that day, after being told by the doctor that Flynn's scan was normal, Aaron wanted to try to talk to him again but having been told what had happened between them earlier, Adam persuaded him to let Flynn sleep on it and try again tomorrow. Aaron wasn't happy about it but he allowed Adam to take him home. Adam offered to stay with him again but Aaron told him he just wanted to be on his own. Despite not wanting to leave him, Adam felt like he had no choice but to trust his mate and so he did what Aaron wanted and left him alone. Once he'd gone, Aaron put on the radio and lay on the sofa listening to the music, thinking about what to do next. The house felt empty, he felt empty and the song that was playing wasn't helping to improve his mood at all. It was a slow song, the mournful voice of the singer pleading for the person they loved to give them a chance to prove they were worthy of their love, that they were the only one they thought about, the only one they wanted to be with. Aaron wiped away a tear, the words too close to home as they summed up perfectly what he wanted. "Bloody Adele" he grumbled as he switched the radio off "would it be too much to ask for you to sing something that doesn't make people cry?" He lay there for a few more minutes, until he couldn't stand the silence any longer. He grabbed a jacket and went for a walk. He didn't know or care where he was going, he just had to get out of the house. After walking for a good hour, he was chilled to the bone so he headed home where he spent the evening drowning his sorrows.

At the hospital, Flynn ended the call he'd just made to his brother feeling a bit guilty. He'd told him about the accident but when Harrison had said he'd come straight to the hospital, he'd lied to him and told him that Aaron was with him so to leave it until tomorrow. Harrison had offered to tell their parents so Flynn wouldn't have to go through it all again, something he was extremely grateful for. It meant he now had time to concentrate on more important things, like him and Aaron and what he was going to do. He leaned over and opened the drawer of the bedside locker, taking out the two halves of his engagement ring, holding them like they were the most precious things in the world. He'd really thought that once he saw Aaron again, everything would fall into place but the incident with the phone had showed him just how much trouble their relationship was in. He'd wanted to believe him but the doubt was just too strong to ignore. If that was how things were going to be from now on, maybe it was better to just end it now. On the other hand, leaving Aaron would break his heart because he loved him so much, always had done and that hadn't changed even now. Closing his eyes, he lay as comfortably as he could, knowing he wouldn't get much sleep, that he had a lot of thinking to do.

The next morning, after a restless night, Aaron woke up and went downstairs to get some tablets for his sore head. He'd decided to go back to the hospital to see Flynn even though he knew he could live to regret it. Hearing him say yesterday that he didn't hate him and how he'd cared enough about his engagement ring to try to get them not to cut it off had given him renewed hope that, if they could just talk honestly to each other there was a chance they could sort things out. He forced down some toast and a cup of tea before showering and getting dressed. Visiting time was ages away so to keep himself occupied, he cleaned the house from top to bottom and washed both cars too. Later that afternoon, he approached the main entrance of the hospital with a mixture of fear and nervousness. His stomach was in knots as he made his way to Flynn's room and pushed the door open.

Flynn's heart skipped a beat when he saw Aaron's face. He couldn't help himself, he was so gorgeous and when he smiled shyly at him as he sat down on the chair by the side of the bed, the decision he'd made last night about their relationship was instantly thrown into doubt.

"I know you told me to go yesterday but..."

"You decided to come back anyway."

"You know me, I don't always do what I'm told. So, is it safe to ask how you're feeling or am I just going to get another smart reply?"

Flynn couldn't help but smile. "It's safe. Apart from my ribs which are killing me, I'm ok. I feel better than I look."

"Good because you look terrible" Aaron said with a nervous laugh.

"Thanks. You do know you're supposed to make the person you visit feel better don't you not worse?"

"Sorry. I could get you a hot chocolate if you want. That usually does the trick."

Flynn nodded. "That'd be good." Aaron beamed at him as he left, promising not to be too long. Flynn lay back, his mind racing. Last night, he'd been sure the decision he'd made was the right one even though it wasn't what he wanted but now, he wasn't so sure. When Aaron returned, he handed Flynn one of the drinks he was carrying and sat down holding the other one. They sat in a bit of an awkward silence, neither really knowing what to say next. Aaron took a sip of his drink before putting the cup down on the bedside locker. "Look, I know yesterday you said you didn't want to talk about what's happened but I need to say something to you if you'll listen." Aaron watched as Flynn fixed his eyes on him and waited for him to speak. "I'm so sorry for doing what I did, more sorry than you'll ever know. That look on your face when I told you, it's in my head all the time. I'll never be able to forget it and I don't ever want to see you look like that again." As Aaron paused, Flynn thought back to what Matt had said to him that night it had all kicked off. He'd said that Aaron would always remember the look on his face and it looked like he was right. Maybe he was right about some of the other stuff he'd said too. "I get that you're angry and hurt" Aaron continued "and I don't blame you but I don't want to lose you. If I do, there'll be a massive hole in my life that nobody else will be able to fill and I don't care how soppy that sounds because it's true." Flynn could feel himself welling up and coughed to clear the lump in his throat. "I don't want us to split up Aaron, I really don't but trust is so important and you've shattered mine."

"I know and I know it's going to be difficult to get it back but please, can't we just talk, try to sort things out?" Flynn looked into Aaron's eyes, clear and blue and slightly watery and he knew that there was only one answer he could give. He nodded his head.

"Alright. When I get out of here, we'll have a proper talk but I'm not promising anything and you have to be completely honest with me, no matter how difficult it gets."

"I will I promise. I have been so far haven't I despite what it's done so I'm not going to stop now." Flynn knew this was true so he said nothing, just sipped his hot chocolate and winced as the liquid passed over his swollen lip. Just then, the doctor came in and with a broad smile asked Flynn how he was feeling. "Better than I was yesterday" he answered honestly. "Good. I'd just like to check your ribs again and have another look at that cut on your head. Sorry, I won't be long" he said looking at Aaron. Aaron stood up to leave and was surprised when he heard Flynn say "No, Aaron stay, if you want to. That's ok isn't it?" he asked the doctor.

"As long as you don't mind." The doctor started with a cut on Flynn's head and Aaron grimaced as he saw for the first time Flynn's cut and bruised body. The area around his ribs was particularly bad, a purplish black mess dotted with red. Flynn winced as the doctor gently pressed the skin before moving on to check the other less serious cuts and bruises. "Well, I've got some good news for you. I'm happy to let you go home providing you take things easy."

"Home? When?" Flynn asked.

"Later today. There's nothing more we can do for you here, it's just a matter of waiting for everything to heal but I'd like you to see your GP some time this week. I'll give you a letter to give them and they can take over your care from now on.

"Thank you" Flynn said quietly. "You're welcome" the doctor said leaving them alone again.

"Are you ok? You don't seem very happy about being able to leave" Aaron asked.

"No I am, course I am it's just…"

"I know, looks like we'll be having that chat sooner rather than later." They both fell silent as they realised how much was riding on this impending conversation. Aaron had another question to ask which he was also anxious about the answer to. "Are you coming back home or will you be going somewhere else?" Flynn thought for a second before saying "I'm coming home provided you bring me in some clothes. Can't go home in this can I?"

"No, it's not a good look. Right, I'll be back in a little while."

He drove home with a mixture of emotions running through him. He was pleased Flynn wanted to come home but anxious and nervous that it would only be temporary and that, after their talk whenever that might be, he would leave again, this time for good and that was something that he knew he wouldn't be able to handle. He tried to push that thought out of his mind as he went upstairs and put some things in a bag for Flynn. He was just leaving when his mobile rang. He saw his mum's name on the screen and realised that he hadn't returned her call or text from yesterday. He decided he'd better answer it or she'd never leave him alone. About half an hour later when he was finally able to get a word in, he told her briefly about Flynn's accident and said he had to get back to the hospital to pick him up. After making him promise to give Flynn her love and best wishes, Chas finally let him go and he drove back to the hospital. He put the bag on the floor next to the bed and asked if the doctor had been back with the letter.

"Yeah, about ten minutes after you left. I've had my orders about taking it easy so I just need my clothes and then we can go." Aaron picked the bag up and put it on the bottom of Flynn's bed. He opened it and started handing him the clothes. "Hang on a minute, what are these doing here?" he heard Flynn say. He turned to see him with a smile on his face holding a pair of jogging bottoms in his hand. "I thought you were bringing me my clothes not yours." Aaron smiled back at him. "I know they're not your favourite item of clothing but have you tried to put a pair of jeans on using only one hand, trying to do up the zip and the button, not to mention the belt?" Flynn actually hadn't thought about it. He hadn't thought about the practicalities of having a broken wrist and broken fingers at all. "See you hadn't thought about that had you which is why it's a good job I did. At least with them being elasticated at the waist, you should be able to get them on and off ok if you wriggle a bit. I can't do anything to make putting socks on any easier though unless you don't wear any with your trainers or I could help you if you want me to." Flynn's heart melted just a little bit more. With what had happened over the past few days, he'd forgotten this side of Aaron. The thoughtful and considerate side that he'd seen an awful lot of in the years they'd been together. Could he really walk away from him and everything they had? The more he thought about it, the less likely it was becoming. With some difficulty, Flynn managed to get dressed accepting Aaron's help with putting his socks on and tying his laces. Gingerly, he stood up and opened the drawer of the bedside locker. He took out the two halves of his engagement ring and put them in his pocket.

"Ready then?" Aaron asked.

Flynn smiled at him. "Yeah, let's get home."


	59. Chapter 59

**I'm sorry for the delay in posting this next chapter. It's a bit shorter than usual too but not by much.**

**Disclaimer - I don't own any of the characters in this story. They belong to Emmerdale.**

* * *

><p>Aaron put his key in the front door, unlocked it and stepped to one side to allow Flynn to go into the house first. The journey from the hospital hadn't been too bad all things considered although both of them had been distracted by thoughts of the difficult conversation they would soon be having. As Flynn walked into the living room, Aaron closed the front door and locked it again, shutting out the world. Normally, there was nowhere else he'd rather be than at home with Flynn but right now he didn't feel that way. He just felt worried about what might happen, worried that his best efforts wouldn't be good enough to stop the most important person in the world to him leaving him for good. He put Flynn's bag on the floor in the hall and followed him into the living room. "Have we got a cleaner now?" Flynn asked as he eased himself down onto the sofa "This place is spotless."<p>

"I wish. I did it this morning. I needed something to do to take my mind off things." Aaron walked over towards Flynn, his stomach starting to churn. "Are you hungry?" he asked knowing that he didn't have an appetite himself but wanting to put off the inevitable for as long as possible "I could get you something to eat."

Flynn shook his head. "No thanks, I'm alright. You have something though if you want."

"No, I'm not hungry either."

"I wouldn't mind a drink though."

"Beer?"

"Best not. They gave me some painkillers earlier. Tea will be fine."

Flynn smiled a small smile at Aaron who smiled back at him before heading into the kitchen. Once Aaron was out of sight, Flynn's smile disappeared and his face grew serious. In a little while, depending on what he decided, he would either still be with Aaron and they would be starting to piece their relationship back together or he would be single and mourning the loss of the man he was going to marry. It was a massive decision and he still wasn't completely sure what he was going to do. In the kitchen, Aaron tried to remain calm as he set about making the drinks. This was the chance he'd asked for, the opportunity for him and Flynn to talk and he had no idea what he was going to say or, for that matter, what Flynn was going to say to him. As he poured the hot water into the mugs he just hoped that when the time came, he would somehow find the words that he needed to convince Flynn not to walk away from him. He stirred the tea, dropped the used spoon in the sink, picked up the mugs and carried them into the living room, handing one to Flynn before sitting down next to him on the sofa. They sat for a few seconds in silence drinking their tea. There was a nervous air around them, neither of them sure how to start the conversation. "For two people who wanted to talk to each other, we're not doing very well are we?" Aaron eventually said breaking the silence, his nerves unable to stand it any longer. Flynn turned to look at him, finding Aaron's gorgeous blue eyes fixed firmly on him. "No we're not" he said quietly. "I never thought we'd ever find it difficult to talk to each other. Mind you I never thought you'd cheat on me either so shows you what I know." Aaron cast his eyes downward, unable to maintain eye contact and began to fiddle with a loose bit of thread on the bottom of his t shirt. Flynn leaned over to put his mug on the floor by the side of the sofa, wincing as he sat up straight again. "I thought it hurt when Matt cheated on me but, compared to how I feel now, that was nothing. What he did was bad but what you did was worse."

"What?" Aaron looked up with a confused look on his face. "Hang on a minute. He had sex with someone behind your back and never told you about it until you confronted him one day. I never had sex with Tariq and I told you straight away what I'd done because I felt so bad about it yet according to you what I did was worse. How can that be?"

"Because Matt hadn't asked me to marry him, he hadn't told me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. We weren't living together, do I need to carry on?" Aaron shook his head, angry with himself that he hadn't thought about it in that way. "How could you do it Aaron? I knew things weren't right before you went away but I never thought they were that bad that you'd sleep with someone else."

"They weren't that bad."

"Right. So I was imagining the moodiness, the way you were having a go at everyone, the fact that we weren't having sex as often as we used to was I?" Flynn could feel some of the initial anger he'd felt when Aaron had first told him starting to return.

"No, you weren't imagining it but how I was behaving had nothing to do with what I did. The two things aren't connected."

Now it was Flynn's turn to look confused. "But they must be."

"No they're not. It was to do with something completely different but it doesn't matter at the moment."

"Yes it does. If there's something else going on, I want to know what it is."

Aaron sighed. "It'll keep 'til another time, sorting me and you out is more important."

"There won't be a me and you to sort out if you don't tell me what you're talking about right now." Flynn's face was serious as he stared at Aaron. He wasn't often forceful like this so whenever he was, it had more of an effect. Aaron could tell he wasn't in the mood to be fobbed off so he leant forward and put his mug on the coffee table. "Alright, I'll tell you but it had nothing to do with you or us as a couple." He paused before carrying on. "I haven't been sleeping well for weeks now. At first, I thought it was just a phase I was going through and that it would settle down again but it didn't. It's so bad that if I'm getting three or four hours sleep a night I'm lucky. Anyway, while I was away, I realised that it wasn't that I couldn't sleep, it was that I was stopping myself from going to sleep."

"Stopping yourself as in making yourself stay awake? Why were you doing that?"

Aaron took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. "Because I was scared I'd go to sleep one night and not wake up again. You know, like what happened to Dan."

Flynn couldn't take his eyes off Aaron as he struggled to comprehend what he was being told. "I've got this abnormal fear of dying" Aaron continued. "I know it sounds mad but I did some research and I found out it's a proper medical condition." He took his phone out of his pocket and found the information that he'd looked at before. "Here, see for yourself. I need the loo, I'll be back in a minute." He handed his phone to Flynn who took it and began to read the information on the screen. He read it twice to make sure he understood it properly. He was shocked, he couldn't believe that they shared a bed every night and he had no idea that Aaron was suffering so badly. He'd just assumed that once the initial shock of what had happened to Dan had worn off that Aaron's sleeping pattern had returned to normal like his had but that obviously wasn't the case. He returned the phone to its home screen and was just going to put it back on the table when he had a thought. It would only take him a few seconds to go through the phone and see if Aaron had been telling him the truth the other day about who had called and texted him. He knew it was wrong, he also knew he wouldn't get a better opportunity to put his mind at rest once and for all and the best bit was that Aaron would never know that he'd done it. With his heart pounding and feeling a mixture of nerves and guilt, he went to Aaron's call log and scanned the list. Sure enough, Chas's name and number were there, just like Aaron had said. Next he went to his texts and there she was again, the message timed at just after the phone call. He'd never felt relief like it as he realised Aaron had been telling him the truth. Just to be absolutely certain though that there was no trace of Tariq anywhere, he went to Aaron's contacts and began going through the names, all of which he recognised. He was so engrossed, he didn't realise that Aaron had re-entered the room until he heard him speak. "You still reading that? And I thought I was a slow reader." Flynn jumped at the sound of his voice and as he looked up at Aaron, he blushed a deep shade of red. Aaron took one look at his face and instantly knew what he'd been doing. "You won't find anything you know" he said as he walked across the room and sat down next to him again.

"I'm sorry, I just needed to see for myself" Flynn said quietly, handing Aaron his phone and waiting for the backlash.

"It's alright, I'm not angry with you although I should be. At least now you know I was telling the truth. That's the important thing. Besides, if I was in your position, I'd probably have done the same thing." Wanting to get back to what they had been talking about, Aaron said "So now you know why I was acting the way I was."

Flynn nodded. "I had no idea that a condition like that even existed never mind that you were suffering from it."

"I know, it surprised me as well. I was just pleased to find out that I wasn't going mad. If I'd have figured it out sooner, I would have told you. I did think about telling you when I spoke to you on the phone the other night but I wanted to tell you face to face. I'm going to get it sorted though. I'm going to make an appointment with the doctor I saw when I had the lump. I mean, after what happened last time I saw her, talking to her about this should be a piece of cake." Flynn couldn't help but smile. He could feel himself starting to relax a bit. At least some of Aaron's behaviour now made sense. "It said that counselling and maybe medication is the best way to treat it. Are you alright with that?"

Aaron nodded his head. "I'll do whatever it takes to get it sorted just like I'll do whatever it takes to get us sorted too."

Flynn shifted position so that he could face Aaron. "I don't get it then. If you left here to go on the course feeling that things were ok between us, then why did you cheat on me?"

Aaron let out a deep breath. "I know you're going to find this difficult to hear but you did say I had to be honest with you so I will be. There was just something about him that got to me. There was something there between us right from the moment we met, a spark I suppose you'd call it. I don't know how else to put it but he knew it too. I think that's why he spoke to his boyfriend on the phone in front of me and why I told him straight away that I was engaged to you. It was like we were both letting the other one know that we were off limits, that nothing could happen between us."

"Yeah well it didn't work did it?" Flynn's reply was sharp because Aaron's words, although honest like he'd asked for, hurt to hear. They brought all his sadness back to the surface and he could feel tears starting to form in his eyes.

"No it didn't but we both knew we'd made a mistake. I felt terrible from the minute I woke up and I still do. I'll always regret it."

Flynn wiped away a tear and sniffed. "You know sometimes I see you and him together in my head. I mean obviously I don't know what he looks like, I don't want to know either but I see you with someone that's not me and it kills me."

"I know and if I could take all your hurt away, I would but I can't. All I can do is promise you that I'll never make you feel this bad again." They both fell quiet before Flynn asked the question he'd swore to himself he wouldn't ask. "When you were with him, was it better than it is with me?" Aaron hung his head again and started to play with his engagement ring, twisting it round his finger. How was he supposed to answer that? "Actually, forget I said that. It doesn't matter. It's not important. Besides, if it was better, you're not exactly going to sit there and tell me that it was are you?"

Aaron looked up into Flynn's eyes. "It wasn't better, it was different. Physically, it was alright but in here" he said touching his chest "and in my head, it wasn't alright." He waited for Flynn to stop him but he didn't so he decided to carry on, surprised how easily the words came out. "Something was missing. It felt hollow and empty. I didn't feel connected to him the way I feel connected to you. He didn't make me feel the way that you do. When me and you are together, I feel it everywhere, not just in the obvious place if that makes sense but it wasn't like that with him and it would be the same with anyone else. It'll only ever feel right with you." Flynn could feel his defences crumbling as he looked at Aaron's face. He knew how difficult that would have been for him to talk about and the fact that he was prepared to do it to prove how much he meant to him really moved him. "I wish you could have figured all that out without putting it to the test with somebody first"

"So do I believe me. I didn't go looking for someone else Flynn, I've got no need to, it really did just happen but it'll never happen again."

"Until next time you meet someone and there's a spark between the two of you."

"There won't be a next time." Aaron stared right into Flynn's eyes, he didn't even blink. "I just want you."

Flynn looked away and sat staring into the distance. Aaron had poured his heart out to him, answered all his questions honestly and he did believe what he'd told him about it being a mistake that wouldn't be repeated. Unfortunately, despite knowing that, it wasn't going to make everything instantly alright between them or make the pain that he was feeling at being cheated on disappear. The last four words Aaron had spoken, however, they were the words that had finally broken him and made his mind up for him as to what he was going to do.

"What are you thinking?" Aaron asked, his voice soft.

"I was just thinking about what you've said tonight. About whether I could walk away from you, from all of this just because you were an idiot and did something you shouldn't have." Aaron's heart was pounding in his chest as he asked "and can you?"

Flynn shook his head. "No I can't because, despite what you did, I don't want to be with anyone else. I believe you when you say it won't happen again but just because I believe you, that doesn't mean that me and you can go straight back to how we were before. That'll take some time, you have to understand that."

"I do. I know it can't be fixed overnight. I know it'll take time. I'm just so glad we're staying together. You won't regret this I promise."

As relief flooded through him, Aaron threw his arms around Flynn and held him, enjoying the feeling of having Flynn in his arms again and the feeling of Flynn's arms around him. He wanted so badly to kiss him as well as hold him but after what Flynn had just said, he knew he couldn't. Everything that happened between them from now on would have to be at Flynn's pace and he would just have to live with it. That was the price he was going to have to pay for what he'd done and compared to the price he could have paid, he knew he was getting off lightly but that didn't make it any easier. He squeezed Flynn tighter, not wanting to let him go, completely forgetting about his damaged ribs until he heard him cry out and pull away from him. "Oh god I'm so sorry, I completely forgot about your ribs. Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'll be alright" Flynn said, the pained expression on his face showing how much Aaron had unintentionally hurt him. "Harrison hurt his ribs years ago and he was always going on about how painful it was. I thought he was exaggerating to get some attention but he wasn't."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"Not squeeze me so tightly next time."

"I'll try to remember. Do you want another drink?"

"Yeah go on then, I'll have a coffee this time."

Aaron's stomach began gurgling as he stood up and walked towards the kitchen.

"Sounds like someone needs to eat something" Flynn said smiling at him. Aaron stopped in the doorway between the kitchen and the living room and turned to face him.

"Yeah, I am a bit peckish actually. Do you want something to eat now?"

"I don't fancy a big dinner, no. Tell you what I would like though, some cheese on toast."

Aaron pulled a face. "With Marmite spread all over it I suppose."

"Of course."

"I don't know how you can eat that stuff. It's so salty and urgh, it's just vile."

"Just because you don't like it doesn't mean it's vile. Besides, I don't moan when you eat baked beans do I even though I can't stand them?"

"No, you don't moan, you just won't let me kiss you after I've eaten them unless I've cleaned my teeth first. Still, I don't suppose that'll be a problem for a while will it?" Aaron couldn't hide his sadness at having Flynn so close yet so far away at the same time.

Flynn stood up and walked over to Aaron, taking one of his hands in his. "Hey look, I know this is difficult especially with us living together but what you have to remember is that what happened only happened a few days ago. It's still really raw and although I want to forget about it and move on, until I have, this is how it's got to be." Aaron nodded his understanding. "Now, I've got to go to the loo which could take a while so it might be a good idea to get yourself something to eat first." He kissed Aaron softly on the cheek before heading upstairs. Aaron decided to wait until Flynn came back so they could eat together so he put the TV on and began flicking through the channels. When Flynn returned, Aaron went into the kitchen and prepared the food and the drinks for them. After they'd eaten, they settled down to watch some TV but Flynn was really struggling. His ribs were hurting as were his wrist and fingers. Aaron couldn't fail to notice his discomfort. "Are you alright?" he asked.

Flynn grimaced. "I think the painkillers might be wearing off."

"Have you got any more?"

"No. The hospital only gave me the two to take while I was there. They said my doctor could prescribe some more when I go to see them with the letter. I'll have to go tomorrow."

"Well there's some co-codamol in the bathroom cabinet. Do you want a couple of those?"

Flynn nodded his head. Aaron fetched the tablets and a glass of water, holding the glass until Flynn put the tablets in his mouth before handing it to him. After swallowing the tablets, Flynn put the glass on the table and stood up.

"I'm going to go up to bed. I can't seem to get comfortable down here."

"Alright."

"Erm, while everything's this painful, I think I better sleep in the spare room. You know how much you can fidget during the night. Your elbows can be lethal." He waited to see if Aaron was going to say anything but he kept quiet. "Right, I'll see you in the morning then."

"Yeah, see you in the morning. Just shout if you need anything." As Flynn left the room, Aaron muttered under his breath "it's not like I'll be getting much sleep myself."


	60. Chapter 60

When Flynn woke up the following morning, he woke to a completely silent house. He glanced at the clock and was shocked to see it was almost half past nine. He couldn't believe he'd slept in so late. He must have needed it though he reasoned as he rolled onto his back glancing at the empty space in the bed next to him. Normally on a work day, when he and Aaron woke up, they would spend a few minutes just cuddling, enjoying a few extra minutes of closeness before getting up to start their day. It was part of their routine, even if they were running a bit late they still did it but today, he'd be starting his day without his boyfriend's arms around him. His choice he knew but he still missed it. He sighed as he got out of bed and made his way downstairs. On the table he saw a folded piece of paper with his name written on it. He picked it up and read the handwritten note. "Sorry I didn't get a chance to see you before going to work. I looked in on you but you were fast asleep and I didn't want to disturb you. See you later, Aaron x." Flynn smiled to himself as he put the note back on the table. The first thing he did was to phone his boss to tell him about the accident and that he wouldn't be in for the rest of the week. His boss was obviously shocked but relieved to hear that he wasn't more seriously injured and told him not to worry about work, just to look after himself and keep him informed about his recovery. Flynn said he'd do that and that he would speak to him at the end of the week to let him know how he was doing. He then made himself a cup of tea and ate a bowl of cereal before getting himself showered and dressed. Everything took so much longer to do than usual and he found it quite frustrating but eventually he managed to do what he had to do. He made his way back down the stairs again and took the note that the hospital doctor had given him. He put it in his pocket and left to go to the local surgery. As he couldn't drive, he took a slow walk enjoying being out in the fresh air. When he got there, he spoke to the receptionist, explaining what had happened to him before handing over the letter. She told him to take a seat while she had a word with one of the doctors. A couple of minutes later, she came back and said as long as he didn't mind waiting, he would be seen as soon as they could fit him in. Flynn couldn't help but smile when about twenty minutes later he heard his name being called out and looked up to find the young good looking doctor that he and Aaron had joked about Aaron having to see looking around the waiting room. In the privacy of the doctor's own room, he examined Flynn and asked how he was coping with the pain. Flynn explained how bad it had been the previous night so he gave him a prescription for some painkillers but advised him only to use them if he absolutely had to as they were quite strong and could cause some unpleasant side effects. Flynn thanked him and took the prescription into the chemist next door and after being given the same warning by the pharmacist that the doctor had just given him, he made his way back home again.

In the village, Aaron was at the garage, working on a car. When he'd first got there that morning, he and Cain had had a chat about the course and, having been told about the accident by Chas, how Flynn was doing and what had happened to him. Aaron answered his questions and told him that the course had been useful and worth going on. When Cain asked him if being away for a few days had helped to sort his head out, he'd simply said yes. Since then, Cain had been in the office doing some paperwork and he had been left to his own devices which suited him fine. He heard footsteps approaching and saw Adam walking towards him. "Alright mate" he said leaning against the car Aaron was working on, crossing one leg over the other and folding his arms. Aaron stopped working and leant against the car next to Adam.

"Yeah I'm fine. Listen, Cain's in there so keep your voice down ok. He doesn't know about me and Flynn, no one does and I want it to stay that way."

Adam nodded. "They won't hear anything from me I promise. So how's he doing? Is he still in hospital?"

"No, they let him out yesterday. He's still in a lot of pain but at least he's back home."

"Back home as in your place?" Adam asked. Aaron nodded. "So, did you manage to have a chat and sort things out?"

"Yeah we did. Wasn't the easiest chat in the world to have but we're staying together."

"Oh mate that's brilliant."

"I know but he said it'll be a while before things go back to how they were before."

"Well, you can't really blame him for that can you? At least he didn't walk away."

Aaron sighed. "True and I don't blame him but it's really difficult. He's with me but he's not with me if you know what I mean. He's keeping his distance at the moment and he's sleeping in the spare room. He said it's because his ribs are so painful…"

"But you don't believe him."

"Yeah I do but at the same time, I don't. I know they're really hurting him at the moment but I'm pretty sure if I hadn't done what I did, he'd at least have tried sleeping in the same bed as me to see if it was ok before taking himself off to the spare room."

Adam looked at his best mate, at the sad face looking back at him and decided to think before opening his mouth, not wanting to say anything that might upset him any further. "Maybe he would have done, maybe he wouldn't but you'll never know for definite so why torture yourself about it. Look, I know it's not easy. It's bound to be weird for a while but it'll settle down again. You'll see, I'll be moaning at you two again for not being able to leave each other alone before you know it."

Aaron smiled. "You reckon?"

"Yeah absolutely. I mean who could resist you eh?" He nudged his shoulder gently against Aaron's. "You've got to focus on the positives. You could have split up but you didn't. He decided he still wants to be with you. You're still a couple, still living together, you've just got to be patient and wait for everything else to fall into place."

Aaron nodded, knowing that what Adam had said was true. "Cheers mate" he said hugging him tightly "for everything. I don't know what I'd have done without you."

"Any time lad. That's what best mates are for. Now you better get back to work before Cain starts having a go at you for slacking."

"Wise words, them." Cain came out of the garage and walked across towards the two of them. "I need you to leave this one and get started on that black one over there. Let's see if that money I spent on that course was money well spent." Aaron raised his eyebrows but said nothing. He took the job sheet from Cain and walked off.

"Is he alright?" he asked Adam.

"Yeah, he will be."

Settled comfortably back indoors again, Flynn checked his watch while he was sitting watching a film on TV. It was lunchtime so he started thinking about what he could have to eat that he could make one handed. He was surprised when he heard the front door open and close and saw Aaron coming in. "Alright. What are you doing home?" he asked smiling at him.

"Cain sent me on a couple of errands so I thought while I was in town I might as well have my lunch here. Do you want anything or have you already eaten?"

"No, I was just going to get something."

"I'll sort it out then" Aaron said smiling at him as he walked into the kitchen.

"I got your note" Flynn called through to him "you could have woken me up you know, I wouldn't have minded."

"Nah, you looked too peaceful. Besides, I figured you needed the sleep. Oh and I phoned the surgery and made that appointment with the doctor. Only thing is, it's not classed as an emergency so I can't see her for a couple of weeks but at least it's booked."

"Wow, you don't hang around do you?"

"Not when it's important, no. I told you I'd get it sorted and I meant it." Aaron came through a few minutes later with their lunch and a couple of mugs of tea and put them on the table. "So how are you feeling? You look a bit better."

"Yeah, I'm not too bad. I think the fresh air helped. I took a walk down to the doctors and handed in that letter from the hospital. They got a doctor to see me and he gave me some painkillers but he said they're only for emergencies really because they're so strong."

Aaron took a bite of his sandwich and sat back on the sofa. "Mum must have told Cain about your accident cos he asked me about it as soon as I got to work. He said to tell you he hopes you get better soon."

"Did he? That was nice of him."

"Well, they weren't his exact words but that's what he meant." They both smiled at each other. "He did give me a bit of stick for not knowing where the accident happened though, something about only having half a story. I told him I was just so relieved that you were ok that it never crossed my mind to ask but, just in case anyone else asks me, where did it happen?"

Flynn began to feel a bit uneasy. Although he hadn't done anything wrong that night, he had a feeling Aaron wouldn't be impressed with what he was about to tell him. "It was on Gainsborough Avenue. I was on my way back here to talk to you when it happened."

Aaron scrunched his face up as he thought. "Gainsborough Avenue? What were you doing out there? We don't know anyone who lives out that way." Flynn put his mug down and looked at Aaron. Aaron had been honest with him, now it was his turn to do the same. "Yeah we do. It's not far from Matt's place." Aaron stared at him. "Matt" he repeated shocked.

Flynn nodded. "After I left here that night, I went to the Old Ship. I wanted a pub that you wouldn't think of looking in if you decided to try and find me. Anyway, Matt came in with some of his mates. I was drinking on my own, I'd had a few at this point so he came over and asked if I was ok. He said it didn't take a genius to figure out me and you had had some sort of falling out and he offered to take me back here but I told him I didn't want to be brought back here. He said he'd drop me off wherever I wanted to go but I didn't want to go anywhere so he said I could sleep it off at his place."

"And you just went." Aaron was trying his best to stay calm. He was in no position to say anything but it didn't mean he had to like what he was hearing.

"Not at first but he wouldn't take no for an answer."

"No, I bet he wouldn't."

"So what would you have preferred him to do? Just leave me there where anything could have happened?"

Aaron put his head down. "No, I suppose not. Did you tell him what I'd done?"

Flynn nodded.

"I bet he loved that. So come on then, what did he say? You should have listened to me, I told you he wasn't good enough for you, how could he do that to you?"

"He'd have been a hypocrite if he had have done wouldn't he? No, he never said anything like that. In fact, he never slagged you off at all."

"So what did he say then?"

"He just told me not to make any decisions while I was drunk and angry, tried to get me to see that things aren't always as simple as you think they should be and that I should come back here and talk things through with you before doing anything I might regret."

"Really?" Aaron was shocked.

"Yeah really. I was surprised too but that's the truth. I haven't told anyone else what happened though, not even my parents or brother and they don't need to know either, not now we're staying together. How about you? Have you told anyone?"

"I only told Adam because, after you'd left, I phoned him and got him to come over. He won't say anything though. Like you said, no one else needs to know."

Flynn nodded his head and carried on eating, changing the conversation to something more general. They finished their lunch and Aaron took the empty mugs and plates back to the kitchen. "Right, I better get back then. I'll see you later" he said. As he walked past Flynn, he placed his hand on Flynn's shoulder and rubbed it gently. Flynn felt a small shiver run through him when Aaron's hand made contact with him. "Yeah, see you later" he said. Although time went quickly for Aaron, the afternoon dragged for Flynn while he waited for him to come back from work. The only positive thing was that it gave him plenty of time to think. It was weird, last night he'd been sure he'd made the right decision in keeping his distance from Aaron, giving himself time to get his head around what had happened and put it behind him but now he was beginning to have doubts. The way he felt this morning when he woke up alone and the way he'd felt from that slightest of touches from Aaron before he went back to work reminded him that, although he was still upset at what he'd done, he really missed being close to him. He began to question whether keeping away from Aaron physically would speed up the healing process for him or not. Maybe he would get over it quicker if things just went back to normal between the two of them. It would show him he'd made the right decision and give Aaron the opportunity to show him that it really was only him that he wanted to be with. As he sat alone in their house, he realised he had a lot more thinking to do.

A few days later, Aaron returned from work to the sound of voices coming from the living room. He recognised them straight away. Flynn's parent's voices were as familiar to him as his own. He really wasn't in the mood for company tonight, not just theirs, anyone's. He and Flynn although getting on pretty well were still quite distant physically and he hated it; hated waking up on his own, hated not being able to do what felt natural to him like cuddle him, kiss him, hated waiting for something to happen between them and feeling disappointed when it didn't. It was hard and coupled with a particularly stressful day at work, he could well do without having to make small talk for the evening. He heard laughter coming through the closed door and decided now was as good a time as any to make his entrance. He was met by three smiling faces as he came in. "Alright" he said as a general greeting to everyone.

"Hi Aaron. How are you?" Flynn's dad asked.

"Alright thanks. So how was your holiday? You look well."

"Oh, it was lovely" Flynn's mum replied "although I still think we should have come back early after what happened."

"Mum, we've been through this I was fine. It was nothing major and there was nothing you could have done anyway. What would have been the point in coming back?"

"He's right" Flynn's dad said "and besides, he had Aaron here to look after him. He was in good hands. I hope you haven't been letting him take advantage of you though?"

If only Aaron thought. "No, course not. Right, I'm just going for a shower. You'll be here when I come back down won't you?"

"Yeah, course we will. We can bore you with our holiday photos and stories just like we've bored Flynn." Aaron smiled and went upstairs. Once he'd gone, Flynn's mum looked at her son. "What's wrong with Aaron? He doesn't seem his usual self."

"He's just really tired. He's been working hard and with the way my ribs have been playing me up, neither of us have been getting much sleep." Flynn didn't like lying to his parents and although there was a grain of truth in what he'd just said, he still felt uncomfortable. He knew what was really bothering Aaron, the same thing that was bothering him, they were missing each other, simple as that and he was the only one who could do something about it.

"Right, tell you what, why don't I cook tea for all of us tonight. You and Aaron can just put your feet up and relax."

"You don't have to do that mum."

"I know but I want to. What would you like? What would Aaron like?"

Flynn smiled. "You know him, he'll eat anything. I don't mind either."

"Right, come on then you" she said standing up and looking at her husband " let's go to the shop. See what we can find."

When Aaron came back downstairs again, he was surprised to find Flynn on his own. "Where've your mum and dad gone?" he asked as he sat down next to him "I was really looking forward to going through their holiday photos as well " he said with a smile.

"Yeah well lucky for you they're coming back then. Mum's decided she wants to cook us our tea tonight so they've gone to the shop. I don't know what we'll be having though, she's going to decide when she gets there."

"As long as it's edible, I don't care what it is."

"I know. I told her you'd eat anything."

"I prefer to think of it that I'm easy to cook for thank you very much" Aaron said. He leant his head back against the sofa, took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Without even thinking about what he was doing, he let his head tip over until it was resting on Flynn's shoulder. Flynn breathed in the freshly showered scent of his boyfriend, felt his damp hair against his skin as he tilted his head so they were leaning against each other. They sat in silence, both enjoying feeling close to each other again. "If I fall asleep, wake me up in about fifteen minutes" Aaron murmured.

"OK but I'd rather you stayed awake."

Aaron opened his eyes and looked at Flynn. "Why's that then? You're not feeling bad are you?"

Flynn looked into Aaron's eyes and his stomach somersaulted. "No, I'm fine. I just can't do this if you're asleep." He leant towards Aaron and placed a soft, tender kiss against Aaron's lips. Aaron felt his heartbeat quicken as he kissed him back, both thoroughly enjoying the feeling of the other one's lips on their own again. When they separated, and Aaron had opened his eyes again, he found Flynn looking at him with a smile on his face. He smiled shyly back. "Well, I guess I can always sleep later" he said quietly as he leaned in to kiss Flynn again. He felt Flynn's arm encased in the cast fall across his stomach as Flynn held him as best he could while their kiss deepened. Aaron gently probed with his tongue, hoping Flynn would allow it to enter his mouth which he did a few seconds before his own tongue found it's way into Aaron's mouth where they gently duelled. Aaron was determined not to make the same mistake he'd made last time and prematurely put a stop to this by hurting Flynn. He'd waited too long for this to happen to do that again so avoiding Flynn's ribs completely, he slid his hand across Flynn's body letting it come to rest on Flynn's hip. He gently edged himself closer and held Flynn a little bit tighter. If heaven was something physical, it would be what they were both feeling right now. Knowing that Aaron's skin always felt so soft and smooth after he'd showered, Flynn couldn't resist running his fingers over Aaron's body under his jumper as Aaron did the same to him. As they carried on kissing, they were interrupted by a loud knock on the door making both of them groan but not for the right reason.

"Bet that's mum and dad" Flynn said.

"Great timing" Aaron sighed, reluctantly disentangling himself from Flynn. "I'll go."

"You might want to take a slow walk" Flynn said with a grin on his face "or it'll look like you're quite pleased to see them."

Aaron blushed slightly. "Well you go then. "

"Can't, I'm worse than you" Flynn said fidgeting, trying to get comfortable.

Aaron glanced down and saw that he was telling the truth. "You better use one of them cushions then until you calm down" he said with a smile.

"Yeah cos that wouldn't look too suspicious would it? They walk in and I'm sitting here with a cushion on my lap."

"Well, rest your cast on it then, they'll never know." He strolled over and opened the front door, standing behind it to let Flynn's parents back in. They walked past him into the living room before taking the carrier bags straight into the kitchen. When Aaron closed the door, he walked back into the living room and smiled at Flynn. "Fancy a drink?" he asked.

"Yeah, that'd be good, thanks."

"Had any tablets today?"

Flynn shook his head.

"Shall I get you a beer then?"

"Yeah, why not?"

Aaron walked into the kitchen and over to the fridge. "Well, you look better than you did when we went out" Flynn's mum said to him.

"Yeah, it's amazing what having a hot shower can do." Aaron took out three bottles of lager. He offered one to Flynn's dad and kept the other two. "Do you want a hand with anything?"

"No, you're alright love. You go and keep Flynn company. You too, I'll be fine on my own" she said to her husband, ushering them both out of the kitchen. While she prepared a simple spaghetti Bolognese with a salad and crusty bread, Aaron, Flynn and his dad sat chatting happily in the living room. Whenever they caught each other's eyes, Aaron and Flynn would smile at each other, smiles which Flynn's dad either didn't notice or chose not to pass comment on. When the food was ready, they sat at the table in the kitchen to eat it. The meal was lovely and Flynn was able to manage without needing any help. Once the plates had been cleared, Flynn's mum brought over a vanilla cheesecake for dessert. The conversation flowed nicely and Aaron and Flynn were the most relaxed they'd been in days. The time passed by really quickly and before they knew it, Flynn's parents were saying it was time they made a move. Both Aaron and Flynn thanked them for the meal and Flynn saw them out. He closed and locked the front door before joining Aaron in the living room.

"I am stuffed" Aaron said "I couldn't eat another thing."

"Me too. It was lovely though. I fancy a coffee. Do you want one?"

"Yeah. I'll do it."

"No you're alright. I can manage two coffees. I'll have to bring them out one at a time but.." Flynn shrugged as he walked into the kitchen. The atmosphere in the house had changed in those last few hours, they could both feel it. There was still an air of tension about but not a horrible one, more of a so what happens now type of tension. Aaron knew what he wanted to happen but he was trying not to get ahead of himself. He knew it was a big step for Flynn to take, to let him get close and intimate with him again and it might still be too soon. Their kisses earlier that evening though had shown him they were at least heading in the right direction and he was happy about that. If that was all that happened between them tonight, then he'd take it gladly. While Flynn waited in the kitchen for the coffee maker to heat up, he thought about what should happen next. He didn't want to sleep in the spare room anymore, he wanted to sleep in his own bed with Aaron, where he belonged. He was nervous about it, about where it might lead but his heart told him it was the right thing to do. Having principles was fine but principles can't cuddle you or hold you close while you drift off to sleep. He made the coffees and brought them out one by one to the living room where he sat down next to Aaron again.

"I er, I've been thinking. I thought I might try sleeping back in our bed tonight, you know, see how I get on."

Aaron looked calm on the outside but inside was a completely different story. "Oh right. Are you sure you want to face my lethal elbows?"

"Yeah I am as long as you can put up with me fidgeting. I'm still struggling to get comfortable at the moment."

"I'm sure I'll manage. I'm still awake most of the night anyway."

Flynn leant over and kissed Aaron tenderly again before snuggling up against him. Neither spoke as they watched some TV and drank their coffee. Adam's words came back to Aaron as he gently stroked Flynn's arm and back as they relaxed. Be patient and everything will fall into place was what he'd said. Well tonight, it felt like things were finally falling into place.


	61. Chapter 61

As the theme music began to play and the final credits began to roll, Aaron and Flynn were disturbed from their thoughts and brought back to the here and now. They'd both been watching the TV programme but not really concentrating on it, both too busy thinking about what had happened between them earlier on that evening and just enjoying that feeling of closeness between them again. They felt happier than they'd felt in a long time knowing they'd taken a big step forward in repairing their relationship. Flynn moved first, sitting up and rubbing at his eyes while Aaron stretched and tried to get rid of the pins and needles in his hand and arm that had been caused by the way Flynn had been lying against him. He could have got rid of them ages ago by asking Flynn to move but he hadn't wanted to disturb him, not even for a few seconds so he'd just sat still and tried to ignore the unpleasant sensation as best he could. Luckily within a few seconds of Flynn moving, the tingling had stopped and the feeling had returned to his arm and hand so he stood up, picked up the two mugs from the table and took them into the kitchen. When he came back into the living room, he saw Flynn sitting staring into space. He wondered what he was thinking about, if it was the same thing that occupied his own thoughts which was what would happen when they went up to bed. As he walked towards him, he said "Right, I'm going up now. Are you coming?" Flynn turned to look at him and nodded his head. "Yeah, you go on up. I'll be there in a minute." Aaron leant down and placed a soft but brief kiss on Flynn's lips. "Ok" he said as he walked towards the door that led to the hallway. When he got there, he turned around to face Flynn who was looking pensive again. There was something he wanted to say to him. "Look Flynn, just because me and you have, well you know, just because we've kissed a bit and we're getting on better again, it doesn't mean I'm expecting anything else to happen between us tonight. It's a big step for you to take after what I did so if all you're comfortable with at the moment is what we've already done, then I'm ok with that. I'm just happy I'll be sharing a bed with you again." With a final smile, he left the room and went upstairs. Flynn used the remote control to switch off the TV and placed it on the sofa next to him. He sat for a couple of minutes in the silence thinking. When he stood up and switched out the lights, his mind was made up. With butterflies in his stomach, he made his own way upstairs to join Aaron.

After using the bathroom, he walked with his heart beating slightly quicker than usual along the landing, past the spare room and into their bedroom. The room was lit only by the light of a bedside lamp. Aaron was standing by his side of the bed with his back to Flynn, just about to remove his jeans. He pulled them down and dropped them on the floor leaving him standing in just his underwear. Flynn had forgotten what a great body Aaron had. Toned, smooth, quite muscular in places and even though it hadn't been that long since he'd seen Aaron without his clothes on, he looked at him as if it was the first time he'd seen him like this, letting his eyes wander over every inch of him and liking what he saw a lot. All of a sudden, he found himself feeling really self-conscious about how his own body looked right now. Whilst most of the cuts were now healed, the bruises at their various stages of healing were a completely different matter. Nearly every colour of the rainbow could be found on his body somewhere. It wasn't nice for him to look at and he was used to seeing it so god only knew what Aaron would think when he saw him. Aaron turned and smiled when he saw him standing there before climbing into bed. "Better set the alarm I suppose, seeing as one of us still has to go to work tomorrow."

"Well, if you want anything recording so you can watch it when you get home, just let me know. A bit of Loose Women perhaps or a repeat of Midsomer Murders?"

Aaron laughed. "Thanks but I think I'll survive without seeing either of them programmes." He busied himself setting the alarm clock, partly because he had to but partly because he knew what it would do to him if he was to watch Flynn take his clothes off. He'd meant what he'd said to him downstairs a few minutes ago but he wasn't a machine. Yes of course he was ok if all they did was kiss and cuddle but at the same time, he loved Flynn and wanted to get close to him again, show him how much he loved him but the decision as to when he would be allowed to do that was out of his hands. Flynn sat down on the bed and began to undress. He'd become pretty good at undressing himself using only one hand, it was easier than dressing himself with one hand anyway, so it didn't take too long before he was down to his underwear too. As he stood up to get into bed, Aaron saw how badly bruised Flynn's body still was. The bruises didn't look quite as bad as they had when he'd seen them that day in the hospital when they were fresh but they were still bad enough. Instead of finding them ugly or off putting though, they just reminded him how lucky Flynn had been that day that he hadn't been more seriously hurt. "It's not a very pretty sight is it?" Flynn said, blushing as he caught Aaron looking at him. "You look fine to me" Aaron said looking into Flynn's eyes. Flynn smiled at him gratefully as he climbed into bed and pulled the duvet up over him. He lay for a few seconds, enjoying the familiarity of being back in their room again, back in his own bed and he could feel himself start to relax. The bed in the spare room had been fine but this was where he belonged, in this bed with his boyfriend. He turned on to his good side to find Aaron watching him. "Comfortable?" he asked, his light blue eyes gazing into Flynn's. "Very" Flynn replied as Aaron snuggled up to him. They lay that way for a few minutes before Aaron pulled away, startling Flynn. "What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing. I was just going to switch the light off." Aaron turned his body away from Flynn and stretched an arm out towards the lamp. "No, don't, leave it on" he heard Flynn say. Aaron's heart rate quickened as he felt Flynn's hand take hold of his arm and pull him back towards him, pulling him into a kiss like the ones they'd shared earlier. He felt Flynn slide his body closer to his, feeling it make contact as they continued to kiss. It was the sort of kiss that you could lose yourself in and Aaron and Flynn were definitely lost in it. Their world at that moment consisted of just them and their bedroom. That was it, nothing else existed and nothing else mattered. With their arms around each other and their legs entwined, Flynn slipped his tongue into Aaron's welcoming mouth, deepening the kiss even more. As their breathing became heavier and the pleasure intensified, Aaron was reminded how different this felt to when he had been with Tariq. What he was experiencing now was a million miles away from that night. His whole body felt alive as Flynn touched him and stroked him, moving his hand over his bare skin while he did the same to him. The fact that he had to be gentler with Flynn than he would usually have been had he been fully fit served only to make the whole experience much more sensual for both of them.

Completely hard now, they could feel their erections rubbing against each other as they moved their bodies together in a slow seductive rhythm. Aaron threw his head back as Flynn kissed, sucked and gently bit his way from his mouth, along his jaw and down his neck to his chest where he used his tongue to tease Aaron's nipples, unable to help himself from smiling as he listened to Aaron's groans and sighs of pleasure. He worked his way back up to Aaron's waiting mouth and kissed him passionately again. They kicked the duvet off themselves as they got hotter and hotter, moving their hands at the same time to take hold of the other one's cock and start to fondle and stroke it through their underwear, neither able to not touch any longer. Their moaning and sighing gradually got louder and louder as ripples of pleasure flowed through them. Flynn moved his hand up to the waistband of Aaron's boxers and hooked his fingers inside, pulling the garment away from his body. With a smile he said "I might need your help getting these off and mine too of course." Aaron smiled back at him, only too pleased to be getting rid of the restrictive piece of clothing. "I think I can manage that" he said as he removed his own underwear first before taking Flynn's off. Once they were naked, things escalated pretty quickly between them. They were both incredibly turned on and things weren't so gentle between them any longer. Aaron wasn't sure how much more he could take and judging by the way that Flynn was reacting, he was feeling exactly the same. He decided to try to slow things down, make it last a bit longer so he removed his hand from Flynn's cock and began to play with one of his nipples instead. "No, don't stop" Flynn moaned "It feels too good for you to stop now." As if to prove his point, he continued to stroke Aaron who closed his eyes, biting down on his bottom lip as he lay lost in what Flynn was doing to him. He had to agree with him. It did feel too good to stop now. Taking hold of Flynn's cock again and moving his hand up and down, he murmured "Ok, I won't if you don't." In a voice that was barely audible, Flynn whispered "Deal." It didn't take too much longer for both of them to reach the point of no return. Flynn just about had time to warn Aaron that he was going to come before his orgasm hit him, leaving him breathless and gasping for air. Seeing and feeling Flynn's orgasm was enough to trigger Aaron's own. It was one of the most intense he'd ever experienced and it left him completely drained and trembling in Flynn's arms. As it began to subside, he felt a gentle kiss being placed on his forehead, followed by one on his nose and finally on his lips. He happily returned Flynn's tender kiss, neither wanting to let go of the other one just yet, not after what they'd just shared. After a few minutes, they separated to clean themselves up before cuddling up together again. "Are you ok?" Aaron asked, gently stroking Flynn's chest. "After that, what do you think?" Flynn replied, kissing the top of his head.

"I meant are you ok as in did I hurt you? I tried to be gentle but we both got a bit carried away at the end there."

"I know we did but you didn't hurt me. I'm fine."

"Good." Aaron waited a few seconds before speaking again. "I've really missed you, you know. I've missed being with you like this."

"I know. I've missed being with you too."

Aaron looked up into Flynn's eyes and cupping his jaw kissed him again. "Right, better switch that light off for real this time and try to get some sleep" he said beginning to roll away from Flynn. "Oh no you don't" Flynn said stopping him from moving "What is it with you and that light tonight?" he asked smiling at Aaron "You're determined to plunge us into darkness aren't you or are you really that tired that you want to go to sleep?"

"No, course I'm not, I just thought" his words trailed away as he cast his eyes downward. Flynn put his hand under Aaron's chin and gently pushed upwards forcing Aaron to look at him.

"You just thought what?" he asked.

"I just thought that what we just did might have been enough for you for tonight. I mean you said that you needed time, that it would take a while for things to go back to how it was before between us."

"I know I did but I was wrong. I thought keeping my distance from you was the right thing to do for me but it wasn't. I thought I needed time but I don't. I love you Aaron so much and what I want, what I need is for me and you to be back to how we were before, doing all the things we used to do before and not in a couple of days or a couple of weeks but right now."

"That's what I want too, more than anything."

"Good. So, why don't we stop talking and put our mouths to a much better use."

"By doing what with them?" Aaron asked trying his best to look innocent. Flynn pushed him onto his back and rolled on top of him. "I'll show you" he said.

When Flynn woke up the next morning, he found himself alone in the bed. He reached out his hand and touched the side that Aaron usually slept on and found that it was still warm. He smiled knowing that Aaron hadn't been gone very long, that he was still in the house somewhere. He lay in comfort thinking about the previous night, about how amazing it had felt for him and Aaron to make love to each other again, how great it was to love someone with everything you've got and know that they feel the same way about you. The pleasure they'd both experienced last night he couldn't put into words and he knew that nothing or no one would ever come between them again. He heard footsteps coming along the landing and watched as the bedroom door opened. Aaron came in completely naked carrying a mug in each hand, his face breaking into a big smile when he saw that Flynn was awake.

"I hope you were careful carrying those" Flynn said smiling back at him "You could have done yourself a nasty injury if you'd spilled any."

"I know which is why I didn't fill them all the way up to the top." Aaron placed one mug of tea down on the bedside cabinet next to Flynn and carried the other one round to his side of the bed.

"Not that I mind seeing you like that first thing in the morning but why didn't you just chuck some clothes on?" Flynn asked taking a couple of mouthfuls of tea before putting the mug down again. "You've got to get dressed for work anyway."

"Yeah, about that" Aaron said climbing back into bed and settling down next to Flynn again. "I phoned Cain while I was down there and told him I wouldn't be in today. I said I'd eaten something dodgy and unless he wanted me running to the loo every few minutes it'd be better if I wasn't there."

"Why'd you do that?"

"I just didn't want to go in today. I'd rather be here with you."

"Aw, come here, soppy git." Flynn put his arm around Aaron as Aaron cuddled up close to him. "So if we're going to spend the day together, what do you fancy doing?" he asked.

"Well, a repeat of last night would be good or we could raid the cupboards, bring up all the junk food we can find and watch DVD's in bed all day or I could bring the X box up and connect it to the TV up here."

"Er, I can only use one hand remember. Mind you, it's probably the only way you'll ever beat me."

"Haha, funny. Ok forget the X box."

"I don't suppose you've got any suggestions that don't involve us being in bed all day have you?" Flynn asked turning to look at Aaron.

"Erm, hang on a minute, let me think." Aaron lay for a couple of seconds in silence pretending to think before saying "No I don't." He pulled back just enough to be able to kiss Flynn and they shared their first kiss of the day, a slow deep kiss that lasted for ages. The mugs of tea were left to go cold as Aaron got what he'd wished for, a repeat of the previous night. As they lay together afterwards, both were silent, enjoying the feeling of closeness between them that now felt even stronger than it had before. Aaron lay with his head on Flynn's chest, listening to his heartbeat, Flynn's fingers gently making little patterns across his back. "There's something good about not being at work when everyone else is" Aaron said "It's a bit like that feeling you got when you bunked off school." .

"I never bunked off school."

Aaron moved his head to look up at Flynn. "You are joking, right."

Flynn laughed. "No, I'm serious. I had no need to bunk off. I quite liked school."

Aaron curled his top lip up and pulled one of his trademark faces. "You're weird. I bet you used to always do your homework and hand it in on time as well didn't you?"

"Of course I did. I was a model pupil unlike you by the sounds of it. It was only when I was at college and met you that I started bunking off."

"Yeah but that doesn't count does it? You weren't at college all day every day anyway were you?"

"No but I still missed lectures when you phoned and asked if we could meet."

Aaron smiled at him. "So are you saying that I turned you into a bit of a bad boy?"

"No, I just found it difficult to say no to you. I still do."

Aaron raised his eyebrows. "I'll have to remember that. It could come in handy one day."

"I said I find it difficult, not impossible." Flynn glanced at the clock over Aaron's shoulder. "So, are you ready for some food yet? It's nearly lunchtime."

"Too right I am but this time I am putting some clothes on."

They went downstairs and while Aaron busied himself in the kitchen, Flynn went looking through their collection of DVD's for a couple of films they could watch that afternoon. "Weren't you supposed to phone your boss today and let him know if you'll be back in work next week?" Aaron called through from the kitchen.

"Oh shit, I forgot about that. Yeah I was."

"So do you think you're up to it?" Aaron came into the living room with their lunch before going back into the kitchen to bring out a couple of drinks.

"Yeah, I don't see why not. I'll have to get the bus though."

"Or I could drop you off and pick you up. I'm sure I could sort something out with Cain until you're able to drive again."

"Ok, thanks, that'd be great."

"No problem. So, if you're up to going back to work, do you fancy going out tonight then?" Aaron asked. "It feels like we haven't been out in ages."

"Yeah, I'd really like that. Anyway, I better phone work now before I forget."

Once lunch was eaten, they spent the rest of the day watching films and relaxing. So far, they'd had a perfect day, just the two of them just the way they liked it. That evening, Aaron went up for his shower first. When Flynn went upstairs a few minutes later, Aaron was just coming out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist. "If you need a hand with anything, let me know" Aaron said with a grin, placing a kiss on Flynn's lips before heading towards the bedroom. By the time Flynn had had his shower, Aaron was dressed and ready to go. Flynn sat down on the bed and began to dry himself off. Aaron walked on his knees across the bed and put his arms around Flynn from behind, resting his head on his shoulder. He loved the way Flynn smelt and how warm his body was after a shower. He kissed Flynn's neck a couple of times before turning Flynn's head towards him so they could kiss. After a few seconds, Flynn broke the kiss and stood up, moving away from Aaron.

"Go on you, downstairs" he said with a grin "otherwise we'll never make it out tonight."

"Spoilsport" was Aaron's one word reply as he left Flynn to get ready. He'd been waiting patiently in the living room for what seemed like ages before he finally heard footsteps coming down the stairs. He glanced up to see Flynn standing there topless, with his jeans hanging on his hips, zip and belt open with a glimpse of his boxers on show. "Oh come on, now that's not fair" Aaron groaned "You send me down here out of the way to make sure we do actually leave the house tonight and then you come down looking like that."

Flynn grinned. "I'm sorry but I can't do them up. I've been up there trying for ages but I just can't do it. Will you do them up for me?"

"Do I have to?"

Flynn nodded his head. Aaron walked over and did the button up before carefully pulling up the zip and fastening Flynn's belt. "There, all sorted. Now go get dressed while I've still got a little bit of willpower left in me" he said.

Less than an hour later, Aaron and Flynn were sitting at a table in Bar West with a couple of bottles of lager in front of them. Friday nights were always busy and tonight was no exception. The music was loud and they were enjoying being out together. At a table not too far away, Matt was enjoying a long slow kiss with his new boyfriend who was called Will. He was a tall, good looking guy who worked out but not to the point of obsession, just to keep fit. He had fair hair and blue eyes and a smile that made Matt's stomach flip whenever he saw it. They'd only been seeing each other a few weeks but it was going really well. Matt broke the kiss and leant forward to pick up his drink. As he did so, he glanced up and through a gap in the crowd spotted Aaron and Flynn. He was surprised but pleased to see them together and looking so happy. Well, he was pleased for Flynn anyway because he knew what Aaron meant to him but he was still annoyed with Aaron for hurting him in the first place.

"So who are those two then?" Will asked, nodding over towards Aaron and Flynn. "You obviously know them but I don't think I've seen them before."

"It's an old ex of mine from years ago and his boyfriend. They had a big bust up recently, a really bad one, it looked like they were going to split at one point."

"Well, they look like they're getting on fine now" Will said with a smile as they watched Aaron and Flynn kissing each other.

"Yeah, they do. They must have sorted it. Right, pool table looks like it free. Fancy a game?" He stood up and held out his hand to Will who took it and followed him through the bar. A while later, having had enough of playing pool, Will went to look for a table while Matt went to get them some drinks. Just after he'd ordered, he heard a voice say "Alright." He turned to see a sheepish looking Aaron standing next to him. "Yeah I'm good thanks, you?" he replied. Aaron nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. Listen, I just wanted to say thank you for looking after Flynn that night, you know when it all kicked off."

"So he told you he was with me?" Matt asked. Aaron nodded his head. "Yeah well you don't need to thank me. I couldn't have left him on his own, not in the state he was in." He kept his eyes on Aaron who instantly looked guilty. The barman placed Matt's drinks down in front of him and Matt handed over the right money.

"Well, thanks anyway. He told me you gave him some good advice that night."

Matt looked at Aaron without a hint of a smile on his face. "I said what I said because as far as he's concerned, you're the one for him, no one else could even come close to you. I was trying to do what I thought was best for him but I'll tell you this for nothing. If you hurt him again and I get to hear about it, I won't be sending him back to you a second time. Instead, I'll be telling him to stay as far away from you as possible and trying to convince him that maybe second best isn't so bad after all."

"I won't hurt him again."

"They're words Aaron just like when you stood over there and told me you'd treat him how he deserved to be treated and you'd never hurt him like I did yet that's exactly what you ended up doing."

"I know, I don't need you to remind me what I did. It's fixed in my head and it'll never go away but like I said, I won't be hurting him in any way, shape or form ever again. I've learnt my lesson."

"I hope you have Aaron, for Flynn's sake." With that, Matt picked up his drinks and went off to find Will. Aaron turned and waited for the barman to come over and serve him. He wasn't surprised by what Matt had said to him. He knew that anything he'd done that night hadn't been for his benefit but for Flynn's and he didn't blame him for still being protective but his words had darkened his mood. He ordered his and Flynn's drinks, paid for them and took them over to the table where Flynn was sitting.

"Here, I've just seen Matt sitting over there and he's with a bloke."

"No, not a bloke" Aaron said in mock horror as he sat down next to him again.

Flynn looked at him. "Do you want a whack of this?" he asked holding up his cast. "I meant I think he's finally got a boyfriend."

"Oh right." Aaron decided not to tell Flynn about the chat he'd just had with Matt. He didn't see the point and he was pretty sure Matt wouldn't mention it to him either if they spoke.

"I'm really glad we came out tonight. Thank you for suggesting it." Flynn leant towards Aaron and kissed him. With Flynn's lips pressed against his and his hand resting on his thigh, Aaron's mood quickly lifted again and soon Matt's words were forgotten.

"It's no good. I'm going to have to go to the loo soon" Flynn said starting to fidget.

"Want me to come with you to help do your jeans up afterwards?"

Flynn shook his head. "I've got a better idea. If we head for home, I can use the loo there and it won't matter if I can't do my jeans up again afterwards. In fact" he said leaning really close to Aaron's ear "I wouldn't have to wear my jeans at all if we were at home or anything else for that matter."

"Right, we're going" Aaron said getting to his feet. He looked down at Flynn who hadn't moved and was still sitting smiling up at him. "Well come on then. You can't say things like that to me and then just sit there. Haven't you teased me enough tonight?"

"I've only just started" Flynn said getting to his feet.


	62. Chapter 62

A couple of weeks had now passed since the night that Aaron and Flynn had put all their problems behind them and reunited as a couple. Things were going great and they were still very much in that honeymoon period where they hated being apart and couldn't get enough of each other when they were together. Every room in the house had seen some sort of action between them including the landing which was where they were both now lying naked and sweaty side by side, surrounded by their discarded work clothes. Aaron turned his head sideways to look at Flynn, a smile breaking out on both of their faces as their eyes met. "I can't believe our bedroom is only a few feet that way and we didn't get to it" Aaron said.

"That's because you were too busy wanting to get to it out here. Talk about impatient."

"Well, I can't help the effect you have on me can I? Besides, I don't remember you trying very hard to stop me."

"And why would I want to stop you when I know what's waiting for me under those clothes of yours?" They smiled at each other again, unable to help themselves. At that moment, they felt like there was no one else in the world who could possibly be any happier than they were and it wasn't solely because they'd just had the most amazing sex with each other either. It was more than that, went deeper than that. They were happy because they'd gone through a really horrible time in their lives, faced the biggest test of their relationship so far, and there'd been a few and had come out the other side stronger and more in love than ever.

"You know I reckon that's every part of the house now that me and you have erm, what's a nice way of putting this?" Aaron asked.

"Christened" Flynn said raising his eyebrows. Aaron laughed. "Yeah christened, nice one, unless you count the garden shed of course. We haven't done it in there."

"Yeah and we're not going to either."

Aaron turned onto his side and, leaning on one elbow, propped his head up with his hand. "Are you sure about that?" His blue eyes twinkled mischievously as he trailed one finger up and down Flynn's chest while waiting for his reply.

"Yes, I am. It's dirty and small and there'll be spiders and god knows what other creepy crawlies scuttling around in there."

"So?"

"So, it's not happening, I am not getting my kit off in that shed, not even for you. You can forget it. "

Aaron shrugged. "Well, we'll just have to see about that won't we?" He leant over Flynn and kissed him tenderly, allowing his hand to move lightly over Flynn's taut stomach before coming to rest on his hip. Flynn moved his hand around to the back of Aaron's neck, pulling him closer, deepening the kiss. They both heard Aaron's mobile ringing but they chose to ignore it. Whoever it was they could wait, they weren't worth interrupting this moment for, no one was. "Are you sure you're ok about going to the village tonight?" Aaron asked when they eventually stopped kissing and stood up to start picking their clothes up off the floor. When people first heard about Flynn's accident, they frequently stopped Aaron to ask how Flynn was doing and, while it was nice that people were interested and cared about his wellbeing, there were times when he felt like a stuck record, saying the same thing over and over again. As time went by and he told them that Flynn was doing much better, they then started asking when they would see them together in the village again hence their visit to Emmerdale that evening. "Course I'm ok about it. I'm looking forward to it actually. We've not been for a while. Now, do you want the shower first or second?"

"First, you still take ages" Aaron replied handing Flynn his clothes as he walked into the bathroom calling over his shoulder "I won't be long." Flynn waited in the bedroom for his turn, then after showering and getting dressed, he put on some aftershave and headed downstairs. He found Aaron in the kitchen, phone to his ear, leaning with his back against the sink. "Yes Mum we're definitely still coming to the pub tonight." He looked at Flynn, raised his eyebrows and shook his head before walking towards him. "Well if you get off the phone, we'll be there a lot quicker won't we? Alright we'll see you in a bit and the first round's on you ok." He ended the call putting his phone back into the pocket of his jeans. "I've got a feeling.."

"Woo hoo, that tonight's gonna be a good night" Flynn sang. Aaron looked at him completely straight faced. "Have you finished?"

"Sorry, I always get the urge to sing that whenever anyone starts a sentence with I've got a feeling. You carry on."

"Cheers. I was going to say that I think she's going to be with us all night."

"That's alright. It's because she hasn't seen you in a while."

"Yes she has, we saw each other the other day when Cain sent me to get the bacon rolls."

"For a couple of minutes maybe. When was the last time you two sat and had a proper chat?" Aaron pulled a face as he thought. "Exactly. What with the accident and everything, we've been spending all our time together which is great for me and you but not so good for her. You can't really blame her for wanting to spend some time with you tonight can you?"

"Hmm, suppose not. Right, you ready to go then?" Aaron asked as he grabbed the car keys.

"You know we could always phone a taxi, you don't have to drive."

"Nah, I'm not that fussed about drinking tonight to be honest. Besides, if we've got the car and I get tired of Mum bending my ear, we can make a quick getaway."

"Not just a pretty face are you?" Flynn said with a grin. They drove via a cashpoint in town to the village where the pub was busy as it usually was on a Friday night. They looked around and spotted Paddy, Chas and Cain sitting together at a table not far from the dart board. They made their way over to join them while Chas, as soon as she saw them, got up to get them some drinks. When she came back to the table, Aaron made a point of asking her to sit next to him. Chas's face lit up as he shuffled closer to Flynn to make room for her to sit down. While making sure his hand never lost contact with Flynn's thigh, Aaron spent a good while talking to his Mum, just the two of them, leaving the others around the table to talk amongst themselves which they did quite happily. They ordered some food and some more drinks and everyone was relaxed, happy and having a good time. At various times during the evening, other villagers came over to chat to Flynn, asking how he was doing and saying how good it was to see him again. He felt quite overwhelmed by it all, very different to those early days with Aaron when he'd felt really nervous about whether he'd be accepted in the village. After being there for a few hours, it got to the point where he needed to go to the toilet so he stood up and, feeling his hand move, Aaron glanced up at him. "OK?" he asked.

"I'm just off to the loo" Flynn said.

"I'll come with you" Aaron replied standing up.

"And there was me thinking it was only women that went to the toilet in twos. I didn't realise you lot did it as well" Cain said with a smirk on his face. Flynn just smiled at him as Aaron punched him on the arm as they walked past. When they'd left the bar, Flynn said "You know I can manage to undo my jeans and do them up again by myself now."

"I know but I needed a break from my Mum. I can't believe she's still banging on." Flynn smiled at him before putting his hand on Aaron's arm to stop him from walking any further. He kissed him softly but with feeling. "What was that for?" Aaron asked, gazing into Flynn's eyes as their lips parted. "No reason, just felt like kissing my boyfriend." Aaron smiled before leaning in to kiss him again, sliding his arms around him to hold Flynn tightly. Adam on his way in to the pub via the toilet stumbled across them. "Sorry boys" he said, smiling apologetically as Aaron and Flynn separated to see who was heading their way. "It's alright" Flynn said leaving Aaron where he was as he walked towards the gents.

"Well, I'm not one to blow my own trumpet and say I told you so but I told you so." Adam grinned at his best mate. "I knew you two wouldn't be able to keep your hands off each other for long. So, everything's ok, normal service resumed I take it?" Aaron laughed. "Yeah you could say that. Things are great actually. It's like before but better if that makes sense."

"Yeah, I think I get what you're saying. So, you two will be setting a date soon then seeing as things are going so well?"

"Oh, I don't know about that. We've not mentioned getting married, not for a while now."

"But it's still what you both want?"

"Yeah, well I assume so, like I said, we haven't spoken about it."

"Well, maybe you should. You can't stay engaged forever. Well, you can I suppose but it'd be pretty pointless and we haven't had a good wedding in ages. Think about it." He patted Aaron on the shoulder and walked off into the bar.

After a lie in the next morning, Aaron and Flynn decided to go into town. They wanted to buy a present for Harrison and Jess's baby, a little girl they'd called Ruby Grace. Flynn came running downstairs and into the living room calling out "Aaron, have you seen my wallet?" only to see Aaron talking on the phone. He mouthed an apology as Aaron held his hand up telling him to be quiet. "Alright then, we'll see you later this afternoon then" he said. Flynn could tell straight away that something was up just by the tone of Aaron's voice although if he needed further proof, he only had to look at his face. "Everything alright?" he asked as he walked towards him. Aaron sighed. "No not really. That was Joe. He said he needs to talk to us about this place. He's up for the weekend so he asked if he could come round this afternoon." Flynn's face fell serious as he stood in front of Aaron. "That's strange. The year's not up for another couple of months yet. Did he say exactly what it was he wanted to talk to us about?" Aaron shook his head. "No he didn't. What if he wants to move back here Flynn? What if he wants our home back?"

"Trust you to think like that."

"Well if his job hasn't worked out, he'll have no choice but to move back and me and you will be homeless. Then we'll have to go through that nightmare again of looking for somewhere to live and if we can't find anywhere, then what are we supposed to do? I can't go back to living apart again, not after all this time and even if we both lived at Paddy's or at your Mum and Dad's place, it wouldn't be the same, it wouldn't be ours."

"Hey, come here" Flynn soothed putting his arms around Aaron and pulling him into a hug. He was just as worried as Aaron was about the prospect of losing their home but one of them had to try and remain positive and it was obvious from Aaron's reaction that it was going to have to be him. "Listen to me. We don't know anything yet. For all we know, he could be coming to tell us that he loves his new job and they've extended his contract and we can have this place for as long as we want it." Aaron pulled back and looked at him. "Do you really think he'd come all this way just to tell us that?" Flynn smiled at him. "Maybe he's coming up for another reason and he's killing two birds with one stone. Who knows? But there is something I do know. If he doesn't say what we want to hear and we do have to move out, then I promise you we'll find somewhere else to live that we like just as much. I don't want us living apart either Aaron." Aaron looked into Flynn's eyes. "But I love this place. I love living here with you. I don't want to have to leave."

"I know, I don't either and hopefully we won't have to but there's nothing we can do until we know what Joe's going to say to us. Worrying about it isn't going to do any good is it?" Aaron shook his head. "So, why don't we go into town like we planned, grab some lunch and try to forget about it for a while." Aaron nodded and forced a smile. "I see you've still got it then" he said to Flynn.

"Got what?" Flynn asked.

"The knack of knowing exactly the right thing to say to make me feel better."

"Yeah well, that's part of my job isn't it? Keeping you happy. Come on, think positive." He placed a brief kiss on Aaron's lips and walked away to continue looking for his wallet.

Later that afternoon, after spending as pleasant a time in town as they could, Flynn and Aaron were back home waiting for Joe's arrival. They were both anxious and unable to settle properly although Flynn was still hiding it better than Aaron was. Flynn had gone upstairs to the bathroom when there was a knock on the front door. Aaron opened it to see Joe standing there. "Alright mate, come in" he said, standing back to allow Joe entry to the house. "Alright Smiler, good to see you again" Joe replied as he followed Aaron in to the living room. "Can I get you a beer?" Aaron asked as Joe sat down in the armchair. "Yeah that'd be great, thanks." When Aaron went into the kitchen, Joe had a quick look round the room. He'd been a bit anxious about coming back to the house again, he wasn't sure how it'd feel being back and he had to admit it felt weird. Although it hadn't really changed a great deal since he'd left, it felt different somehow. His eyes came to rest on a picture of Aaron and Flynn on the window ledge, a lovely picture that exuded happiness and love and sighing he had to look away. Hearing footsteps coming down the stairs, Joe looked up to see Flynn enter the living room. "Bloody hell, what happened to you?" he asked. Flynn smiled at him. "Car accident" he replied taking a seat on the sofa. "You should have seen him when it first happened. He was not a pretty sight" Aaron chipped in as he handed round some cans before sitting down next to Flynn.

"I can imagine. So how long til that cast comes off?" Joe asked as he opened his can and took a couple of large mouthfuls before putting it on the table.

"About another month and it can't come soon enough, I tell you." They talked for a few minutes, general stuff before Joe said "I suppose you're wondering what I need to talk to you about." Aaron and Flynn looked at each other, the moment they'd been dreading had arrived. "Yeah, you have got us kind of curious and a bit worried if I'm honest" Aaron said. Joe nodded his head. "Look, there's no easy way to say this. The company that I work for are making a load of redundancies. They started down south and they're gradually working their way northwards. At the moment, I don't know if my job's safe or not. I thought really hard about whether I should tell you now or wait until I know for definite. You see, they're making their decision in four weeks time and if I do lose my job, I'll have to leave my place by the end of the following month. If I'd waited until I know for sure, that would only have left you four weeks to find somewhere else and that's not very long. " He scratched his head and sighed as he looked at the two serious faces opposite him. The silence in the room was deafening as Flynn and Aaron let what they'd just been told sink in. "I'm sorry, I really am, I feel awful" Joe said sincerely. "It's not your fault" Aaron said with a shrug. "I know but it doesn't make me feel any better. I mean it goes without saying that if I do have to come back, you're welcome to stay here, I wouldn't put you out on the streets but I'm guessing you wouldn't want that, that it would be too weird."

"Yeah, just a bit" Flynn said "but thanks anyway." They went quiet again, no one really knowing what to say next. Aaron and Flynn knew they should feel sorry for Joe but all they could think about was the fact that they could lose the house they loved living in. Joe stood up and smiled apologetically. "Well, now I've ruined your day, I suppose I better get off. I hope I've done the right thing by telling you now and not waiting."

"You have mate. At least, we can start looking around just in case." Aaron stood up to walk to the front door. "I'll let you know as soon as I can, one way or the other" Joe said as he followed him. "I really am sorry" he said again as he stepped out into the late afternoon sunshine. After Aaron closed the door, he walked back in and flopped down next to Flynn. They both felt like they'd had all the stuffing knocked out of them. "See, told you it was going to be bad news didn't I?" Aaron said with a big sigh. "Yeah you did. I suppose I had a pretty good idea myself, I was just trying to stay positive." Flynn ran his hand through his hair before rubbing his forehead. Aaron smiled at him. "I know. Funny thing is, although we knew from the beginning us living here was only for a year to start with, I never thought about how we might have to leave."

"Me either but I suppose we've got to face the fact now that we might have to." Flynn stood up and walked into the kitchen "What you doing?" Aaron called through to him. "Getting my laptop. I suppose we might as well have a look at what's out there."

"What, right now?"

"Eight weeks is going to fly by" Flynn said as he sat back down next to Aaron and opened his laptop. "We need to be ready just in case."

The following Saturday, Flynn was enjoying a cup of coffee in town waiting for Aaron to meet him. Aaron was at the doctors about his sleep problem and although he'd wanted to go with him, Aaron had said it wasn't worth it. He'd told him he wasn't ill as such and had sent him to wait for him in the coffee shop. He glanced up just as Aaron was walking towards him. Aaron sat down on the sofa next to him and kissed him briefly on the lips. "Are you having a coffee?" Flynn asked smiling at him. "No, I'm ok at the minute" Aaron replied picking up Flynn's half eaten apple Danish and taking a bite. "So how did it go?" Flynn asked him. Aaron swallowed his mouthful of cake before saying "It was fine. She listened to what I had to say and she didn't make me feel like an idiot for thinking like I do which was a bonus. She said there was a good counsellor that they use and she was happy to make a referral but it could be up to six weeks before I get an appointment."

"Six weeks? That's ridiculous."

"Obviously there's a lot of people out there who need help. The only thing she said I could do to make it quicker was to accept a last minute appointment, you know if someone cancels for some reason so I said yeah, I'd do it."

"I'm really proud of you, you know, for doing this."

Aaron tutted. "Behave yourself. I said I'd get myself sorted didn't I? Besides, it'll be nice to be able to go to bed and not lie awake for hours listening to you snoring your head off."

"I don't snore" Flynn said indignantly. "How would you know, you're asleep. And some of the things you say.." He shook his head. "Oh so now I talk in my sleep as well. Is there anything else I do in my sleep that I should know about?" Aaron just raised his eyebrows and finished off the rest of the apple Danish before saying "Are you ready then?" They'd arranged some property viewings, which he really wasn't looking forward to but Flynn thought it was the sensible thing to do so he'd gone along with it. Flynn stood up and grabbed his jacket. "Yep, let's go. I don't really talk in my sleep do I?" he asked as they walked out of the coffee shop. "Come on, the car's this way" Aaron said with a smile.

The first property they looked at wasn't too bad. It was pretty similar to the house they lived in at the moment except the area wasn't as nice and it looked like parking might be a problem but, all things considered, it was alright. The next two however were far from alright. One was a flat that they both disliked as soon as they set foot in the door and the other, another house, was a bit run down but that was overshadowed by the constant barking of a dog coming from the house next door. By the time they arrived at the fourth and last property they were due to look at that day, Aaron was in a pretty bad mood. Although it was a much newer property than anything they'd looked at before and it was on a nice new estate, he'd already decided that he hated having to look for somewhere else to live when they already had somewhere that was perfect. "This doesn't look too bad does it?" Flynn said trying to ignore the change in Aaron's mood "and it's got a garage." Aaron gave the house a quick once over. "It looks alright" he said getting out of the car. He waited for Flynn to join him before they walked up the path where the letting agent was waiting for them. He greeted them both with a smile and a hand shake before taking them into the house. "So, we'll start in the living room" he said taking them into a light, airy room that was neutrally decorated. "As you can see, it's a decent size, there's wooden floors throughout the whole of the downstairs and the fireplace is a nice feature." Flynn nodded taking it all in while Aaron barely glanced around. "Through here's the kitchen" he continued leading them into the modern fitted kitchen. "It's not the biggest kitchen in the world but as you can see, it's got everything in it that you could want." He smiled when he caught Aaron's eye but the smile wasn't returned. "So, what's your initial thoughts?" he asked turning back to Flynn who was much more pleasant than his friend was. "Yeah, I like it, what do you think Aaron?"

"Well, it's a kitchen. There's not much you can say is there?" Flynn frowned at him. "And what about the rest of it?" he asked. "What the living room? It's ok." The letting agent sensing a bit of an atmosphere decided to carry on with the tour. "Right, I'll show you the bedrooms if you want to follow me" he said. Flynn looked at Aaron and shook his head before they followed the agent back through the living room and upstairs. "Right, I'll show you this one first." He opened the door which led into another neutrally decorated room. "They're both doubles, this one is slightly bigger than the other one but I'm sure you'll be able to decide amongst yourselves which one of you gets which room."

"We won't have to, we share a room" Aaron said as he walked past him and over to the window which looked over a neatly kept back garden. He knew he'd be in trouble with Flynn when they got back in the car so he deliberately didn't look at him. "Right, well that makes it easier then doesn't it?" the letting agent replied. Flynn smiled at him, then glared at Aaron's back before looking round the room. "Could we decorate if we wanted to?" Flynn asked "only all the rooms look a bit the same."

"Yeah that's fine as long as it's only cosmetic stuff."

"Well we're not likely to be knocking down walls or anything, muppet" Aaron mumbled but it was loud enough to be heard. They looked at the other bedroom and the bathroom before making their way back downstairs again. Aaron couldn't get away quick enough and sat in the car waiting for Flynn to join him. The slamming of the passenger door told him that Flynn had returned. He turned his head to find a clearly angry Flynn looking at him. "Unbelievable. Could you have been any ruder? What the hell was that all about?"

"He annoyed me. This is the kitchen, this is the bathroom, we're not idiots. We know what room we're in."

"He was only doing his job Aaron."

"So, and it didn't help that he had one of those faces that was just begging for a slap either." Flynn shook his head and breathed deeply. "Right, I know you don't want to move Aaron, I don't either but the way you behaved in there was wrong. It was embarrassing. It wasn't his fault we're in the situation we're in and you taking it out on him was bang out of order." Aaron looked down at his lap and said nothing. "Are you going to be like that every time we go looking at places?" Aaron just shrugged. "Brilliant, just brilliant. Well thank you for making a difficult situation just that little bit harder." That stung but Aaron knew that what Flynn had said was right. Flynn went to put his seat belt on but struggled with only using one hand. Every time he pulled on it, he didn't pull it far enough to get the clip into the holder and it kept springing back up again and he'd have to try again. Aaron couldn't help but smile as he saw Flynn struggle, knowing he was too angry with him to ask for help. After a couple of seconds, he leant towards Flynn and took hold of the seat belt and pushed it into the clip for him. Once the seat belt was done up, he looked up into Flynn's eyes. "I'm sorry ok" he said quietly "I shouldn't have behaved like that and you're right, I shouldn't have taken my bad mood out on him but it's just difficult to be enthusiastic about looking for somewhere to live when I don't want to leave where we are." Flynn nodded his head in understanding. "I get it Aaron, I do but you can't act like you just did. It's not right."

"I know. Look, I promise I'll be on my best behaviour in future. I won't embarrass you or myself like that again." Flynn's face softened as he looked at Aaron's gorgeous face. He never could stay angry with him for long. Aaron noticed the subtle change in Flynn's expression as he moved towards him and kissed him tenderly, feeling his mood start to lift as Flynn kissed him back. "So am I forgiven?" he asked when they pulled apart. "Not completely no, you don't get off the hook that easily but that's a good start" Flynn said with a smile.


	63. Chapter 63

Flynn came out of the hospital, blinking as the bright sunlight hit his eyes. He began walking through the car park and out towards the main road. As he walked, he glanced down at his now castless wrist and his unstrapped fingers. It felt strange having them free again but good at the same time. He gingerly bent and straightened his fingers a few times and was pleased to find that they didn't feel too bad. He then slowly twisted and moved his hand around to see how his wrist felt. That wasn't so good, it felt stiff and a bit achy but the nurse had reassured him that as long as he did the exercises she'd given him it would soon loosen up again. As he carried on walking, he checked his watch and saw that it had just gone half past three. Before he'd left work for his appointment, he'd told his boss that if he wasn't kept waiting too long at the hospital he would return to work but, looking at the time now, he really couldn't be bothered to go back for a couple of hours so he decided to head for home instead. Plus, after the smell that had greeted him when his cast had been removed, he wanted to get into the shower sooner rather than later. He rang Aaron to let him know he didn't need picking up from work that evening and carried on walking home enjoying the pleasant but chilly sunny day. Home, he wondered how much longer they would still be able to call it that. Four weeks had gone by since Joe had paid them that visit and they still hadn't heard anything from him about his job. He and Aaron were doing their best to try not to think about it but it was always at the back of their minds. In fact, just the other day, they'd gone back for a second time to have a look at the house where Aaron had been so rude to the letting agent. Aaron had taken a bit more interest this time. In fact, he quite liked the house, they both did. The rent was about the same as they were paying at the moment so they could afford to live there too but until they knew what was going on with Joe, they couldn't do anything. They were stuck. Flynn just wished they knew one way or the other now so they could get on with things.

As he unlocked the front door to let himself in to the house, he picked up a few letters from the doormat and, after shutting the front door again, walked into the living room. Among the junk mail was a letter addressed to Aaron which he left on the table before going upstairs to have his shower. He was in and out in no time now that he had the use of both his hands again and, with a towel wrapped round his waist, he walked into their bedroom and sat on the side of the bed. He opened the drawer of the bedside cabinet and took out the two halves of his engagement ring. Holding them both together, he was able to make them a full circle again and he gently slid it on to the third finger of his left hand. It still fitted and as he held it in place, he wished not for the first time that he could still wear it. It meant so much to him, he was proud to be engaged to Aaron and the ring was a symbol of how much they loved each other. Every time he saw Aaron wearing his, he felt a bit envious wishing he could do the same but then he would tell himself off, tell himself not to be so stupid. He had Aaron, they were together and at the end of the day that was all that mattered. Still, he did miss wearing it he thought looking down at the silver band. With a sigh, he took the broken ring off again and put the two halves back in the drawer before drying himself and getting himself dressed.

When Aaron got in from work that night, he smiled as he noticed that the place had been Flynned. That was what he called it when Flynn did the housework. It meant the rooms were spotlessly clean, everywhere was tidy, everything was in its' proper place and there was nothing lying around that shouldn't be there. He guessed by the slightly spicy smell coming from the kitchen that that was where he would find Flynn and he was right. He had his back to him as he was stirring something in a pan on the cooker. "Someone's been busy" Aaron said walking over and standing behind him, sliding his arms around his waist to cuddle him. "Yeah well I've got no excuses now the cast's gone have I?" Flynn replied, turning his head to kiss Aaron. "No, you haven't. That smells great by the way. How long til we eat? I'm starving." Flynn smiled at him. "Nothing new there then. About another ten minutes if you can wait that long." Aaron walked over to the fridge to get himself and Flynn a beer. "I think I can manage that. So, how does it feel?" he asked nodding towards Flynn's wrist. "My fingers aren't too bad but my wrist's really stiff. I've got a few exercises to do though, you know to loosen it up a bit, get it to move more freely." Aaron smirked at him. "Well I can think of something you can do to help with the up and down movement if it'll help." Flynn grinned back at him. "Yeah I bet you can, dirty sod. Anyway there's a letter for you. I left it on the table in the other room." Aaron put his beer down on the side and walked into the living room. He picked up the letter and opened it, reading the couple of sentences on the piece of paper before walking back in to Flynn. "It's er from the counsellor. I've got my first appointment next Tuesday after work." Flynn stopped what he was doing and turned to look at him. "Right, well that's good isn't it?" Aaron nodded. "Yeah, course it is. Last step in getting myself sorted isn't it. Shall I get the plates, they'll need warming up." They ate their tea and chatted about their respective days before settling down in front of the TV to watch a film. Aaron was lying down with his legs resting across Flynn's lap. He was a bit quiet and Flynn knew he was thinking about the counselling session. "You know, if you don't want to go or you don't think you need it, you can always phone and cancel the appointment. You slept pretty well the last couple of nights." Aaron looked at him. "Yeah but how long will it last? No, I need to do this." Flynn nodded. "Ok. Want me to come with you? Not into the room obviously, just so you're not there on your own." Aaron nodded. "Yeah, that'd be great. Thanks." Flynn smiled at him as he rubbed Aaron's leg gently. "No problem."

After work on Tuesday, Aaron and Flynn walked into the counsellor's waiting room. It was empty apart from one woman who was sitting reading a magazine. Aaron went over to the receptionist to book in while Flynn took a seat. When Aaron came back, he sat down next to him. "That's all I need" he said as he folded his arms and began bouncing his leg up and down "He's running late." Flynn gently put his hand on Aaron's knee to stop the movement. "Just try and relax ok. Why don't you look through a magazine til he's ready for you. Take your mind off things. " Aaron glanced down at the table in front of them and with a look of distaste on his face said "I don't think magazines about celebrities or home interiors are my thing do you? Now if they had a copy of Attitude or Men's Fitness, that'd be different. That would help take my mind off things." Flynn laughed. "Yeah I bet it would. I'm not sure how relaxed you'd be after flicking through either of them though." They fell into a comfortable silence as they waited. About ten minutes later, they heard a door open. They both looked up as they got their first look at the counsellor. He was a pleasant looking man with blue eyes, glasses, short brown hair and stubble. He was casually dressed in jeans and a shirt, open at the neck and Aaron guessed about the same age as Paddy. "Right, see you next week then" he said to the young lad who was with him. The woman who'd been reading the magazine stood up and after exchanging smiles with the counsellor, left with the lad. The counsellor smiled over at Aaron and Flynn. "Aaron Livesy?" he said. "Wish me luck" Aaron muttered as he stood up. "You won't need it. You'll be fine" Flynn said reassuringly as Aaron walked over to the counsellor. "Hi, I'm Greg" he said "You go in, I just need a quick word with the receptionist and then I'll be with you." His smile was warm as he moved out of the way so that Aaron could enter the room.

Once inside, Aaron stood and had a look around and was pleasantly surprised to see that it looked more like a living room in someone's house than some cold stark office. The pale green walls had pictures on them; there were a couple of armchairs and a small table with a box of tissues and a vase of flowers on it and in the corner, a desk with a closed laptop. Next to the laptop were a couple of files. Aaron didn't know what he'd been expecting but it wasn't this. "Sorry about that. Please have a seat." Greg's voice jolted him out of his thoughts and back to the here and now. He heard the door closing behind him as he walked over and sat down in one of the chairs. He inhaled deeply having another look around the room before watching Greg walk over to the desk and pick up one of the files. He opened it and then walked over to sit in the other chair. He smiled again at Aaron. "So, how are you today?"

"Alright I suppose, a bit nervous, I'm not a great talker."

"Neither am I, that's why I do this job. I get to listen to other people talk instead of having to do the talking myself." Aaron smiled at him and relaxed a bit further back in the chair. "A lot of people are anxious about coming for counselling so don't worry, it's a perfectly normal reaction. They have ideas of what it's going to be like, of having spotlights shone on them and being forced to speak but there's really no need to be concerned. We'll go at your pace. It may be difficult at times, it's not easy talking to a stranger especially when it comes to feelings and fears but if you're going to benefit from this, you just have to do one thing and that's be honest with me. If you are, then I'll be able to help you. If you're not, then you'll just be wasting your time and mine."

"I know. I won't do that. I was the one who went to the doctor in the first place, remember."

Greg nodded. "So I read in your referral letter and that was a brave thing to do. So many people bury their head in the sand just hoping the problem will go away and it very rarely does. Now, I know why you're here so we don't need to go into that at the moment but I don't know anything about you so why don't you tell me a bit about yourself."

Aaron crinkled his brow. "Like what? What do you want to know?"

"Just a bit of background information really. What do you do for a living? We'll start there."

"I'm a mechanic. I work in the garage in Emmerdale. It's a family business; I work with my uncle and my cousin. I've been doing it for a few years now. I like it and I like the village. Lots of my family live there or not far away and my best mate does too."

"And do you live in Emmerdale as well?"

"Not any more. I live with my boyfriend in town now. Well I say boyfriend, I should say fiancé really seeing as we're engaged but it never sounds right. That's him I was sitting with out there."

"So, how long til the big day?"

"We haven't set a date yet. We've had a lot on our plate recently but we will soon." Aaron now realised what Greg was doing. Getting him to talk about everyday stuff , things he was comfortable talking about was a way to get him to relax before they had to speak about the real issue and the funny thing was, it was working. He certainly felt more relaxed than he had a few minutes ago anyway and, going by first impressions, he felt that Greg was someone that he would be able to open up to so he gladly carried on talking for a while before Greg brought up the reason for him being there.

"So, like I said, I've had a referral letter from your GP explaining the problem but I'd like you to tell me in your own words where you think this fear has come from."

Aaron took a deep breath. Twisting his engagement ring around his finger with his right hand, he began to speak. "My boyfriend, his name's Flynn, worked with a lad called Dan. He was a little bit older than us but not much. One night, he went to bed and he never woke up again. We found out afterwards that he had a problem with his heart that hadn't been diagnosed. I can't remember the name of it now."

"It's alright. I know the condition you're talking about. Unfortunately, it is usually fit young men that it affects and no one knows there's a problem until it's too late."

"Well, I know you shouldn't speak ill of the dead but I wouldn't call Dan fit. I mean, he was ok but fit, no." Aaron shook his head. Greg couldn't help but smile. "I meant fit as in active, healthy." Aaron blushed at his mistake. "Oh, sorry I thought you meant…it doesn't matter" he said sheepishly.

"Don't be sorry. I should have chosen my words more carefully. Please, carry on."

"Well, that's it. It had never happened before then so that has to be what started it off."

"You said he worked with Flynn. Was he ok afterwards?"

"Well he had a few sleepless nights when it first happened but he soon settled back down again. I didn't. I still lie awake thinking that it could happen to me. I watch Flynn to make sure he's still breathing. It's ridiculous when you think about it."

"And was that the first time you'd experienced the death of someone around your own age?"

Aaron looked away and down at the floor. He stopped twisting his ring around his finger and folded his arms instead. In a quieter voice, he said "No." Greg instantly noticed the change in Aaron's demeanour. He didn't want to push too hard as it was the first session but he needed to know why Aaron's mood had changed so quickly. "And this other person, did the same thing happen to them?" Aaron looked back up at him and sighed. "No but in a way, I wish it had. It would have been so much better for him. At least then he wouldn't have had to go through what he went through."

"And what did he go through?"

"Hell, months and months of it. Look, do I have to talk about this?" Aaron was beginning to feel uncomfortable. He hadn't been expecting to discuss Jackson, he wasn't prepared.

Greg shook his head. "No not if you don't want to, but it makes my job easier if I've got as much information as possible." He waited and watched. He could almost see the battle going on in Aaron's mind as he was trying to make up his mind what to do. After a few seconds, Aaron began speaking again. "Jackson was my first boyfriend. He was driving his van one night and it er it left the road and ended up on the train tracks where it was hit by a train. When I got to him, I thought he was dead. It was touch and go for a while but somehow he survived except he was left a tetraplegic." Aaron paused as long buried memories and images returned to him. "Anyway, when he eventually left hospital, we got on with our lives, made the best of things until one day, he got a really bad chest infection. The doctors at the hospital tried to treat it but by this time, he was too weak to fight it off and he died." Aaron sniffed and averted his eyes as he wiped away a tear that was trickling down his cheek.

"That must have been a very difficult time for you."

"Difficult" Aaron scoffed "You have no idea. If it wasn't for Flynn, I don't know what I'd have done and that's the truth. He was brilliant with me. If I wanted to talk, which wasn't very often, then he'd listen and if I didn't want to talk, then that was ok too. He really looked after me, made me see that it was possible to be happy again, to love someone again." Aaron watched as Greg jotted down some notes. "So, can you sort my head out or not?" he asked. Greg closed the file and put it on the table in front of them.

"In most people Aaron, fears or phobias can be conquered. In some people however, they never go away completely but they can definitely be controlled enough not to take over their lives. I can certainly help you get your fear under control. Believe it or not, you're not the first person I've seen who's suffering like you are and I'm sure you won't be the last."

"What do we do now then?"

"We need to talk some more, go into detail on a few more things and then we'll take it from there. I'd like you to come back same time next week if that's ok with you." Aaron nodded his head. "Yeah, that's fine." They said goodbye and Aaron walked out of the office. Flynn watched Aaron's face as he walked towards him but it wasn't giving much away. "Ok?" he asked. "Yeah, I'm fine. Let's go." They walked back to the car in silence and Aaron got in to the driver's seat. They'd been travelling for a few minutes before Flynn spoke again. "So, how was it?" Aaron glanced at him before looking back at the road ahead. "It was ok but maybe he was going easy on me because it was the first session. I'm going back same time next week for round two so ask me again then." Flynn didn't press for any more information. As long as Aaron was ok, that was all he needed to know.

It didn't take too long for them to get home and Aaron left Flynn to order a takeaway for their tea while he grabbed a quick shower. After they'd eaten, Flynn cleared everything away and began to load the dishwasher. When he'd finished, he called through to Aaron "Do you want another drink while I'm in here?" He waited but got no reply. He looked at Aaron who appeared to be watching the TV. "Aaron, do you want a drink?" Still there was no reply. With a look of slight concern on his face, he walked into the living room. "Hey, earth to Aaron, come in Aaron." Aaron turned his head towards him. "What? Sorry, I was miles away." Flynn sat down next to him. "So I saw. What's up?"

"Nothing. I was just thinking."

"About the counselling?"

Aaron shook his head. "Funnily enough, no. What's there to think about? It's just something I've got to do."

Flynn smiled at him. "So, if it's not the counselling, then what is it?"

"Actually, I was thinking about me and you and getting married."

"Oh, right." That wasn't what Flynn had been expecting to hear at all. He wondered what was coming next. "What about it?"

"It's just we haven't spoken about it in ages, I can barely remember the last time we even mentioned it and well, we both know what I've done since then, what we went through." Aaron turned towards Flynn so he could face him. "I need to know if you want us to just stay as we are for the foreseeable future, not make any definite plans for a wedding or if you're ready to get things moving and set a date like I am."

Flynn stared at his perfect man, gazed into Aaron's perfect eyes as his words sank in. He licked his lips which had gone dry. "Am I ready?" His face broke out into a massive grin. "Aaron, I've been ready for longer than you can imagine. What happened hasn't changed that one bit. I can't wait to start looking at places to have the wedding, to set a date, go shopping for suits, for the rings. Nothing would make me happier." Aaron's grin mirrored Flynn's as they hugged each other tightly. "I can't believe you thought I'd want to wait even longer" Flynn said as they separated. "Yeah well I hoped you wouldn't but I didn't want to just assume." Aaron put his hand behind the cushion on the sofa and said "Talking of rings, this is for you." Flynn took the small box from Aaron and opened it. "It's exactly the same as the original" Aaron continued "even down to the engraving on the inside. I know you were upset when the hospital had to cut yours off and I can tell although you haven't said anything that you miss wearing it. I've seen your face when you go to your finger to touch it then realise it's not there anymore. I just hope your finger's the same size as it was before you broke it." His eyes blurred with tears of happiness, Flynn took the ring out of its box and slid it onto his finger. It fitted perfectly. He wiped his eyes before looking up at Aaron. "I can't believe you did this or that you noticed how much I missed wearing the other one."

"Where you're concerned, believe me I notice and well I know how I'd feel if anything ever happened to mine."

Flynn leant forward and kissed Aaron tenderly, a slow gentle kiss that neither was in a hurry to finish. When their lips eventually parted, Flynn cuddled into Aaron as Aaron put his arm around him, holding him close. "Thank you for my ring" Flynn said quietly." Aaron kissed the top of Flynn's head. "My pleasure" he replied.


	64. Chapter 64

Aaron checked his watch, sighed and bent over the engine of the car again. The garage was unbelievably busy. He and Cain had been working flat out all morning, stopping only briefly to grab a sandwich and a drink for their lunch. Now, with only a couple of hours to go until he had to leave to get to his counselling session, he had to finish the car he was working on and change the brake pads on another car that was waiting for him. He concentrated hard, he didn't have time for mistakes, not today, so he was slightly annoyed when he heard his mobile ringing, disturbing his train of thought. He toyed with the idea of not answering it but something made him stop and take it out of his pocket. He looked at the name on the screen and answered it quickly. The conversation only lasted a couple of minutes and, when it was over, Aaron put his phone back in his pocket, smiled and shouted "Yes! Thank you, thank you, thank you." Cain who was walking towards him at that moment with a mug of tea in each hand said "Alright, it's only a brew no need to go overboard with your gratitude." Aaron pulled a face as he took the mug that Cain held out to him. "So, come on then, what's put a smile on your ugly mug?" Cain asked. "Just had a call from Joe. His job's safe so me and Flynn won't have to move out of the house after all." Cain sniffed and stared at Aaron. "Oh right. Great. I'm happy for you." Aaron looked at him confused by his flat reaction. "Well if that's how you look when you're happy for me, I'd hate to see how you look when you're not." Cain scratched his cheek and sighed. "Look, I'm pleased for you, I really am. You and lover boy can stay put and live happily ever after now, that's brilliant, but for how long? What happens if in a few months, you get another phone call and you find yourselves in the same situation again?" Aaron's euphoria began to subside as Cain's words began to register. "I mean his job's safe for now yeah but that could all change and if it does, do you really want to go through all this aggro again? I'm just saying if it was me, I'd give some serious thought to finding somewhere else to live, somewhere where you won't be dreading getting a phone call telling you you've got to move out."

"But we love living there."

"Course you do, it's your home but it's not really the house itself you love is it, that's just bricks and mortar. What you love about it is living there together, you and him surrounded by your stuff and your memories and let's face it, you can have that anywhere. Look, it's not my place to tell you what to do, not that you'd listen to me anyway. I just think it might be worth you two having a chat about it, that's all." Aaron nodded his head. He'd been so relieved to hear Joe say that they could stay in the house that he'd never thought about the fact that it might happen again at some point and he was pretty sure Flynn hadn't either. "Right." Cain stood up and began to walk over to the car he was working on. "Can't sit here gassing to you all day." Aaron smiled. "Hey!" he called out. Cain turned to look at him. "Thanks, for, well you know." Aaron stumbled over his words. Cain half smiled. "Don't worry about it. Now get back to work. I need them motors finished before you go. Clock's ticking."

Flynn arrived home from work that evening humming a tune to himself. He was in one of those count your blessings type of moods. On the way home from work, he'd been thinking about his life and he'd come to the conclusion that it was just about perfect. He had a job that he enjoyed doing, he had a close family and circle of friends and of course he had Aaron. His gorgeous, funny, sexy as hell Aaron who he adored and who adored him just as much in return. He couldn't wait to marry him providing, of course, they could find a venue that they both liked. They'd been to the Registry Office and it was ok but it was just that, ok. The Guildhall was better but it still didn't feel quite right. They were hopeful however that a venue they'd be seeing in a few weeks time would be the one that would grab them both and make them go, yeah, this is the place. Neither of them could believe they'd had to wait that long to even see it but it would be worth it if they both liked it. Still humming to himself, he changed out of his suit into something a bit more comfortable and waited for Aaron to return. On hearing the front door open and close, he put down the magazine he'd been looking through and turned towards the door that led in from the hall, smiling when he saw Aaron. "Alright? You're back early." Aaron dropped his keys on the table without saying anything. "How did it go?" Aaron looked at him and still without speaking walked into the kitchen. "That good, eh?" Flynn said quietly to himself. He heard the fridge door slam shut and Aaron returned with a can of lager. He opened it and flopped down on the sofa. "It's ok, I didn't want one anyway" Flynn said, smiling. "Well, you know where the fridge is if you do" Aaron replied sarcastically. Flynn looked away and Aaron instantly felt guilty. He leant forward and put his can on the table before turning towards Flynn. "I'm sorry. It's just that today's session didn't go very well and I ended up losing my temper."

"Oh Aaron you didn't."

"I couldn't help it. He kept banging on about Jackson all the time. Question after question after question and I just had enough so I told him I wasn't going to talk about him anymore and there was nothing he could do to make me." Aaron dropped his eyes unable to look at Flynn any longer and in a quieter voice said "and then I walked out."

"You did what?" Flynn raised his voice slightly. "Why would you do that? He's only trying to help you." Aaron kept his eyes cast downwards. "You promised me Aaron you'd do this."

"I know" Aaron looked up at Flynn "which is why I only got as far as the toilets. I splashed some cold water on my face, calmed down and went back and apologised." Flynn looked at him slightly surprised. "What did he say when you went back?"

"Not a lot. He wasn't happy. He said he appreciated me coming back to say sorry but he thought it was for the best if we just left it for tonight. That's why I was home early."

"So what now?"

"I go back Monday afternoon and we try again. Cain won't be happy with me having to take time off, not with how busy we are but.." He didn't finish his sentence, he just shrugged his shoulders. Flynn shook his head. "You're an idiot at times, you know that."

"Tell me something I don't know."

"Well at least you went back. That took some guts. Come here." Flynn held out his arms and Aaron happily leant into Flynn's embrace, putting his arms around him and holding him tightly. They held each other for a few seconds before Aaron pulled back. Flynn knew instantly by his face that they hadn't finished speaking. "There's something else isn't there? What is it?"

Aaron began by telling him about Joe's phone call before moving on to what Cain had said afterwards while Flynn listened without interrupting. "So what do you think?" Aaron asked.

"Well, I never thought of it like that before but he's got a point hasn't he? Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad idea to live somewhere else, somewhere where we know exactly where we stand. I mean these weeks of waiting for Joe to phone have been awful. I wouldn't fancy going through it again to be honest."

"I know, me either. So you wouldn't mind living somewhere else then?"

"No, I don't think I would. It might even be fun, starting again somewhere else. As long as we're living together, I'm happy. What about you?"

"When Cain first mentioned it, I didn't want to but the more I've been thinking about it, the more it makes sense. I'll be sorry to leave this place, it being our first home together and all that but we have to do what's right for us I suppose and we can't be living in fear of the phone ringing in case it's Joe with bad news."

"I agree but we don't have to make a decision right now. We can think about it for a while." Aaron smiled gratefully at him. "No, Cain's right. As much as we love living here, it is just a house and I think we both know finding somewhere else is the right thing to do. What about Joe though?"

"I'm sure he'll understand. He'll probably just do what he was going to do in the first place, let it through an agent. We have to do what's best for us Aaron."

"I know. I'll phone him tomorrow and tell him. Can't say I'm looking forward to trawling round properties again though, not after some of the places we saw last time."

"Maybe we won't have to. What about that house with the garage that we saw on that new estate? You know, the one you quite liked once we went back and you had a proper look at it."

"I bet that'll be taken by now."

"Not necessarily." Flynn got up and fetched the laptop and searched the letting agent's website. They both smiled when they saw it was still there. "See, Mr Pessimistic. So why don't we call them tomorrow and speak to them about it and then we can call Joe."

"Ok, but I'm not speaking to that agent. You can talk to him. He likes you. He doesn't like me."

"I wonder why that is?" Flynn said laughing.

"Hey, I was nice to him. Well, the second time I was anyway."

"Right, I think that's enough serious stuff for one evening." Flynn closed the laptop and put it on the table. "Let's go out, grab a pizza, go to the cinema, anything you want to do I don't care. Let's just go and have some fun."

"Sounds good." Aaron leant forward and kissed Flynn. "Just give me a few minutes to get changed and I'll be right with you."

Four weeks later, early on a Saturday morning, Aaron and Flynn were sitting in their living room, surrounded by lots and lots of boxes. It was moving day, the day they were going to move out of Joe's house and into their new one. Joe had taken the news really well when Aaron had phoned him. He'd said that he completely understood and would probably have done the same thing had he been in Aaron and Flynn's position which made them both feel better. They had collected the keys to the new house and now they were just waiting for their team of helpers to arrive. Cain had closed the garage for the day and had managed to get hold of a couple of vans for them to use. There was also Adam, Paddy, Flynn's dad and his brother. "You ok?" Aaron asked, placing his hand on Flynn's leg and giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"Yeah, a bit sad to be leaving here but excited about the new place. How about you?"

"The same. I just want to get on with it now."

Before Flynn could reply, there was a knock on the door. Aaron went to open it and let in Flynn's dad and brother. Just as he was about to close it again, he saw the vans pull up, one driven by Cain, the other driven by Paddy. "You better not have packed that kettle away, we need a brew before we start." Adam grinned at Aaron as he walked up the path. "And a bacon butty would be great. I haven't had any breakfast."

"Does this place look like a café?" Aaron asked as Adam walked past him.

"Oh come on mate, I'm starving. I'm wasting away here."

"I very much doubt that pal."

"He's not still going on about being hungry is he?" Paddy said. "He hasn't stopped since I picked him up. He's like a stuck record."

"Actually, I could just eat a bacon butty now" Cain said.

"Yeah, me too" Harrison chimed in.

Aaron and Flynn looked at each other. Flynn shrugged leaving the decision up to Aaron. "Right, come on then" Aaron sighed "We'll go to that café in town before we get started otherwise we'll never hear the end of it."

"Yes, good lad. I knew you'd see sense." Adam put his arm around Aaron's shoulder and pulled him against him.

"Get off." Aaron shrugged him away playfully as they all left the house.

A short while later, after everyone had had enough to eat, they made their way back to Aaron and Flynn's house ready to finally start moving their things. Aaron and Flynn had come up with a plan, well, Flynn had really which he thought would help to make the move go more smoothly. He was going to take a few of the small boxes in his car to the new house and then stay there so that he would be able to let everyone know where to put things when they got there. Aaron had teased him when he'd suggested it, saying he'd only mentioned it to get out of doing the real work but he knew it made sense because Flynn was far better at organising things than he was. Once a couple of the boxes had been put into Flynn's car, he set off leaving the others to load up the vans. It was hard work and the day was a warm, sunny one. By the time the vans pulled up at the new house, Adam, Aaron and Harrison had already taken off their t shirts in an effort to stay cool. Flynn went out to help and soon had his t shirt off too. He tried not to stare at Aaron too much as they passed each other but with his tanned torso and bulging biceps on display it wasn't easy.

"I'd offer to lend you a hand but it looks like you've got enough help." Flynn looked up to see a man a few years older than him standing in the garden next door. " Yeah we're ok but thanks anyway" he said walking over to their new neighbour. "I'm Flynn by the way." The man smiled. "Tom. So is it just you moving in?" Flynn shook his head. "No me and one other." He looked around for Aaron and saw him coming out of the house. He called him over to introduce him. "You'll have to come round for a few drinks one night when you're settled in" Tom continued "Me and the wife can fill you in on the neighbours, you know, who's ok, who likes a good moan that sort of thing." Aaron and Flynn laughed. "Cheers that could be useful" Aaron said. "Right well I'll leave you to it. See you soon." Aaron and Flynn returned to moving their stuff in and a few minutes later, Aaron and Adam had just carried the parts of a double bed upstairs and were on their way downstairs again when Aaron glanced into the living room. He stopped in his tracks. Flynn was crouched down on the floor by the TV with his back to him. His shorts gaped slightly at the back, showing the top of his underwear and Aaron couldn't help but admire how great his arse looked in that position. "Better wind that tongue in Livesy or you'll trip over it" Adam laughed as he walked past him and back out to the van. Flynn turned to see Aaron staring at him and smiled. He was glad he wasn't the only one struggling to keep his mind on shifting furniture.

After a very long day, the house finally looked like a house, not like a storage depot and Flynn and Aaron were pleased. It was already beginning to feel like home. Flynn's dad and brother were the first to leave so after they'd said their goodbyes, Aaron ordered pizza for everyone who was left while Flynn threw on his t shirt again and drove to get some more beer. It was the least they could do to say thank you to everyone for all their help. Flynn got back before the pizza arrived so he handed round some drinks before sitting down next to Aaron who'd also put his t shirt back on. "I don't think it's a good idea that you two sit together, not after the way you've been perving over each other all day. You'll put me off my food." Adam just couldn't resist teasing.

"You're just jealous cos it wasn't you I was looking at" Aaron replied.

" Yeah well I'm just pleased it wasn't me either of you were looking at" Cain chipped in.

"Who said I wasn't looking?" Flynn said with a grin. "No harm in looking."

"Not if it's something worth looking at, no but he doesn't have anything worth looking at" Aaron sneered.

The sound of a knock on the door stopped the conversation from going any further. Aaron answered it and took the pizza boxes from the delivery man and handed them to Flynn while he picked up his wallet and went to pay. They ate like they hadn't been fed in days, making short work of the massive pizzas. "Right, who's for another drink?" Flynn asked, looking round at everyone. They all either nodded or said yes as he stood up to go into the kitchen. "I'll give you a hand" Aaron said getting up and following him. Once they were out of sight and earshot of everyone, Flynn turned around and pulled Aaron towards him. "Do you realise, we haven't been on our own at all today?" he asked as he walked backwards until he made contact with one of the cupboards. He put his arms around Aaron's waist and pulled him into a kiss. Aaron put his arms around Flynn's neck and kissed him back, enjoying the feel of his boyfriend pressed close against him. "I wish they'd all just go home now" Aaron murmured as he nuzzled into Flynn's neck. "That's not very hospitable is it, especially after all their help today" Flynn said. Aaron kissed Flynn's neck a couple of times before pulling back and staring into Flynn's eyes. "Well maybe I don't feel very hospitable right now" he said quietly. "So how do you feel?" Flynn asked, his heartbeat quickening. He could feel Aaron's breath against his skin as Aaron put his mouth close to his ear. With a husky tone to his voice, he whispered "Like I want to carry on kissing you and never stop. Like I want to take all your clothes off and kiss every inch of your body. Then I want you to do the same to me and, when you have, when we're both really turned on, I want to slowly…"

Flynn groaned and let his head fall forward onto Aaron's shoulder. "Don't say another word."

"Well you did ask" Aaron said with a smile as his and Flynn's eyes met.

"How long does it take to grab a few beers? We dying of thirst out here." Cain's voice broke the mood between them.

"Can't have that now can we?" Aaron said, quickly kissing Flynn again. They went back out to the others with the drinks and handed them out but as they all continued to talk, Aaron and Flynn were both unable to stop thinking about what Aaron had said in the kitchen. They caught each other's eye on numerous occasions, shared smiles, both wishing they were on their own so they could make what Aaron had said a reality. Every minute they had to wait was torture for them until eventually, just when it was getting to the point of being unbearable, Paddy said "Right, I think it's time we were getting back." Aaron and Flynn could have kissed him, they were so pleased that they were shortly going to be on their own. Everyone stood up and after hugging Aaron and Flynn, they all left. Flynn closed the front door and came into the living room to find Aaron standing exactly where he'd been a few moments ago. "Finally we're on our own" Flynn smirked as he walked towards Aaron's waiting arms. He wrapped his arms around him as they kissed; an initial tender kiss soon escalating into long, hard hungry kisses fuelled by their mutual desire for each other. They clung to each other for a few minutes, their bodies pressed together and without their lips separating, Flynn manoeuvred Aaron backwards towards the sofa and pushed him down on to it. Barely pausing for breath, he pulled his t shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor before sitting astride Aaron, placing his hands on either side of his face and kissing him again. Aaron moaned and sighed as Flynn's tongue rubbed against his own as they continued to devour the other one's mouth with hot, sloppy kisses. Flynn virtually tore Aaron's t shirt from his body, not that Aaron was complaining. He needed to feel Flynn's naked chest pressed against his own, their bodies moving in a rhythm together as they became more and more aroused. Aaron's hands roamed over Flynn's back and torso as he teased Flynn's nipples with his tongue. Suddenly, Flynn pulled away leaving a stunned and breathless Aaron staring at him wondering what he was doing. He got off Aaron's lap, moved back slightly and stood looking down at him watching Aaron's chest quickly rising and falling before allowing his eyes to wander downwards to Aaron's very obvious erection.

Without saying a word, he undid his own shorts and slid them down over his hips taking his underwear down at the same time, freeing himself of all constraints. After removing his trainers, he held out his hand to Aaron who allowed himself to be pulled up off the sofa. Like metal is drawn to a magnet, Aaron's hand moved automatically to take hold of Flynn's fully erect penis, stroking it a few times as they kissed again. Flynn groaned into the kiss and began to fumble with Aaron's shorts, pulling them down towards his ankles, his boxer shorts quickly following. He crouched down to take them off completely along with his trainers and looked up into Aaron's pleading eyes, Aarons own erect penis just centimetres from his face. He took hold of it and without breaking eye contact, slid his mouth up and down the full length a couple of times before concentrating his attention on the super sensitive head and tip. Aaron couldn't stop himself from crying out, his head falling backwards as he placed his hands on the back of Flynn's head. This was torture for him. On the one hand, he wanted Flynn to continue, to carry on making him feel the way he was feeling right now but he knew that if Flynn did, it would all be over before they'd really got started. As if Flynn could read his mind, he suddenly released him and stood up again, kissing him hard. They tumbled backwards onto the sofa and once again, Flynn sat astride Aaron. This time nothing was in the way as their hot sweaty bodies writhed against each other. It was rough, almost animalistic, but neither of them cared. They were too far gone to think about anything except the overwhelming pleasure that was coursing through them. "Jesus Flynn, I'm really close" Aaron gasped. "I know, me too but I need you to hold on just a bit longer." Flynn stopped moving and kissed Aaron as tenderly as he could manage, giving both of them a precious few seconds to calm down a bit before raising himself up and taking hold of Aaron's penis, positioning it so that he could take it inside him. Once it was fully inserted he kissed Aaron again. "Now you can come whenever you want" he murmured. Aaron held onto Flynn's hips as he began to move up and down, taking both of them closer and closer to the edge. After a few minutes, Aaron cried out and Flynn felt him explode inside him. Not long afterwards and with a bit of help from Aaron, he experienced his own orgasm. Crying out, he fell forward against Aaron. They held each other close as they waited to come down from their high, for their breathing and their heart rate to return to normal.

Some time later, they were lying on their sides on the sofa, Aaron's back resting against Flynn's stomach, Flynn's arm draped around Aaron's waist, his hand resting against Aaron's abs. Not one word had passed between them, none were needed not after what they'd just experienced so they lay in a blissful, contented silence enjoying the feeling of closeness that had enveloped them both. Flynn moved his head and gently kissed Aaron's shoulder a couple of times. "You make me unbelievably happy" he whispered. Unseen by Flynn, Aaron smiled. "You make me unbelievably happy too. In fact" he said turning himself round to face Flynn "The only way I could be any happier is if I was marrying you tomorrow." Flynn smiled at him. "Well, after our appointment tomorrow, we should be a step closer to knowing when our wedding will be."

"You do know we probably can't afford to get married there don't you?" Aaron placed his hand on Flynn's chest and gently stroked the smooth skin.

"I know but at least we'll have asked the question and we won't have to spend our lives wondering if we could have afforded it."

Aaron nodded his head. "It would just be perfect if we could afford it though. We've got a lot of special memories of that pIace already. Our first anniversary for one."

Flynn nodded. "It was where you danced with me for the first time."

Aaron raised his eyes to the ceiling and smiled. "Don't remind me."

"Why not, you were ok once you relaxed a bit."

"Hmm, if you say so. And of course then there was what happened after we stopped dancing."

"Trust you to bring that up."

"Yeah well that's because after that night, our relationship was different somehow. Something happened to us, between us, that night. Our connection to each other, what we felt, it changed forever." Aaron shook his head. "I'm not making much sense am I? I know what I'm trying to say but I can't find the right words."

Flynn gazed into Aaron's sparkling blue eyes. They looked bluer and more stunning than ever and for a few seconds, he completely lost himself in them. "You don't have to. I know exactly what you mean."

"Do you?"

Flynn nodded his head. "I do." Aaron reached up and gently traced his fingers along Flynn's jaw. "I love you" he said as he pulled Flynn towards him and kissed him tenderly. "I love you too. I always have and I always will" Flynn declared. They continued to leisurely kiss each other stopping before things got too heated between them and making their way up to bed. This time they wanted to take their time when they made love, which they did before falling asleep in each others arms.


	65. Chapter 65

When Aaron and Flynn woke up the next morning, they were both surprised to see how late it was. All that physical activity yesterday moving house and in the bedroom when they'd finally made it upstairs had obviously taken more out of them than they'd realised. They lay in their warm, comfortable bed knowing they had to get up but their bodies didn't want to co- operate. Aaron nudged Flynn gently for the second time. "If we don't make a move soon, we're going to be late."

"I know, just a couple more minutes" Flynn murmured rolling over onto his side and snuggling down under the duvet.

"That's what you said five minutes ago and you're still here."

"Well I don't see you making an effort to get up."

"I'll get up when you do."

Flynn sighed, sat up and swung his legs out of bed before looking over his shoulder to see Aaron watching him. "You've got two minutes. If you're not out of bed when I get back, you'll regret it" he said standing up, pulling the duvet off Aaron as he did so. He went to the bathroom and returned a couple of minutes later to see that Aaron hadn't moved a muscle. He was exactly where he'd left him, his eyes closed again as he lay relaxing. He hadn't even bothered to pull the duvet back up over him. With a grin forming on his face, Flynn crept round to Aaron's side of the bed. From behind his back he produced a glass of water and proceeded to slowly tip the contents onto Aaron's bare chest and stomach before darting back to the relative safety of the other side of the room. Aaron's eyes shot open and he jumped about a foot off the bed as the cold water landed on him. "What the.. what did you do that for?" he spluttered looking down as the water dripped down his body.

"I warned you that you'd regret it if you were still lying there but did you listen to me? No."

Aaron pulled a face before finally dragging himself out of bed. "You are so going to pay for this" he stated.

"Oh I'm sure I will just not now ok. We really need to get a move on."

"That's fine by me. Gives me longer to plot my revenge" Aaron said with a glint in his eyes.

A couple of hours later, Aaron and Flynn walked back across the gravel car park of the hotel and got into their car. "I can't believe we've finally got a date for our wedding" Flynn said excitedly, putting the key in the ignition.

"Well believe it because we have and the best bit is we've only got to wait six months for it to happen. I thought we'd have to wait a lot longer than that to get married here."

"And we would have done if they hadn't have had that birthday party cancellation." Flynn looked at Aaron and grinned at him. "What?" Aaron asked.

"You. You're quite the wheeler dealer aren't you? Getting us our room and breakfast for nothing and a free pass to the spa too."

"Yeah well for what we're spending here, that was the least she could do."

"I did think you were pushing your luck though when you started talking about the prices of the rooms and was there any chance of getting them at a cheaper rate for people who want to stay here after the wedding. I couldn't believe it when she said yes."

"Well if you don't ask you don't get. Besides it makes sense if you think about it. They need to fill the rooms and if people want a drink, which they usually do at a wedding, they need somewhere to stay so they drop their price a bit and people will be more willing to stay here. It's not rocket science is it?"

"No, that's true. The old Livesy charm works its magic again."

"Shut it you. It's such a relief to know that we can afford to get married here. It wouldn't have felt right doing it somewhere else."

"I know. We will be able to get it all organised in time though won't we?" Flynn asked turning in his seat to look at Aaron. A confused look crossed Aaron's face. "Course we will. What is there to sort out? The wedding organiser here is going to be doing most of the work. All we need to do is get new suits and the wedding rings."

"And the invitations."

"Ok, the suits, the wedding rings and the invitations.

"And the buttonholes for everyone who needs one."

"And the button holes" Aaron conceded rolling his eyes.

"Oh and the wedding cake. I mean we need to decide if we want to go traditional and have a fruit one or maybe one that's mainly fruit but one tier is sponge because some people don't like fruit cake do they or maybe we should go for something completely different like cupcakes, they seem to be really popular at the moment."

"Flynn" Aaron interrupted, gently pressing his finger against Flynn's lips. "Enough ok?" he said with a smile. He took his finger away and Flynn looked at him a bit sheepishly. "Sorry, just thinking out loud. We haven't got that much time and I just want it all to be perfect."

"And it will be. You're the most organised person I know. Everything will be fine I'm sure of it. Look, see this ring" he said holding up his left hand "At the end of the day, as long as it's replaced with a gold one and I go to bed in that fancy room they've given us with my husband, not my boyfriend, then as far as I'm concerned, it will have been perfect." Flynn looked into Aaron's amazing blue eyes and felt so much love for him that it briefly overwhelmed him. Unable to speak, he leant forward and kissed him tenderly on the lips, something he never tired of doing. "So, do you fancy stopping off in the village to tell everyone our news?" Aaron asked reaching for his seat belt. "Yeah, ok then. We might as well do my parents on the way back" Flynn replied putting his own seat belt on. As Flynn started the car and drove off, Aaron tutted and shook his head slowly from side to side. "Cupcakes" he said disdainfully, glancing across at Flynn.

"Not keen?" Flynn asked, a small smile on his face.

"What, on posh fairy cakes? What do you think? I have had an idea about the cake though. We could ask Marlon to make it for us and have it as his wedding present to us. It'll save us getting a toaster or something else from him that we don't need. "

"Wow, you're really on a roll today aren't you? Do you think he'd do it?"

"Course he would and it's one less thing we'll have to pay for."

"Not just a pretty face are you?"

"I'm not a pretty face at all. Handsome, good looking, fit, yeah but not pretty and definitely not cute either before you say it."

About half an hour later, Flynn parked the car outside Paddy's house and they knocked on the door just in case he was in. They weren't overly surprised when there was no answer so they strolled down towards the pub where they found him sitting with Chas. "Well this is a nice surprise. I thought you two would be getting settled in to your new place today" Chas said standing up to hug Aaron and Flynn.

"We had somewhere we had to be" Aaron replied.

"Blimey, it must have been important for you to have got up and out of the house on a Sunday morning" Paddy said. Before Aaron and Flynn could reply, Adam wandered over. "Alright boys. You never said you were dropping in today" he said.

"That's cos we only decided a little while ago. We've got some news."

"Good or bad?" Chas asked.

"Good, definitely good. We've just booked our wedding. It's going to be at The Shires Hotel September the twenty fourth this year so get it in your diaries."

Chas squealed and clapped her hands together, unable to help herself. "Aww, that's brilliant love. September, eh? You're not hanging about. That'll be here before you know it."

"Don't you start. This one's already panicking over getting it all sorted in time." Aaron nodded towards Flynn who blushed slightly.

"Paddy, get them a drink. I want to hear all about it" Chas said. Paddy got up and asked Adam what he wanted before going up to the bar. Aaron, Flynn and Adam sat down with Chas.

"So, you had any thoughts about who you want for your best man then?" Adam asked "Actually, thinking about it, how does that work? Do you have one each or what?"

"I suppose we can have one each if we want" Flynn said.

"Or we might not have any. I don't really know if I need one to be honest" Aaron said looking at Adam.

"Oh right." Adam couldn't keep the disappointment out of his voice until he saw Aaron start to smile. "That was a joke right?"

"Course it was a joke. I can't get married without my best friend by my side can I?"

Adam grinned. "Ah nice one pal. You know I won't let you down, not on the day or on your stag do. I'm going to organise the best stag do ever. I'll make sure you never forget it. I'm thinking a weekend away somewhere, I'm thinking lots of alcohol and very little sleep." He laughed, then remembered Flynn was sitting there listening. "But of course it goes without saying that it won't be too outrageous. I'll make sure he comes back to you in one piece Flynn I promise."

"I'm sure he'll be in safe hands."

Chas leaned over and whispered in Adam's ear "Good recovery." As word spread around the pub about Aaron and Flynn's wedding date, people came over to speak to them; some dropping subtle hints about hoping they'd be invited, some dropping not so subtle hints but Aaron and Flynn took it all in their stride. Even the prospect of having Pearl say she wanted a dance with them and wouldn't take no for an answer couldn't dampen their spirits. After a couple of hours, they left the village to visit Flynn's family and tell them their good news. It was greeted with the same joy and delight as they'd experienced in the village. Once they'd returned home, there was only one more person to tell. Hazel squealed nearly as loudly as Chas had done and promised them that wild horses wouldn't keep her away and she was going to look at flights that very day.

Over the next few weeks, Aaron and Flynn began to make plans for their wedding. They went looking for suits and rings and invitations and it was while returning from one of their shopping trips that they saw Tom washing his car. They spoke for a while and Tom asked whether they wanted to come round on the Friday evening for that drink they'd spoken about. Aaron and Flynn happily accepted the invitation and when Tom went back into his house, he told his wife Lucy what he'd arranged. "Sounds great" she said "I was talking to Flynn yesterday myself but it completely slipped my mind." She went into the kitchen to check on their dinner.

"Yay. Aaron and Flynn are coming round" a cheerful little voice piped up. Tom smiled at their seven year old daughter Mollie who was sitting at the table in the living room swinging her legs as she drew a picture.

"Yes they are. You like Aaron and Flynn don't you?" Tom asked ruffling her curly brown hair. She nodded enthusiastically. "They always talk to me if I'm in the garden and Aaron pulls really funny faces and makes me laugh. Can I stay up a bit later on Friday to see them? Pleeease" she pleaded. Tom's daughter could wrap him round her little finger and they both knew it.

"Alright but just a little bit later and when we say it's time for bed, no arguing ok?"

She grinned as she grabbed a clean piece of paper. "Ok. Thank you Daddy. You're the best Daddy in the world."

Tom kissed the top of his daughter's head and followed his wife into the kitchen. "Looks like Aaron and Flynn have got a fan" he said with a smile.

"Looks like it. I know we don't know them very well at the moment but they're very good with her and they seem like nice lads."

"Yeah they do. Since they moved in, they've been very well behaved. There's been no parties, no really loud music played at two or three in the morning, no streams of girls traipsing in and out."

"I don't think there'll ever be streams of girls going in and out of that house."

"Why, do you think they've both got serious girlfriends then?"

"Not exactly." She dried her hands on a t-towel and looked at Tom. "You haven't noticed their rings have you?"

"What rings?"

"Aaron and Flynn have got matching rings on their wedding fingers. I noticed them the other day when I was talking to them and they told me they'd lived together before moving here. I think they might be a couple."

Tom looked at his wife as if she had two heads. "A couple? Aaron and Flynn? What, as in gay?" Lucy shushed him aware that their daughter was in the other room. "Sorry but that's the most ridiculous thing I've heard in a long time. Just because they're wearing similar rings and shared a house, you think they're gay?" he said in a quieter voice. "No, no chance. There's no way Aaron and Flynn are gay."

"Why? Because they don't sound like Alan Carr or look like Freddie Mercury."

"No, course not. It's just I can't see it that's all. There's absolutely nothing about them that says they're gay."

"Not all gay men stand out in a crowd you know."

"I know that, it's just….nah, I'm sorry I don't see it."

"Well maybe I've got it wrong but if I haven't, would it be a problem?

"Of course it wouldn't. You know me better than that. What they do in the privacy of their own home is up to them isn't it? I just wouldn't want to see them doing what they do with my own eyes if you know what I mean."

Lucy nodded. "Well, somehow I don't think that would be a problem. If they are gay, then I'm pretty sure they're used to being discreet. I mean, some people still have a major problem with it don't they?" Tom nodded. "Anyway, like I said, maybe I've got it wrong." She walked past her husband and back out into the living room. Tom followed a few seconds later. He sat down next to his wife and looked at the news which was on TV. A few minutes later, they heard their daughter say "Finished" as she proudly waved a bit of paper at them. "Come and look at my picture I did for Aaron and Flynn." They both got up to have a look at the drawing and what they saw shocked and surprised them in equal measures. The picture was of two people, one with short black hair and blue eyes, the other one with brown hair and dark eyes. They were standing on some grass holding hands and they were surrounded by little red hearts. Tom and his wife looked at each other, neither really knowing what to say.

"Aaron's this one" Mollie said pointing to the figure with the blue eyes.

"I can see that" Tom said "Why are they holding hands and what's with all the hearts around them?"

"It's because they love each other, silly" she said with a giggle.

"What makes you say that sweetheart?" Lucy asked.

"Cos I saw them kissing."

The words hung in the air for a couple of seconds as Tom and Lucy looked at each other. Tom crouched down so he was more on his daughter's level. "When did you see them do that?" he asked, keeping his voice gentle.

"The other day."

"Are you absolutely sure that's what you saw? This isn't another one of your stories is it?" Their daughter had a very vivid imagination and often told them things she said she'd seen or heard but hadn't. Their daughter shook her head. "No, I saw them. Aaron and Flynn were in their garden and Flynn kissed Aaron like you kiss Mummy when you come in from work."

Tom glanced at his wife, his face serious. It was one thing for him and his wife to know about homosexuality but in his opinion, his little girl was far too young to be exposed to it.

"And where were you when you saw them?" Lucy asked. "Were you in the garden?"

"No. I was in my room looking out of the window. I waved at them but they didn't see me." Lucy looked at Tom and shook her head slightly, to let him know to stop the questioning. "So can I give them this picture on Friday when they come round?"

"Erm, ok. Why don't you put it in your room so it doesn't get lost" Lucy said not wanting to upset her daughter who was obviously very pleased with her handiwork. Mollie nodded, got down off the chair and skipped out of the room. "Well, I guess that confirms it." Lucy turned to her husband who shook his head. "She shouldn't have had to see that, she's too young. What were you saying about being discreet?"

"Come on Tom, that's not fair. You heard her. She was in her room. There's no way they could have known that she was watching them. By the sounds of it, it was a quick kiss on the lips in the privacy of their own garden, nothing more than that. Anyway, look at her. Is she upset about it? Has it traumatised her? Left her scarred for life?"

"No, she seems fine about it."

"Exactly so what's the problem? Children her age accept things a lot easier than older children and adults do."

Tom sighed. "Friday could be fun then when she presents them with that picture. What are we going to do?"

"Maybe when she's at school it could find its way into the recycling bin and we can get her to draw them another one."

"Knowing her, she'd draw the same thing again. You saw how proud she was of it. I guess we'll just have to play it by ear, see what happens."

On Friday, when Aaron and Flynn got in from work, they showered and got changed ready to go next door. "Should be a laugh tonight. I'm looking forward to it" Aaron said.

"Yeah, me too. Best behaviour though. You make sure you keep your hands to yourself. 'Til we get home anyway."

"Hmm. Do you think they know about us?"

"Don't know. Doubt it. We've only spoken to them a few times. I suppose they'll figure it out sooner or later."

"Yeah well I'm not hiding it from them. You know, if they ask questions about us."

"Ooh, get you Mr Out and Proud." Flynn smiled warmly at Aaron.

"I just don't see the point in lying that's all. If they don't like it, that's up to them." He kissed Flynn quickly on the lips as he walked past him. "Grab them beers out of the fridge will you. I'm just nipping to the loo then we can go."

Tom and Lucy welcomed them in to their home with a big smile. Weather wise, the evening was a pleasant one, warm enough to sit in the garden for a while anyway so after they'd accepted a drink, that's what they did. Mollie was jumping on her trampoline and was very excited to see Aaron and Flynn. She wanted them to join her but her Dad persuaded her to leave them alone for a little while. "So, how are you settling in?" he asked.

"Alright thanks. The area's a bit quieter than we're used to. We were in town before but apart from that, it's good" Flynn said with a smile.

"What about the other neighbours? Have you had a chance to speak to any of them yet?"

Aaron and Flynn told them about the ones they'd met and true to his word, Tom told them about the rest of the neighbours and what they were like. The conversation was flowing nicely and they all seemed to be getting on well. "Dad, can Aaron and Flynn come and play with me now?" Mollie asked.

"That's up to them sweetheart."

"Come on then. Show me what you can do" Aaron said putting his drink down, getting up and walking down the garden towards a beaming Mollie.

"What about you Flynn?"

"I'll come down in a few minutes" Flynn said smiling. "Maybe you can show Aaron how it's done. He's rubbish on a trampoline."

The three of them who were left carried on talking, nothing too probing, occasionally looking at Mollie as she shouted for them to watch her. "Fancy another drink?" Tom asked.

"Yeah, that'd be good. Thanks."

"I've got some pizzas in the freezer if you're hungry" Lucy said.

"We've always got room for pizza" Flynn replied with a smile.

"Right, Back in a minute" she said, following her husband into the house. Flynn picked Aaron's drink up and took it down to him. "Having fun" he asked handing it to him.

"Aaron won't have a go" Mollie whined "I keep asking him but he says he's too old."

"What? Don't listen to him. You're never too old for a bounce on a trampoline." Flynn took his trainers off and began jumping up and down on the trampoline with Mollie.

"Now try a star jump, like this" Mollie said showing Flynn how it was done. They spent a few minutes with Mollie showing Flynn things she wanted him to copy while Aaron stood watching the happy scene in front of him. Suddenly, Mollie got off the trampoline. "You two wait here. I've got a picture for you. I drew it all by myself" she called back to them as she ran off. Aaron and Flynn looked at each other. "Well weren't you having fun? I know what to get you for Christmas now" Aaron said.

"Yeah well your turn next. Too old my foot." Flynn put his trainers back on just as Mollie came running up to them and proudly handed her picture to Aaron. "Here you go" she said "Wow, thank you" Aaron said as he took the drawing from her. "You're welcome" she said jumping back on the trampoline. Flynn watched as the colour started to drain from Aaron's face. Aaron looked up at him before handing him the picture. Flynn took it and looked at it before looking back at Aaron. He began to feel a bit queasy. They walked a few steps away from Mollie so she wouldn't hear them.

"Why would she draw us like this? We've been really careful whenever she's been around" Aaron said quietly.

"I know. We even watch what we say. You don't think she's shown her Mum and Dad do you?"

"I don't know. Probably. What do we do now?"

"How should I know. I've never been outed in a child's drawing before." They laughed nervously and looked towards the house where Tom and Lucy were returning with their drinks. Flynn sighed."We better go talk to them" he said. As Flynn and Aaron walked towards them, Tom and Lucy saw the piece of paper that Flynn was holding and knew instantly what it was. "She gave you the picture then" Lucy said smiling at them. "She showed it to us when she'd finished it. Gave us a bit of a surprise I must admit."

"It gave you a surprise. Imagine how we feel" Aaron said. "We're always careful when she's around. I don't know what she could have seen to have made her draw this."

"She was in her room the other day looking out of the window and she saw you two in your garden" Tom said hoping he wouldn't have to say any more.

"Oh right. Did you have to answer a load of awkward questions?" Flynn asked.

"Actually, none at all. It didn't bother her in the slightest and for the record, it doesn't bother us either." Aaron and Flynn smiled at them both, the initial panic that they'd been feeling beginning to disappear.

"So have you been together long?" Lucy asked "if you don't mind me asking."

"No it's fine" Aaron said. "About four years now. We're actually sorting out our wedding at the moment. We're getting married in September."

"Oh congratulations. See, I told you about the rings didn't I?" Lucy said triumphantly to her husband.

"Yes you did. Is that pizza I can smell burning?"

She smiled sarcastically and went into the house. The rest of the evening went really well. After Mollie had gone to bed, they all sat and chatted like they'd known each other for ages. Lucy eventually went up to bed around eleven, leaving the three of them to their video games. When Aaron and Flynn got up to leave at about 1.30 in the morning, Tom nodded towards Mollie's drawing. "Want me to get rid of that for you. She'll never know."

"Actually, I quite like it" Flynn said. "We'll keep it. I might put it on the fridge or something."

"Well, if you're sure." Tom walked them to the door and opened it to let them out. "Thanks for coming round. Next time, I'll get rid of Lucy. We can have a takeaway and a whole evening of gaming."

"Sounds like a plan. Just let us know when" Flynn said.

When they were in their own house, Flynn went to get another couple of beers out of the fridge and put the drawing on the side.

"You're not seriously going to put that on the fridge are you?" Aaron asked, taking the can that Flynn held out to him.

"Maybe. I don't know. It is quite sweet when you think about it."

"No, it really isn't" Aaron said taking a swig of his lager. "Fancy watching a DVD, I'm not ready for bed yet."

"Ok, you choose."

"I was going to anyway." Aaron put the film on and they settled down to watch it. "Do you think we should invite them to the wedding?"

"Could do I suppose. They have been really nice to us since we moved in." Aaron nodded in agreement.

"We'll have a think about it and decide later" Flynn said cuddling into Aaron. "Now shut up and watch the film."


End file.
